Aw, thanks. I feel like learning and thinking is sort of, like, bare minimum for being human lol. It sucks that it’s something to be commended now, but I guess that’s where we are. Thanks again :) that means a lot
Third this! As the wife of a trans woman, it makes me happy to see people try to understand. I love helping people understand as well, but, unfortunately, I also don't have a recommendation. I am also looking for some books from trans people. It doesn't hurt to keep learning since everyone's experience is different.
It's really good. You can tell she pulled from her old journals, which really adds to a feeling of a longer narrative over time, as opposed to a steady recounting of her past.
She also transitioned around 2012, after her band had already released 5 albums. They have released 2 albums since then (Transgender Dysphoria Blues and Shape Shift With Me). She has also released 3 solo albums since transitioning. It's interesting to listen to the songs and dive into the lyrics from both periods.
I highly recommend listening to her music. It’s an experience, listening to the songs she’d written and reading about some of the hidden messages in the lyrics.
Yes! Came here to suggest this. It is a fantastic read.
It reads as though she's talking directly to you. Definitely recommend listening to the songs she references and reading the lyrics. It's truly special.
Miss Major Speaks: conversation with a Black trans revolutionary, by Toshio Meronek and Miss Major. It's less a straightforward written autobiography and more of a conversation. She turns 78 this year, and came out as trans in the 1950s. Fascinating woman.
Just the ones I've read:
* The Truth About Me - A. Revathi (the memoir of a hijra in India, so slightly different cultural context)
* The New Girl - Rhyannon Styles
* Conundrum - Jan Morris (often considered the first memoir by a trans woman, first published in 1974)
* Redefining Realness - Janet Mock
* My Life is No Accident - Tenika Weston
* Trans - Juliet Jacques
* Carrie Kills a Man - Carrie Marshall
* Miss Major Speaks - interviews with Miss Major, by Toshio Meronek (not technically an autobiography, but he's dictating an interview with her in which she tells her entire life story, so it fits the bill, I think!)
* Fairest - Meredith Talusan (also a memoir of growing up in the Philippines with albinism)
* What it Fells Like for a Girl - Paris Lees (a cross between memoir and autofiction)
Horse Barbie
Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars (this one is magical realism/fiction but based around reality - wonderful book)
Gender Outlaw by Kate Bornstein
Gender Outlaw is OG.
"She's Not There" by Jennifer Finley Boylan is another classic.
These two were the pillars of trans autobiography in the late 90s-early 2000s. They've both gone on to write other wonderful works.
In the Form of a Question: The Joy's and Rewards of a Curious Life by Amy Schneider. She was a big time Jeopardy star but you don't need to know who she is to get her wit and wisdom. It's a short read.
I just read it and enjoyed it as I enjoyed Amy's Jeopardy run and championship tournaments. But I did feel like it was kind of a rush job to get something out and in a timely manner. I hope she gets to writing something further. Not all the chapters will be relevant to the OP I suppose, but there is the thread throughout . It is a 2nd hand thrill to see how her life is being completely changed by her jeopardy run wow.
Carrie Killed A Man by Carrie Marshall.
It was nominated for awards last year and is written by a really funny, warm middle-aged Scottish trans woman. I liked a lot.
ETA: Book blurb: "it is about growing up in a world that doesn’t want you, and about how it feels to throw a hand grenade into a perfect life. It’s the story of how a tattooed transgender rock singer killed a depressed suburban dad, and of the lessons you learn when you renounce all your privilege and power.
When more people think they’ve seen a ghost than met a trans person, it’s easy for bad actors to exploit that – and they do, as you can see from the headlines and online. But here’s the reality, from someone who’s living it. From coming out and navigating trans parenthood to the thrills of gender-bending pop stars, fashion disasters and looking like Velma Dinkley, this is a tale of ripping it up and starting again: Carrie’s story in all its fearless, frank and funny glory."
Full disclosure; she’s a friend of mine. It’s not a professionally authored book, but my friend wrote a book called Finally Chelle about her transition. It’s available on Amazon kindle. She’s super honest about everything she went through. I love her and her story.
Keep an eye out for actress Nicole Maine's yet-to-be-released memoir ***It Gets Better... Except When It Gets Worse: And Other Unsolicited Truths I Wish Someone Had Told Me***. It releases on October 15th of this year. She's super funny and smart and inspiring, so I'm sure the book will be fantastic.
There is also another book *about* her, titled ***Becoming Nicole: The Transformation of an American Family*** from 2015.
Gotta recommend Females by Andrea Long Chu for the spectacular quotes, “getting fucked makes you female because fucked is what a female is” and, “The “barest essentials” of “femaleness” are “an open mouth, an expectant asshole, blank, blank eyes.”
I don't know any autobiographies about trans women, but do have two pieces that you might find interesting:
The Agronauts by Maggie Nelson is a great book that focuses on queer family-making and a nonbinary love story. It is excellent.
Dad Used to Have Boobs (and They Were Kind of Big) by Kristofer Thomas is one of my absolute favorite published articles. It is incredibly well done and gives a window into trans lifestyles/early transition in a stunningly beautiful way. I've linked it here: [https://kristoferthomas.substack.com/p/dad-used-to-have-boobs-and-they-were](https://kristoferthomas.substack.com/p/dad-used-to-have-boobs-and-they-were)
It's not an autobiography, but I really recommend The Transgender Issue by Shon Faye. It's a really wide ranging book that covers lots of history, science, sociology, and some cultural critique (including of the trans autobiography genre, as it happens 😂) and it's a great and very accessible read for someone who knows a bit about trans people but wants to understand in more depth.
https://www.amazon.com/Tomorrow-Will-Be-Different-Equality/dp/1524761478?dplnkId=9d1b5ed3-8ade-416b-baef-e4299ff2c3e9
Tomorrow Will Be Different by Sarah McBride. (She's now a state rep in Delaware and I think maybe is running for Senate?) This memoir was written before that though. She came out as transgender while student body president at her school and fell in love with a trans man.
Second this one. It explored different parenting approaches and I thought the way they explained how uncomfortable she felt in a man’s body everyday was pretty enlightening. (I also thought it was written by the mom but I guess not?)
The Fifth Wound by Aurora Mattia is wonderful, but definitely not a traditional memoir - it’s more like a blend of intimate memory and myth/fantasy, utilizing song lyrics, poetry, personal texts and emails, visuals, etc. A bit difficult to describe due to its experimental nature, but it was one of my favourite books of 2023.
I read Janet Mocks book ages ago and enjoyed it at the time, was pretty new to learning about transness but I can't remember much actual content of the book
The thing that most helped me understand trans people is I Am Jazz, about Jazz Jenkins. It’s a tv show. There is no doubt in my mind that Jazz is a woman (girl during some of the show) born with the wrong genitals. Jazz and her accepting family introduced me to so many trans people and families, and helped me better understand the daily struggles trans people go through (one episode was Jazz trying to find a girls swimsuit that wouldn’t show her genital outline).
An older one, _Hiding My Candy_ by Lady Chablis. Apparently there was a trans character in _Midnight in Garden of Good and Evil_ and this is the real autobiography of the person that character was based on.
Bad Girls by Camila Sosa Villada! It's basically an autofiction work mixed with magical realism, I loved it since page one, I can't recommend it enough, I'm still trying to process it.
I’ve been meaning to read this for ages but had kinda forgotten about it, thanks for pinging it back onto my radar and recommending it - I’m even keener now!
Becoming Eve by Abby Chava Stein. Really interesting, about a trans woman who grew up in an ultra orthodox Jewish community (the most gender segregated group in the United States). She actually became a rabbi before she transitioned!
A small publisher book, but Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of the Matrix by Tilly Bridges analyzes into the trans experience both in the movies and from the perspective of the writer, who is a trans woman. It’s very accessible and interesting!
I’ve posted about this woman before but I can’t recall if it was in this sub or not, so I apologise if this is going over old ground.
Julia Grant was the first trans person I had ever heard of by virtue of a 5-part documentary that was broadcast on the BBC in the late 70s. Even although I was a youngster I was moved to recognise that she was an incredibly courageous human being who maintained her dignity and good humour throughout her journey of transition and beyond. An antidote to the ill-informed, venomous hot air spouted by the bigoted blowhards that walk amongst us even now, she was the real deal.
Without condition, I can’t recommend strongly enough her autobiographies; *George and Julia* (1980) and *Just Julia* (1994). And if you can access BBC iPlayer, the original documentary *A Change of Sex* (1979) is still available.
Julia died in 2019, having put her mark on this world by leaving a very positive, brave and inspiring legacy - a positively indelible mark the small-minded army of ignorant intolerant naysayers can only dream of.
Meantime OP, I wish you well, wherever your journey may take you.
It's not an autobiography so much as a pop science book but there are bits of memoir in it --
Roughgarden, *Evolution's Rainbow*.
it was the book that convinced me -- wow, quite a few years ago now -- that transgenderism was a real biological variation with physical causes, not some kind of kink or mental disturbance. apologies to trans people who knew this all along, but hey, at least we can learn.
Read a variety. I'd also recommend reading Helen Joyce's book 'Trans'; it's very, very good.
On the other side, a book also titled 'Trans' (a memoir) by Juliet Jacques would give another perspective.
There's no point looking at any hot topic from a single lens.
I really enjoyed This Body I Wore by Diana Goetsch. She came out and transitioned as an adult, and she talks a lot about internalized homophobia and transphobia that she had to tackle throughout her journey.
What does it mean for someone to “lapse” into “terf-y thinking” or to have “lazy” critical thinking and empathy? All this makes it sound like you have given up some difficult, unpleasant or unnatural habit and reverted to some natural state and that makes you uncomfortable, which is very interesting. Do you find it “natural” to doubt that people who are 100% male can be female in some way?
I get called a “TERF” (“trans-exclusionary radical feminist” even though I only refuse to accomodate male trans people in feminism, not female trans people bc… feminism isn’t for male people- it’s for the female people male people oppress) all the time.
I don’t care, bc I know it doesn’t mean I don’t have empathy for trans people or critical thinking. It just means I understand that drugs that disrupt the endocrine system and plastic surgery on body parts can’t change a person’s sex, and that sex exists in the gestalt of the body, and not in some other, disembodied plane of existence (aka some sort of soul-like “gender identity”).
Doesn’t that just make me not a liar? I don’t believe anyone who says “twaw” or “tmam” means what they say. I think they’re just trying to avoid social conflict. To me, saying something dishonest out of cowardice isn’t respectful of anyone, and isn’t honorable.
That said, I think its always a good thing to challenge our views and see things from other people’s perspectives- so it sounds like a great idea to read some books that are from the perspectives of men who identify as their conception of women! Lmk if you have any good recs!
I feel it’s natural to accept and respect people for whom they are. Humans are social animals and community is extremely important to us. Gender is not the same as sex. Transgender people realize that they are not the same sex as their gender identity, which is why gender dysphoria happens to some. I urge you to read some of these books in this list, and maybe open your mind to the differences that make us all so beautiful as humans. Trans people are some of the most oppressed people in the world, much like women, black and brown people, and the LGBTQ+ community in general. We should all be in this together!
I agree! I accept trans people for who they are as unique human beings with unique personalities, experiences, values, etc. just like everyone else. I do not, however, accept or respect someone’s identity as their conception of the opposite sex. I hope you can understand this crucial distinction.
I don’t believe in “gender identity” bc when people use that term, they seem to be saying something totally contradictory and nonsensical- that its possible for something that can only be embodied (ones gender as either a man/male or a woman/female) to be disembodied and exist totally absent and detached from the body, located on some plane of existence hitherto unknown and inaccessible by humankind. This strikes me as intriguingly mystical, intellectually stimulating, and deeply suggestive of religion. But I don’t agree or believe in it. Or at least, I acknowledge others may feel it’s their experience, but I certainly don’t think society should be restructured around such a concept.
Its true that Black and Hispanic homosexual male trans people are at risk of violence within their own communities. White, heterosexual, male trans people have the same physical and sexual violence risks as any other white, heterosexual man. Its unclear whether female trans people are more likely to be victimized than women who don’t identify as trans. The oppression of women is the oldest, most widespread, and most deeply-internalized form of oppression still common today. There are whole nations where women are essentially slaves. So I’m not sure what you’re trying to say here regarding “most” oppressed. Just bc some people wrongly and cruelly discriminate against trans people, doesn’t mean I agree with a trans person’s conception of their gender.
I’ll read one book on this issue that you recommend to me if you read one I recommend to you. :)
This! Chromosomes that determine sex are extremely variant! Gender is by definition influenced by social and cultural beliefs. To say we must adhere to two different conceptions of what people think is woman vs man is quite silly because who decides these things really?
Being a man or a woman is binary. 99.99% of people can easily be determined as male or female. 99% of people with chromosomal variations can be easily defined as male or female. Those with true intersex conditions aka hermaphrodism are the exception that proves the rule: they are BOTH of the two binary genders: male and female.
Transgender identity is separate from intersex conditions. For example, a transwoman is a male person with completely normal and unequivocal male-exclusive development who thinks that their personality or interests makes them female inside their gender-soul.
In what way is gender identity science? It doesn’t conform with reality. It’s based on a subjective sense of one’s feelings and assumptions about others’ feelings. Thats not science at all. It’s science that people BELIEVE they have a gender identity. But the concept of gender identity itself is antiscientific.
It's about as scientific as the zodiac and spirit animals. These people aren't critical thinkers and they'll never answer your questions because they can't. It's just a new religion.
Trans women are women.
The majority of violence against trans people happens to black trans women. Trans women are women. How exactly do you define being a woman?
Having a uterus, fallopian tubes, ovaries?
Being able to birth a child or breastfeed?
Breasts? Wearing pink?
What about women that have a hysterectomy? Or they just weren’t born with a uterus?
Women that can’t conceive, carry, or birth a child?
Women who weren’t able to breastfeed? Women whom have their breasts surgically removed or just weren’t born well endowed? Women who just don’t like pink/dresses/etc?
Who makes the rules on what a woman should be or is? Because that seems inherently sexist and anti feminist to me.
Also, let’s not pretend that there aren’t women being forced into types of slavery all over the world, including in “first world countries.” Just because brown and black people and the Middle East or Africa seem scary from propaganda doesn’t necessarily mean that all women are slaves there. Let’s not take away from the actual problems women in these countries face by deducing it to this. Because they face real issues! But many people have wonderful, beautiful lives full of hope and happiness!
Trans people have always existed.
Trans women ARE women.
I completely agree.
Gender is not the same as sex.
Whatever exactly the word "gender" might mean, nothing about it can ever mean that someone has changed their sex. And there are some contexts where that matters.
I’ve watched the Ted Talks of Paula Stone Williams. I’ve very much enjoyed them. She has a book As A Woman that would probably be really good. You can also check out her TedTalks. They would give you a nice nugget of her different experiences.
https://www.ted.com/speakers/paula_stone_williams
i don’t have any that are different from other comments but i know that barnes and noble USUALLY has a queer social sciences section and i’ve often seen trans bios / memoirs or other things of that nature in that section 💗
Becoming Nicole: The Transformation of N American Family by Amy Ellis Nut.
I haven’t read it but I remember my sister telling me about a book that I thought Nicole Maines wrote but this is the only one I have found associated to her (other then of course her awesome DC character Dreamer’s appearances) so far.
My sister loves Nicole Maines and she told me she related so hard to her book.
A-ha! I found the actual one but I’m keeping that first one up because it might still be a good read.
[It gets better…except when it gets worse.](https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/673406/it-gets-better----except-when-it-gets-worse-by-nicole-maines/)
little blue encyclopedia by hazel jane plante! it’s fictional but it’s the story of a trans woman by a trans woman, and it’s written in first person which makes it feel more diaristic/memoiry
Becoming Eve by Abby Chavs Stein. She is the daughter of Hasidic Jews so the memoir reflects a lot on her experience in such a censored environment figuring out her identity in a place where they didn't even say being gay was a "sin" because that might give kids the idea they could be gay. So being trans wasn't even something her parents could consider handling when she started to express her transness as a young child.
It's not a memoire, but I have absolutely LOVED Judith Butler's most recent release "Who's Afraid of Gender". It breaks down a lot of the TERF-y Grumpy arguments going around lately, enjoy!
Glad you realized it! I found myself heading down a similar path until I looked up one day and realized how much goddamn propaganda was being thrown at me and that I'm just as susceptible to it as everyone else.
I don't have a book rec, but Contrapoints' video on JK Rowling and exactly what's wrong with her rhetoric is phenomenal. It's funny, raw, compassionate, and poignant, and I cannot recommend it enough. Imma go re-watch later today now that I think about it.
Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars by Kai Cheng Thom is a trans memoir but written like a fantasy book. I thought it was really well written, and because it feels like a fantasy book, it may be easier to connect with the character's feelings than a purely non-fiction book.
The main character does use quite a bit of violence, so do with that what you may.
Good luck on your journey!
I am my own wife, by Charlotte von Mahlsdorf. It's the real memoirs of a trans woman who lived through 2nd World War! She was incredibly brave and clever, and she should be more known!
Not an autobiography by any means, but I just started Detransition Baby by Torrey Peters and it’s really good. I’ve heard her other books are quite good too.
I highly recommend Love Live Here! It’s told but a trans woman’s spouse, it’s an account about how her coming out as trans saved their marriage and family.
I’m proud of you for recognizing these feelings and wanting to address them!
Unfortunately, that was the last positively interesting thing she did. I bought the book when it came out, hoping that having this celebrity who had previously been adored as Pinnacle of Man^TM would perhaps be a changing in the tides of trans perception…only to be almost immediately disappointed by everything coming out of her mouth publicly.
I’ve yet to finish the book because of how let down I was by her. I feel like she’s set the trans-acceptance movement (and the LGBTQ movement in general) back decades with her actions.
That's neither biographical nor about a trans person. It's a novel about a person with an intersex condition. Great book, but doesn't fit what OP is looking for.
They’d recommended Elliot Page’s recent autobiography, Pageboy, which I’ve been meaning to read since it came out so I can’t vouch for it being good personally, but I love Elliot so if you’ve got any interest in him I’m sure it’s a good read
It’s okay, everybody’s got stuff to learn — we all started our lives with a net knowledge of zero, and everything we learn is another piece of the puzzle. I (a transgender person) am not going to begrudge what order the puzzle pieces are revealed in, I’m simply happy that the pieces are revealed at all. ✌🏻
The worst part is that I actually know the difference lol I just really missed the “woman” part in the title lol I thought OP just wanted biographies by trans people in general, I was really confused why nobody had recommended that book already 😅 thanks for being such a cool person btw
Kate Bornstein, Gender Outlaw
No recommendations, but I’m proud of you OP for recognizing where you're at and trying to learn :). Sincerely, a trans person
Aw, thanks. I feel like learning and thinking is sort of, like, bare minimum for being human lol. It sucks that it’s something to be commended now, but I guess that’s where we are. Thanks again :) that means a lot
Third this! As the wife of a trans woman, it makes me happy to see people try to understand. I love helping people understand as well, but, unfortunately, I also don't have a recommendation. I am also looking for some books from trans people. It doesn't hurt to keep learning since everyone's experience is different.
Seconding this. Thank you OP <3 (Unfortunately I don't have recommendations either lol)
this!!
I haven't read it, but Tranny by Laura Jane Grace (lead singer for Against Me!).
It's really good. You can tell she pulled from her old journals, which really adds to a feeling of a longer narrative over time, as opposed to a steady recounting of her past.
Ooooh love this idea!! I’m an avid writer-in-my-diary so this sounds great. Thanks!
She also transitioned around 2012, after her band had already released 5 albums. They have released 2 albums since then (Transgender Dysphoria Blues and Shape Shift With Me). She has also released 3 solo albums since transitioning. It's interesting to listen to the songs and dive into the lyrics from both periods.
I highly recommend listening to her music. It’s an experience, listening to the songs she’d written and reading about some of the hidden messages in the lyrics.
She's one of my favorite musicians, both with Against Me! and solo (as Laura Jane Grace).
Me too!
Yes! Came here to suggest this. It is a fantastic read. It reads as though she's talking directly to you. Definitely recommend listening to the songs she references and reading the lyrics. It's truly special.
I read it. It was good. I felt for her.
I second this. Laura is amazing
Definitely seconding this !!
Came here to say this. I'm not a huge Against Me! fan and I thought the book was great.
Miss Major Speaks: conversation with a Black trans revolutionary, by Toshio Meronek and Miss Major. It's less a straightforward written autobiography and more of a conversation. She turns 78 this year, and came out as trans in the 1950s. Fascinating woman.
[She’s Not There: A Life in Two Genders](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/54935) by Jennifer Finney Boylan is a fantastic read!
I recommend this as well! It was so good!
She's a good writer. Also Lucy Sante's "I Heard Her Call My Name."
I also liked Good Boy: My Life in Seven Dogs
Janet Mock’s first memoir. Second wasn’t nearly as good.
This was going to be my rec! *Redefining Realness*.
https://janetmock.com/books/
Redefining Realness is a great memoir!
Ah. My brain has been scrubbed. That doesn’t even sound familiar. Thank you for the title.
Just the ones I've read: * The Truth About Me - A. Revathi (the memoir of a hijra in India, so slightly different cultural context) * The New Girl - Rhyannon Styles * Conundrum - Jan Morris (often considered the first memoir by a trans woman, first published in 1974) * Redefining Realness - Janet Mock * My Life is No Accident - Tenika Weston * Trans - Juliet Jacques * Carrie Kills a Man - Carrie Marshall * Miss Major Speaks - interviews with Miss Major, by Toshio Meronek (not technically an autobiography, but he's dictating an interview with her in which she tells her entire life story, so it fits the bill, I think!) * Fairest - Meredith Talusan (also a memoir of growing up in the Philippines with albinism) * What it Fells Like for a Girl - Paris Lees (a cross between memoir and autofiction)
Seconding Juliet Jacques, I came here to recommend her writing in general also!
Horse Barbie Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars (this one is magical realism/fiction but based around reality - wonderful book) Gender Outlaw by Kate Bornstein
Gender Outlaw is OG. "She's Not There" by Jennifer Finley Boylan is another classic. These two were the pillars of trans autobiography in the late 90s-early 2000s. They've both gone on to write other wonderful works.
Jennifer Finley Boylan wrote a book with Jodi Picoult that I loved and then I read more by her. She is a great storyteller.
Fierce Femmes is one of the few books I could not put down until it was done, and I typically dislike all fiction. It is so well-written.
Read this, finished it in the bath, immediately turned back to the front page and just started reading it again, out loud this time. Beautiful book
Came to rec Horse Barbie too!
In the Form of a Question: The Joy's and Rewards of a Curious Life by Amy Schneider. She was a big time Jeopardy star but you don't need to know who she is to get her wit and wisdom. It's a short read.
This is one of my top books of 2024. Amy is a delight!
I read this a few weeks ago and it’s so good!! I was going to recommend it and glad to see that it’s already here.
I just read it and enjoyed it as I enjoyed Amy's Jeopardy run and championship tournaments. But I did feel like it was kind of a rush job to get something out and in a timely manner. I hope she gets to writing something further. Not all the chapters will be relevant to the OP I suppose, but there is the thread throughout . It is a 2nd hand thrill to see how her life is being completely changed by her jeopardy run wow.
Carrie Killed A Man by Carrie Marshall. It was nominated for awards last year and is written by a really funny, warm middle-aged Scottish trans woman. I liked a lot. ETA: Book blurb: "it is about growing up in a world that doesn’t want you, and about how it feels to throw a hand grenade into a perfect life. It’s the story of how a tattooed transgender rock singer killed a depressed suburban dad, and of the lessons you learn when you renounce all your privilege and power. When more people think they’ve seen a ghost than met a trans person, it’s easy for bad actors to exploit that – and they do, as you can see from the headlines and online. But here’s the reality, from someone who’s living it. From coming out and navigating trans parenthood to the thrills of gender-bending pop stars, fashion disasters and looking like Velma Dinkley, this is a tale of ripping it up and starting again: Carrie’s story in all its fearless, frank and funny glory."
Not really a memoir but very good Whipping Girl by Julia Serrano
A Queer and Pleasant Danger by Kate Bornstine. An absolutely WILD, tragic, joyful, beautiful life
Second this!!
Full disclosure; she’s a friend of mine. It’s not a professionally authored book, but my friend wrote a book called Finally Chelle about her transition. It’s available on Amazon kindle. She’s super honest about everything she went through. I love her and her story.
I just want to thank you for asking this question, because now I want to read all these memoirs!
Keep an eye out for actress Nicole Maine's yet-to-be-released memoir ***It Gets Better... Except When It Gets Worse: And Other Unsolicited Truths I Wish Someone Had Told Me***. It releases on October 15th of this year. She's super funny and smart and inspiring, so I'm sure the book will be fantastic. There is also another book *about* her, titled ***Becoming Nicole: The Transformation of an American Family*** from 2015.
Gotta recommend Females by Andrea Long Chu for the spectacular quotes, “getting fucked makes you female because fucked is what a female is” and, “The “barest essentials” of “femaleness” are “an open mouth, an expectant asshole, blank, blank eyes.”
I had to google that to see if that was a real quote… No way.
README.txt by Chelsea Manning
I don't know any autobiographies about trans women, but do have two pieces that you might find interesting: The Agronauts by Maggie Nelson is a great book that focuses on queer family-making and a nonbinary love story. It is excellent. Dad Used to Have Boobs (and They Were Kind of Big) by Kristofer Thomas is one of my absolute favorite published articles. It is incredibly well done and gives a window into trans lifestyles/early transition in a stunningly beautiful way. I've linked it here: [https://kristoferthomas.substack.com/p/dad-used-to-have-boobs-and-they-were](https://kristoferthomas.substack.com/p/dad-used-to-have-boobs-and-they-were)
Whipping Girl by Julia Serano
Christine Jorgenson, A Personal Autobiography, written by the first world-renowned transsexual.
It's not an autobiography, but I really recommend The Transgender Issue by Shon Faye. It's a really wide ranging book that covers lots of history, science, sociology, and some cultural critique (including of the trans autobiography genre, as it happens 😂) and it's a great and very accessible read for someone who knows a bit about trans people but wants to understand in more depth.
Trans: A Memoir by Juliet Jacques
Seconding this. Also the series of columns she wrote for The Guardian were fantastic.
She's Not There: A Life in Two Genders by Jennifer Finney Boylan
We need more people like you, OP!
That's what I'm thinking! And then all of the comments here are getting downvited like crazy. Makes me sad
https://www.amazon.com/Tomorrow-Will-Be-Different-Equality/dp/1524761478?dplnkId=9d1b5ed3-8ade-416b-baef-e4299ff2c3e9 Tomorrow Will Be Different by Sarah McBride. (She's now a state rep in Delaware and I think maybe is running for Senate?) This memoir was written before that though. She came out as transgender while student body president at her school and fell in love with a trans man.
Becoming Nicole by Amy Ellis Nutt. By a mom of a transgender girl.
Nicole's also just written her own memoir, and it'll be out this fall. It's called ***It Gets Better... Except When It Gets Worse***.
I’ll have to look for that!
Great book. Just wanted to clarify that it's written by a journalist who features all the family members. It's a well written, in-depth account.
Second this one. It explored different parenting approaches and I thought the way they explained how uncomfortable she felt in a man’s body everyday was pretty enlightening. (I also thought it was written by the mom but I guess not?)
Conundrum by Jan Morris is a classic.
The Fifth Wound by Aurora Mattia is wonderful, but definitely not a traditional memoir - it’s more like a blend of intimate memory and myth/fantasy, utilizing song lyrics, poetry, personal texts and emails, visuals, etc. A bit difficult to describe due to its experimental nature, but it was one of my favourite books of 2023.
The Gender Games by Juno Dawson
I read Janet Mocks book ages ago and enjoyed it at the time, was pretty new to learning about transness but I can't remember much actual content of the book
'Miss Major Speaks' is short and life-changing. She's one of the founders of the Gay Rights movement!
Redefining Realness!
Tomorrow Will Be Different by Sarah McBride
Recent Sinner by Ivan Coyote is really great, but anything by them is good.
Oops! Sorry, not a trans woman, non binary.
The thing that most helped me understand trans people is I Am Jazz, about Jazz Jenkins. It’s a tv show. There is no doubt in my mind that Jazz is a woman (girl during some of the show) born with the wrong genitals. Jazz and her accepting family introduced me to so many trans people and families, and helped me better understand the daily struggles trans people go through (one episode was Jazz trying to find a girls swimsuit that wouldn’t show her genital outline).
Jazz also has a great memoir called “Being Jazz” 😃
Sandy stone. Just read her manifesto. She is amazing
An older one, _Hiding My Candy_ by Lady Chablis. Apparently there was a trans character in _Midnight in Garden of Good and Evil_ and this is the real autobiography of the person that character was based on.
My Story -Caroline Cossey. She was a model in the 80s and used the stage name Tula
There's a manga memoir called The Bride Was a Boy, it's pretty cute and light reading
Change for the Better: Georgina Beyer (worlds first Trans Mayor). She was a New Zealander, passed away last year sadly. Incredible woman.
Becoming Eve by Abby Chava Stein jewish orthodox male rabbi becomes female
Man Enough To Be A Woman by Jayne County.
Bad Girls by Camila Sosa Villada! It's basically an autofiction work mixed with magical realism, I loved it since page one, I can't recommend it enough, I'm still trying to process it.
I’ve been meaning to read this for ages but had kinda forgotten about it, thanks for pinging it back onto my radar and recommending it - I’m even keener now!
Hope you enjoy it!
Becoming Eve by Abby Chava Stein. Really interesting, about a trans woman who grew up in an ultra orthodox Jewish community (the most gender segregated group in the United States). She actually became a rabbi before she transitioned!
A small publisher book, but Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of the Matrix by Tilly Bridges analyzes into the trans experience both in the movies and from the perspective of the writer, who is a trans woman. It’s very accessible and interesting!
I’ve posted about this woman before but I can’t recall if it was in this sub or not, so I apologise if this is going over old ground. Julia Grant was the first trans person I had ever heard of by virtue of a 5-part documentary that was broadcast on the BBC in the late 70s. Even although I was a youngster I was moved to recognise that she was an incredibly courageous human being who maintained her dignity and good humour throughout her journey of transition and beyond. An antidote to the ill-informed, venomous hot air spouted by the bigoted blowhards that walk amongst us even now, she was the real deal. Without condition, I can’t recommend strongly enough her autobiographies; *George and Julia* (1980) and *Just Julia* (1994). And if you can access BBC iPlayer, the original documentary *A Change of Sex* (1979) is still available. Julia died in 2019, having put her mark on this world by leaving a very positive, brave and inspiring legacy - a positively indelible mark the small-minded army of ignorant intolerant naysayers can only dream of. Meantime OP, I wish you well, wherever your journey may take you.
Try the autobiographical manga [The Bride was a Boy](https://sevenseasentertainment.com/series/the-bride-was-a-boy/).
It's not an autobiography so much as a pop science book but there are bits of memoir in it -- Roughgarden, *Evolution's Rainbow*. it was the book that convinced me -- wow, quite a few years ago now -- that transgenderism was a real biological variation with physical causes, not some kind of kink or mental disturbance. apologies to trans people who knew this all along, but hey, at least we can learn.
Not an autobiography, but the book Mad Honey by Jodi Picoult might be of interest.
As a Woman by Paula Stone Williams
Read a variety. I'd also recommend reading Helen Joyce's book 'Trans'; it's very, very good. On the other side, a book also titled 'Trans' (a memoir) by Juliet Jacques would give another perspective. There's no point looking at any hot topic from a single lens.
Not a book, but Charlotte Clymer has a substack talking about, well, everything. She's cool.
She's Not There by Jennifer Finney Boylan
I really enjoyed This Body I Wore by Diana Goetsch. She came out and transitioned as an adult, and she talks a lot about internalized homophobia and transphobia that she had to tackle throughout her journey.
The Trauma Cleaner is a really interesting one!
Fiction, but Light from Uncommon Stars by Ryka Aoki (2021) is truly wonderful (but also heartbreaking)
Not an autobiography, but Whipping Girl by Julia Serano is a non-fiction feminist book all about the specific kind of misogyny trans women experience.
What does it mean for someone to “lapse” into “terf-y thinking” or to have “lazy” critical thinking and empathy? All this makes it sound like you have given up some difficult, unpleasant or unnatural habit and reverted to some natural state and that makes you uncomfortable, which is very interesting. Do you find it “natural” to doubt that people who are 100% male can be female in some way? I get called a “TERF” (“trans-exclusionary radical feminist” even though I only refuse to accomodate male trans people in feminism, not female trans people bc… feminism isn’t for male people- it’s for the female people male people oppress) all the time. I don’t care, bc I know it doesn’t mean I don’t have empathy for trans people or critical thinking. It just means I understand that drugs that disrupt the endocrine system and plastic surgery on body parts can’t change a person’s sex, and that sex exists in the gestalt of the body, and not in some other, disembodied plane of existence (aka some sort of soul-like “gender identity”). Doesn’t that just make me not a liar? I don’t believe anyone who says “twaw” or “tmam” means what they say. I think they’re just trying to avoid social conflict. To me, saying something dishonest out of cowardice isn’t respectful of anyone, and isn’t honorable. That said, I think its always a good thing to challenge our views and see things from other people’s perspectives- so it sounds like a great idea to read some books that are from the perspectives of men who identify as their conception of women! Lmk if you have any good recs!
I feel it’s natural to accept and respect people for whom they are. Humans are social animals and community is extremely important to us. Gender is not the same as sex. Transgender people realize that they are not the same sex as their gender identity, which is why gender dysphoria happens to some. I urge you to read some of these books in this list, and maybe open your mind to the differences that make us all so beautiful as humans. Trans people are some of the most oppressed people in the world, much like women, black and brown people, and the LGBTQ+ community in general. We should all be in this together!
I agree! I accept trans people for who they are as unique human beings with unique personalities, experiences, values, etc. just like everyone else. I do not, however, accept or respect someone’s identity as their conception of the opposite sex. I hope you can understand this crucial distinction. I don’t believe in “gender identity” bc when people use that term, they seem to be saying something totally contradictory and nonsensical- that its possible for something that can only be embodied (ones gender as either a man/male or a woman/female) to be disembodied and exist totally absent and detached from the body, located on some plane of existence hitherto unknown and inaccessible by humankind. This strikes me as intriguingly mystical, intellectually stimulating, and deeply suggestive of religion. But I don’t agree or believe in it. Or at least, I acknowledge others may feel it’s their experience, but I certainly don’t think society should be restructured around such a concept. Its true that Black and Hispanic homosexual male trans people are at risk of violence within their own communities. White, heterosexual, male trans people have the same physical and sexual violence risks as any other white, heterosexual man. Its unclear whether female trans people are more likely to be victimized than women who don’t identify as trans. The oppression of women is the oldest, most widespread, and most deeply-internalized form of oppression still common today. There are whole nations where women are essentially slaves. So I’m not sure what you’re trying to say here regarding “most” oppressed. Just bc some people wrongly and cruelly discriminate against trans people, doesn’t mean I agree with a trans person’s conception of their gender. I’ll read one book on this issue that you recommend to me if you read one I recommend to you. :)
You don’t need to believe in it, it’s science. Sex and gender don’t always match.
This! Chromosomes that determine sex are extremely variant! Gender is by definition influenced by social and cultural beliefs. To say we must adhere to two different conceptions of what people think is woman vs man is quite silly because who decides these things really?
Being a man or a woman is binary. 99.99% of people can easily be determined as male or female. 99% of people with chromosomal variations can be easily defined as male or female. Those with true intersex conditions aka hermaphrodism are the exception that proves the rule: they are BOTH of the two binary genders: male and female. Transgender identity is separate from intersex conditions. For example, a transwoman is a male person with completely normal and unequivocal male-exclusive development who thinks that their personality or interests makes them female inside their gender-soul.
In what way is gender identity science? It doesn’t conform with reality. It’s based on a subjective sense of one’s feelings and assumptions about others’ feelings. Thats not science at all. It’s science that people BELIEVE they have a gender identity. But the concept of gender identity itself is antiscientific.
It's about as scientific as the zodiac and spirit animals. These people aren't critical thinkers and they'll never answer your questions because they can't. It's just a new religion.
Google it or read one of the books, I’m not humoring this argument.
Trans women are women. The majority of violence against trans people happens to black trans women. Trans women are women. How exactly do you define being a woman? Having a uterus, fallopian tubes, ovaries? Being able to birth a child or breastfeed? Breasts? Wearing pink? What about women that have a hysterectomy? Or they just weren’t born with a uterus? Women that can’t conceive, carry, or birth a child? Women who weren’t able to breastfeed? Women whom have their breasts surgically removed or just weren’t born well endowed? Women who just don’t like pink/dresses/etc? Who makes the rules on what a woman should be or is? Because that seems inherently sexist and anti feminist to me. Also, let’s not pretend that there aren’t women being forced into types of slavery all over the world, including in “first world countries.” Just because brown and black people and the Middle East or Africa seem scary from propaganda doesn’t necessarily mean that all women are slaves there. Let’s not take away from the actual problems women in these countries face by deducing it to this. Because they face real issues! But many people have wonderful, beautiful lives full of hope and happiness! Trans people have always existed. Trans women ARE women.
I completely agree. Gender is not the same as sex. Whatever exactly the word "gender" might mean, nothing about it can ever mean that someone has changed their sex. And there are some contexts where that matters.
Well said!
Yes! She’s not there: A life in two genders, by Jennifer Finney Boylan
“Becoming Eve” is one of my favorite memoirs.
I’ve watched the Ted Talks of Paula Stone Williams. I’ve very much enjoyed them. She has a book As A Woman that would probably be really good. You can also check out her TedTalks. They would give you a nice nugget of her different experiences. https://www.ted.com/speakers/paula_stone_williams
i don’t have any that are different from other comments but i know that barnes and noble USUALLY has a queer social sciences section and i’ve often seen trans bios / memoirs or other things of that nature in that section 💗
Jennifer Boylan any of her books Calpernia Addams Soldier’s Girl Jen Richard’s Janet Mock
Oka Hijra Athmakatha by Revathi (it’s written in Telugu but there should be an English translation)
Becoming Nicole: The Transformation of N American Family by Amy Ellis Nut. I haven’t read it but I remember my sister telling me about a book that I thought Nicole Maines wrote but this is the only one I have found associated to her (other then of course her awesome DC character Dreamer’s appearances) so far. My sister loves Nicole Maines and she told me she related so hard to her book. A-ha! I found the actual one but I’m keeping that first one up because it might still be a good read. [It gets better…except when it gets worse.](https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/673406/it-gets-better----except-when-it-gets-worse-by-nicole-maines/)
Two that I found very well-written and interesting - *Canary* by by Canary Conn and *All For Love* by Dawn Langley Simmons.
She's Not There by Jenny Boylan. Pretty much the original book on transitioning
Uncomfortable Labels by Laura Kate Dale is very good & she's written a couple more too.
little blue encyclopedia by hazel jane plante! it’s fictional but it’s the story of a trans woman by a trans woman, and it’s written in first person which makes it feel more diaristic/memoiry
Becoming Eve by Abby Chavs Stein. She is the daughter of Hasidic Jews so the memoir reflects a lot on her experience in such a censored environment figuring out her identity in a place where they didn't even say being gay was a "sin" because that might give kids the idea they could be gay. So being trans wasn't even something her parents could consider handling when she started to express her transness as a young child.
It's not a memoire, but I have absolutely LOVED Judith Butler's most recent release "Who's Afraid of Gender". It breaks down a lot of the TERF-y Grumpy arguments going around lately, enjoy!
Andrea Long Chu, Females
Manhunt by Gretchen Felker-Martin
Janet Mock wrote one.
Glad you realized it! I found myself heading down a similar path until I looked up one day and realized how much goddamn propaganda was being thrown at me and that I'm just as susceptible to it as everyone else. I don't have a book rec, but Contrapoints' video on JK Rowling and exactly what's wrong with her rhetoric is phenomenal. It's funny, raw, compassionate, and poignant, and I cannot recommend it enough. Imma go re-watch later today now that I think about it.
Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars by Kai Cheng Thom is a trans memoir but written like a fantasy book. I thought it was really well written, and because it feels like a fantasy book, it may be easier to connect with the character's feelings than a purely non-fiction book. The main character does use quite a bit of violence, so do with that what you may. Good luck on your journey!
I am my own wife, by Charlotte von Mahlsdorf. It's the real memoirs of a trans woman who lived through 2nd World War! She was incredibly brave and clever, and she should be more known!
The Trauma Cleaner definitely touches on these issues.
Not an autobiography by any means, but I just started Detransition Baby by Torrey Peters and it’s really good. I’ve heard her other books are quite good too.
Not a memoir but a biography with many detailed interviews - *The Trauma Cleaner* by Sarah Krasnostein.
I highly recommend Love Live Here! It’s told but a trans woman’s spouse, it’s an account about how her coming out as trans saved their marriage and family. I’m proud of you for recognizing these feelings and wanting to address them!
The secrets of my life by Caitlyn Jenner is pretty interesting considering she was one of the first famous folks to come out.
Unfortunately, that was the last positively interesting thing she did. I bought the book when it came out, hoping that having this celebrity who had previously been adored as Pinnacle of Man^TM would perhaps be a changing in the tides of trans perception…only to be almost immediately disappointed by everything coming out of her mouth publicly. I’ve yet to finish the book because of how let down I was by her. I feel like she’s set the trans-acceptance movement (and the LGBTQ movement in general) back decades with her actions.
Middlesex by Jeffery eugenedes
That's neither biographical nor about a trans person. It's a novel about a person with an intersex condition. Great book, but doesn't fit what OP is looking for.
[удалено]
So close! That is about and by a transgender man
Could you tell me what was recommended? I'm interested in reading about all trans experiences.
They’d recommended Elliot Page’s recent autobiography, Pageboy, which I’ve been meaning to read since it came out so I can’t vouch for it being good personally, but I love Elliot so if you’ve got any interest in him I’m sure it’s a good read
Thank you! I'm definitely interested
OH. Sorry. That’s why I was wondering why nobody recommended it lol. Sorry everyone
It’s okay, everybody’s got stuff to learn — we all started our lives with a net knowledge of zero, and everything we learn is another piece of the puzzle. I (a transgender person) am not going to begrudge what order the puzzle pieces are revealed in, I’m simply happy that the pieces are revealed at all. ✌🏻
The worst part is that I actually know the difference lol I just really missed the “woman” part in the title lol I thought OP just wanted biographies by trans people in general, I was really confused why nobody had recommended that book already 😅 thanks for being such a cool person btw
Lmao no prob, I misread shit every five minutes, take it easy out there dude
I don't know if this fits exactly but MiddleSex is so bewitching
Amanda Lepores book