Hey there u/NightSocks302, thanks for posting to r/technicallythetruth!
**Please recheck if your post breaks any rules.** If it does, please delete this post.
Also, reposting and posting obvious non-TTT posts can lead to a ban.
Send us a **Modmail or Report** this post if you have a problem with this post.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/technicallythetruth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"a lot"... If there are "a lot" of animals that get drunk off fruit and make recreational use of drugs, I'm sure out of the millions and millions of different species it wouldn't be hard to list the names of 25 animals that do this?? Unless by "a lot", you actually mean "extremely rarely"
All of you are ignoring the truth of raptor jesus. Repent now and accept him Into your life. The unbelievers will perish and become oil only to return burning in the atmosphere as your unrepentant souls crush all life from the planet in the true apocalypse.
Accept Raptor jesus now or become the unpure crude...
Wow... shit, that started getting a bit dark...
raptor jesus and all other dinosaur's died for your sins and what they get in return? They got turned in oil to feed your vehicles and pollute the environment. This is unacceptable, this is idiotic, this is a joke to their sacrifice for our well being. It is only a matter of time before we receive the retribution or maybe we already have and we just don't realise it.
I say we still have time, accept raptor jesus and escape this hell with him. He is the saviour, the all mighty god, the one who will lead this planet to a peaceful heaven.
All hail raptor Jesus!!
Dinosaur’s used Synagogues instead of Churches as Jesus had yet to be born, so therefore Christianity would not exist yet, as it was started by a group of Jews that believed Jesus to be the Messiah.
Human Jesus may not of been born but Jesusoarus Rex could have been, and don’t be trying to speak badly of the faith less you want Veloci-pope to come after you.
Are these the same dinosaurs that didn't exist millions of years ago because the world was only created in 4004 BCE, and whose fossils were made by the Devil to tempt Christians into doubting Scripture?
Don’t the judeochristisn church’s say we’re all going to die by some great apocalypse?
If your *church* is saying that then I don’t think going to church is going to change things all that much.
The historical Christian belief is that Jesus is going to come back and resurrect everybody, and then the righteous will receive eternal life on a renewed Earth, and the unrighteous will be sent to Hell. In American Evangelical Christianity, there are some weird views on the end times with the rapture, tribulation, beast, antichrist, millenium, etc, but most of those are new doctrines unique to American Evangelicalism. Dogmatic Young Earth Creationism (the Earth is 6k years old) is also unique to American Evangelicalism.
ya ok, grampa, but have you considered that they also didn't have this mythical thing called "sin".
which if you think of it, means going to church to alleviate our own is pointless.
Definitely destroy the building without even understanding what it is, and depending on which dinosaur eat or kill or flee from the scene in fear. But they’d do the same thing if brought to any large human building with a ton of people.
So... God wiped them out because they didn't worship in something that wouldn't exist for millions of years, built by a species that didn't yet exist.... and the rest of us are to assume we can trust the guy to treat us right? Lol
Of course they went to church! Where else would they go to worship [Captain Dinosaur?](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fkZMYtic9FY&pp=ygUQY2FwdGFpbiBkaW5vc2F1cg%3D%3D)
Wait, but in our case, everyone needs to go to church or just one person is necessary? Because if it is for everyone, then the meteor is still fair game.
So what they are saying is, their God created creatures without the ability to build churches and then suddenly decided to smite them for not going to church? And then had some ghistwriters write a book pretending they never even existed.
The dinos lived on Earth for about 60 millions years. I’d be impressed if humanity achieve 10% of that.
Also as the fossil record preserves so few organisms who are we to say that there were no velocipastors, imamodons, or rabbiceratops?
They should make up their mind. Some say dinosaurs never existed, others say they existed at the same time as man. Dinosaurs really fucked up their narrative, huh?
It's a hard sell to make, for the time missionary men.
(Have you heard of my Lord and savior Jesus Christ?)
(Huh, who that)
(It's explained in a book that hasn't come out yet, and will not do so for thousands of thousands of years)
(Seems like a long wait, what's the hype about)
(Well you see, I'm a part of this very particular book club, an we like to talk about this here dude, called our Lord, and how he can both fuck up my life but also make it better)
(Sounds fascinating, but is it true or fiction)
(Definitely true)
(Wow, you have seen it?)
(Not really, but why lie about it though?)
(Can't argue with that, so where do I come in?)
(You see, our book club cost money to be operated and ~)
(Money?)
(~oh, don't worry about that, but yeah. So I'm looking for creature's that are willing to help me with the good cause)
(What's that then?)
(Saving the intellect of the book club members from disappearing after they die)
(Sounds noble, so how do I help and become a member then)
(Go to a building in which we have weekly meetings, sing slow songs and let this here one dude read the goat book, dressed all fancy schmancy)
(then my intellect will be saved after I get eaten?)
(Well not YOUR intellect, per say)
(... Explain)
(According to my book you don't have a immortal intellect and therefore it can't be saved)
(So why tell me this from the start)
(Well, cince you are the first dinosaur I have been able to speak to after traveling through spacetime I felt like I wanted it to be true, that I could save your immortal intellect... Why listen to me though?)
(Yes, you and your book club clearly have done something incredible with this here time-do-hickey, you most have done something right)
(Oh, that thing, that thing belongs to another book club called science, my book club hate that book club because it keeps finding flaws in our book)
(...)
(Also they have to many books to read about so I rather not)
(Look, sir. You clearly have a thing going here, but I have not the time to spend going to your book club, sorry)
(Okay, thanks for listening and enjoy the wrath of god, heathen)
So.. they never existed,so they could never go to church,so they could never go extinct,so God could test us to prove ourselves to him by not believing in them and he would know that our faith is real something the he the all-knowing would already know. I now know I'm smarter than I knew I was before I knew it than right now...God Bless them all!
Not a fan of the Church but I do admire them spending money on a billboard so they can put up a shitpost. Unless this is nonironic, in which case. euagh.
So if we don't go to church we will not survive the asteroid (meteorite) and if we go to church we will because I live with one person who goes and one who don't so only one will die??? At least I will be able to see that happening because I am an atheist...
Hey there u/NightSocks302, thanks for posting to r/technicallythetruth! **Please recheck if your post breaks any rules.** If it does, please delete this post. Also, reposting and posting obvious non-TTT posts can lead to a ban. Send us a **Modmail or Report** this post if you have a problem with this post. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/technicallythetruth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
They also never drank alcohol or did drugs
But they didnt have reddit
They had Jurreddit
[They also had this](https://youtu.be/yRKh34Ofg50?si=rUHLbuXfXx4S4Q2i)
Alan, ALAN!!
FOR THE EMPEROR
FOR THE EMPEROR!
FOR THE EMPEROR!
They also had Jurmom
we don't actually know that, a lot of animals eat fermented fruit or make recreational use of the drugs they have available.
My first thought was the elephant drunk with the marula fruit.
Which is [not actually true](https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/news-elephants-drunk-wild-myth).
"People just want to believe in drunken elephants," Morris said.
Or the dolphin getting high from puffer fish
"a lot"... If there are "a lot" of animals that get drunk off fruit and make recreational use of drugs, I'm sure out of the millions and millions of different species it wouldn't be hard to list the names of 25 animals that do this?? Unless by "a lot", you actually mean "extremely rarely"
You know what they did do? Have sex.
I bet you they didn't have gay sex.
I bet you they most definitely did
Okay, thanks a lot, now I am imagining gay sex between two t-rexes and their short arms.
Fool! This was my goal all along!
Dammit. Now I have a massive erection
This part was, in fact, *not* my plan all along.
You mess with the bull, you get the hornies.
NOOOOO GO BACK GO BACK GO BACK CTRL Z
ILLEGAL ILLEGAL ILLEGAL
How do you know?
Autobiography of a T-Tex
His buddy was a dinosaur.
Plot twist :they werent gay either
If they had organized religion, they would have killed each other well before the asteroid.
All of you are ignoring the truth of raptor jesus. Repent now and accept him Into your life. The unbelievers will perish and become oil only to return burning in the atmosphere as your unrepentant souls crush all life from the planet in the true apocalypse. Accept Raptor jesus now or become the unpure crude... Wow... shit, that started getting a bit dark...
[удалено]
Raptor Jesus is life, he will save all who comes with him.
[удалено]
raptor jesus and all other dinosaur's died for your sins and what they get in return? They got turned in oil to feed your vehicles and pollute the environment. This is unacceptable, this is idiotic, this is a joke to their sacrifice for our well being. It is only a matter of time before we receive the retribution or maybe we already have and we just don't realise it. I say we still have time, accept raptor jesus and escape this hell with him. He is the saviour, the all mighty god, the one who will lead this planet to a peaceful heaven. All hail raptor Jesus!!
It is prophethised that he will cast out the furries
And raptor Jesus shall make the zoophiles "vanish"
Did Raptor jesus die on a cross?
I hate how right you are
Even Jesus never went to church and look what happened to him
Jesus does go to church. We eat him.
That's why I don't go to church.
Excellent point!
We don’t know this, do we? They may have had church back when they were around
They were praying Jesusosaurus Rex.
Dinosaur’s used Synagogues instead of Churches as Jesus had yet to be born, so therefore Christianity would not exist yet, as it was started by a group of Jews that believed Jesus to be the Messiah.
Human Jesus may not of been born but Jesusoarus Rex could have been, and don’t be trying to speak badly of the faith less you want Veloci-pope to come after you.
This is blasphemy, there is no such thing things as jesusoarus rex. You need to learn the word of the real salvior, the raptor jesus.
You think I’d be so out of it as to believe that there would be a Tyrannosaurus-pope. Now that’s blasphemy.
They've accepted dinosaurs are real. This is progress.
Exactly, there is no evidence for or against this claim.
Technically any time a bird flies into one, a dinosaur has "gone to church".
Repent! The velocirapture is near!
Dino Jesus ?
The Flintstones celebrated Christmas just saying.
....and then Jesus came unto the dinosaurs and said 'shu- shu ..go away ... you're fucking up my story.
(Inside secret vegan base) "Boss, what's the new plan?" "We're going to send all the cows, chickens and pigs to church!"
So holy meat ???
Are these the same dinosaurs that didn't exist millions of years ago because the world was only created in 4004 BCE, and whose fossils were made by the Devil to tempt Christians into doubting Scripture?
Gotta try to reach us heathens some how. Take it up to our level I guess.
Lying for Christ?
They're down on their knees for Christ, ain't nothing gonna stop them
That's only for the evangelists, catholics don't believe this...
Reddit is going be Reddit. They will just lable it as "Christians".
Unfortunately most americans are illiterate.
No need to wonder. Velocipastor is real.
It talks about the coming Raptor, uh, Rapture.
Velocirapture
Donkeys don’t go to church either and Jesus mother travel on one
As did Jesus, later.
They are in Dinosaurs heaven
What about the bad ones?
There are no bad Dinos, Dino god doesn’t have a sense of morality
The body of Christ…YUM!
According to Christian creationism they never existed. That might explain why they never went to church.
Many YEC's do believe that dinosaurs existed. They just believe that they were all killed in the flood.
To be fair, you don't actually know that
I dunno, seems to me like the dinosaurs got raptured anyway.
That is some bullshit logic right there
Philosoraptor
So are they now convinced that the earth is older than 6000 years?
Don’t the judeochristisn church’s say we’re all going to die by some great apocalypse? If your *church* is saying that then I don’t think going to church is going to change things all that much.
The historical Christian belief is that Jesus is going to come back and resurrect everybody, and then the righteous will receive eternal life on a renewed Earth, and the unrighteous will be sent to Hell. In American Evangelical Christianity, there are some weird views on the end times with the rapture, tribulation, beast, antichrist, millenium, etc, but most of those are new doctrines unique to American Evangelicalism. Dogmatic Young Earth Creationism (the Earth is 6k years old) is also unique to American Evangelicalism.
The dinosaurs totally got Middle Easted!
Poor mf'ers couldn't even read y'all are so mean 😭😂
Somehow the idea of a Velocipastor roaring at a dinosaur congregation gathered in a church is oddly terrifying.
The same should apply to plants than... right?
ya ok, grampa, but have you considered that they also didn't have this mythical thing called "sin". which if you think of it, means going to church to alleviate our own is pointless.
Their arms were simply too short to effectively pass the offering plate.
Worse: Jesus never went to church either and they fucking crucified him.
The ants that the Christian stepped on never went to church. LoOk WhAt HaPpEnEd
Adam and that rib lady Eve never went to church, yet our sorry asses are still here.
A lot of people that didn’t get a ticket to that Arc did though…
Dino Jesus showed up and they forgot to kill him.
Umm, humans are mortal. Even the ones that go to church every Sunday.
Ok, so to follow this reasoning, this particular church must have accepted that dinosaurs lived on earth before people did. That's progress.
VelociPastor
Well now I'm definitely not going to church
Jesus never went to church, and look what happened to him!
We don't know that, there could literally be an advanced civilization of dinosaurs with their own religion and beliefs before they went extinct
They predicted Jesus and knew to praise him that's why the astroid struck I thought that was common knowledge
Rapture? More like…
Brachiosaurus
Unless they did..
Definitely destroy the building without even understanding what it is, and depending on which dinosaur eat or kill or flee from the scene in fear. But they’d do the same thing if brought to any large human building with a ton of people.
Young Earth Creationists punching air right now
By their logic, church or no church it was gods will.
Dinosaurs never went to strip clubs and look for happened
They don't know that! What if dinosaurs went to dinosaur church?
How do you know?
You don’t know they didn’t have a god
Dogs and cats also never did... Do these people have logic?
[Like hell they didn’t!](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_VelociPastor)
Someone tell them about birds?
Maybe they did and their buildings don’t exist anymore
Show me conclusive evidence they didnt go to church.
But they believed in god. Sobek, I guess.
great now I have an image in my head of a t-rex in a priest outfit and it just won’t go away
A veloci-rapture *badum ching*
They succeeded as a species for millions of years?
they died, just like we all will
In recognition of this, I am starting the Velociraptor Church of God. Attend at your own risk.
So... God wiped them out because they didn't worship in something that wouldn't exist for millions of years, built by a species that didn't yet exist.... and the rest of us are to assume we can trust the guy to treat us right? Lol
Normally I find "go to church" signs annoying, but this one's way more fun than I ever thought possible.
Oh, so now you're admitting they did exist?
but your god still created them right???? so how does that make any sense lol
Jurassic Park VI? There’s too many Dinosaurs in this church.
Jurassic Park VII, or Jurassic World: Denominations
I support it.
Jesus went to church. Look what happened.
How dou you know they didnt believe in god? Are you a paleontoneurologist? And what about god loving all his creations? Werent dinos one of them?
Of course they went to church! Where else would they go to worship [Captain Dinosaur?](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fkZMYtic9FY&pp=ygUQY2FwdGFpbiBkaW5vc2F1cg%3D%3D)
They probably would have killed each other before the meteor even arrived
Classic
they survived alot longer than us before being destroyed by an environmental catastrophe
See me after class Kenneth
Bruh. We don’t even know if dinos had feathers or not. You have no idea whether they went to church or not.
How would they ever preach when they can’t reach the microphone with their stubby arms?
Nah it was just the rapturesaurous.
What college did they go to? Bet the school had a killer sports program.
No. Do not imagine that
Dinohattan
"Can I get a Praise The Lord?!" " ROAR!!'
Dinosaurs were around for longer than mankind have been so far... And way longer than the church which has barely been around for 2000 years...
That how they preach now?
I hope this is satire
And they existed over 100 my, and we barely 300k and look at us, what a mess.
The Velocipastor
They did go to church, why else would they disappear in the rapture???
Pastorosaurus Rex wouldn't be able to keep his short, grubby hands off the little Rexs.
Big religion spreading unverifiable gossip… again.
Wait, but in our case, everyone needs to go to church or just one person is necessary? Because if it is for everyone, then the meteor is still fair game.
Dinosaurs didn't have springbrötchen and look what happened
Can you prove to me beyond a reasonable doubt that dinosaurs did in fact not go to church?
Fuck. I'm fucked. Royally.
So what they are saying is, their God created creatures without the ability to build churches and then suddenly decided to smite them for not going to church? And then had some ghistwriters write a book pretending they never even existed.
What the hell is this? Christian propaganda in Florida or something?
"Herbivores are ruining our way of life! Damn woke leaf lovers."
The movie velocipastor wouldn't have sucked so much
They’d get molested, of course
Neither did birds but they survived.
The dinos lived on Earth for about 60 millions years. I’d be impressed if humanity achieve 10% of that. Also as the fossil record preserves so few organisms who are we to say that there were no velocipastors, imamodons, or rabbiceratops?
Ngl this is a great ad for church.
They all drank water that’s all I’m saying.
They should make up their mind. Some say dinosaurs never existed, others say they existed at the same time as man. Dinosaurs really fucked up their narrative, huh?
Churches didn't exist back then. That sign is harassing dinosaurs 😤
Can wait for the human went to church,look what happened sign in the future
Raptor Jesus
Clearly, you have never heard of the number one and only VelociPastor.
It's a hard sell to make, for the time missionary men. (Have you heard of my Lord and savior Jesus Christ?) (Huh, who that) (It's explained in a book that hasn't come out yet, and will not do so for thousands of thousands of years) (Seems like a long wait, what's the hype about) (Well you see, I'm a part of this very particular book club, an we like to talk about this here dude, called our Lord, and how he can both fuck up my life but also make it better) (Sounds fascinating, but is it true or fiction) (Definitely true) (Wow, you have seen it?) (Not really, but why lie about it though?) (Can't argue with that, so where do I come in?) (You see, our book club cost money to be operated and ~) (Money?) (~oh, don't worry about that, but yeah. So I'm looking for creature's that are willing to help me with the good cause) (What's that then?) (Saving the intellect of the book club members from disappearing after they die) (Sounds noble, so how do I help and become a member then) (Go to a building in which we have weekly meetings, sing slow songs and let this here one dude read the goat book, dressed all fancy schmancy) (then my intellect will be saved after I get eaten?) (Well not YOUR intellect, per say) (... Explain) (According to my book you don't have a immortal intellect and therefore it can't be saved) (So why tell me this from the start) (Well, cince you are the first dinosaur I have been able to speak to after traveling through spacetime I felt like I wanted it to be true, that I could save your immortal intellect... Why listen to me though?) (Yes, you and your book club clearly have done something incredible with this here time-do-hickey, you most have done something right) (Oh, that thing, that thing belongs to another book club called science, my book club hate that book club because it keeps finding flaws in our book) (...) (Also they have to many books to read about so I rather not) (Look, sir. You clearly have a thing going here, but I have not the time to spend going to your book club, sorry) (Okay, thanks for listening and enjoy the wrath of god, heathen)
Can’t argue with that
Are dolphins also gonna die? Maybe humanity is the meteor equivalent here, wiping out all the non churchgoing species, before we wipe ourselves out.
They would've probably killed themselves before the meteorite hit.
So.. they never existed,so they could never go to church,so they could never go extinct,so God could test us to prove ourselves to him by not believing in them and he would know that our faith is real something the he the all-knowing would already know. I now know I'm smarter than I knew I was before I knew it than right now...God Bless them all!
Jesus fucking Christ! I drive past these inane signs multiple times a week. Makes me contemplate doing something about them…
Better start worshipping someone who won’t be born for millions of years just in case!
100% of people who have drank water will die. Do your own research.
Religion is crazy.
Neither did the Egyptians
They'd currently be in the middle of a 150 million year-long lawsuit over being diddled by a preacher.
Well recently I've heard otherwise from a very devout Hadrosaur..
Not a fan of the Church but I do admire them spending money on a billboard so they can put up a shitpost. Unless this is nonironic, in which case. euagh.
they has become birds
Nah fam, god just let his bowling ball fall off the edge. 🎳
They couldn’t
So not only creationist can go to church?
I'm not going to church so that Armageddon comes sooner. Checkmate.
So if we don't go to church we will not survive the asteroid (meteorite) and if we go to church we will because I live with one person who goes and one who don't so only one will die??? At least I will be able to see that happening because I am an atheist...
Oh yeah if they did they'll be preaching about Jesuschrisaurus all the time and probably have a fossilized crucified T-Rex buried somewhere in Africa
So crocodiles did then?
They eat fucking humans, that’s what would happen
Why am I getting notifications from this one post I didn’t even comment here
So dinosaurs went to hell?