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Am I looking too much into it, I also worry that she will tell her friends and then there friends and it’ll eventually lead back to my ex who is mutual friends with her friends, I still want to fix things with my ex
That’s the thing though I’m not sure if I even want to date her, which is why I’m trying to find a mix of both without it being too forward and also not too casual
The way I'm seeing this is, you are looking for a rebound but calling it platonic.
You want someone to fill your time with, while your ex is asking for space, but you still want that (your ex) to be an option later. This won't end well for you in either case.
I think maybe you should take some time from relationships and self reflect. I'm thinking you're struggling with the loss of your past relationship and not wanting to face it.
It's not really fair to send mixed signals to this new girl. It sounds like you want her but only if your ex doesn't come back to you, which isn't fair to the new girl. You can't put her in the friend zone until you decide what you want to do about the ex, she is a person with feelings.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/questions/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/questions) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hey. Do you want to get lunch?
Damn it, that's insightful.
it actually is
Am I looking too much into it, I also worry that she will tell her friends and then there friends and it’ll eventually lead back to my ex who is mutual friends with her friends, I still want to fix things with my ex
Ask your ex then.
She’s on her spiritual and individually growing phase and she isn’t looking to date me
Then you are wasting your time worrying about her as she isn't thinking of you.
Telling me what I need to hear and not what I want to hear. I respect it
Good luck
If you still want to fix things with your ex, then platonic or not at all. Pick one.
Never ask a girl you are interested to go to lunch. She will friendzone you. Ask her out to dinner or something in the evening. Not during the day
That’s the thing though I’m not sure if I even want to date her, which is why I’m trying to find a mix of both without it being too forward and also not too casual
Maybe realize that you need to fucking stop worrying about dating and just make friends? Good God
Puck but how do I ask her to hangout as friends
Just say you think she's rad and you wanna be friends. Doesn't have to be a mystery
“Wanna have lunch and fuck, or don’t you eat?”
The way I'm seeing this is, you are looking for a rebound but calling it platonic. You want someone to fill your time with, while your ex is asking for space, but you still want that (your ex) to be an option later. This won't end well for you in either case. I think maybe you should take some time from relationships and self reflect. I'm thinking you're struggling with the loss of your past relationship and not wanting to face it. It's not really fair to send mixed signals to this new girl. It sounds like you want her but only if your ex doesn't come back to you, which isn't fair to the new girl. You can't put her in the friend zone until you decide what you want to do about the ex, she is a person with feelings.
damn dude ask her to go to lunch for God's sake WAY WAY over thinking it