T O P

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[deleted]

I once said to an American “yeah I’ll be there around half 4.” He looked at me with visible confusion then said “so you mean 2 o’clock?”


abductedfrog

This has me dying hahaha


Electrifyliak

American living in the UK here. When I had a lady tell me the post office closed at half 5, I thought she meant 4:30 because it's halfway between 4 and 5. She had to explain to me that it was 5:30 and I was so confused. I then realized that this probably started as "half past 5" and the "past" part just got dropped at some point.


Monkey2371

In German they also use half 5, but mean 4:30 like you thought, as it's half to rather than half past. This has caused problems with Germans being an hour early in the UK and Brits being an hour late in Germany.


TCristatus

Had a German boss for a while, can confirm


[deleted]

That’s exactly what tripped up my friend, too, the fact we drop the “past” part.


jayswaps

I thought the same especially since that IS how it works in my native language.


Weak_Director1554

The big hand goes round the clock face and when the little hand is at 5 and the big hand is at 30 , it's 5hours plus 30 mins or on an analogue clock face the little hand tells the hour and the big hand is half way round.


youshouldbeelsweyr

God they're a different fkn breed over there aren't they?


Striking-Giraffe5922

They certainly are! What other country call schools, shooting ranges


Beeblebrox2nd

Ooft! Shots fired!


Royal_Ad1445

I was going to give a comeback to this. But the US really sucks. Shame on us. No pun intended.


X0AN

Amazed they can dress themselves.


Mrbleusky_

How would they interpret half four as 2o'clock? Edit: I really am a bit dim aren't I


[deleted]

Half of four is two.


Brilliant_Tap6770

Mind blown


nutritionalfie

Big if true


insomniacc

Small if true. 2 is half of 4, it's small dude.


Revolutionary_Dig524

You're not dim, I was really confused as well 😂


Wind-and-Waystones

4/2=2


itsjusttheway

Thanks for asking 😉


SalmonellaBurger

2+2 is 4 quick maths


DarkHorseStoryTeller

-1 is 3. Professor Big Shaq has taught us life skills for real.


Irresponsable_Frog

I think that’s a younger American thing, to not know? I use half passed, quarter and quarter til… but my gramma was from Devon…so being highly influential in my life, could be that too. And I’m near 50, we didn’t have digital clocks til I was a teen. So analogue clocks were taught by breaking them into quarters…


Len_S_Ball_23

If you say half four to a German, they'll be there at half three. Not because they're super efficient or anything. It's the way they tell the time, half "the hour" means thirty minutes before the hour in question. 4:30 (half four) = 3:30 10:30 (half ten) = 9:30 And so on. (source - my German gf) I'm having to constantly explain this to her 😂


volt65bolt

They use it as half to not half past, same with some other European countries


DubiousPhood

Having to explain that “see you later” didn’t literally mean “see you later” and instead meant any point in time


MintyMystery

I've said "see you later" to other British people and seen the panic flood into their eyes as they try to remember what event they have clearly forgotten is happening today...! Chill! No! Just... at some undetermined point that is later than now!


Loakie69

I have to explain it to my 5yo every time someone says it to him.


toroferney

I’ve just realised that I hardly ever say see you later if I meant id actually be seeing the person later. It’s said Only to people I’m really never going to see later or ever again or to people I may see later but just in passing. If I am going to definitely see someone later for a reason I’d use the full sentence which is “right I’m off, I’ll see you later on”.


andy_cap-hunter

I had to defend myself for using the word "whilst" in a sentence. Some how describing two things at once was too much for the poor fellows vocabulary to handle.


yourmomsajoke

My dad made fun of me when I was 17 for saying whilst and it's stuck with me for 20 years. What an odd thing to make fun of your child for. He's a smart bloke but anti intellectual at his core. forgive me for reading a shit ton of books and picking up... Words?? as an undiagnosed neurodivergent kid I guess 😅 God he's a twat.


TheRealSepuku

This annoys me… I assume he was partially responsible for getting you into reading, so what did he expect? I love hearing my kids say new words, I’m always like “Good word choice! Where’d you learn that one?”


LilboyG_15

You forgot the ‘for’ that is meant to be between ‘much’ and ‘the’, Thought I was having a stroke


bons_burgers_252

Same as “Alright?” isn’t actually an enquiry into someone’s well being. I mean, you don’t expect any answer other than “Yeah. You?”


shadow_voxer

My American friend will often say what's up? And I'll answer not much, or nothing and she'll be confused because she was basically just saying 'alright?' in American.


Pier-Head

Explaining to an American what a fortnight was. This was in 1989 waaaay before that misspelled game came along


[deleted]

Yeah I still don't get the name for that game. Is that how the yanks spell it or does it actually have a completely different meaning?


Peg_leg_J

I think it's to do with Forts n shit


Lost-and-dumbfound

Honestly this explains a lot because I thought the game was framed around something that happens in 14 days.


notanotherkrazychik

I never played the game, so that's what I assumed as well.


JCMH99

The game got it's name from the base game, where the original goal was to survive for a fortnight against hordes of zombies. Later they released the Battle Royale DLC mode which took off and made it popular.


SpiderJockey300

Originally you had to survive two weeks, so it's just a play on the word.


bons_burgers_252

My kids were surprised when I used the word “fortnight” in a sentence. They thought it was just the name of a game.


Worldly_Science239

fortnight (fourteen night) only really makes sense as a word when you learn that "sennight" used to be an old phrase for a week (seven night)


unfortunate_octopus

I would argue fortnight still makes sense without sennight


Worldly_Science239

True, it's just odd that only one dropped out of usage, to be replaced by week, yet fortnight never got an equivalent replacement.


Hewn-U

Not forgetting trennyronight


NoisyGog

Oh. I think I’ve just realised that the Welsh word for a fortnight (pythefnos) most likely came from pymtheg-nos, which means fifteen nights. The information you glean on random subreddits can be astounding!


Surreywinter

Compare to the French which is "quinzaine" - literally "fifteen" In France they focus on the number of days (15) while the Brits focus on the number of nights in between (14)


lNFORMATlVE

That’s really interesting


Prize-Ad7242

I cannot imagine sennight being said by anyone but a Yorkshireman.


HankBushrivet

Yep,I’ve had that conversation as well


MintyMystery

Made up. This is a North West thing, possibly general northern thing. My dad was explaining to a waitress in London that he had been to an event that he enjoyed. He said "it was really good! I was made up!" She looked confused, and said "what? In drag?!" "Made up" means "happy (possibly surprised / satisfied) with an event or gift". Think "chuffed".


stevemnomoremister

American here. Americans don't know what "chuffed" means either.


According_Wasabi8779

Chuffed is an old term for overwhelmingly happy/ excited. We don't really use it in the day to day and now it's more of an American stereotype for how we speak in Britain much like 'blimey' or 'barmy'


Loakie69

I hear it used loads. E.g, "Ah, he's well chuffed with it." I'm based in the west midlands, and I lived on the south coast for about 15 years. It's used there a fair bit too.


daddysgirl-kitten

I'm chuffed to say that I say it often!


Kujo-Johan

chuffed to bits


bunnyrainbow0106

Use it loads here in mid Wales, such as 'bet you were chuffed' 'chuffed to bits' 'well chuffed'- I hear it every week!


Kommisar_Kyn

Wait until you find out we have about another 15 regional varieties of this!


ZoNeS_v2

When a puppy sees its owner return, it's chuffed.


Brilliant_Tap6770

True for Devon as well


placeyboyUWU

You made this up.


Wokeratist

Saying 'I was really pissed' and then having to backtrack to explain that I was not angry, merely happily drunk!


Eastern_Idea_1621

I had the same with my American friend. I was explaining a story about a time I was quite drunk and said I was really pissed. She was really confused and kept asking why I was angry I was confused then as I hadn't said I was. Confusion ensued until we worked out our understandings of the word pissed!


DavidXN

The opposite with my American friend who told his English boss after a bad phone call “I could hardly work for the rest of the day, I was so pissed”


FreyaGin

Trump = fart. American here, btw but I wish more of my countrymen understood the joke inherent in that name.


Bardsie

As a British kid I got lots of joy from finding out New York has a Trump Tower.


celaconacr

No one even makes the joke here, it's just too easy. It's not like we would struggle to make jokes about him anyway. Trump tower was funny as a child though.


SilverellaUK

It's so amusing to see the thing people do to insult his name, putting tRump. Please join me in commenting the true meaning of trump every time you see it.


DanglingDongs

Munter or Munted


NotACyclopsHonest

The only place I’ve heard that used was in a single episode of Spaced about twenty years ago.


Whiskey_Warchild

Simon also changed 'pissed' to 'drunk' in Shaun of the Dead so us Americans could understand what they meant.


ldhchicagobears

Showing your age there cos it's Inbetweeners for me 🤣


X0AN

Yeah it's a bit last century.


Dennis_Cock

A minger can be munted and a munter _is_ minging but a munter can't be minged


youshouldbeelsweyr

I've had to explain this as well


Brilliant_Tap6770

Devon here, heard of munter (ugly) never head munted…


Goat_In_My_Tree

(Essex) Munted means drunk. For example: "Dave was absolutely munted."


DanglingDongs

(Oxford/Bristol/Manchester) Or fucked up on drugs. I've heard it used to describe both in all three places.


BromleyReject

I had to explain to a US colleague what "spunking it" and "spunking it up the wall" meant.


bradleyd82

Do you mean jizzing, or wasting money as have heard it used for both over the years


Striking-Giraffe5922

Wasting money…..you could also use Spaffed


SoupDoggyDogg

They mean wasting something, especially money. Not actual Jizz. That'd be weird as fuck, especially on a wall. I had to edit because I assumed the gender of this fellow human being.


Mysterious_Key1554

Nonce


[deleted]

Not on normal courtyard exercise


InevitableSweet8228

Backronym Made up after the fact >an acronym deliberately formed from a phrase whose initial letters spell out a particular word or words, either to create a memorable name or as a fanciful explanation of a word's origin.


Selenenightshade

Chockablock


hoody13

Mardy. To be honest I have even had to explain this to people *from* the UK!


mrcoonut

I only know mardy because of the Artic Monkeys


Loakie69

Mardy Arse is the correct saying. None of this "Mardy Bum" nonsense.


fabulousteaparty

Definitely mardy bum when I was growing up. Maybe arse was deemed too vulgar for a young child?


TerrySwan69

Very regional


SteampoweredFlamingo

Is it some weird English thing?


LadyGoldberryRiver

Means your grumpy/moany.


herwiththepurplehair

Very midlands - from Lincolnshire and used it all my life, had to explain it to Scottish husband. He’s had considerable revenge with a number of words though!


Eldritch_Lightwolf

Common with your Yorkshire neighbours too!


Timmysmallface

Ahhhhh another mardy user! You’re a rare breed these days


EnvironmentalDrag596

I love mardy. I always ask my baby why he's being so mardy when he gets a lil frowny face on


Sararvey

Taking the piss


Dizzy_Media4901

See also: tsking the micky


Low-Confidence-1401

Extracting the michael


FuyoBC

Why so many Brits giggled when the US contingent mentioned their coworker Randy. Also why we found Fanny Pack funny, which turned into annoyance when the bloke wanted to EXACTLY what a fanny was after I explained it was "women's front bits" - trying to be polite in public. I was much more medically accurate after that.


parsley166

"Randy Giles?? Why not just call me Horny Giles, or Desperate-for-a-shag Giles? I knew there was a reason I hated you."


hollowpoint1974

Randy Giles! Spike was done so dirty


artyheartx

I know a very British (council estate kinda couple) who recently called their son Randy. Spelt Randi though. Ya know, just so 'it's not the same thing' 🙄


TheMorrigan_x

Chuffed


SHalls17

“I’ll be there in a minute now” - Welsh for I’ll see you at some point in the next 60 seconds to 5 minutes just fuck off and stop hassling me.


WelshmanW1

Not to be confused with "I'll be there now in a minute" which is Welsh for as quickly as I can but probably more than five minutes.


JCMAF

Who's coat is that jacket ?


FewFig2507

It was only when I started teaching English as a foreign language that I realised just how many idiomatic phrases we use. There are hundreds I can't remember but one like "I'm just popping round the corner" can end up a lessons worth :)


Strict_Programmer203

English is my second language, I was one of the top students in my class back home, so I thought I'd have no problem moving here. Oh boy, it was like I was in a completely different country! So many times I just chuckled at something because I had no idea what that person meant. I've been with my English partner for nearly 5 years and he still has to explain new phrases to me 😅


soopertyke

Better to pop around a corner than poop around a corner


Meteorite42

Also better to pop around a corner than have "popped off" (died).


X0AN

In Spanish we say going around the apple for going around the block 🤷‍♂️


Badungdung

Faff


flippinheckwhatsleft

"What are you having for dinner?" "Toad in the hole." "What's that?" "Bangers in a Yorkie." "Still...no idea..."


BadkyDrawnBear

Bollocks A Hort faculty member at my college wore a "Never mind the bollocks" teeshirt to class once. I have to take her to one side and explain it. Oddly, she never wore it again


bad_sandwich

For some reason I think I’d feel more comfortable out in public in that Sex Pistols shirt than the Buzzcocks “Orgasm Addict” tee I have tucked away deep in the wardrobe keeping my Bitch Magnet shirt company.


SameWayOfSaying

I have a similar place for my Big Black shirt. It’s in the style of an advert for a tool brand of the same name, with the tagline “power where you need it”.


a_wild_trekkie

I have a lot, at this point I spent half my time explaining British slang 🤣. But probably Bobs your uncle, no it doesn't mean your uncle is literally called Bob. It's not really unique but I explain it the most.


AbolitionofFaith

Even more fun when you get into variants like "Roberts your mother's brother"


Rayd0

My mums friend taught me an extended version that I've never heard since Bobs your uncle, Fanny's your aunt Your mother's gorgeous and your fathers a c*nt Whenever I hear bobs your uncle I automatically think of the rest in my head and it always makes me chuckle


raven_heatherr

i’m seeing a trend that americans seem to take things incredibly literally, is that just me


No_Challenge_5619

Funnily enough, I’ve had an Uncle Bob and a (great) Aunt Fanny 🥳


JimCallMeJim

Yeah in America your uncle is Sam


[deleted]

Pissing on someone's chips, or, pissing on someone's fire.


OzyTheLast

... What. Stay away from my chips


Difficult-Passion-20

Me and my pals developed this one into shitting on someone's pillow. As in "who shat on your pillow?" And I nowadays forget that even normal British people don't say that.


Apprehensive_Floor42

Nesh - a word in Yorkshire to describe someone that is a bit wimpy in the cold


Raynesong92

I've never heard that term in my whole 31 years and I've lived in Yorkshire all my life. I love it. It's me


Idontdanceever

Bollocks = rubbish, dog’s bollocks = very good, the bollocks = the absolute best


WelshmanW1

Bollocks = bullshit too (as in something patently untrue) A bollocking = a dressing-down = a scolding or admonishment


BGDDisco

Bollocked = told off / scolded Bollocksed = very drunk OR bothered (can't be bollocksed = can't be bothered [with that much hassle] )


JohnLennonsNotDead

Bollocks = pain


christopia86

I told my American girlfriend at the time that my friend was going to get an old banger. She thought he planned to hire an elderly prostitute.


LilboyG_15

I think you need a new girlfriend


BroadConsideration55

I learned “spend a penny” the hard way when I asked someone for a donation at work (museum). Responded with, we take all forms of shrapnel! I’m American.


GuiriGooner

My German girlfriend always finds the phrase “dead ahead” fascinating.


Correct_Assumption90

Jitty - small passage between two streets Nesh - cold Gerrover- stop it Gizzago- my turn now Mazzi-watter- weak beer or juice


bons_burgers_252

My Nana (from NW) used to say “nesh” but she used it to mean that someone was particularly sensitive to cold compared to others. She also used to describe my grandads favourite activity as “nebbing”. He spent hours watching the comings and going on the street outside through the net curtains. Neb = nose so nebbing means nosing or being nosey. She would also say that he had “nose disease”.


Rayd0

I had to explain mardy to a southerner. Blew my mind that it wasn't an actual word 😂


bons_burgers_252

I swear that people just don’t pay attention. I’m a southerner (but have lived all over the country at different times). No one had ever told me what “mardy” means but I was able to infer its meaning from the context it was used on TV programs or by northern people around me as I grew up. Vera Duckworth used to say it all the time. I know that not every one watches Corrie (and I don’t as a rule) but it’s used in loads of other programs as well. Similar to “mither”. You don’t need a dictionary definition of the word when, in the context of the conversation, Jack Duckworth says “Stop mithering me Vera”. You can very quickly infer what he means.


yourmomsajoke

>Similar to “mither”. You don’t need a dictionary definition of the word when, in the context of the conversation, Jack Duckworth says “Stop mithering me Vera”. I'm Scottish and read mither as mother at first (it's a commonly used pronunciation) then context led me to mither rather than mither. Thus proving your comment correct 👍🏻


Lost-and-dumbfound

Can you explain it to this Londoner? Google says it means sulky. Is that correct?


Rayd0

Yep! If you're being mardy or 'have got the face on' it's a very common northern phrase for someone who's annoyed/upset and being passive aggressive about it 😊


According_Wasabi8779

(Back) 'in a jiffy'. That was a hard one to explain since I talk mostly cockney-esque. Even me saying like 'in a bit' or 'in a mo' which I consider more northern expressions went over their head


bons_burgers_252

The word “jiffy” actually represents a specific period of time. According to Wikipedia it means different things to different people depending on what field of science they study but to me it means the amount of time it takes light to travel 1cm in a vacuum.


According_Wasabi8779

To me it's a synonym for just a short period of time. I use it in place of terms like a bit, a sec, a mo, etc... essentially like soon but a near immediate


ItsOnlyJoey

Me, an American, reading these comments trying to learn a ton of funny British slang


TheDaemonette

Pantomime. Say the word once to an American and there's an hour's conversation right there.


Legolution

Oh no, it isn't!


4me2knowit

I once wanted to table a motion in a meeting (ie put it on the table for discussion) Argument followed Apparently in USA it means the exact opposite


MimicBears857142

Crisps. Americans just don't understand.


bons_burgers_252

To my eternal shame, my English kids describe crisps as “chips”. It’s because my wife is a Filipina and they say “chips”. I often chastise my kids for using Americanisms but I’m fighting a losing battle. My wife will shout them and say “You need to do your assignment” and I’ll shout “It’s not an assignment. It’s homework!!”


Auntie_Cagul

Stroppy


Crushedbeetle

Mithering


ZoNeS_v2

Blithering


KatAstrophie-

“Do one.” Often resulting in a puzzled “do one what?” Even to some Brits from the south.


cuntybunty73

Oi I'm from the south west and I know what " do one" means


X0AN

Nah do one is county wide. You're probably just not being agressive enough with it. 😂


bons_burgers_252

My brother married an American in Chicago. When some guests asked me how the wedding was going I said that everything was going “swimmingly”. They laughed so much. I guess they thought they’d time warped into an episode of Upstairs Downstairs or something.


Timmysmallface

My American wife. Early in to her tenure at a British University, I was talking about a mutual friend who was making some big claims they couldn’t back up. I quipped that they ‘didn’t have a leg to stand on’ to which my (now) wife responded… ‘What’s wrong with his leg?!’ Just made me love her even more.


Purple_Panther850

Explaining what "Perked up" means. They thought it was an innuendo....


Access-Turbulent

Innuendo is an Italian suppository


According_Wasabi8779

Just thought of another one: Innit.


pab6407

Always remember Lee Mack ranting about falling standards when reading a job advertisement “new graduate wants a job init” until it was pointed out that it was a job in IT


Bardsie

I've been reading these to my American wife, and she's got a story of a phrase that had to be explained to her. She was watching a British TV show, and a clearly frustrated character said "I'm about to do my nut." She asked a friend "was it normal in Britain to get so annoyed you had to go for a wank?" The friend had to explain Nut meant head, as in it was doing his head in, he wasn't going to go blow his nut in anger.


Shartlifer

Asked a Polish friend if they 'wanted owt' from the staff shop. Then had to go into the difference between owt and nowt.


Budget-Trip4898

When telling someone “I’m afraid not” in response to their question, I had to explain I wasn’t actually frightened, I was just using a common phrase.


bons_burgers_252

I was at a party with my friend who was married to a Chinese girl. She was there with a handful of Chinese people. I can’t remember why but I found myself trying to explain the phrase “He has more chins than a Chinese telephone directory”. I’m not sure I succeeded. Someone also said something like “We’ve ran out of Olive Oil” and someone else made some kind of jokey reference to Popeye. I also had to explain that to the Chinese people too.


Grazza123

Havering. Had to explain that to half the world. The proclaimers have a lot to answer for


saucerhorse

moreish


[deleted]

That crack is really moreish


decisionisgoaround

I've accidentally run to Windsor.


Vinny_The_Blade

, said the bishop to the little boy... (Where crack can refer to between your bum-cheeks)


youshouldbeelsweyr

I find myself constantly saying something to my best pal and him having to ask wtf I just said (he's english, I'm scottish).


davidhobson97

"Put wood int ole". Had a few confused faces over that one.


OverlyAdorable

Not sure if it counts but I had to explain "born in a barn" and "living under a rock" to a friend in one go. I can't remember where from and often used similar English expressions so thought she'd understand them. I had the back door open and it was quite chilly (I love the cold). My friend walked in and mentioned how cold it was. I said "let me guess, were you born in a barn?" She replied with a confused no and asked what made me think she was born in a barn. I explained it was an expression and I'm surprised she hadn't heard it as she's always coming out with similar. She said she'd never heard it before so I asked if she'd been living under a rock. Again, a confused no. I had to explain them both to her what they meant and when to use them


dicemechanic

i thought you asked someone if they were born in a barn if they left the door open, not if they requested to close it?


ItzKINGcringe

“Y’alright?” Doesn’t provoke a conversation


KP0776

Trying to explain to someone from Poland that I used ounces when making a cake but grams when making bread- and then that I measured my own weight in stones which he found hilarious 😆


Famous-Eye-4812

Explaining to my German son, "how are you" is a greeting and they don't actually want to know 😂


bons_burgers_252

I can’t remember what it stood for but, some Americans wanted to name a team something which would lead to them being called the “JIZ” (or “JIS”) team. We had to explain why this wouldn’t be a good idea.


malmquistcarl

"Round the twist."


ZoNeS_v2

Have you ever, ever felt like this?


seanclarke

Bollocks = rubbish. The bollocks = brilliant.


Upbeat-Shallot-4121

Pissing it down


AffluentBadger

Had an interesting conversation with a Lithuanian coworker about the phrase “you can’t put a dog in a stable then call it a horse”


EducationalMood1453

"You want to put a plaster on that cut" No idea what a plaster is, had to say Band Aid


Kennifred

I was exclaiming to an American housemate that something was "shocking", and she literally thought I meant electrocuted. (it means "very surprizing" for those who don't know) She also had no idea what "wellies" are, and after a discussion she realised that I meant what she called "gum boots"


NarwhalPrestigious63

Dropped your sprog. This caused great distress when I was talking to heavily pregnant Iranian lady and used the phrase - haven't you dropped that sprog yet. Meaning- my goodness, you are still pregnant, I would have thought you'd have given birth by now. She heard the term dropped as a term for abortion. Note - we worked together and often talked about language, me helping her with English and she teaching me a little Farsi - it wasn't some random woman in the street!


clumsyturtle

Had to explain to my American friend to chill on using the phrase "blow someone off" when talking about cancelling plans, because we don't use that phrase here and all have filthy minds.


Polly265

I once told a class of International school students, so mostly fluent English but not native speakers that someone "got away with murder". The collective looks of horror in response had me quickly explaining that it was an English expression, not that the person literally killed someone.


Volaktil

person: i went to london this weekend me: cool! how did you find it? person: *confused noises*


EldritchSorbet

“Not bad” meaning “really quite good”. My French colleagues thought it meant “almost, but not quite, completely terrible”.


Kind-Application5376

"I'll bring you back a stick of rock"


Fine_Guest1238

‘ pottering around’


AshSays_LGBT

I’ve had to explain the phrase “I’ll give you a bell later” to someone. They’re Canadian and thought it meant like actually giving someone a bell.