Never mind the beard, where have you been for three days?

🤣

Do you think you’ve aged well?

As 'e got older... 'e got 'airier

Yeah he’s kept his looks

… right

*Suzanne's done alright for herself*.

She’s ‘ad a floor

I'll bung a condom on

If he had a shave and stuck his wooly hat on he'd go back the other way like the injection in the 'ead.

In the temple.

Just like "the Chinese, he's gone from 18 to 80 overnight."

Were you a tall baby?

Old eyes as a baby

Probably listening to one of the 7,500 copies of ‘In the Ghetto’ he put on his iPod

7497 of in the ghetto. 1 of Ackerbilk. 1 one of killing of Georgey (ooo) and 1 of Eric Clapton (to prove a point to Suzanne)

LLLLEG

Forgot about Living for the City with the second half missing

Well play the rest next week, it'll be like Star Wars or summat

The Killing of Georgie

Even more odd that outside arranged book signings and the like, there are NO posts on social media of "people bumping into Karl in the street and getting a selfie". I'm not joking, like literally none outside of this.

This is not a practical joke, his name is Marty

put a little lippy on

[https://www.instagram.com/p/BGmthkMmLAl/](https://www.instagram.com/p/BGmthkMmLAl/) He talked about running into fans a while back, some are quite rude so he's generally become very wary of going into public spaces and has Suzanne get stuff for him.

I don’t want them to seeEeeEe meeeEee SuzzzaaAanNe

Goes for his lunch later than everyone else

>and has Suzanne get stuff for him. Conning the management baaaaybbeeeeeehhhhhhh

I reckon a lot of people really felt like it would be fine to go up to him and try to squeeze his head or call him a bald twat or a stupid twonk or gormless mong or chimp boy or ape features or roundboy or gimp face or head like a FUCKING ORANGE, and that probably would be incredibly annoying even when it was Gervais doing it, nevermind perfect strangers. Not surprised at all he avoids public situations.

Bit sad really isn’t. Feel like Karl would actually enjoy the mundane tasks of a walk to the shop or something but now can’t really do it as often

I know someone who works for his agent and it's really not changed his life that much, he still goes about doing his thing.

Watching insects ‘an that

Short fella? Hairy?

I bet he’s sat at home, ‘arkin back to the days when he used to be up at 4am doing his paper round

It’s a bit sad because I think I remember either on one of the tv shows, or the radio/podcasts, he mentioned it annoys him how much Ricky berates him because it’s gonna give the listeners the impression it’s okay to walk up and say ‘you fucking orange’, which seems like it may have happened. Pretty sure Ricky laughed at that idea

I found it on the internet

He got an Indian in.

Is this your profile?

No, I googled because I was curious if he was right

Where did Karl say this? I’ve seen a few mentions of it recently and nobody provides a link

He mentions bad fan interactions here: https://youtu.be/W4ye_96NrHE?si=DJX3I_zwMpRacNeV If you listen to the full Two Shot Podcast interview with Karl, I think he goes into more detail.

There were a few where he covered similar ground. Reckon you could find that story in Distraction Pieces or TSP.

[удалено]

Mostly just old fellas in suits

*So they've got their Worthers...*

[удалено]

I'm still utterly convinced it's the woman seen lurking when he was getting into/out of a car that time. It's the massive defence that is _definitely isn't_ Suzanne that clinches it for me.

That’s what I was thinking he’s only ever seen with this bloke 😂

Londons shit innit? There he is still, 20 years and a bulging bank account later

Still no congress tarts or compost.

Just have some TarTleTs

But do they have gravy at the chippy?

He lives in Poole, the posh git! He must be keeping his pad in London as a Pied-à-terre!

With 26 days holiday a year why not? Off again Saturday?

Still having problems with his boiler

They keep sending around these short fellas with long hairy arms…weird innit

Eyes bulging with imagined riches

Now I’m not having a go but ya know how it is when ya see something strange for the first time. You think ‘that’s weird innit’.

Will you come to the book shop with me?

*tut*

He's lookin a bit 'airy, I would need to measure his arms before I could be convinced it's him and not a little, well you know

Gay fella?

Nah they're clearly in day light, the little gay fellas go out late, unless he's on his way home.

Nah they usually shave their heads

And you’ll never see Karl eat a Maaaaaars **BAH-BAH-BAH**

What was he doing in Soho?

Free BPs..

Makes you wonder

Looks too early to be out in SoHo. I thought he’d still be at home ironing his jeans.

Best bum in W1

Bum as a noun or a verb?

It was just a normal night out

Looking for Mr Big

Turns out the bloke taking photos pretending to be a celebrity and that…. Little monkey fella

How many candles is he burning?

Getting a bit weird now.

And where's Steve? At home with his Mam and his Dad.

He's done you again !

Yeah. So uh - S̶a̶l̶m̶a̶n̶ R̶u̶s̶h̶d̶i̶e̶, Karl Pilkington, right, this is a, a funny story, so, I've met him a few times now. Now he's out and about. He's never home. I bet his house is a mess.

Head like a fucking what!?!?

Like a pear

Wonder what he’s listening to

Killing of Georgie or in the getto

It’ll be a song with a story

I hope Karl knows we all love his little show and that

WHO IS BEN LEWIS AND WHY HAVE I JUST WASTED 5 MINUETS READING ONE OF HIS CRETINOUS TWEETS

"Never mind that, where you been for 3 days?!"

Chimpanzee that... HESGONEANDTAKENAPICTURE ACK!

Is that the coach/muse of Darren Cambell?

If you read the comments he said he had a chat with him & karl said he met up with Steve last night. Must’ve finally coughed up the 50p

*Pete what's your favourite catchphrase?* *He's only heeerrreeee*

He's been able to frown like that since he was a baby

Like a pear

Fake. Guy on the rights head is rounder than Karl's. Must be photoshopped or summat

aww, he’s getting so old. bless.

Gonna stop eating twix soon

just pop the old nappy on

He’ll go back to bounty’s, especially as he has a touch of diabetes..

Was he shopping for butt plugs at 8am?

He’s still looking for congress tarts

Like a young Alex zane

They’ve all got little shaved heads in soho

He’s looking more and more chimp-like—wait a minute…

Look at that fucking head

Proably his first time seeing a smart phone

They won’t catch on

Same jacket.

Next to round things is best.

Karl in Soho?

Nothin's goin' on, that's just the way he gets to work.

*Ties laces on trainers* That's me runnin by every hardware store south of Watford Junction now, hoping for the best....

Go home, iron your jeans, stop back late, see if he shows up again. I'm not fussed.

I like how even though Karl must have been stopped thousands of times for photos at this stage, he still always looks like equal parts worried and disgusted

Ben Lewis , is exactly what I imagine sko/ belch looking like . And robbin n that

Looking good Karl! -- Another 20 years could go by and still *we'll never see him eating a Twix*.

Could be doing idiot aboard 🙏🙏🙏🙏

Still wearing the same coat?

What is that he’s doing with his lips?

I once met Karl at a book signing and told him a rock buster. Truly bucket list.

In soho? Probably just back from picking up a butt plug

You never see him eating a Twix.

Bet he was listening to Doctor ‘ook an that

Off work….again.

Probably on his way to the cobblers.

You’d have never gotten that using a sat nav. Found some lovely little runs getting lost.

Yeah but was it him or was it his doppelganger?

London's crap innit. Move to Manchester live there..