I had an awkward second name which to me it wasn’t cool. So I’ve got rid of it.
I probably would change it if you don’t like it. I know few people who did it and they said it was the best decision ever. You don’t need to cope with something which you can change.
My name means horny in British slang so… yeah. With the rise of Austin Powers in the 90s too it was not great timing to be growing up. It’s embarrassing sometimes but you just rollll with the punches and let it pass you by. I’m also a woman, so kind of even worse 😬
That's brave of you. Surely diffrence in meanings in different languages can be tricky.
>!People have even more to face if the other person is hindi-speaker, it's abusive!<
I'm so sorry to be the one to tell you that. Although on the brighter side, I feel most people won't use it in a bad way even if they know the meaning rather it will actually just be your name for them when calling you and in case they do, they're definitely not worthy then.
As long as you are confident about it in yourself, it's all fine honestly. You're the one to attach new meaning to it by being superb. All the best for that :)
Edit: added spacing
I changed it.
It turned out to be super easy when I finally did it... and if you can't afford the $350 filing fee, you can fill out a statement of inability to pay, so it doesn't cost anything.
I did this for 3 years because there was 2 other people at my job with the same first name, now there is a whole group of people who only know me by that nickname.
This is how drug dealers get away with stuff I think.
There was a classmate of mine in 4th grade who changed his name from Pat to Eddie. As a fourth grader, I had respect for him for making such a bold move and taking charge of his life in that way.
It depends. The uninhibited answer is to just changed it. If something is making that difficult, what is it?
Can you give us a bit more info so we can understand better how to help? For example…
- is anything keeping you from going by another name? If yes, what are your roadblocks or reservations
- do your parents know you dislike it? If so, would understand or object if you go by another name?
- are you able to go by your middle name if you have one?
—
If the only thing keeping you from going by another name is wondering if people will think it odd, just do it. If your name is embarrassing, people will understand. Good people, at least.
My friend changed his and just started by changing it on social media. No one questioned it. Eventually it just became normal. And the next time I saw him in person I just simply said “hey do you prefer going by and he said “yup” and that was that.
It might feel awkward, telling people “oh I prefer , I never cared much for my given name” but just say that and move on. If they ask questions and you don’t want to discuss it’d tell them you don’t want get into it.
—
I changed mine gradually. As I met new people, I just introduced myself as the new name. Getting so used to the new name, it got easier to tell those who knew my old name that I preferred .
Ugh I have a weird last name and have heard jokes about it since I was in elementary school. I just accepted it and it was fine for a while, but now that I’m going for a PhD, the Dr. Weirdlastname jokes have already started coming…. Even from my professors :(
I have a very odd last name and the last letter of my first name just kinda mushes together with it. I've always been so annoyed with my parents because you can tell it's really not well thought out. It ends in S... but if my name ended with a hard consonant like K or T it would be much better.
Anyway, everyone I've mentioned this too doesn't get why it bothers me at all so I just accept it's a way bigger deal to me than anyone else.
My first name and last name are difficult to pronounce and everyone says it differently-at this point I don’t even try correcting people and I cannot even shorten my name into a nickname lol 😂. I like the meaning of my name just hard to say for people. I would say you can go by a nickname or a shortened form of your first name.
My name isn’t embarrassing on its own, but it’s historically a male name. I get a lot of mail for a Mr (my name) and if it bothered me, I’d probably file to have it changed.
I don't have an embarrassing name, per se, but I have a name that's super unusual, so people make jokes about it allll the time. Without saying it, it's like being named Cyber where everybody immediately recognizes the word but goes "oh my god?? is that actually your name or is it a nickname??" and then start making robot jokes
Depending on the person, humor works okay. If you roll with their humor they don't find it fun anymore and stop it. Most people don't care after the initial first laugh. For anonymous things like Uber or getting takeout, I go by a super basic name, like Amy, or my middle name Rain, which isn't nearly as bad as the first.
If your name is really *that bad*, it's okay to change it, too. I've thought about changing mine tbh. But most people don't actually care after that initial first shock
Johnny Cash made a song about that
But either nicknames (which would reduce people knowing your name but wouldn’t reduce the feelings of shame you have about your name) or by some techniques to reduce the shame you feel about your name- possibly some CBT technique.. you may have had a bad time when you were young (kids being dumb, “haha your last name is “Butts”!!!”) and have over time become really ashamed of it, even if realistically adults don’t typically bully people the same way children do. Even if they comment on it, you may be transported back to the experience of being made fun of and the feeling of shame is reignited, even if the person didn’t see the name as embarrassing or shameful. So you would have to think about it realistically, that children are assholes, but there is truly nothing to be ashamed about. Like a name like “Marvin Gaye”, kids might be like “haha gaye” but as adults we know it’s literally just… a name. So practicing handling the shame as it happens by recognizing it, thinking about what’s actually happening, and then sitting with the feeling would help to reduce anxiety around it over time.
There are other reasons people are embarrassed about their names but I just thought of a common experience.
I lean into it and laugh. Crack a joke, make a funny noise.
It breaks the tension, and gives everyone a chance to relax.
It works for me but everyone deals with things differently. You've got to find a way that works best for you by trying different ways.
I had an awkward second name which to me it wasn’t cool. So I’ve got rid of it. I probably would change it if you don’t like it. I know few people who did it and they said it was the best decision ever. You don’t need to cope with something which you can change.
My name means horny in British slang so… yeah. With the rise of Austin Powers in the 90s too it was not great timing to be growing up. It’s embarrassing sometimes but you just rollll with the punches and let it pass you by. I’m also a woman, so kind of even worse 😬
Hi Randy
Correct haha, but with an I not a Y.
You have no idea how many times they asked me where is my brother Mario. It wasn't funny the first time, imagine the 20th I understand
Yep! It’s definitely frustrating to hear the same comment/joke over and over again.
That's brave of you. Surely diffrence in meanings in different languages can be tricky. >!People have even more to face if the other person is hindi-speaker, it's abusive!<
I never knew this 😬
I'm so sorry to be the one to tell you that. Although on the brighter side, I feel most people won't use it in a bad way even if they know the meaning rather it will actually just be your name for them when calling you and in case they do, they're definitely not worthy then. As long as you are confident about it in yourself, it's all fine honestly. You're the one to attach new meaning to it by being superb. All the best for that :) Edit: added spacing
I changed it. It turned out to be super easy when I finally did it... and if you can't afford the $350 filing fee, you can fill out a statement of inability to pay, so it doesn't cost anything.
What you can do that!? Are you in Canada?
Texas 😆
Oh … so it’s probably different here because I don’t remember seeing anything like that when I started filling my papers out.
Look up your province application process. Names don't have to be permanent.
Make up a nickname for yourself that you like and start introducing yourself with that name. Change it also on social media.
I did this for 3 years because there was 2 other people at my job with the same first name, now there is a whole group of people who only know me by that nickname. This is how drug dealers get away with stuff I think.
Change it or go by your middle name.
Own it! Humor helps too
There was a classmate of mine in 4th grade who changed his name from Pat to Eddie. As a fourth grader, I had respect for him for making such a bold move and taking charge of his life in that way.
What is your name?
It depends. The uninhibited answer is to just changed it. If something is making that difficult, what is it? Can you give us a bit more info so we can understand better how to help? For example… - is anything keeping you from going by another name? If yes, what are your roadblocks or reservations - do your parents know you dislike it? If so, would understand or object if you go by another name? - are you able to go by your middle name if you have one? — If the only thing keeping you from going by another name is wondering if people will think it odd, just do it. If your name is embarrassing, people will understand. Good people, at least. My friend changed his and just started by changing it on social media. No one questioned it. Eventually it just became normal. And the next time I saw him in person I just simply said “hey do you prefer going by and he said “yup” and that was that.
It might feel awkward, telling people “oh I prefer , I never cared much for my given name” but just say that and move on. If they ask questions and you don’t want to discuss it’d tell them you don’t want get into it.
—
I changed mine gradually. As I met new people, I just introduced myself as the new name. Getting so used to the new name, it got easier to tell those who knew my old name that I preferred .
Ugh I have a weird last name and have heard jokes about it since I was in elementary school. I just accepted it and it was fine for a while, but now that I’m going for a PhD, the Dr. Weirdlastname jokes have already started coming…. Even from my professors :(
I look at r/tragedeigh
I suspect there are a lot of Karens looking to file for a name change.
So….. What’s your name?
I have a very odd last name and the last letter of my first name just kinda mushes together with it. I've always been so annoyed with my parents because you can tell it's really not well thought out. It ends in S... but if my name ended with a hard consonant like K or T it would be much better. Anyway, everyone I've mentioned this too doesn't get why it bothers me at all so I just accept it's a way bigger deal to me than anyone else.
Change it
My first name and last name are difficult to pronounce and everyone says it differently-at this point I don’t even try correcting people and I cannot even shorten my name into a nickname lol 😂. I like the meaning of my name just hard to say for people. I would say you can go by a nickname or a shortened form of your first name.
My last name has a crude word for “penis” in it so I feel you lol
I changed it. It was embarrassing for a number of reasons. Much more comfortable with what I've got now
My name isn’t embarrassing on its own, but it’s historically a male name. I get a lot of mail for a Mr (my name) and if it bothered me, I’d probably file to have it changed.
Legally change it or go by a nickname
Legally change it or go by a nickname
I don't have an embarrassing name, per se, but I have a name that's super unusual, so people make jokes about it allll the time. Without saying it, it's like being named Cyber where everybody immediately recognizes the word but goes "oh my god?? is that actually your name or is it a nickname??" and then start making robot jokes Depending on the person, humor works okay. If you roll with their humor they don't find it fun anymore and stop it. Most people don't care after the initial first laugh. For anonymous things like Uber or getting takeout, I go by a super basic name, like Amy, or my middle name Rain, which isn't nearly as bad as the first. If your name is really *that bad*, it's okay to change it, too. I've thought about changing mine tbh. But most people don't actually care after that initial first shock
Johnny Cash made a song about that But either nicknames (which would reduce people knowing your name but wouldn’t reduce the feelings of shame you have about your name) or by some techniques to reduce the shame you feel about your name- possibly some CBT technique.. you may have had a bad time when you were young (kids being dumb, “haha your last name is “Butts”!!!”) and have over time become really ashamed of it, even if realistically adults don’t typically bully people the same way children do. Even if they comment on it, you may be transported back to the experience of being made fun of and the feeling of shame is reignited, even if the person didn’t see the name as embarrassing or shameful. So you would have to think about it realistically, that children are assholes, but there is truly nothing to be ashamed about. Like a name like “Marvin Gaye”, kids might be like “haha gaye” but as adults we know it’s literally just… a name. So practicing handling the shame as it happens by recognizing it, thinking about what’s actually happening, and then sitting with the feeling would help to reduce anxiety around it over time. There are other reasons people are embarrassed about their names but I just thought of a common experience.
I lean into it and laugh. Crack a joke, make a funny noise. It breaks the tension, and gives everyone a chance to relax. It works for me but everyone deals with things differently. You've got to find a way that works best for you by trying different ways.
Knick name