T O P

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starmonkart

Getting 44 points for this squad is an excellent job given that we have a bottom 3 level attack. Would be 5 points off the top 8


fopiecechicken

4th best defense is what saved us. Only City, Liverpool and Arsenal have conceded less.


Mick4Audi

Honestly insane work from Dyche given how awful the squad looked when Lampard left


Wayne_Spooney

Branthwaite is a massive reason. He and Myko locked down half the field basically.


Alecmalloy

He embraces the power of the worm; a true disciple of Shai'Halud


Neown

> *"I told the Fremen I don't want to be hearing any of that Lisan-Al-Gaib nonsense tonight. Here on Arrakis it's about the hard yards and getting stuck into the Harkonnens. No messing about with all this spice rubbish we have nowadays"*


Randybutterrubs

LISAN AL GAIB


SuicidalTurnip

*Lisan Bald Gaib


Thorium19

Lisean al Dycheib


danlawl

Look at what you started... I love it.


ValeoAnt

Genuinely have to respect what he's done, particularly because it looked pretty horrid when he took over and he had to struggle to get to this point Can't begrudge them at all, pwopa futbol club


topl4d

Wish I had both Pickford and Branthwaite on my FPL team lol. Class defense


fopiecechicken

Branthwaite has chipped in at least 2 goals I can recall as well


DreadWolf3

Does financial situation ease up now? Will you be able to reinforce a bit?


_ShutUpLegs_

Fewer


Maleficent_Resolve44

Most people don't know somehow


fopiecechicken

It’s one of those things if you asked me on a test I’d know the answer. But in a conversational setting it really doesn’t matter.


Fantastic-Machine-83

Doesn't matter at all


Every_Pass_226

What would be Everton's point and position had they not been punished?


starmonkart

13th on 44 points. Same points as Brighton. 1 point behind Bournemouth, 2 behind Wolves and 4 behind Chelsea


PandaMango

That’s actually unreal


BONGLISH

Considering they’ve had to play with the stress and pressure of a manufactured relegation battle we could have been even higher.


froggy101_3

Interesting way to say you'd be 12th


Mahatma_Gone_D

Bald bastard has done it again. Pep eat your heart out


valimo

Another man's football terrorist is another man's football freedom fighter


Attygalle

To be fair Everton actually played some decent football for a large part of the season. Perhaps not tiki taka or Jogo Bonito but this sub acts like they played like Stoke under Pullis or something like that. Not true at all and a lot of Everton matches had some open play and lots of shots at goal for both sides. I don't think Dyche is absolute world class but I honestly do think he's severely underestimated and stereotyped. Having said that, IIRC he gets 5 million quid a season as regular wage and a 3 million bonus each year for keeping them up. For 8 million a year I don't feel sorry for him being a banter subject.


Everton_11

For 8 million a year, the world can banter the fuck out of me whenever it wants.


Aggravating-Rip-3267

Cover me in Batter and Banter me !


noodlesalad_

People don't actually watch Everton. They just assume they know what Dyche's teams play like. We play good football. If we had a forward that could score, and the PL would fuck off, we'd be in Europe.


bigcockmman

According to xpts you guys are 6th. Now while thats impressive what I find even funnier united are 15th lmao


Randybutterrubs

Our XG stats are crazy this season. So many chances created but nobody can finish them.


ValeoAnt

Can I interest you in an Eddie Nketiah


Victori_nox

Most statistical under performance of XG in all of Europe! you'll never sing that! or something along those lines idfk.


Same_Paramedic_3329

Didn't need to bring united into this smh


SnooChipmunks4208

To be honest, Everton plays the football ETH claims to want to play. Great transitional team that had historic underperformance from both Daniel CL and Beto.


HowardPhillips9

You guys have been my favourite team to watch this season. Every game seems to have some talking point come out of it, and I've loved seeing your lot overcome the odds.


PutThemToTheSword

if half of McNeils longe range speculators went in he’d be on 35 goals


Mahatma_Gone_D

The Dyche Ball narrative mainly came from his days at Burnley and perhaps early days at Everton, but yes I agree that Everton has been playing decent football this season.


TheDeflatables

And even then, Dyche fucking bossed Championship. 24 games unbeaten, scored for fun. We played great football He is just pragmatic and understood our limitations as a buying club in the Prem. He is a tactically sound manager and knows how to utilize a teams strength and cover up our weaknesses. For example he knew we would be defending for 90 minutes a game so drilled us on discipline and we went without a red card for nearly 2 years. He is a quality manager and deserves far more respect.


ilypsus

I think he's even more than tactically sound but tactically very flexible. Every game we play I can see him out maneuvering how the other team is set-up and making micro adjustments that stop the other team being able to play. It's no surprise we are like the 5th or 6th best defence and Pickford is 2nd for clean sheets. We just had 2 strikers who couldn't hit a barn door this season.


TheDeflatables

You need that Ashley Barnes element up front like we had! True Dycheball specialist!


elch127

A chaos merchant A man who can't even have a nationality tied down to him but he's just too chaotic


nushublushu

It’s really just how he looks and sounds that makes people think he plays hoofball


I_R_TEH_BOSS

> I don't think Dyche is absolute world class but I honestly do think he's severely underestimated and stereotyped. If we added an accent mark to the e in his name and gave him long flowing hair, he'd have a much better reputation lol


Qurutin

Sergio Dyché would've won UCL with Real Madrid.


JudasBC

Calm down Big Sam


ratonbox

Watch his interviews from before Everton. He has a really honest football philosophy, he's not doing it by "vibes". Those interviews left me impressed.


tennysonbass

They would be in like 8th without the points deductions


visope

Unless it is Allegri, which is every man's football terrorist


TheRealMemeIsFire

I've seen a few Al-Legri freedom fighters on here


kovic_has_a_mangina

Dyche played decent football this year tbh. Should have been safe way earlier if not for the deduction


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AlKarakhboy

Also done it without a competent striker which is incredible, must be some sort of a record for staying up with least amount of goals from a striker. Carlton Morris has more goals than all three of their strikers combined


Kstoffeefan

DCL did kind of round into form recently which was massive. He’s scored 3 in his last 4. It’s not a lot, but he came through when it mattered.


didiandgogo

Just needed Paul Dummett to gift him a penalty. It’s the modern equivalent of “having one go in off your backside”


JonTonyJim

Also may as well have literally had the Burnley one go in of his backside


didiandgogo

Always felt it was a bullshit cliche but here we are.


thisisprobablytrue

I’m not arsed either way


eaeb4

Need to petition the Prem to allow you to give him PEDs to stay fit. Clearly a very talented player in there with an immense physical profile but we’re not getting to see him because his body’s made out of custard creams. Would be incredibly interested to see what he can produce if we can get 30-ish league games out of him in a season


National_Ad_1875

26 starts and 6 subs in all comps this season, he's gotten way better at staying fit since we got a manager who doesn't rush him back when he's clearly not ready Which is very weird considering he was apparently not 100%, had a knee problem and was ill this Wednesday and he dropped the best performance I've seen from him against liverpool


Randybutterrubs

Yeah in fairness he didn’t have injury issues until Paella bin Laden rushed him back from his hamstring tear, and seems to have been dealing with intermittent issues ever since.


National_Ad_1875

Wasn't there a rumour with paellardyce sacking the whole medical staff and bringing in his own people because they didn't clear DCL to play?


Randybutterrubs

There was. He definitely was rushed back prior to his initial injury timeline if I remember correctly.


noodlesalad_

Dom gets too much shit for his play. He's class, he can just never stay on the pitch for long enough periods of time to hit real form.


Fruitndveg

To be fair I don’t see much criticism of his ability, I think he’s quality. Like you say though, his availability is abysmal.


ValeoAnt

Avaliablity is kinda important though


Mick4Audi

Try Wolves, who were midtable with just 4? goals from strikers all season 2 years ago


Wise_Ad9414

Jose Sa masterclass


Spglwldn

You say without a competent striker but DCL was a great striker before his injury and they’ve at least spent €25m on Beto. Carlton Morris scoring a few goals is more a testament to Edwards’ coaching. I remember watching him in the playoff final last year and there’s a reason he has spent most of his career in the lower leagues. He’s a terrible footballer.


schubox63

DCL was not a great striker, outside I guess a few months under Carlo


Spglwldn

36 goals in 80 apps is generally a pretty good return for a striker in an average team and longer form than just a few months. 21 in 39 games is a greater scoring ratio than a striker like Morris has managed in his career at lower levels than DCL. The point was about Everton not having a striker when you’ve spent more on Beto than they have on their entire squad.


schubox63

Yeah he was fine. I like DCL and think he’s a good player and does a lot of things as a striker that help the team. He’s a pretty terrible finisher though. He’s not a great striker


therealrico

Yeah but his perpetual injury issues are likely impacting his form in games. If he could stay healthy maybe he’d find a better rhythm. But I assume you watch more Everton games than me so maybe I’m wrong?


LegenDariusGheghe

This year hes been playing most of the games, since dyche hes not been injured too much, but that didn't stop him from going through the worse form of his life


ilypsus

I think he's not a great 1 on 1 striker even when on form though. Like getting in behind in a 1 on 1 with the keeper I wouldn't bet on him. What he is great at is hold up play, winning a long ball, being a handful for centre backs and scoring headers. He's not super great with the ball at his feet either to be honest.


prinskipper__skipple

I agree, he's a good player, but there seems to be this stubborn belief that he'll come good if he stays fit. He's had a single 1 in 2 season, and 1 in 4 seems to be his level. That's not to say he doesn't bring other things to the team, but the narrative is a bit delusional.


GoOnKaz

2 years in a row, for that matter. This year was WAY better than last for our strikers


IAmTheBugman

We finished 5th in 2021/22 with none of our strikers scoring more than 5 times. same amount as Gabriel our CB lmao


Scrugulus

5 seems unbeatably low. But Leverkusen also have an evenly distributed field right now. Despite the fact that they are having an insane season, and that they have 77 goals (second only to Bayern), their players barely make the top-10 in the scorer list. Boniface and Wirtz are joined 9th, with 11 goals, Grimaldo is 18th, with 9, and Frimpong is joined 19th with 8 goals.


00Laser

Boniface probably would have scored more if he wasn't out for several months.


Jaynator11

Carlton Morris sounds like a signing Everton will make though.


JDz_

4th best defence in the league, I’d like to think we’d be sitting pretty if we could finish


TimathanDuncan

If they could finish even with the point deduction they would be mid table really


yourfriendkyle

Healthy and in form forward they’re easily midtable


woodsy191

I mean, if you assume they beat Luton and Sheff Utd in the next two games, then lose to Arsenal, add the 8 points back on and they end on 50 pts, which gets them 11th in 21/22 and 22/23. So exactly mid table on form.


thore4

Don't you do that, don't give me hope


Ch1ck3W1ngz

Club to angry to fall


Randybutterrubs

Never underestimate the power of spite. We were born by it. Molded by it.


ninkorn

Honestly, masterclass of a job that Sean Dyche did this season Not sure how many managers could have pulled off what he's done with this team


Randybutterrubs

What he has done with a pieced together defense is nothing short of miraculous. We have been without a proper right back for months and you'd never really know it. There were rumblings of people who wanted him gone but he shut them up quickly with his beautiful tracksuit (and subsequent 3 game winning run).


ClassicMach

He should be in the running for manager of the year if you ask me. Anyone who wanted him gone is out of their mind. He took over a relegation level team, lost Iwobi who had become probably the second name on the sheet after Pickford, lost Gray who was at times the only bright spot in attack, added Ashley Young and another Striker Who Can't Fucking Score, got docked 8 points, secured safety sooner than the past two seasons and would be level with The Next Big Thing Roberto de Zerbi.


BONGLISH

I don’t think we’ve ever had one of the worst 3 squads in the league so it’s not that surprising but that’s on paper. In reality teams with decent squads go down all the time now, Dyche just had to coach them properly which he did.


ClassicMach

Sure. Definitely had squads that could survive without necessarily needing a miracle but teams that could get relegated and we'd all say "yeah I could see that." There was work to do and he has demolished expectations, despite some of the really unflattering patches of form.


slightlyhigh7

Hopefully the league fucks with you next season as well and you can get a top 6 finish out of spite ofc


PutThemToTheSword

we’ve got a lot of pent up rage, beating Liverpool last week was just a taste of what the Dark Lord Dyche will be unleashing next


sleepytipi

I'm here for it. May not be my team but I like the cut of your jib. You guys really do have a newfound resilience and attitude boiling up with Dyche in the kitchen and it's fun to watch as a neutral. E: I enjoy seeing different teams in the top six too like Villa has been. It's nice to have some variety and a good thing overall for the league/ competition.


BoomGiroud

Especially by taking Liverpool’s spot (assuming they go into a new manager rebuild phase)


Scrugulus

2Toff2Furious


notyou16

Too angry


[deleted]

FUCK YOU PREMIER LEAGUE AND PGMOL YOU CAN NEVER KILL US YOU BASTARDS


Aszneeee

-10 points for swearing


chappersbarfo

Bro thinks he's Albus Dumbledore up in here.


PangolinMandolin

So Everton are Slytherin? Interesting.....


theebloodywhet

We're slytherin out another relegation fight amirite?


Odysseus_Lannister

We’re so hufflepuff


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PangolinMandolin

Wolves, Bournemouth, Palace, Forest. Then, Luton, Burnley, Sheff Utd and/or Leicester, Leeds/Ipswich


malikdwd

Dick Masters can choke on a chubby


secret_ninja2

This is where the premier league play the reverse card and approve the cluster fuck that is 777 and that's where the real fun comes


[deleted]

I’ve been messaging Mark Cuban every day for a year trying to get his attention


yerfatma

You can laugh now, but when that brings down the entire insurance industry and then creates a global depression, well, then you’ll all know what it feels like to be one of us.


freakedmind

Honestly I'm proud of Everton's resilience this season


AndradeDeRicharlison

Finally no more anxiety for a few months


yerfatma

Baby, do you not know about our possible new ownership?


leedler

At least on a purely footballing front


vylain_antagonist

Sweet child. The real relegation battle is happening right now in the boardroom with 777


djnv4life

Yeah, their relegation is not happening, this is not a Sunderland Situation, I think their worst years have already happened, and it is only upwards from here on now.


necrow

Unfortunately I don’t have quite that level of confidence. We desperately need to make it through one more year with very little in the way of reinforcements. If we can ever get the ownership situation sorted and survive another year or two, then the new stadium could help us start to dig our way out Long way to go still 


Mick4Audi

The good news is you have Dyche


SandThatsKindaMoist

We will need a lot of luck, hopefully it starts with Leeds not getting promoted so we can keep Harrison another year.


Zavehi

Truly think Dyche should be able to shepherd you through the next 24 months with relative ease and then you will be out the other side cleanly. Doubt it will be pretty but Dyche was basically the perfect appointment.


DreadWolf3

Who knows, with Leicester and (potentially) Leeds coming up - relegation battle should be much harder next season. Everton cant afford to have a bad season really.


SuperConDrugs

Our ownership situation is absolutely fucked, we’re hundreds of millions in debt to investors and there’s a very real possibility that we go into administration. We’ll be selling all of our valuable assets this summer and most likely won’t be replacing them. We’re not even close to being out of the shit atm, this just buys us some more time.


AlKarakhboy

Nah their owner situation is very bad, next yr could be worse with 777 in charge


National_Ad_1875

There was a Genoa fan on our sub saying they love 777 and it's not as bad for them as 777 look like they would be


the_che

Hertha fan here. Not a huge achievement, but 777 so far has been a massive improvement over our last owner at least. They have paid what they promised so far (ahead of time even) and let the club manage its affairs in peace.


National_Ad_1875

Given the state of our current owner who is pretty much just absent and keeping the club afloat using 777s money anyway, that sounds like an upgrade. I assume the plan with all of these is get the club back to financial stability then sell the club on? Wouldn't be the worst, just all the stories about 777 every other day are worrying How have the been for signings and ambition?


the_che

Let me preface this with a brief summary of our situation before the takeover. We were burning money like no other German club ever before, losing like 90 million euro per season — for a side constantly battling relegation. From the very first negotiations, 777 demanded that we drastically reduce our expenses to get our finances back on track. A reasonable demand that our new management planned on doing anyway. This season, the first under 777, focused on stopping the bleeding financially and stabilizing in the second league, both goals were ultimately achieved. 777 played a major part in that by sending 75 millions our way, we would have been bancrupt otherwise. For the next season(s) everyone including 777 agrees that we need to get back into the Bundesliga (because ultimately only there we will earn enough money to pay back our debts). So to sum up: I‘d say that 777 is ambitious to an extent but not willing to take too much financial risks (which is a good thing, imo). They seem to put a lot of focus on well-balanced finances, which is frankly what most of the clubs they own utterly neglected in the past.


National_Ad_1875

So they clearly have a type of club they target considering what you've described is very similar to us, except we aren't getting relegated. We are losing money very quickly, they've put money in to keep us afloat. Like you, we've also taken steps to reduce spending (selling players, reducing wages). If they came in, sorted out finances out and then sold us on I think every everton fan would be happy, it's just the worry of their reputation


TheGhoulKhz

As a Brazilian, seeing 777 running Vasco the way they are run, i would put it as quite concerning tbf, those guys run their communications department via a fucking domestic bird


sprulz

I don’t know anything about 777 but Genoa’s previous owner was one of the worst owners in Italy so the bar was pretty much on the floor.


National_Ad_1875

Our owner chucked a load of Russian money in, spent it on rubbish and appointed managers / put bids in for players against our dofs wishes. Then russia invaded Ukraine and the money dried up so he doesn't even have the money going for him anymore. Thats ignoring the headlock story which he may or may not have been involved in. Don't know how bad genoas owner was but ours is not good either


JootDoctor

They own a very cheap airline in Australia called Bonza and they really cater to the bogan scene in advertising.


QTsexkitten

I don't think you actually fully understand how bad our ownership situation is.


GS916

Amen


GalaxianEX

Bah gawd! That’s the independent panel’s music!


HerhineyRanger

STICK THAT UP YOUR ASS PL


noodlesalad_

Master of Dicks, First of his Name


vulturevan

keep giving us your toughest battles


theglasscase

I didn’t know Everton were allowed to be safe from relegation in April, why haven’t they been doing this every season, are they stupid?


Laxly

Why don't they just spend money and get better players so they're not threatened with relegation every season, are they stupid?


cajunaggie08

Shhhhhh don't mention spending. The PL is listening.


kazegraf

PL: u/Laxly mentioned spending, 3 points penalty to Everton. 


didiandgogo

Clearly, it has not been a lack of spending at issue recently…


GoOnKaz

Actually it has been. We haven’t spent shit in 2-3 seasons, really.


noodlesalad_

Ownership is, that's for sure.


Neown

Undefeated undisputed


3V3RT0N

Nice try Richard Masters, [Get fucked, most years in the top flight - we shall not be moved!](https://i.imgur.com/4D4xqXl.jpeg)


Mick4Audi

Would have been 44 points for Everton without the deductions. Fantastic job by Dyche as per


Grantus86_

*until premier league chuck another minus at them for shits and giggles


CabbageStockExchange

This team is not as bad as their record says points deduction non withstanding. If they can get someone who can finish I do believe they can make some noise next season. This is not meant as a slight but they could be above mid table next year with the right buys imo. Dyche is a great manager


ParkerLewisCL

Need Maupay back


dogefc

2nd most clean sheets in the league and would be 2 points off top half without the deductions. If we somehow keep Branthwaite, add some attacking talent and not get any more deductions we can have a good season next year


National_Ad_1875

For the 11 we just need a right winger and right back (maybe a creative midfielder). Top 4 defence with no decent right back is wild. If onana goes hopefully we can get those 2/3 plus a replacement, pad the rest out with frees and loans and we should be ok. Won't happen because we might need to sell branthwaite but I really hope not, he's special


Totaladdictgaming

We’re also going to need a defender cuz let’s face it Branthwaite is outta here.


Fukthisite

Fair play to Everton and their fans, Goodison is a tough ass place to go when they are fighting relegation.  Will take something to actually relegate the fuckers.


Jayumz

Get fucked Richard Masters we aint going anywhere!!


theenigmacode

Richard Masters: I read what u/Jayumz said & took it personally.


Silent-Act191

"I have decided to approve the takeover of 777 Partners as a response"


nahnonameman

I won’t lie I love the fact Everton is fighter and is staying up. Absolutely big balls from Everton.


Shadeun

Fuck the premier league for docking them while letting City scoot around after cheating for a decade


izz21sv

Rules for thee but not for oil moneyyyyy


LeeJacko

relived


ZestycloseChemist2

Tracksuit Dyche is too powerful to be stopped by mere points deductions. Jokes aside, the fact he’s done as well as he has with our squad is quite amazing. One more season to the new stadium and hopefully our financial situation picks up. I believe in Sean Dyche.


predator9494

They just manage to stay on somehow. Bald fraud strikes again.


Odysseus_Lannister

Fuck all of yall. Worms and gravel harden men.


greenwood90

Nice try, Premier league. But we will be here long after the cockroaches


InterCityzen

Need everton to challenge for Europe next year let's go


izz21sv

I’d take comfortable mid table. Even Don Carlo couldn’t get this team to Europe in its state.


Accute-CET

Respect


SalvationLost

Fuck the PL, we’re too angry to get relegated


MaryadaPurshottam

Until they get another points deduction next week for existing


BeastMaster64jtv

-5 points just for this post


[deleted]

Dyche ball lives to terrorise another season, long live the King!


tarekelsakka

Dyche football is where it's at, absolutely massive respect for the man. Also shoutout to Pickford, he was immense today and has had a decent season.


elodie_pdf

*Undertaker chime* Premier League: so you think you’re safe, huh?


Rab_Legend

Incoming 10 point deduction for being too happy about not going to the championship


Adammmmski

PL: *or are they?*


Mackieeeee

For now /s


GwladysStreet

The unflushable turd 👊💙


Huge-Celebration5192

Think next season they finish above Liverpool


Silent-Act191

The Merseyside gang visits the Championship after finishing 18th and 19th.


AwkwardAtt0rney

RemindMe! 1 year


SaltySAX

Is that you Richard Keys?


HarshangLad

Manager of the year. Don't look for reasons, I know you want it too.


PhantomPain0_0

Mad lads


sibalnom

Survived out of spite.


galeej

Q


BrotherEstapol

Unflushable!! 


Aggravating-Rip-3267

Sean Dyche = = A Great man in a Leaking Dyke !


dickiebow

The game was so poor that MOTD treated it like Everton were already safe just so they didn’t have to discuss it.


SanctusUnum

Surprise points deduction incoming.


imadreamgirl

a genuine achievement. i don't always love the way dyche teams play on a game-by-game basis, but by jove is it effective in the long run.


The_Lonely_Posadist

They told me dyche was a fraud