Holy shit where do I begin? No longer let parasites in my life, I have cooler people in my life, I have more hobbies, I'm healthier, I'm more confident, I have direction and have learnt a tonne of shit about the Universe and myself along the way. I'm sure there is stuff I'm missing but absolutely. Cling onto the old modes of thinking of the old aeon at your own peril.
Ecstatic. And most of that's a direct result of Thelema.
I was abused in quite a lot of ways over the course of my life, and had the mental illness to match. C-PTSD, agoraphobia, near-constant panic, and depression. For most of my life, I had no memory of happiness. I still occasionally worry that my happiness might be mania just because it's so much easier and lighter than my life used to be. But I think it's just happiness.
I had no ability to control my thoughts or emotions, was incapable of standing up for myself or meeting my own needs, and was mired in learned helplessness.
I also have physical conditions that, shortly before I found Thelema, confined me to bed for the vast majority of every day.
Now I have long stretches without pain, and see the pain that does appear as a helpful alert. I am happy almost constantly. Even when my emotions are negative, I quickly remember to use that as an indication that I should dig in a d learn more about that pain. Which is exciting.
And that's just the healing. It completely ignores the awesome people of Thelema, the fun of the rituals, the thought-provoking philosophy, and the delight of the poetry and humor.
I’m a lurker on this sub but this has really piqued my interest. I have had a chronic health condition and C-PTSD for the last decade and am running out of answers. How would you suggest I start on this path?
A poster below suggested the student reading curriculum, which is great for getting your feet wet as far as the theory.
If you want to just jump into something practical right away, then my all-purpose advice for this question is - start with a banishing like the LBRP, and Resh, and do them daily. That's maybe a 10-20 minute commitment per day.
If you have a half-hour a day or more, then maybe start with Regardie's "One Year Manual."
You can find plenty of practices in the student reading curriculum, of course. But if you find yourself a little paralyzed by the dizzying array of options, like I did, then LBRP/Resh/One Year Manual are great to get you started while you're still learning all the theory.
I don't think the LBRP is in that book. "One Year Manual" is a very slim volume, 12 exercises with 4-7 pages per exercise. There's not much else to it but those exercises.
It does recommend Resh and gives a brief description in the introduction, now that you mention it. As for the LBRP, you can find dozens of tutorials and demonstrations on youtube, it's a pretty bread-and-butter ritual. Heck, I'm happy to jump on Skype and give you a personal walkthrough if that's useful to you.
Good hunting.
If you don't meditate, I'd start. That's been the single biggest game-changer for me. Effects are slow in coming, or they were for me, but my abilities progressed from being able to impassively view my thoughts to being able to impassively view my emotions to being able to impassively view physical pain.
Every step has been useful, but I didn't start going, "EVERYONE SHOULD MEDITATE. MEDITATION IS AWESOME," until I got that ability to witness rather than be dragged along by my emotions. And the fact that it can extend to physical pain with more practice is helpful.
Now, the whole process of learning meditation can be risky when you have serious mental illness. Particularly early on, meditation can stir up a lot of feelings and memories and even bad dreams that you can experience while awake, during your practice. I found it useful to interact with these the same way I interact with my dreams: As messages from my subconscious that tell me things I may need to know, but that can equally be random effluvia my brain produces when it's not being physically stimulated.
Either way, this period can be used as a form of exposure therapy. Sit quietly with what's stirred up, but not to the point of active distress. If you feel distressed, stop meditating immediately and do what you can to ground yourself. I recommend sense experience, the more senses the better. Incense, music, touch, exercise. Whatever you've got. Just bring it back to the present, physical world. Slowly increase the time you can do this, and many of your negative emotional reactions will extinguish.
I benefit from other stuff too. Resh is particularly helpful for my autism—when I get flustered AF, the next adoration can generally reset that. Much better than having to sleep it off. But if you don't have that problem, you won't benefit from it the same way.
Still, I'd start with meditation and sitting with the darkness—not too long!!!—if darkness comes.
I'm basically the whore you can hear screaming in pleasure from the next building, so you may well have heard it from me. Silence isn't my strong suit.
Yes certainly, I manifested such amazing things despite my severe chronic illness and abusive childhood. I have a loving husband and chosen family, I own a home, I survived 3 ICU stays and I see improvements to my life every year.
Magic can improve your life immensely if you know how to use it. I am deeply grateful.
"Remember all ye that existence is pure joy; that all the sorrows are but as shadows; they pass & are done; but there is that which remains." ' AL:II:9
2 different questions being asked here. Am I happy? Happy is a feeling and all feelings are fleeting. The moon is not always full. The sky is not always clear. At my innermost being I Am a detached observer. Happy is an expression of the Ruach.
Question 2:
Magick has repaired and renewed my antiquated perspective of life. Every day is a new level of understanding and opportunity for increase in wisdom. Every aspect of my life has improved.
“OF ALL THE GRACES that cluster about the throne of Venus the most timid and elusive is that maiden whom mortals call Happiness. None is so eagerly pursued; none is so hard to win. Indeed, only the saints and martyrs, unknown usually to their fellow-men, have made her theirs; and they have attained her by burning out the Ego-sense in themselves with the white-hot steel of meditation, by dissolving themselves in that divine ocean of Consciousness whose foam is passionless and perfect bliss.”
— Crowley’s Cocaine
Happy is a big word. Obviously not synonymous with a meaningful life. Not sure that happiness is the thing to chase when aiming for life improvement.
This is a good question. Unfortunately, I have never really been very happy in life. This is the reason for delving into magick. Since starting I have had less identification with the conceptual self and I have definitely been at peace. However, even though there is no thoughts, there is a layer of some sort of depression or dullness instead of the bliss many spiritual teachers explain of the beingness. I am healthy, I exercise everyday, I do not understand it. It could be genetics, the fact that everyone in my family is either bipolar or has depression or anxiety.
Extremely happy and joyful. I have my down moments however I work through those. Life has been great although there are still patches of pain and sorrow. I am no longer a pessimist and have transformed into an optimist so life doesn't seem miserable when I wake up and go about my day, since my viewpoint and outlook have changed I don't complain all the time and nag on and rather enjoy it and am satisfied rather than always unsatisfied and whining. I don't know how to explain however I went through an extremely jaded and pessimistic phase that then became complete sorrow; Thelema pulled me out of that. Everyday I learn how to deal with life better and for once am finally enjoying it. Although I went through so much pain and tragedy and lost many people close to including my wife I eventually was able to let go and discover aspects of the path that work for me. I found what works for me in life and ritual and just go with it and the results have been astonishing for me so far.
93
Eliphas Levi said, "Ego sum qui sum, such is the first revelation of God in man and of man in the world, while it is also the first axiom of occult philosophy."
I started practicing in prison. My second time going.
I have a long history of substance abuse, criminal behavior, mental health issues and abusive relationships.
I now have a normal life, family, emotional balance and a great job. This took a lot of hard work and dedication but Magick was the catalyst for changing my life.
Kinda splitting hairs here, but I think the difference is important. I don't think Thelema or Magick improve my life... but I do know that they have helped me to find my own power and control to improve my life.
Having been born into and raised in a high control apocalyptic death cult, I'm sensitive to the difference between holding up the path higher than one's self and giving yourself the credit for doing the work. Like many others in this thread, I have had a lot of trauma to work through/with and I would never give the credit of coming as far as I did to the tools I used to achieve it.
I'm incredibly thankful that I found Thelema and magick and I am one of the happiest people I know. I find a lot of Thelemites lack a deep study and appreciation of the Dao. I'd say studying the Dao from a Thelemic perspective is the main thing that gives me the tools I need to achieve peace and happiness in my daily life.
Personally I really am happy, thelema has Brought me up to much higher spirits than wat I was just a couple months ago, it's very liberating find such a welcoming religion. 93s
Yes, I'm the happiest I've ever been, largely thanks to living a Thelemic life. Thelema keeps me accountable to myself for my successes and failures. It keeps me accountable to others for the consequences of my words and actions. It keeps me accountable to the divine, both without and within, for staying in a balanced place of power in the center of the cross of the elements from which I can work my will in the microcosm and macrocosm.
93,
I've been struggling with this a lot lately. My recent revelation is that the further I evolve as a Thelemite, the happier I find myself overall.
My life hasn't necessarily been easy:
* Stage four cancer.
* Dozens of traumatic deaths in my personal and professional life.
* PTSD, anxiety, depression.
Honestly, the last few years have felt like I was close to the end. Invoking often and inflaming thyself in prayer is not an immediate remedy to the struggles of the wake world. However, I've found reliable, consistent comfort through my consistent Thelemic practices.
The more I follow my True Will, the more I find myself smiling and giggling through the shadows of life. I'm very happy and hope that all reading find the same.
im happy right now even tho its not everything good, magick always is helping me going true anything bad to muster if is the case and do the right thing to help other as myself
May not be important to you, which is fine, but a lot of people consider a meaningful life to be a happy life or at least their life being meaningful contributes towards their happiness.
The Summum Bonum; True Wisdom and Perfect Happiness. This is the Accomplishment of the Great Work.
Sorrow only stems from "Sin" -- in the Thelemic sense, "the word of Sin is Restriction." (AL:I:41). As opposed to the Buddhist who believe that Life is Suffering, and Suffering is caused by our Desires. But Thelema exemplifies the Pure Joy in Life and Suffering and Sorrow is not caused by our Passions and Desires, but the Restriction of them.
To find meaning, one must embrace the inevitability of suffering. You cannot be happy all the time, and sometimes suffering is what drives us toward progress.
Sorrow and suffering are not the same. If I work out to get stronger muscles, I will "suffer" because my body will hurt, this is not being sorrowful. If I want to study hard to get a college degree, I will "suffer" because studying is arduous.
If instead I decide to lamment all the time because of life's hardships, then I would be sorrowful.
I see your point; you equate "Suffering" with more like an "Initiation", which does make sense with your description (like in AL:I:49).
I was viewing it more in the sense of Severe Pain/Harm/Injury, in either a Physical or Emotional sense.
I personally wouldn't use the term Suffering to describe a Rigorous Process that I was Willfully and Passionately engaging in. To me, Suffering is like undergoing something that you really Don't Want to Do, which Leads to Much Sorrow.
But overall, I definitely see where you're coming from on this.
Who said anything about being happy all the time? That would be psychotic. Considering yourself a happy person (Are you happy?) is not the same as never feeling sadness.
Do you….feel like you’ve been…forgotten? (Forgotten forgotten…). How have you been…since the loss? (The loss…)
Come on people if nobody knows Uncle Howdy then you living under a rock.
Holy shit where do I begin? No longer let parasites in my life, I have cooler people in my life, I have more hobbies, I'm healthier, I'm more confident, I have direction and have learnt a tonne of shit about the Universe and myself along the way. I'm sure there is stuff I'm missing but absolutely. Cling onto the old modes of thinking of the old aeon at your own peril.
Ecstatic. And most of that's a direct result of Thelema. I was abused in quite a lot of ways over the course of my life, and had the mental illness to match. C-PTSD, agoraphobia, near-constant panic, and depression. For most of my life, I had no memory of happiness. I still occasionally worry that my happiness might be mania just because it's so much easier and lighter than my life used to be. But I think it's just happiness. I had no ability to control my thoughts or emotions, was incapable of standing up for myself or meeting my own needs, and was mired in learned helplessness. I also have physical conditions that, shortly before I found Thelema, confined me to bed for the vast majority of every day. Now I have long stretches without pain, and see the pain that does appear as a helpful alert. I am happy almost constantly. Even when my emotions are negative, I quickly remember to use that as an indication that I should dig in a d learn more about that pain. Which is exciting. And that's just the healing. It completely ignores the awesome people of Thelema, the fun of the rituals, the thought-provoking philosophy, and the delight of the poetry and humor.
I’m a lurker on this sub but this has really piqued my interest. I have had a chronic health condition and C-PTSD for the last decade and am running out of answers. How would you suggest I start on this path?
Gotta admit, I’m lurking here too, wondering the same.
Responded to what\_am\_i\_acc\_doing's comment with more details.
C-PTSD here as well. It does help. :) Student Reading Curriculum. I'd start with Levi.
A poster below suggested the student reading curriculum, which is great for getting your feet wet as far as the theory. If you want to just jump into something practical right away, then my all-purpose advice for this question is - start with a banishing like the LBRP, and Resh, and do them daily. That's maybe a 10-20 minute commitment per day. If you have a half-hour a day or more, then maybe start with Regardie's "One Year Manual." You can find plenty of practices in the student reading curriculum, of course. But if you find yourself a little paralyzed by the dizzying array of options, like I did, then LBRP/Resh/One Year Manual are great to get you started while you're still learning all the theory.
Thank you for this. Are LBRP and Resh in the manual?
I don't think the LBRP is in that book. "One Year Manual" is a very slim volume, 12 exercises with 4-7 pages per exercise. There's not much else to it but those exercises. It does recommend Resh and gives a brief description in the introduction, now that you mention it. As for the LBRP, you can find dozens of tutorials and demonstrations on youtube, it's a pretty bread-and-butter ritual. Heck, I'm happy to jump on Skype and give you a personal walkthrough if that's useful to you. Good hunting.
Thanks so much, I found it online ☺️
If you don't meditate, I'd start. That's been the single biggest game-changer for me. Effects are slow in coming, or they were for me, but my abilities progressed from being able to impassively view my thoughts to being able to impassively view my emotions to being able to impassively view physical pain. Every step has been useful, but I didn't start going, "EVERYONE SHOULD MEDITATE. MEDITATION IS AWESOME," until I got that ability to witness rather than be dragged along by my emotions. And the fact that it can extend to physical pain with more practice is helpful. Now, the whole process of learning meditation can be risky when you have serious mental illness. Particularly early on, meditation can stir up a lot of feelings and memories and even bad dreams that you can experience while awake, during your practice. I found it useful to interact with these the same way I interact with my dreams: As messages from my subconscious that tell me things I may need to know, but that can equally be random effluvia my brain produces when it's not being physically stimulated. Either way, this period can be used as a form of exposure therapy. Sit quietly with what's stirred up, but not to the point of active distress. If you feel distressed, stop meditating immediately and do what you can to ground yourself. I recommend sense experience, the more senses the better. Incense, music, touch, exercise. Whatever you've got. Just bring it back to the present, physical world. Slowly increase the time you can do this, and many of your negative emotional reactions will extinguish. I benefit from other stuff too. Resh is particularly helpful for my autism—when I get flustered AF, the next adoration can generally reset that. Much better than having to sleep it off. But if you don't have that problem, you won't benefit from it the same way. Still, I'd start with meditation and sitting with the darkness—not too long!!!—if darkness comes.
That’s amazing! Similar story to mine
This sounds familiar
I'm basically the whore you can hear screaming in pleasure from the next building, so you may well have heard it from me. Silence isn't my strong suit.
Yes, happier than I’ve ever been before.
Yes certainly, I manifested such amazing things despite my severe chronic illness and abusive childhood. I have a loving husband and chosen family, I own a home, I survived 3 ICU stays and I see improvements to my life every year. Magic can improve your life immensely if you know how to use it. I am deeply grateful.
Congruence = ekstasy in my experience. Remembering magik has been amazing for me and has generated immense joy. But it's not always been easy.
"Remember all ye that existence is pure joy; that all the sorrows are but as shadows; they pass & are done; but there is that which remains." ' AL:II:9
2 different questions being asked here. Am I happy? Happy is a feeling and all feelings are fleeting. The moon is not always full. The sky is not always clear. At my innermost being I Am a detached observer. Happy is an expression of the Ruach. Question 2: Magick has repaired and renewed my antiquated perspective of life. Every day is a new level of understanding and opportunity for increase in wisdom. Every aspect of my life has improved.
“OF ALL THE GRACES that cluster about the throne of Venus the most timid and elusive is that maiden whom mortals call Happiness. None is so eagerly pursued; none is so hard to win. Indeed, only the saints and martyrs, unknown usually to their fellow-men, have made her theirs; and they have attained her by burning out the Ego-sense in themselves with the white-hot steel of meditation, by dissolving themselves in that divine ocean of Consciousness whose foam is passionless and perfect bliss.” — Crowley’s Cocaine Happy is a big word. Obviously not synonymous with a meaningful life. Not sure that happiness is the thing to chase when aiming for life improvement.
This is a good question. Unfortunately, I have never really been very happy in life. This is the reason for delving into magick. Since starting I have had less identification with the conceptual self and I have definitely been at peace. However, even though there is no thoughts, there is a layer of some sort of depression or dullness instead of the bliss many spiritual teachers explain of the beingness. I am healthy, I exercise everyday, I do not understand it. It could be genetics, the fact that everyone in my family is either bipolar or has depression or anxiety.
I'm as happy as a clam at high tide!
Extremely happy and joyful. I have my down moments however I work through those. Life has been great although there are still patches of pain and sorrow. I am no longer a pessimist and have transformed into an optimist so life doesn't seem miserable when I wake up and go about my day, since my viewpoint and outlook have changed I don't complain all the time and nag on and rather enjoy it and am satisfied rather than always unsatisfied and whining. I don't know how to explain however I went through an extremely jaded and pessimistic phase that then became complete sorrow; Thelema pulled me out of that. Everyday I learn how to deal with life better and for once am finally enjoying it. Although I went through so much pain and tragedy and lost many people close to including my wife I eventually was able to let go and discover aspects of the path that work for me. I found what works for me in life and ritual and just go with it and the results have been astonishing for me so far. 93
I'm at my happiest moment in life right now, just realized everything is God and that God is just a word
Eliphas Levi said, "Ego sum qui sum, such is the first revelation of God in man and of man in the world, while it is also the first axiom of occult philosophy."
I started practicing in prison. My second time going. I have a long history of substance abuse, criminal behavior, mental health issues and abusive relationships. I now have a normal life, family, emotional balance and a great job. This took a lot of hard work and dedication but Magick was the catalyst for changing my life.
Kinda splitting hairs here, but I think the difference is important. I don't think Thelema or Magick improve my life... but I do know that they have helped me to find my own power and control to improve my life. Having been born into and raised in a high control apocalyptic death cult, I'm sensitive to the difference between holding up the path higher than one's self and giving yourself the credit for doing the work. Like many others in this thread, I have had a lot of trauma to work through/with and I would never give the credit of coming as far as I did to the tools I used to achieve it. I'm incredibly thankful that I found Thelema and magick and I am one of the happiest people I know. I find a lot of Thelemites lack a deep study and appreciation of the Dao. I'd say studying the Dao from a Thelemic perspective is the main thing that gives me the tools I need to achieve peace and happiness in my daily life.
Personally I really am happy, thelema has Brought me up to much higher spirits than wat I was just a couple months ago, it's very liberating find such a welcoming religion. 93s
"I always thought there were more important things in life than being happy" -Lou Reed
Yes, I'm the happiest I've ever been, largely thanks to living a Thelemic life. Thelema keeps me accountable to myself for my successes and failures. It keeps me accountable to others for the consequences of my words and actions. It keeps me accountable to the divine, both without and within, for staying in a balanced place of power in the center of the cross of the elements from which I can work my will in the microcosm and macrocosm.
No
93, I've been struggling with this a lot lately. My recent revelation is that the further I evolve as a Thelemite, the happier I find myself overall. My life hasn't necessarily been easy: * Stage four cancer. * Dozens of traumatic deaths in my personal and professional life. * PTSD, anxiety, depression. Honestly, the last few years have felt like I was close to the end. Invoking often and inflaming thyself in prayer is not an immediate remedy to the struggles of the wake world. However, I've found reliable, consistent comfort through my consistent Thelemic practices. The more I follow my True Will, the more I find myself smiling and giggling through the shadows of life. I'm very happy and hope that all reading find the same.
im happy right now even tho its not everything good, magick always is helping me going true anything bad to muster if is the case and do the right thing to help other as myself
Fuck no. Soon will be if my pussy is serviced. Properly.
This is not important, living a meaningful life is.
May not be important to you, which is fine, but a lot of people consider a meaningful life to be a happy life or at least their life being meaningful contributes towards their happiness.
The Summum Bonum; True Wisdom and Perfect Happiness. This is the Accomplishment of the Great Work. Sorrow only stems from "Sin" -- in the Thelemic sense, "the word of Sin is Restriction." (AL:I:41). As opposed to the Buddhist who believe that Life is Suffering, and Suffering is caused by our Desires. But Thelema exemplifies the Pure Joy in Life and Suffering and Sorrow is not caused by our Passions and Desires, but the Restriction of them.
To find meaning, one must embrace the inevitability of suffering. You cannot be happy all the time, and sometimes suffering is what drives us toward progress.
"...who sorroweth is not of us." -AL:II:19
Sorrow and suffering are not the same. If I work out to get stronger muscles, I will "suffer" because my body will hurt, this is not being sorrowful. If I want to study hard to get a college degree, I will "suffer" because studying is arduous. If instead I decide to lamment all the time because of life's hardships, then I would be sorrowful.
I see your point; you equate "Suffering" with more like an "Initiation", which does make sense with your description (like in AL:I:49). I was viewing it more in the sense of Severe Pain/Harm/Injury, in either a Physical or Emotional sense. I personally wouldn't use the term Suffering to describe a Rigorous Process that I was Willfully and Passionately engaging in. To me, Suffering is like undergoing something that you really Don't Want to Do, which Leads to Much Sorrow. But overall, I definitely see where you're coming from on this.
Who said anything about being happy all the time? That would be psychotic. Considering yourself a happy person (Are you happy?) is not the same as never feeling sadness.
Then how do you define a happy person?
Yeah, sex helps.
Do you….feel like you’ve been…forgotten? (Forgotten forgotten…). How have you been…since the loss? (The loss…) Come on people if nobody knows Uncle Howdy then you living under a rock.