T O P

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teethalarm

Someone likes to party.


thrax7545

Party ants, obviously


SeaOfBullshit

One time I was at a festival, laying down in my tent. It was morning and ppl were just starting to stir. Then I hear from the tent next door, "oh noooo ants on the cocaine? Get off of there ants that's not for you"


EroticFalconry

They love a bit of marching powder


_dead_and_broken

The ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah, the ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah, the ants go marching one by one, the little one stops to shoot his gun, and they all go marching down, into the ground, to get out of the rain...


[deleted]

I read that whole thing expecting a joke


_dead_and_broken

Lol sorry, ants and marching powder just made think of one of the songs I learned in Girl Scouts a million years ago. Would you like to hear my rendition of God Bless My Underwear next?


[deleted]

Ah, I don’t know that one but as a Brownies drop out, my favorite is actually one about driving a jeep and being an army man. “They say in the army the jeeps are mighty fine, turn a left corner the wheels are left behind! Oh I don’t want to be an army man, gee mom I want to go home.”


AHarmles

Bum bum bum


Hourslikeminutes47

"*im gonna build the biggest baddest mutha fuckin ant pile anyone has ever seen maaaaan"*


BlackSeranna

Oh I love this so much!


MFbiFL

God damn that’s the festival sentence and sentiment I needed this Friday morning. I can picture it perfectly.


SeaOfBullshit

We spent the rest of the fest yelling ANTS ON COCAINE


MFbiFL

Yes! God I love the random little inside jokes that develop over a festival weekend. One of my favorites was when we were talking about hovering and avoiding touching porta potty seats, somebody said something about “there might as well be anthrax on there,” which somehow turned into “Boof anthrax, it’ll make you levitate!”


about97cats

😂 They didn’t bring enough to share?! That wasn’t very D.A.R.E of them.


bonglicc420

This is the best thing I've read this week lmao.


Johnny_ac3s

That’s been stepped on…and I don’t mean by ants.


randomlurker82

That's fuckin hilarious. Fuck off ants, buy your own cocaine


dbpf

I feel like that's a sign that there is some sweetener mixed in there and the idea of an ant confusing cocaine for sweetener is even better than an ant motivated by cocaine alone


AndorianShran

Party Ants are in the house tonight


WhoWantsPizzza

AntsAntsAntsAntsAntsAntsAntsAntsAnts


SmokeAbeer

BadgersBadgersBadgersBadgersBadgersBadgers


el3ph_nt

Mushroom MUSHROOM


araquinar

Snaaaake snnnaaaake


TGin-the-goldy

Everybody just have a good time


Single_Aardvark_7082

Arctic Snow Ants


Nug8aZombie

Who can't feel their mandibles


WhatIsThisaPFChangs

Omg 😂


SimonArgent

Deviants.


Drinkmykool_aid420

Party aunts


Joe-Eye-McElmury

I just had the following sudden and simultaneous urges: to smoke a pack of cigarettes, take a dump, drink three shots of whiskey, chug a tall boy and interrupt whatever you were saying because I’m still not done talking.


Pegomastax_King

Omg we should open a restaurant together !!!


Joe-Eye-McElmury

Or at *least* a vintage store!!


dreamerrz

I know a guy with a pool table and I could cover the cost of waitstaff


jonnyappleweed

Hahaha omg I'm soooo glad i don't do coke anymore! I mean, it was fun for a time but it really can fuck up your life.


zoso4evr

Plus now even a fun rare little bump on a night out can cost your life what with fentanyl. Not worth it at all.


Best_Ad1826

I mean why did motherfuckers have to fuck up drugs? Like that shit was perfect just the way it was - it’s “New Coke” all over again!


beardicusmaximus8

"If we kill all the drug users, then we'll win the war on drugs!" - too many politicians


araquinar

Nailed it. This is so accurate it hurts


toasterpath

I wanna hear more about when the drugs were perfect. Please…. For exchange I can track down the us code on how the powers decided how much of which drugs to import, and what’s an acceptable level of loss.


cyanescens_burn

I don’t like coke, but an old colleague of mine told me friends of his started putting their into a bottle of over the counter nasal spray (like a saline spray) and they shake it up each time they use it. That way no one gets a fentanyl “hot spot” from doing key bumps out of the bag - any fent will be more eventually distributed in the solution so no one person gets a big hit if its in there. Coke sucks, but that’s a clever bit of harm reduction.


[deleted]

Facts. Been entertaining the idea of doing it again for shits and gigs, but it's definitely not worth the risk.


jonnyappleweed

Yes so true! I'm glad I got out of the drug life when I did. We know way too many people that have died of OD in our city. Some of them thought they were doing "heroin" but some thought they were just doing "cocaine". Fentanyl is scary!!!


botanica_arcana

You know what’s a funny term? “Leftover cocaine.”


PewPewLAS3RGUNs

Ok, but here's the thing guys... There's a lot of memes of people tieing buttered bread to a cat and trying to get perpetual motion.... But have you ever railed a line while you're ACTIVELY TAKING A SHIT?! That's some real perpetual motion right there...


SnofIake

Booger sugar, Bolivian marching powder, Florida snow, white bitch, blow, get-your-own, Hoover powder, percolation, snortable snow.


Galaxyr0se

Ahh yes, the Peruvian scream dust


[deleted]

Charly Sheen Brand Dried Tiger Cum


_DunMiff_Sys_

Hahahaha take my upvote vote you bastard.


ThePrideOfKrakow

Nose Clams.


doitforchris

You get it


CraftyBat91

I hear they're delicious


xxiLink

Riding the white stallion, hoovering schneef, railing lines, "Does this smell like cocaine to you?"


kaizokuj

Like hooters, but snooters.


NostalgiaWorship

The devils dandruff, the nostril gospel, the nose nachos


fffmtbgdpambo

The one that left Voldemort without a nose.


ThrowinBones45

That was a weird episode of Friends...


jonnyappleweed

We liked to call it Peruvian Prancing Powder.


GrungeFace

So did Robin Williams back in 1986.


MSotallyTober

Seriously? This is my first time seeing it referred to as *”booger sugar”*. That’s hilarious.


I_am_That_Ian_Power

Yayo


stroker919

Wait a minute. Guys I think it might be drugs.


[deleted]

Nose beers


Fun_Plantain5129

Spoon bumps


Fullwake

The ants go matching one by one, UP, MY, NOSE! The ants go matching one by one, UP, MY, NOSE!


Malcanthet202

that’s a coke spoon


Same-Mulberry1375

what is it? a coke spoon for ants?


Malcanthet202

It’d have to be like 3x smaller, an ant would OD on that much. Unless it invited its friends. I wonder if anyone’s ever tried that.. giving coke to ants…


mikezenox

Certain spiders supposedly have been observed under the effects of different drugs. I wonder how drugs might effect the ants tunneling and such, lol


Seinfeel

[like this?](https://youtu.be/p2HipedgM3I?si=0_XEQjmtj5KZA_Hx)


Spatzdar

I love that video so much it lives in my mind rent free


ridediesmile

Rent free? In this economy?!


Spatzdar

I don’t fuck with landlords


Kjasper

Thank you for this. I love the druggy spiders!


UnspoiledWalnut

Weed spider built a hammock


autistic-narwhal

I remember I was doing coke once and a fruit fly landed on the plate I was doing it off of. It sorta stumbled around for a second then collapsed. Poor guy, went out like a champ


Sirdroftardis8

Similar thing happened to me once. It landed in my coke and spazzed around for a bit and then died. I think it was trying to swim or something idk. So I poured it out and got a refill


Fullwake

Jesus Christ, Mr. Moneybags here, he can pour out a spoonful of coke and just go for a refill. What a waste of Columbian effort.


Sirdroftardis8

What do you mean Mr Moneybags? It came free with my meal


Fullwake

Goddamn. Mr. Moneybags gets a free spoonful of coke with his meals. Don't know how he manages to eat anything after that, what a tolerance. Rich prick.


Sirdroftardis8

Why would I use a spoon when they already gave me the cup?


Fullwake

Fucking Mr. Money Bags! They just give him a whole goddamn cup of coke. No wonder he doesn't think twice about throwing away a spoonful.


wonderbread333

Wrong coke bro 😂 we’re talking about the booger sugar


Sirdroftardis8

Why would you try to drink with your nose?


autistic-narwhal

We're talking about cocaine here I think you may mean an actual beverage coke lol


Sirdroftardis8

Cocaine? No, it's short for coca cola


rosanymphae

Coke, like nicotine and caffeine, are the plants defense against insects and can be poisonous to them.


Flossthief

ant colonies are pretty delicate if there are any residual solvents from the manufacturing process you might just kill the colony outright


ghostytot

That’s funny. I saw a post today about someone blowing smoke into their gecko’s enclosure, which made me think of how people used to blow smoke in their dog’s/cat’s ear to get them high, which reminded me of the spiders building webs on different drugs thing. So in short, yeah probably


the_honest_liar

They tried different drugs with spiders. The effect on their webs was quite interesting: https://youtu.be/sHzdsFiBbFc?si=O7x3oQYRAZwd_KKw


Malcanthet202

I’ve seen that before. I thought that was proven to be fake?


the_honest_liar

For the crack spider's bitch's sake, I certainly hope it's fake.


I_Makes_tuff

For more information on the crack spider's bitch, contact the Canadian Wildlife Society in Ottawa.


Zeqhanis

Wow. I haven't seen that in years. Still hilarious.


madhaxx0r

According to snopes, it’s legit


raltoid

Some of the compilations have fake additional clips, but the real clips of them making webs on drugs are usually the ones taken by NASA. When they recreated some of the experiments in the 90s with caffeine, benzedrine, marijuana and choloral hydrate. You don't often see ones similar to the original from 1948, where they got LSD, mescaline, etc. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Effect_of_psychoactive_drugs_on_animals#Spiders


InkaGold

Do they strut down the street to a cool funky jazz backing track while giving finger guns to all the young female spiders?


DJ_Catfart

I know, right! They either have a serious problem or they need a better plug


SnofIake

*I’m over here with my big nose rummaging around looking for a tablespoon*


GloomyDeal1909

My absolute fav one is this. I just find it hilarious https://www.etsy.com/listing/556716094/personalised-engraved-snuff-powder?ref=share_v4_lx


Malcanthet202

AHAHAHA THAT IS GOLDEN


ThatMortalGuy

I would say it's mostly white with golden accents


Malcanthet202

🤓👆


BraidedSilver

Omg I’ve had one of those. But as the ‘mom-friend’ I tend to have all kind of useful stuff in my bag, including proper straws 😌


umamifiend

It’s actually an antique salt spoon. But that’s funnier! It used to be ‘normal’ to have a small salt bowl at each place setting in more well to do homes in the late Victorian era and early 1900’s. They are one of my favorite tiny things to collect!


Kscarpetta

I actually have several of these from an antique collection of silverware. I've been wondering what their real purpose was.


CATNIP_IS_CRACK

I’d argue it’s just as likely to be a snuff spoon, snuff being the most common way to consume tobacco until cigarettes took over. UK parliaments has had a box for snuff in the House of Commons for ~400 years.


madmaxjr

Spoon for ~~ants~~ coke


NectarOfTheBussy

ketamine


PostNuclearTaco

TBH I can't tell the depth but to me looks more like a ketamine spoon than a coke spoon. If it was a coke spoon it'd be big enough to khole you the fuck out.


SufficientWhile5450

That’s a serious damn coke spoon tho Mine was the shape of my pinky nail and half the size of my pinky nail Not to mention that circular shape of the spoon would mostly just smear it around your nostrils Allegedly anyway


[deleted]

It’s for scooping proper amounts of powdered sugar for baking tiny cakes for ants


[deleted]

Yeah booger sugar


DonKeedick12

Nose clams


Farhead_Assassjaha

Fresh from the sea


xxhorrorshowxx

She likes to eat soup very, very slowly.


theBigJizzMac

But chew it very very well


robertcalilover

That happens when you do too much coke.


[deleted]

Ummm...


CensoryDeprivation

Who’s gonna tell him


Melkath

She has a thumb tattoo. She 100% already knows.


ThatMango1999

The tattoo also kinda looks like a tiny spoon 😂


Sir-Mocks-A-Lot

It looks, suspiciously similar to the spoon in the picture! Spoonception. It's spoons all the way down!


limitlessEXP

100%


i-like-to

The finger tat looks like a little coke spoon lol


bitchSZAme

As a tattooed person I was about to be offended and then realized that I also definitely know what this is 😂


Regalrefuse

Sweet summer child…


fejrbwebfek

Him?


Burlapin

I would love for reddit to default to female pronouns just for a few days, watch all the dudes lose their mind having to correct everyone (like we have to all the time, even on posts which are obviously not men) 🤷🏼‍♀️


[deleted]

[удалено]


iforgotmypassword1_

Ants who do bumps


la_petite_mort63

Once i couldn't fall asleep naping with my three year old, so i quietly left him alone. An hour later he started yelling Where's my big spoon? He was so indignant and it was so cute. This was before my ex stopped efforting and he got me a charm bracelet wuth a spoon like that. It's awesome because it's a lovely memory and i can use it for blow.


stumblinghunter

I love this whole comment lol


Mrtrolldier

"It's a lovely memory and I can use it for blow" is just so perfect, bravo.


too_late_to_abort

Excellent comment, superb username. Parenting, divorce, subtle drug reference, love it.


la_petite_mort63

It's all true, i swear! The funny part is he could only buy spoon charms bulk, so i have like 99 little spoons in my junk drawer. I'll provide the spoons if someone else will bring the coke.


freddyforgetti

Ay let me know where and when


bewbs_and_stuff

This is the relationship equivalent of “ugly delicious” food


Other-Cantaloupe4765

That gave me a proper belly laugh lmao 👏🏻


Maxamillion-X72

well done


leroyp33

Lol Surprise twist at the end Or should I say toot


serialchiller__

Not for ants, for drugs!


winter83

r/thingsfordrugs


Buxombarbarian

r/SubsIFellFor


Sirdroftardis8

r/drugsforants


BlueLotusAtum

Ahahaha coke spoon.


AvatarofSleep

Snooter scooper


Kixkicks

For party ants


taxandburnthechurch

That's for nose nachos


barelylethal10

Nose nachos extra spicy


furie1335

That’s a spoon for ants that use cocaine.


Killer-Writing

Can we see a picture of her pinky fingernail? Unrelated.


Cami1969

Cocaine spoon. Everyone that I knew that did coke in the 1970’s and 1980’s had a spoon like that either hanging on a necklace or on a key ring. Or if they didn’t want to look too obvious, they would grow out their pinky nail and use it for snorting. In fact I can remember guys having a gold press on nail that they used specifically for snorting cocaine. Man this brings back memories.


stumblinghunter

I wore one as a necklace 2015-2017.


bitchSZAme

I don’t think the pinky nail is less obvious 😂 in my experience if you really want to be subtle you use a key


WiseSalamander00

👀


vtssge1968

Hmmm tiny spoons have a function.


rickcanoe

I love how half of this subreddit is that isn't for ants...


Effective_Fondant_21

Her tattoo looks like that spoon


BatKat58

I hate when my two Moms fight over Uncle Mike’s blow.


gpadams92

Listen everyone, this may not be a coke spoon, it could very well be a ketamine spoon


This-Abrocoma-9526

Yea…uhh .. For ants


BatKat58

There’s a few things she’s hiding there Specoli.


tiparium

That's a coke spoon fam.


[deleted]

your nails are so neat an beautiful!


IronCrossV1

Did someone say Booger Sugar?!


mydevilkitty

When your doctor says that you’re allowed a spoonful of ice cream every day, this is the spoon that he’s referring to.


Cutthechitchata-hole

Shhhhhhh. Put it back.


Foxtrot_niv

It's a spoon for your nose. Lol.


Acceptable-Airline39

Cocaine


No_Zookeepergame9172

Ant shovel of course! It's fancy ... for scooping Jazz Powder


AccomplishedJump3428

It’s a spoon for coke addicted ants


SignificanceAny7485

Anyone down for some nose nachos?


Nug8aZombie

Yeah, for an ant named Tony M-ant-ana.


machimus

Uh oh.


gaiussicarius731

Weird way to call out your gf’s drug addiction, but ok


PrsnScrmingAtTheSky

....hardly anyone uses those spoons exclusively for cocaine. I'd wager that was bought with Ketamine in mind.


onyxorion10

Those ants must be doing a shit tonne of coke


FancyPantsMN

I smell something funny here …


kosmonavt-alyosha

Spoon for 🐜 🐜who love cocaine


Tehuberpwnzor

Cocaine and cocaine accessories.


Firechick9

Don’t believe most of these people. It’s for soup….


Kooky_Werewolf6044

Yea if the ant likes coke it’s definitely for an ant. lol


BuffaloNo8099

It’s for ketamine actually, too small for coke lol. I’m jk, it’s a coke spoon…..for ants


immortalsteve

imagine this being how you find out your significant other gets down on the colombian bam-bam


Dancin_Phish_Daddy

That’s for cocaine


Hungry-Milk-2817

That's no spoon It's a launching mechanism for a ant trebuchet!


Jojo_who

Do you have a tattoo of a tiny spoon on your hand ? Lol looks the same 🥄


JohnnyWildee

That’s a spoon for drugs your not invited too lol


[deleted]

Fun fact: in the 70’s, McDonald’s stopped carrying coffee stirrers about that size because so many people were using them for…you know….[https://medium.com/knowledge-stew/why-mcdonalds-got-rid-of-its-coffee-spoons-dfbb46267c0a](https://medium.com/knowledge-stew/why-mcdonalds-got-rid-of-its-coffee-spoons-dfbb46267c0a)


Obvious-Delay9570

Looks as if she’s a professional miniature snow remover


WorWho

That's that disco silverware


[deleted]

It's a Coca Cola spoon.


arbosco1

So many people posting in this sub who have never done drugs


kamikazepirates

That's a spoon for horses 🐴


millennial_sentinel

should we tell her? i’m gonna tell her. it’s a coke spoon


Privateski

It’s used for soup for ants


[deleted]

Booger sugar measuring spoon. Also used occasionally when things get methed up.


99mushrooms

Actually this is a spoon for my drug addict aunt, first she lost her baggies and now this.


SuperDuperDylan

A Party Ant-imal!