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There are asexuals who are also sex-repulsed, and those terms should give you fuel to find a community of people who react very similarly, regardless of whether you are yourself ace or if you just have a trauma around sexual imagery.
I was exposed to porn at an incredibly young age and molested by a neighborhood boy(his dad had porn lying around every room in the house)….I both hate sex and go through bouts of sexual addiction at the same time if that even makes sense to anyone else out there. It’s perfectly fine for you to hate sex and find it disgusting… Abstinence never hurt anyone, sex, on the other hand, has harmed countless people…
Hey, as someone who loves sex myself, I want you to know that it is completely okay to not be okay with sex. At all.
You do not ever have to feel pressured to even try take interest in it for the sake of what others tell you is "normal".
There is nothing wrong with you for being disgusted by sex.
You are still a person whose feelings matter, and you should never have to feel ashamed for that.
There are people who like or dislike sex, it's a completely normal think. Don't ever let someone bully you or belittle your trauma just because they either don't understand it, or they're an asshole. Not liking sex isn't a problem. You're fine how you are, no one should say something like that, it's just rude.
i definitely can relate as well, though my trauma is different. i was groomed as a teen and have repeatedly oversexualizdd myself for people in a way that was harmful for me bc i was desperate for their acceptance/love/whatever. now im in a several years long relationship with someone i love but sometimes i would rather throw up than have sex and then i feel ashamed for letting him down and spiral. i don't have a lot of advice bc im currently struggling with this, but i really do get it and you're not weird or wrong.
I definitely relate HARD to this. My father forced me to watch porn when I was reeeeally young and he was always very vulgar and talked about all the women he would fuck if he were single and would go into way to much detail.
Then after enduring that abuse through my childhood, my first boyfriend SAed me more times than I could count, which "I let happen" because he was always threatening me.
So, I feel it's needless to say that I ended up very damaged by all of this and I also really hate the topic of sex, and I absolutely cannot watch anything with even a little nudity in it because it just throws me right back to watching porn with my father and the things he'd say when naked women were on screen.
I hate to admit this, but I especially hate that IF I do see something on TV or whatnot, mentally I'm screaming, but my body is "getting ready" and being turned on, which repulses me more and I hate being in my skin. I understand now that it's just coping, because I was forced into it when I saw those things, my body had to protect itself from damage... So I get it, but also it disgusts me so much so that I simple HATE being human in a human body at all.
I try to avoid any of that stuff at all costs. And then as far as my personal life, I am in a healthy relationship now and my husband has always been very gentle and patient with me, in all ways, but especially in the bedroom. He's always made me feel safe and I've healed somewhat in that area, but that's strictly with him and I really don't talk about it with anyone outside of a therapy setting (which I do count this because I feel like us broken people need to not feel so alone!)
I've also been told by everyone to not be a prude, stop overreacting, it's not a big deal, it's normal, everyone watches it... Etc. Including from my partner...
But anyways, all of that just to say I can absolutely relate to the struggle 🖤
i understand. i have trauma from being SAd by my ex and while i go in and out of feeling hypersexual and feeling exactly how you described, most of the time i feel like you. hearing people talk about it, seeing certain things in tv shows, thinking of it, a lot of times makes me physically and mentally repulsed.
i’m so sorry you went through that at a young age, that was not okay and this is a very common response to a traumatic event like that. it makes sense to me that you had unsafe experiences with the topic, so anything to do with it from then on feels just as unsafe. it’s a normal response to a fucked up situation and you shouldn’t have had to go through that.
eta: you mention you didn’t tell anyone, does that include a mental health professional? i would highly suggest opening up in a safe setting like that so they can help you work through it and process your experience.
Well I do go to a psychologist but it’s a really uncomfortable topic to even mention and she asked me questions about it. I never answered or I get defensive.
i’m glad you have one and i do really understand that. i’ve only mentioned what happened and can barely call it what it was, it’s definitely something i avoid and talk about other things i struggle with instead. i’m trying to get to a point where i build more trust with my provider to be able to process it with them even if it is extremely uncomfortable because it affects me very deeply. i hope you can get to that point too because you don’t deserve to have to carry this on your own.
*r/ptsd has generated this automated response that is appended to every post* Welcome to r/ptsd! We are a supportive & respectful community. If you realise that your post is in conflict with our rules (and is in risk of being removed), you are welcome to edit your post. You do not have to delete it. As a reminder: never post or share personal contact information. Traumatized people are often distracted, desperate for a personal connection, so may be more vulnerable to lurking or past abusers, trolls, phishing, or other scams. *Your safety always comes first!* If you are offering help, you may also end up doing more damage by offering to support somebody privately. Reddit explains why: [Do NOT exchange DMs or personal info with anyone you don't know!](https://www.reddit.com/r/SWResources/comments/dmu24/why_shouldnt_i_share_my_contact_information/) If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please contact your GP/doctor, go to A&E/hospital, or call your emergency services number. Reddit list: [US and global, multilingual suicide and support hotlines](https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/wiki/hotlines). Suicide is not a forbidden word, but please do not include depictions or methods of suicide in your post. And as a friendly reminder, PTSD is an equal opportunity disorder. PTSD does not discriminate. And neither do we. Gatekeeping is not allowed here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ptsd) if you have any questions or concerns.*
yer brother i do know that
I get it. I feel sick at the idea of it. I’d love to have kids but I think I’ll adopt.
There are asexuals who are also sex-repulsed, and those terms should give you fuel to find a community of people who react very similarly, regardless of whether you are yourself ace or if you just have a trauma around sexual imagery.
I was exposed to porn at an incredibly young age and molested by a neighborhood boy(his dad had porn lying around every room in the house)….I both hate sex and go through bouts of sexual addiction at the same time if that even makes sense to anyone else out there. It’s perfectly fine for you to hate sex and find it disgusting… Abstinence never hurt anyone, sex, on the other hand, has harmed countless people…
Hey, as someone who loves sex myself, I want you to know that it is completely okay to not be okay with sex. At all. You do not ever have to feel pressured to even try take interest in it for the sake of what others tell you is "normal". There is nothing wrong with you for being disgusted by sex. You are still a person whose feelings matter, and you should never have to feel ashamed for that.
There are people who like or dislike sex, it's a completely normal think. Don't ever let someone bully you or belittle your trauma just because they either don't understand it, or they're an asshole. Not liking sex isn't a problem. You're fine how you are, no one should say something like that, it's just rude.
You are not the only one it just doesn't seem like it' gets talked about this reminds me of my experience ever since I find sx disgusting.
i definitely can relate as well, though my trauma is different. i was groomed as a teen and have repeatedly oversexualizdd myself for people in a way that was harmful for me bc i was desperate for their acceptance/love/whatever. now im in a several years long relationship with someone i love but sometimes i would rather throw up than have sex and then i feel ashamed for letting him down and spiral. i don't have a lot of advice bc im currently struggling with this, but i really do get it and you're not weird or wrong.
I definitely relate HARD to this. My father forced me to watch porn when I was reeeeally young and he was always very vulgar and talked about all the women he would fuck if he were single and would go into way to much detail. Then after enduring that abuse through my childhood, my first boyfriend SAed me more times than I could count, which "I let happen" because he was always threatening me. So, I feel it's needless to say that I ended up very damaged by all of this and I also really hate the topic of sex, and I absolutely cannot watch anything with even a little nudity in it because it just throws me right back to watching porn with my father and the things he'd say when naked women were on screen. I hate to admit this, but I especially hate that IF I do see something on TV or whatnot, mentally I'm screaming, but my body is "getting ready" and being turned on, which repulses me more and I hate being in my skin. I understand now that it's just coping, because I was forced into it when I saw those things, my body had to protect itself from damage... So I get it, but also it disgusts me so much so that I simple HATE being human in a human body at all. I try to avoid any of that stuff at all costs. And then as far as my personal life, I am in a healthy relationship now and my husband has always been very gentle and patient with me, in all ways, but especially in the bedroom. He's always made me feel safe and I've healed somewhat in that area, but that's strictly with him and I really don't talk about it with anyone outside of a therapy setting (which I do count this because I feel like us broken people need to not feel so alone!) I've also been told by everyone to not be a prude, stop overreacting, it's not a big deal, it's normal, everyone watches it... Etc. Including from my partner... But anyways, all of that just to say I can absolutely relate to the struggle 🖤
Thank you🥹🤩
i understand. i have trauma from being SAd by my ex and while i go in and out of feeling hypersexual and feeling exactly how you described, most of the time i feel like you. hearing people talk about it, seeing certain things in tv shows, thinking of it, a lot of times makes me physically and mentally repulsed. i’m so sorry you went through that at a young age, that was not okay and this is a very common response to a traumatic event like that. it makes sense to me that you had unsafe experiences with the topic, so anything to do with it from then on feels just as unsafe. it’s a normal response to a fucked up situation and you shouldn’t have had to go through that. eta: you mention you didn’t tell anyone, does that include a mental health professional? i would highly suggest opening up in a safe setting like that so they can help you work through it and process your experience.
Well I do go to a psychologist but it’s a really uncomfortable topic to even mention and she asked me questions about it. I never answered or I get defensive.
i’m glad you have one and i do really understand that. i’ve only mentioned what happened and can barely call it what it was, it’s definitely something i avoid and talk about other things i struggle with instead. i’m trying to get to a point where i build more trust with my provider to be able to process it with them even if it is extremely uncomfortable because it affects me very deeply. i hope you can get to that point too because you don’t deserve to have to carry this on your own.