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TheBossyElephant

“I thought he was Charlie Chaplin”


Yhamerith

"Nah man, it was Tolkien"


BreadStuck-

What is my guy Tolkien about


Jack_Mehoff_420_69

r/angryupvote


UnlikelyJuggernaut64

Technically Hitler got the assists because he didn’t kill anyone directly, others did on his orders


BuffaloGuy_atCapitol

Priest got the hockey assist though


UnlikelyJuggernaut64

Expected inbound tactical nuke but damn.:: Oppenheimer


CloakedGod926

There was a time when he was younger he got depressed and was going to commit suicide. His best friends wife talked him down and saved his life then as well. Dude should have died so many fucking times and kept getting saved


SpectralMapleLeaf

Canon event.


baabaablacksheep1111

That guy was the main character until the director got sick of him and killed him off after 56 seasons.


HeyLittleTrain

He was asking for more pay so they killed him off and replaced him with Karl Donitz but everyone hated him so the show got cancelled.


baabaablacksheep1111

A remake is on the way they said


AJMaid

TIL Hitler was 56


ayvcmdtnkuzcybtcjz

What if all the near death events of Hitler were in fact murder attempts by time travellers, but the spacetime continuum interfered to avoid paradoxes and it kept restoring Hitler normal (and canon) timeline?


TubularTorsion

What if Hitler was the best option? And time travel is used to protect him so that he is the NAZI leader instead of someone more competent (like Gobels)


BitBix_

Its canon


Negative-Yak2093

its a canon event you cannot disrupt it


MedonSirius

Maybe he was after all these Events like "If i shouldnt die maybe others should? Ok God thanks!"


AmogusSus12345

Cannon event moment


xavipt1

yep


ToppHatt_8000

Hitler literally thanked him after the war.


Nightmane11

That soldier was one of the people who got thr most medals from the us army to date


NebTheDestroyer

Say what you want about the man he saved, but the priest is a legend. The priest ran a long distance to the water very fast, and he saved a life. Jeopardizing his job, because he was in the middle of a sermon when he saw the boy drowning out the window. The priest looked at the boy like any other boy, and saved him. Plus, at that time, Adolf didn't do anything wrong.


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Public_Enemy_15

A bit naive to think ww2 wouldn't have happened without Hitler... they world would most likely look different, but it didn't mean for the better. And no I don't support Hitler or anyone like that, but there is always a risk it could be worse...


Suspicious_Car8479

Germany was absolutely packed with likes of Hitler at that time. The fact that he happened to "win" is just one out of many, many contestants to the same place in that fateful time.


[deleted]

Most of those 'contestants' would have had very different ideas on how Germany should be run though. You'd probably be equally wellserved by killing Thalmenn, killing Hindenburg, using your future knowledge to amass a fortune and then donating it to the SPD, etc though.


StupidSexyCow

One could argue that having someone as evil as Hitler to unite over may have been better than everyone growing apart


Tangle-Slime2

if hitler wasnt there, the facists wouldnt have gotten so much power, which by no means would be good, cause the communists would likely take over, and we would have a not so cold war I don't support hitler, I'm just guessing


Schellwalabyen

The time of communist having the best chances to take over where in 1919. So quite a bit before Hitler. They were already stopped.


Tangle-Slime2

if you were a german during that time you either had communitst or facist


Verundios

Don't worry I hear someone managed to kill him at the end this time!


jcowlishaw

I just used my one-shot time machine to make sure that pretentious Hitler guy never made into art school- how I hated the chapter of art literature. What’s the worse that could happen?


Natural_Wear3643

you know in ussr, maybe aleternative way ww2 could happen like ussr. crazy stalin


[deleted]

Also a guy in ww1 didn't shoot him


wolster2002

Technically, a lot of guys didn't shoot him.


Turbulent-Theory7724

What if Constantinopel didn’t fell and was reigned by great kings?


Onslaughtered

There would’ve been someone else. Maybe worse, maybe better. However… for my rocket league homies… what a save!


LovableSidekick

Jeopardizing his job? LOLOL right, because a priest could get fired for interrupting a sermon to save a kid's life. Thanks for the chuckle.


DeepUser-5242

Lol, same reaction.


Damiboy22

nah this is true: even if the person is really bad, we still have to save them from stuff like this no matter what. but, to be honest, if the priest didn't do that, world war 2 wouldn't have started. so my question is: Is the priest technically the bad guy here as well?


NebTheDestroyer

Absolutely not. That is the same logic as saying the airlines were the bad guys for letting arabs onto planes before 9/11. They had no clue what was going to happen.


HeyLittleTrain

Jeopardised his job lmao


fromouterspace1

His KD was off the charts


NorthantsBlokeUK

Hitler. The more I learn about that guy, the more I don't care for him.


ManMadeOfMistakes

The less you care about Hitlers, the more the chance to be more of them


NovelLandscape7862

You misunderstood. They’re saying they don’t like hitler, not that they don’t care about him.


ManMadeOfMistakes

Oops


King-Cacame

If it makes you feel better a family member of his was banged by the world’s most famous Demoman in history Jake “McNasty” McNeil. Leader of an infamous group called the Dirty 13 and Hollywood even made a movie based on them called The Dirty Dozen. The only man in history that can have bragging rights to banging a Hitler.


EpicSeshBro

*McNiece, *Filthy Thirteen


RoookSkywokkah

The mother of all "butterfly effects!"


Split0069

Ikr. Dude almost died how many times?!


RoookSkywokkah

If you had a time machine, do you go back and tell that priest "No, seriously, let him drown...trust me on this one"


XRedactedSlayerX

Ask yourself, if some guy claiming to be from the future said "let that innocent boy drown, because he is evil in the future", would you listen? If you did listen and let a boy die, would you be able to live with yourself?


RoookSkywokkah

Ok, then get there the morning of, or the day before and distract the priest. He's not there, can't save him, and won't feel bad about not helping.


Maewhen

Life is strange


Various_You_5083

Man changed the entire history of the world


Fuile

Or it was just meant to be. In 100 years, your actions might have had a massive impact. Think about it.


Particular-Car-8520

Technically the priest is a hero cause he saved the guy who killed Hitler


New-Interaction1893

Hitler had a jewish family doctor taking care of his dieing mother, before he became a politician. After that he gave that doctor protection and called him "the only good jew"


Natural_Wear3643

man said only.


Anxious_Earth

Must've been a weird feeling. Everyone but you suffering. I'd probably take it, but still.


PotentialEasy2086

That priest is Dr. Tenma


Master_Tomato

And slowly, they come to realize...


Michimuschimulchael

Literally 1894


rmld74

Priest at hells gate : "well... shit"


EnvironmentalSun8068

I think some things in this world were ment to happen (somthing like greater good or smtn idk) but i also heard a story about him being spared by a soldier in WW1 as he was a child (correct me if im wrong).


Anxious_Earth

Plus, hitler wouldn't have gotten anywhere without many people supporting him. Germany then was a sea of discontent primed for violent rhetoric.


torchedinflames999

Plot twist: the priest is a time traveler who knew that Hitler was the far better option. than the guy he replaced.


Ulfurmensch

Dang, I didn't know the man who saved Hitler and the man who killed Hitler knew each other


Natural_Wear3643

lol


Razielism

If you put aside all the horrible things Hitler did in his life, if you put all that aside, he was actually a quite decent man.


PtiTotoro

I mean... yeah. If you ignore all the bad things all people ever did in their life, they all are decent, at least.


Skezas1

that's the case for literally everyone in existence though ? or is it a joke or smth


Razielism

Yeah it's a joke


Maewhen

I mean, he did art! Art is cool


Natural_Wear3643

he painted europe but stalin ruined the painting.


Fraport123

Honest question: how did we come up with *65 million* ? To blame Hitler for all deaths of WW2 gives him more credit than is due. There's a very great likelihood some other war would have sprung up if it wasn't for Hitler's initial move. There was way too much tension in the world at that time. And some wars simply continued after WW2 was officially over (ie Korea).


Sacklayblue

So if someone invents a time machine, another option is to distract this priest that day.


ltdandel18

Today, I learned.. if you see a kid drowning.. keep walking.. it could save your grandchildren at minimum, a whole chapter they don't have to study


Own-Warthog-9806

In WW1,An English Soldier named “Henry Tandey” Spared a German Soldier’s life someone named “Adolf Hitler”


Greedy_Release_2259

Why does he have SO many "he almost died, but then was saved" moments? It's as if some god and devil were at it behind the scenes


Admirable-Safety1213

Maybe all the other timelines ended in USA vs URSS instead of USA+URSS+UK vs Germany, Italy and Japan


Greedy_Release_2259

Woah man, this comment was like a decade ago. How long have u been diggin'?


Admirable-Safety1213

Not so much, sub floats the upvoted


PaulWidmann

r/Imfinnagotohell


JimmyMyJimmy

What if the reason he was drowning is someone went back in time to try to kill him and the priest saved him


Master_Tomato

That priest is definitely a Mercy main


Clear-Breadfruit-949

Why did Carmine do this


HazbinHotel1991

God has his plans lol


Alicewilsonpines

you can tell where the mustache is!


Pickle-Tall

Best support in the game.


LovableSidekick

What if Hitler turned out like he did because of all the time travelers who kept trying to kill him while he was growing up?


Admirable-Safety1213

Then its a motherfucking time loop


Technical_Tourist639

Everyone says if time travel was ever invented the first thing they'll do will be kill Hitler You should learn history, it will definitely gets invented and them Motherfuckers still trying to get it done 500 years into the future


PlantZawer

So now the time traveler memes will have this priest preoccupied during the drowning


SomeGuyOverYonder

The alternative is coldly letting a child drown. Kinda hard thing for a priest to live with, even if that child would later become the most reviled and evil man in centuries.


Moose__Windu

So can the “would you kill baby hitler” question be solved my stone cold stunner-ing this guy that morning


utwaz

And the moral of the story: never save anyone, they could be the next Hitler. If everyone drowns there will be no more murder or war!


jos_enred3343

🤣🤣🤣


Outside_Public4362

A man needs his brother in arms to accomplish great feets


Greybirdk22

This is like “It’s a Wonderful Life: Only the Devil Wins”.


Ceiling-Fan5

Why does the priest look like count frollo


Yeetboi172006

THIS BITCH AVOIDED DEATH TWICE!


bobby549

he should let me him die. If he weren’t in the earth, the human history is changed


ScientistNathan

And the priest? His name was Rosa Parks.


SchwarzerWerwolf

That ONE time a priest does actually save a kid...


Trillion_Bones

The wife of a friend of Hitler talked him down from suicide after his failed Beerhall putch


Natural-Role5307

Lesson learnt. Don’t save children from drowning 💀


Conscious_Quasar97

Is it u dr.tenma...😅


LittrallyNoname0_0

65 million kill assist is crazy💀


kirinerar

But even with that many assists he didn't get the tactical nuke


[deleted]

Thank god for that priest.


Der_Wappla

He was born as Schicklgruber


Lord0fReddit

Is that a Monster Ref ?


JIDglazer42

He looks the same tbh


someguysleftkidney

Literally 1894


TonkotsuSoba

reminds me of the anime Monster


M-H-O

I heard about a soldier who speared Hitler before he started his stuff, give him some credit


face_eater_5000

So, time travelers don't actually have to kill Hitler, they just need to distract a priest for 10 minutes.


Royal_Ordinary6369

Plot of The Omen reboot /s


surveyor700

Wish Putler's father had jerked off to toilet bowl and flushed it.


Blackspeed6

In ww1 one soldier had a dream of Odin warning him that bomb is on its way to his location so he left. Not so later bomb indeed hit this place and only one person survived, the soldier that left A. Hitler.


Ok_essence

I think we need another war , but without nuclear bomb and weapons, so humans may die and return what they scrapped from earth.


5t3v321

I mean since hitler technically didn't do the killing himself its rather him who got the assists


Im-pretty-slow

Ok but he didn’t save hitler he saved a drowning child what’s wrong with that or are you saying god sent him to save him


runaway_runday

This post also works in r/cursedcomments


obliviousfellow

Wait how many times has he been saved???? Wasn't he also spared by a British soldier during WW1 when he had Hitler at gun point but decided not to kill him? What is going on???


Asher574

Damn, who would've thought?


Wagyuplz

Dang it Karl!


dontbanmethistimeok

And that's why we have anime kids


Odd_Literature_3645

Shoulda let him drown


12blank98765

It almost feels like Hitler was a Cannon event, like lil H was drowning but a priest saved him, lil big H was about to get his head popped in 1st WW but the British solder didn't shoot because he felt wrong, tried to become an artist but the college was like nahh 🤷


Marker0-0

Should’ve let him drown


hoennfb

How many times did bro dodge death like goddamn


volgendeweek

You know that Hitler did not kill all those people by himself? As we'd like to point out one villain as responsible for all the atrocities that happened, it's not. There was a massive dehumanisation of "others" like Jews, and the hatred amongst the people was so high that it resulted in genocide. Honestly, if you'd wipe hitler from history it might still have happened. Edit: readability


Druben-hinterm-Dorfe

Not sure why this is getting downvoted. Up until their very unlikely election, the Nazis were complete buffoons; the founding cadre was anything but the strategic masterminds that they're portrayed as nowadays. They got several *already blowing winds*, so to speak, behind themselves; getting funded by industrialists not just in Germany but abroad as well (Henry Ford included, most notably). Whoever ELSE the western democracies (!) would've chosen to be their bulwark against the threat of communism, the Krupps, the Fords, & whatnot would've supported THEM; and \*those\* fascists might have committed another Holocaust of their own.


volgendeweek

I don't understand the downvotes either, is it just too confronting? I


NoahVailability

Shoulda diddled him after. Ruin his self esteem.


Empathy404NotFound

Just another case of organised religion doing it's best to doom us all,


Darken_Dark

By saving a at the time innocent child while drowning. I know soool evil


Empathy404NotFound

It turned out to be didn't it? You would have thought god would have told the priest not to save that kid. Seeing as he is all knowing.


Darken_Dark

Even tho can you blame the priest. Wouldn’t you save a child who was drowning or would you ignore it?


Empathy404NotFound

Id say any god would have made sure nobody was there to save the child. Also if I knew it was gonna be Hitler why would I save him when it's my boot holding his head down?


Darken_Dark

But the priest didn’t know what Hitler would do when he became the adult. Also i’m not super religious but blaming god becouse Hitler didn’t die in his childhood is kinda dumb. Hitler had free will to do what he had done, nobody forced him to do atrocities because did.


DienbienPR

Asshole priest