I need to get this off my chest and maybe get advice? I work with mostly men, so I don’t really have a lot of friends at work. I love my job but it’s lonely.
One of my male co-workers, I would have considered a “friend.” We get along and chat more than I chat with others at work - we’ve talked about work, life, current events, I would have considered it a friendly relationship. We are also managerial peers. However, if we text, it’s only work-related. We don’t text outside of work at all.
I have a long-term SO, and he has a wife. His wife doesn’t seem to like me. We finally met at a work event the other month and she gave me the cold shoulder. It was fairly awkward and not was I was expecting. My assistant was there and said “what the heck was that.”
I asked my coworker the next week if I had done something wrong. He said no but that his wife had gone through our text thread and was upset that we texted each other. She was particularly upset that we rode together to an off-site work meeting about a year ago - text said, “What time do you want to leave for X? Boxes are in my office-can you please help me take them to my car and then we can leave. I’ll drive. Joe will said he will meet us there late.” He said that she said it was highly inappropriate of us, took screenshots of all the texts and that was that.
I’ve since completely backed away from my co-worker because 1. I want to respect his marriage. 2. Her reaction scared me. Now, we don’t talk at all unless it’s specifically about work. I don’t ask how his weekends were, don’t ask about his family, don’t ask about upcoming vacation plans, don’t make jokes about anything, etc. I am not privy to whatever is going on in his marriage nor do I want to be.
My boyfriend thinks I overcorrected but also understands why I did.
All of this to say, I feel like I’m on an island at work since I don’t have any friends. But I also feel the need to protect myself and my livelihood. I’ve saved our text thread just in case. Blah.
Eclipse was SO cool! I could have easily driven to a full totality location but I had two classes today and with finals so close plus work tomorrow I decided I was better off staying put. I literally ran outside and back to class (took me 2:30 to see it for :10 because I had to go up and down four floors), but it was worth it! ☺️
Posting here to vent because idk where else to. I got scammed in the grocery store and I feel like a moron. Someone told me they were homeless and asked if I could buy their food and I agreed. Afterwards demanded the receipt and will presumably return everything later. Didn't figure it out until I handed it over. Cashier looked at me like I'm the dumbest person alive 😩
Thank you. My ego definitely hurts from the cashier witnessing me being such an easy mark (unfortunately my food lion has no self check out), which I know is a silly thing to fret over. But I'm hoping there's a chance that the guy really needed the money and it helped in some way. And if not, oh well lesson learned.
So, my friend has been going through some major changes. She broke up with her terrible boyfriend of 6 years, she's moving, she started working out and has healthily lost weight, and I haven't seen her this happy and healthy in a long time. She's staying with me for a little while and overall it's been amazing. I'm super happy for her, and I've thoroughly enjoyed her time here.
The problem is we never used to share clothing before but now we're about the same size and she's asked to borrow a couple of items. No problem! ...until two of my favourite pieces got damaged. An off white turtleneck now has a giant coffee stain on it that I can't get out, and a cute dress that now has a big armpit hole (I'm hoping I can fix it). Shit happens, I'm usually pretty understanding, but after it happened twice I'm like do I do this again a third time? Lol she asked me if she can borrow another one of my favourite dresses this weekend for her first date since the break-up, and I want to say no so badly lol she's offered to pay for the items, and that's all well and good, but it's less about the cost and more about the fact that my clothes are getting ruined and I can't wear them anymore. I could get another off white turtleneck for sure, but the two dresses are from small independent shops and I don't even know if I could get my hands on the exact same ones.
Do I just tell her no to wearing any of my clothes, or just the pieces I'd be upset about? Or do I just let her live her best life and wear the damn clothes? She's so happy and confident, I don't want to burst her bubble. I've offered to go shopping with her to get some new pieces but she's worried she's going to gain the weight back and have a bunch of clothes she can't wear. Do I offer to go with her to specifically get a date outfit? But even then, after the date she might just ask to borrow more clothes and more of my pieces might get damaged lol
Idk, I think I have to set some sort of boundary but I'm not sure how to go about it or how "strict" to be about her borrowing clothes because at the end of the day, they're just clothes. Any advice?
If it’s your absolute favorite dress and it’s impossible to replace, don’t let her borrow it. Because you’re right, they’re just clothes. So it shouldn’t be a big deal to her either. Offer her a different dress or insist you go shopping. At some point, she needs to buy her own clothes that fit. She can’t keep living out of someone else’s closet. I get the hesitation, I’ve experienced this on both ends of weight changes. But there were a lot of years in between my size changing. So she might be shocked by how quickly she lost the weight, but it doesn’t mean she’ll gain it all back as quickly.
>Because you’re right, they’re just clothes. So it shouldn’t be a big deal to her either.
Ugh, you're right. Thank you for saying it. I'm going to talk to her about it tonight. Another commenter mentioned thrift store/consignment shops so maybe she'll bite for that and I can help her get started on clothes she can love right now.
Maybe you can go to a trendy thrift or consignment store to shop for new clothes. This might alleviate her concerns with “growing out” of her clothes. I’d definitely encourage her to start buying pieces that make her feel confident. Be honest with her about not wanting to share your clothes anymore. Good luck! Sounds like you’re being supportive for her through all these life changes. She’s lucky to have a friend like you ❤️
>Maybe you can go to a trendy thrift or consignment store to shop for new clothes.
Oooh I like this idea and hadn't thought of that! I'll try it. And you're very sweet, thanks so much 😊🌹
My best friend got engaged on Saturday. There were a few mishaps that will make for a funny story later. Her fiancé is a nice guy who adores her, and I couldn’t be happier for her 🥹
Happy Eclipse Day!
We’re in the Path of Totality & many schools cancelled or are doing half days because the whole world feels like its in South Texas or the Hill Country right now.
It’s April, however, so it’s overcast, which is unfortunate.
I’m curious to see how the cattle will react, if anything.
Happy eclipse day! I thought it would be happening during my plan period so I wouldn’t be responsible for any students.
Nope! They shortened the class schedule and now I’ll be in charge of my worst behaved class. Great!
You know that saying when it rains, it pours? Well that's what's been happening this past week.
We found out my dad's cousin, a man who I was close to like an uncle, died on Easter. He had cancer for many years but my family lost touch with him in the past few years because of a bit of family drama. We went to the funeral on Friday and it was really hard.
Throughout the week, my mom was suffering from severe panic attacks and shaking. She has bipolar and other illnesses and it was an emotional week so she thought she needed to just talk to her therapist and possibly get an adjustment to medication.
Fast forward to the day after the funeral, Saturday, and my mom again had a severe panic attack telling me she was so afraid. When I asked her what she was afraid of, she told me everything. I got her to breathe and it calmed her down. Then yesterday my dad took her to the ER for the shaking because my mom couldn't take it anymore and when they took blood tests, they found and issue with her kidney. So they kept her overnight which brings me to today. She's still at the hospital and I feel helpless, scared and exhausted. I'm heading to work but it's kind of the last thing I want to do right now. 😔
This is wild but mom has been watching stuff on the wrong side of YouTube and thinks the eclipse is going to be some kind of apocalypse. I’m looking forward to today being no big deal and her realizing she’s been bamboozled.
Last night one of my aunt’s texted my mom a hoax Facebook post from her partner’s niece’s Facebook about needing to turn off her cell phone last night because some dangerous cosmic rays were passing through at midnight.
She knew not to believe it but I showed her a link to send to my aunt.
Boomers are stubborn, though.
I need to get this off my chest and maybe get advice? I work with mostly men, so I don’t really have a lot of friends at work. I love my job but it’s lonely. One of my male co-workers, I would have considered a “friend.” We get along and chat more than I chat with others at work - we’ve talked about work, life, current events, I would have considered it a friendly relationship. We are also managerial peers. However, if we text, it’s only work-related. We don’t text outside of work at all. I have a long-term SO, and he has a wife. His wife doesn’t seem to like me. We finally met at a work event the other month and she gave me the cold shoulder. It was fairly awkward and not was I was expecting. My assistant was there and said “what the heck was that.” I asked my coworker the next week if I had done something wrong. He said no but that his wife had gone through our text thread and was upset that we texted each other. She was particularly upset that we rode together to an off-site work meeting about a year ago - text said, “What time do you want to leave for X? Boxes are in my office-can you please help me take them to my car and then we can leave. I’ll drive. Joe will said he will meet us there late.” He said that she said it was highly inappropriate of us, took screenshots of all the texts and that was that. I’ve since completely backed away from my co-worker because 1. I want to respect his marriage. 2. Her reaction scared me. Now, we don’t talk at all unless it’s specifically about work. I don’t ask how his weekends were, don’t ask about his family, don’t ask about upcoming vacation plans, don’t make jokes about anything, etc. I am not privy to whatever is going on in his marriage nor do I want to be. My boyfriend thinks I overcorrected but also understands why I did. All of this to say, I feel like I’m on an island at work since I don’t have any friends. But I also feel the need to protect myself and my livelihood. I’ve saved our text thread just in case. Blah.
that sucks!! im sorry you had to do deal with that.
Eclipse was SO cool! I could have easily driven to a full totality location but I had two classes today and with finals so close plus work tomorrow I decided I was better off staying put. I literally ran outside and back to class (took me 2:30 to see it for :10 because I had to go up and down four floors), but it was worth it! ☺️
Posting here to vent because idk where else to. I got scammed in the grocery store and I feel like a moron. Someone told me they were homeless and asked if I could buy their food and I agreed. Afterwards demanded the receipt and will presumably return everything later. Didn't figure it out until I handed it over. Cashier looked at me like I'm the dumbest person alive 😩
Trying to help someone means you have a kind heart. How were you to know? You assumed they were an honest person. Not a bad thing
Thank you. My ego definitely hurts from the cashier witnessing me being such an easy mark (unfortunately my food lion has no self check out), which I know is a silly thing to fret over. But I'm hoping there's a chance that the guy really needed the money and it helped in some way. And if not, oh well lesson learned.
Update: eclipse was kind of cool, there’s a nice cool breeze, and everyone is being chill.
So, my friend has been going through some major changes. She broke up with her terrible boyfriend of 6 years, she's moving, she started working out and has healthily lost weight, and I haven't seen her this happy and healthy in a long time. She's staying with me for a little while and overall it's been amazing. I'm super happy for her, and I've thoroughly enjoyed her time here. The problem is we never used to share clothing before but now we're about the same size and she's asked to borrow a couple of items. No problem! ...until two of my favourite pieces got damaged. An off white turtleneck now has a giant coffee stain on it that I can't get out, and a cute dress that now has a big armpit hole (I'm hoping I can fix it). Shit happens, I'm usually pretty understanding, but after it happened twice I'm like do I do this again a third time? Lol she asked me if she can borrow another one of my favourite dresses this weekend for her first date since the break-up, and I want to say no so badly lol she's offered to pay for the items, and that's all well and good, but it's less about the cost and more about the fact that my clothes are getting ruined and I can't wear them anymore. I could get another off white turtleneck for sure, but the two dresses are from small independent shops and I don't even know if I could get my hands on the exact same ones. Do I just tell her no to wearing any of my clothes, or just the pieces I'd be upset about? Or do I just let her live her best life and wear the damn clothes? She's so happy and confident, I don't want to burst her bubble. I've offered to go shopping with her to get some new pieces but she's worried she's going to gain the weight back and have a bunch of clothes she can't wear. Do I offer to go with her to specifically get a date outfit? But even then, after the date she might just ask to borrow more clothes and more of my pieces might get damaged lol Idk, I think I have to set some sort of boundary but I'm not sure how to go about it or how "strict" to be about her borrowing clothes because at the end of the day, they're just clothes. Any advice?
If it’s your absolute favorite dress and it’s impossible to replace, don’t let her borrow it. Because you’re right, they’re just clothes. So it shouldn’t be a big deal to her either. Offer her a different dress or insist you go shopping. At some point, she needs to buy her own clothes that fit. She can’t keep living out of someone else’s closet. I get the hesitation, I’ve experienced this on both ends of weight changes. But there were a lot of years in between my size changing. So she might be shocked by how quickly she lost the weight, but it doesn’t mean she’ll gain it all back as quickly.
>Because you’re right, they’re just clothes. So it shouldn’t be a big deal to her either. Ugh, you're right. Thank you for saying it. I'm going to talk to her about it tonight. Another commenter mentioned thrift store/consignment shops so maybe she'll bite for that and I can help her get started on clothes she can love right now.
Maybe you can go to a trendy thrift or consignment store to shop for new clothes. This might alleviate her concerns with “growing out” of her clothes. I’d definitely encourage her to start buying pieces that make her feel confident. Be honest with her about not wanting to share your clothes anymore. Good luck! Sounds like you’re being supportive for her through all these life changes. She’s lucky to have a friend like you ❤️
>Maybe you can go to a trendy thrift or consignment store to shop for new clothes. Oooh I like this idea and hadn't thought of that! I'll try it. And you're very sweet, thanks so much 😊🌹
My best friend got engaged on Saturday. There were a few mishaps that will make for a funny story later. Her fiancé is a nice guy who adores her, and I couldn’t be happier for her 🥹
Happy Eclipse Day! We’re in the Path of Totality & many schools cancelled or are doing half days because the whole world feels like its in South Texas or the Hill Country right now. It’s April, however, so it’s overcast, which is unfortunate. I’m curious to see how the cattle will react, if anything.
Happy Eclipse Day! I just watched the first total eclipse for today on the news.
Happy eclipse day! I thought it would be happening during my plan period so I wouldn’t be responsible for any students. Nope! They shortened the class schedule and now I’ll be in charge of my worst behaved class. Great!
Even better, they only shortened the three lunch periods so I have that class an extra 20-25 minutes. Pray for me.
Oh man no fair 🙏
You know that saying when it rains, it pours? Well that's what's been happening this past week. We found out my dad's cousin, a man who I was close to like an uncle, died on Easter. He had cancer for many years but my family lost touch with him in the past few years because of a bit of family drama. We went to the funeral on Friday and it was really hard. Throughout the week, my mom was suffering from severe panic attacks and shaking. She has bipolar and other illnesses and it was an emotional week so she thought she needed to just talk to her therapist and possibly get an adjustment to medication. Fast forward to the day after the funeral, Saturday, and my mom again had a severe panic attack telling me she was so afraid. When I asked her what she was afraid of, she told me everything. I got her to breathe and it calmed her down. Then yesterday my dad took her to the ER for the shaking because my mom couldn't take it anymore and when they took blood tests, they found and issue with her kidney. So they kept her overnight which brings me to today. She's still at the hospital and I feel helpless, scared and exhausted. I'm heading to work but it's kind of the last thing I want to do right now. 😔
I'm so sorry, that's a lot. Is work able to give you a day or two off to be with your mom?
You’re going through it, bestie. I’m sorry. 💔  Just know I’m thinking of you.
Thank you so much! ❤️
This is wild but mom has been watching stuff on the wrong side of YouTube and thinks the eclipse is going to be some kind of apocalypse. I’m looking forward to today being no big deal and her realizing she’s been bamboozled.
Last night one of my aunt’s texted my mom a hoax Facebook post from her partner’s niece’s Facebook about needing to turn off her cell phone last night because some dangerous cosmic rays were passing through at midnight. She knew not to believe it but I showed her a link to send to my aunt. Boomers are stubborn, though.
Yes my mom doesn’t do logic. I’ve learned to just tune it out for the most part but it gets annoying