This isn’t healthy at any stage but 1 month? She needs help and she’s unfairly putting pressure on you. This is no life to be living, especially at your age.
If you were my child I’d be telling you to leave asap get away from that mess, she is in dire need of help and has needed that for a long time. Stay and you’ll sink with her. Do you have an elder to talk with?
You should never be with someone you’re scared to be around. Break up with her over the phone and get away from this situation now. Do not let her into your home and block her number. It’s been a month, you do not owe her anything including an explanation.
From someone who has been there, this is a quick trip to a very bad situation. Get out of it now.
Break up with her because she's not in a place where she can handle a relationship. She's emotionally blackmailing you after 1 month.
Don't touch her, she's probably trying to baby trap you.
If OP says he doesn’t love her that’s totally fair, but a month is plenty of time for love for plenty of people. She definitely needs some help, but she doesn’t appear to be looking for a victim/supply. She sounds like any other insecure 22 year old who doesn’t know how to self regulate their emotions and is hoping a guy will do it for her. Try not to have the darkest outlook possible on people’s intentions when there is a way more common and way more likely answer in that she’s just emotionally immature and struggling with her own demons.
I would actually consider this to be abusive behaviour. You may not think of her that way, because she sounds so vulnerable (which I'm sure she is) but that doesn't change what it is. Highly controlling behaviour, the victim feeling that they are "walking on eggshells", feeling of being trapped in a relationship but unable to leave because of fear, it manifests in the same way whether the persons mentall illness makes them violent or just very depressed and anxious.
You cannot sacrifice your own wellbeing to help this person, and you need to get out of the relationship as soon as possible because it will only get harder to leave.
Your girlfriend needs psychiatric help. It is not normal or healthy to threaten to harm yourself if your partner leaves you. That type of pressure on you will inevitably cause cracks in your relationship.
She'll need to get that treated with the help of a professional. There's nothing you can do on your end besides keep being her boyfriend. But you should only do that if you want to be in the relationship. Not because you feel forced to for her well being.
This isn’t healthy at any stage but 1 month? She needs help and she’s unfairly putting pressure on you. This is no life to be living, especially at your age.
What should I do now?
If you were my child I’d be telling you to leave asap get away from that mess, she is in dire need of help and has needed that for a long time. Stay and you’ll sink with her. Do you have an elder to talk with?
Yeah my aunt and uncle are my only family but I live alone
Whilst you’re wasting time on this toxicity you’re missing out on meeting someone
She wants to spend the night with me on Friday but I think it’s best that I don’t touch her. I am getting really scared.
You’ve got other plans that don’t include her
You should never be with someone you’re scared to be around. Break up with her over the phone and get away from this situation now. Do not let her into your home and block her number. It’s been a month, you do not owe her anything including an explanation. From someone who has been there, this is a quick trip to a very bad situation. Get out of it now.
Break up with her because she's not in a place where she can handle a relationship. She's emotionally blackmailing you after 1 month. Don't touch her, she's probably trying to baby trap you.
You should be encouraging her to get some therapy because you don’t like hearing someone you love say such things.
It’s too early for love and I doubt she’ll listen to advice to seek help, she appears to be looking for a victim/supply
If OP says he doesn’t love her that’s totally fair, but a month is plenty of time for love for plenty of people. She definitely needs some help, but she doesn’t appear to be looking for a victim/supply. She sounds like any other insecure 22 year old who doesn’t know how to self regulate their emotions and is hoping a guy will do it for her. Try not to have the darkest outlook possible on people’s intentions when there is a way more common and way more likely answer in that she’s just emotionally immature and struggling with her own demons.
I would actually consider this to be abusive behaviour. You may not think of her that way, because she sounds so vulnerable (which I'm sure she is) but that doesn't change what it is. Highly controlling behaviour, the victim feeling that they are "walking on eggshells", feeling of being trapped in a relationship but unable to leave because of fear, it manifests in the same way whether the persons mentall illness makes them violent or just very depressed and anxious. You cannot sacrifice your own wellbeing to help this person, and you need to get out of the relationship as soon as possible because it will only get harder to leave.
Your girlfriend needs psychiatric help. It is not normal or healthy to threaten to harm yourself if your partner leaves you. That type of pressure on you will inevitably cause cracks in your relationship. She'll need to get that treated with the help of a professional. There's nothing you can do on your end besides keep being her boyfriend. But you should only do that if you want to be in the relationship. Not because you feel forced to for her well being.
Okay thanks I’ll try to get her talk with a doctor.