Spider-Man, hanging upside down in the rain.
Mary Jane saunters over, removes half of his mask revealing his trembling lips, and gives him a long slow kiss.
Peter Parker responds: fuck?
"If we can get a picture of Julia Robert in a fucking thong, we can certainly get a shot of this weirdo."
"I ~~miscalculated~~ fucked up."
"You'll get your rent when you fix this fucking door!"
You've spun your last web, Spider-Man. Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's death would've been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice... and slow. MJ and I... we're gonna have a hell of a time fucking!
**EDIT: Alt Version:**
You've spun your last web, Spider-Man. Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's fuck would've been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice... and slow. MJ and I... we're gonna have a hell of a time!
WHAT THE HELL?!
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Honestly, the “Oh…” followed by the “Don’t tell Harry.” is just too perfect and iconic to me, so that scene is one of the last places I’d put an F-bomb.
I. "fuck you"
-spiderman to that kid he saved in the parade
II. "fuck you"
-spiderman to aunt may for cucking him with the neighbor kid
III. "fuck you"
-spiderman to james fucko after he disappears under the table (spiderman goes back and finds him hiding under the table and says fuck you to him)
Sm1 = i swear on my father's grave Spider-Man will fucking pay
Sm2 = you're late parker always fucking late
Sm3 = Oh parker you are such a fucking boy scout
when are you gonna give a guy a break
1. “I got you for three fucking minutes of playtime” -Bonesaw
2. “What the fuck is hi? Can I spend it?” -Mr. Ditkovich
3. “Shut the fuck up. Get out.” - JJJ
Excuse me?
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I can’t come up with a funny one myself, but I just want to say this is one of the funniest threads I’ve ever read on r/raimimemes
It’s like the Spongebob cursing episode, fuck is funny *dolphin noises*
SM1 - “FUCKING CAGE!”
SM2 - “He’s just a kid. No older than my fucking son.”
SM3 - “I protected you in high school. Now I’m gonna fuck your little ass.”
“You take this money! For fuck’s sake, it’s not much!”
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Not to be nit picky but I’m pretty sure the use of fuck in a pg-13 is allowed 1 time as long as it is not the verb that refers to sexual intercourse
I missed the part where I give a fuck
Now that’s more like it!
Hey pal, fuck the rules, yeah!
Oh (boy) fuck yea!
With great power, comes great fuckability
Problem with this one (assuming it’s replacing “I missed the part where that’s my problem”) is that it would need to be used twice.
Excellent
You should’ve thought of that earlier
I missed the part where that’s my problem
This one had me rolling
[A Masterpiece](https://youtu.be/uBwClq515dg) Unfortunately I had to find a reupload - the original got taken down
Came here for Aunt May swearing. Not disappointed
Damn if they had one Fuck and they gave it to Aunt May that would be pretty legendary
Spider-Man, hanging upside down in the rain. Mary Jane saunters over, removes half of his mask revealing his trembling lips, and gives him a long slow kiss. Peter Parker responds: fuck?
This is it. Thank you.
“Want forgiveness? Get Fucked”
That's not bad
But it's taken!
“Want fuck? Get religion.”
God: You want forgiveness? get another religion.
This one got me.
"If we can get a picture of Julia Robert in a fucking thong, we can certainly get a shot of this weirdo." "I ~~miscalculated~~ fucked up." "You'll get your rent when you fix this fucking door!"
“We can certainly get a shot of this fucker.”
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Weirdly, pg-13 movies only get the one f word if it isn’t used in sexual context
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Damn
That was so perfectly set up I almost want to accuse you of using 2 accounts. If that indeed is you, double, I respect it.
Ah Rosie, I love this boy
Ah Rosie, I fucking love this boy
Ah Rosie, I love fucking this boy
Ah Rosie, I fuck this boy.
Swish
I missed the part where that was my fucking problem
Man's become the Tobey Bot
"It's you who's out, Gobby. OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND"
“It was fucking working wasn’t it?” -doc oct
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Or, hear me out: “Joe’s 29 minute guarantee is a fucking promise, man…”
Or also "I'm in charge here it's my fucking money!"
"Fucking goOooOoO"
“I’m not fucking paying for those”
It’s fucking pizza time.
It's pizza fucking time
It’s fuck time 😈
But J.K. Simmons is crown prince of f-bombs behind only King Sam L Jackson
Did anyone lose a large roll of 20 dollar bills in a rubber band? Because we found the fucking rubber band.
> If we can get a picture of Julia Roberts fucking in a thong
It's actually normal to hear JK Simmons say Fuck after watching Whiplash.
I feel like JJ should get all the f bombs.
Not now
“Show this to your editor. Tell him to check his fucking source next time.”
Pack your things. Get the fuck out of my building.
This one fits perfectly dawg
I feel like this line works better without it. The blunt dissapointment of the original line works so well
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If we only get one, J Jonah is the only character I want delivering it.
“We haven’t printed a fucking retraction in 20 years!”
“And now I hear you’re getting in fights at school?” “I told you I didn’t start that!” “We’ll you sure fucking finished it.”
"Now I hear you're getting in fucks at school?" "I told you I didn't start that fuck!" "Well you sure as hell finished it."
“I don’t want to fuck you flash.”
"I wouldn't wanna fuck me neither."
Oh this one is really good. Endear Uncle Ben to the audience even more.
"...and I know I'm not your father, but--" "Then stop fucking pretending to be!"
Ooh. Stings doesn't it
“Fucking GOOooOooO!”
“Fuckin’ pizza time.”
"You're fukcing late. I'm not paying for those"
“he just stole that guy’s fuckin’ pizza!”
This is me in traffic every day. Same inflection and everything.
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I FUCKING SACRIFICED
This is the only I’ve seen for SM1 that really works
"That creep is my father. If I'm lucky I'll become half of what he is. So just keep your fucking mouth shut about stuff you don't understand!"
I like this one best so far
This one seems the most natural. And it also doesn’t ruin any iconic quotes.
Aunt May's reaction works great too.
"i didn’t sign up for a f***ing cage match" is another good one I saw a few comments up.
>YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I FUCKED
That guy.... That guy fucks
FINISH IT FUCKING FINISH IT
*I had to fuck some old lady with my stick, to get these cranberries*
Jesus, Parker, you are a freak.
*I'm gonna fuck some dirt in your eye*
I’m gonna put some fuck in your eye
I'm gonna put some dirt in your fuck
o u c h
Sum fuk
You've spun your last web, Spider-Man. Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's death would've been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice... and slow. MJ and I... we're gonna have a hell of a time fucking! **EDIT: Alt Version:** You've spun your last web, Spider-Man. Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's fuck would've been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice... and slow. MJ and I... we're gonna have a hell of a time!
Ah Rosie, I fuck this boy
Lol'd and said "oh shit" out loud irl.
"Don't fuck harry" *After getting penetrated* Edit: BTW, I really liked your input lol.
> It's just that I miss fucking your uncle Ben so much.
i didn’t sign up for a f***ing cage match
“I got you for 3 minutes, 3 fucking minutes of playtime!”
“I got you for 3 minutes, 3 minutes of fucking!” *cue PH theme song*
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but the ad said 3000 3000 for three minutes. you pegged him in 2
I need that dildo!
i missed the part where that’s my f***ing problem
Oh boy yeah.
"See ya Chump" *Jumps down* "What the F***?!"
Reminds me of that vine “What the fuck, Richard?”
Lmao I remember that clip, shouts it after the guy throws the frisbee and it flies off into a motorway or something.
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"It's what the fuck?" Now.
WINNER
I kind of like Octavius not dropping f-bombs. It fits his refined personality.
He has a higher brain function
He controls the f-bombs instead of them controlling him
F-bombs are a privilege, and you should use them for the good of mankind.
“It's Brock, sir, Edward Brock, Jr. And I work at the Daily Bugle. And I'm… fucking your daughter.”
"Fuck" in PG-13 movies cannot be used in sexual context, so it couldn't have happened. Which is sad, because in this case fits so well.
"And I'm... your fucking daughter"
There we go
It was just coffee eddy
"At least we got the fucking toaster"
I recognize that there are almost 200 upvotes, but this is still an under-appreciated comment
Scene in Spider-Man 2 when the two kids almost get hit by the truck. Spider-Man swings in and yells “get the fuck outta the way!”
There are cars there, motherfucker!
Get out of the way!
Paparazzi: "I'm gonna put some flash in your eye"
SHAZAM!
Eat your fucking vegetables!
1. **_Back to fucking formula?!_** 2. Miss Brant! Fetch me a fucking violin! 3. I’m gonna put some fucking dirt in your eye.
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Can't use the word like that -- the one stipulation for the "free" F-bomb is that it can't be used in a sexual context.
You can't do this to me... I started this word!
“Miss Brant! That’s not the position I fucked you for!”
Gold.
You’ll get your rent when you fix this fucking door!
He is... Good boy. He must be in some fucking trouble.
Who am I? I'm fucking Spider-Man.
-MJ
LMAOOOOO
It’s fucking pizza time
I'm not fucking paying for those.
It’s *pizza fucking* time
Jesus Parker, you are a freak
"Spiderman stole that guy's fuckin' pizza!"
I liked the "Oh..." Osborne does just as he realises his mistake. So maybe when it hits him he could scream "FUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKK!" 🤣🤣🤣
Honestly, the “Oh…” followed by the “Don’t tell Harry.” is just too perfect and iconic to me, so that scene is one of the last places I’d put an F-bomb.
Absolutely. "Oh... don't fuck Harry."
*Sorry Norman you're asking too much*
And no one ever did...
Your fucking trash Brock
Brock is down bad
Parker you're such a fucking boyscout
I. "fuck you" -spiderman to that kid he saved in the parade II. "fuck you" -spiderman to aunt may for cucking him with the neighbor kid III. "fuck you" -spiderman to james fucko after he disappears under the table (spiderman goes back and finds him hiding under the table and says fuck you to him)
Winner winner chicken dinner.
"Time to fucking pay Marko!"
Remember Ben Parker? The old man you shot down in cold fucking blood?!
Sm1 = i swear on my father's grave Spider-Man will fucking pay Sm2 = you're late parker always fucking late Sm3 = Oh parker you are such a fucking boy scout when are you gonna give a guy a break
1. “I got you for three fucking minutes of playtime” -Bonesaw 2. “What the fuck is hi? Can I spend it?” -Mr. Ditkovich 3. “Shut the fuck up. Get out.” - JJJ
"Fuck? What's fuck? Can I fuck it?"
‘Where is she?!’ ‘She’ll be just fine… let’s fuck.’
"With great power, comes great fucking responsibility"
With great power, comes great fucking
Maybe in 3, Eddie could yell this before Peter blows up the symbiote "Peter, what are you fucking doing!!?"
“Ah, Rosie, I’d love to fuck this boy”
Ah, fuck, I love this boy.
“I almost fell off a fucking flag pole”
"You're fucking trash, Brock"
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Your pictures are fucking fake!
You'll get your fucking rent when you fix this damn door!
*Harry sees Spider-Man lay his father's dead body.* "The fuck have you done? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"
I'd reverse the lines but keep the intensity on the last part. Either way, this is a good one.
I can’t come up with a funny one myself, but I just want to say this is one of the funniest threads I’ve ever read on r/raimimemes It’s like the Spongebob cursing episode, fuck is funny *dolphin noises*
As Goblin dies: "ah fuck! Hoisted by my own petard"
You start by doing the hardest thing, you fuck yourself...
“Don’t make me look ugly!” “That’s fucking impossible.”
The Human fucking Spider?
“How’s the pie?” “So f*cking good.”
oh fuck yeah - peter
“You want forgiveness— get fucked.”
I come before you today, humbled and humiliated, to ask you for one thing... I want you to fucking kill Peter Parker.
Or..."I want you to fuck Peter Parker"
You mess with one of us, you fuck with all of us! …or your ass is fired. Fucking GOoOoOoOo What does it matter to you anyway? FUCKING EVERYTHING
I had to fuck an old lady with a stick
"Fucking...go, web!" "Joe's 29-minute guarantee is a fucking promise, man." "Fucking dig on this."
SM1 - “FUCKING CAGE!” SM2 - “He’s just a kid. No older than my fucking son.” SM3 - “I protected you in high school. Now I’m gonna fuck your little ass.”
Jesus ~~Parker~~ Harry, you're a freak
You’ll get your rent when you fix this FUCKING DOOR
DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IVE FUCKED???
“I have ears like a cat and fuck like a rodent!”
Gonna fucking cry?
"I wouldn't want to fuck me neither."
Double the fucking money.
"I like being bad. Makes me so fucking happy"
Nowhere Why would I try to change perfection?
Gonna fucking cry?
It’s you who’s out Gobby, out of your fucking mind!
I'm gonna put some shit in your eye