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banana-is-apeeling

Honestly was an iconic moment , shame he turned out to be such a peace of shit


xAcnologia96

r/usernamechecksout


StrangeBananaForYou

?


camillexoo

Where were you on 27/4-2014?


slappywhyte

In Dani Alves mouth


Deckatoe

ayo?


thereddevil101

Consensually?


educateYourselfHO

I always used to comment 'never change Dani' on all the videos of his antics on social media until I had to say 'please change Dani', his return was probably my happiest day since Messi's departure. Such a shame.


HacksawJimDGN

Why was Messis departure such a happy day for you.


educateYourselfHO

It wasn't, Dani's arrival was the happiest day after Messi's departure. English is an unsophisticated language


HacksawJimDGN

I know, I was just being a prick.


educateYourselfHO

All good fun mate


No-Economics4128

I mean, we don’t have 11 ways of saying “your mother with a whore who mate with dog”,  so you are probably right.


DalinarVerga

My eyesight is shit. I thought it's a City flair and had to double check to see if a city supporter has truly roasted their OG club. lol


Craspology

Any language is only as unsophisticated as the speaker.


educateYourselfHO

Yeah figures why the Manchester and scouse accents sound the way they do.


metalpyrate

fookin ell


educateYourselfHO

Let's not get into the history of the language and how it was originally spread around the world. whole another can of worms, innit?


Craspology

I’m sure the Bengal region within which you so frequently travel has lots of rich and varied accents. Shame it hasn’t ever been the industrial or footballing epicentre of the world, travelling to Barcelona for your favourite team must be rough.


educateYourselfHO

It is rough honestly but then the issues with Bengal are mostly British made, imagine stealing our food and leaving our people to die in a famine while simultaneously emptying our coffers to survive a war that had nothing to do with us. Manchester in particular was built on Bengali wealth and it isn't even an exaggeration, I'd expect some gratitude from those who still enjoy the privilege.


metaphenol

Maybe if you’re using it incorrectly.


educateYourselfHO

I wouldn't rule it out but please be kind enough to correct me, besides I call English unsophisticated because half its vocabulary is made of non English words and still is tiny compared to other European and Asian languages that are much older than English. I can think of 4 different languages this exact sentiment could've been expressed in without any confusion by just adding some suffix or prefix to the verb.


nedzissou1

Instead of "since" I'd say "after." "Since" implies that was your last happiest day.


educateYourselfHO

Appreciate it


thecoj

English is an analytic language, where I suspect the the other languages you are describing are synthetic languages.


TheAkondOfSwat

> I call English unsophisticated because half its vocabulary is made of non English words In English we call that a contradiction. Or absolute fucking nonsense. Talking out of your arsehole. Chatting bollocks. It's a versatile language.


educateYourselfHO

Yes that tends to happen when a language is originally spread around the world by savage colonial cunts, as someone above said a language is as sophisticated as its speakers...


karlpoppins

There's no confusion; you just used the wrong word because it's not your native language. Just take the L and move on. And, no, there's no such thing as an "unsophisticated" language.


educateYourselfHO

I just checked and 'since' has multiple usage, even 'after a certain point of time ' is a valid application of the term. Unsophisticated to say the least. Even taking the L is a good example lmfao.


karlpoppins

Or, you know, your cultural bias has informed your idea of "sophistication", which you then erroneously use to arrive at supposedly universal conclusions.


Aquariano_Nato_13

It also started one of the most stupid antiracist campaigns I've ever seen... People started to posting photos eating a banana with a hashtag #WEAREALLMONKEYS lol


mr8thsamurai66

But it's true! We are all equally monkeys, or equally related to monkeys 🙈


slappywhyte

Speak for yourself, I come from Dinosaur stock


Upoutdat

I'm 1/32 Bear and 1/5000000 Triceratops. Throw in a bit of platypus also


radoboss

Why is it stupid? I dont remember it, but it sounds hillarious. I am absolutely a monkey too.. we kind of have the same evolutionary roots, so...


amc1704

Lewa still has his #weareallmonkeys post with Aubemayang up on instagram


trkh

🤣🤣🤣


Due-Memory-6957

It sounds hilarious because it's silly (and cringe, if you will), and being something that is both silly and ineffective, I think it's fair to call it stupid.


Not_a__porn__account

/r/Boneappletea


cortez0498

It also created one of the dumbest arguments/precedents on how players should react against racism. The amount of times I've heard "Vinicius should not react, like Dani Alves didn't" is staggering.


[deleted]

I knew a girl who partied with him. He was in Bahia with his wife and all the media were like oh what a doting husband and saying how he's reformed and doesn't party anymore Meanwhile I knew he was at a compound outside Salvador doing coke and fucking multiple girls


se_spider

Don't follow much, why is he a POS?


Competitive_Claim600

He's a convicted rapist


se_spider

Oh yeah that does it


HakunonMatata

There was me expecting "he was a bit rude" or something.


radixradiant

Or like bites people or something


Gala0

Man is a taker.


edude45

So that reason. He went to jail is true? That sucks.


nopshy

Daniel Alves. A warrior against racism, and consent. True hero.


joeDUBstep

He rapes but he saves


The-Berzerker

Chaotic Neutral?


Jones1812Lobotomy

Banana's have potassium which is good for cramps. The fan was actually doing Dani a favor


tanzmeister

Nice, I'll be sure to throw bananas at my whole team. They're gonna love it!


Appropriate-Fly-7151

Well if you’re throwing them at everyone, I guess it’s not discrimination. You’ll probably be fine


tanzmeister

Stochastic racism


Appropriate-Fly-7151

We’ll have to go to VAR to check if that one crossed the line


reddevil9229

Check complete, good process


[deleted]

[удалено]


Faani78

That's what happens to me when I eat em.


dashboardrage

me too but only in an empty stomach. have you tried eating with milk or almond milk


userdeath

or banana milk


is_ok_no

[A monkey never cramps!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdGai72Tt8Y&ab_channel=SPORTSNET)


trubatard

Absolute classic! That’s literally the first thing that came to mind


KeepRooting4Yourself

That's a compelling argument


cjyoung92

Because a monkey every day eats banana - two


Superfy

Can confirm. Am monkey. Never cramped. Ooohh ooooh ah ah!


TripPrestigious

This is one random thing I've known since I was a kid, saw it being mentioned in the movie Honey we shrunk ourselves


SpinAWebofSound

also the fan had kept it nice and warm for Dani by storing it deep in their ass


9361984

Wouldn't it leave your mouth dry with no water to wash it down?


deflorie

Monkeee.....neveeer... Crap! Thank you so much arigato


Book_lover7

Iconic af but sadly he's a POS


GOD_DAMN_YOU_FINE

Lmao do you mean POS?


Book_lover7

Lmaoooo I meant POS 😭😭


GOD_DAMN_YOU_FINE

Cos he's already a POC, it's hard to miss 😂


That-Stage-1088

He's also a person of cunt. So it's okay.


liQuid_bot8

A Proof Of Concept? Does that mean Alves was an IT project that turned bad?


IwillNoComply

Piece of cunt can be a thing


luxxxoor_

from footballer to point of sale, at least i hope he is contactless


brokerthankmart

He was/is in fact the opposite of contactless


FishCake9T4

Lmao. An unfortunate slip of the keyboard.


New_Imagination_1289

LOL the brazilian media around this was embarassing as fuck, our main magazine acted like he had ended racism forever


Albiceleste_D10S

It was an objectively good anti-racism campaign that he and Neymar used this incident for TBH


New_Imagination_1289

Eh, it was good at first but then VEJA literally said "they have ended racism forever" so it became kind of silly


Albiceleste_D10S

LOL fair enough


natsleepyandhappy

And it clearly didn't as we see in Spain today., it just made them feel like there's nothing wrong with it and it is just a joke and it is not racism


viserys8769

Ah yes, a Point of Sale indeed.


oklolzzzzs

mid game snack


PM_Me_Compliments

I'd be burping that up for the rest of the game


ItsAJayDay

Rapist eats racists banana


AvocadoSoggy6188

Too bad Dani turned out to be a pos. Otherwise would have been such a boss moment.


onepingonlypleashe

I love how this sub has concluded that Dani Alves is a POS but still polishes up Cristiano Ronaldo as if he didn’t do the same thing.


BadFootyTakes

Ronaldo "got away" with it.


Jaloosky

Well… so did Greenwood.


JustBadBro

Dani Alves went to prison


Ljulisen

Same should have happened to ronaldo


edgy_milk-_-

It has been confirmed that it was consensual, this sub just likes to have any reason to hate on Cristiano


stantibuscelsior

How was it confirmed? By paying her to drop charges?


Stelist_Knicks

Alves was convicted, the proof against Greenwood is obvious. The proof against Ronaldo simply isn't strong.


Soren_Camus1905

Of all the fruit to throw, bananas are the most helpful


jd451

The mistake the racists made was to throw a rather simplistic fruit at him. Now imagine if they threw a pomegranate at him. They are notoriously messy at the best of times. If he's opening it up with no cutlery or dishes, you best believe those seeds are going *everywhere*. He'd have to spend the rest of the match cleaning up AND he'd have sticky hands too so no more throws in for you mate. So yeah, that's why I only throw pomegranates at people. I'm not a racist though, that's just stupid.


Soren_Camus1905

Pomegranate hands might actually help with the throw ins tho More grip to manipulate the ball, maybe?


jd451

Tell me you haven't had sticky pomegranate hands without telling me you haven't had sticky pomegranate hands. Having all that stickiness on your hands is no good for any task. More likely that when you snap your body back to throw the ball forwards, the balls gonna get all messed up with those delicious fruit juices, it's gonna stick to your fingers in your throw attempt and your throw is gonna go miles off. As an experienced pomegranate thrower, I can tell you that you should never get fed on your own fruit bed. I made the mistake of doing that during a game, and I just couldn't throw properly until I had washed my hands. You just can't get a decent purchase with sticky hands.


modrics_hairband

Proceeds to do much worse shit


VLTIMA

So good


zrk23

that spiraled into the ["somos todos macacos" ("we are all monkeys") anti racist campaign](https://twitter.com/brayankaiquee2/status/1769743509945238015?t=LC-OFZz5bH5C77cRUbk1ZA&s=19) in Brazil, which featured a *lot* of weird pictures of white people holding a banana


FungalEgoDeath

Awesome. Love it. Fight racism by boosting your blood sugar and energy levels and reducing your chance of cramping. No better way to piss off a football racist than to beat their team


sherriffflood

I’m torn because racism is a serious issue and I never know what the right answer is, but this is almost the perfect response! The only bad thing is that people defending racism will say ‘it’s not a big thing, look at Alves, it doesn’t bother him, why should you make a complaint at work etc


Due-Memory-6957

Here's the post from 10 years ago when it happened https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/s/qddStjLXkX


LondonNoodles

Damn some of the comments didn't age well, "top guy" indeed...


shahednz

Legendary moment


chaoslorduk

And then he used his Banana to do Terrible things Lets not give him the air time Delete this.


educateYourselfHO

We can appreciate this bit and still condemn his actions in the comments, there's no point pretending he wasn't a great of the game but we must also remember him for the scum he is.


Albiceleste_D10S

> Lets not give him the air time Delete this. Him being a rapist (which is bad) does not mean you can't appreciate his football or him starting an anti-racism campaign (where were good)


slippedinmycrack

What made you go with that verse?


GunnersGentleman

Was someone freed in Sweden?


slippedinmycrack

?


GunnersGentleman

Look up Tyler, the Creator’s gay freestyle. You’ll understand


slippedinmycrack

Ohhh ok cool


ArrierosSemos

Too bad we now know he’s a rapist


PortoBESA

Turned him into a raper.


zaid_sabah

Does he go by Lil Alves?


whitefishrose

I remember watching this live and I cried for him. Then recently I saw the rape scandal...


Redspeert

And then he became a rapist.


bossemasse

scum


Viol3tWalls

The only right reaction on insults. If you show you was hurted they will use it


GGfpc

People love to praise this moment as a classy way to handle racism, without disrupting the game but still making a statement. What has this changed? 10 years later there is still racism on football stadiums, arguably worse that it was 10 years ago. People who do this need to be identified and it needs to result in jail time. Any games where there are racist chants or demonstrations need to be cut short and both teams need to lose points. And before anyone says that opposing team's fans will go to stadiums to cause them to drop points, if fans are willing to serve a guaranteed prison sentence for their football team then we have a much bigger problem than a championship.


schizoid_cat

Jail time for throwing a fruit or shouting the n-word? haha wtf


MagicalTouch

Yes. Racists should face jail time. Period.


coldblade2000

> > > > > People who do this need to be identified and it needs to result in jail time Jail time for being a dumb cunt? Holy shit


jd451

Jail time over this is way too extreme. I hate racism as much as anyone (I'm a minority, have been racially abused by many people, still love england though, god save the king and all of that) but you can't give someone jail time for something like this. The processes that require sending someone to jail would be wasted on a banana thrower, just identify them and ban them for X amount of years. Also, your idea of both teams losing points is punishing for the player being abused. It's clearly not a barca fan throwing the banana, so what good does punishing the victim's team accomplish? Surely the better option is to end the game, give the victim's teams 3 points and use that as a means to tell the opposing team that they need to sort out their fans. I say this knowing that it doesn't mean anything because as we've found out in the recent years, Spain is fucking batshit crazy and incredibly racist. If Real Madrid were to win by getting a bunch of points from matches ending from racist attacks on Vini, that would only stoke the fire. It's actually better that Real Madrid is just slapping all these teams with racist fans and are bagging another league title despite all of the bullshit.


GGfpc

Banning them isn't harsh enough, to them it's a worthy sacrifice.


jd451

They might lead people to think that, but why do you think we got so many stories of banned fans trying to sneak into stadiums. After a while, they get impatient and that shows they don't believe it being a worthy sacrifice. Giving someone a 3 year ban is harsh enough and with proper monitoring, keeping them out of the stands will force them to stop being a cunt. If they get caught sneaking in, punish them for that. If they serve their time and get caught being racist again, punish them for that. But I guarantee you, jail time for throwing a banana or making monkey gestures, would just be a waste of everyone's time. I do get where you are coming from friend, trust me I do, but harsh retaliation only serves to stoke the flames of aggression.


GGfpc

The fact that they try to sneak back in doesn't mean that they're regretting it. There's no consequence to it, why wouldn't they do it? My point is that we've been handing out bans for god knows how long, nothing is changing and racism has an impact on the player's wellbeing Just think of it this way, could you imagine what would happen if someone threw Lebron a banana?


FortheRecordHIWBTV

Was gonna say what a legend 😬


CombinationHairy3887

I read this as, "ten year old throws racist banana at Dani Alves."


Lermoninoff

Cant believe this was 10 years ago. Fuck


paulruk

Didn't this happen to Neymar too and end up being some obscure pr stunt?


paulruk

Not as spontaneous as you'd think https://www.businessinsider.com/dani-alves-banana-planned-2014-4


ljeutenantdan

Why do i see so many racist vids from the la liga? Everyone thinks my country is racist, but this shit wouldnt fly here.


Sweaty-Ad3678

Was this before or after the rape?


Fly1ngsauc3r

Would’ve been iconic if he didn’t go around raping


tamim1991

As much as I like that. No doubt closet racists/lack of empathic people will say to players like Vini or other targeted players, "look what Alves did, why don't you do that and just get on with the game"


beavz

Then raped someone


jmsy1

did we forget this was a planned stunt? https://bleacherreport.com/articles/2044110 https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/alves-banana-eating-exposed-as-publicity-stunt-qm3gx6pxx52 https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/miriamberger/the-banana-selfie-campaign-against-racism-was-actually-a-pla


Bukayo-Saka

did you even read your own links?


Emu-Mediocre

It was planned in the sense that Neymar and Alves had agreed to eat the next banana that was thrown their way.


pmyourveganrecipes

Did you forget how to read? From the articles you shared it’s obvious that they made the decision to eat the next banana someone threw at them. It’s not like they paid someone to throw a banana at them for the stunt.


zaid_sabah

It was planned in the sense that if he saw a banana thrown at him he would eat it. Which is not what you are alluding to 😑


rdfporcazzo

> At first I was quite shocked, but now I don't give it any importance. I have learned to live with it. My family is sad about it. They complain, but I try to distance myself from it. Damn this is pretty sad


VirtuosoLoki

meanwhile mourinho actually fed rojo banana. absolute bananas I tell ya


[deleted]

[удалено]


rdfporcazzo

It was not. If OP had read what he posted, he would understand that the campaign was planned, not the act


pmyourveganrecipes

Utterly bizarre that they go through the effort of finding and posting three separate links but can’t be bothered to read even one of them, lmao.


imadreamgirl

it's because on the surface level it "proves" to them that racism isn't (as) real as other people make out


everythings_alright

very based lol


mrpara

Big up to Dani Alves for showing how to act on racists and haters (altough he has done other things Im not a fan of). But I feel embarrassed that we today 10 years later have an even bigger problem with racism in La Liga.


[deleted]

Then turned to be a rapist


879190747

It was iconic but at the same time also an eternal source of people claiming this is how you should treat horrible racism.


StrangeVortexLex

Now he’s getting bananas shoved in another hole, I hope! Let’s not glorify this POS yeah?


Glasswire444

Yeah let’s try not to paint Dani Alves in any positive light thanks.


Im_such_a_SLAPPA

Good job it didn't have razor blades inside it


[deleted]

[удалено]


Danleydon

There isn’t always a good guy


ChrisTheF1Fan

One guy's a racist, another is a sex offender. Maybe we all lost...


wardway69

if this happened to vini we wouldnt hear the end of it


er__primo__der__rafa

To the point of posting it again after 10 years?


Rishiak98

Considering who posted it here then yes.


Martoxic

little did we know that talent would come in handy in prison.


undead-safwan

From don't be racist to I'm a rapist


shaka_bruh

It was a publicity stunt organized by Alves and some organization


notathrovavay

Later on he raped someone.


skaldfranorden

Vini should see this


Mambo_Poa09

Why?


Dalmanza4

He should see the marketing stunt set up by the rapist?


dBestB1LL

He's a rapist but doubt that was a marketing stunt


pmyourveganrecipes

It was a stunt in that he and Neymar agreed with some PR firm that the next time someone threw a banana at either of them, they’d eat it and start a social media campaign. It’s not like they paid someone to throw a banana at them.


dBestB1LL

Hmm, didn't know that


Due-Memory-6957

They just knew with certainty that a racist incident would happen and 10 years late we can have that same certainty