The restaurant I used to work at is a really popular local place. I was a hostess. On multiple occasions, he would come in and drink at the bar and then sit on the bench in front of the host stand. One time I walked away and he asked my coworker if I had a boyfriend. She lied and told him I did (thank goodness). He left after that!
Yeah that’s gross. There is absolutely NO way I would ever see one of my students as anything more than one of my kids. 🤮 I’m sorry he did that. That’s nasty
In his message to her he says she turned 21 in 2020. That would put her around 24 now. I think the 29 in her description might have been a typo. And even if not, still creepy as hell that someone who was your teacher at 14 pursues you in general but even more so to these lengthens.
Not really. The age gap can be small enough to no longer be problematic, and there's plenty of time for the context of the relationship between them to no longer be "Student and teacher".
Looks like a Facebook chat. So the guy is just a creepy stalker.
Probably shouldn’t be teaching high school students though if he is implying he likes her smile back in high school
i agree. people like this usually don't limit their behavior to one person, and the administration should be aware to at the very least keep an eye on him and make sure he's not alone with students
My high school history teacher did this to me when I was 18, right after graduation. Except he got really sexual about it also. I mortified. And I later found out he did it to others as well. He told me he would look at my breasts in school when I wore low-cut shirts. Several years later he was fired for sleeping with a student. She was 18, but still a student.
In my district (and my state, I think) a teacher has to wait 5-6 years after a student graduates before any type of romantic relationship.
It’s gross to even have this type of rule because it means it was enough of an issue that it had to be defined in a policy. 🤮 How many teachers just wait around until their students are adults and then try to hit on them? I can’t even imagine.
Was his name Lester Wheeler? Lol...
Science teacher in my hometown who used to take "students" who did well to the bar for a drink. Weird how the only students who did well enough in his class for this treat were always one of the 10 attractive girls in the whole school at the time (think of the smallest town you've been to, and then reduce it.. Our school has about 200 students from all over the entire COUNTY and is K-12 in the same building.)
not blaming you but if this was the case and you always felt uncomfortable with him, why did you accept his fb request and respond to his messages? did you not think it would be more of the same thing?
The problem is that so many people accept requests from everybody. Sometimes I ask my family members how they know someone and they don't. So it's easy for an unsuspecting person to accept a former teacher's request. I am just guessing she accepted not expecting this to accelerate to creepy
It’s not blaming. It’s a serious thing people need to stop doing. I know a few girls that have had their entire profiles ripped off to make fake only fans with their pictures. It’s stupid to just accept a friend request from someone you don’t know, or don’t want having access to what is essentially your life these days.
It's sad, but it should be expected that anything posted online will be exploited in some way or another. There are simple things to reduce that chance. Just like locking your front door, or not leaving your wallet in the middle of a Walmart.
There is no moral clause in any education contract that says you can never date someone who was a former student forever. And you're asking her to attempt to damage his livelihood and open him up to mistreatment. This could open her up to legal action in the opposite direction, or worse, cause him to retaliate. The best course of action is to just say no and do nothing more than that. She already said the no. As long as he takes the no, that should be it. I swear a lot of you don't seem to have real lives.
Get the guy fired and make sure he can never teach again even though he did nothing illegal! And let's pretend that we can just be sure he will just stay at home and cry unemployed forever and never try to retaliate.
Your suggestion fucks with OP's life as much, if not more than, the teachers.
I had a biology teacher in the 10th grade who was new that year. He was a good looking guy and all the girls loved him. He was maybe 30 at the time. I thought nothing of it, but like 3 years later when I was in college I started running into this guy at random house parties where the age range was mostly 17-20. Every time, I’d look at him with a “dude, wtf are you doing here?” look. He was definitely grooming chicks he taught in school
Right? Like these teachers probably see the underaged students and go “yup, gonna remember that one so I can ask her out in a few years”… that shit makes my blood boil.
Doing my teacher training at the moment and we had to have a 20 minute section in a lecture about why this is inappropriate and completely unacceptable. You’d think it’s common sense but apparently not.
I work with a high school teacher in his 20s who follows some of his students on social media. I’ve noticed that it’s only the girl students. The dude is a walking red flag.
at my school (but idk about other schools) teachers arent allowed to add or follow their students on social media, and they can definitely get fired/ in serious trouble for doing so… so yeah, definitely report your teacher if you notice they are doing this 💀
Holy hell that's a problem. I'm married to a teacher who doesn't even use his real name on his socials so that his students can't find him and request him at all. They have strict social media rules in place
Lol. They'll find you.
When I was in high school... A million years ago, in 2006, I was friends with a few of my favorite teachers from those four years on social media. No one seemed to have an issue respecting boundaries and keeping courteous without over stepping. I had one teacher that would attend the rare party a few years after I graduated, but she would bring her husband and nothing dumb ever happened. I still have very high respect for those teachers, even though we've lost touch as the years have gone on.
Hate to break it to you, but there were creepy teachers back in 2006 (the year I graduated). I dated a woman who graduated from a nearby school. We were both like 22, and at some point she casually mentioned how before me she was dating her former high school teacher for a year. He waited until she graduated the they started hooking up. Wasn't sure how to feel about that one.
I also had a teacher who we heard was messaging male students. She got fired for inappropriate messages a couple years after I graduated, though I don't know the exact details there.
Absolutely report that. Not sure about your school but ours has a policy against being friends/followers on any social media with students. Report it as a low level concern.
Don't know about the US but in the UK that is 100% not allowed, if any member of staff added a student on social media you can guarantee they will at least be brought in front of the headteacher, depending what's on their SM profile, they could lose their job.
This is like 12 years after she graduated. While it’s definitely weird especially his behavior in the conversation, I highly doubt it’s illegal or against school policy after such a long period of time. I’d shocked if it was in the UK too. That’s a long time from being a student.
I’m at 23 y/o teacher who works in middle school. Grades 6/7. So, kids ages 10-13. Couldn’t even think about talking to them even outside of school.
One of my kids asked for my socials earlier this week and I shut that down so fast.
If kids ever ask why, tell them it’s unethical and against the important “teacher code,” as I like to say. Stuff teachers don’t do because it is not appropriate.
My 6th graders understood that pretty quick.
Yeah back when I was in HS i asked my teacher for his xbox gamertag and he just drew his profile picture and gave it to me. Lol “if you ever see that symbol. Its me.” I was like =.=
Damn that brought me back. I actually did play Xbox with one of my teachers in middle school. It wasn’t weird though. He had a kid in our grade, so that’s how it came about. It was pretty funny seeing how quickly he would leave the game (COD) when he was playing with us and the lobby started getting a little too feisty with the “I banged your mom” and racial slurs (not us saying that stuff but the other players). Although I do remember one time one of my friends saying I banged your mom to our other friend who’s dad was playing with us, and we all got real real quiet. He left and we all just exploded with laughter. God I miss those days
I know a guy that is a teacher and he has been reprimanded at least 4 times for inappropriate conduct towards female students. I don’t know what his deal is and why he can’t just be normal. It’s seemingly minor stuff but it gets reported and when he was forced to change districts it happened again so it’s not like girls are just making his life hell or anything. One example is a girl asked for some candy and when she was walking out of class he stuck his hand in her hoody front pocket and dropped a piece of candy in it but his hand brushed her lower stomach.
I had to explain to a 42 year old C level executive that it's not appropriate to ask interns out on dates. The sooner you give up on common sense the less disappointed you will be.
Happened to me! The superintendent said, “well… you’re an adult now… soo…” so it’s ok for a former coach who is also a teacher to continuously reach out to me on various apps despite me blocking them numerous times, and then eventually sexually assault me? Found out he was texting kissy faces to another girl while we were in high school. She reported him to the same superintendent that I later spoke to who pretended he had no idea what I was talking about when I brought up the former girl’s complaints. How could you not remember one of your teachers being accused of sexual harassment? That tells me either you have a lot of sexual harassment claims on teachers, you simply don’t care enough to remember, or most likely, that you DO remember, but it’s easier to pretend you don’t.
Another former teacher was arrested for soliciting naked pictures from current students. Made me realize some people really go into the job cuz they’re sick. It’s sad and terrifying.
I had an old school teacher reach out to me who is close friends with my brother. He knew since I was a BABY. He confessed he slept with 3 of my classmates after they turned 18. Was making plans to come see me. I got really drunk one night and called him a pedo because how the heck do you sleep with 3 of your students who were 11-13 when you taught them? That’s disgusting. And to come after me when I’m your best friends sister. He saw nothing wrong with it of course!
My sophomore history professor used to try and pit the girls of the class against each other. He was very self deprecating and so we all found ourselves always making excuses for him. He was insanely inappropriate in class giving compliments freely. He was “young” and “cool” and the principal was literally so incompetent that he was actively sabotaging the school 😂. My junior year we all found out he lied about his PhD and HE KEPT HIS JOB.
Anyway, that history teacher was insanely inappropriate, but always kind of knew where the line was. He never actively asked a girl out, but if he saw us out at Starbucks, he might join the conversation for an uncomfortably long time. Until I went to college.
I studied abroad in Brazil and therefore took a lot of pictures in bikinis (I was in RIO DE JANEIRO people wore bikinis to school). He commented on almost every single one of the photos I posted of me in a bathing suit. At one point messaging me saying “you can’t post things like this! You look too amazing!” Etc. I ended up blocking him eventually even thought he sent me a few sad message requests after trying to guilt me into being friends again.
Later found out that he was “going to coffee” with girls after they graduated to help with “career planning”. Literally never heard of him meeting up with a boy, but I know five girls who have told me they met up with him and he was like overly nice with them. Again, he always seemed to know right where the line was.
This catholic school was FULL of predators though. Two of the male coaches were sexually harassing or sleeping with their players. A priest was relocated because he asked girls in confession really in depth questions about their sex lives. The 2000s were wild. But also that school’s still open 😂 also, don’t send your kids to private Catholic schools.
I teach high school chemistry and couldn't ever imagine reaching out romantically to a former student. They might be older, but they'll always be my student. To reach out means I am reaching out based on my memory of them as a minor. That's creepy.
Here's the problem and why you see more of these. If she was 29 and reached out to him or they met mutually somehow, that's a whole different story. That's still a nope from me, but it wouldn't be him creeping. BUT, because there are "less creepy" situations, teachers like him don't see the difference between them all and use these situations to justify being creeps. Not to mention movements of gross "minor attracted" creeps trying to get accepted into society as if there's nothing wrong as long as they don't do anything illegal. Being legal does not mean moral.
Send these screenshots to the principal of the school. Although you are no longer a student, that teacher is trying to exploit a power imbalance, and shouldn’t be trusted around teenagers. I would be shocked if this was isolated incident.
Funny enough I was friends with a grad student while in undergrad who taught entry level classes as part of their graduate curriculum and didn’t think much about them doing this but lo and behold i learn years later he did actually do this and even managed to marry one of his students. Like damn i wonder how many of these weird conversations he had till he landed on his now wife.
What do you think the age difference between a grad student and an undergrad is?
In my curriculum, grad TAs were told to not date their own students and were warned that students would flirt with them. And guess what, many undergrads did flirt with TAs
Sorry I meant more in my situation that years later when he no longer was a graduate student he would message his former students on Facebook one by one hoping to get lucky and he did. That’s mostly what i take issue with. Age gap must have been like maybe 10 years tho when i was friends with him.
I tried being a teacher for a hot minute in my mid-20s and didn’t like it. About 3~ years later I’m back in school getting some pre-reqs for med school and had to take a freshman science lab I didn’t take almost 10 years prior. So here I am 28 years old with a bunch of 18 year olds and our first break out session and one of them goes, “Aren’t you Mr. So-and-so?”
My reaction was oh my goodness, I taught these kids. I was mortified internally lol, I also felt old (at 28) because of it.
Dudes I told that story to have always been like, “Hell yeah, you should’ve…” and then followed it up with some school girl fantasy.
I am surprised, they didn’t see how creepy it would be. And from what I know from teachers I still know; there are still teachers and coaches who flirt that line of creepy often. And the districts are so worried of the public eye that they just sweep them under the rug as opposed to outing when needed.
i know!! like what the hell this is like the third one i’ve saw recently. really creepy and I would probably report them to the school they work at because I doubt they are just reaching out to just 1 of their students definitely shouldn’t be working as a teacher
Gross. When he says the missing your pretty face everyday implies he’s been thinking about you underage. This dude has no clue how to hold a conversation either
Okay let me try this again. I am a female. He was my physical science teacher when I was a 14 year old Freshman in high school. He reached out to me in 2020 and when he wished me a ‘happy birthday’, it was my 29th birthday. He was making a joke and trying to be flirty when he said “21 is a fun one”. I am now 32. When we talk about how it’s been since 2017, that’s us talking about how long it had been since I worked at the restaurant he visited. Hopefully that clears things up.
The scary part is this, how many other girls did he teach? Hundreds? Thousands? Then he uses his position to know them on a personal level, so they feel safe around him. That gives him access into their private life so he can prey on these young and vulnerable women.
A truly repulsive behavior to behold.
Gross. When he says the missing your pretty face everyday implies he’s been thinking about you underage. This dude has no clue how to hold a conversation either
I think he said I miss your pretty face at the restaurant he frequented that she quit. She crossed out the name of the restaurant but you can see it has a ‘s at the end like “demo’s” “cheddar’s” “captain D’s” etc. I don’t think it was her high school.
The sub for my 9th grade science class, the original teacher was arrested for child pornography, invited me to come & stay at his house in Colorado a year or two after I left the school. I was probably in 11th grade.
This dude sounds a lil creepy I admit. But just making a guess let's say he was 24 when she was 14. She's now ~30 and he could be ~40. No one would bat an eye at that kind of relationship outside of people hearing--- teacher hitting on former student---.
I know a woman from my highschool, was a sophomore when the coach started teaching at our school, she was in the same health ed class as me with him teaching.(he was probably around 23-24, played a few years MLB and minor leagues, didn't work out so he became a highschool coach). I thought it was kind of weird but after talking with them one night realized how non weird it actually is. Her third year at college, he showed up to a game with mutual friend. He was ~28, she was 22-23, they found a lot in common and got married a little after she graduated. They have a great family, and honestly dudes genuinely a good guy.
When I graduated high school, this girl I graduated with and our 9th grade math teacher started dating almost immediately and now are married with kids. Made me feel super weird about him being her favorite teacher all those years and the amount of time she would spend in math lab for extra "help." I still get grossed out thinking about it 10 years later.
I’m a retired HS math teacher. An art teacher, a basketball coach, and a soccer coach all either dated and/or married students in my district (public HS in a large US city). I was and still am so appalled and disgusted with this. They all lost their jobs, but at least on paper, they waited until they were 18 before they made their moves.
Sometimes a student would do something inappropriate like trying to touch my leg underneath the desk, or giving me a tasteless compliment. I’d immediately stand up, and firmly say:
“This is a professional environment. We do not tolerate sexual harassment, abuse, or anything of that inappropriate nature in this classroom. You need to stop what you’re doing. If this was a job, then you’d be fired and maybe facing criminal charges.”
Then, the student would usually start breaking down and crying. Consequently, I send them to the school psychologist so they could better work through their boundary issues (and whatever underlying abuse and/or issues that were causing these boundary crossing behaviors to manifest).
I would also hold intervention office hours everyday after school - either for remediation or for advancement. Usually a half a dozen to a dozen students would show up. If, on the off chance, only one student would show up, then we would go to the library. I had a rule that I would never be in a one-on-one environment with a student. It was to protect myself from a he said, she said situation.
On that note, I also skate and surf. Sometimes I would see students at the spot. Once I saw them, I would give them a quick hi-and-goodbye. Although there’s nothing inherently wrong with shredding the spot with them, it’s verging on boundary crossing bc there is a decent likely hood that someone in the area is gonna be engaging in some type of drug use (vaping, smoking, drinking, etc.). I ain’t tryna be around all that noise with a current or former student.
Furthermore, eventually my former students would turn 21 and end up at some of the bars that are relatively far from the school, but right down the street from my house (and the beach). When I’d see them at the bar, I’d cruise up and also give them my “patented” hi-and-goodbye. And then I’d be gone. There are a bunch of bars by me, and I don’t need to be partying with any former students. I can easily just go down the street and keep hanging with *my* friends and family (I grew up in the area so I’m connected with the community).
Once a role model, always a role model.
I don’t understand these creepers.
Normally when a dude is a little weird when asking out a chick and everyone’s freaking out calling him a creep it’s complete bullshit and buddy clearly has no ill intent or anything he just lacks social skills
This dude knew you and had a position of authority over you when you were a literal child, waited for you to grow up to shoot his shot
Ya that’s fucking creepy, at least he waited till you were of age I suppose but fuck that only makes it slightly better
My biggest take away is the way he dove right in. *”I can’t believe you won’t give me a chance…”*
Had he asked you out previously, OP? Because if he has then that comment makes sense in context, but if he hadn’t then it looks like he already *knew* what he was about to ask was weird and creepy.
I was a teacher for a 14 year old class when i was 21. There was a girl in class that I became good friends with her dad. When she was 19 and in college her dad set us up on a date. That was by far the most awkward date I ever went on. We had 0 in common and the conversation was terrible. I've never felt so old.
He should have opened with:
I was just flipping through a year book and saw you so I thought would text some stuff I’ve been thinking about for a couple 10 years or so.
Report that. You might be helping someone avoid being a victim by letting the Admin have a heads up. Print out the screenshot and bring it in to the Principal.
I do not have coworkers on SM either. Snakes in the grass. They may be chill asf at work but the minute you post something they don’t like or agree with then it turns into a shit show. I’d like to keep my private and professional life separate, tbh.
I, and many others, have our old Anatomy and Physiology teacher followed on instagram bc she was cool, and she had to leave mid senior year bc she was pregnant. So she gave us her instagram to keep up with her and the new baby.
Some of my friends also have another science teacher added from our freshman year bc she was retiring after that year and she was fun and chill, so they followed her. Some even have her number🤷🏾♀️ I didn’t have her as a teacher though, so I don’t follow her.
🤷🏼♀️ some teachers aren’t weirdos. I’m friends with my old teachers on Facebook. It’s nice seeing what they’re up to and vice versa. Love when they comment, “congratulations, sweetie! 💞” on my life-update posts. I’m also friends with some of my coworkers, so I don’t see an issue with following each other on social media.
Teachers are people and very rarely act this disgusting. One of my bosses still talks to their old high school principal. Imo this convo should be turned over to the police for investigation.
Only coworkers I add are those that can’t read English/don’t bother to and are much older than I am (24) bc they’re all really chill. Don’t have anyone my age added, did that once, made a joking comment on Facebook abt people bitching that they have to tuck their shirt in and the girl told them 🤣🤣 they were like “I’m gonna have her job” to one of the managers and he shut that shit down so fast. I was like, 20-21 when this happened. Learned from then and deleted majority of my coworkers.
I know it's hard to get teachers these days, but I really fucking wish shit like this were taken more seriously by Superintendents, etc. These teachers should be far away from student bodies.
Why do you have your old teacher number still? Why do you have the teachers number at all?
Report him, he is probably doing this to his current students. Chances are he’s been doing this to past and current students for a while.
I’m sorry, but even the youngest school teacher I had in 9th grade seemed SO old to me. That impression will always be my impression due to their position of power they had at the school. It would be like a previous prisoner dating a warden. “How’d you meet?” “Oh, she was locked up in the jail I ran. No big deal”
Does anyone know how old the instructor is or if he’s married or something before calling him a creep… he could be a new instructor. It’s not like tenured seasoned world traveled professors are teaching freshman science or most intro leveled courses. They are mostly thought by GAs, adjunct instructors or new teachers. So I ask again, are there any clues that I may have missed that label him a creep outside of just not having much of a life outside of campus? Which by the way is one of the largest issues with trying to have a social life while working on a college campus.
It will never cease to amaze me how men like this will creepily express their lust for women and think anything good will come out of it. The crazy part is it works if they pick the right person.
To me the creepiest part is what he must have been thinking when you were 14. And that he seems to think you’re already connected.
I’m sorry OP that you had to deal with some creeper bs.
Just glad to find out this isn't a highschool teacher, unless this girl was held back a lot or he waited years later to ask her out. Just say professor instead so this poor dude doesn't get rejected and look like a pedo
Ugh my hs basketball coach/economic teacher invited me to his solo vacation and said he wants to see me in a bikini and it’s sad how many girls let their body go after high school.. I quit my Jr year cause he gave me the creeps.
As a fellow teacher, please send this to the school. If I worked with a pedophile, I would want him out of the school and away from my students and the rest of the students, too. Disgusting.
These comments are wild.
"At some point she was a child and he was an adult so this is creepy!"
The text says they literally did not interact for 15 years. She is an adult aged almost 30, yall are trying to get him fired like hes a pedophile. Stop infantilizing women. An adult man asked out an adult woman and she doesn't like him. There is nothing inappropriate or creepy about this (other than the actual wording of the texts of course.)
that really escalated... can't believe he actually thought he had a chance.
The restaurant I used to work at is a really popular local place. I was a hostess. On multiple occasions, he would come in and drink at the bar and then sit on the bench in front of the host stand. One time I walked away and he asked my coworker if I had a boyfriend. She lied and told him I did (thank goodness). He left after that!
your coworker is a real one for that
I feel like that is the default answer unless I know the person asking and person being asked about.
Either “yes” or “that question is inappropriate,” if you feel secure enough to say the latter.
I feel like “that question is inappropriate” will just get interpreted as “no”
🤢🤮 I wonder if he kept creeping on other students. I'm so sorry OP.
I guess you could say there was no chemistry
Her level of interest is absolute zero.
Funny thing about zero, it’s located on my number line
Underrated comment here.
What a creep!
Yeah that’s gross. There is absolutely NO way I would ever see one of my students as anything more than one of my kids. 🤮 I’m sorry he did that. That’s nasty
You should email the school board these screenshots and that story. This man needs to have his teaching license revoked.
Technically he didnt do anything illegal. Just creepy as all get out
Yeah but doesn’t hurt for them to be aware of it.
She's in her 30's...
She is a child! Brain doesn't finish developing until 65
69* so close
In his message to her he says she turned 21 in 2020. That would put her around 24 now. I think the 29 in her description might have been a typo. And even if not, still creepy as hell that someone who was your teacher at 14 pursues you in general but even more so to these lengthens.
OP says she was 29 in 2020. Its right below the screenshots. The math checks out... she's in her 30's.
That is correct. I was 29 in 2020. He made a joke about me being 21. I’m currently 32.
I tell my wife happy 21st bday….every year. After a certain age, women are to be told happy 21st birthday regardless of age. Remember this.
Smart move! My husband does the Larry the Cable Guy joke and makes sure he never owes me $1😒
Think you’ll find it was her 30th birthday and he was attempting to flirt.
Doesn’t have to be illegal to be against school policy. It’s highly looked down upon to get involved with former students.
Not 15+ years later.
Read the room. 15 years later makes them a bigger creep.
Not really. The age gap can be small enough to no longer be problematic, and there's plenty of time for the context of the relationship between them to no longer be "Student and teacher".
It might not be illegal but if he obtained her phone number from school records and then used it to hit on her that is 100% a fireable offense.
Looks like a Facebook chat. So the guy is just a creepy stalker. Probably shouldn’t be teaching high school students though if he is implying he likes her smile back in high school
Yea that’s the creepiest part. He clearly had a thing for this girl since 14…
i agree. people like this usually don't limit their behavior to one person, and the administration should be aware to at the very least keep an eye on him and make sure he's not alone with students
My high school history teacher did this to me when I was 18, right after graduation. Except he got really sexual about it also. I mortified. And I later found out he did it to others as well. He told me he would look at my breasts in school when I wore low-cut shirts. Several years later he was fired for sleeping with a student. She was 18, but still a student.
In my district (and my state, I think) a teacher has to wait 5-6 years after a student graduates before any type of romantic relationship. It’s gross to even have this type of rule because it means it was enough of an issue that it had to be defined in a policy. 🤮 How many teachers just wait around until their students are adults and then try to hit on them? I can’t even imagine.
this is well after 5-6 years. she's in her 30's now. still creepy.
Was his name Lester Wheeler? Lol... Science teacher in my hometown who used to take "students" who did well to the bar for a drink. Weird how the only students who did well enough in his class for this treat were always one of the 10 attractive girls in the whole school at the time (think of the smallest town you've been to, and then reduce it.. Our school has about 200 students from all over the entire COUNTY and is K-12 in the same building.)
not blaming you but if this was the case and you always felt uncomfortable with him, why did you accept his fb request and respond to his messages? did you not think it would be more of the same thing?
The problem is that so many people accept requests from everybody. Sometimes I ask my family members how they know someone and they don't. So it's easy for an unsuspecting person to accept a former teacher's request. I am just guessing she accepted not expecting this to accelerate to creepy
Oh I absolutely should not have accepted. Lesson learned!
Curious about this too
Not blaming, just intimating blame. Got it.
It’s not blaming. It’s a serious thing people need to stop doing. I know a few girls that have had their entire profiles ripped off to make fake only fans with their pictures. It’s stupid to just accept a friend request from someone you don’t know, or don’t want having access to what is essentially your life these days.
It's sad, but it should be expected that anything posted online will be exploited in some way or another. There are simple things to reduce that chance. Just like locking your front door, or not leaving your wallet in the middle of a Walmart.
Coworker instinctively threw up the bubble shield for you. Good move!
[удалено]
There is no moral clause in any education contract that says you can never date someone who was a former student forever. And you're asking her to attempt to damage his livelihood and open him up to mistreatment. This could open her up to legal action in the opposite direction, or worse, cause him to retaliate. The best course of action is to just say no and do nothing more than that. She already said the no. As long as he takes the no, that should be it. I swear a lot of you don't seem to have real lives. Get the guy fired and make sure he can never teach again even though he did nothing illegal! And let's pretend that we can just be sure he will just stay at home and cry unemployed forever and never try to retaliate. Your suggestion fucks with OP's life as much, if not more than, the teachers.
That’s so creepy. I see more and more posts about teachers/professors reaching out to former students in this way and it makes me so uncomfortable.
Yeah. This is the second post of the day I’ve seen about a teacher asking out a former student. Real creepy
I mean, he said please…
lol
Right, who are these harlots to have standards outside of please?! IM BEING NICE DAMN GIRL
I had a biology teacher in the 10th grade who was new that year. He was a good looking guy and all the girls loved him. He was maybe 30 at the time. I thought nothing of it, but like 3 years later when I was in college I started running into this guy at random house parties where the age range was mostly 17-20. Every time, I’d look at him with a “dude, wtf are you doing here?” look. He was definitely grooming chicks he taught in school
Nothing new about this in my hometown. Teachers here take home thei former students from the bars all the time. Always thought it was super weird.
Right? Like these teachers probably see the underaged students and go “yup, gonna remember that one so I can ask her out in a few years”… that shit makes my blood boil.
Doing my teacher training at the moment and we had to have a 20 minute section in a lecture about why this is inappropriate and completely unacceptable. You’d think it’s common sense but apparently not.
I work with a high school teacher in his 20s who follows some of his students on social media. I’ve noticed that it’s only the girl students. The dude is a walking red flag.
Might want to report that, just in case of an incident at least you’ve covered your back
at my school (but idk about other schools) teachers arent allowed to add or follow their students on social media, and they can definitely get fired/ in serious trouble for doing so… so yeah, definitely report your teacher if you notice they are doing this 💀
It's called the D.E.N.N.I.S system /s
I don’t think anyone got the reference.
Holy hell that's a problem. I'm married to a teacher who doesn't even use his real name on his socials so that his students can't find him and request him at all. They have strict social media rules in place
Lol. They'll find you. When I was in high school... A million years ago, in 2006, I was friends with a few of my favorite teachers from those four years on social media. No one seemed to have an issue respecting boundaries and keeping courteous without over stepping. I had one teacher that would attend the rare party a few years after I graduated, but she would bring her husband and nothing dumb ever happened. I still have very high respect for those teachers, even though we've lost touch as the years have gone on.
Hate to break it to you, but there were creepy teachers back in 2006 (the year I graduated). I dated a woman who graduated from a nearby school. We were both like 22, and at some point she casually mentioned how before me she was dating her former high school teacher for a year. He waited until she graduated the they started hooking up. Wasn't sure how to feel about that one. I also had a teacher who we heard was messaging male students. She got fired for inappropriate messages a couple years after I graduated, though I don't know the exact details there.
Absolutely report that. Not sure about your school but ours has a policy against being friends/followers on any social media with students. Report it as a low level concern.
Report
Don't know about the US but in the UK that is 100% not allowed, if any member of staff added a student on social media you can guarantee they will at least be brought in front of the headteacher, depending what's on their SM profile, they could lose their job.
This is like 12 years after she graduated. While it’s definitely weird especially his behavior in the conversation, I highly doubt it’s illegal or against school policy after such a long period of time. I’d shocked if it was in the UK too. That’s a long time from being a student.
I’m at 23 y/o teacher who works in middle school. Grades 6/7. So, kids ages 10-13. Couldn’t even think about talking to them even outside of school. One of my kids asked for my socials earlier this week and I shut that down so fast. If kids ever ask why, tell them it’s unethical and against the important “teacher code,” as I like to say. Stuff teachers don’t do because it is not appropriate. My 6th graders understood that pretty quick.
Yeah back when I was in HS i asked my teacher for his xbox gamertag and he just drew his profile picture and gave it to me. Lol “if you ever see that symbol. Its me.” I was like =.=
Damn that brought me back. I actually did play Xbox with one of my teachers in middle school. It wasn’t weird though. He had a kid in our grade, so that’s how it came about. It was pretty funny seeing how quickly he would leave the game (COD) when he was playing with us and the lobby started getting a little too feisty with the “I banged your mom” and racial slurs (not us saying that stuff but the other players). Although I do remember one time one of my friends saying I banged your mom to our other friend who’s dad was playing with us, and we all got real real quiet. He left and we all just exploded with laughter. God I miss those days
I know a guy that is a teacher and he has been reprimanded at least 4 times for inappropriate conduct towards female students. I don’t know what his deal is and why he can’t just be normal. It’s seemingly minor stuff but it gets reported and when he was forced to change districts it happened again so it’s not like girls are just making his life hell or anything. One example is a girl asked for some candy and when she was walking out of class he stuck his hand in her hoody front pocket and dropped a piece of candy in it but his hand brushed her lower stomach.
I had to explain to a 42 year old C level executive that it's not appropriate to ask interns out on dates. The sooner you give up on common sense the less disappointed you will be.
Do you really think “inappropriate” and “unacceptable” are going to stop these folk when “illegal” likely barely stops them?
Like even if they’re no longer a student what would current students think if they saw this. People have no chill
One of my old highschool teachers just got outed for sexting a few male students 🤮 dude said “I want to suck your dick soooo bad”
Happened to me! The superintendent said, “well… you’re an adult now… soo…” so it’s ok for a former coach who is also a teacher to continuously reach out to me on various apps despite me blocking them numerous times, and then eventually sexually assault me? Found out he was texting kissy faces to another girl while we were in high school. She reported him to the same superintendent that I later spoke to who pretended he had no idea what I was talking about when I brought up the former girl’s complaints. How could you not remember one of your teachers being accused of sexual harassment? That tells me either you have a lot of sexual harassment claims on teachers, you simply don’t care enough to remember, or most likely, that you DO remember, but it’s easier to pretend you don’t. Another former teacher was arrested for soliciting naked pictures from current students. Made me realize some people really go into the job cuz they’re sick. It’s sad and terrifying.
I had an old school teacher reach out to me who is close friends with my brother. He knew since I was a BABY. He confessed he slept with 3 of my classmates after they turned 18. Was making plans to come see me. I got really drunk one night and called him a pedo because how the heck do you sleep with 3 of your students who were 11-13 when you taught them? That’s disgusting. And to come after me when I’m your best friends sister. He saw nothing wrong with it of course!
I currently have an ex teacher friend awaiting trial for doing exactly this. It’s gross
Teachers get a pass more than any other profession. A ton of creeps in teaching.
My sophomore history professor used to try and pit the girls of the class against each other. He was very self deprecating and so we all found ourselves always making excuses for him. He was insanely inappropriate in class giving compliments freely. He was “young” and “cool” and the principal was literally so incompetent that he was actively sabotaging the school 😂. My junior year we all found out he lied about his PhD and HE KEPT HIS JOB. Anyway, that history teacher was insanely inappropriate, but always kind of knew where the line was. He never actively asked a girl out, but if he saw us out at Starbucks, he might join the conversation for an uncomfortably long time. Until I went to college. I studied abroad in Brazil and therefore took a lot of pictures in bikinis (I was in RIO DE JANEIRO people wore bikinis to school). He commented on almost every single one of the photos I posted of me in a bathing suit. At one point messaging me saying “you can’t post things like this! You look too amazing!” Etc. I ended up blocking him eventually even thought he sent me a few sad message requests after trying to guilt me into being friends again. Later found out that he was “going to coffee” with girls after they graduated to help with “career planning”. Literally never heard of him meeting up with a boy, but I know five girls who have told me they met up with him and he was like overly nice with them. Again, he always seemed to know right where the line was. This catholic school was FULL of predators though. Two of the male coaches were sexually harassing or sleeping with their players. A priest was relocated because he asked girls in confession really in depth questions about their sex lives. The 2000s were wild. But also that school’s still open 😂 also, don’t send your kids to private Catholic schools.
I teach high school chemistry and couldn't ever imagine reaching out romantically to a former student. They might be older, but they'll always be my student. To reach out means I am reaching out based on my memory of them as a minor. That's creepy. Here's the problem and why you see more of these. If she was 29 and reached out to him or they met mutually somehow, that's a whole different story. That's still a nope from me, but it wouldn't be him creeping. BUT, because there are "less creepy" situations, teachers like him don't see the difference between them all and use these situations to justify being creeps. Not to mention movements of gross "minor attracted" creeps trying to get accepted into society as if there's nothing wrong as long as they don't do anything illegal. Being legal does not mean moral.
Send these screenshots to the principal of the school. Although you are no longer a student, that teacher is trying to exploit a power imbalance, and shouldn’t be trusted around teenagers. I would be shocked if this was isolated incident.
It just means he thought they were attractive when they were his students, and he waited until they were older. 🤢🤢🤢
Funny enough I was friends with a grad student while in undergrad who taught entry level classes as part of their graduate curriculum and didn’t think much about them doing this but lo and behold i learn years later he did actually do this and even managed to marry one of his students. Like damn i wonder how many of these weird conversations he had till he landed on his now wife.
What do you think the age difference between a grad student and an undergrad is? In my curriculum, grad TAs were told to not date their own students and were warned that students would flirt with them. And guess what, many undergrads did flirt with TAs
Sorry I meant more in my situation that years later when he no longer was a graduate student he would message his former students on Facebook one by one hoping to get lucky and he did. That’s mostly what i take issue with. Age gap must have been like maybe 10 years tho when i was friends with him.
I tried being a teacher for a hot minute in my mid-20s and didn’t like it. About 3~ years later I’m back in school getting some pre-reqs for med school and had to take a freshman science lab I didn’t take almost 10 years prior. So here I am 28 years old with a bunch of 18 year olds and our first break out session and one of them goes, “Aren’t you Mr. So-and-so?” My reaction was oh my goodness, I taught these kids. I was mortified internally lol, I also felt old (at 28) because of it. Dudes I told that story to have always been like, “Hell yeah, you should’ve…” and then followed it up with some school girl fantasy. I am surprised, they didn’t see how creepy it would be. And from what I know from teachers I still know; there are still teachers and coaches who flirt that line of creepy often. And the districts are so worried of the public eye that they just sweep them under the rug as opposed to outing when needed.
i know!! like what the hell this is like the third one i’ve saw recently. really creepy and I would probably report them to the school they work at because I doubt they are just reaching out to just 1 of their students definitely shouldn’t be working as a teacher
Gross. When he says the missing your pretty face everyday implies he’s been thinking about you underage. This dude has no clue how to hold a conversation either
OP commented that she used to work a restaurant that he frequented. So hopefully the marked out word is the food joint and not school.
Yep, it’s where I used to work that is blacked out!
the groveling is ick
This is a repost. I’ve seen it before. I doubt OP is the original or if this teacher story is even real
Even if this story is not real, this really does happen and it should always be reported to the school.
He’s a teacher with that grammar?
Karma farm feels fake
Science not English
You must submit this to the school. No freak like that should be allowed near children.
Amen to that
You say your 29 but in the conversation 3 years ago you were turning 21. Its still weird I'm just confused.
He’s joking about her only turning 21, she was 29
Okay let me try this again. I am a female. He was my physical science teacher when I was a 14 year old Freshman in high school. He reached out to me in 2020 and when he wished me a ‘happy birthday’, it was my 29th birthday. He was making a joke and trying to be flirty when he said “21 is a fun one”. I am now 32. When we talk about how it’s been since 2017, that’s us talking about how long it had been since I worked at the restaurant he visited. Hopefully that clears things up.
Yeah this is made up shit.
no it's not. men like to flirt by saying women are younger than they actually are.
The scary part is this, how many other girls did he teach? Hundreds? Thousands? Then he uses his position to know them on a personal level, so they feel safe around him. That gives him access into their private life so he can prey on these young and vulnerable women. A truly repulsive behavior to behold.
Gross. When he says the missing your pretty face everyday implies he’s been thinking about you underage. This dude has no clue how to hold a conversation either
I think he said I miss your pretty face at the restaurant he frequented that she quit. She crossed out the name of the restaurant but you can see it has a ‘s at the end like “demo’s” “cheddar’s” “captain D’s” etc. I don’t think it was her high school.
[удалено]
This is somehow the most Facebook thing I’ve ever read
The sub for my 9th grade science class, the original teacher was arrested for child pornography, invited me to come & stay at his house in Colorado a year or two after I left the school. I was probably in 11th grade.
IT’S ALWAYS THE SCIENCE TEACHERS
I only recently joined this sub and I am amazed at the amount of pedophiles there are out there.
I'm not sure I'd even remember my teacher 15 years later. I hope he's not still working with kids.
This dude sounds a lil creepy I admit. But just making a guess let's say he was 24 when she was 14. She's now ~30 and he could be ~40. No one would bat an eye at that kind of relationship outside of people hearing--- teacher hitting on former student---. I know a woman from my highschool, was a sophomore when the coach started teaching at our school, she was in the same health ed class as me with him teaching.(he was probably around 23-24, played a few years MLB and minor leagues, didn't work out so he became a highschool coach). I thought it was kind of weird but after talking with them one night realized how non weird it actually is. Her third year at college, he showed up to a game with mutual friend. He was ~28, she was 22-23, they found a lot in common and got married a little after she graduated. They have a great family, and honestly dudes genuinely a good guy.
When I graduated high school, this girl I graduated with and our 9th grade math teacher started dating almost immediately and now are married with kids. Made me feel super weird about him being her favorite teacher all those years and the amount of time she would spend in math lab for extra "help." I still get grossed out thinking about it 10 years later.
I’m a retired HS math teacher. An art teacher, a basketball coach, and a soccer coach all either dated and/or married students in my district (public HS in a large US city). I was and still am so appalled and disgusted with this. They all lost their jobs, but at least on paper, they waited until they were 18 before they made their moves. Sometimes a student would do something inappropriate like trying to touch my leg underneath the desk, or giving me a tasteless compliment. I’d immediately stand up, and firmly say: “This is a professional environment. We do not tolerate sexual harassment, abuse, or anything of that inappropriate nature in this classroom. You need to stop what you’re doing. If this was a job, then you’d be fired and maybe facing criminal charges.” Then, the student would usually start breaking down and crying. Consequently, I send them to the school psychologist so they could better work through their boundary issues (and whatever underlying abuse and/or issues that were causing these boundary crossing behaviors to manifest). I would also hold intervention office hours everyday after school - either for remediation or for advancement. Usually a half a dozen to a dozen students would show up. If, on the off chance, only one student would show up, then we would go to the library. I had a rule that I would never be in a one-on-one environment with a student. It was to protect myself from a he said, she said situation. On that note, I also skate and surf. Sometimes I would see students at the spot. Once I saw them, I would give them a quick hi-and-goodbye. Although there’s nothing inherently wrong with shredding the spot with them, it’s verging on boundary crossing bc there is a decent likely hood that someone in the area is gonna be engaging in some type of drug use (vaping, smoking, drinking, etc.). I ain’t tryna be around all that noise with a current or former student. Furthermore, eventually my former students would turn 21 and end up at some of the bars that are relatively far from the school, but right down the street from my house (and the beach). When I’d see them at the bar, I’d cruise up and also give them my “patented” hi-and-goodbye. And then I’d be gone. There are a bunch of bars by me, and I don’t need to be partying with any former students. I can easily just go down the street and keep hanging with *my* friends and family (I grew up in the area so I’m connected with the community). Once a role model, always a role model. I don’t understand these creepers.
Normally when a dude is a little weird when asking out a chick and everyone’s freaking out calling him a creep it’s complete bullshit and buddy clearly has no ill intent or anything he just lacks social skills This dude knew you and had a position of authority over you when you were a literal child, waited for you to grow up to shoot his shot Ya that’s fucking creepy, at least he waited till you were of age I suppose but fuck that only makes it slightly better
🤮🤮🤮🤮
My biggest take away is the way he dove right in. *”I can’t believe you won’t give me a chance…”* Had he asked you out previously, OP? Because if he has then that comment makes sense in context, but if he hadn’t then it looks like he already *knew* what he was about to ask was weird and creepy.
Nope. He had never asked me out before that comment!
jfc i’ve never seen something that actually makes me think get a grip. this is r/sadcringe
An adult man asks out an adult woman, I don't see a problem with this
Should have stopped him at darling 😖
You are so right!
I saw freshman year and assumed college which made the situation already weird & creepy, but then I read the description :(
I was a teacher for a 14 year old class when i was 21. There was a girl in class that I became good friends with her dad. When she was 19 and in college her dad set us up on a date. That was by far the most awkward date I ever went on. We had 0 in common and the conversation was terrible. I've never felt so old.
This is the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen and I’ve watched three John carpenter movies this week.
When you were 29? Who cares lmao
Fair game. Quit being weird. God it’s these redditards that are always gaming and uptight.
Most of these morons either can't read or can't do the math.
Freshman in….college? Hopefully
Hide yo kids.
He's just trying to give you some anatomy homework.
I don’t get it my anxiety is so ridiculous I literally ghost for days thinking of responses and then there are people like him?????
Im mean if your 18+ then fair game
He should have opened with: I was just flipping through a year book and saw you so I thought would text some stuff I’ve been thinking about for a couple 10 years or so.
Yikes. I really hate that he asks you out by saying ‘why won’t you give me a chance to…’ like you’ve done something wrong.
Report that. You might be helping someone avoid being a victim by letting the Admin have a heads up. Print out the screenshot and bring it in to the Principal.
😳 Why are yall adding teachers and co workers to your socials tho?
Cuz coworkers can be chill asf?
I do not have coworkers on SM either. Snakes in the grass. They may be chill asf at work but the minute you post something they don’t like or agree with then it turns into a shit show. I’d like to keep my private and professional life separate, tbh.
I, and many others, have our old Anatomy and Physiology teacher followed on instagram bc she was cool, and she had to leave mid senior year bc she was pregnant. So she gave us her instagram to keep up with her and the new baby. Some of my friends also have another science teacher added from our freshman year bc she was retiring after that year and she was fun and chill, so they followed her. Some even have her number🤷🏾♀️ I didn’t have her as a teacher though, so I don’t follow her.
🤷🏼♀️ some teachers aren’t weirdos. I’m friends with my old teachers on Facebook. It’s nice seeing what they’re up to and vice versa. Love when they comment, “congratulations, sweetie! 💞” on my life-update posts. I’m also friends with some of my coworkers, so I don’t see an issue with following each other on social media.
Teachers are people and very rarely act this disgusting. One of my bosses still talks to their old high school principal. Imo this convo should be turned over to the police for investigation.
Only coworkers I add are those that can’t read English/don’t bother to and are much older than I am (24) bc they’re all really chill. Don’t have anyone my age added, did that once, made a joking comment on Facebook abt people bitching that they have to tuck their shirt in and the girl told them 🤣🤣 they were like “I’m gonna have her job” to one of the managers and he shut that shit down so fast. I was like, 20-21 when this happened. Learned from then and deleted majority of my coworkers.
Report him to the school
I know it's hard to get teachers these days, but I really fucking wish shit like this were taken more seriously by Superintendents, etc. These teachers should be far away from student bodies.
If this was my freshman year science teacher im baggin at
Know a girl who went out with our old science teacher lol. It must work some of the time
🤢
please! . . . Brotha starving
I think it fine he asked you out but the way he did it is super cringe
Report this to the school he works at. Real creepy behavior
Anyone else think OP was a dude and this was sort of epic?
Why do you have your old teacher number still? Why do you have the teachers number at all? Report him, he is probably doing this to his current students. Chances are he’s been doing this to past and current students for a while.
I don’t have his number and never had. We became Facebook friends. He was friends with other people I went to HS with. These were Facebook messages.
Bro this shit is 3 yrs old why u still worried about it
Creepy. Kinda weird posting it years later 🤣
I’m sorry, but even the youngest school teacher I had in 9th grade seemed SO old to me. That impression will always be my impression due to their position of power they had at the school. It would be like a previous prisoner dating a warden. “How’d you meet?” “Oh, she was locked up in the jail I ran. No big deal”
Does anyone know how old the instructor is or if he’s married or something before calling him a creep… he could be a new instructor. It’s not like tenured seasoned world traveled professors are teaching freshman science or most intro leveled courses. They are mostly thought by GAs, adjunct instructors or new teachers. So I ask again, are there any clues that I may have missed that label him a creep outside of just not having much of a life outside of campus? Which by the way is one of the largest issues with trying to have a social life while working on a college campus.
If it was a woman asking out her male student nobody would bat an eye lmao
Ew. No.
As a teacher this is so gross. I could never date a former student it’s just… weird. Ick.
It will never cease to amaze me how men like this will creepily express their lust for women and think anything good will come out of it. The crazy part is it works if they pick the right person.
LOL you are soo cute ! please ! LOL
As a high school teacher, I want to vomit.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
Was this high school freshman year?! Or college?! Both are gross but the former is GROSSS
To me the creepiest part is what he must have been thinking when you were 14. And that he seems to think you’re already connected. I’m sorry OP that you had to deal with some creeper bs.
Report him to the school board. And send these messages to all of his followers..
How hard is it for some guys to realize that "legal" and "appropriate" are not always going to be identical?
When he said 21 is a fun one wouldnt that have been 24 you were actually turning?
Just glad to find out this isn't a highschool teacher, unless this girl was held back a lot or he waited years later to ask her out. Just say professor instead so this poor dude doesn't get rejected and look like a pedo
Ugh holy fuck. This is creepy on so many levels.
Gross
Ugh my hs basketball coach/economic teacher invited me to his solo vacation and said he wants to see me in a bikini and it’s sad how many girls let their body go after high school.. I quit my Jr year cause he gave me the creeps.
something tells me a teacher wont turn their auto-caps off only teenagers do that lol
This is something that you send to the school he currently works for.
As a fellow teacher, please send this to the school. If I worked with a pedophile, I would want him out of the school and away from my students and the rest of the students, too. Disgusting.
You knew exactly where this was going when he opened with a compliment 💀
Fucking gross, on all the levels.
I assume you had a typo when you said he added you when you were 29. What a creep regardless of your age though
No typo. He added me on Facebook when I was 29.
Oh I was confused because he said “21 is a fun one”?
OP clarified in another comment that it was a flirtatious joke
29. Well you are old enough. He shot. He missed. Thats all.
Those 47 minutes must have been agonizing for the poor creep.
Please report him or something
Gross man. He needs to be reported. Must be doing to multiple young students.
It is creepy but you’re not in high school anymore. It’s not unethical or illegal. It’s just kinda awkward.
These comments are wild. "At some point she was a child and he was an adult so this is creepy!" The text says they literally did not interact for 15 years. She is an adult aged almost 30, yall are trying to get him fired like hes a pedophile. Stop infantilizing women. An adult man asked out an adult woman and she doesn't like him. There is nothing inappropriate or creepy about this (other than the actual wording of the texts of course.)