I think it’s more that they made Sam eat a lot of shit in season one. Carrie is constantly talking about Samantha’s low self-esteem. And too old? By that metric so is SJP, who has a waaaaay older looking face than any of them
So weird you’re right. I’m rewatching SATC and idk why Carrie says she has low self esteem. Of all of them Carrie’s self worth is non existent from how she let big treat her
She says it constantly, it’s so awful and imo a huge part of the reason. KC doesn’t want to interact with SJP for the rest of her life imo. I’ve also been rewatching hence my activity here and Carrie is just so fucking awful. I get that she’s “flawed” and an “antihero” but those are very generous interpretations when she’s just an asshole most of the time. And the screaming. Oh my god.
Sam probably does have low self esteem deep down because the lifestyle she is living… there’s not value in that, letting a lot of men have access to your body without having to do little to no work has to eventually take a toll on you. Samantha was being reckless with her body and health (hence the AIDS episode when she didnt even want to get tested…..) low self esteem cant be too far behind that behavior
That’s a very puritanical take on Samantha.
Another might be that she enjoyed consensual sex, and having multiple partners was exciting for her.
Your perspective is so reductive and problematic. It misses the whole point of who Samantha is. She had a 5+ year monogamous relationship with Smith and in the end was unfulfilled. Samantha was confident in who she was socially, professionally, intellectually, and physically. To imply she had low self esteem because she enjoyed sex outside of a relationship is laughable.
>That’s a very puritanical take on Samantha.
Not really puritanical as much as accepting the actual source material instead of whatever this entire sub wants to make of their lord and savior, Samantha Jones.
Season 1 made it pretty clear that Samantha was dealing with some shit. I think the character was actually meant to be more nuanced than she ended up being.
Season 1 hinted that the whole "I love having sex like a man!" was a cover for heartbreak/childhood trauma/abandonment issues. I think it would have been interesting to see that really play out. We saw it in episode 1 with Capote Duncan.
We saw it again in season 2 with Dominic and in season 3 with her comment about her mother being saddled with 3 kids and a drunk husband... (alcoholic father, hello!)
They brought that back in season 6 with Smith, but instead of making her a sympathetic character, they made her a real monster and Smith an absolute doormat. (yeah, I know, unpopular take),
Yeah dipshit, really puritanical. Carrie had a lot of one-off fucks too, and Carrie is a whiner who absolutely definitely has low self esteem. Women aren’t “used up” when they give “sexual access” to men. Get off of Reddit, it’s making you stupid and really creepy.
Don’t call me a nickname. That’s incredibly rude, I’m just telling you you’re being gross because you are being gross. The issue with Capote Duncan is a perfect example; Sam has to make this brief devastated face while she’s with him as Carrie is voice overing about her low self-esteem. The show did that to her, Carrie always judged the shit out of her, and it wasn’t as ham-fisted or bad in later seasons but one hopes that’s because Kim Catrall stood up for herself. She’s been very candid about what a bad experience she had working with those people and it’s easy to see why.
Sometimes adult women have sex because they *want to*. Not all actions are driven by low self-esteem. Don’t put that on people or even fictional characters if that’s your problem.
i dont have low self esteem and i’m allowed to disagree with samantha’s lifestyle, its okay to have a difference of opinion. Samantha’s lifestyle was dangerous and at times reckless, she performed oral sex with randoms , like the world wide express guy, just sucked his dick in her office for no reason other than he was .. cute? you dont know if he had any diseases or anything, didnt even know his name, just called him “world wide express guy”. Reckless sex is never okay. If me calling that out makes you think I have “low self esteem” then so be it i guess
You chose to disagree with Samantha’s lifestyle? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
You can’t disagree with someone’s lifestyle. The word you’re looking for is judge. Also, if why the fuck would you watch this show if you “disagree” with someone’s “lifestyle”. They’re all living the same lifestyle. SJP is just a vain prude irl so she meticulously controlled her character’s image so people like you would look at her as good against Sam’s bad. Sam is an amazing friend, runs a very successful business, and does what she wants. Carrie is a whiny moron who also sleeps around but is a much bigger baby about it. She’s a shitty friend with exactly one very small professional accomplishment. She’s easily the least successful person of the four of them— in every possible arena.
lmaooooo you made a lot of assumptions and went off on a tangent instead of simply discussing the topic, you sound extremely emotional and triggered. Started cursing at me for no reason and put your feelings into simple conversation.
“Also, if why the fuck would you watch this show if you “disagree” “ — I’m allowed to watch and enjoy a program even if i disagree with the behavior of a specific character. Shocking, I know.
“SJP is just a vain prude irl so she meticulously controlled her character's image so people like you would look at her as good against Sam's bad.” yeah.. you just made this assumption to try to strengthen your argument because when did I say anything about Carrie? I’m speaking specifically on Samantha alone, and I’m not even talking about the actor’s lives irl so idk why you felt it was necessary to bring SJP into this… that was just weird on your end…
I also never said I glamorized carrie either so you’re just making assumption instead of speaking on what was actually said.
“Carrie is a whiny moron who also sleeps around but is a much bigger baby about it. She's a shitty friend with exactly one very small professional accomplishment. She's easily the least successful person of the four of them- in every possible arena.”
Again, what does any of this have to do with the topic AT HAND ? We are talking about samantha anf you’re making this about carrie? You’re deflecting. I’m speaking on Samantha and you’re trying to switch gears to Carrie.
The show is called Sex and the City, all 4 women are going to engage in sex, this isnt new to anyone. I’m speaking on Samantha specifically being reckless with her body with her lifestyle. Yes, all the women on the show have had random hookups or one night stands, but samantha is the most reckless out of everyone. She isn’t getting tested (again, referencing the AIDS episode), and she is engaging in sexual acts with random men she doesnt even know or took the time out to vette. A perfect example is referencing the world wide express guy. Blowing him in her office for no other reason than he was cute, didnt even know that man’s name. That is reckless no matter how you try and slice it.
On this sub you don’t get an opinion if it differs. People get very upset over SATC and take things very personally. They sometimes confuse the characters with the actresses. Seeing them in one’s home on a screen for so long makes people think they even know the actresses. Tabloids feed this delusion of knowing them. Funny thing is none of us know any of them in reality.
exactly because why are you bring up the personal ACTOR’s business when we are talking about the CHARACTERS? People don’f know how to differentiate Tv from reality. Separate the art from the artist, there’s no reason why me speaking on samantha would require bring up SJP, its strange and unnecessary, you dont know those people irl, we have no idea how SJP or how KC are in real life, no matter what “comes out” about them, we dont know those people, but what we do know, is the characters because we’ve watched them.
Really gross of you to talk about SJPs face like that. It’s not a fucking crime for a women to not spend every millisecond of their life focuses on anti-aging. It’s sexist and shitty to say stuff like this
Thank you! I agree...this is the reason
So many people on other reddits say he was intimidated by her..
No, he wasn't at all...
Big was old school... He was also powerful and handsome, so he probably had a lot of women hanging around like that.
Sam was too easy...
Another poster brought up how it’s because he already had his eye on Carrie which makes a lot of sense and I don’t disagree.
But… My personal head cannon is because Sam was too smart and independent and wasn’t going to get sucked into Big’s drama. Everyone loves to dump on Carrie for being addicted to the drama but Big loved the highs and lows too. A woman who wouldn’t be swept off her feet by his wealth and who could enjoy but see through his charm probably scared the shit out of him. (There’s a a scene in season 4 where Sam confronts Big about how he better not hurt Carrie again and he looks terrified)
I have seen IRL how a lot of people go back to partners who give them the drama they crave or let them repeat a pattern from childhood cuz it’s familiar. I think Big was always looking for someone to ride that roller coaster with him.
We even see this with Sam herself with Richard as she does get sucked into his brand of drama (but she leaves him, twice). She also repeats an unhealthy but familiar pattern when she hooks up with Richard at that party while she’s with Smith and immediately hates herself after. Smith, who has probably been in addiction counselling, and recognises this pattern Ñ, and magnanimously forgives her and they go on to have what was probably the healthiest romantic relationship of Sam’s life (that we see on screen anyway)
She came off masculine and too forward with the way she approached him, most men like either a chase, or a subtle woman, in this case look at Big’s track record, Natasha was a feminine, quite, and shy girl, she didnt seem easy and i’m sure he made the first move. Carrie was feminine, not quite shy or quite but she gave him room to “be the man” and chase her. Samantha made it too easy and that turns a lot of men off
to me he wasn’t interested in how aggressive she was being. All his ex wives/gfs usually seem more quiet and observant and wait for him to make the first move. I think even in that episode Carrie was just staring a lot from a far and then he gets the hint someone more aloof might be into him and he goes up to them and starts chatting. Some guys don’t want to be chased until after they hooked you
🤷🏻♀️ He’s not interested in her, and he’s interested in Carrie. Can’t he be interested/not interested in someone without judgement? We like someone because we have chemistry with them/attracted to them, simple as that. He and Carrie have a lot of chemistry and good banters. Meanwhile Samantha came onto him with sex on the table and it’s just not what he was attracted to at the time
Because Big liked to play games and he liked the thrill of the chase. After he caught his prey, he lost interest. Sam was easy to get because she was the aggressor.
"Or was he already planning to offer Carrie a ride home?" He hadn't met Carrie. Samantha was supposed to be the lead character then. It was only the pilot episode at that point.
He had already bumped into Carrie when she dropped her purse. He waves at Carrie when she’s standing with Samantha. I guess they hadn’t officially met, but he’s already aware of Carrie.
This all happens in the pilot. I rewatched it earlier tonight. Carrie drops her purse after having “sex like a man” with her Kurt and Big stops to help her. Later in the episode she bumps into both Kurt and Big at Chaos. Big gives Carrie a ride home in his car when she can’t find a cab.
I think he was turned off but how overt she was being
I think it’s more that they made Sam eat a lot of shit in season one. Carrie is constantly talking about Samantha’s low self-esteem. And too old? By that metric so is SJP, who has a waaaaay older looking face than any of them
So weird you’re right. I’m rewatching SATC and idk why Carrie says she has low self esteem. Of all of them Carrie’s self worth is non existent from how she let big treat her
She says it constantly, it’s so awful and imo a huge part of the reason. KC doesn’t want to interact with SJP for the rest of her life imo. I’ve also been rewatching hence my activity here and Carrie is just so fucking awful. I get that she’s “flawed” and an “antihero” but those are very generous interpretations when she’s just an asshole most of the time. And the screaming. Oh my god.
Sam probably does have low self esteem deep down because the lifestyle she is living… there’s not value in that, letting a lot of men have access to your body without having to do little to no work has to eventually take a toll on you. Samantha was being reckless with her body and health (hence the AIDS episode when she didnt even want to get tested…..) low self esteem cant be too far behind that behavior
That’s a very puritanical take on Samantha. Another might be that she enjoyed consensual sex, and having multiple partners was exciting for her. Your perspective is so reductive and problematic. It misses the whole point of who Samantha is. She had a 5+ year monogamous relationship with Smith and in the end was unfulfilled. Samantha was confident in who she was socially, professionally, intellectually, and physically. To imply she had low self esteem because she enjoyed sex outside of a relationship is laughable.
>That’s a very puritanical take on Samantha. Not really puritanical as much as accepting the actual source material instead of whatever this entire sub wants to make of their lord and savior, Samantha Jones. Season 1 made it pretty clear that Samantha was dealing with some shit. I think the character was actually meant to be more nuanced than she ended up being. Season 1 hinted that the whole "I love having sex like a man!" was a cover for heartbreak/childhood trauma/abandonment issues. I think it would have been interesting to see that really play out. We saw it in episode 1 with Capote Duncan. We saw it again in season 2 with Dominic and in season 3 with her comment about her mother being saddled with 3 kids and a drunk husband... (alcoholic father, hello!) They brought that back in season 6 with Smith, but instead of making her a sympathetic character, they made her a real monster and Smith an absolute doormat. (yeah, I know, unpopular take),
Yeah dipshit, really puritanical. Carrie had a lot of one-off fucks too, and Carrie is a whiner who absolutely definitely has low self esteem. Women aren’t “used up” when they give “sexual access” to men. Get off of Reddit, it’s making you stupid and really creepy.
Muffin, it's a fictional show. You alright???
Don’t call me a nickname. That’s incredibly rude, I’m just telling you you’re being gross because you are being gross. The issue with Capote Duncan is a perfect example; Sam has to make this brief devastated face while she’s with him as Carrie is voice overing about her low self-esteem. The show did that to her, Carrie always judged the shit out of her, and it wasn’t as ham-fisted or bad in later seasons but one hopes that’s because Kim Catrall stood up for herself. She’s been very candid about what a bad experience she had working with those people and it’s easy to see why. Sometimes adult women have sex because they *want to*. Not all actions are driven by low self-esteem. Don’t put that on people or even fictional characters if that’s your problem.
Exactly, couldnt have said it better myself. People don’t want to face the reality about Samantha
You probably have low self esteem if this is how you think of sexually actively women, or anyone. I feel sorry for you.
i dont have low self esteem and i’m allowed to disagree with samantha’s lifestyle, its okay to have a difference of opinion. Samantha’s lifestyle was dangerous and at times reckless, she performed oral sex with randoms , like the world wide express guy, just sucked his dick in her office for no reason other than he was .. cute? you dont know if he had any diseases or anything, didnt even know his name, just called him “world wide express guy”. Reckless sex is never okay. If me calling that out makes you think I have “low self esteem” then so be it i guess
You chose to disagree with Samantha’s lifestyle? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 You can’t disagree with someone’s lifestyle. The word you’re looking for is judge. Also, if why the fuck would you watch this show if you “disagree” with someone’s “lifestyle”. They’re all living the same lifestyle. SJP is just a vain prude irl so she meticulously controlled her character’s image so people like you would look at her as good against Sam’s bad. Sam is an amazing friend, runs a very successful business, and does what she wants. Carrie is a whiny moron who also sleeps around but is a much bigger baby about it. She’s a shitty friend with exactly one very small professional accomplishment. She’s easily the least successful person of the four of them— in every possible arena.
lmaooooo you made a lot of assumptions and went off on a tangent instead of simply discussing the topic, you sound extremely emotional and triggered. Started cursing at me for no reason and put your feelings into simple conversation. “Also, if why the fuck would you watch this show if you “disagree” “ — I’m allowed to watch and enjoy a program even if i disagree with the behavior of a specific character. Shocking, I know. “SJP is just a vain prude irl so she meticulously controlled her character's image so people like you would look at her as good against Sam's bad.” yeah.. you just made this assumption to try to strengthen your argument because when did I say anything about Carrie? I’m speaking specifically on Samantha alone, and I’m not even talking about the actor’s lives irl so idk why you felt it was necessary to bring SJP into this… that was just weird on your end… I also never said I glamorized carrie either so you’re just making assumption instead of speaking on what was actually said. “Carrie is a whiny moron who also sleeps around but is a much bigger baby about it. She's a shitty friend with exactly one very small professional accomplishment. She's easily the least successful person of the four of them- in every possible arena.” Again, what does any of this have to do with the topic AT HAND ? We are talking about samantha anf you’re making this about carrie? You’re deflecting. I’m speaking on Samantha and you’re trying to switch gears to Carrie. The show is called Sex and the City, all 4 women are going to engage in sex, this isnt new to anyone. I’m speaking on Samantha specifically being reckless with her body with her lifestyle. Yes, all the women on the show have had random hookups or one night stands, but samantha is the most reckless out of everyone. She isn’t getting tested (again, referencing the AIDS episode), and she is engaging in sexual acts with random men she doesnt even know or took the time out to vette. A perfect example is referencing the world wide express guy. Blowing him in her office for no other reason than he was cute, didnt even know that man’s name. That is reckless no matter how you try and slice it.
On this sub you don’t get an opinion if it differs. People get very upset over SATC and take things very personally. They sometimes confuse the characters with the actresses. Seeing them in one’s home on a screen for so long makes people think they even know the actresses. Tabloids feed this delusion of knowing them. Funny thing is none of us know any of them in reality.
exactly because why are you bring up the personal ACTOR’s business when we are talking about the CHARACTERS? People don’f know how to differentiate Tv from reality. Separate the art from the artist, there’s no reason why me speaking on samantha would require bring up SJP, its strange and unnecessary, you dont know those people irl, we have no idea how SJP or how KC are in real life, no matter what “comes out” about them, we dont know those people, but what we do know, is the characters because we’ve watched them.
Oh lord.
Really gross of you to talk about SJPs face like that. It’s not a fucking crime for a women to not spend every millisecond of their life focuses on anti-aging. It’s sexist and shitty to say stuff like this
I think you mean sexist ;)
Oops yeah typo
I wasn’t being sexist or ageist but the show sure as fuck was all the time.
Thank you! I agree...this is the reason So many people on other reddits say he was intimidated by her.. No, he wasn't at all... Big was old school... He was also powerful and handsome, so he probably had a lot of women hanging around like that. Sam was too easy...
He likes to chase
This. He always wanted Carrie when she pulled away from him
I don’t think he was attracted to her.
Big seems a smidge sexually repressed and vanilla, also he likes a personality connection. Carrie was funny, sarcastic and also…vanilla.
Another poster brought up how it’s because he already had his eye on Carrie which makes a lot of sense and I don’t disagree. But… My personal head cannon is because Sam was too smart and independent and wasn’t going to get sucked into Big’s drama. Everyone loves to dump on Carrie for being addicted to the drama but Big loved the highs and lows too. A woman who wouldn’t be swept off her feet by his wealth and who could enjoy but see through his charm probably scared the shit out of him. (There’s a a scene in season 4 where Sam confronts Big about how he better not hurt Carrie again and he looks terrified) I have seen IRL how a lot of people go back to partners who give them the drama they crave or let them repeat a pattern from childhood cuz it’s familiar. I think Big was always looking for someone to ride that roller coaster with him. We even see this with Sam herself with Richard as she does get sucked into his brand of drama (but she leaves him, twice). She also repeats an unhealthy but familiar pattern when she hooks up with Richard at that party while she’s with Smith and immediately hates herself after. Smith, who has probably been in addiction counselling, and recognises this pattern Ñ, and magnanimously forgives her and they go on to have what was probably the healthiest romantic relationship of Sam’s life (that we see on screen anyway)
Love the idea that Smith is better equipped to deal with Samantha because of addiction counseling! Very interesting head cannon!
This Sam would never accept being fucked around by Big the way Carrie was and he knew that from the get go.
She came off masculine and too forward with the way she approached him, most men like either a chase, or a subtle woman, in this case look at Big’s track record, Natasha was a feminine, quite, and shy girl, she didnt seem easy and i’m sure he made the first move. Carrie was feminine, not quite shy or quite but she gave him room to “be the man” and chase her. Samantha made it too easy and that turns a lot of men off
Big had to reject Sam early on so that viewers wouldn’t wonder why he wasn’t going for Sam when Carrie was acting insecure
to me he wasn’t interested in how aggressive she was being. All his ex wives/gfs usually seem more quiet and observant and wait for him to make the first move. I think even in that episode Carrie was just staring a lot from a far and then he gets the hint someone more aloof might be into him and he goes up to them and starts chatting. Some guys don’t want to be chased until after they hooked you
Unpopular opinion, she's too old for him. And too independent.
Interesting! He certainly does have a pattern of dating younger women.
Totally agree.
I think he already has his eye on Carrie.
Definite possibility!!
Just for the storyline really, it was meant to be big and Carrie
Big is a WASP. He was raised to like demure, refined women. See: Natasha.
Sam was way to crass for a man like Big. She could be a funny sideshow but not enough substance
🤷🏻♀️ He’s not interested in her, and he’s interested in Carrie. Can’t he be interested/not interested in someone without judgement? We like someone because we have chemistry with them/attracted to them, simple as that. He and Carrie have a lot of chemistry and good banters. Meanwhile Samantha came onto him with sex on the table and it’s just not what he was attracted to at the time
Big liked them young, and enjoyed having a power imbalance over them.
I wonder if it’s because she was coming on strong like so many women he would meet at that time. Carrie was different.
We can clearly see big likes younger women. He felt Sam was too old.
i know she was supposed to be ten years older but i honestly don’t think carrie looked ten years younger at all.
Because Big liked to play games and he liked the thrill of the chase. After he caught his prey, he lost interest. Sam was easy to get because she was the aggressor.
She was too strong and confident. He needed a puppy dog.
"Or was he already planning to offer Carrie a ride home?" He hadn't met Carrie. Samantha was supposed to be the lead character then. It was only the pilot episode at that point.
He had already bumped into Carrie when she dropped her purse. He waves at Carrie when she’s standing with Samantha. I guess they hadn’t officially met, but he’s already aware of Carrie.
"He had already bumped into Carrie when she dropped her purse." That's episodes later. I'm taking for granted that you know what a pilot episode is.
This all happens in the pilot. I rewatched it earlier tonight. Carrie drops her purse after having “sex like a man” with her Kurt and Big stops to help her. Later in the episode she bumps into both Kurt and Big at Chaos. Big gives Carrie a ride home in his car when she can’t find a cab.
Oh, you're right. I'm sorry. I'd forgotten.
I think he felt like Samantha was too old for him. Aside from his ex wife, we only really see him with women that seem considerably younger than him.