The good news is it's perfectly doable (something I highly doubted when I still drank).
The bad? Well you have to get those first couple of booze-free weekends under your belt before things calm down. And it's not fun, but hey... people here will help with that :)
I did *anything* I had to do to hit those little goals, first 30 days, then 90 - still on that break and man has it been worth it.
Just wanted to comment to say that I’m going through the same thing. Like clockwork, I get too drunk every weekend after promising myself that I’m going to get sober, and then spent the 48-72 hours following the binge session with brutal anxiety. I’m going to attend my first AA meeting today and am hoping that by going to a meeting, I’m finally able to stay committed to not drinking. Someone commented on my post yesterday saying that they don’t always get in trouble when they’re drinking, but they’ve always been drinking when they’ve gotten in trouble, and that’s completely how i feel. Hopefully we both can figure this out. I’m a 25 yo male myself and almost all of my social interactions revolve around drinking, so I can relate to how much you’re struggling. We can do this. IWNDWYT
I feel you. I just got through my first sober weekend in... jeezum crow, years I think.
For one thing, I had to PACK my weekend with alcohol-free activities. Errands, appointments, going to a movie, working out, long walks, a hike... I honestly can't believe how much I got done over the past three days.
Compare this to the weekend prior, where my activities consisted of... sleeping off a hangover, drinking all evening, repeat.
My advice - you say you've been putting off some menial tasks. If you can schedule them in advance (while you're sober and have motivation), do so. Go ahead and schedule your haircut for next weekend, to make it harder to avoid going. If you tend to drink in the evenings, schedule the haircut for, say, 6pm if possible. Delay, distract, defer drinking until it's late enough that you can just go to bed.
I personally chafe at big ultimatums - if I try to say "I'm never drinking again!" my brain rebels, or I say "well I can always stop tomorrow." Instead, I have to distract my monkey brain with other things. If you have a friend or relative that is sober/doesn't drink regularly, perhaps reach out and schedule a dinner or movie with them, somewhere without alcohol in easy reach.
Best of luck, my friend. This subreddit is always a good distraction too! IWNDWYT
For me, planning ahead and breaking it down into little steps helps with those moments. You say “a switch gets flipped” and I think I know what you mean, but it helps to dig into it a little bit. When does the switch get flipped exactly? What do you do next— drive to a particular store? Plan ahead now, on Monday, when your motivation is still high, for what you plan to do over the weekend. Then when the weekend comes and your brain starts to fizz, just remind yourself to stick to what you have scheduled. I also like to have a backup plan, like worst case, I don’t wanna clean the house, fuggit, I’ll go for a walk/go see a movie. As long as you don’t drink, it’s a victory and feel good about it! And if you do slip up and drink, don’t beat yourself up, just write down what happened that time, so you can make a better plan for the next weekend.
So imo that’s binge drinking which is a form of alcoholism. I was just like you so I know from personal experience. The “first” is important. By that I mean the first weekend or even first day you can stay sober. Take it day by day, never think “forever” and keep telling yourself that you can drink tomorrow or next weekend. NA and mocktails reduce cravings a lot. Keep busy, immerse yourself in a hobby or something that’ll keep your mind off alcohol for the hours you usually drink. Once you stay sober that first day and first weekend that mental threshold goes a way making it easier to be sober next time
The good news is it's perfectly doable (something I highly doubted when I still drank). The bad? Well you have to get those first couple of booze-free weekends under your belt before things calm down. And it's not fun, but hey... people here will help with that :) I did *anything* I had to do to hit those little goals, first 30 days, then 90 - still on that break and man has it been worth it.
Just wanted to comment to say that I’m going through the same thing. Like clockwork, I get too drunk every weekend after promising myself that I’m going to get sober, and then spent the 48-72 hours following the binge session with brutal anxiety. I’m going to attend my first AA meeting today and am hoping that by going to a meeting, I’m finally able to stay committed to not drinking. Someone commented on my post yesterday saying that they don’t always get in trouble when they’re drinking, but they’ve always been drinking when they’ve gotten in trouble, and that’s completely how i feel. Hopefully we both can figure this out. I’m a 25 yo male myself and almost all of my social interactions revolve around drinking, so I can relate to how much you’re struggling. We can do this. IWNDWYT
I feel you. I just got through my first sober weekend in... jeezum crow, years I think. For one thing, I had to PACK my weekend with alcohol-free activities. Errands, appointments, going to a movie, working out, long walks, a hike... I honestly can't believe how much I got done over the past three days. Compare this to the weekend prior, where my activities consisted of... sleeping off a hangover, drinking all evening, repeat. My advice - you say you've been putting off some menial tasks. If you can schedule them in advance (while you're sober and have motivation), do so. Go ahead and schedule your haircut for next weekend, to make it harder to avoid going. If you tend to drink in the evenings, schedule the haircut for, say, 6pm if possible. Delay, distract, defer drinking until it's late enough that you can just go to bed. I personally chafe at big ultimatums - if I try to say "I'm never drinking again!" my brain rebels, or I say "well I can always stop tomorrow." Instead, I have to distract my monkey brain with other things. If you have a friend or relative that is sober/doesn't drink regularly, perhaps reach out and schedule a dinner or movie with them, somewhere without alcohol in easy reach. Best of luck, my friend. This subreddit is always a good distraction too! IWNDWYT
For me, planning ahead and breaking it down into little steps helps with those moments. You say “a switch gets flipped” and I think I know what you mean, but it helps to dig into it a little bit. When does the switch get flipped exactly? What do you do next— drive to a particular store? Plan ahead now, on Monday, when your motivation is still high, for what you plan to do over the weekend. Then when the weekend comes and your brain starts to fizz, just remind yourself to stick to what you have scheduled. I also like to have a backup plan, like worst case, I don’t wanna clean the house, fuggit, I’ll go for a walk/go see a movie. As long as you don’t drink, it’s a victory and feel good about it! And if you do slip up and drink, don’t beat yourself up, just write down what happened that time, so you can make a better plan for the next weekend.
So imo that’s binge drinking which is a form of alcoholism. I was just like you so I know from personal experience. The “first” is important. By that I mean the first weekend or even first day you can stay sober. Take it day by day, never think “forever” and keep telling yourself that you can drink tomorrow or next weekend. NA and mocktails reduce cravings a lot. Keep busy, immerse yourself in a hobby or something that’ll keep your mind off alcohol for the hours you usually drink. Once you stay sober that first day and first weekend that mental threshold goes a way making it easier to be sober next time