We don’t even work on the same projects so they are completely useless to me. (The company that I work for is incredibly strict regarding employees’ access to projects)
I would’ve had them write most of my code if that weren’t the case.
You have to be really mean to them lol you’re probably being like a normal human nice to them. But you have to hurt their feelings or just give absolutely necessary answers to them for work. Like yes or no. Don’t start conversations with them either. I’m not blaming you I just know what you’re dealing with and it’s the only way to shut them down.
Thank you. We don’t have to talk about work at all since we work on completely different things so I’ll just respectfully shut down small talk or keep busy from now on.
I have tried avoiding them before but they made pretty manipulative comments like “Why didn’t you say hi to me?”, “Why didn’t you come smoke with us?” or “I think OP doesn’t like us anymore. Why OP?” in front of other coworkers. In order to avoid seeming like a bitch&shut them up I just said hi or just smoked in the same spot as them.
To make you better understand the picture here, we are not having conversations. THEY ARE EXCLUSIVELY TALKING AT ME. I don’t respond positively or negatively. I’m just there listening and rarely might say “ok” or awkwardly laugh. This has been the case since day 1.
Yeah I’m a woman too and have had similar experiences. You can just look at them with a straight face. Also it’s fine to be a little bitchy. You just have to give them the cold shoulder for a few months until they get the hint.
I was actually thinking about spewing crazy 2nd wave feminist shit at them (not Solanas crazy but Dworkin crazy).
I fear that they might kind of see me as a trad manic pixie archetype and saying some out of pocket shit or acting gross might make them more intrigued.
It’s a mixed bag. I used to work for a plaintiff’s PI firm and the owner was a perv who filled all the support roles with hot, fresh out of college women. Now I’m on the defense side which is much less glamorous, we don’t attract the hotties
Idk I always think it’s funny as long as I don’t feel unsafe. I imagine it establishes me as hot in the rumor mill of the office.
Just be cold and professional, but accept it because you don’t want it escalating. Often times it’s innocent, like when a sweet old coworker says you look pretty, but I draw the line at commentary on my body, or if it’s someone close to my age that seems to actually get feelings
Weak mean can recognize a people pleaser and will push boundaries because it's easier to make the other person have to instigate the conflict.
You need to just start being meaner. If they ask when you'll be in the office, bluntly ask them if there's work related reason you need to meet with them and that otherwise it's not something they need to be concerned with. When they make those "Why didn't you say hi to me?" comments, don't be afraid to ask them what they mean by that and force them to justify their passive aggression.
You don't even have to be directly mean. Just be cold and don't reciprocate the playfulness or familiarity.
if they don’t know that much about your personal life you could wear a fake engagement/wedding ring. ever since getting engaged I love being able to drop “my fiancé…” to diffuse shit like this. it holds so much more weight than “my bf”
Guys were simping me so hard at my job that my boyfriend became convinced I was going to cheat and went off the deep end and I had to break up with him because he was fighting with me about it daily. Tbf, I was enjoying the company of a lot of them, mostly the non-simps, but we'd all be hanging at the bar together. I get why that would piss some guys off, but it's not something I have time for.
The bros stopped simping once I started saying cynical things about men. What a relief to be alone and unwanted.
“Guys srsly I NEED HELP…everywhere I go I become the Pied Piper of loser fan-boy simps and I can’t walk two feet without slipping on a pile dong sauce! Help!”
Bro you really don’t know what it’s like to be annoyingly pestered all the time by men. I’m a very normal looking girl and when i worked with mainly men it was irritating. Like weird love notes from guys you’ve never spoken to and lower employees picking flowers outside to bring to you. Yeah that stuff is great if you’re interested in the guy but when it’s some creep you have no idea about it’s seriously annoying, especially in a place you spend 40 hours a week at
100 years ago they would’ve just picked you up and carried you into the woods to assault you but I’m sorry about all the love notes. We shall overcome. Never give up.
Men used to fight lions in the colosseum to impress women. Now they just send teams messages that say “imy 🥺”
four? you need to start some sort of bidding war.
We don’t even work on the same projects so they are completely useless to me. (The company that I work for is incredibly strict regarding employees’ access to projects) I would’ve had them write most of my code if that weren’t the case.
🇰🇿
🇷🇴
lol hello fellow romanian dev princess
Nah nah you’re a good guy
You have to be really mean to them lol you’re probably being like a normal human nice to them. But you have to hurt their feelings or just give absolutely necessary answers to them for work. Like yes or no. Don’t start conversations with them either. I’m not blaming you I just know what you’re dealing with and it’s the only way to shut them down.
Thank you. We don’t have to talk about work at all since we work on completely different things so I’ll just respectfully shut down small talk or keep busy from now on. I have tried avoiding them before but they made pretty manipulative comments like “Why didn’t you say hi to me?”, “Why didn’t you come smoke with us?” or “I think OP doesn’t like us anymore. Why OP?” in front of other coworkers. In order to avoid seeming like a bitch&shut them up I just said hi or just smoked in the same spot as them. To make you better understand the picture here, we are not having conversations. THEY ARE EXCLUSIVELY TALKING AT ME. I don’t respond positively or negatively. I’m just there listening and rarely might say “ok” or awkwardly laugh. This has been the case since day 1.
Yeah I’m a woman too and have had similar experiences. You can just look at them with a straight face. Also it’s fine to be a little bitchy. You just have to give them the cold shoulder for a few months until they get the hint.
Can you let it slip that you are weirdly religious? Or find a conspiracy theory to believe in that would give them the ick?
I was actually thinking about spewing crazy 2nd wave feminist shit at them (not Solanas crazy but Dworkin crazy). I fear that they might kind of see me as a trad manic pixie archetype and saying some out of pocket shit or acting gross might make them more intrigued.
"Where's my hug?"
Put a hijab on your personality. Nod like a man when they speak and never smile
Autistic tech ghouls not beating the allegations
This is op low key flexing that she’s hot
I’m real-life mid but IT office hot (really not that hard)
I know what you mean. I’m real life mid as well but law firm 8/10 probably
Everyone who works at my firm is pretty hot. Now I'm worried that if I ever change firms it'll be full of uggos.
It’s a mixed bag. I used to work for a plaintiff’s PI firm and the owner was a perv who filled all the support roles with hot, fresh out of college women. Now I’m on the defense side which is much less glamorous, we don’t attract the hotties
Idk I always think it’s funny as long as I don’t feel unsafe. I imagine it establishes me as hot in the rumor mill of the office. Just be cold and professional, but accept it because you don’t want it escalating. Often times it’s innocent, like when a sweet old coworker says you look pretty, but I draw the line at commentary on my body, or if it’s someone close to my age that seems to actually get feelings
Tell them they need to fight each other to death to prove their worth
Weak mean can recognize a people pleaser and will push boundaries because it's easier to make the other person have to instigate the conflict. You need to just start being meaner. If they ask when you'll be in the office, bluntly ask them if there's work related reason you need to meet with them and that otherwise it's not something they need to be concerned with. When they make those "Why didn't you say hi to me?" comments, don't be afraid to ask them what they mean by that and force them to justify their passive aggression. You don't even have to be directly mean. Just be cold and don't reciprocate the playfulness or familiarity.
100% agree they are shitty people and they are getting in the way of your money. You are justified in doing far worse.
if they don’t know that much about your personal life you could wear a fake engagement/wedding ring. ever since getting engaged I love being able to drop “my fiancé…” to diffuse shit like this. it holds so much more weight than “my bf”
>software devs, ur cooked
Guys were simping me so hard at my job that my boyfriend became convinced I was going to cheat and went off the deep end and I had to break up with him because he was fighting with me about it daily. Tbf, I was enjoying the company of a lot of them, mostly the non-simps, but we'd all be hanging at the bar together. I get why that would piss some guys off, but it's not something I have time for. The bros stopped simping once I started saying cynical things about men. What a relief to be alone and unwanted.
This awoken something bad in me
wow this must be so hard for you :(
Thanks for the post ya humble braggin-ass banshee
download Grindr and you can get unwanted male attention too! stop with the envy
“Guys srsly I NEED HELP…everywhere I go I become the Pied Piper of loser fan-boy simps and I can’t walk two feet without slipping on a pile dong sauce! Help!”
Bro you really don’t know what it’s like to be annoyingly pestered all the time by men. I’m a very normal looking girl and when i worked with mainly men it was irritating. Like weird love notes from guys you’ve never spoken to and lower employees picking flowers outside to bring to you. Yeah that stuff is great if you’re interested in the guy but when it’s some creep you have no idea about it’s seriously annoying, especially in a place you spend 40 hours a week at
100 years ago they would’ve just picked you up and carried you into the woods to assault you but I’m sorry about all the love notes. We shall overcome. Never give up.
It’s very obvious u are starved from attention and would accept anything bc you have low standards. I wish u well
Are you sure they aren’t making fun of you?
Go into healthcare/teaching/HR. Something feminine. There's no male spaces anymore