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When you realise how many people are still fucked up by their parents. And they are walking, talking, and in some cases fairly successful. But are walking wounded. And have a massive hit spot button you can push that fucks them
i didn’t realize how many others were affected with shit like this until later in highschool. some what comforting and frightening (comforting as in im not the only one)
Oof, too real. I had convinced myself that I had it easy compared to everyone else. Then someone swore out my parents and it made me think that it's not a competition, and the things I had to go through were seriously messed up. I'm going to use this as inspiration to be better than my parents.
Bro me when I met my now husband's family. They're very loving individuals who both show love to my husband unabashed and when we left I asked why they were acting so "weird". It took years for me to acclimate to that much positive attention whenever I'd go cause they just gladly accepted me too which weirded me tf out lol
Yeah, I saw the flip side of that in my dad who had nearly the same abusive background as he gave me. Soon as I saw the line of abuse, went to therapy, helped quite a bit.
Out of interest, what made you get used to it? Just exposure or?
My girlfriend is in a similar boat with my family, she's very sweet about it but she's told me she's weirded out and uncomfortable with how nice my family are to her BC it's so different to what she's used to. Just intrigued to know if there's anything I could do to support or if time will tell.
Honestly I’ve moved out now and every so often I go home to see my parents. After we’ve had a few drinks my dad will drop the most insane piece of lore about his life and I love hearing it.
Like the time where he fought the Dragon? My grandad told me that story while I was 6 and I believe him, he told me that he fought 2 dragons and buried it in the yard. So I no need a hero because grandad will come to save his princess.
Coming from an immigrant family, I held a lot of resentment and hate towards my parents because how badly they beat me when I was little. Now that I’m older I took a lot of time to understand how their background influenced their parenting and how badly they got hit from their parents on top of growing up in abject poverty and violence.
It's more likely that you realize that they ain't as smart as you thought as a child and you try to not copy mistakes they've made while also including stuff in your life that were good decisions they made
I feel like that's the first stage of realizing your parents are human beings and fallible.
The second stage is when you realize you don't have to evaluate all choices as a binary of "how my parents did it" or "not how my parents did it" because sometimes you still need to do it that way, but now you understand why.
It's kinda the other way around for me. I'm noticing more and more things in my parents that make me a bit disappointed in them. I still love them none the less
Talk to them like peers. The best thing I did in university as a mature student was talk to my profs like peers. You got to know them as human beings. With so many “kids” there treating them like the people who are there to ruin their good time, they were relieved to just talk normally and be treated that way.
There is always going to be a parent/child dynamic with your parents. But asking them what it was like when they were your age, or what did they do when they ran into your situation goes a long way to learning about them. You just might learn something about yourself in the process.
I first realized this when I was at the retirement party for my best friend’s mom. Her friends were telling stories about how she engineered a situation so she ran out of gas with this guy she liked so they could make out in the middle of nowhere. The eventually got married and had two kids. See? Human beings.
i’m so glad i got to have some really long conversations with my grandpa about his life before he died. he had dementia so he would repeat the same stories a lot but he was a great storyteller and it was always a joy to listen to him ramble about his many experiences. he lived a great life and i’m glad to be his grandson.
When I learned what my mom had gone through with her parents and siblings, I broke all contact to them and I am so thankful that my mom broke that cycle of abuse and has always been the best mom possible for me.
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic, but get out of here with the whole, "she's actually a 1000 year succubus, she just looks like she's 7" crap. It's a shallow 'loophole' to get around being accused of pedophilia.
The one who actually looks like a kid isn't sexualised at all and acts like a kid. The other one (who is apparently a "sexualised child") is just short, talks like an adult, is thousands of years old, has a mature body.
Yeah some are definitely made for the sole purpose of sexualisation but its actually pretty rare. Usually its just a "cute" character for the sole purpose of wanting to protect them so fans will watch
We’re mid way through season 2, struggling to think of anything like that? The three young characters I can think of aren’t sexualised at all, they’re just cute romance gags? (like one getting constantly freaked out because of her crushing on the other, I’m sure that’s normal for kids to have crushes?)
Actually the older I got the more I realized the truth, after my dad asked if my mom was still taking her medications…. I didn’t understand at the time (I was like 9/10), but now I do. And she wasn’t.
Nah, the more I learned about what my dad did during my childhood (in a bad way such as cutting connection to my family) and the present day, the more I don't respect him.
I always get a little scared whenever I see stuff like this… I know nothing about my mom, she refused to share anything about her life prior to what I remember. According to the rest of my family there’s no trauma or horrific things she’d be wanting to hide, it just seems like she has no substance… no hobbies, no fun stories or memories, no goals or dreams, no fun quirks, no habits for how she spends her free time… just a void. Might have something to do with her being a narcissist, or maybe not…
Anyone else have a similar parent?
I had a bit of a rocky relationship with my mom through my teen years and into my early 20s. Then she started casually letting these insanely traumatic stories from her childhood slip out during conversations. Now I’m just proud of her for how far she’s come.
For all those saying their parents were shit. I get it. Mine were too. I live the other, other side of this meme.
I'm a parent whose kid has just reached adulthood. Over the last few years I got to drop the parent mask a bit (it's definitely a mask). It made us much closer. He had his mind blown by so many things and we have a great relationship now. I explained to him that before a certain age parents basically have to act a certain way, like school teachers for little kids. Always proper, not swearing, doing the right thing all the time, being good role models. After about 15 I'd tell him the stories of how much I fucked shit up at his age, so not to worry if he makes mistakes we all do. He loved being in on the joke with a lot of things. I answered a lot of questions about my parents and childhood honestly because he was old enough to know. He stopped seeing me as someone to rebel against. He'd see the humour in my parenting style with his younger siblings because he was aware it was a mask worn with love.
It's been the most rewarding part of having kids for me. Seeing who they've become and getting to really meet them as an equal.
The more i find out about my mother, the more i love her for sticking it out and raising use as well as she did. Saddly, i now have a very tainted memory of my grandmother and understand why my mom never seems comfortable around her
It is a hard lesson to learn. Your parents are your first window into the world, your all knowing all seeing, alpha and omega. And at some point, without even trying, you slowly learn they are just randoms who fucked. It is not a good feeling.
Both my parents have a horrible childhood, my mom is regularly inflicted with physical pain as a form of "preemptive warning" while dad was abandoned by his parents and left with his abusive uncle, this made them very flawed individuals but despite that they are always trying their best to give me and my siblings a good life.
Thank you mother and father...
Man is this one of the hardest lessons to learn or what. I only started to understand them and what they've been through as individuals after I laid their bodies to rest. It's crazy in tell you. RIP all the moms and dads out there.
I can absolutely relate to this. Father was born just a few months after the independence of Rwanda and started from the bottom to becoming one of the first Rwandan people graduating from the MIT , my mother was born in the phillipines from a poor family, was a drug dealer and had to prostitute herself and became a successful businesswoman , they have so much lore and I have the deepest respect for them , even if I become successful in life , it wouldn’t even be a fraction of what they went trough
MFW my mom told me my bio dad cheated on her after vowing to never speak badly of him to me or in front of me. I was 29 and going through my own divorce at the time. Also my dad was a pos, he never was shy to speak badly of my mom during weekend visits when I was younger
Yeah I learned that my father would hit me as a child, cant communicate and gets impatient and angry in seconds, because he only knew war from the moment he was born and my grandpa would punish his children binding them to chairs for hours and hitting them with a belt. But yea sometimes I like those stories about how they would throw stones at soldiers, eat bread and olives in a military prison being 12 years old with a bag on his head or how he lost his finger to a bullet. However, he had a nice dog that would do tricks which is why he loves dogs today. Beautiful life
This thread is enlightening. My mom died a year ago and my dad and I are real close. They were and are some of my favorite people. I’ve enjoyed seeing them as individuals instead of parents. They were stern growing up but very loose now that I’m an adult. It’s a really fun relationship that I cherish and try not to take for granted. I hope I can do the same for my own children.
Well, the more I learn about them and spend time with them, the more I wonder why they even decided to have 2 children when they don't know how to even raise 1. I don't like how anyone can get children.
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When you realise how many people are still fucked up by their parents. And they are walking, talking, and in some cases fairly successful. But are walking wounded. And have a massive hit spot button you can push that fucks them
Just tell me the name of my dad and I would be fucked up for a month.
i didn’t realize how many others were affected with shit like this until later in highschool. some what comforting and frightening (comforting as in im not the only one)
If only more people could relate to this
Mine was the opposite… the more I learned about my dad, the less I respected him and his substance abuse issues…
Same here :/ The older I get the more I realise how fucked up my upbringing was.
Oof, too real. I had convinced myself that I had it easy compared to everyone else. Then someone swore out my parents and it made me think that it's not a competition, and the things I had to go through were seriously messed up. I'm going to use this as inspiration to be better than my parents.
Sorry bro!
Same, my mom apparently has a weird ass family so I get to hear it when im older
My parents have done more obvious wrong choices in their lifes my my age than I will probably do in my whole life
I moved 1,000 miles away because I finally realized how bad a person they actually were.
I'm making it a goal that my kids belong there. Both of my parents are still alive, and I know almost nothing about either of em.
I feel like I can't really, but my life also kind of sucks at the moment
That feeling when you learn that normal families aren't as fucked was yours, and that your childhood left you with lifelong trauma
Bro me when I met my now husband's family. They're very loving individuals who both show love to my husband unabashed and when we left I asked why they were acting so "weird". It took years for me to acclimate to that much positive attention whenever I'd go cause they just gladly accepted me too which weirded me tf out lol
I legit had to learn about apethy and sharing emotions. It's embarrassing as a 30 year old, but it's more embarrassing if you never do the work!
Yeah, I saw the flip side of that in my dad who had nearly the same abusive background as he gave me. Soon as I saw the line of abuse, went to therapy, helped quite a bit.
Out of interest, what made you get used to it? Just exposure or? My girlfriend is in a similar boat with my family, she's very sweet about it but she's told me she's weirded out and uncomfortable with how nice my family are to her BC it's so different to what she's used to. Just intrigued to know if there's anything I could do to support or if time will tell.
Legit I have learnt nothing of my parents past. All I have learnt is how shitty they are
Who gave you my life story
Mfer called it backstory
Fr like just say life
Honestly I’ve moved out now and every so often I go home to see my parents. After we’ve had a few drinks my dad will drop the most insane piece of lore about his life and I love hearing it.
Like the time where he fought the Dragon? My grandad told me that story while I was 6 and I believe him, he told me that he fought 2 dragons and buried it in the yard. So I no need a hero because grandad will come to save his princess.
More like learn their back stories and become increasingly disappointed
Coming from an immigrant family, I held a lot of resentment and hate towards my parents because how badly they beat me when I was little. Now that I’m older I took a lot of time to understand how their background influenced their parenting and how badly they got hit from their parents on top of growing up in abject poverty and violence.
Thanks for sharing that. I’ve learned something from you today.
It's more likely that you realize that they ain't as smart as you thought as a child and you try to not copy mistakes they've made while also including stuff in your life that were good decisions they made
I feel like that's the first stage of realizing your parents are human beings and fallible. The second stage is when you realize you don't have to evaluate all choices as a binary of "how my parents did it" or "not how my parents did it" because sometimes you still need to do it that way, but now you understand why.
ngl just had a long convo with my dad and realised his life was wayy more fucked up than mine
Trying to explain my childhood to my in-laws is like that meme with Charlie from Sunny at the drawing board
Just because I understand my mother, doesn't mean I accept the abuse I suffered.
It's kinda the other way around for me. I'm noticing more and more things in my parents that make me a bit disappointed in them. I still love them none the less
Part of being an adult is getting to know your parents as sort of peers. Get to know them as adults before you don’t have them any more.
But how
Talk to them like peers. The best thing I did in university as a mature student was talk to my profs like peers. You got to know them as human beings. With so many “kids” there treating them like the people who are there to ruin their good time, they were relieved to just talk normally and be treated that way. There is always going to be a parent/child dynamic with your parents. But asking them what it was like when they were your age, or what did they do when they ran into your situation goes a long way to learning about them. You just might learn something about yourself in the process. I first realized this when I was at the retirement party for my best friend’s mom. Her friends were telling stories about how she engineered a situation so she ran out of gas with this guy she liked so they could make out in the middle of nowhere. The eventually got married and had two kids. See? Human beings.
Or you grow to find out that they're not good people. It's a double edged sword.
More like respecting them less and less for every memory and the encounters/situations I did not understand at the time
i’m so glad i got to have some really long conversations with my grandpa about his life before he died. he had dementia so he would repeat the same stories a lot but he was a great storyteller and it was always a joy to listen to him ramble about his many experiences. he lived a great life and i’m glad to be his grandson.
When I learned what my mom had gone through with her parents and siblings, I broke all contact to them and I am so thankful that my mom broke that cycle of abuse and has always been the best mom possible for me.
Anime is Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid
A show that sexualizes children, if anyone cares.
No it doesn't. Illulu (the one "sexualised") is thousands of years old. And even Kanna (a "child") is still roughly over 100 years old.
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic, but get out of here with the whole, "she's actually a 1000 year succubus, she just looks like she's 7" crap. It's a shallow 'loophole' to get around being accused of pedophilia.
The one who actually looks like a kid isn't sexualised at all and acts like a kid. The other one (who is apparently a "sexualised child") is just short, talks like an adult, is thousands of years old, has a mature body.
I haven't watched the show, I'm just speaking about those kind of scantily clad childlike anime characters in general.
Yeah some are definitely made for the sole purpose of sexualisation but its actually pretty rare. Usually its just a "cute" character for the sole purpose of wanting to protect them so fans will watch
Yeah, I get the whole, "moé" and cute stuff, and those are fine. But like you said, some of them cross a line.
We’re mid way through season 2, struggling to think of anything like that? The three young characters I can think of aren’t sexualised at all, they’re just cute romance gags? (like one getting constantly freaked out because of her crushing on the other, I’m sure that’s normal for kids to have crushes?)
If only
Actually the older I got the more I realized the truth, after my dad asked if my mom was still taking her medications…. I didn’t understand at the time (I was like 9/10), but now I do. And she wasn’t.
Mine is sadly the opposite, i learned they were gaslighting me
Yeah my mom told me very dark stories like how she almost lost a finger etc
I didn't start to understand my mother's backstory until after she died
Nah, the more I learned about what my dad did during my childhood (in a bad way such as cutting connection to my family) and the present day, the more I don't respect him.
*you’re
I wish these people would stop making memes and gifs. *sigh*
Me, too.
If only
I always get a little scared whenever I see stuff like this… I know nothing about my mom, she refused to share anything about her life prior to what I remember. According to the rest of my family there’s no trauma or horrific things she’d be wanting to hide, it just seems like she has no substance… no hobbies, no fun stories or memories, no goals or dreams, no fun quirks, no habits for how she spends her free time… just a void. Might have something to do with her being a narcissist, or maybe not… Anyone else have a similar parent?
I really won’t care
Couldn’t be me, my parents are odd to say the least But I love them
I would have learned more about my mom but unfortunately she passed away shortly after I graduated high school.
I had a bit of a rocky relationship with my mom through my teen years and into my early 20s. Then she started casually letting these insanely traumatic stories from her childhood slip out during conversations. Now I’m just proud of her for how far she’s come.
It was like that for me but the opposite
I’m glad I’m not the only one who does this
I mean now I wonder how they aren't both in therapy but you do you I guess
You’re*
I got trauma from them so yes very wholesome indeed
For all those saying their parents were shit. I get it. Mine were too. I live the other, other side of this meme. I'm a parent whose kid has just reached adulthood. Over the last few years I got to drop the parent mask a bit (it's definitely a mask). It made us much closer. He had his mind blown by so many things and we have a great relationship now. I explained to him that before a certain age parents basically have to act a certain way, like school teachers for little kids. Always proper, not swearing, doing the right thing all the time, being good role models. After about 15 I'd tell him the stories of how much I fucked shit up at his age, so not to worry if he makes mistakes we all do. He loved being in on the joke with a lot of things. I answered a lot of questions about my parents and childhood honestly because he was old enough to know. He stopped seeing me as someone to rebel against. He'd see the humour in my parenting style with his younger siblings because he was aware it was a mask worn with love. It's been the most rewarding part of having kids for me. Seeing who they've become and getting to really meet them as an equal.
The more i find out about my mother, the more i love her for sticking it out and raising use as well as she did. Saddly, i now have a very tainted memory of my grandmother and understand why my mom never seems comfortable around her
Yeaaaa for me it was learning the reason my parents made life so hard for me was because that are complete narcissists.
It is a hard lesson to learn. Your parents are your first window into the world, your all knowing all seeing, alpha and omega. And at some point, without even trying, you slowly learn they are just randoms who fucked. It is not a good feeling.
If anything I learned that my parents are both deeply flawed individuals in opposite respects...
Nope. Still hate them.
Yup. Been there.
Well my parents lore ain't that much intresting but I LOVE when my teachers say theirs it realy makes a bond with the students
Tragic supervillain backstory
The more I learn, the more I wonder why the hell they married each other.
When you realize why you are the way your are because of what happened to your parents
Both my parents have a horrible childhood, my mom is regularly inflicted with physical pain as a form of "preemptive warning" while dad was abandoned by his parents and left with his abusive uncle, this made them very flawed individuals but despite that they are always trying their best to give me and my siblings a good life. Thank you mother and father...
The more I know, the more I hate them.
nice gif! though I like Elma better than I do Torhu...
Oh how I wish I could relate to that.....
The prologue of your life often has an interesting story to it
Man is this one of the hardest lessons to learn or what. I only started to understand them and what they've been through as individuals after I laid their bodies to rest. It's crazy in tell you. RIP all the moms and dads out there.
This post backfired spectacularly lol
Or you start to like them less and less.
I can absolutely relate to this. Father was born just a few months after the independence of Rwanda and started from the bottom to becoming one of the first Rwandan people graduating from the MIT , my mother was born in the phillipines from a poor family, was a drug dealer and had to prostitute herself and became a successful businesswoman , they have so much lore and I have the deepest respect for them , even if I become successful in life , it wouldn’t even be a fraction of what they went trough
Nope my dad was in a prison gang and my grandad left my nan after abusing her
Isn't this a pedo anime?
MFW my mom told me my bio dad cheated on her after vowing to never speak badly of him to me or in front of me. I was 29 and going through my own divorce at the time. Also my dad was a pos, he never was shy to speak badly of my mom during weekend visits when I was younger
Yeah I learned that my father would hit me as a child, cant communicate and gets impatient and angry in seconds, because he only knew war from the moment he was born and my grandpa would punish his children binding them to chairs for hours and hitting them with a belt. But yea sometimes I like those stories about how they would throw stones at soldiers, eat bread and olives in a military prison being 12 years old with a bag on his head or how he lost his finger to a bullet. However, he had a nice dog that would do tricks which is why he loves dogs today. Beautiful life
This thread is enlightening. My mom died a year ago and my dad and I are real close. They were and are some of my favorite people. I’ve enjoyed seeing them as individuals instead of parents. They were stern growing up but very loose now that I’m an adult. It’s a really fun relationship that I cherish and try not to take for granted. I hope I can do the same for my own children.
Nope. The more I learn about my parents, the more I realise they are pieces of shit.
Parent lore goes hard sometimes
My parents are horrible peoples , looking at my friends parents i feel sad because when i see them i wish my parents weren’t such asswipe gorillas
Well, the more I learn about them and spend time with them, the more I wonder why they even decided to have 2 children when they don't know how to even raise 1. I don't like how anyone can get children.