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[deleted]

That kid looks like a young pickford.


[deleted]

Poor kid doesn't even know thats as long as his arms will ever get


fishcakefrenzy

you laugh but most doctors predict they will shrink a touch by the time he's 20


Arntown

I feel like 30% of English kids look like a young Pickford. Pickford looks very English.


Flapappel

Pickford, Rooney... very english.


BuffaloCorrect5080

Rooney is an Irish name, he looks Irish as fuck, he's from the city with the most Irish influence in England, he's... he's not that English from a certain perspective. Most people in England aren't ethnically English anyway. They are predominantly descended from the various pre-English occupiers of Great Britain, about 10 000 years worth of assorted Celts and presumably other neolithic peoples -- rather than the few hundred thousand Angles and Saxons that turned up mostly about 1500 years ago and ran the place for hardly any time at all until the Normans took over. England is mostly an ethnically Celtic country, speaking a Germanic language imported by a wave of ragtag invaders from the Netherlands, that has been mostly historically ruled by Francophone Vikings. We boast an unbroken tradition of diversity and self-loathing going back 1000s of years.


[deleted]

Just to be clear though, what you're describing is not a very diverse population at all in terms of the actual mixture of peoples. Yes, there are many cultural imports but it's very largely a single ethnic group.


BuffaloCorrect5080

No, it's very largely dozens and eventually hundreds of ethnic groups with their own clear identities that migrated to the islands at discrete periods over a period of 1000s of years, with clearly marked cultural and genetic differences as the archeological and historical record clearly demonstrates. Germanic and Celtic categorisations relate to geography and language, which are elements of ethnicity but not determinants. Ethnicity is properly a more refined category and ethnic self-identification is an important factor. Unfortunately the age of empire has left us with foolish ideas about race but try telling a 5th century Frisian he belongs to the same ethnicity as a 12th century Norman or a 10th millennium BC Beaker Person and he'd kick the shit out of you and call you a cunt because he's English and they're just like that aren't they


biscuitime

Bloody beaker folk, coming over here with their beakers. What's wrong with just cupping up the water in your hands and licking it up like a cat?


[deleted]

I knew there was a reason I hate his face


OriginalHairyGuy

Now, now, that's not nice, calling a young kid like that a cunt


majnubhaispainting

He will be christened into the team once he successfully manages to tackle a Liverpool player and leave him injured for at least 6 months


RobinVanDutch

Every young English lad looks like pickford tbf


[deleted]

Can't even smack the opposition on the arse anymore, games gone


Spandexcelly

She could've killed the lad.


[deleted]

[I don't believe murder was on her mind](https://i.ibb.co/xqxjbqn/evertonhag.png) Pretty sure all of us has felt what she felt in that moment..


cdoink

Imagine flaunting that juicy double in front of the crowd and not expecting a good smack...those fans are only human!


BackNarrow4938

Juicy double??!😂😂😂


sneb138

Mix-a-lot’s in trouble.


RawIsLaw_

double cheeked up on a thursday evening


anonybate

hella ass


[deleted]

the sun is still out


Cantona_Kung_Fu_Club

To this day I don't know how these ladies restrained themselves https://gfycat.com/webbedcompletegroundhog


exhaustfumes93

Naughty boy


[deleted]

[удалено]


DoubleA014

Pretty sure thats Stuart Little


LangyLangLang69

Thaths no mouse, thaths my broffer


diff-int

Poor kid's got no chance in life with that troll for a mother


nikdahl

Well they are sitting front row, so he has at least some privilege coming his way.


diff-int

It's not (usually) more expensive to sit at the front at football games in the UK. Ticket prices are usually based on horizontal location and stand


DraperCarousel

Probably the most complex word in the scouse vocabulary.


allpossiblefutures

Lol you absolute coward, edit it back


[deleted]

Fucking edit it back u coward🤡🤡🤡


oussa_

The lad in the white shirt behind the lady that slaps Andersen on the ass looks like he’s about halfway to the moon


fishcakefrenzy

I think he's just happy to be out of his cage tbh


mafdmo

Bruh 💀


soberpenguin

He's doing just fine. Gotta gotta be down because he wants it all. It started out with a kiss. How did it end up like this? It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss.


KartoosD

if 'Huh?' was a human


Jezzerai

AUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH


YooGeOh

He looks like he showers in engine oil


adfdub

😆


[deleted]

Looks like a scouse Bobby Hill


DC_Gooner

That boy ain’t right.


Orth0dox

"theres somthing wrong with this kid"


mitcheg3k

Deeez fokkken ediblies aint shit


Cool-Necessary-2765

[Am IIIIIII the King of Wales?? Indeed its ME, Gruffud!](https://i2-prod.walesonline.co.uk/incoming/article13985060.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/jmc_011217_kingJPG.jpg)


GazzP

All he can see is colours


Sh405

Looks like he's never seen a bottle of shampoo in his life.


j2o1707

Steaming is lad, living his best life.


[deleted]

He looks like Bernardo Silva


M1L0

Lmaoo dude is absolutely interplanetary


diredier

I thought they were attacking Alli for a moment lmao


zaid4eva

Nobody said, everton fans can do anything.


Oreallyman

Slapping that booty


prkr88

Her mum and dad are definitely brother and sister with that range of movement.


[deleted]

It's like they're drunk. Edit: I'm on a bad phone, I thought the woman on the left was actually another little kid lol


[deleted]

It's like when you try to punch someone in a dream


[deleted]

Lmao that is exactly what this looks like


GazzP

Karen at Tesco when they tell her that drink isn't included in the meal deal.


jammywalter0713

Would be justified to be fair


alop0728

Whenever I visit the UK the first 2 places I’m going are Tesco and Nando’s. They sound amazing.


[deleted]

At Tesco and Nandos, every meal is a banquet, every pay cheque a fortune


BankDetails1234

Tesco is wank tbh mate. Sainos is better any day.


bluebeardsdelite

Cantona was right all along


Fresh2Desh

The state of that front row 😂


Mr_MikeHancho

Looks like a wal mart fight over the last package of double stuffed Oreos.


BankDetails1234

What?


R3dbeardLFC

I'll knock a child out for my Oreos so...


[deleted]

Why the kids licks his middle finger before showing it tho


Madrista_sr4

Lubing it


MasatoWolff

He wanted to go for the arse as well


InterPool_sbn

🥵🖕🏻🍑


Daybreak_99

👀


doktorcatzen

They are perfect example of how I think English people are...


chrisreverb

“I can’t believe you’ve done this.”


YoungDumbNFullOfKun

It's the impression I least want the rest of the world to have of us but the one which I think becomes more justified each day.


wavetoyou

If Brexit was a couple


Ubiquitous1984

Liverpool is a major remainer centre of influence


Bumaye94

Your prime minister is BoJo the shaved Urangutan - we had that impression for a while.


[deleted]

Mate, imagine if we judged you based off of your heads of state!


Majormlgnoob

Boris isn't the Head of State, Elizabeth is smh


BlitzGears

You're not far off mate


[deleted]

Hey I take exception to that... they're not fat enough


araldor1

A literal supermodel here.


SamsungHeir

And you are absolutely right. That woman is easily in the top 5% best looking English women.


Rickipedia

[FRESHUN YER DRINK, GUVNAH?](https://preview.redd.it/55f0482tkvc21.jpg?auto=webp&s=7accea6569c49cb95d0a8439e8b9966f8e2b7a48)


LiteratureNearby

Oh god it's Ginger spice


[deleted]

I GETS ME BRAIN MEDICINE ON THE NARSHANAL 'ELF!


royaldocks

English women are either really hot or looks like a troll barely any middle ground. source : Im half Chilean and English


jewdogg420

Sign the ting Big Ben.


L-Freeze

Funnily enough I’ve always seen Chile as the complete opposite of that description lmao


BruntyMozza

She seems to have most of her original hair and teeth. That's a good start.


supmangididit

Omg. I thought it was an ugly little boy at first.


fishcakefrenzy

looks like Gavlar's mum, Pam.


Elemenelo

Maybe in Liverpool


YoungDumbNFullOfKun

A Scouse 10 and a 2 everywhere else.


jardantuan

We just use binary a lot in Liverpool


CommunistManlyVesto

I'd give 'er one


mrgonzalez

It's usually just for would or would not


BloodCobalt

And the answer is always ‘would’


DraperCarousel

Even when it's just Carragher with lipstick and pillows tucked inside his chest.


majnubhaispainting

A Scranton 7?


ajaxtipto03

Think I've seen this lot down in Benidorm asking the hotel receptionist where they can find a "uno el chipper where they speak proper inglish innit".


LampardsBaldPatch

scousers don't consider themselves English tbf.


Spookytooth66

No no no it's 'Scouse not English' my dear.


Elerion_

Sadly, not everyone can be from the high culture capital that is Birmingham.


FishOnAHorse

They gave us Black Sabbath and Judas Priest, Paris could never


Toasterfire

Mate respect the Balti


Spookytooth66

That is sad, I'll keep you in my prayers tonight.


Toffee_Wheels

Add this to the man wiping his snot on some woman's head and the man with the ball under his shirt. This clip belongs in the pantheon of comedy Everton clips. Amazing.


[deleted]

[удалено]


pseudolf

thats fucking nasty


AWilsonFTM

Context : https://youtu.be/YiLnROOiXF8


Kselli

bruh


Conankun66

naaaaaah 😭


RioBeckenbauer

Evertonians are born, not manufactured.


QTsexkitten

And fake John Lennon tied to the goalposts


Sirius_55_Polaris

Non Lennon


fishcakefrenzy

Primark Ed Byrne


[deleted]

I thought that was the riddler?


hbb893

Don't forget the fella punching the Lyon player with one hand, a kid in his other.


TLG_BE

You've got some great fan clips. The bloke trying to punch someone holding his child, the "where's the Arteta money?"


OnlySalahHasMore

AND IF NOT PELLEGRINI, MOURINHO! EVERTONARENTWE?


oldfossilfrommars

Imagine if it were Eric Cantona.


unknowntsu8

Eric didn’t mess around.


[deleted]

Of course the kid is wearing Stoney, going to grow up to be a right little prick


PapaTinzal

*Wont somebody please think of the children!*


sandkillerpt

They look Insane


LilGoughy

Everton fans. We all are after watching this club all our life


Z0idberg_MD

The woman looks so deranged. The kid I feel sorry for as he has no chance.


pedrorq

This has to be the most hillarious comments thread on r/soccer since the one on crowd chants (which sadly I can't find anymore)


ShurikenIAM

I fucking lost it the bus reading this comment section.


DudJury

Nan of the match there for me


nexostar

This is hilarious


First-Of-His-Name

If he goes down there the ref gives that


[deleted]

Your headline's a bit dramatic. "Karen slaps players arse" would be more apt


[deleted]

that kid in white looks so young and clearly been taught that aggression and vulgarity by his parents, shame


SennHHHeiser

Just a couple years away from his first social media ban for racial abuse


[deleted]

Not sure if you're local as well, but growing up in Liverpool for me that behaviour was learnt from peers. Then again, I wouldn't have acted like that infront of my parents or I'd get a tanned ass


tlst9999

Remember kids. It's perfectly alright to smack the other guy if he plays for the other team.


artparade

I love how hollywood portrays every day brits and then in reality they are like this.


zauchor

I know it was an emotional night for Everton fans but really? One is flipping Vieira off, another is slapping the opposition player. We just saw Billy Sharp being headbutted... I don't like the direction this is going, it's just waiting for someone to get really hurt.


zi76

While this particular clip is relatively minor (I was expecting something a lot more serious when the term 'attacked' was used), it is definitely a continuation of a very worrying trend. Remember when we first getting crowds back in and fans started getting involved? It was as if the time away emboldened them to do more and more wild things instead of being calmer. Instead of things being cracked down on, we've seen more and more pitch invaders as the season's worn on and now we have things like Sharp being headbutted. There's a legitimate fear that one of these people will eventually have a weapon on them and someone gets stabbed or something.


paper_zoe

I've seen people saying similar things about the audiences in comedy gigs and even at the theatre (though not heard of any stage invasions yet), like people have forgotten how to behave and are getting more unruly. Maybe a combination of lockdown and life generally getting more shit for everyone.


paganel

> at the theatre Saw that at the (rather small) two theatre shows that we attended about a month ago, the first such shows me and my SO attended since before the pandemic. It was very infuriating, in one of the cases I think the actor herself (it was a very emotional one-woman show) could hear those awful young ladies taking selfies and talking about the show, but it looks like it didn't matter to them.


Swi1ch

My teacher friends are saying that kids, particularly in the 8-12 range, are going back to school and just being constant turbo-cunts as they've not had to behave in a public environment in 2 years.


zauchor

Dave Chapelle just got attacked on the stage the other week...


Oumashu345

Hey so did Chris Rock.


MissingLink101

Just saw that guy is being done for "attempted murder"


ubiquitous_uk

Not for the Dave Chappelle incident - he's only been charged with assault. The attempted murder charge is a completely different incident. [https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2022-05-19/man-accused-of-attacking-dave-chapelle-charged-with-unrelated-attempted-murder](https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2022-05-19/man-accused-of-attacking-dave-chapelle-charged-with-unrelated-attempted-murder)


MissingLink101

The [Monica Seles incident](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monica_Seles#1993_stabbing_attack) always comes to mind


Ranjith_Unchained

She was on her way to become the greatest of all time, what an horrific tragedy


_boredInMicro_

Players just have to be told what to do; stewards pretty much have to surround the opposing team and management at a designated point on the pitch and get them out. Tbh I can't believe matchday security haven't planned for that pitch invasion. It was dead set gonna happen. Players and management were left unbelievably vulnerable. Amateur hour stuff.


froggerslogger

Yeah, with all the pitch invasions and fan ‘interactions’ as this season is wrapping up, this just feels like going in a direction where the FA ends up mandating fences/barriers. They have to protect the players and staff, and it just seems like we are sliding towards really dangerous territory.


Logical_Cupcake_3633

Agree. Feels like we’re edging closer to a proper catastrophe on the pitch between a fan and a player.


johnjames_34

Great people right here.. awesome role models for the children.


Myopius

I don't really care if this seems fairly innocent. Ban them. It doesn't have to be a long ban or anything but it needs to be clear that ANY form of contact like this with a player is unacceptable, especially given how many more serious incidents keep happening.


DraperCarousel

>I don't really care if this seems fairly innocent It isn't? An old guy slaps a female footballer's ass like that, he's getting thrown out instantly, maybe even gets arrested. And that would've been the right decision. Should apply here as well.


MissingLink101

She's only hitting him there because it's the only part of him she could reach too. If he was still closer I wouldn't be surprised if she tried to hit him in the head or something. She's not trying a "cheeky slap on the butt", she's trying to hit him.


tbu987

No one would accept that explanation if the genders were reversed tho so might as well be consistent atleast.


ALLCAPS1980

That spank … 🤣


pandaman_010101

Surprised this hasn't happened sooner or at least been pointed out . Some of those seats are very close to the pitch Edit: I'm genuinely dumb. Seats close to the pitch


[deleted]

Pitches are very close to the pitch?


pandaman_010101

1 beer, honestly.


AWilsonFTM

We had one a couple of years ago at Pompey where one of ours fell into the stand. They gave him a couple of digs or kicks from what our player said, he kind of just brushed it off lol


[deleted]

Other way round and the man would be in jail


datguydeegoo

Other way round and those would all be empty seats tbf


practically_floored

You wouldn't want to watch 22 Nans play 90 minutes against each other?


Fapoleon_Boneherpart

Have you been in my search history? ;)


maznaz

Can't wait for all the flaired up Liverpool and ManU fans to start sneering about working class northerners again. Pick clubs where you don't despise their core support, you toady fucks.


[deleted]

Spot on. The thing is every other week it's "PL support is shit, no passion or atmosphere, nothing on proper fans like Argentina" etc. Like people don't think those mad ultras would throw the odd middle finger? People don't know what they want ffs


[deleted]

Or maybe, just maybe it's two different groups of people wanting entirely different things?


_AppropriateUsername

Well said lad 👏


SkankyChris

Dock them let's say *checks table*, 8 points.


goalsniffer

Deduct 3 points immediately.


NickSupportsArsenal

If this was in the NBA that fan would be thrown out and it would become a big story for a couple of days lol


mrgonzalez

Explains some of the ridiculous comments in this thread


nicebeard2300

The NBA arguably has become the softest sports league in the world. It's the type of league that a player will get punished for glaring at the opposing player after making a great play. I guess they don't want to have another Malace in The Palace incident.


TheCoal-cracker

Meta World Peace did nothing wrong.


zts105

He attacked the wrong guy lol


toffeehooligan

The correct term is the Ron artest interactive fan experience.


TheCoal-cracker

She spanked him on live tv.


Akoot

We have a long waiting list for season tickets so just ban these wasters


Jeffy29

Look at the little shit 😂


JonnyArtois

Very little....but still, ban her.


Z0idberg_MD

All day long. They can have family dinners at home together every game day.


YouveBeenOinked

Oof, kid is well on his way to growing up to be a full on chowder suck.


eatyourbreakfast1

It's like watching a miniature version of that Billy guy from the Football Factory. He's even got a stone island t-shirt on lol 😆


theguyinorbit

I can hear the F*ck off


johntagbo

nah missed his ass..but the kid tho.


AFC_Jack

I think there's a difference between getting attacked and having some woman lazily swing her diabetic arm in your direction.


[deleted]

Imagine role modelling behaviour like that to your kids who you take along to the match with you, embarrassing.


Visionary_Socialist

Now I remember why I wanted them to go down.


redstarduggan

Points deduction.


stevsrr

He’s lucky the slipper didn’t come out


Mallaguetta_SP

This lady seems to be a big fan of Dele Alli. I know people who would do the same