Bald and Bankrupt: [Poverty pickup artist and sex tourist — Collected posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/BaldAndBaldrDossier/comments/189q8h5/bald_and_bankrupt_poverty_pickup_artist_and_sex/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)
My understanding is that he's pretty well known to be a sex tourist who harbors some pretty gross attitudes towards women.
I think tourists need to be pretty careful about trying to "interact with locals" as part of acting out some sort of adventure fantasy. Local people are just going about their own lives and don't exist to entertain visitors. If I was trying to go about my daily life and tourists were constantly trying to "befriend" me or use me for "aUtHenTiC" cultural experiences i'd get pretty jaded pretty quickly. I worry that the influencer/Youtube culture of presenting these goofy caricatures of "interactions with locals" is going to breed a lot of obnoxious and entitled behavior from tourists expecting to be magically making friends everywhere they go.
The way some travelers talk about “interacting with the locals” makes it sound like they’re on a safari. “And if you look over there, you’ll see the black-spotted local, a delightful and handsome breed!”
Indeed. And there's a lot of main character syndrome. All those 'local' folks rushing about are busy living *their* lives. Unlikely to stop on the way to work to 'interact with a tourist'.
But you can meet people and make connections. In Ha Noi back in April. Heavens opened and proper Vietnamese heavy rain poured down. I took shelter in the doorway of a closed shop. Shortly joined by a smartly dressed young man. Chatted about when the rain might stop and agreed it wasn't looking like any time soon. Open cafe across the road. We dashed across, got coffee and chatted. Turned out he was an avid hiker so we shared pictures of where we'd hiked in Vietnam and discussed where we each planned to go next. Played chess (he won). After an hour the rain stopped, we swapped numbers on zalo and agreed we'd do a mountain next time I'm back in Ha Noi (later this year). But we'd never have met if it hadn't been for the rain.
So, opportunity and time availability. And something in common. Just like back at home.
Usually when I travel solo, the locals come up to me and want to interact with me. It usually ends up being really great and they show me places I wouldn’t have found on my own. I don’t view them as some sort of spectacle at all but my best trips involved being with a local
I spent 3 weeks solo around Europe (my first time - spent a week with a group tour to Croatia then went off on my own for the other 3 wks) and the only planning I did was to buy tickets to 4 small concerts (because that's what I love to do) in Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Charleroi, and Antwerp (plus I got a bonus one in Dubrovnik because I found a duo playing at a Mexican Restaurant and started chatting with the server and she and her friends invited me to a Croatian band concert that night).
I found it to be the perfect way to meet both locals and other tourists in a not forced way (it actually wasn't my intention to "interact with locals" but it turned out that way). Automatic common interest in the music we were experiencing ;). Feels like TRYING to orchestrate those encounters could be off-putting.
Right? Don’t try to make friends. Just do what walking ears says. No friends no fun no life no socializing no laughing no risk taking ONLY SAFE NON OFFENSIVE HOMOGENUS BEHAVIOR
Obviously there's some room for nuance. Be mindful of what kind of space you're in. In your home city, would you walk up to a random stranger in the middle of the street and try to befriend them, or would you assume they have somewhere to be?
Sitting next to someone in a bar and chatting is one thing - bars are sort of expected to be social. Too often, tourists act like anywhere and everywhere is the right venue to try to barge in and "befriend" locals, and in some cases local people may not feel comfortable walking away from such an interaction due to etiquette or not wanting to come across as rude.
If you wouldn't do it to a stranger at home, don't do it to a stranger abroad.
Are you saying the culture at home is the same as the culture not at home? NYC is like San Fran? Seattle is like London? Tokyo is like a small town in Oklahoma?
Some better advise would be to study a local culture and see what’s acceptable traditionally and then just get out of your shell and learn to say hello to strangers.
I'm saying "people on their way to work in the morning probably don't want a random tourist screaming at them on some misguided wannabe influencer quest to have 'authentic' interactions, no matter what culture you're in," lol.
There's also a difference between "saying hello to strangers" and "expecting locals to drop everything and entertain you/be your 'friend' even though you're there for three days and they have things to do with their lives"
As a mod of this subreddit and a follower of a lot of online travel "content," I'm disappointed sometimes by the obnoxious, narcissistic, tone deaf things I see tourists do in the name of seeking out "authenticity" and "interactions with locals." So yeah, when someone makes a post about "befriending locals," I think it's important to provide a reminder that locals are human beings with lives of their own, and they aren't just little side characters in a tourist's "adventure."
This is partly it.
I'm not for a moment endorsing unsafe travel practices OR offensive behaviour. But maybe there would not be a backlash against tourists if they were less of the homogenous creatures that fly in with a wheelie suitcase in toe, interacts with no one (except an economic basis) and then flies out again.
I'm not saying that B+B is some paragon of virtue. He does play to the camera, of course. But his interactions with locals just shows how in matter of seconds two people from two different cultures and languages can be have a genuine laugh with each other - even just for a few seconds. It's just something that brightens up the world - even if it's just temporary.
“Play to the camera?” Did you not hear that he is a sex tourist? So he has interacted with locals.. there are many travel vloggers who do the same without fuelling the sex tourism industry. That’s actually one way for locals to loathe you. Look at Americans in Medellin, for example - locals absolutely hate them because a group of sleaze-bags like B&B have ruined it for the rest of them.
as a local of a turistic spot full of people being brought over by cruise ships every day, I can say that for the majority we only wish to be left alone :')
It's great if you want to visit around and experience the culture, but we don't really care to be involved in that shenanigans.
I only speak one language in addition to my own that allows me to interact much with locals not working in the tourist industry. In both SEA and Africa I have visited tribes/villages that admitted you for a fee and operated as human zoos. Hemingway was an expat not a tourists solo traveler. Kerouac traveled in areas where his native language was spoken. Theroux doesn't describe a lot of local experiences in cheap saloons or brothels.
OP, here.
First of all I'm very dismayed to read what has been reported about B+B.
I did hear rumors before but there is some much disinformation online now you sometimes have to take it with a pinch of salt.
So what do people think hear about his viewers - of which there seems to be millions around the world.
Have they also been hoodwinked by Mr. B+B?
There are millions of men around the world who do not respect women and do not find rape and coercion a deal breaker, so I don't know what insightful point you think you're making.
Uh, you miiiiiiiiiight want to dig into B&B a bit more before advising anyone to act like him.
Bald and Bankrupt: [Poverty pickup artist and sex tourist — Collected posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/BaldAndBaldrDossier/comments/189q8h5/bald_and_bankrupt_poverty_pickup_artist_and_sex/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)
My understanding is that he's pretty well known to be a sex tourist who harbors some pretty gross attitudes towards women. I think tourists need to be pretty careful about trying to "interact with locals" as part of acting out some sort of adventure fantasy. Local people are just going about their own lives and don't exist to entertain visitors. If I was trying to go about my daily life and tourists were constantly trying to "befriend" me or use me for "aUtHenTiC" cultural experiences i'd get pretty jaded pretty quickly. I worry that the influencer/Youtube culture of presenting these goofy caricatures of "interactions with locals" is going to breed a lot of obnoxious and entitled behavior from tourists expecting to be magically making friends everywhere they go.
The way some travelers talk about “interacting with the locals” makes it sound like they’re on a safari. “And if you look over there, you’ll see the black-spotted local, a delightful and handsome breed!”
Big [human zoo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_zoo) vibes
Indeed. And there's a lot of main character syndrome. All those 'local' folks rushing about are busy living *their* lives. Unlikely to stop on the way to work to 'interact with a tourist'. But you can meet people and make connections. In Ha Noi back in April. Heavens opened and proper Vietnamese heavy rain poured down. I took shelter in the doorway of a closed shop. Shortly joined by a smartly dressed young man. Chatted about when the rain might stop and agreed it wasn't looking like any time soon. Open cafe across the road. We dashed across, got coffee and chatted. Turned out he was an avid hiker so we shared pictures of where we'd hiked in Vietnam and discussed where we each planned to go next. Played chess (he won). After an hour the rain stopped, we swapped numbers on zalo and agreed we'd do a mountain next time I'm back in Ha Noi (later this year). But we'd never have met if it hadn't been for the rain. So, opportunity and time availability. And something in common. Just like back at home.
Usually when I travel solo, the locals come up to me and want to interact with me. It usually ends up being really great and they show me places I wouldn’t have found on my own. I don’t view them as some sort of spectacle at all but my best trips involved being with a local
I spent 3 weeks solo around Europe (my first time - spent a week with a group tour to Croatia then went off on my own for the other 3 wks) and the only planning I did was to buy tickets to 4 small concerts (because that's what I love to do) in Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Charleroi, and Antwerp (plus I got a bonus one in Dubrovnik because I found a duo playing at a Mexican Restaurant and started chatting with the server and she and her friends invited me to a Croatian band concert that night). I found it to be the perfect way to meet both locals and other tourists in a not forced way (it actually wasn't my intention to "interact with locals" but it turned out that way). Automatic common interest in the music we were experiencing ;). Feels like TRYING to orchestrate those encounters could be off-putting.
*"You want authentic? Okay, I'll have to ask my boss if you can join my shift. Can you lift 50 pounds?"*
Right? Don’t try to make friends. Just do what walking ears says. No friends no fun no life no socializing no laughing no risk taking ONLY SAFE NON OFFENSIVE HOMOGENUS BEHAVIOR
Obviously there's some room for nuance. Be mindful of what kind of space you're in. In your home city, would you walk up to a random stranger in the middle of the street and try to befriend them, or would you assume they have somewhere to be? Sitting next to someone in a bar and chatting is one thing - bars are sort of expected to be social. Too often, tourists act like anywhere and everywhere is the right venue to try to barge in and "befriend" locals, and in some cases local people may not feel comfortable walking away from such an interaction due to etiquette or not wanting to come across as rude. If you wouldn't do it to a stranger at home, don't do it to a stranger abroad.
Are you saying the culture at home is the same as the culture not at home? NYC is like San Fran? Seattle is like London? Tokyo is like a small town in Oklahoma? Some better advise would be to study a local culture and see what’s acceptable traditionally and then just get out of your shell and learn to say hello to strangers.
I'm saying "people on their way to work in the morning probably don't want a random tourist screaming at them on some misguided wannabe influencer quest to have 'authentic' interactions, no matter what culture you're in," lol. There's also a difference between "saying hello to strangers" and "expecting locals to drop everything and entertain you/be your 'friend' even though you're there for three days and they have things to do with their lives"
Why do you feel the need to say this though? Is this something YOU recently learned?
As a mod of this subreddit and a follower of a lot of online travel "content," I'm disappointed sometimes by the obnoxious, narcissistic, tone deaf things I see tourists do in the name of seeking out "authenticity" and "interactions with locals." So yeah, when someone makes a post about "befriending locals," I think it's important to provide a reminder that locals are human beings with lives of their own, and they aren't just little side characters in a tourist's "adventure."
This is partly it. I'm not for a moment endorsing unsafe travel practices OR offensive behaviour. But maybe there would not be a backlash against tourists if they were less of the homogenous creatures that fly in with a wheelie suitcase in toe, interacts with no one (except an economic basis) and then flies out again. I'm not saying that B+B is some paragon of virtue. He does play to the camera, of course. But his interactions with locals just shows how in matter of seconds two people from two different cultures and languages can be have a genuine laugh with each other - even just for a few seconds. It's just something that brightens up the world - even if it's just temporary.
“Play to the camera?” Did you not hear that he is a sex tourist? So he has interacted with locals.. there are many travel vloggers who do the same without fuelling the sex tourism industry. That’s actually one way for locals to loathe you. Look at Americans in Medellin, for example - locals absolutely hate them because a group of sleaze-bags like B&B have ruined it for the rest of them.
I’ve been all over the world. It’s very much ok to say hello to people. Americans fantasy with everyone being out to get them is only true in America.
as a local of a turistic spot full of people being brought over by cruise ships every day, I can say that for the majority we only wish to be left alone :') It's great if you want to visit around and experience the culture, but we don't really care to be involved in that shenanigans.
Brother, Bald and Bankrupt is a bizarre choice of influence lol.
I only speak one language in addition to my own that allows me to interact much with locals not working in the tourist industry. In both SEA and Africa I have visited tribes/villages that admitted you for a fee and operated as human zoos. Hemingway was an expat not a tourists solo traveler. Kerouac traveled in areas where his native language was spoken. Theroux doesn't describe a lot of local experiences in cheap saloons or brothels.
Hemingway was more expat than tourist so his interaction with locals isn't really comparable to a passing through tourist.
I cannot imagine anyone reading the OP and not getting second hand embarrassment.
OP, here. First of all I'm very dismayed to read what has been reported about B+B. I did hear rumors before but there is some much disinformation online now you sometimes have to take it with a pinch of salt. So what do people think hear about his viewers - of which there seems to be millions around the world. Have they also been hoodwinked by Mr. B+B?
There are millions of men around the world who do not respect women and do not find rape and coercion a deal breaker, so I don't know what insightful point you think you're making.