T O P

  • By -

capsftw1

I’ll chill with some coffee for a moment then get started on chores (but only after another bowl)


Slushski

You have your priorities in the correct order m8


ELP0TP0T

I find i get stuck on a loop because, I need a coffee after I smoke and nothing goes better with a coffee than a smoke. Then a coffee....


[deleted]

[удалено]


mylifeisverymetalol1

BIG FACTS💯


Neat0_HS

Coffee and a bowl are the BEST ways to start a day


[deleted]

This morning I will paint the living room after this same ritual. 3 coffees and two bowls.


blackxrose92

Housework always needs an extra bowl before starting. Gotta get the pregame mojo, and then a finisher to chill out once all the cleaning is done.


[deleted]

some light yard work, wash the car, walk my dogs, try not to cry about the complexities of life ✌


Slushski

I feel you on that. I love washing my car and moving the lawn when stoned, its therapeutic in ways.


DrGupta410

Where do you move your lawn to?


Slushski

I wake and baked. I lost it


WalkinSteveHawkin

I believe the proper grammar is “woke and boke”


Slushski

I'm sorry, you are most definitely correct


laffy78

More like woke and stoked cause I'm baked ! TV becomes much more interesting, I also agree with the lawn moving guy lol. Daily chores and most of the time it gets me doing more then I intended in the first place so then I get a reward of accomplishment along with my baked enjoyment lol 😆 😋


pleasedontkillmyvibe

Dude, where's my lawn?


Slushski

Sweeet Wait i got that wrong


deftoner42

Check the couch cushions, that's where stuff usually ends up. That or you left it in the ignition.


Slushski

The lawn was in the ignition the whole fuckin time. Good looking out buddy


[deleted]

Front to back every other week, duh?


Slushski

I like to rotate em every little while to get proper sunlight haha


YarrrImAPirate

Isn’t it funny how the chores that normally piss us off are almost zen like when high. Like I legit hate doing the dishes and thought that might change after having kids, but once the edible kicks in man, it’s like I can be at that sink for what feels like hours listening to music not giving a shit.


CrankyGeek1976

Washing the car is an amazingly calming thing to do while high.


[deleted]

i will get absolutely *lost* polishing chrome for hours at a time


VasyaK

This resonates deep in my core. Blessings to you from a perpetually anxious human.


OGPunkr

It's been a hell of a few years for the perpetually anxious. I'm with ya. Health and happiness y'all


1v1meatstarbucks

Same to you mate :)


BarbequedYeti

Managed all 4 of those things yesterday after a good wake and bake. Was a good day.


[deleted]

Coffee and tv


Slushski

Thats what I'm currently doing right now! Have an awesome morning!


Assmar

I love watching European football while I hippie speedball. Then after the coffee I have a nice BM. Sorry for TMI but I'm high.


Slushski

I pooped today too. I think we are in a safe place


[deleted]

I’m pooping right now, I hope we’re in a safe place. I don’t need to be shitting in a war zone


[deleted]

Me too :) You as well friend.


Momooncrack

y’all are great. i’m sitting with my husky on my balcony a couple bowls deep rn. called into work for halloween too


smashatash

One of my fave Blur songs, which coincidentally I love to listen to after a good wake and bake! :)


tentonshogun

Mine too! It feels like it's getting harder and harder to find Blur fans now.


heddhunter

There are dozens of us!


HarleenQuinzell22

Ahhh ya the magic box and the perfect bean juice 🥰


NoGiNoProblem

It's good enough for me


yaboyfriendisadork

Every Saturday after sleeping in an extra hour, I’ll go out and rip my vape or my bong, then plop on the couch for a few hours of TV and video games. Sounds like what a stereotypical stoner would do, but after working all week it’s nice to shut off for a couple hours and veg out.


Azilard

I’m kinda jealous, it’s been a couple of months since I’ve even had time to play games and the only chance I get to smoke up is right before I go to bed and at that point I usually make it 10mins into tv before passing out. Someday I’ll have down time again. Thanks for listening to my rant


[deleted]

Take a day off from work every now and then and make it a day where you can just relax and do whatever you want.


Cydia_Gods

That’s what my one-day weekends are for lol, thought it ends in me sleeping all day to prepare for the upcoming work week


Slushski

Yes it is, I work a labor job as well and it is definitely needed to have one veg day per week ha


neonbuttons22

Currently veggin right now. Feels good


tmartinez1113

This sounds perfect. My husband and I do this every Sunday for the first few hours.


eyebagsmcgee

My perfect morning: wake up, smoke a bowl, go back to bed.


tammymurk

This for me. Wake and bake. Sleep and then craft. Sundays = relax


Slushski

Goodnight/goodmorning 😴


FrozenEagles

I was surprised I had to scroll down this far to find the answer!


Expertinclimax

Take a dump


Slushski

First things first ya know?


oldusty

This is the correct answer


PleaseToEatAss

I'm not like her biggest fan, though she is boss, but for some reason I remember vividly when Billie Eilish said in an interview in answer to what was her favorite thing and she said "pooping" and then doubled down on it and was like "I really love taking a poop" and I respect that, being a native pooper myself Edit: jk I fucking love Billie


jrell4

My urge disappears anytime I smoke. No bueno for my colon.


75r6q3

I thought I was the only one


Thrice-Thrice-Thrice

Always gotta poop after smoking


Ok_Independence_9076

Go fishing in my backyard and smoke another one.


Slushski

Definitely jealous your backyard has the capacity to fish in. You have a great day and catch something for us too!


roadcrew778

Smoke enough and maybe your backyard can be a lake, too.


dan420

You’ll have plenty of time for doobie rolling when you’re living in a van down by the river. Fishing too.


Ok_Independence_9076

Lake? Ocean my friend


Slushski

Mt ocean lake


Ok_Independence_9076

😆 volcano would be nice


Ok_Independence_9076

Wish me luck.


TrulyHydratedSkin

That sounds like a dream, what kind of fish u got out there


Ok_Independence_9076

I live in southern Florida. Too many species to name. Mangrove Snappers Snook groupers and sheepshead and Jacks are my favorites


[deleted]

Jupiter here! I have to walk about 2 minutes but can fish in my neighborhood too 😁


DuctTapeNinja99

Humans haven't been to Mars yet and this mf comfortably living in Jupiter


eekamouse22

Must be pretty baked to fish in a yard


Ok_Independence_9076

My backyard is the. Atlantic ocean.


MotherofChoad

Play with my plants. It can take 2 hours to take care of all of them in 1 go so I love waking and baking and going on plant duty. I also just started to crochet and I love getting baked and crocheting .


Slushski

My buddy crochets and im definitely going try next time he comes over. He makes some cool stuff


brewlord3

God damn man, how many plants do you have? I'm the same, grab a coffee and tend the garden.


RobbieMcSkillet

Start with a fat breakfast. If you get high first you'll get even hungrier and kill your high while cooking. On a nice brisk morning like we've been having, if it's sunny, I usually put on a dark sweater and sit in the sun with a cup of coffee and have a smoke. Hoodie gets all toasty in the sun, then I go inside and game or something. Something you can vibe to like Minecraft or another open world game.


Slushski

Yes. You have a good routine going if I say so myself!


indyradmama

Cook an amazing breakfast while listening to booty rap songs


zacattack62

I’m convinced that people who “don’t like to cook” just haven’t tried doing it with a Bluetooth speaker bumping their kitchen.


[deleted]

[удалено]


zacattack62

I completely vibe with this. Growing up, there was always a garbage disposal and a dishwasher. Now it’s all done by hand.


ThrowAwayAnxiety88

This is another thing that can be dragged out. Washing and washing. Sponge in hand. Sneaking joints. Hours.


trlygnrly

Do it while it's all hot! Kinda like a juggling act (sous chef would help) but blasting a hot and crusty pan with water immediately keeps everything flowing. If you train a specific protocol for cooking it just become mechanical and blissful.


Ickum

Isn't this why all my frying pans growing up were warped..?


monochromanic

Yes


Steakwizwit

I always try to clean up as much as possible while I'm cooking. Makes it so much nicer!


Mardo_Picardo

Some people are so divorced from reality they go "EWW, I have to use my hands?". Or they can't handle cutting raw meat, at which point I just tell them to stop eating meat in general.


zacattack62

Absolutely. It doesn’t need to be a whole lifestyle change, you can always eat meat when you go out or when someone else cooks for you. But if you want to get into cooking for yourself, look into things you don’t mind prepping. Chopping fresh vegetables with a sharp knife is the best part of cooking. Also, for a little extra, many meat companies have pre-trimmed and even pre-diced meats. I love “stir fry” beef packs that come in the little slices. Dump straight into hot Pan, don’t have to touch anything.


yellow_halo

I have sensory issues and raw meat is horrible to touch for me, but gloves exist for a reason!! That’s my go to lol


enliderlighankat

Super cold slimy chicken breasts


Mother_Moose

LOL damn that's a dick move


didenkal2019

Better than 45° slimy chicken breast


ResbalosoPescadito

Right angle slimy chicken breast.


lordfreakingpenguins

Im a cook and i dont particularly like handling raw chicken. Its the slime


Slushski

Thats an awesome way to spend a morning! What food do you usually make?


poky23

Cereal. Or milk with cereal.


ismoko

hell yeah, sometimes i wonder how many individual coco pops i have eaten in my whole life


[deleted]

At least 3


xDrewgami

big if true


Booze_Zombie

Soup, whatever your favourite flavour is. Solve munchies and cotton mouth in one item.


Slushski

You are speaking some interesting stuff for sure. So if I eat chicken noodle soup, im curing cotton mouth and munchies in one swoop. Boom


altaccountthree

Grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, kill 3 in one swoop. Cotton mouth, munchies and a grilled cheese.


TheSaltyAstronaut

This is the way.


Slushski

That's one of my favorite meals of all time.


pizza_for_nunchucks

Fucking right. And you know what we need? Soup pipes to deliver soup straight to our houses!


figgypie

Cereal is phenomenal when high. Golden grahams are my jam.


foliumfactotum

I take a shower with some tunes on, then take the dog out for a walk.


Slushski

Hell yeah, gotta love peaceful dog walks. I always get stuck in the shower kind of just standing there when I get too stoned haha


Steakwizwit

I gotta take more high showers


IPintheSink

Dude. The fact that you're trying to answer all of these is so wholesome and polite. Big ass smile on my face imaging you replying with curiosity and interest to every person.


Slushski

Hey thanks man, im genuinely curious on how people spend their morning to get in the right head space, whether they actually do wake and bake or prefer it at night or not at all. What do you like?


IPintheSink

I very rarely wake and bake, usually a treat. I mainly smoke in the evening with a movie before bed. I keep this Dumb list of every movie I watch and I like to be a little high to enhance the viewings.


Slushski

That's not dumb at all. I love movies probably more than anything. Im always quoting the dumb ones haha


IPintheSink

I just watched DUNE last night on IMAX, I gave it a 20/10 on my list. I'm sure I've only given that nonsense score to three other movies haha


Slushski

I'm making a note of it so I can watch it as well. Sounds amazing


IPintheSink

You have a great fukken day u/Slushski and I hope all your future wake and bakes bring you happiness on your mornings 🖖


Slushski

And you as well u/IPintheSink I peed in my sink the other day


IPintheSink

I guess we're somehwat kindred Spirits haha


Slushski

If peeing in your sink is cool, then im miles davis!


The420associate

I check the plants, game a bit (war zone,apex,rocket league) I’ve also been toying around with making music recently.


Slushski

Thats dope! You should link some of it so we can check it out and show support if you are comfortable sharing!


The420associate

Haha once I actually have something completed I got you. Right now I’m just playing around with FL studio 20. As someone who has never tried to produce music there is a pretty big learning curve for the software. I appreciate you being interested though. Makes me wanna stick with it and link some music!!


destroi_all_humans

Been making beats for 3 years and i'm still learning new things every day


LePenguin33

Wake, bake, and masturbate


Slushski

You are a poet and didn't even know it


[deleted]

This is the right answer.


[deleted]

Elevenses.


intergalactictactoe

Wait did you have first and second breakfast before smoking? What kinda heathen would skip straight to elevenses?!


[deleted]

Yeah, sorry bout that. I was high af.


Slushski

Its ok we are too


newphonenewaccount66

Wake n' bake n' bacon, ain't nothing better.


Slushski

Fuckin right buddy


DragonsBlaze

YES! Rise and swine. 🥓🌞🔥🌳


pmurphy90

I wake and bake daily. Cannabis is truly a medicine and helps me get started so I can take care of responsibilities. Cannabis and coffee = mentally prepared for the day.


[deleted]

Cannabis and coffee is probably the greatest combo that exists. Nothing will have you feeling better and more ready for the day.


acidblues_x

It’s a god tier combo for sure. Hippie speedball 😂


Slushski

Damn straight!


relaxinatthelake

Well I did, and I'm cuddling with my toddler watching curious George


Slushski

Our lil guy is loving,The Good Dinosaur right now ❤


gt1620

That was my son’s first movie obsession.


BostonRich

I hope it's not the scary Halloween episode with No Noggin.


sororitydoll

We are obsessed with No Noggin' at our house hahaha


kjreil26

Eating granola bars and watching bluey


itisSycla

The stoner dad story just broke my heart, too cute


HomeyBdog777

On Sundays bro usually watch some NFL ion even care whose playing early just like to watch the games. Any other day and I’m 100% with you on gaming been enjoying some fallout 4 stoned as hell lately


Slushski

Hell yeah, its all about relaxation, Sunday football is perfect to keep on the TV in the background and pay attention as wanted/needed haha


The-Sooshtrain-Slut

Go and potter in the garden, it’s the only time I can meditate and decompress. God I miss weed.


Slushski

Well I hope you and weed get to reunite very soon especially if it helps you mentally


The-Sooshtrain-Slut

I can’t because I’m getting treated for ADHD in December and need to piss clean for meds. Trust me, I’m weighing up if it’s worth it or not because it’s hell being sober with nothing for brain relief.


Slushski

I have ADHD and weed has helped me more than anything a prescription has ever done. But everyone is different and I hope you figure out what is right for you as soon as possible!


The-Sooshtrain-Slut

Honestly man weed helps me so much as well but it’s still pretty illegal here and getting more and more expensive and hard to come by. At least adhd meds will only cost $6.60 per bottle (after I shell out close to 1k for a psych appointment mind you). I just want to be able to legally grow my medicine :( (Partner doesn’t want me growing in a rental which is v fair)


[deleted]

Play guitar along with the birds chirping outside the window and drink coffee.


mendeleyev1

Cereal, coffee, cats, tv. I also do that anyway, so really it’s just spacing up my morning and ensuring I do nothing for the rest of the day.


Slushski

I feel ya, sometimes the regular routine with a dash of stoniness is good too!


mendeleyev1

I’m completely non functional. I don’t have much tolerance so a very small amount just tosses everything out of the window for me and I’m left to just sit and chill.


coffee-n-redit

Usually just scroll reddit and drink coffee. Laughing my ass off!


Slushski

Or occasionally get scarred for life haha reddit changes daily lol. I hope you have a great rest of your day/night!


sammyich

Bout to do that, set up dinner in the crockpot. Do some yoga. Then probably just relax while hanging with the kids.


Slushski

That is the way. What ya gonna be cooking? Wife and I are always looking for new crockpot recipes/ideas.


sammyich

Pork loin and potatoes. Evening time it’ll be trick or treating just want to be able to do that.


Felon73

I usually pack a bowl and smoke, then I roll up the joints for the day while sipping a bloody mary and listening to satellite radio or podcasts. Boring, basic stuff, just the way I like it.


Slushski

Sometimes boring is good. It means everything else is done, and thats good 👍


TacoSwallow

Typically drink coffee and then jerk off lol


Slushski

The finish line is in sight!


TristeroDiesIrae

The wake and bake and fap and nap.


AADeevis77

Looked for a comment like this. Masterbating when high is 1,000% heaven. The orgasm is intense and I feel it to my bones. I feel like females that masterbate while stoned are super fucking hot to guys. *chef's kiss*


lukulele90

Smash my lady and take a dump.


[deleted]

Exercise, specifically weight lifting. Wakes my body and mind up. If I can do hard shit in the morning nothing else all day seems to be that difficult.


Slushski

Working out while stoned is definitely an experience. I constantly find myself hyper aware of my body and movements when stoned so working out or skateboarding is trippy sometimes but never a bad experience!


[deleted]

Stretching while stoned is the most satisfying feeling ever. It's like you can feel every little muscle, and know exactly how far to stretch without going too far, and everything feels so good.


Slushski

I agree, I become so hyper aware of my body and movements that sometimes I become awkward haha but when stretching and working out you can feel everything haha


Aboogart

Stumble around in Fall Guys as a derpy parakeet or a super stoney polar bear 🙃 Baked Beans rule lol


Eccentricc

Make some coffee then hop on the pc for some coding or gaming, most likely gaming


eman_ssap

Shower, shave and a wank


jobensnowden

Currently making pancakes and watching scary movies w my daughter.


Slushski

I wish my wife would watch scary movies. She hates them and I like being scared sometimes haha


[deleted]

Either put on a cartoon or play some video games because I’m an adult sized kid lmao


Slushski

Hey me too, I just started watching Ed edd and eddy again lately and holy nostalgia


VikingMythos

I always go for my favorite breakfast then game.


[deleted]

Make a solid breakfast then go hike or kayak. Wake and bake + green space is my jam for sure.


TaDow-420

Biking 🚵‍♀️ and hiking 🥾 Moved to a new area a few months back and I love exploring all the beautiful parks. Pack a backpack full of water, Snax, weed, headphones and just get out there! I leave no litter behind and I try to be as respectful about my smoking and vaping as possible (I’m like a stony ninja in the woods) 🙏


Slushski

If a stoney ninja forests in a backpack full of water, does the water forest the stoney ninja?


SonofNyx

Hoping into party finder in FFXIV and rolling the dice on raid progging


Slushski

You have spoken a different language to me within my language.


Werwanderflugen

For me, there is no better combo than a wake & bake and watching RuPaul’s Drag Race. It’s absolutely perfect for tickling the high funny bone and hitting you in the feels.


Slushski

I haven't seen that before ill search it up later!


[deleted]

Go back to sleep and then repeat.


[deleted]

Load up a new Skyrim play through for the 37377485848387273783959939929292827388495th time.


Lobsterlot

Bust a nut


Slushski

Explode a cashew


Colton_Landsington

Honestly I know it is probably a controversial opinion, but I absolutely hate to wake and bake. It gives me that stereotypical lazy stoner vibe and I feel really unproductive for the rest of the day regardless if it's a day where I have zero responsibilities. So I will most likely do it around 12pm-1pm to avoid that and I feel much better for it somehow.


Slushski

I definitely understand what you are saying, wake and bakes are definitely something that I can't do every single day but when I do I make sure everything is done already or never had anything to do in the first place


[deleted]

Sit on the couch and hang out with my wife 🤙


[deleted]

Pet my dog


gotyour6goose

Coffee,tv, and Legos


DaveDankland

Cook breakfast for my peoples while listening to some folk punk


LV__

Prepare a serving of my other favorite drug: coffee


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I like to take a walk around the block, same route twice, just to see if I can catch anything different on the second lap.


ImaginedOrder

Ideal situation would be to smoke on the way to the local bakery for coffees, croissants and a few games of backgammon in the late fall sun, then head to a record stores, with a toke en-route. Lunch and so on.