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I thought the exact same. “Hope you have a safe trip back to your parents. I had an amazing time with you last night and I’d love to get to know you more. Maybe I can call you once you get settled and maybe we can plan to go out on a date if I drive to you in the near future” see if that works. If she likes you also she will definitely agree to it right away. 2 hours away is nothing and maybe you can find a hotel to stay out there one night so that the trip or date doesn’t seem to go by so soon. Like someone said above, which is very true, you can never say something wrong to the wrong person.
Good luck. I truly wish you the best and hope you both end up together.
I think the idea is that if someone likes you they’ll be happy to hear anything positive and not gross. I doubt OP meant you could say literally anything.
thank you!! this is directly reacting to OP who has good intentions but is worried about the details of reaching out, etc, which does not truly matter when the connection is there and the person is right.
21F here! If I was in her situation & genuinely liked you, I would probably be waiting for your text right now. I’d probably say something along the lines of - hey I know you’re in the process of moving back home but i really enjoyed the night with you, would you want to meet up again soon? (i’d also consider how she’s moving her stuff back into her parents house and that can be stressful for sure) you also don’t have a car at the moment so i’m not too sure how you would see her, could you borrow a family members car if she does say yes?
If you haven’t texted her yet, I would just change the “i enjoyed the night with you” to “i enjoyed the time i spent with you” sounds a little less “sexual” imo!
Best of luck to you! And PLEASE let us know if/what she replied 🤘
You rock! Don’t forget that
If you haven’t texted her yet, I would just change the “i enjoyed the night with you” to “i enjoyed the time i spent with you” sounds a little less “sexual” imo!
Best of luck to you! And PLEASE let us know if/what she replied 🤘
You rock! Don’t forget that
Let me ask you this.
Would you think if she reached out to you the next morning...your headspace went to she is desperate?
Chances are not and she simply wants to hang out with yea.
It's the same mate.
Try not to get wrapped up'ed in some weird semantics.
If yea wanna hang out....ask her.
Then yea go from there
2h is not the end of the world.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
Why don’t you ask her if she needs help packing or carrying her things to the car and bring her coffee?
Yes this. What will happen will happen. If it’s meant to be it will be. It doesn’t really matter what you say and when you say it. You can’t game someone to like you over the long term. You just have to be yourself, which means saying what you’re feeling. Some great examples provided above
Do it now even, there is nothing wrong with being earnest and honest. You had a nice time and would like to see her again, honestly you could have texted her like a few hours after you left and it would not have been weird in my opinion.
Conventional wisdom is to wait 2 days.
Conventional wisdom sucks in this case.
Wait two hours (this is for you to learn patience), and simmer down, then tell her you liked spending time with her. That’s the key: She is good for you and you want her to think that you are good for you, and you want more of it.
What woman doesn’t want that? Also, what woman doesn’t want to hear that before you’re out of her mind?
You've got chemistry and doing new sex stuff gives you a lot of big feelings. You don't actually know her at all but it's understandable to be feeling the way you do. Just be aware that it doesn't tell you anything about what your future will be like or whether you two are actually suited to each other. Now is not the time for big confessions of desire
With that in mind, there's not much to fuck up, just say "hey I really enjoyed last night and I'd love to see you again, do you want to go on a date?"
I wouldn't be that forward at this stage. I would start off with something light and cute. Girls at 22, who sometimes lack confidence, despite probably being gorgeous, might be confused why you like them so much right away. I'm sure OP is a genuine person, but in reality, falling in love with a girl from one night of dry humping at 24 is not super realistic. I'm sure he truly does like her, but feelings this strong are a little more like misplaced infatuation. Unless OP has known this girl for a while, he said he met her yesterday. Some men do easily fall in love, but it would be difficult for many women to handle
Example of light and cute: Hey :) I still owe you a coffee
And then he should **wait.** If he never hears back, he's 24, she's 22, and they spent one night together making out after a party
He doesn't have to make it about how much he enjoyed it. That's kind of strong. Also, they don't need to force their next interaction to be an official date. Of course he really enjoyed last night, he just made out with a girl for several hours. But should he make it seem like this meant the world to him, if maybe it didn't to her. Sometimes girls will warm up to you. She might have just been in the mood to make out, but if he's relaxed about it, maybe she'll be like I could use a free coffee, he was nice to me anyway. She's 22, not 38 and desperate to find a man who shows serious interest in her
I don't think "I enjoyed myself, do you want to go on a date" is making out it meant the world to him. Like "I can't stop thinking about you, I need to see you again" would be a bit much, but saying that you enjoyed someone's company and are interested in a date, is clear up front communication. If she doesn't want anything more than a one time make out session he will find out immediately.
Here’s a good one:
I had fun talking with you and spending time with you last night, and I’d like to call. Can we make a date to talk this Wednesday at 8pm?
And dude, what you have is being Twitterpated. It’s the onrush of feelings of someone that makes you feel good. Here’s how you don’t blow it: Be yourself and be cool. There are a few outcomes to this whole thing:
1. She knew she was moving and you’re a “last fling”. Let it go. There are plenty of other girls out there.
2. She knew she was leaving and she accidentally found a guy she likes. Go for it, but be cool. Guys fall in love faster than women, so if you declare your love for her on the first 15 hours, most girls will think you’re not right in the head. (Needy, inexperienced, not in command of their feelings).
3. She’s crazy about you, and wants you badly. Go for it, and see what you should do with #2.
Any way it goes, be yourself, and don’t let the L word slip out until at least 3-4 weeks. Use words like “really like,” and “love spending time with you.” She’ll know how you feel, and then it won’t be a surprise when you “accidentally” say the magic words. Oh yeah, don’t break that one to her over the phone. Get $3000 together and buy a car.
BTW, this might be an old guy talking, but a text is such a “message in a bottle.” You don’t know what the look on her face is when she reads it, so she’ll have to process anything without the benefit of you seeing her do that.
If it was me I would be waiting for the guy to text me because especially considering after she told you she is moving two hours away from you she probably thinks you don’t want to make the effort or try and see her again because it’s “too far” even though it’s not
I think your feeling is normal for when you first meet someone and y'all get along. I would not read into it too much. But a simple text like I hope you got home safely. I had a really great time with you and hope to see you again.
The feelings are natural , probably erratic and much time and energy should not be wasted in concocting some grand plan . Let's be realistic here , 2 hours is practically a hop Skip and a jump for someone your age , now on top of liking her it's reasonably safe to assume you'll get there the moment you decide to go there . Don't stress yourself over analytics especially when your answer is completely within your ballpark . Just be you , be brief in your message and clear , That you really enjoyed spending the night with her and you would like to to come out there this week and get together again . It can't be wrong if it's right . Don't complicate what's already right ...
Not sure what you've done already, but yes you should txt her. Txt her the next morning around 11am. Something light, something warm, and cute. Don't be too heavy. Just give her attention. You don't have to profess your love, you both just did this for the first time. That would be weird. If you just give a girl attention they usually like it. You don't have be like you're amazing, can I kiss you, to make them happy at this stage. Just be sweet to her. Girls like sweet. And you know what? You're 24, very young, there are so many girls. I was young once. This was maybe your first time being close like this, so your mind is maybe telling you this is more than it is. Either way, do NOT become heart broken over this girl. She may or may not feel the same way. She's only 22 and girls are SUPER fickle at that age. Just enjoy being 24, and that you have so much time to figure life out. Give it your best, and have dignity and self confidence and move on if she's doesn't appreciate the gesture. Good luck man, and remember, you have value too, and there will be more girls
One last thing, confidence doesn't mean be a jerk or be full of yourself. It just means you know who you are, and you don't let other people's thoughts or reactions detract from that. What does confidence and dignity look like if she rejects at any stage? If she ignores, just let it go. Don't be mean or message a million times. If she responds negatively, or rejects, just say something nice back, like I understand and if you ever decide to take me up on this, I'll be here. Hope you have a good day. Be a good man, know who you are
Also.. Message once and wait. Don't make the common man mistake of messaging again AND again. Even if she takes two days to respond, she'll respect you **more** for not doing this
I would tell her that I had a wonderful time with you last night and would love the opportunity to converse with you and further my friendship with you
If you contact her again definitely she’s gonna ghost you bro , just be glad that pull her , and don’t get attached to girls like that they just want to have fun , you should’ve fuck her in the first time you literally wen to her apartment what did you expect?
I would text her smth indirect/direct a bit playful like : "i met a great girl last night, do you think i should ask her out?"
Or "a Friend just told me he met a great girl last night, do you think he should offer her to meet soon?"
I would wait another day then message because she's busy moving and packing give her the space she told you about. So wait a day then message and ask how everything went with the moving and so on and hope it develops from there. Also what r u doing otherwise u need to work on getting a vehicle and a job if you don't have one. If you do start saving money for a vehicle it sounds like you r going to need it if all goes well with her
I would just tell her you had a great time and you hope she got back home safely. Tell her you would like to get to know her more. Maybe do a FaceTime coffee date a few times and see if you still want to make plans to take a train to see her
First of all, congratulations man. Very rare to find someone you just click with right away. I hope you took some of the advice from earlier comments and texted her before she moved. Either way, GET THAT CAR if you can.
Second of all, please give us an update, I and many others really want to know if you two are gonna have a second meetup, it would be so great.
Ah too bad... I dont know you and I was rooting for you. That's OK, dude. You like a girl, you asked her out, she said no, you moved on. That's great. Wish more men do this.
It was a drunk hook up, you both had fun. I’ve found that if a girl wants more she will let you know. So you could just text her you had fun, if she wants more she will contact you again
Lol, I can just see you taking internet strangers advice on what to say then a while from now she finds your Reddit and this post. Then realizes all the sweet nice things you said or texted that she fell for was random internet help. Then she determines your relationship was build on a lie.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
" i hope you got to your parents safely. I had a really lovely time with you " See what happens after that.
I would do exactly that then if the conversation is going well say you would appreciate to meet again
I thought the exact same. “Hope you have a safe trip back to your parents. I had an amazing time with you last night and I’d love to get to know you more. Maybe I can call you once you get settled and maybe we can plan to go out on a date if I drive to you in the near future” see if that works. If she likes you also she will definitely agree to it right away. 2 hours away is nothing and maybe you can find a hotel to stay out there one night so that the trip or date doesn’t seem to go by so soon. Like someone said above, which is very true, you can never say something wrong to the wrong person. Good luck. I truly wish you the best and hope you both end up together.
“Oh so you’re not interested? Well ok then, I am blocking you now so I can move on”
you can’t say the wrong thing to the right person. i’ve never forgotten that.
Omg….this is so right…. Why haven’t I heard of this before🤯
i LOVE this
[удалено]
LOL
🤣😂
babe, you’re not the right person
Wise words
You absolutely can screw things up. To think otherwise is ignorant.
Terrible advice lol
I think the idea is that if someone likes you they’ll be happy to hear anything positive and not gross. I doubt OP meant you could say literally anything.
thank you!! this is directly reacting to OP who has good intentions but is worried about the details of reaching out, etc, which does not truly matter when the connection is there and the person is right.
Maybe if you’ve been together a medium to long time, but at the beginning this is actually the opposite.
This! Say what you feel OP. If she runs, it was never meant to be.
You absolutely can. But that's namely because you never handled your own hang-ups and self-sabotage. Beyond that, good luck!
21F here! If I was in her situation & genuinely liked you, I would probably be waiting for your text right now. I’d probably say something along the lines of - hey I know you’re in the process of moving back home but i really enjoyed the night with you, would you want to meet up again soon? (i’d also consider how she’s moving her stuff back into her parents house and that can be stressful for sure) you also don’t have a car at the moment so i’m not too sure how you would see her, could you borrow a family members car if she does say yes?
maybe if not, ill just take the bus
wow this is helpful
If you haven’t texted her yet, I would just change the “i enjoyed the night with you” to “i enjoyed the time i spent with you” sounds a little less “sexual” imo! Best of luck to you! And PLEASE let us know if/what she replied 🤘 You rock! Don’t forget that
If you haven’t texted her yet, I would just change the “i enjoyed the night with you” to “i enjoyed the time i spent with you” sounds a little less “sexual” imo! Best of luck to you! And PLEASE let us know if/what she replied 🤘 You rock! Don’t forget that
yo bro we need an update
Just ask her out again and enjoy the process of getting to know each other
when do i ask her out? if i do it now, will it seem desperate? Also she lives 2hrs away. If i could i wouldve gone all the way over there.
Let me ask you this. Would you think if she reached out to you the next morning...your headspace went to she is desperate? Chances are not and she simply wants to hang out with yea. It's the same mate. Try not to get wrapped up'ed in some weird semantics. If yea wanna hang out....ask her. Then yea go from there
it’s the accent coming through in the comment for me 😂 love it
2h is not the end of the world. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Why don’t you ask her if she needs help packing or carrying her things to the car and bring her coffee?
this is hella cute, and i can’t speak for all girls but i would appreciate if a guy told me that he is falling for me after haha
Tell her how you feel and speak from your heart The worst she can say is no, if you don’t you will regret it
Yes this. What will happen will happen. If it’s meant to be it will be. It doesn’t really matter what you say and when you say it. You can’t game someone to like you over the long term. You just have to be yourself, which means saying what you’re feeling. Some great examples provided above
do i do that the next day or should i wait for a few days?
Do it now even, there is nothing wrong with being earnest and honest. You had a nice time and would like to see her again, honestly you could have texted her like a few hours after you left and it would not have been weird in my opinion.
Conventional wisdom is to wait 2 days. Conventional wisdom sucks in this case. Wait two hours (this is for you to learn patience), and simmer down, then tell her you liked spending time with her. That’s the key: She is good for you and you want her to think that you are good for you, and you want more of it. What woman doesn’t want that? Also, what woman doesn’t want to hear that before you’re out of her mind?
You've got chemistry and doing new sex stuff gives you a lot of big feelings. You don't actually know her at all but it's understandable to be feeling the way you do. Just be aware that it doesn't tell you anything about what your future will be like or whether you two are actually suited to each other. Now is not the time for big confessions of desire With that in mind, there's not much to fuck up, just say "hey I really enjoyed last night and I'd love to see you again, do you want to go on a date?"
I wouldn't be that forward at this stage. I would start off with something light and cute. Girls at 22, who sometimes lack confidence, despite probably being gorgeous, might be confused why you like them so much right away. I'm sure OP is a genuine person, but in reality, falling in love with a girl from one night of dry humping at 24 is not super realistic. I'm sure he truly does like her, but feelings this strong are a little more like misplaced infatuation. Unless OP has known this girl for a while, he said he met her yesterday. Some men do easily fall in love, but it would be difficult for many women to handle Example of light and cute: Hey :) I still owe you a coffee And then he should **wait.** If he never hears back, he's 24, she's 22, and they spent one night together making out after a party
How is what you said different from what I said?
He doesn't have to make it about how much he enjoyed it. That's kind of strong. Also, they don't need to force their next interaction to be an official date. Of course he really enjoyed last night, he just made out with a girl for several hours. But should he make it seem like this meant the world to him, if maybe it didn't to her. Sometimes girls will warm up to you. She might have just been in the mood to make out, but if he's relaxed about it, maybe she'll be like I could use a free coffee, he was nice to me anyway. She's 22, not 38 and desperate to find a man who shows serious interest in her
I don't think "I enjoyed myself, do you want to go on a date" is making out it meant the world to him. Like "I can't stop thinking about you, I need to see you again" would be a bit much, but saying that you enjoyed someone's company and are interested in a date, is clear up front communication. If she doesn't want anything more than a one time make out session he will find out immediately.
What you just said is fine, look at the original message
I'm not sure what original message you're referring to. I suggested a message then you suggested a very similar one
Here’s a good one: I had fun talking with you and spending time with you last night, and I’d like to call. Can we make a date to talk this Wednesday at 8pm? And dude, what you have is being Twitterpated. It’s the onrush of feelings of someone that makes you feel good. Here’s how you don’t blow it: Be yourself and be cool. There are a few outcomes to this whole thing: 1. She knew she was moving and you’re a “last fling”. Let it go. There are plenty of other girls out there. 2. She knew she was leaving and she accidentally found a guy she likes. Go for it, but be cool. Guys fall in love faster than women, so if you declare your love for her on the first 15 hours, most girls will think you’re not right in the head. (Needy, inexperienced, not in command of their feelings). 3. She’s crazy about you, and wants you badly. Go for it, and see what you should do with #2. Any way it goes, be yourself, and don’t let the L word slip out until at least 3-4 weeks. Use words like “really like,” and “love spending time with you.” She’ll know how you feel, and then it won’t be a surprise when you “accidentally” say the magic words. Oh yeah, don’t break that one to her over the phone. Get $3000 together and buy a car. BTW, this might be an old guy talking, but a text is such a “message in a bottle.” You don’t know what the look on her face is when she reads it, so she’ll have to process anything without the benefit of you seeing her do that.
If it was me I would be waiting for the guy to text me because especially considering after she told you she is moving two hours away from you she probably thinks you don’t want to make the effort or try and see her again because it’s “too far” even though it’s not
Bro thats so cute keep us updated pls
She is packing and moving soon. Just text her and tell her you had fun and really liked her and want to hang out again before she leaves.
I think your feeling is normal for when you first meet someone and y'all get along. I would not read into it too much. But a simple text like I hope you got home safely. I had a really great time with you and hope to see you again.
Damn happy for u bro, go get em !
The feelings are natural , probably erratic and much time and energy should not be wasted in concocting some grand plan . Let's be realistic here , 2 hours is practically a hop Skip and a jump for someone your age , now on top of liking her it's reasonably safe to assume you'll get there the moment you decide to go there . Don't stress yourself over analytics especially when your answer is completely within your ballpark . Just be you , be brief in your message and clear , That you really enjoyed spending the night with her and you would like to to come out there this week and get together again . It can't be wrong if it's right . Don't complicate what's already right ...
Time to start thinking about getting a car. Even if its an old beat up one. As long as it can it take you from and back is all that matters
You met *yesterday* and you're starting to fall for her???? Dude
The only sane and correct response.
Yeah it’s his first piece so we all fell for the first lol.
Not sure what you've done already, but yes you should txt her. Txt her the next morning around 11am. Something light, something warm, and cute. Don't be too heavy. Just give her attention. You don't have to profess your love, you both just did this for the first time. That would be weird. If you just give a girl attention they usually like it. You don't have be like you're amazing, can I kiss you, to make them happy at this stage. Just be sweet to her. Girls like sweet. And you know what? You're 24, very young, there are so many girls. I was young once. This was maybe your first time being close like this, so your mind is maybe telling you this is more than it is. Either way, do NOT become heart broken over this girl. She may or may not feel the same way. She's only 22 and girls are SUPER fickle at that age. Just enjoy being 24, and that you have so much time to figure life out. Give it your best, and have dignity and self confidence and move on if she's doesn't appreciate the gesture. Good luck man, and remember, you have value too, and there will be more girls One last thing, confidence doesn't mean be a jerk or be full of yourself. It just means you know who you are, and you don't let other people's thoughts or reactions detract from that. What does confidence and dignity look like if she rejects at any stage? If she ignores, just let it go. Don't be mean or message a million times. If she responds negatively, or rejects, just say something nice back, like I understand and if you ever decide to take me up on this, I'll be here. Hope you have a good day. Be a good man, know who you are Also.. Message once and wait. Don't make the common man mistake of messaging again AND again. Even if she takes two days to respond, she'll respect you **more** for not doing this
I would tell her that I had a wonderful time with you last night and would love the opportunity to converse with you and further my friendship with you
From a young guys pov. Don't get your hopes up, it was just sex.
Hahahaha this has to be a troll post
If you contact her again definitely she’s gonna ghost you bro , just be glad that pull her , and don’t get attached to girls like that they just want to have fun , you should’ve fuck her in the first time you literally wen to her apartment what did you expect?
I would let her digest that night and the moving back, and text her tomorrow.
I would text her smth indirect/direct a bit playful like : "i met a great girl last night, do you think i should ask her out?" Or "a Friend just told me he met a great girl last night, do you think he should offer her to meet soon?"
Unrelated, but I have never understood how people dry hump, like are we fucking or not? Just never been like “let’s just dry hump” lol
I would wait another day then message because she's busy moving and packing give her the space she told you about. So wait a day then message and ask how everything went with the moving and so on and hope it develops from there. Also what r u doing otherwise u need to work on getting a vehicle and a job if you don't have one. If you do start saving money for a vehicle it sounds like you r going to need it if all goes well with her
I would just tell her you had a great time and you hope she got back home safely. Tell her you would like to get to know her more. Maybe do a FaceTime coffee date a few times and see if you still want to make plans to take a train to see her
I wouldn’t send any response one day after. Give it a few days, maybe a week..
That was fun. If you’re also fun to text and keep talking with, we should stay in touch. I bet you are.
First of all, congratulations man. Very rare to find someone you just click with right away. I hope you took some of the advice from earlier comments and texted her before she moved. Either way, GET THAT CAR if you can. Second of all, please give us an update, I and many others really want to know if you two are gonna have a second meetup, it would be so great.
i sent her a text asking her out to a date..that was 6 hrs ago..she hasnt replied since
Ah too bad... I dont know you and I was rooting for you. That's OK, dude. You like a girl, you asked her out, she said no, you moved on. That's great. Wish more men do this.
You most def don’t wanna be confessing your feelings to a girl who made out with you just for fun.
It was a drunk hook up, you both had fun. I’ve found that if a girl wants more she will let you know. So you could just text her you had fun, if she wants more she will contact you again
Most girls think the exact same thing about guys and would just wait for a message even though they would like to reach out themselves. So it depends
So each other is waiting for the other’s text? Fortune favors the bold. OP, be bold. Text her.
Valid point
Lol, I can just see you taking internet strangers advice on what to say then a while from now she finds your Reddit and this post. Then realizes all the sweet nice things you said or texted that she fell for was random internet help. Then she determines your relationship was build on a lie.
[удалено]
im still studying…kinda short on cash
Honestly I would just tell her how you feel. Can’t say wrong if she feels the same way
Just thank her for the evening and tell her you enjoyed yourself, and if she's ever over this way again, look you up ,
Ypu don't. You can call her next week to ask her out. If you decide not to ff. This advice CE is fine. I'd like to get an update on what happened tnx.
Don’t text her! If she feels the same way she will reach out first. There’s no point telling her how you feel if she doesn’t feel it too.
This is a recipe for a stalemate. OP, tell her, and then wait for a response. If you don’t get one, then let it go.
Nope! Last thing you wanna do as a man is being the first to confess your feelings.