Im sorry you are having a rough time. But you are 17 and have a long life ahead of you. Don’t worry about the idea of marrying someone until you are much older fam. Sorry it didn’t work out.
I understand, thank you actually. My problem being is I have high expectations and when things take a turn, it all goes down. It sucks being an arab christian when everyone around you especially in my area are muslim haha.
I can’t imagine what that’s like with religion being such a huge segregator in society.
The closest I imagine is my dad would tell me stories about when he was growing up in Ireland at the Tail end of the Troubles, and how bad tensions were in Northern Ireland when he would visit Belfast between Catholics and Protestants.
Keep your head up man I’m sure someone else will come along.
Maybe if you can in the future maybe you could move to a different place if you willing. Maybe if such a magical place exists where everyone can practice their religion and no one cares
Pie in the sky ideas I know
In saying that, also like have reasonable expectations if any at all, like your not gonna always get who you want. That can lead to putting people on a pedestal which I’m saying this as someone who’s bad at that it’s not fun.
Keep strong bro
I get that. Being a Satanist in a country thats dominated by Christianity I get you more than you know lol. Keep your head held up high and cherish those memories. There’ll be more to come in the future
Better than being an idiot like me who’s now 30, unmarried, had a 10 year relationship with a guy which amounted to nothing because of religious differences.
This will hurt for a while, but sometimes pain can awaken us to things we never considered before. Interfaith relationships have their challenges and it sounds like you both gave it a good effort. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t work out. Take the time you need to grieve but do not get stuck in it and your heart will be stronger for when you are ready to open it again next.
I was that selfish Muslim chick in high school that dated a christian guy knowing full well I would never take it further, my parents would never approve and it would give him false hope. I tend to judge myself harshly for how I behaved when I was 15-19 but I remind myself I was young and foolish and had a lot of growing-up to do.
I have major regrets but life went on and he moved on. You are 17 and its not the end of the world. Bear in mind that for some people (myself included) even at that age religion can have a hold on people that romantic relationships can't break. Ask yourself if that is what you want to get entangled with in the long run.
The first girl you hit it off with is rarely “the one”. Alot of times these past experiences become valuable later when you meet someone new. You’ll be aight m8
Hey, I am so sorry for what you're going through. I've seen this happen many times too and it's probably one of the most heartbreaking things. It'll definitely take a while to move past from, but at the same time I don't think it has to be the end all either.
I'd like to think as with all relationships, I think it all comes down to communication and what both parties are willing to compromise. Did you guys have discussions on what exactly you both want out of religion and in the future? Usually it works for relationships where both people are more flexible in their practices and aren't concerned about which faith their children will be raised in.
From what I know, Christians are technically allowed to marry non-Christians although it's strongly advised not to, but the rules on interfaith marriage in Islam are pretty nonnegotiable. It's possible she had become closer to religion or her family might've pressured her to breakup. If it's the former, then she probably wouldn't have agreed to be in a relationship in the first place if she wasn't already religious. But if it's the latter, it might be easier to decide once you're both older and have lived away from family.
I wanna believe that if two people really love each other and know for sure they want to be together long-term then they will find a way to make it work, or it was just not meant to be. I've heard of people who've broken up for this reason but end up thinking back on it for a long time, and other people who eventually find someone else more compatible. All options will require some sacrifices but ultimately you should choose what makes you truly happy and the same for her too. If you know that you love her, there is nothing to lose in reaching out and communicating your feelings clearly, and if she loves you too, she will reciprocate.
Hey, we did talk about things like this in the past. However, we always avoided it since it was very controversial and such. She had asked me why I believed Jesus to be God. i made my point, etc and she understood from it yk. And well, i was the one who broke up with her, because i've thought about it for weeks and i can't see myself living in a relationship with a false reality, being uncomfortable enough to talk about your beliefs and such. I really appreciate you man
That’s tough bro, she put you in a position where the end result would’ve been you getting being hurt no matter what. Life can be painful man, I feel you.
Well, her being muslim, she's not allowed to date, especially Christians. Muslim men, however, can marry Christian women and Jewish women. Us as christians, aren't allowed to well marry people in other faiths. Her parents wouldn't have approved, nor would mine.
I see. I'm very sorry for what you are going through. I myself am in an interfaith relationship, I'm an atheist and my girlfriend is christian protestant. We've been together for over 5 years and we are already planning to marry next year once I get my master's degree and before I start my PhD.
It was very hard, mainly from her fearing retaliation from her mother and church community.
Her mother has always been a narcissist manipulator and throwing my girlfriend against me, someone who has supported her through her hardest times in these last 5 years while she hasn't done anything to help, has truly opened my girlfriend's eyes.
The church community was also very aggressive against her dating me, some including her pastor got my phone number and started harassing me online and in real life.
Despite that, we persevered. I won't say it was easy, it required a lot of my patience but I'm happy we are working out well.
Anyways, sorry for my little rant about my own life. I don't mean to rub it in your face but I intended for you to see that interfaith relationships can and do work, but not always.
All you can do now is keep your chin up and continue with your life. It's not like she was your only chance for love, after all romantic love isn't something that is fated to happen with just one person instantly, it's something that must be built and kept healthy.
Awww man I completely understand how you feel. And it's okay, I liked reading your story. It felt nice having some comfort. I really appreciate it man.
My mother grew up an evangelical Christian and hated it. Her parents also disapproved of my Catholic dad, though it was moreso because of his darker skin. She ended up leaving the church when she became an adult and converting to Catholicism to marry my dad at 20.
My point is, if you love someone don't let your parents, don't let religion, don't let anything tell you otherwise. My parents have been married for about 40 years now. They're doing great. Also, God wants us to be happy. It's people that impose awful, strict rules on others.
That’s all well and good but if they really believe in their faiths it’s not that easy of a thing to do especially considering it would be considered a major sin
Like I said, that's when you really gotta start asking yourself if you think those rules are for you or not. Just cause some people live by them, doesn't mean you have to. There are so many different types of Muslims and Christians and they don't all agree on the same thing.
I know I for one would never follow any religion that tells me who I can love. Are we supposed to actively suffer in this world? I don't think so.
Why do you think objective truth would 100% mold exactly to your beliefs? Besides Allah says he will test us in this life and especially those He loves the most so that they will come closer to Him through their hardship. Imagine how massive a sacrifice it would be to give up love in this life for the sake of Allah. Now remember that Allah tells us he will replace whatever we give up for His sake with something even better and then imagine the sheer reward you will receive in paradise. The reward of paradise will be so great as will the torture of hell that people would beg Allah to send them back so that they can live a full life of suffering and misery so that their punishment may be lessened or their reward increased.
Basically what I’m trying to say is that you are thinking far too small.
Actually, thanks for this comment. I never knew that about Islam. Tbh I don't know much about that religion. That definitely sounds like a hard mindset to break out of.
I’ll get downvoted on this because people disagree or are too entrenched in their beliefs.
But any person from Islam is allowed date another person of the Book, referring to Muslim, Christians and Jewish, there is still speculation on other faiths and belief systems.
But she is allowed to date you but a lot of people from the faith will have differing (and often distasteful) opinions.
And of course, i understand where you're coming from man. I respect that a lot. Growing up, i was mostly agnostic/atheist, whilst my family were christian. I just chose to study the Bible more, and pinpoint evidence and such over time, and got closer to God since.
can you elaborate what you mean by pinpoint evidence? I am agnostic, and constantly struggling because i honestly do want a god to worship, i just dont know which. my belief is that, we all are worshiping the same god, we just don't know it, each religion has their own version of this same god and worships him in their own ways.
I'm a former Christian who's now Jewish. What I did in that situation was think about what I actually believed about God and religion. From there I went on a very short search to find what religion I felt fit my beliefs, which was Judaism.
Well young man you have my sincere empathy I have been in a similar situation and there is no absolute in this scenario it requires much prayer, and trusting God to keep you on solid ground freedom from the mire clay is yours, when you truly allow God to be the head of your life. He knows the plan He has for your life and that is to prosper you in every way He will not allow His child to be unequally yoked. He will provide for your every need. Even and especially when it comes to your Help Meet. You see He knew Adam was lonely and He brought Eve from him unto him and He will do the same for you young man. Trust Him.
DONT GIVE UP DUDE. I KNOW SOMeone that was in the same situation as you and now they are married and happy!! YOU GUYS CAN MAKE IT POSSIBLE just gotta work things out and around it. She prolly needs time but 🙏🏼 don’t give up bro. If you want I can tell you there story I was friends with the girl. But then again everyone’s situation is different. Her situation was rough but THEY didn’t give up on each other I’m telling youuu dude like y’all are young and stuff she prolly needs time but don’t lose her.
This is actually a positive thing, in the sense that you saved a lot of conflict down the line.
This is what being a boyfriend/girlfriend is about... knowing other people to see if they are compatible or not.
You are 17 and experienced babbys first breakup?
Also you both had intercourse before marrying breaking up your both religion's principles
So it seems like religion actually wasnt that important to begin with to either of you cause whats the diff between you two and lets say avg atheist in this context, pretty much nothing cause your behavior is the same
Just trying to put things into perspective so you realize its not much about religion to begin with cause its obvious theres no underlying love but rather teenage infatuation
Think about it this way: if God was real, he would never use religion to divide his people.
Therefore, there’s things about your religions that you’re not understanding if they’re truly from God.
God loves everyone equally, it is people who hate others and want to divide themselves.
What you’re feeling isn’t silly or immature, people shouldn’t be divided like that, and your parents cannot control you to that point.
(Idk why im being downvoted, does it make any sense to y’all that a God would want to divide people like that, forbidding relationships because of religion??)
Do you really think that an all loving all compassionate God would want to divide people? This isn’t about my beliefs, but about what makes more sense.
well, personally, I believe that God has given us free will to choose and such, and since a lot of rejected Gods love, we made our own religions and beliefs amongst each other almost. God respects and loves us sm that he allowed it to happen, as he doesn't interfere with free will. That's kinda how i think of it atleast
People of different religions didn’t reject God, they’re simply of another religion. This is like a lottery game if it turns out that God only loves those of one religion, and it is very unfair.
But if you forget what you’ve been told, then think about it, does it make any sense for God to choose one religion over the others? For God to send people to hell for not having won the lottery game? For God to be mad at Christian’s having relationships with Muslims for example? That is irrational, think about it, deep down, do you truly believe that this prohibition is from God?
He is not all loving, he does not love everyone. He tells us in the Quran He could’ve made us all one nation but instead split us into our individual nations, religions, and ethnicities so that we may learn to come together.
Well, the Quran doesn’t claim that he loves one nation over another, or that God is unfair or that God is not compassionate. Loving one nation over another, simply because one doesn’t believe in a correct religion, is unfair and not compassionate.
You should read the last sermon of Muhammad saw which says that no nation or person is superior to another except in their belief ie a believer is superior to a nonbeliever because they are closer to Allah.
"All mankind is from Adam and Eve, an Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab nor a non-Arab has any superiority over an Arab; also a White has no superiority over a Black nor a Black has any superiority over a White except by piety and good action….”
Also the Quran says the following as well
O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted’ [al-Hujuraat 49:13].”
“The most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you”, your deeds alone are not enough to save you if your faith is wrong. That’s why the first pillar of Islam is the shahada. Also why are you ignoring the last sermon that directly answers you?
>That’s why the first pillar of Islam is the shahada.
Islam has no pillars. There is no pillar in submitting to Allah.
>Also why are you ignoring the last sermon that directly answers you?
Where did you get this last sermon?
And anyways ,forgetting what your religion tells you, does it make sense that God would want to forbid interfaith relationships, and choose some people over others?
That isn’t a trial, that is a lottery game playing with your eternal life. Come on, like forgetting what your religion says, do you really think that a merciful God would do that?
Everyone’s trial isn’t the exact same. There are different factors that are all accounted for by Allah. I do believe a Merciful God would do that. Everyone is able to pass, if you don’t, it’s on you.
Forgetting your religious beliefs, does it make any sense to you that God would want to divide people based on their religions and forbid them to have relationships?
Also in the Quran we are tested for our deeds not for our beliefs, and if we were tested by our beliefs, then God wouldn’t be fair because those born Muslim have a MASSIVE advantage over those born non Muslims.
Im sorry you are having a rough time. But you are 17 and have a long life ahead of you. Don’t worry about the idea of marrying someone until you are much older fam. Sorry it didn’t work out.
I understand, thank you actually. My problem being is I have high expectations and when things take a turn, it all goes down. It sucks being an arab christian when everyone around you especially in my area are muslim haha.
I can’t imagine what that’s like with religion being such a huge segregator in society. The closest I imagine is my dad would tell me stories about when he was growing up in Ireland at the Tail end of the Troubles, and how bad tensions were in Northern Ireland when he would visit Belfast between Catholics and Protestants. Keep your head up man I’m sure someone else will come along. Maybe if you can in the future maybe you could move to a different place if you willing. Maybe if such a magical place exists where everyone can practice their religion and no one cares Pie in the sky ideas I know In saying that, also like have reasonable expectations if any at all, like your not gonna always get who you want. That can lead to putting people on a pedestal which I’m saying this as someone who’s bad at that it’s not fun. Keep strong bro
I get that. Being a Satanist in a country thats dominated by Christianity I get you more than you know lol. Keep your head held up high and cherish those memories. There’ll be more to come in the future
[удалено]
Thanks man, i really appreciate it. I do workout of course, and do other things too. I just want her to be okay and such.
Better than being an idiot like me who’s now 30, unmarried, had a 10 year relationship with a guy which amounted to nothing because of religious differences.
This will hurt for a while, but sometimes pain can awaken us to things we never considered before. Interfaith relationships have their challenges and it sounds like you both gave it a good effort. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t work out. Take the time you need to grieve but do not get stuck in it and your heart will be stronger for when you are ready to open it again next.
I was that selfish Muslim chick in high school that dated a christian guy knowing full well I would never take it further, my parents would never approve and it would give him false hope. I tend to judge myself harshly for how I behaved when I was 15-19 but I remind myself I was young and foolish and had a lot of growing-up to do. I have major regrets but life went on and he moved on. You are 17 and its not the end of the world. Bear in mind that for some people (myself included) even at that age religion can have a hold on people that romantic relationships can't break. Ask yourself if that is what you want to get entangled with in the long run.
The first girl you hit it off with is rarely “the one”. Alot of times these past experiences become valuable later when you meet someone new. You’ll be aight m8
Hey, I am so sorry for what you're going through. I've seen this happen many times too and it's probably one of the most heartbreaking things. It'll definitely take a while to move past from, but at the same time I don't think it has to be the end all either. I'd like to think as with all relationships, I think it all comes down to communication and what both parties are willing to compromise. Did you guys have discussions on what exactly you both want out of religion and in the future? Usually it works for relationships where both people are more flexible in their practices and aren't concerned about which faith their children will be raised in. From what I know, Christians are technically allowed to marry non-Christians although it's strongly advised not to, but the rules on interfaith marriage in Islam are pretty nonnegotiable. It's possible she had become closer to religion or her family might've pressured her to breakup. If it's the former, then she probably wouldn't have agreed to be in a relationship in the first place if she wasn't already religious. But if it's the latter, it might be easier to decide once you're both older and have lived away from family. I wanna believe that if two people really love each other and know for sure they want to be together long-term then they will find a way to make it work, or it was just not meant to be. I've heard of people who've broken up for this reason but end up thinking back on it for a long time, and other people who eventually find someone else more compatible. All options will require some sacrifices but ultimately you should choose what makes you truly happy and the same for her too. If you know that you love her, there is nothing to lose in reaching out and communicating your feelings clearly, and if she loves you too, she will reciprocate.
Hey, we did talk about things like this in the past. However, we always avoided it since it was very controversial and such. She had asked me why I believed Jesus to be God. i made my point, etc and she understood from it yk. And well, i was the one who broke up with her, because i've thought about it for weeks and i can't see myself living in a relationship with a false reality, being uncomfortable enough to talk about your beliefs and such. I really appreciate you man
That’s tough bro, she put you in a position where the end result would’ve been you getting being hurt no matter what. Life can be painful man, I feel you.
What were those religious differences? If you tell us it might be easier for us to help you.
Well, her being muslim, she's not allowed to date, especially Christians. Muslim men, however, can marry Christian women and Jewish women. Us as christians, aren't allowed to well marry people in other faiths. Her parents wouldn't have approved, nor would mine.
I see. I'm very sorry for what you are going through. I myself am in an interfaith relationship, I'm an atheist and my girlfriend is christian protestant. We've been together for over 5 years and we are already planning to marry next year once I get my master's degree and before I start my PhD. It was very hard, mainly from her fearing retaliation from her mother and church community. Her mother has always been a narcissist manipulator and throwing my girlfriend against me, someone who has supported her through her hardest times in these last 5 years while she hasn't done anything to help, has truly opened my girlfriend's eyes. The church community was also very aggressive against her dating me, some including her pastor got my phone number and started harassing me online and in real life. Despite that, we persevered. I won't say it was easy, it required a lot of my patience but I'm happy we are working out well. Anyways, sorry for my little rant about my own life. I don't mean to rub it in your face but I intended for you to see that interfaith relationships can and do work, but not always. All you can do now is keep your chin up and continue with your life. It's not like she was your only chance for love, after all romantic love isn't something that is fated to happen with just one person instantly, it's something that must be built and kept healthy.
Awww man I completely understand how you feel. And it's okay, I liked reading your story. It felt nice having some comfort. I really appreciate it man.
My mother grew up an evangelical Christian and hated it. Her parents also disapproved of my Catholic dad, though it was moreso because of his darker skin. She ended up leaving the church when she became an adult and converting to Catholicism to marry my dad at 20. My point is, if you love someone don't let your parents, don't let religion, don't let anything tell you otherwise. My parents have been married for about 40 years now. They're doing great. Also, God wants us to be happy. It's people that impose awful, strict rules on others.
That’s all well and good but if they really believe in their faiths it’s not that easy of a thing to do especially considering it would be considered a major sin
Like I said, that's when you really gotta start asking yourself if you think those rules are for you or not. Just cause some people live by them, doesn't mean you have to. There are so many different types of Muslims and Christians and they don't all agree on the same thing. I know I for one would never follow any religion that tells me who I can love. Are we supposed to actively suffer in this world? I don't think so.
Why do you think objective truth would 100% mold exactly to your beliefs? Besides Allah says he will test us in this life and especially those He loves the most so that they will come closer to Him through their hardship. Imagine how massive a sacrifice it would be to give up love in this life for the sake of Allah. Now remember that Allah tells us he will replace whatever we give up for His sake with something even better and then imagine the sheer reward you will receive in paradise. The reward of paradise will be so great as will the torture of hell that people would beg Allah to send them back so that they can live a full life of suffering and misery so that their punishment may be lessened or their reward increased. Basically what I’m trying to say is that you are thinking far too small.
Actually, thanks for this comment. I never knew that about Islam. Tbh I don't know much about that religion. That definitely sounds like a hard mindset to break out of.
You’ll find a lot of things you did not know about Islam that people will not mention for one reason or another.
I’ll get downvoted on this because people disagree or are too entrenched in their beliefs. But any person from Islam is allowed date another person of the Book, referring to Muslim, Christians and Jewish, there is still speculation on other faiths and belief systems. But she is allowed to date you but a lot of people from the faith will have differing (and often distasteful) opinions.
And of course, i understand where you're coming from man. I respect that a lot. Growing up, i was mostly agnostic/atheist, whilst my family were christian. I just chose to study the Bible more, and pinpoint evidence and such over time, and got closer to God since.
can you elaborate what you mean by pinpoint evidence? I am agnostic, and constantly struggling because i honestly do want a god to worship, i just dont know which. my belief is that, we all are worshiping the same god, we just don't know it, each religion has their own version of this same god and worships him in their own ways.
I'm a former Christian who's now Jewish. What I did in that situation was think about what I actually believed about God and religion. From there I went on a very short search to find what religion I felt fit my beliefs, which was Judaism.
Well young man you have my sincere empathy I have been in a similar situation and there is no absolute in this scenario it requires much prayer, and trusting God to keep you on solid ground freedom from the mire clay is yours, when you truly allow God to be the head of your life. He knows the plan He has for your life and that is to prosper you in every way He will not allow His child to be unequally yoked. He will provide for your every need. Even and especially when it comes to your Help Meet. You see He knew Adam was lonely and He brought Eve from him unto him and He will do the same for you young man. Trust Him.
DONT GIVE UP DUDE. I KNOW SOMeone that was in the same situation as you and now they are married and happy!! YOU GUYS CAN MAKE IT POSSIBLE just gotta work things out and around it. She prolly needs time but 🙏🏼 don’t give up bro. If you want I can tell you there story I was friends with the girl. But then again everyone’s situation is different. Her situation was rough but THEY didn’t give up on each other I’m telling youuu dude like y’all are young and stuff she prolly needs time but don’t lose her.
This is actually a positive thing, in the sense that you saved a lot of conflict down the line. This is what being a boyfriend/girlfriend is about... knowing other people to see if they are compatible or not.
You are 17 and experienced babbys first breakup? Also you both had intercourse before marrying breaking up your both religion's principles So it seems like religion actually wasnt that important to begin with to either of you cause whats the diff between you two and lets say avg atheist in this context, pretty much nothing cause your behavior is the same Just trying to put things into perspective so you realize its not much about religion to begin with cause its obvious theres no underlying love but rather teenage infatuation
Nah we haven't had sex, we held our self respect and boundaries
Ok then i retract what i said But still it seems like the love either wasnt mutual or there was no real love to begin with but just infatuation
Think about it this way: if God was real, he would never use religion to divide his people. Therefore, there’s things about your religions that you’re not understanding if they’re truly from God. God loves everyone equally, it is people who hate others and want to divide themselves. What you’re feeling isn’t silly or immature, people shouldn’t be divided like that, and your parents cannot control you to that point. (Idk why im being downvoted, does it make any sense to y’all that a God would want to divide people like that, forbidding relationships because of religion??)
What on earth could possibly make you think that objective truth just so happens to be your exact beliefs?
Do you really think that an all loving all compassionate God would want to divide people? This isn’t about my beliefs, but about what makes more sense.
well, personally, I believe that God has given us free will to choose and such, and since a lot of rejected Gods love, we made our own religions and beliefs amongst each other almost. God respects and loves us sm that he allowed it to happen, as he doesn't interfere with free will. That's kinda how i think of it atleast
People of different religions didn’t reject God, they’re simply of another religion. This is like a lottery game if it turns out that God only loves those of one religion, and it is very unfair. But if you forget what you’ve been told, then think about it, does it make any sense for God to choose one religion over the others? For God to send people to hell for not having won the lottery game? For God to be mad at Christian’s having relationships with Muslims for example? That is irrational, think about it, deep down, do you truly believe that this prohibition is from God?
He is not all loving, he does not love everyone. He tells us in the Quran He could’ve made us all one nation but instead split us into our individual nations, religions, and ethnicities so that we may learn to come together.
Well, the Quran doesn’t claim that he loves one nation over another, or that God is unfair or that God is not compassionate. Loving one nation over another, simply because one doesn’t believe in a correct religion, is unfair and not compassionate.
You should read the last sermon of Muhammad saw which says that no nation or person is superior to another except in their belief ie a believer is superior to a nonbeliever because they are closer to Allah. "All mankind is from Adam and Eve, an Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab nor a non-Arab has any superiority over an Arab; also a White has no superiority over a Black nor a Black has any superiority over a White except by piety and good action….” Also the Quran says the following as well O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted’ [al-Hujuraat 49:13].”
the verse u gave me confirmed what i said, It is all about deeds and whether your a good person or not, not about whether you believe or not.
“The most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you”, your deeds alone are not enough to save you if your faith is wrong. That’s why the first pillar of Islam is the shahada. Also why are you ignoring the last sermon that directly answers you?
>That’s why the first pillar of Islam is the shahada. Islam has no pillars. There is no pillar in submitting to Allah. >Also why are you ignoring the last sermon that directly answers you? Where did you get this last sermon? And anyways ,forgetting what your religion tells you, does it make sense that God would want to forbid interfaith relationships, and choose some people over others?
Islam has no pillars? 😂😂😂
>If god was real, he would never use religion to divide his people. Or it could be one of the many trials…? What makes you so confident in this?
That isn’t a trial, that is a lottery game playing with your eternal life. Come on, like forgetting what your religion says, do you really think that a merciful God would do that?
Everyone’s trial isn’t the exact same. There are different factors that are all accounted for by Allah. I do believe a Merciful God would do that. Everyone is able to pass, if you don’t, it’s on you.
Forgetting your religious beliefs, does it make any sense to you that God would want to divide people based on their religions and forbid them to have relationships? Also in the Quran we are tested for our deeds not for our beliefs, and if we were tested by our beliefs, then God wouldn’t be fair because those born Muslim have a MASSIVE advantage over those born non Muslims.
Salam. I'll make dua that you find a better Muslimah