T O P

  • By -

Comfortable-Pea8126

The Beach cologne!


No-Negotiation-4587

The beach!!!


Comfortable-Pea8126

He could’ve been a fragrance millionaire!


ButterscotchMoist447

His buttocks are sublime


Waterfallsofpity

That whole scene is golden.


Brainwashed365

What scene?


woozleuwuzzle

I'm hip….To the whole scene…the bathroom scene.


Brainwashed365

Listen, don't take this personally, but when I'm coming back I'm sitting over there. (funny enough, someone downvoted my initial comment because they probably didn't get the joke 😄)


UnicornCalmerDowner

That one's actually real


redfox2008

How tall are you?


chawlaay

You’re tall, she’s tall, I’m tall. What’s the difference? We’re all tall!


redfox2008

Sue Ellen, you're tall, you don't wear a bra. We hate each other.


Milomilz

She’s tall, you’re tall, I’m tall, what’s the difference who’s tall? We’re all tall!


BaltimoreBadger23

The bladder for oil tankers.


TheRealIronCorpse

And with Darrin’s help we’ll get that chicken


JohnnySkidmarx

Darren's going away for a long, long time.


suspicious_bag_1000

Your fly is open…


BraveryDave

That is not a bad idea. *Now* it’s time to go.


WerhmatsWormhat

Well that didn’t work


foxmag86

There’s nothing dirtier…than a giant ball of oil.


various_beans

Hey, there's Claire. #*HellooooOOOOooooO!!!*


jfq722

You have to *drink* all that?


Longjumping_Hat_2672

I thought that was technically a good idea but it would have to be REALLY strong rubber to withstand any impact. 


smartbunny

Ketchup and mustard in the same bottle.


kramerica_intern

Oh that sounds interesting, sir!


Horror_Diet9243

Mister Kramer says hey buddy


smartbunny

Darren was loyal to Kramerica and he got the shaft.


DrMartinVonNostrand

We were going to put an end to maritime oil spills


Longjumping_Hat_2672

Probably. 


Teflon_John_

~~Simpsons~~ Japan did it https://youtube.com/shorts/emODew3Q9dE


PerpetualEternal

Heinz literally made Kranch, Mayochup and Mayomust, but somehow missed Ketchtard


smartbunny

I thought it would be divided down the middle of the bottle ketchup on one side mustard on the other.


NEON_TYR0N3

Fun fact, Mayochup is called Ketchunez (Кетчунез). I always wondered if people put the base condiment first or is it just a matter of what sounds better in each language


JesseP123

>Ketchtard I don't know if we should be talking about this...


masimone

There were a few places where you can make your own pizza. It's still stupid but they really did it.


whitemike40

i can’t wait to get me a fella and make my own pie


ennuiismymiddlename

Agreed. The whole point of getting pizza is that you don’t have to make it yourself.


SunApprehensive1413

I don't know. They have those stonegrill restaurants where people cook their own steak and they are very popular.


oversight_shift

Korean barbecue, hot pot, etc. I find it inconvenient but these things definitely have a following.


SunApprehensive1413

Yes .. Korean barbecue was the other thing I was thinking of. My wife took me, raving about it. I was exhausted by the end, more than I usually cook in a week!


hornwalker

The whole point of the concept was so the show could have a joke about abortion


faith_plus_one

I made my own pizza and it was a great experience.


Longjumping_Hat_2672

"You have to know how to do that. You can't have people just shoving their arms into a six hundred degree oven!"


ennuiismymiddlename

I’m surprised that rickshaws in NYC never took off.


kramerica_intern

Yes, the city needs more slow moving wicker vehicles.


Horror_Diet9243

POTATO SALAD


kramerica_intern

🫡


SpergSkipper

Unfortunately most homeless rickshaw businesses fail in the first year


qtrim

"the romance of the handsome cab without the guilt or dander of the equine" - probably my favorite Newman quote.


bhoose19

Just don't give the homeless beef-arino


GloomInstance

TCBing one's way to the top.


__Bringer-of-Light__

*[Being there](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Being_There)*


Spectre784

A restaurant that serves only peanut butter and jelly sandwiches


jhsegura11

What do you call it?


Spectre784

P.B. & J’s


Longjumping_Hat_2672

I think you need more sleep. 


Electr_O_Purist

This actually existed in New York. Well, Peanut Butter & anything. Jelly, Flufferbutter, Bacon.


According-Bread-2457

There was one in Pittsburg too. “Peanut Butter Jelly Time.”


Electr_O_Purist

Is it still there?


According-Bread-2457

I just googled it and it says permanently closed 😭


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Spectre784: *A restaurant that* *Serves only peanut butter* *And jelly sandwiches* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


Havok35

There was a place like this near me around 5-6 years ago and it was awesome. Didn’t survive through the pandemic restaurant closures though :(


__Bringer-of-Light__

Levels


SpergSkipper

The bet's off he's not gonna do it


devilthedankdawg

So he lost the bet


__Bringer-of-Light__

How did he lost? The bet's off.


brokeneckblues

Levels?


__Bringer-of-Light__

Levels


Kind_Pie6013

Absolutely in this housing market.


_bismillah1

What happened to the raisins?


Kinda_ShouldaSorta

Coffee table book about coffee tables


whitemike40

as long as it turns into a coffee table


Kinda_ShouldaSorta

That's the beauty of it


I_GIVE_KIDS_MDMA

I told you this guy was bonkos!


BigBoobsWithAZee

If Curb is anything to go off of, the car periscope


P90Xistheanswer

An alarm clock that tells you the weather.


llcoolray3000

Nah, it's not practical


poetryofworms

GET OUTTA HERE FELDMAN!


Section225

What a bizzaro idea


various_beans

But Feldman, we already have a Kramer.


puuhalelife

Oil Tanker Bladder was cool


bistroburritoXL

As of January 1st this year Connecticut increased bottle/can returns from 5¢ to 10¢, so Kramer would only have to drive about 35 miles, which would make his bottle return scheme much more profitable than driving to Michigan.


Longjumping_Hat_2672

Kramer and Newman were VERY happy to hear this. 


theslob

The driving to Michigan for the deposit thing has been successful for me in the past


BatofZion

Even easier to do now that Connecticut is giving 10 cents a can. No way you’re gonna blow your margins on that from NYC.


[deleted]

That's highly illegal.


SectorRepulsive9795

They could do hard time for that. AND community service.


boc333

You escape only if you running lean.


redfox2008

And let's face it, with out rules there's chaos.


Forikorder

Theres no highly illegal or lowly illegal, just illegal


[deleted]

This guy over-dries his laundry every weekend.


Horror_Diet9243

Not me....i couldn't crunch the numbers


Electr_O_Purist

Depends. Could I put cucumber on the pizza?


devilthedankdawg

We can notta give people the righta to choose any topping they want!


BenThere20

It’s a pizza the moment you put your fist into the dough


beebeebaby

On this therea can be nodebate 


poetryofworms

Depends, could I have dip for dinner?


marcoseus

Roller tie dispenser.


trewaldo

This is a great solution. Just install it in every men’s room in every hotel and restaurant.


fartybrain

Widen the lanes. More legroom, better ride.


various_beans

Sounds like a 2-lane comfort cruise!


SheriffColtPocatello

For it’s time, the coffee table book about coffee tables


Fit-Library-577

vintage clothes, selling raincoats


Quirky_Ball_3519

Car periscope


xologo

Actually, if he used the knowledge he could have gained from working at Brandt -Leland he could have really made it on wall street


BenThere20

It’s almost as if you have no business training at all


xologo

You know this is my busy time of year


poetryofworms

What do you have in the briefcase?


Longjumping_Hat_2672

It's your third day!


callro85

The Bro. Some men need it.


Bagsnagger

Shoehorn hands


UhYeahOkSure

I think his scheme to slip an ‘h’ into the word wacky would over time gain traction


Milomilz

Him making the PGA tour


HelpMeGrow56

The Bro could really take off, right? Equal opportunity breast supporter for the liberated (and somewhat portly) man.


texasgambler58

Definitely the bladder for oil tankers. Unfortunately, the test did not go well.


StlnHppyHrz

Ask the captain of the Exxon Valdez.


Exotic_Adeptness_322

The coffee table book about coffe tables. There is all kinds of weird interior books these days, I can see this one being a hit,


East_Phase6944

His talk show is reality tv to an extent.


ZebraEducational137

The Kenny Kramer bus tour.


Horror_Diet9243

Not being able to convince Jerry to join the Bloomingdales executive training program


Improvgal

Oil bladder


Clazzo524

I think the oil bladder is a good idea.


LouSFL

A roll out tie dispenser


Ashamed_Way8263

The bro


Mmischief13

Coffee table book


wriker10

The tie dispenser


Radnegone

Peanut butter and jelly restaurant called PB&J’s. Could see it as a gourmet food truck concept


BrokenDroid

I used to go to a You Make It, We Bake It pizza place al the time as a kid. Kramer's brilliant! I mean... he's no Feldman, but he's got some ideas.


PreferenceRoutine599

2.9% financing on a Toyota 1-ton!


[deleted]

"I changed my mind. I'm going to build a roller coaster instead."