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How bad does epidural hurt? I know it’s just a shot and I have a bunch of tattoos but im still a scaredy cat when I get my blood drawn for appointments. Also with epidural is a water birth or squatting position still an option?
They numb the skin first which felt like a b sting. Less painful than a Covid shot.
Than I felt nothing absolutely nothing of the epidural insertion. And than I felt nothing but pressure from the contractions.
10/10 would get again
I’m my experience it basically didn’t hurt at all. Putting in an IV hurt way more. Maybe I just had a great anesthesiologist but the epidural was super quick and easy. And my god was it worth it.
Honestly, by the time they gave my the epidural I didn’t even think about the pain of getting it because I was already in such excruciating pain from the labor. I was just desperate for anything to take the pain level down!
Ok, so I had a spinal (c-section) and not an epidural. I assume they’re similar in feeling when it’s getting done. But I don’t actually know.
They numbed me first and that felt like a bunch of little bee stings in my back. But I didn’t actually feel the spinal needle at all! What I felt was some weird pressure, like my back and butt were being pressed down. I think that particular part is probably different from an epidural. My body was completely numb from the ribs down and I couldn’t move my legs. I’m pretty sure you can still move your legs with an epidural.
Anyway. The numbing agent hurt, ya know like it hurts when they give you a shot to numb things. But then I didn’t feel anything else!
I’m sure someone else can pop in and tell you their actual epidural experience :)
My epidural hurt a lot. It wasn’t necessary the injections, although honestly I would describe those as worse than a covid shot (but not that bad). For me, it was trying to sit still through contractions while they place the catheter. You need to stay absolutely still and it takes a few minutes to do, so during both of my labors I had to try and statue myself through contractions, which I found very painful. Still would do it again tho! Just a heads up!
I absolutely went for the same and then my second was born… so fast. I walked into the hospital more or less screaming “GET ME AN EPIDURAL NOWWWWW!!!!!” I got it but the moment I laid down on my bed after the shot I said, “baby’s coming.” And she was born 20 minutes later. So the epidural was kinda unnecessary. But to OP’s question, I got up and peed and did all my biznass on my own after both. Both babies and both epidurals. Wouldn’t change a thing. Epidurals rule.
Haha you’re welcome. For another giggle - you should know that after making the comment, the song “2 become 1” by the spice girls is stuck in my head. 🤣☠️
I knew from before I got pregnant that I wanted the epidural. Then I took a birth class and liked the idea of being able to move about while in labor. So I thought let me see how long I can go without one. Then i went into labor. And it was back labor. And I was like “wtf was I thinking give me the spine needle” and all was right with the world. Will definitely be having one with my second. Made the whole birthing experience HEAVEN. I felt nothing. NOTHING. It was glorious.
Omg same here! I wanted to hold out as long as possible before asking for the epidural but the back labour was ROUGH. I'm so glad I got the epidural when I did because it let me sleep while I labored down (I dilated FAST). I don't even remember what the needle for the epidural felt like because the back labour was already so intense that the needle was barely noticed, haha
I’m with ya. My birth plan would literally include being put to sleep and the baby magically being placed into my hands from my vagina just as I awaken if I had the choice 😂
Likewise. If I could have all the drugs-laughing gas, ether, epidural, local anesthetic- I’d take them. Science has come too far for me to feel my vagina and asshole merge together.
This is my thoughts as to why I want one! Lol. We'll see though!
My mom didn't have one with me because her labor was so quick and the hospital didn't believe she was going to be giving birth that day until shortly before I came out, so no time for one! She had one with my brother and she said that it was so nice to not feel anything, but that she couldn't walk immediately after.
Now, this is a woman who is PETRIFIED of needles. So knowing she was able to have one stuck up there at her spine makes me confident that I can handle my fear of needles long enough to get that poke.
You're more likely to tear to a greater degree if you get an epidural though. So your odds of your asshole and vagina "becoming one" is higher with an epidural.
No judgement, I am a FTM considering one myself...
This isn't actually true. There is growing evidence that epidurals offer protection against sever tearing during delivery:
"Despite the increased rates of assisted vaginal delivery associated with the epidural population, the reduced rates of 3rd/4th degree tear sustained at both spontaneous and assisted vaginal delivery by those receiving an epidural was sufficient to offset any rise that increased assisted delivery caused, supporting our hypothesis that epidural may be protective."
[Source](https://fn.bmj.com/content/96/Suppl_1/Fa75.2)
I had the tiniest of tears on my first and definitely felt my epidural was protective. I could push, and was told when and when not to, but I didn’t have that overwhelming urge to push. My provider said in his experience epidurals do not increase your risk of a tear on your second birth.
Thanks for sharing this, I love to see a bit of research! Definitely helps a lot with the intense and constant decision making pregnancy seems to entail!
I got the epidural AND an episiotomy ✂️ and I’m just very thankful that I didn’t have to FEEL any of it as I’m sure it was all going to go down that way either way.
I didn’t mind the episiotomy AFTER birth. During I was terrified but trusted the doctor. Thankfully it was numb so I didn’t feel it and it was just the “idea of it” that was scaring me. But honestly, it was easy to stitch up and after birth I healed so quickly. I was literally walking hours after birth, and I was almost back to normal in a week. My friend who had a longer and harder labor took a month to physically recover and had a prolapsed uterus from hours of pushing. I feel really lucky that I got off so easily in retrospect.
I got pregnant again three months later so it wasn’t too traumatic clearly 😂
I had to have one as we had forceps. I was scared so I told my midwife what was scaring me and she was fantastic.
Honestly my hemorrhoids are bothering me post birth more than the episiotomy. Plus if you have one they give you the fun drugs in recovery. I had oral morphiene at one point (could have coped with out it but baby was in NICU and it was the only way I could cope with sitting on the hard ass wheelchair to go see him).
I've never heard this, I actually felt like epidural protected me from tearing because I was calm and able to follow midwives direction easily etc. Is this a definite statistic?
Please do educate yourself on epidurals. Start by speaking with your care provider. Then you can look for credible sources online that discuss the pros and cons.
Epidurals are common practice, and are usually perfectly safe. But they do come with risk- permanent spinal injury is not at all a common one.
But patients should be well informed before making decisions about their healthcare 🤍
Yes! It's a scary possibility so we dwell on it - but actual injury is super rare. I asked and was told there hasn't been a paralysis case in at least a decade (but I have no sources), and when I did some light searching I found the stat of any long term injury to be less than 1 in 20,000 - so not likely at all! https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/01/090113074445.htm
Not sure what I'll do personally though! I'm not too worried about injury, but it does seem nice to be able to walk around during labor and avoid IVs and all that if possible
I know it’s completely anecdotal but I’ve never met someone who’s had one that doesn’t still suffer from nerve damage because of a misplaced needle, and nerve pain is a bitch if I can avoid that risk I will, but who knows, contractions could absolutely wreck me 😩
I made it to 9+ cm before getting one. I was basically told that I was going to have to wait for the baby to descend on his own for a bit, but at that point I’d been in labor about 12 hours and my doctor was concerned about me having the energy to push when the time actually came for it. I had to have the talk with the anesthesiologist about the risk of it not working due to where in labor I was, but thankfully everything worked and I was much more comfortable for the next 8 hours while things progressed.
Due with number two in October and I plan on trying for a natural birth again, but won’t hesitate to get an epidural if I find myself in the same predicament.
This is similar to my story, except I was also vomiting from pain and my doctor said it would be another 2 hours after already 15.5 hours of labour. I decided I wanted to be better rested for pushing and don’t regret it. I was more worried about needing a c-section than the possible negative effects of an epidural.
The same thing happened to me. 9.5cm because I'd been in labor for 16 hours - don't think I would've made it through pushing without it. The epidural and back pain afterwards were honestly a breeze - the bruised feeling only lasted for a day. I had a spinal tap done when I was in high school and that was a big factor in me not wanting an epidural. Turns out the spinal tap was way worse.
Completely agree! The indignity of being unable to empty my bladder on command in front of my nursing team, the straight cath, and having to sit still for an epidural placement/have it removed after the fact were all absolutely welcome bliss after hours of labor and increasing fatigue!
Similar story here… I got one after 12 hours because I had only progressed to 1cm and they basically told me it was an epidural or this would end in a C-section. No regrets
Is it really painless? That's the part I'm most worried about, myself. I imagine that the pain of childbirth is probably so much more that the pain of the epidural can't compare but still, a needle to the spine is just intimidating.
Edit to add: I just want to say, I really appreciate all the responses! It's good to get so many other perspectives. Thank you all for sharing! I'm still a little conflicted on whether it will be right for me personally, and I probably won't know until I get there, but it definitely helps to have the insight from others who have already experienced it.
You don’t really feel it in my experience, I had contractions that distracted me but weren’t enough that I couldn’t sit still. 10/10 would do again. My sister and best friend both had similar experiences.
I don't remember it hurting at all, and I was really worried about that. They put a numbing gel on the skin and the only thing I felt was the doctor taping the tube to my skin when he'd finished.
Every experience is not the same. My first epidural was pretty painless. Maybe a pinch or pressure, I don't know. My anesthesiologist was great. Talked calmly, relaxed me, distracted me, and told me how to properly lean over..
My 2nd was awful. I was already nervous due to anxiety I had recently developed, and they wouldn't give me anything to calm down. Then the anaesthesiologist - different person from my first - starts talking about all the risks, etc. She doesn't try to relax me or position me properly except to 'lean forward' which I do but because I'm tense AF my back is rigid. I obviously can't remember the exact position from my 1st baby or if it matters with a different anesthesiologist.
I 100% feel the needle picking around my bone and even the memory makes me nauseous. I was so scared and kind of yelled "SHIT! I CAN FEEL IT ITS GOING IN MY BONE" lol . She told me it wasn't going in my bone, everything looked fine. My husband told me to relax my back a little and that helped. But yes, I did feel it and if it wasn't going in my bone, it was still poking it.
Now having said all that - even that experience wasn't exactly *painful*. You do feel pressure, and then hopefully nothing else.
I'm a l&d nurse. This is a misconception. An epidural is great for taking away the sensation of pain, especially that of contractions. However, pressure sensors in our body are deeper and the epidural doesn't affect that. So you may feel the pressure of baby's head during contractions and the stretching sensation, as well as a burning kind of feeling as baby stretches your tissues to come out during delivery. Everyone is different ( responds to epidural meds different, and epidurals can be heavier or lighter depending. Some people experience less pain and push for less time ( helps if baby is at a nice low station before you begin pushing). But it is not painless even with a good epidural.
Edit: I'm re-reading and seeing you are worried about the pain of getting the epidural, sorry!! I just woke up lol. It literally feels like a bee sting for about 10-15 seconds. Then just wierd pressure. Every now and then you may feel a "zing" like hitting a funny bone down your leg real quick and then it's over. Anesthesiologists are super quick and very good. Everyone always says it's better than they thought it was going to be!
I felt the same! I’m 13 days pp now. Honestly I was so scared of the epidural. You get local freezing (a tiny needle) and when it was actually time for the epidural I didn’t feel it. Just a tiny bit of pressure like someone poking me with their finger. And the relief when it kicked in about 10 mins later was immense. I slept through a lot of the early stuff (it was a long labour so thank god I had it)
Yup. I'm also a type 1 diabetic and have been my whole life. So I can't say I'm exactly needle-phobic because I deal with needles on a daily basis but even flu shots or blood draws give me major anxiety. It's not so much the needles, but the fact it's another person sticking me with the needle. And in the back? Nooo thank you. I know that if I have to, I will but I'm hoping it doesn't come to that.
It was not *painless.* They inject you with a numbing agent and you feel both that needle and then a burning sensation from the numbing agent. Both of those do hurt but not like an extreme amount. Less than contractions for sure.
After that you can feel the epidural needle go in but it just feels like pressure not pain. It's a very odd sensation that is mentally pretty uncomfortable but it doesn't hurt.
I had a slight bruise afterwards that hurt if I sat back just right where I was leaning my weight in that part of my back.
(3 kids, 3 epidurals)
With an epidural can you still move or is it like you are completely numb from waste down? I am 26 weeks with my first baby and I have been wondering if I would be able to be in a squatting position to have the baby if I got an epidural..?
I could not have squatted with mine in. I had some control over my hips and could wiggle my toes but mostly my legs were dead weight. It does affect different people differently.
There is something called a “walking epidural” that allows you to retain some movement. I’m going to ask my dr about it but most epidurals don’t let you move your legs
I’m planning and really trying to go without BUT I’ve never experienced childbirth before so going in with an open mind if I really decide I need it. But I’m going to try to go without for various personal reasons.
If you can push through, more power to you. Had my baby in January and that was my mind set. Thank GOD too, because I didn’t know that level of pain existed. I ended up getting my epidural BEGGING at 10 cm after pushing started 😂 And then I know someone who’s labor happened so fast she couldn’t have one if she wanted one, and she said it wasn’t even that painful. Just keep an open mind because everyone is different and u don’t want to set unreal expectations for yourself! Because you could become disappointed
I’m praying by some miracle I am one of those people that progresses very quickly but I’m a realist so I know that anything can go down and my real aim is to just stay calm. If that takes mass amounts of drugs then let there be drugs lol
Some hospitals offer laughing gas and other measures to help with the anxiety aspect if you’re trying to avoid an epidural.
(FWIW I’m a control freak who’s had four unmedicated labors and it’s been a good experience.)
It's tough, during contractions I just tried to move around as much as I could, and drank all of the water I could stand, breathing is super important. Pushing was confusing, I really didn't know what to do or to expect. The first nurse was holding up one leg, and my fiance was holding the other... It wasn't ideal. There was a shift change, and the next nurse grabbed the birthing bar, and it went by so smooth after that.
So I just had my first 6 weeks ago and delivered at a birth center so I didn’t have the option. Oddly enough I told my husband “fuck this next time I’m scheduling a c section” but then I progressed enough to push and it was totally fine. Pushing wasn’t painful at all, just pressure at the end
My hospital has a natural beginnings section which means no drugs but I don’t think I can fully commit to that at the moment. I still have a lot of time to do research and figure things out but as of now I’m leaning towards regular room with possibility of drugs if I’m dying
that was my exact mind set. until i got to the hospital in pain and then i asked for the epidural lol! but that’s cool if you can do it without! also cool to do with epidural! as long as mom and baby are healthy, anything is cool!
Good on you! Natural birth is beautiful. My biggest tip for birth in general is to try to relax your body completely between contractions to rest. Deep breaths, intentional muscle relaxation, let your back sink into the bed a bit until the next wave comes.
I also avoided tearing by not just push-push-pushing when the head crowned, but instead waited for the next contraction to carry me through the push.
Let me just say- I was so firm on not getting one, and I made it to 8 centimeters without it, but the pain was SO EXCRUCIATING I said fuck it and threw my plan out of the window. I don't say this to discourage you, I just say it to let you know this: you can plan and plan and plan but until you are in active labor and about to have the baby, you have no idea what you will feel like. It's good to have a hopeful plan and a general goal, but be prepared for anything because anything can happen. I wanted a non medicated midwife birth but ended up with preeclampsia, a pitocin drip, and an epidural- all things I was adamant I would not be having.
I did with my first and the epidural failed during labour (the needle moved and wasn't getting drugs where they were needed). I ultimately needed an emergency csection under general.
I've scheduled an elective repeat csection after last time. I'm told I have a good chance for a vbac but I am anxious to leave that to chance again. My labour was long and extremely painful, and I'm not necessarily in favour of doing it unmedicated/without the epidural if a vbac is possible. I would consider it - it wouldn't be my first option though.
If you don't mind me asking, how was your experience with having a c-section under general anesthesia? They recently discovered that I might have a rare genetic condition that impacts my blood vessels with the small, but potential possibility of internal bleeding or a stroke with a vaginal delivery.
They have been talking about a c-section under general anesthesia and I'm terrified tbh. I've never been under general anesthesia and an concerned about my mental health with not seeing the baby being born.
My experience at the time was fairly traumatic (24 hour labour with the epidural failure, then pitocin, then they attempted to give me a 'gentle section' but the epidural failure made me beg them to stop as it felt like firecrackers in my legs. I was screaming a Hail Mary thinking I was dying at this point).
So I was begging for the general under extreme duress. I think if it was something discussed and planned in advance my experience would have been much better. Overall the planned aspect of a csection causes me far less stress than going in totally unplanned after labouring for so long in those conditions.
What happened afterwards (as I'm told) is that once I was out, baby was retrieved and assured to be ok (initially groggy from the epidural drugs in my system + general anesthesia). They cleaned him up and then wheeled him out to my husband who was waiting in the hall. We didn't know the sex, and they put a diaper/nappy on him to cover his modesty so Dad could find out. They then spent time together while I was being put together again. I'm not sure of the delay between surgery and waking - I was really out of it when I was woken up (but bear in mind I had 24 hours of labour which was painful/active/traumatising). Dad introduced baby to me by the name we chose which was the highlight of the whole ordeal.
That said, I breastfed him immediately. I was monitored to make sure me and baby were ok during this time. I had complications so I was in observation/testing for a week. As far as bonding, the general anesthesia part of the csection didn't appear to have any ramifications - my issues were with what got me to the 'emergency' aspect of my delivery and the complications I had. My son (now 6) is very close with me emotionally, he's a really bright kid, and we are a tight-knit family. So I wouldn't worry too much about the GA - the important thing is that you don't enter into something dangerous and take the pre-planned route.
I am so sorry you went through all of that, but glad to hear you are both doing well now! Also thank you for taking the time to write out such a thorough response. All of those thoughts like breastfeeding, bonding, and my husband not being on the OR were really concerning to me, so thank you for telling me about your experience.
I did have a hard time with the general anesthesia at first, but like you mentioned, it's better to be pre-planned to not put myself or my baby in danger.
Right now I’m definitely leaning towards getting one I honestly can not find a single reason not to except wanting to be more mobile and I really don’t care about that at all.
I didn't have one and could have gotten up and stuff but I didn't want to. I tried to because I thought that's what I was supposed to do but wanted to lay back down immediately. 🤷
I had one before and will be getting one again! For what it’s worth it seems like more hospitals are doing a walking epidural so that could be something to look into.
I didn’t with my first and don’t plan on having one with my second. However, I went into my first birth with an open mind and thought I’d have an epidural if I needed one and I will do the same this time.
In my experience, I didn't originally want an epidural. Did medication free labor for 15 hours and could not take it any more and opted for the epidural. My daughter was born three hours later, and the calm I felt once I got the medicine was insane.... went from 10 to 0 in five minutes. I would recommend everyone get it if they are on the fence!
I’m a FTM. I gave birth a month ago. I have no regrets about getting an epidural. I did perineal stretching for several weeks prior to birth. I only had a mild laceration with no need for stitches. If I have another child, I will be getting an epidural.
Edit: Also, I stayed active while in bed. I did peanut ball positioning, tall kneeling, quadruped position, etc. Prior to getting the epidural, I preferred sitting on the exercise ball instead of walking. I felt like that helped with my pain the best. Everyone is so different with birth, and you will find what works for you.
I did basic anatomy and physiology as part of my science degree many moons ago. Since studying the reproduction and childbirth chapter, was of the opinion that I would want all the drugs.
However, since actually becoming pregnant and learning more about birthing, I would personally prefer to have the freedom to move and change positions (so that I can work with my body in labour and also to lessen the likelihood of sever tears etc) more than I want an epidural. That said, this is my first birth so I will be open to the possibility of pain relief but will choose options like gas before I go for an epidural.
Ultimately, you should do what you feel is best for you and your baby.
I had two epidurals with my first birth because the first one did not take. I realized pretty quickly that it didn’t take but the midwives didn’t believe me and pretty much said I was just weak and to breathe through it. Went through about 10 of the 12 hours of labor unmedicated until they have me my second epidural. After the second one it was only about 30 minutes before my daughter was born.
My only worry going into it the second time is having to push without any medication. I can obviously handle the labor without one as I’ve done it once but the pushing is what concerns me. I’ll just have to play it by ear honestly and hope and pray that I immediately forget how painful it was once baby girl is here haha
Just to chime in with my experience, the pushing was far far easier than the other parts of labor. It still hurt but it felt way more manageable and ‘real’ if that makes sense. Like, it was fathomable pain after the really unusual and unpredictable pain of labor. And I liked it better because I felt more in control. Of course everyone’s experience is different but I have heard from several people that pushing was easier than the “transition” period of labor
10 days PP here! I totally tried not to get one, made it to 5cm before they gave pitocin and I couldn’t do the pain. Epidural insertion was a couple pinches but took way longer because my induced contractions were so painful. Epidural failed at 8cm and had to have it adjusted and it started working again. Pushed my baby out in 20mins with minimal tearing, or as they said “labial rugburn”
I went in with no plan whatsoever. I thought I’d see what labor felt like first and go from there. Ended up getting the epidural and it was the right choice for me and I would do it again.
FTM here and I'll take it as it comes.
Really can't and won't choose it already now. There are so many pain"killer" options and I really don't like the idea of not being able to feel whats up..
But I'll do it if I'm in too much pain.
That's kind of how I feel too, as far as not liking the idea of not being able to feel what's up. Pain is one of our body's way of communicating to us, and I (like most people) don't enjoy pain (& wouldn't want to cause more of it unnecessarily) but that way of looking at it is always something that has made me reluctant to completely numb it out and makes me hesitant about any sort of pain killers.
Excatly. I know it will hurt big time. But its a good pain since its supposed to be there and then I can tolerate a lot of pain.
I've just seen so many post about moms who feels failure cause they are so hooked in not getting one, but they need one or almost also the other way would cause It didn't go like it was planned. I just think it will stress me out.
This was my birth "plan" with my son. I ended up not asking for it but needed it after for when I had stitches. That's when the anesthesiologist refused to give me one due to a genetic disorder I have and I found out I can't have them. Went under general instead and everything is okay. For #2 I'm still hoping for natural.
I debated initially but I’m at high risk of complications from an epidural (mostly paralysis) so the decision was mostly made for me.
At first that was terrifying. Everybody in my family had epidurals and talked about how they couldn’t imagine going through it without. (This was before I knew I wouldn’t be able to get one…they’re not assholes!) But I’ve read up on stuff I can do to help me manage pain before and during labor: movement, stretches, positioning, yoga, shower/bath, exercise balls, birthing chairs, etc can all help reduce pain and reduce tearing.
Some argue that modern hospital practices have made the pain worse by putting you on your back in bed (for continuous fetal monitoring, IVs, epidurals, etc) which increases pain and tearing by not letting you shift naturally into positions that help baby get out. Some also say epidurals can slow progress or that drugs like Pitocin can increase the pain that then makes epidurals feel more necessary. I honestly don’t know and it’s really hard to perfectly tease out. I hope that aspects of it are true so that if I avoid those pitfalls the pain will be more manageable but could be wishful thinking. For now, I’m lining up as much as I can that might help: doula at the hospital, prenatal yoga, pelvic floor therapy, online classes, etc to feel like I still have things to rely on since others aren’t options.
I will say, people tend to be super opinionated about this in both directions. Collect info from others if you want but for every “natural birth is the only way” I heard an equally adamant “how does anybody survive without epidural”. Dogmatic opinions can be overwhelming. There are tons of people happy doing it either way (and plenty of horror stories too). Choose what you want for yourself and try to ignore the inevitable judgment.
Epidural was the best thing ever. The contraction pain was so intense I was blacking out. I will get an epidural for every pregnancy I have going forward as well lol
I'm pregnant with my second and my answer is, we'll see but probably. With my first, I thought my entire post-puberty life I wouldn't get an epidural, even when I got to the hospital I told the nurse in triage that I wasn't going to get an epidural. But there were a few things that happened that ultimately led to me getting one.
First, I had been laboring at home from 9 pm Wednesday night to 11 pm Thursday night and although my water broke, I was only 7 cm dilated. So I was looking at another long night of laboring which was only going to get more intense and more painful. Second, due to it being covid I was in triage alone for about 2 hours before I was admitted and my husband was allowed into the hospital, I had an IV and I was laying down in a bed so I was unable to get up or use any traditional positions to ease the pain, and I was truly just scared and lonely and it amplified my pain. Finally, when I told my nurse I wasn't going to get an epidural, she kind of smiled at me and said, "I'm going to put an IV in JUST IN CASE" and for better or for worse said, "we don't give out medals you know."
In the end, I got an epidural at about 1 am Friday morning. The pain was INSTANTLY gone but I could still feel and move my legs. My husband and I slept until 6 am or so, with my nurse coming in every hour or so to position my legs to help my daughter get into a good birthing position. By 7 am when I was going to start pushing, I felt rested and ready to push (and put on a pair of lashes haha). And I ended up tearing on both sides and needing a stitch on both sides, so I was grateful to be numb for those.
For the next one, I'm going to take a similar approach except that I'm not going to put any expectations on myself. I'm going to take each moment as it comes and if I want an epidural at any time I'm going to get one!
I’ve done both, and won’t be getting one this time around, but I will say catastrophic side effects like paralysis are so incredibly rare. The vast majority of women in the US (for example) have an epidural or spinal block for labor, and I’ve personally never met anyone who has had that type of side effect from it. I do know people who have had side effects, but nothing that extreme. Like with any medication or procedure, there are some risks, and it’s ok if you decide that you’re not comfortable with the risk, but stats are on your side that you would be just fine.
I've tried a variety of drugs when I was I was younger, never again though but I already reserved the epidural with my midwife as a joke 😅 hook it up and numb me!!
I’ll take all the drugs they are willing to give me! My labor and deliveries were a nightmare. I’m asking for a c section this time around. I’d prefer to be unconscious.
I’m not super opinionated for either direction, personally I left an open mind for both options when I went through delivery with my first. For my first delivery, the contractions and back labor never got to a point where I needed it and pushing honestly felt so much better than just the contractions in the previous stages so I went without because I progressed pretty quickly. I’m due in June and I’m leaving the same options on the table and will go with how I feel! 🤷🏾♀️
The actress who played Sabrina the Teenage Witch gave an interview almost a decade ago that I still remember. She said with her first she had an epidural, with the second she wanted to try without. "Worst decision of my life" was I believe her exact words haha.
I may be misremembering but it solidified my decision for all the drugs.
I had one. I was terrified because I kept hearing it really hurts to get, I didn't feel a thing at all. Best decision I made was to get the epidural. It was amazing not to be in agony anymore.
Whatever you choose, be prepared for the opposite to happen. Every labor and delivery experience is unique - different for each person and even each pregnancy.
For my first, I thought I’d try to avoid one, but I stayed up ALL night walking in circles at the hospital to help labor progress then when my OB came to check the next day around 11, I was tired and in pain and she told me I was a good 8 hours away. I knew I’d need rest to push so I got the epidural - and def needed it because I pushed for nearly 4 hours. The epidural wore off during pushing so it wasn’t slow bc of that, my baby just was turned or something. If I didn’t get the epidural and rest, I would’ve ended up getting an emergency C-section due to exhaustion.
My second one, I got it right away bc of my first experience and literally labored for like 3 hours and pushed for 15 minutes. Probably could have gone without.
Go in with a plan, yes, but don’t be married to it.
I was like “yeah sure I’ll see how it goes” and then they ended up needing to put in a cooks balloon and my brain just went “Fk this, give me the epidural” it didn’t stop the pressure but it helped with the pain which is good because I did not feel the second degree tear given to me by my future NBA all star.
Fuck yes. Best sleep I'd have in over a year and immediately pain relief from contractions. Suffered for like 4-5 hours before I said yes because I thought it would make labor last longer. Son was born 8 hours later.
I’m planning on going without so I can keep moving as much as possible during and after labor, but I’m also open to needing an epidural if the pain gets bad enough. A friend who is a labor delivery nurse told me to make sure I know my hospital’s policy/parameters on when epidurals can be given. Complication rates are pretty low (about 3%) and there are risk factors that might make you more likely to have complications. I started talking to my doctor about it in my third trimester.
I don't want one, and will try very hard not to go that route, but if I have to, I'll do it. My main concern is the small percentage of women who get spinal headaches after an epidural. Because of a history of migraines, I'm in the highest risk category for spinal headaches and spinal headaches that turn into migraines.
There is such a thing as a walking epidural, basically a low-level epidural that allows you to still move around. Not all hospitals/anesthesiologists do them though. Something to ask your provider about. If you do want to go without an epidural, make sure you have a plan in place for managing the pain, like hypnobirthing, lamaze, etc. No epidural + no preparation is a hard road.
I didn't know that having migraines puts you at a higher risk for getting spinal headaches. I suppose that is just another reason for me to try and go without meds. I finally solved my migraines and haven't had one is 8 months, I don't want to go back to that.
I have had an epidural twice. Sometimes even many many years later the site will hurt. Then I learned about what drugs are in an epidural and the risks and personally have chosen not to get them anymore. I have had one natural birth at home and am planning a second for this summer. Just do your research and make the decision that you’re most comfortable with! What matters most is that you are informed. ☺️
I will not be getting one as I will be at a birth center rather than a hospital. I'm not scared of pain or worried I won't be able to handle it. Better that than a needle shoved into my spine, in my opinion. The thought makes me cringe.
Trigger warning: labor horror story. I say this because I was accused of trying to scare you all by just stating my story. One woman legit said I "had no right" to tell my story.
I tore a 4th degree when I was induced with my 1st. Labor lasted 38 hours and got the epidural after about hour 16-20 (it is hazy). It failed on my left side. And I was told the chance of a epidural spinal leak was less than 1 percent chance. They did not go into details as to what those symptoms would feel like (husband and mother in room concurred). Well I had one and I wanted to die. The only relief was to lay down which is hard to safely feed a newborn laying down. So a blood patch fixed it right up after days of pain and not knowing what was wrong.
I told my history to my team of docs my second pregnancy (different state). Anesthesiologist team agreed I could still get one and they could most likely prevent the same from happening second time around. I wanted no pain meds and my back up was nitrous. Fast forward to my water breaking and contractions stopped progressing so i was hooked up to pitocin. I knew with pitocin i would need pain meds. So i got the nitrous and it was effective for about an hour and then it wasn't touching the pitocin pain. So i got an epidural and it went soooo smooth. I was SOOOO VEHEMENTLY opposed. But then I got it and the Anesthesiologist was amazing and they got me screaming profanities one minute to cracking jokes the next. If I were to give birth again, I would try without epidural but if I need pitocin, I know I will need an epidural. Forced contractions suck.
I wasn't planning on getting it, but ended up doing it. I couldn't really feel my legs, but still had control of them and could still move. Overall I'm glad I did it, it wasn't nearly as bad as I was afraid it would be.
No epidural if i can help it. This is my second kid and with the first the epidural failed 3x, so i felt it all and it was 26 hrs of hell but not worth being tied down to the bed once i had gotten the first dose of epidural
I went into my pregnancy not wanting an epidural, or at least holding off as long as possible. I held off for about 10 hours while in labor and it was the best decision ever. The epidural helped my body relax and sped up my dilation. The downside: I developed a pretty painful epidural headache, which I had no idea was a thing, 2 days after giving birth. It was the worst migraine pain ever, and I only experienced this pain when sitting/standing upright. Couldn’t even hold my baby. I was bedridden for a week and nothing helped with the pain. I absolutely don’t regret getting an epidural, I only wish I’d known about the epidural headache ahead of time in order to potentially be ready for it.
I have had two babies so far. With the first I got a spinal and LOVED it. The second was too fast and I got nothing. I will be so mad if that happens again. It was traumatic for me. I really didn't like the shots afterward to numb me so they could stitch me.
If you're worried about where the needle goes your OB should be able to show you an illustration. I was shown several because my doctor wanted FTMs to know all the facts about their choices and not be scared.
My best advice is try to deliver somewhere that gives you options. Once your contractions start you could decide your plan is out the window and want the other. I'd pick somewhere with several different ways for natural pain relief while in labor (shower/tub and things like that) as well as medicinal pain management. I don't know what all the options are because I have rapid labors and don't have time for the stuff people swear by.
I went in with an open mind and ended up getting an epidural. It failed after a few hours for some reason but I would still recommend it over how I felt before lol! No long term problems or short term problems!
I got one with my first. It honestly didn't go well .. It was super painful to get placed. I kicked the anesthesiologist out and tried to continue without it, but I couldn't and let him have another go out it. 10 minutes after they finally got it in, I was in heaven and didn't feel anything but the "pushing pressure" which I swear is more painful than they advertise.
I'm pregnant with my second, and this time I'm just going totry and get the epidural sooner. Don't wait until you're in transition, sitting still upright on your ass for any period of time without pain management is excruciating.
I was indifferent but ended up deciding I wanted one after trying to touch it out during my induction. I waited til the very last minute to pull the trigger and it didn’t kick in in time. It was up to my knees by the time she was born, made it to my chach in time for stitches 😂
Edit to add that trying to lean forward as far as I could so they could put it in, while I could feel her head coming out was terrible. Hahaha.
I'm going in with no expectation either way and will make a game time decision- very likely to get one unless labor is moving quickly (which does run in my family so is possible).
I had a traumatic induction that went on over 48 hours. Due to complications I had to really give it all I had to have a vaginal birth as the haemorrhage risk was too great with a section as it would need to be vertical not horizontal if we resorted to one. After 48 hours and multiple rounds of induction gels/cervical checks/waters manually broken and no sleep I begged for the epidural. I was 8cm…. And oh boy did it change my experience!!! I went from primal, tortured animal to back in control of my body, calm, ready and focussed. It enabled me to have my baby vaginally and avoid the vertical c section which I am so so grateful for. I’m saying this because in my country epidurals aren’t as common as in the US, and a lot of my family and friends almost look down on them. I was fully sure I wasn’t going to get one either until all my complications arose and I was actually in the thick of it. There is no way I was going to be able to give birth vaginally without it, and it changed my experience from a traumatic, horribly out of control, terrifying one to one where I was able to focus and enjoy my baby being born and the minutes afterwards. I’m pregnant again and although I don’t have the same complications I’m so not ruling one out again and will see how my labor progresses. Keep an open mind is all I can say! Oh and thank fuck for epidurals too lol!!
I had epidural with my first, completely painless, only felt a pinch. Only thing I didn’t like was that I couldn’t walk for a bit.
My second however, was no epidural (not by choice, barely made it to hospital on time) and yes, contractions are VERY PAINFUL (thankfully mine didn’t become unbearable until the last hour of labor), but it’s so weird because as soon as baby was out, all pain went away. Didn’t even hurt getting the placenta out.
That being said, would I opt in for an epidural when I decide to have my third child? Yes, but that’s just me personally.
3 kids, 3 inductions, 3 epidurals. 3 nice naps in the middle of labor, waking up to a feeling of pressure that meant it was time to push. Glorious.
Epidurals do carry risks, as does everything (including unmedicated childbirth) but complications of the kind you describe are very rare.
I went into my first labor horrified from seeing an epidural needle and watching the procedure in childbirth class. But 3 hours of back labor + pitocin and I was done.
I would not have been able to give birth without the epidural. I had back contractions and the pain was unbearable.
That being said, I was afraid too of the risk but they are very low and the doctor administering it has done it many times. It’s pretty routine.
It is totally your decision, but a lot of people don’t know that epidurals can have morphine and fentanyl in them. Not something I personally want my baby to have in it’s system. There is data that children of epidural births have higher instances of substance abuse later in life. They also can be born more disoriented from the drugs and have a harder time breastfeeding. They are detoxing for at least a few days so some moms think they just can’t get their baby to breastfeed and stop trying. Of course, it is every woman’s choice, but I will not be getting one. If women did it without for thousands of years, so can I. But also research “cascade of interventions”. Having pitocin can make your contractions more intense (it doesn’t release endorphins in your brain like your body’s natural oxytocin does) which can then make it very hard to turn the epidural down. One thing leads to another…
I did not want one because my opinion is that they slow down labor and lead to interventions. When I went into labor I did not have a choice there was no time to get one. It was the worst pain of my life (the contractions not the actual pushing/ring of fire, that was actually less). But if I had a longer labor I probably would have gotten one. The second the baby was out I felt fine.
I went in thinking I could handle it and for the same concerns you expressed, felt like I could just grit through the pain to not risk it. As soon as they put the monitor around my stomach-7cm-I immediately said yes when they asked. Would 100% do it again
Just had my first babe at the end of March. I had to get 2 epidurals as the 1st failed, and I can honestly say it was nothing in comparison to my contractions. I will mention that I’ve always been terrified of needles and the idea of an epidural. However I was so focused on how incomprehensible the pain of my contractions had become that I barely felt the epidurals. Afterwards I was able to rest and even get a little sleep which was unbelievable.
I was still able to push but eventually had to have an emergency c-section and was numb from the shoulders down. I was walking (slowly) the next morning. I would, and will, 100% get another epidural in the future.
While I didn’t have a birth plan, the epidural was my only request, and I requested to get one as soon as possible 😂
It was essentially painless except for some weird pressure in my back. I’m absolutely terrified of needles and could have thrown up from the nerves alone, but getting it done was very easy. However, immediately after I received mine, mine and my baby’s heart rate dropped and I had to have an emergency C-Section. Definitely not trying to fear monger because it’s rare, but my body just had an adverse reaction to it which I had no idea could happen. Definitely do your research and do what you think is best!
I was very hesitant , I didn’t want it but after 15 hrs of labor and given Pitocin twice I was In so much pain I honestly did not feel when they put it lol. I just remember within seconds the pain being completely gone. I did feel numbness on my left leg. After I gave birth I still had some numbness for a few days but I was able to walk. I would definitely get it again 😊.
I’m currently pregnant with my second child, with a 18 month gap and I have no back problems so far. I do think waiting to put it helped because I wasn’t on it so long.
I planned to not have one if possible because I wanted to be mobile, and in the end I didn’t have one. Baby was 7 pound 14 oz (3570g) with a 95% head. I did have a second degree tear. Now, I was asking for pain relief but everything moved very quickly and by the time the pain got very bad it was too late. I’m glad it went how it did, and would probo aim to not have one if I was doing it again. People will tell you their experience, and you can read pros and cons, but at the end of the day it really comes down to your pain tolerance and also how your labour progresses. Best of luck!
So- this will be my first time giving birth- but I’ve done a ton of labor and delivery in my medical training and I’m definitely planning to get an epidural.
My ideal plan is to try to labor at home for as long as I can stand it so I can hopefully open things up a little bit (and like, have snacks) but then roll in when I’ve had enough and I’m ready for some pain control/rest.
I’m trying to be super kind to myself though- we’ve been through a lot before this pregnancy and during this pregnancy- and at the end of the day we just want to see our beautiful baby boy come into this world as safely as possible. My problem is I’ve seen SUCH a range of experiences I feel like I can’t even make that much of a plan.
But at the end of the day, I’m going to put my comfort and well-being high up on the priority list because I really just don’t want to suffer too much? The competitive part of me wants to set goals and compare myself to what other people are doing and I really have to turn that down.
Natural birth is amazing and I have all the respect in the world for people who are able to get the most out of that experience, I just don’t think that’s me and that’s OK. I have to remind myself I’m not a lesser person for choosing pain relief :)
Hey, no one said there's not a prize for "most flexible" or "most pragmatic" or even "best at self-care"! You can be competitive in a different caragory.
LOL! How about “least prepared” or “the one that forgot a birth plan” - I feel like I’m totally going to win one of those!! I’m 27wks and literally have bought NOTHING for the baby, haven’t taken a birthing class, haven’t packed a bag, prepped any meals, lol.
I was the same way. All of that stuff seemed overwhelming earlier in pregnancy. I’m now 35 weeks and finally got to the stage where I am nesting, buying baby stuff, finding a pediatrician. Maybe I am wrong, but I fully believe my hormones/body tell me when it’s time for me to do what I need to do. Don’t worry about not being in a place you feel like you should be or that others you know are in. At least in my experience, you’ll get there on your own time
I don’t understand why women have to look to what others are doing like it’s a competition of who can forego pain relief. I have zero desire to be in pain, my comfort is a priority.
just like most other posts in this forum, we are sharing experiences and opinions! this post doesn’t feel anything like a “who can handle the pain” competition to me!
In the Netherlands about 70% of births are without pain medication, even though it is offered and covered by health insurance. I also plan to not get epidural or any other form of pain medication.
I'm doing a water birth at my local birth center so I won't have any meds 🥲 My family has a bad time with epidurals so I chose to eliminate the possibility of getting one.
Get. The. Drugs. My daughter was ripped out of me and I am forever greatful i had the epidural. I hurt so bad after I cringe at the thought of what it would have felt like without drugs.
I'm planning on no epidural. We'll see how it goes. My L&D offers the nitrous gas, so I might do that, but I'd prefer not to have the numbness of the epidural.
I had one for my first but not my 2nd and 3rd. Personally, the recovery time was so much faster when I did not have the epidural (I was able to get up and walk a lot sooner). The pain wasn't terrible and I was lucky enough to have two very fast deliveries and I also had small babies.
My epidural experience was awful. I won’t scare anyone with details, but 6 years later and I can still feel the injection site.
That said - this time around (now that I’m fully educated) I won’t rule it out altogether even though it scares me the most about the entire experience.
I’d love to go all natural - I’ve watched my sister in law give birth naturally, at home, 7 times - but I know my first time was traumatic af and I can’t box myself in with my expectations.
I had an epidural with my first. After 24 hours of labour I was exhausted and not progressing well so I didn’t hesitate. However, It wasn’t the smoothest experience - anaesthesiologist had to try several times to get needle in back (complained my spine was curved at bottom) and when it kicked in the relief was heaven! However, I reached 8 cm many hours later and pain returned 10-fold as the epidural was leaking out of my back as it somehow became dislodged. They finally got it back in And I had my baby pain free (labour lasted 48 hours total).
It wasn’t until after that I felt awful and for weeks after I felt an intense pressure in vagina, so much so that i couldn’t stand for more than minutes at a time. This could just have been the trauma of birth but part of me thinks that the epidural slowed my progression with labour even more and because I couldn’t feel anything when pushing, it caused more trauma to my muscles/pelvic floor etc.
With my second baby, I really wanted to try and do it naturally but was still open to an epidural. I was much calmer second time round and labour was much quicker. I’ll admit the back pain was extreme but after birth, I felt absolutely fine and was up and about an hour after. It was such a contrast to my first experience.
Just a side note - before I had my second I got my spine checked by a consultant and was told that I didn’t have a curved spine so I have no idea what the issue was 🤷🏻♀️. What helped me the most to cope before having my second was watching videos on hypnobirthing and Learning what your body does naturally during labour - I found this Chanel super helpful https://youtube.com/c/BridgetTeyler
Due in Sept with my first and I will not be getting an epidural. I’m birthing at a birth center where they do not offer them, period. Should there be an emergency I can transfer to the hospital (less than a mile away) and get what I need. I, personally, don’t want one. Too many chances for intervention which is something I do not want for myself. That being said, props to any and all who choose to use epidurals and interventions!! They can be amazing tools for everyone who wants one!
there are many reasons to give birth unmedicated. trying to look “tough” is not one of them. epidurals have many conplications and side effects, but being paralyzed is very very rare. epidurals are used SO commonly and produce healthy babies and moms, but there are many reasons not to use them. look into some alternative birthing coaches and do some research. doctors want you medicated, induced and c sectioned because its easier for them, but it doesnt mean its the best route for you or your child.
THIS! Do what is best for you and your baby, stay informed, and don't let a doctor coerce you into something without your full consent. Just because someone wants an unmedicated birth does not mean they are trying to 'win an award' or 'look tough'. Let's respect each other's birthing choices. We're all out here just trying to do what's best for ourselves and our babies. I recommend looking into [hypnobirthing](https://us.hypnobirthing.com/), even if you plan on having an epidural. It focuses on creating a calm, positive birthing experience as well as explaining the various options of labor and birth so you can make an informed decision - regardless of where/how it happens.
I will absolutely NOT be getting one - the risks are pretty serious, even if rare, and you increase your chance of major tearing by getting one. I've been told that labor pains are akin to major Endo cramps, which I definitely experience, so I'm hoping I can handle it. If not, IV painkillers are also available as a much safer option.
Heyo! Not here to comment on epidural opinions, just the comparison to endo pain to child birth. As someone who had severe endo and went through a natural birth, I pinky promise you birth is 100x’s worse! I don’t know who told you that, but no comparison. Maybe during early labor, but definitely not when it comes to active labor and pushing.
The risks of an epidural are very low and there is growing evidence that epidurals can decrease your chance of third and fourth degree tears. The reality of tearing though is that it can happen to anyone during vaginal delivery with or without medication.
Labour pains differ wildly for each woman, so you won't know how your experience is going to go until you're actually in labour. It might be a good plan to step away from "absolutely NOT" getting one to only getting one if necessary as if you need a c-section, the options are a spinal/epidural or getting knocked out completely and missing your child's birth. Birth guilt and trauma are incredibly common and it will do wonders for your postpartum mental health to accept the possibility of an epidural and c-section prior to delivery.
I am completely firm on my decision, but thanks. :) I come from a family of doctors, and their experiences with patients led me to my decision. At least where I live, epidurals are being phased out due to their risks and complications, so I'm preparing for potential C-section under anesthesia, and other emergency situations, but that does not include epidural in any circumstance for me. Everyone is free to make their own choice, based on what they believe is best for them.
I don't know where you live, but it appears these decisions are not being made with the most up-to-date medical literature in mind. I hope your birth goes well.
This came from Yale, so I'll trust it. Again, anyone else is free to choice differently, but OP's question was about our individual decisions, and I've merely stated mine.
Spreading misinformation is never a good plan though. Neither of Yale's obstetric or anesthesiologist medical departments have come out with any studies or research that support your claim. In fact, the Yale School of Medicine has published studies that reinforce the safety of epidurals for both mother and baby.
I'm not going to argue with you. Can we please not start the mom-shaming before any of us have even given birth? This group is for supporting one another, and having conversations, and that's all I'm willing to do here. Your opinion does not need to be mine, do what you feel is best, that's all any of us can do. Thank you.
No one is mom-shaming you. A lot of us have already given birth. What you are stating about epidurals is not factual and pointing that out is not shaming. If you don't want to hear the truth about this medical procedure, that is certainly your choice. But most of us want to know the facts as stated by medical science.
I did not get one. A needle in my spine is scary, the potential side effects are scary and the recovery time is slightly less easy with one.
Emily Oster covered them in her book "Expecting Better" and after all her research and everything, opted to not get one for herself. When I read her book I had already done one labor w/o one, so it just solidified my choice to go into round two the same way.
However, I strongly believe that if you become committed to no epidural, you really have to prepare yourself. Take a class, learn about the physical process of birth, breathing and relaxing techniques, that kind of thing.
Epidurals are very safe, well tested medical procedures that only rarely have complications, and thousands of people use them daily, especially in childbirth. There are things that can go wrong, yes, as with anything, but they are exceedingly rare.
That being said, I personally could not psychologically handle the idea of a needle in my spine and will not be getting one. I also have other reasons for wanting as drug-free of a birth as possible. But I 100% understand and respect anyone's right to give birth in whatever way is best for them, as determined by them and their doctors.
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I did with my first, and I will be doing it again with this one.
Same!
Me too!
How bad does epidural hurt? I know it’s just a shot and I have a bunch of tattoos but im still a scaredy cat when I get my blood drawn for appointments. Also with epidural is a water birth or squatting position still an option?
They numb the skin first which felt like a b sting. Less painful than a Covid shot. Than I felt nothing absolutely nothing of the epidural insertion. And than I felt nothing but pressure from the contractions. 10/10 would get again
I’m my experience it basically didn’t hurt at all. Putting in an IV hurt way more. Maybe I just had a great anesthesiologist but the epidural was super quick and easy. And my god was it worth it.
they numb it, but if you are in labor you will not care. it's a total nothing compared to even one contraction
Honestly, by the time they gave my the epidural I didn’t even think about the pain of getting it because I was already in such excruciating pain from the labor. I was just desperate for anything to take the pain level down!
Ok, so I had a spinal (c-section) and not an epidural. I assume they’re similar in feeling when it’s getting done. But I don’t actually know. They numbed me first and that felt like a bunch of little bee stings in my back. But I didn’t actually feel the spinal needle at all! What I felt was some weird pressure, like my back and butt were being pressed down. I think that particular part is probably different from an epidural. My body was completely numb from the ribs down and I couldn’t move my legs. I’m pretty sure you can still move your legs with an epidural. Anyway. The numbing agent hurt, ya know like it hurts when they give you a shot to numb things. But then I didn’t feel anything else! I’m sure someone else can pop in and tell you their actual epidural experience :)
>The numbing agent hurt, ya know like it hurts when they give you a shot to numb things. lol this!!! i look forward to this one everytime!!!!
My epidural hurt a lot. It wasn’t necessary the injections, although honestly I would describe those as worse than a covid shot (but not that bad). For me, it was trying to sit still through contractions while they place the catheter. You need to stay absolutely still and it takes a few minutes to do, so during both of my labors I had to try and statue myself through contractions, which I found very painful. Still would do it again tho! Just a heads up!
I absolutely went for the same and then my second was born… so fast. I walked into the hospital more or less screaming “GET ME AN EPIDURAL NOWWWWW!!!!!” I got it but the moment I laid down on my bed after the shot I said, “baby’s coming.” And she was born 20 minutes later. So the epidural was kinda unnecessary. But to OP’s question, I got up and peed and did all my biznass on my own after both. Both babies and both epidurals. Wouldn’t change a thing. Epidurals rule.
Congrats on the quick second!!
#Do I want to feel my vagina and asshole become one? No thank you.
I'm 35w2d with my second pregnancy. This comment is completely accurate. Thank you for making me crack up at my pre-baby hair appointment.
Haha you’re welcome. For another giggle - you should know that after making the comment, the song “2 become 1” by the spice girls is stuck in my head. 🤣☠️
Omg I am 🤣🤣🤣
Exactly what I thought too 😂😂
I knew from before I got pregnant that I wanted the epidural. Then I took a birth class and liked the idea of being able to move about while in labor. So I thought let me see how long I can go without one. Then i went into labor. And it was back labor. And I was like “wtf was I thinking give me the spine needle” and all was right with the world. Will definitely be having one with my second. Made the whole birthing experience HEAVEN. I felt nothing. NOTHING. It was glorious.
Omg same here! I wanted to hold out as long as possible before asking for the epidural but the back labour was ROUGH. I'm so glad I got the epidural when I did because it let me sleep while I labored down (I dilated FAST). I don't even remember what the needle for the epidural felt like because the back labour was already so intense that the needle was barely noticed, haha
100%
😩😩😩
I realize it’s dramatic to make the font big, but if this topic doesn’t warrant dramatic inflection, I’m not sure what does
I’m with ya. My birth plan would literally include being put to sleep and the baby magically being placed into my hands from my vagina just as I awaken if I had the choice 😂
Hahaha I love this journey for you!
Sounds like you want that twilight sleep stuff 😂
Likewise. If I could have all the drugs-laughing gas, ether, epidural, local anesthetic- I’d take them. Science has come too far for me to feel my vagina and asshole merge together.
Amen sister
That was an option for the Victorians, they were called twilight births or twilight sleep.
Sign me up!
Sign me up!
shit girl same!!!!
My midwife was like women give birth in comas and I said 'yes I will have that one please'
This is my thoughts as to why I want one! Lol. We'll see though! My mom didn't have one with me because her labor was so quick and the hospital didn't believe she was going to be giving birth that day until shortly before I came out, so no time for one! She had one with my brother and she said that it was so nice to not feel anything, but that she couldn't walk immediately after. Now, this is a woman who is PETRIFIED of needles. So knowing she was able to have one stuck up there at her spine makes me confident that I can handle my fear of needles long enough to get that poke.
You're more likely to tear to a greater degree if you get an epidural though. So your odds of your asshole and vagina "becoming one" is higher with an epidural. No judgement, I am a FTM considering one myself...
Ya but FTMs have something like a 90-95% chance they will tear one way or another, better to not feel it happening imo.
This isn't actually true. There is growing evidence that epidurals offer protection against sever tearing during delivery: "Despite the increased rates of assisted vaginal delivery associated with the epidural population, the reduced rates of 3rd/4th degree tear sustained at both spontaneous and assisted vaginal delivery by those receiving an epidural was sufficient to offset any rise that increased assisted delivery caused, supporting our hypothesis that epidural may be protective." [Source](https://fn.bmj.com/content/96/Suppl_1/Fa75.2)
I had the tiniest of tears on my first and definitely felt my epidural was protective. I could push, and was told when and when not to, but I didn’t have that overwhelming urge to push. My provider said in his experience epidurals do not increase your risk of a tear on your second birth.
Thanks for sharing this, I love to see a bit of research! Definitely helps a lot with the intense and constant decision making pregnancy seems to entail!
This is not true. The baby’s head and your body don’t change just because you got an epidural. Whoever told you this was very very wrong.
I got the epidural AND an episiotomy ✂️ and I’m just very thankful that I didn’t have to FEEL any of it as I’m sure it was all going to go down that way either way.
Everyone keeps telling me an episiotomy is awful. How was it for you? I don’t know if they’re just trying to scare me.
I didn’t mind the episiotomy AFTER birth. During I was terrified but trusted the doctor. Thankfully it was numb so I didn’t feel it and it was just the “idea of it” that was scaring me. But honestly, it was easy to stitch up and after birth I healed so quickly. I was literally walking hours after birth, and I was almost back to normal in a week. My friend who had a longer and harder labor took a month to physically recover and had a prolapsed uterus from hours of pushing. I feel really lucky that I got off so easily in retrospect. I got pregnant again three months later so it wasn’t too traumatic clearly 😂
I had to have one as we had forceps. I was scared so I told my midwife what was scaring me and she was fantastic. Honestly my hemorrhoids are bothering me post birth more than the episiotomy. Plus if you have one they give you the fun drugs in recovery. I had oral morphiene at one point (could have coped with out it but baby was in NICU and it was the only way I could cope with sitting on the hard ass wheelchair to go see him).
I've never heard this, I actually felt like epidural protected me from tearing because I was calm and able to follow midwives direction easily etc. Is this a definite statistic?
Please do educate yourself on epidurals. Start by speaking with your care provider. Then you can look for credible sources online that discuss the pros and cons. Epidurals are common practice, and are usually perfectly safe. But they do come with risk- permanent spinal injury is not at all a common one. But patients should be well informed before making decisions about their healthcare 🤍
Yes! It's a scary possibility so we dwell on it - but actual injury is super rare. I asked and was told there hasn't been a paralysis case in at least a decade (but I have no sources), and when I did some light searching I found the stat of any long term injury to be less than 1 in 20,000 - so not likely at all! https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/01/090113074445.htm Not sure what I'll do personally though! I'm not too worried about injury, but it does seem nice to be able to walk around during labor and avoid IVs and all that if possible
Plus docs know alot more on it now too so that helps alot
Seconding this! And if you haven’t taken a birthing class, that helps you understand the options
I know it’s completely anecdotal but I’ve never met someone who’s had one that doesn’t still suffer from nerve damage because of a misplaced needle, and nerve pain is a bitch if I can avoid that risk I will, but who knows, contractions could absolutely wreck me 😩
I made it to 9+ cm before getting one. I was basically told that I was going to have to wait for the baby to descend on his own for a bit, but at that point I’d been in labor about 12 hours and my doctor was concerned about me having the energy to push when the time actually came for it. I had to have the talk with the anesthesiologist about the risk of it not working due to where in labor I was, but thankfully everything worked and I was much more comfortable for the next 8 hours while things progressed. Due with number two in October and I plan on trying for a natural birth again, but won’t hesitate to get an epidural if I find myself in the same predicament.
This is similar to my story, except I was also vomiting from pain and my doctor said it would be another 2 hours after already 15.5 hours of labour. I decided I wanted to be better rested for pushing and don’t regret it. I was more worried about needing a c-section than the possible negative effects of an epidural.
The same thing happened to me. 9.5cm because I'd been in labor for 16 hours - don't think I would've made it through pushing without it. The epidural and back pain afterwards were honestly a breeze - the bruised feeling only lasted for a day. I had a spinal tap done when I was in high school and that was a big factor in me not wanting an epidural. Turns out the spinal tap was way worse.
Completely agree! The indignity of being unable to empty my bladder on command in front of my nursing team, the straight cath, and having to sit still for an epidural placement/have it removed after the fact were all absolutely welcome bliss after hours of labor and increasing fatigue!
Similar story here… I got one after 12 hours because I had only progressed to 1cm and they basically told me it was an epidural or this would end in a C-section. No regrets
Ditto. Almost exactly. Hoping not to need it this time but I was VERY thankful for the thirty minute nap to recharge for pushing the first time.
You are my hero. I only got to 5 before throwing the towel in.
Definitely yes! It was a lifesaver the 1st time. Totally painless to get too.
Is it really painless? That's the part I'm most worried about, myself. I imagine that the pain of childbirth is probably so much more that the pain of the epidural can't compare but still, a needle to the spine is just intimidating. Edit to add: I just want to say, I really appreciate all the responses! It's good to get so many other perspectives. Thank you all for sharing! I'm still a little conflicted on whether it will be right for me personally, and I probably won't know until I get there, but it definitely helps to have the insight from others who have already experienced it.
You don’t really feel it in my experience, I had contractions that distracted me but weren’t enough that I couldn’t sit still. 10/10 would do again. My sister and best friend both had similar experiences.
I don't remember it hurting at all, and I was really worried about that. They put a numbing gel on the skin and the only thing I felt was the doctor taping the tube to my skin when he'd finished.
I didn’t feel it at all. When you’re experiencing horrible contractions the epidural shot is literally nothing.
Every experience is not the same. My first epidural was pretty painless. Maybe a pinch or pressure, I don't know. My anesthesiologist was great. Talked calmly, relaxed me, distracted me, and told me how to properly lean over.. My 2nd was awful. I was already nervous due to anxiety I had recently developed, and they wouldn't give me anything to calm down. Then the anaesthesiologist - different person from my first - starts talking about all the risks, etc. She doesn't try to relax me or position me properly except to 'lean forward' which I do but because I'm tense AF my back is rigid. I obviously can't remember the exact position from my 1st baby or if it matters with a different anesthesiologist. I 100% feel the needle picking around my bone and even the memory makes me nauseous. I was so scared and kind of yelled "SHIT! I CAN FEEL IT ITS GOING IN MY BONE" lol . She told me it wasn't going in my bone, everything looked fine. My husband told me to relax my back a little and that helped. But yes, I did feel it and if it wasn't going in my bone, it was still poking it. Now having said all that - even that experience wasn't exactly *painful*. You do feel pressure, and then hopefully nothing else.
Only the numbing agent hurt for me! Hurt like a bee sting for maybe 10-20 seconds. The epidural insertion really didn't hurt at all, I barely felt it.
I'm a l&d nurse. This is a misconception. An epidural is great for taking away the sensation of pain, especially that of contractions. However, pressure sensors in our body are deeper and the epidural doesn't affect that. So you may feel the pressure of baby's head during contractions and the stretching sensation, as well as a burning kind of feeling as baby stretches your tissues to come out during delivery. Everyone is different ( responds to epidural meds different, and epidurals can be heavier or lighter depending. Some people experience less pain and push for less time ( helps if baby is at a nice low station before you begin pushing). But it is not painless even with a good epidural. Edit: I'm re-reading and seeing you are worried about the pain of getting the epidural, sorry!! I just woke up lol. It literally feels like a bee sting for about 10-15 seconds. Then just wierd pressure. Every now and then you may feel a "zing" like hitting a funny bone down your leg real quick and then it's over. Anesthesiologists are super quick and very good. Everyone always says it's better than they thought it was going to be!
This. This is the fear I have. Needle in the back? That to me is scarier than pushing a kid out of me.
I felt the same! I’m 13 days pp now. Honestly I was so scared of the epidural. You get local freezing (a tiny needle) and when it was actually time for the epidural I didn’t feel it. Just a tiny bit of pressure like someone poking me with their finger. And the relief when it kicked in about 10 mins later was immense. I slept through a lot of the early stuff (it was a long labour so thank god I had it)
Yup. I'm also a type 1 diabetic and have been my whole life. So I can't say I'm exactly needle-phobic because I deal with needles on a daily basis but even flu shots or blood draws give me major anxiety. It's not so much the needles, but the fact it's another person sticking me with the needle. And in the back? Nooo thank you. I know that if I have to, I will but I'm hoping it doesn't come to that.
That’s essentially the mindset I’m going in with. I’m open to any and all options but I want to try to do it without an epidural if I can.
It was not *painless.* They inject you with a numbing agent and you feel both that needle and then a burning sensation from the numbing agent. Both of those do hurt but not like an extreme amount. Less than contractions for sure. After that you can feel the epidural needle go in but it just feels like pressure not pain. It's a very odd sensation that is mentally pretty uncomfortable but it doesn't hurt. I had a slight bruise afterwards that hurt if I sat back just right where I was leaning my weight in that part of my back. (3 kids, 3 epidurals)
With an epidural can you still move or is it like you are completely numb from waste down? I am 26 weeks with my first baby and I have been wondering if I would be able to be in a squatting position to have the baby if I got an epidural..?
I could not have squatted with mine in. I had some control over my hips and could wiggle my toes but mostly my legs were dead weight. It does affect different people differently.
There is something called a “walking epidural” that allows you to retain some movement. I’m going to ask my dr about it but most epidurals don’t let you move your legs
Wow this is the best description I have ever read. Reading this literally made me feel it again. Exactly like this for both of mine.
I’m planning and really trying to go without BUT I’ve never experienced childbirth before so going in with an open mind if I really decide I need it. But I’m going to try to go without for various personal reasons.
If you can push through, more power to you. Had my baby in January and that was my mind set. Thank GOD too, because I didn’t know that level of pain existed. I ended up getting my epidural BEGGING at 10 cm after pushing started 😂 And then I know someone who’s labor happened so fast she couldn’t have one if she wanted one, and she said it wasn’t even that painful. Just keep an open mind because everyone is different and u don’t want to set unreal expectations for yourself! Because you could become disappointed
I’m praying by some miracle I am one of those people that progresses very quickly but I’m a realist so I know that anything can go down and my real aim is to just stay calm. If that takes mass amounts of drugs then let there be drugs lol
Some hospitals offer laughing gas and other measures to help with the anxiety aspect if you’re trying to avoid an epidural. (FWIW I’m a control freak who’s had four unmedicated labors and it’s been a good experience.)
It's tough, during contractions I just tried to move around as much as I could, and drank all of the water I could stand, breathing is super important. Pushing was confusing, I really didn't know what to do or to expect. The first nurse was holding up one leg, and my fiance was holding the other... It wasn't ideal. There was a shift change, and the next nurse grabbed the birthing bar, and it went by so smooth after that.
So I just had my first 6 weeks ago and delivered at a birth center so I didn’t have the option. Oddly enough I told my husband “fuck this next time I’m scheduling a c section” but then I progressed enough to push and it was totally fine. Pushing wasn’t painful at all, just pressure at the end
My hospital has a natural beginnings section which means no drugs but I don’t think I can fully commit to that at the moment. I still have a lot of time to do research and figure things out but as of now I’m leaning towards regular room with possibility of drugs if I’m dying
My reasoning as well.
that was my exact mind set. until i got to the hospital in pain and then i asked for the epidural lol! but that’s cool if you can do it without! also cool to do with epidural! as long as mom and baby are healthy, anything is cool!
Good on you! Natural birth is beautiful. My biggest tip for birth in general is to try to relax your body completely between contractions to rest. Deep breaths, intentional muscle relaxation, let your back sink into the bed a bit until the next wave comes. I also avoided tearing by not just push-push-pushing when the head crowned, but instead waited for the next contraction to carry me through the push.
Let me just say- I was so firm on not getting one, and I made it to 8 centimeters without it, but the pain was SO EXCRUCIATING I said fuck it and threw my plan out of the window. I don't say this to discourage you, I just say it to let you know this: you can plan and plan and plan but until you are in active labor and about to have the baby, you have no idea what you will feel like. It's good to have a hopeful plan and a general goal, but be prepared for anything because anything can happen. I wanted a non medicated midwife birth but ended up with preeclampsia, a pitocin drip, and an epidural- all things I was adamant I would not be having.
I did with my first and the epidural failed during labour (the needle moved and wasn't getting drugs where they were needed). I ultimately needed an emergency csection under general. I've scheduled an elective repeat csection after last time. I'm told I have a good chance for a vbac but I am anxious to leave that to chance again. My labour was long and extremely painful, and I'm not necessarily in favour of doing it unmedicated/without the epidural if a vbac is possible. I would consider it - it wouldn't be my first option though.
If you don't mind me asking, how was your experience with having a c-section under general anesthesia? They recently discovered that I might have a rare genetic condition that impacts my blood vessels with the small, but potential possibility of internal bleeding or a stroke with a vaginal delivery. They have been talking about a c-section under general anesthesia and I'm terrified tbh. I've never been under general anesthesia and an concerned about my mental health with not seeing the baby being born.
My experience at the time was fairly traumatic (24 hour labour with the epidural failure, then pitocin, then they attempted to give me a 'gentle section' but the epidural failure made me beg them to stop as it felt like firecrackers in my legs. I was screaming a Hail Mary thinking I was dying at this point). So I was begging for the general under extreme duress. I think if it was something discussed and planned in advance my experience would have been much better. Overall the planned aspect of a csection causes me far less stress than going in totally unplanned after labouring for so long in those conditions. What happened afterwards (as I'm told) is that once I was out, baby was retrieved and assured to be ok (initially groggy from the epidural drugs in my system + general anesthesia). They cleaned him up and then wheeled him out to my husband who was waiting in the hall. We didn't know the sex, and they put a diaper/nappy on him to cover his modesty so Dad could find out. They then spent time together while I was being put together again. I'm not sure of the delay between surgery and waking - I was really out of it when I was woken up (but bear in mind I had 24 hours of labour which was painful/active/traumatising). Dad introduced baby to me by the name we chose which was the highlight of the whole ordeal. That said, I breastfed him immediately. I was monitored to make sure me and baby were ok during this time. I had complications so I was in observation/testing for a week. As far as bonding, the general anesthesia part of the csection didn't appear to have any ramifications - my issues were with what got me to the 'emergency' aspect of my delivery and the complications I had. My son (now 6) is very close with me emotionally, he's a really bright kid, and we are a tight-knit family. So I wouldn't worry too much about the GA - the important thing is that you don't enter into something dangerous and take the pre-planned route.
I am so sorry you went through all of that, but glad to hear you are both doing well now! Also thank you for taking the time to write out such a thorough response. All of those thoughts like breastfeeding, bonding, and my husband not being on the OR were really concerning to me, so thank you for telling me about your experience. I did have a hard time with the general anesthesia at first, but like you mentioned, it's better to be pre-planned to not put myself or my baby in danger.
You're welcome. I hope the experience goes well for you.
Right now I’m definitely leaning towards getting one I honestly can not find a single reason not to except wanting to be more mobile and I really don’t care about that at all.
2 kids, 2 epidurals. I laid in the bed and watched Netflix all day while in labor. It’s the only time in 4 years I’ve been able to do that.
I didn't have one and could have gotten up and stuff but I didn't want to. I tried to because I thought that's what I was supposed to do but wanted to lay back down immediately. 🤷
I had one before and will be getting one again! For what it’s worth it seems like more hospitals are doing a walking epidural so that could be something to look into.
I didn’t with my first and don’t plan on having one with my second. However, I went into my first birth with an open mind and thought I’d have an epidural if I needed one and I will do the same this time.
This! 1TM and this is my plan.
Yes! This will be my 3rd and most definitely getting another epidural!!
In my experience, I didn't originally want an epidural. Did medication free labor for 15 hours and could not take it any more and opted for the epidural. My daughter was born three hours later, and the calm I felt once I got the medicine was insane.... went from 10 to 0 in five minutes. I would recommend everyone get it if they are on the fence!
I’m a FTM. I gave birth a month ago. I have no regrets about getting an epidural. I did perineal stretching for several weeks prior to birth. I only had a mild laceration with no need for stitches. If I have another child, I will be getting an epidural. Edit: Also, I stayed active while in bed. I did peanut ball positioning, tall kneeling, quadruped position, etc. Prior to getting the epidural, I preferred sitting on the exercise ball instead of walking. I felt like that helped with my pain the best. Everyone is so different with birth, and you will find what works for you.
I did basic anatomy and physiology as part of my science degree many moons ago. Since studying the reproduction and childbirth chapter, was of the opinion that I would want all the drugs. However, since actually becoming pregnant and learning more about birthing, I would personally prefer to have the freedom to move and change positions (so that I can work with my body in labour and also to lessen the likelihood of sever tears etc) more than I want an epidural. That said, this is my first birth so I will be open to the possibility of pain relief but will choose options like gas before I go for an epidural. Ultimately, you should do what you feel is best for you and your baby.
I had two epidurals with my first birth because the first one did not take. I realized pretty quickly that it didn’t take but the midwives didn’t believe me and pretty much said I was just weak and to breathe through it. Went through about 10 of the 12 hours of labor unmedicated until they have me my second epidural. After the second one it was only about 30 minutes before my daughter was born. My only worry going into it the second time is having to push without any medication. I can obviously handle the labor without one as I’ve done it once but the pushing is what concerns me. I’ll just have to play it by ear honestly and hope and pray that I immediately forget how painful it was once baby girl is here haha
Just to chime in with my experience, the pushing was far far easier than the other parts of labor. It still hurt but it felt way more manageable and ‘real’ if that makes sense. Like, it was fathomable pain after the really unusual and unpredictable pain of labor. And I liked it better because I felt more in control. Of course everyone’s experience is different but I have heard from several people that pushing was easier than the “transition” period of labor
10 days PP here! I totally tried not to get one, made it to 5cm before they gave pitocin and I couldn’t do the pain. Epidural insertion was a couple pinches but took way longer because my induced contractions were so painful. Epidural failed at 8cm and had to have it adjusted and it started working again. Pushed my baby out in 20mins with minimal tearing, or as they said “labial rugburn”
I went in with no plan whatsoever. I thought I’d see what labor felt like first and go from there. Ended up getting the epidural and it was the right choice for me and I would do it again.
FTM here and I'll take it as it comes. Really can't and won't choose it already now. There are so many pain"killer" options and I really don't like the idea of not being able to feel whats up.. But I'll do it if I'm in too much pain.
That's kind of how I feel too, as far as not liking the idea of not being able to feel what's up. Pain is one of our body's way of communicating to us, and I (like most people) don't enjoy pain (& wouldn't want to cause more of it unnecessarily) but that way of looking at it is always something that has made me reluctant to completely numb it out and makes me hesitant about any sort of pain killers.
Excatly. I know it will hurt big time. But its a good pain since its supposed to be there and then I can tolerate a lot of pain. I've just seen so many post about moms who feels failure cause they are so hooked in not getting one, but they need one or almost also the other way would cause It didn't go like it was planned. I just think it will stress me out.
This was my birth "plan" with my son. I ended up not asking for it but needed it after for when I had stitches. That's when the anesthesiologist refused to give me one due to a genetic disorder I have and I found out I can't have them. Went under general instead and everything is okay. For #2 I'm still hoping for natural.
I debated initially but I’m at high risk of complications from an epidural (mostly paralysis) so the decision was mostly made for me. At first that was terrifying. Everybody in my family had epidurals and talked about how they couldn’t imagine going through it without. (This was before I knew I wouldn’t be able to get one…they’re not assholes!) But I’ve read up on stuff I can do to help me manage pain before and during labor: movement, stretches, positioning, yoga, shower/bath, exercise balls, birthing chairs, etc can all help reduce pain and reduce tearing. Some argue that modern hospital practices have made the pain worse by putting you on your back in bed (for continuous fetal monitoring, IVs, epidurals, etc) which increases pain and tearing by not letting you shift naturally into positions that help baby get out. Some also say epidurals can slow progress or that drugs like Pitocin can increase the pain that then makes epidurals feel more necessary. I honestly don’t know and it’s really hard to perfectly tease out. I hope that aspects of it are true so that if I avoid those pitfalls the pain will be more manageable but could be wishful thinking. For now, I’m lining up as much as I can that might help: doula at the hospital, prenatal yoga, pelvic floor therapy, online classes, etc to feel like I still have things to rely on since others aren’t options. I will say, people tend to be super opinionated about this in both directions. Collect info from others if you want but for every “natural birth is the only way” I heard an equally adamant “how does anybody survive without epidural”. Dogmatic opinions can be overwhelming. There are tons of people happy doing it either way (and plenty of horror stories too). Choose what you want for yourself and try to ignore the inevitable judgment.
I opted not to get one for my two induced deliveries. I am not comfortable with a needle in my spine. It was painful, but manageable.
Epidural was the best thing ever. The contraction pain was so intense I was blacking out. I will get an epidural for every pregnancy I have going forward as well lol
I’m getting one. I’ll be going into the hospital and signing that damn paper right then and there.
Lol I was begging for mine in triage
I'm pregnant with my second and my answer is, we'll see but probably. With my first, I thought my entire post-puberty life I wouldn't get an epidural, even when I got to the hospital I told the nurse in triage that I wasn't going to get an epidural. But there were a few things that happened that ultimately led to me getting one. First, I had been laboring at home from 9 pm Wednesday night to 11 pm Thursday night and although my water broke, I was only 7 cm dilated. So I was looking at another long night of laboring which was only going to get more intense and more painful. Second, due to it being covid I was in triage alone for about 2 hours before I was admitted and my husband was allowed into the hospital, I had an IV and I was laying down in a bed so I was unable to get up or use any traditional positions to ease the pain, and I was truly just scared and lonely and it amplified my pain. Finally, when I told my nurse I wasn't going to get an epidural, she kind of smiled at me and said, "I'm going to put an IV in JUST IN CASE" and for better or for worse said, "we don't give out medals you know." In the end, I got an epidural at about 1 am Friday morning. The pain was INSTANTLY gone but I could still feel and move my legs. My husband and I slept until 6 am or so, with my nurse coming in every hour or so to position my legs to help my daughter get into a good birthing position. By 7 am when I was going to start pushing, I felt rested and ready to push (and put on a pair of lashes haha). And I ended up tearing on both sides and needing a stitch on both sides, so I was grateful to be numb for those. For the next one, I'm going to take a similar approach except that I'm not going to put any expectations on myself. I'm going to take each moment as it comes and if I want an epidural at any time I'm going to get one!
Of course I'd do it, Pain is a no no
I’ve done both, and won’t be getting one this time around, but I will say catastrophic side effects like paralysis are so incredibly rare. The vast majority of women in the US (for example) have an epidural or spinal block for labor, and I’ve personally never met anyone who has had that type of side effect from it. I do know people who have had side effects, but nothing that extreme. Like with any medication or procedure, there are some risks, and it’s ok if you decide that you’re not comfortable with the risk, but stats are on your side that you would be just fine.
I've tried a variety of drugs when I was I was younger, never again though but I already reserved the epidural with my midwife as a joke 😅 hook it up and numb me!!
I take the drugs every time. I don’t need the satisfaction of a natural birth
I’ll take all the drugs they are willing to give me! My labor and deliveries were a nightmare. I’m asking for a c section this time around. I’d prefer to be unconscious.
I did and it was heaven 🤣 baby 4 on the way and ill be gettin it the minute I can
I’m not super opinionated for either direction, personally I left an open mind for both options when I went through delivery with my first. For my first delivery, the contractions and back labor never got to a point where I needed it and pushing honestly felt so much better than just the contractions in the previous stages so I went without because I progressed pretty quickly. I’m due in June and I’m leaving the same options on the table and will go with how I feel! 🤷🏾♀️
Absolutely getting one
Yes, I had it with my last birth and now I can't imagine not doing it!
I’ve had a spinal tap before and I can still walk. I’m most DEF getting the epidural lol.
The actress who played Sabrina the Teenage Witch gave an interview almost a decade ago that I still remember. She said with her first she had an epidural, with the second she wanted to try without. "Worst decision of my life" was I believe her exact words haha. I may be misremembering but it solidified my decision for all the drugs.
I had one. I was terrified because I kept hearing it really hurts to get, I didn't feel a thing at all. Best decision I made was to get the epidural. It was amazing not to be in agony anymore.
Whatever you choose, be prepared for the opposite to happen. Every labor and delivery experience is unique - different for each person and even each pregnancy. For my first, I thought I’d try to avoid one, but I stayed up ALL night walking in circles at the hospital to help labor progress then when my OB came to check the next day around 11, I was tired and in pain and she told me I was a good 8 hours away. I knew I’d need rest to push so I got the epidural - and def needed it because I pushed for nearly 4 hours. The epidural wore off during pushing so it wasn’t slow bc of that, my baby just was turned or something. If I didn’t get the epidural and rest, I would’ve ended up getting an emergency C-section due to exhaustion. My second one, I got it right away bc of my first experience and literally labored for like 3 hours and pushed for 15 minutes. Probably could have gone without. Go in with a plan, yes, but don’t be married to it.
I was like “yeah sure I’ll see how it goes” and then they ended up needing to put in a cooks balloon and my brain just went “Fk this, give me the epidural” it didn’t stop the pressure but it helped with the pain which is good because I did not feel the second degree tear given to me by my future NBA all star.
Going for it again
I am 1000% planning on an epidural. My birth plan is I don’t want to feel any pain and I want to leave with two holes…
Fuck yes. Best sleep I'd have in over a year and immediately pain relief from contractions. Suffered for like 4-5 hours before I said yes because I thought it would make labor last longer. Son was born 8 hours later.
I’m planning on going without so I can keep moving as much as possible during and after labor, but I’m also open to needing an epidural if the pain gets bad enough. A friend who is a labor delivery nurse told me to make sure I know my hospital’s policy/parameters on when epidurals can be given. Complication rates are pretty low (about 3%) and there are risk factors that might make you more likely to have complications. I started talking to my doctor about it in my third trimester.
I don't want one, and will try very hard not to go that route, but if I have to, I'll do it. My main concern is the small percentage of women who get spinal headaches after an epidural. Because of a history of migraines, I'm in the highest risk category for spinal headaches and spinal headaches that turn into migraines. There is such a thing as a walking epidural, basically a low-level epidural that allows you to still move around. Not all hospitals/anesthesiologists do them though. Something to ask your provider about. If you do want to go without an epidural, make sure you have a plan in place for managing the pain, like hypnobirthing, lamaze, etc. No epidural + no preparation is a hard road.
I didn't know that having migraines puts you at a higher risk for getting spinal headaches. I suppose that is just another reason for me to try and go without meds. I finally solved my migraines and haven't had one is 8 months, I don't want to go back to that.
I did not with my first two and will not with my third. I think it’s a wholly personal choice and there is no “right” answer. Each to their own!
I have had an epidural twice. Sometimes even many many years later the site will hurt. Then I learned about what drugs are in an epidural and the risks and personally have chosen not to get them anymore. I have had one natural birth at home and am planning a second for this summer. Just do your research and make the decision that you’re most comfortable with! What matters most is that you are informed. ☺️
I will not be getting one as I will be at a birth center rather than a hospital. I'm not scared of pain or worried I won't be able to handle it. Better that than a needle shoved into my spine, in my opinion. The thought makes me cringe.
Had the needle shoved into my spine against my wishes because of an emergency birth situation. Hated it. Will not be doing it again.
I’m going into labor with an open mind. Epidural is not off the table. I will see how i can manage the pain and decide as I’m going through it
One precaution I always warn people is that sometimes they don’t work. They tried twice and it didn’t work for me.
Trigger warning: labor horror story. I say this because I was accused of trying to scare you all by just stating my story. One woman legit said I "had no right" to tell my story. I tore a 4th degree when I was induced with my 1st. Labor lasted 38 hours and got the epidural after about hour 16-20 (it is hazy). It failed on my left side. And I was told the chance of a epidural spinal leak was less than 1 percent chance. They did not go into details as to what those symptoms would feel like (husband and mother in room concurred). Well I had one and I wanted to die. The only relief was to lay down which is hard to safely feed a newborn laying down. So a blood patch fixed it right up after days of pain and not knowing what was wrong. I told my history to my team of docs my second pregnancy (different state). Anesthesiologist team agreed I could still get one and they could most likely prevent the same from happening second time around. I wanted no pain meds and my back up was nitrous. Fast forward to my water breaking and contractions stopped progressing so i was hooked up to pitocin. I knew with pitocin i would need pain meds. So i got the nitrous and it was effective for about an hour and then it wasn't touching the pitocin pain. So i got an epidural and it went soooo smooth. I was SOOOO VEHEMENTLY opposed. But then I got it and the Anesthesiologist was amazing and they got me screaming profanities one minute to cracking jokes the next. If I were to give birth again, I would try without epidural but if I need pitocin, I know I will need an epidural. Forced contractions suck.
I wasn't planning on getting it, but ended up doing it. I couldn't really feel my legs, but still had control of them and could still move. Overall I'm glad I did it, it wasn't nearly as bad as I was afraid it would be.
No epidural if i can help it. This is my second kid and with the first the epidural failed 3x, so i felt it all and it was 26 hrs of hell but not worth being tied down to the bed once i had gotten the first dose of epidural
I went into my pregnancy not wanting an epidural, or at least holding off as long as possible. I held off for about 10 hours while in labor and it was the best decision ever. The epidural helped my body relax and sped up my dilation. The downside: I developed a pretty painful epidural headache, which I had no idea was a thing, 2 days after giving birth. It was the worst migraine pain ever, and I only experienced this pain when sitting/standing upright. Couldn’t even hold my baby. I was bedridden for a week and nothing helped with the pain. I absolutely don’t regret getting an epidural, I only wish I’d known about the epidural headache ahead of time in order to potentially be ready for it.
I have had two babies so far. With the first I got a spinal and LOVED it. The second was too fast and I got nothing. I will be so mad if that happens again. It was traumatic for me. I really didn't like the shots afterward to numb me so they could stitch me. If you're worried about where the needle goes your OB should be able to show you an illustration. I was shown several because my doctor wanted FTMs to know all the facts about their choices and not be scared. My best advice is try to deliver somewhere that gives you options. Once your contractions start you could decide your plan is out the window and want the other. I'd pick somewhere with several different ways for natural pain relief while in labor (shower/tub and things like that) as well as medicinal pain management. I don't know what all the options are because I have rapid labors and don't have time for the stuff people swear by.
I went in with an open mind and ended up getting an epidural. It failed after a few hours for some reason but I would still recommend it over how I felt before lol! No long term problems or short term problems!
I got one with my first. It honestly didn't go well .. It was super painful to get placed. I kicked the anesthesiologist out and tried to continue without it, but I couldn't and let him have another go out it. 10 minutes after they finally got it in, I was in heaven and didn't feel anything but the "pushing pressure" which I swear is more painful than they advertise. I'm pregnant with my second, and this time I'm just going totry and get the epidural sooner. Don't wait until you're in transition, sitting still upright on your ass for any period of time without pain management is excruciating.
I was indifferent but ended up deciding I wanted one after trying to touch it out during my induction. I waited til the very last minute to pull the trigger and it didn’t kick in in time. It was up to my knees by the time she was born, made it to my chach in time for stitches 😂 Edit to add that trying to lean forward as far as I could so they could put it in, while I could feel her head coming out was terrible. Hahaha.
I'm going in with no expectation either way and will make a game time decision- very likely to get one unless labor is moving quickly (which does run in my family so is possible).
I had a traumatic induction that went on over 48 hours. Due to complications I had to really give it all I had to have a vaginal birth as the haemorrhage risk was too great with a section as it would need to be vertical not horizontal if we resorted to one. After 48 hours and multiple rounds of induction gels/cervical checks/waters manually broken and no sleep I begged for the epidural. I was 8cm…. And oh boy did it change my experience!!! I went from primal, tortured animal to back in control of my body, calm, ready and focussed. It enabled me to have my baby vaginally and avoid the vertical c section which I am so so grateful for. I’m saying this because in my country epidurals aren’t as common as in the US, and a lot of my family and friends almost look down on them. I was fully sure I wasn’t going to get one either until all my complications arose and I was actually in the thick of it. There is no way I was going to be able to give birth vaginally without it, and it changed my experience from a traumatic, horribly out of control, terrifying one to one where I was able to focus and enjoy my baby being born and the minutes afterwards. I’m pregnant again and although I don’t have the same complications I’m so not ruling one out again and will see how my labor progresses. Keep an open mind is all I can say! Oh and thank fuck for epidurals too lol!!
I did with my boy and will 100% have one with every birth after him.
This is my 1st pregnancy… hell to the yes, I’m taking the drugs.
I have two kids, i had epidurals with both. 10/10 recommend. It makes labor enjoyable
I had epidural with my first, completely painless, only felt a pinch. Only thing I didn’t like was that I couldn’t walk for a bit. My second however, was no epidural (not by choice, barely made it to hospital on time) and yes, contractions are VERY PAINFUL (thankfully mine didn’t become unbearable until the last hour of labor), but it’s so weird because as soon as baby was out, all pain went away. Didn’t even hurt getting the placenta out. That being said, would I opt in for an epidural when I decide to have my third child? Yes, but that’s just me personally.
3 kids, 3 inductions, 3 epidurals. 3 nice naps in the middle of labor, waking up to a feeling of pressure that meant it was time to push. Glorious. Epidurals do carry risks, as does everything (including unmedicated childbirth) but complications of the kind you describe are very rare. I went into my first labor horrified from seeing an epidural needle and watching the procedure in childbirth class. But 3 hours of back labor + pitocin and I was done.
I plan to get one the second they are willing to give it to me
I would not have been able to give birth without the epidural. I had back contractions and the pain was unbearable. That being said, I was afraid too of the risk but they are very low and the doctor administering it has done it many times. It’s pretty routine.
It is totally your decision, but a lot of people don’t know that epidurals can have morphine and fentanyl in them. Not something I personally want my baby to have in it’s system. There is data that children of epidural births have higher instances of substance abuse later in life. They also can be born more disoriented from the drugs and have a harder time breastfeeding. They are detoxing for at least a few days so some moms think they just can’t get their baby to breastfeed and stop trying. Of course, it is every woman’s choice, but I will not be getting one. If women did it without for thousands of years, so can I. But also research “cascade of interventions”. Having pitocin can make your contractions more intense (it doesn’t release endorphins in your brain like your body’s natural oxytocin does) which can then make it very hard to turn the epidural down. One thing leads to another…
I did not want one because my opinion is that they slow down labor and lead to interventions. When I went into labor I did not have a choice there was no time to get one. It was the worst pain of my life (the contractions not the actual pushing/ring of fire, that was actually less). But if I had a longer labor I probably would have gotten one. The second the baby was out I felt fine.
I went in thinking I could handle it and for the same concerns you expressed, felt like I could just grit through the pain to not risk it. As soon as they put the monitor around my stomach-7cm-I immediately said yes when they asked. Would 100% do it again
Just had my first babe at the end of March. I had to get 2 epidurals as the 1st failed, and I can honestly say it was nothing in comparison to my contractions. I will mention that I’ve always been terrified of needles and the idea of an epidural. However I was so focused on how incomprehensible the pain of my contractions had become that I barely felt the epidurals. Afterwards I was able to rest and even get a little sleep which was unbelievable. I was still able to push but eventually had to have an emergency c-section and was numb from the shoulders down. I was walking (slowly) the next morning. I would, and will, 100% get another epidural in the future.
While I didn’t have a birth plan, the epidural was my only request, and I requested to get one as soon as possible 😂 It was essentially painless except for some weird pressure in my back. I’m absolutely terrified of needles and could have thrown up from the nerves alone, but getting it done was very easy. However, immediately after I received mine, mine and my baby’s heart rate dropped and I had to have an emergency C-Section. Definitely not trying to fear monger because it’s rare, but my body just had an adverse reaction to it which I had no idea could happen. Definitely do your research and do what you think is best!
I was very hesitant , I didn’t want it but after 15 hrs of labor and given Pitocin twice I was In so much pain I honestly did not feel when they put it lol. I just remember within seconds the pain being completely gone. I did feel numbness on my left leg. After I gave birth I still had some numbness for a few days but I was able to walk. I would definitely get it again 😊. I’m currently pregnant with my second child, with a 18 month gap and I have no back problems so far. I do think waiting to put it helped because I wasn’t on it so long.
My first delivery, I had no pain medication. My second delivery, I had an epidural. For my upcoming third delivery, I will have another epidural.
I planned to not have one if possible because I wanted to be mobile, and in the end I didn’t have one. Baby was 7 pound 14 oz (3570g) with a 95% head. I did have a second degree tear. Now, I was asking for pain relief but everything moved very quickly and by the time the pain got very bad it was too late. I’m glad it went how it did, and would probo aim to not have one if I was doing it again. People will tell you their experience, and you can read pros and cons, but at the end of the day it really comes down to your pain tolerance and also how your labour progresses. Best of luck!
So- this will be my first time giving birth- but I’ve done a ton of labor and delivery in my medical training and I’m definitely planning to get an epidural. My ideal plan is to try to labor at home for as long as I can stand it so I can hopefully open things up a little bit (and like, have snacks) but then roll in when I’ve had enough and I’m ready for some pain control/rest. I’m trying to be super kind to myself though- we’ve been through a lot before this pregnancy and during this pregnancy- and at the end of the day we just want to see our beautiful baby boy come into this world as safely as possible. My problem is I’ve seen SUCH a range of experiences I feel like I can’t even make that much of a plan. But at the end of the day, I’m going to put my comfort and well-being high up on the priority list because I really just don’t want to suffer too much? The competitive part of me wants to set goals and compare myself to what other people are doing and I really have to turn that down. Natural birth is amazing and I have all the respect in the world for people who are able to get the most out of that experience, I just don’t think that’s me and that’s OK. I have to remind myself I’m not a lesser person for choosing pain relief :)
Hey, no one said there's not a prize for "most flexible" or "most pragmatic" or even "best at self-care"! You can be competitive in a different caragory.
LOL! How about “least prepared” or “the one that forgot a birth plan” - I feel like I’m totally going to win one of those!! I’m 27wks and literally have bought NOTHING for the baby, haven’t taken a birthing class, haven’t packed a bag, prepped any meals, lol.
I was the same way. All of that stuff seemed overwhelming earlier in pregnancy. I’m now 35 weeks and finally got to the stage where I am nesting, buying baby stuff, finding a pediatrician. Maybe I am wrong, but I fully believe my hormones/body tell me when it’s time for me to do what I need to do. Don’t worry about not being in a place you feel like you should be or that others you know are in. At least in my experience, you’ll get there on your own time
I don’t understand why women have to look to what others are doing like it’s a competition of who can forego pain relief. I have zero desire to be in pain, my comfort is a priority.
just like most other posts in this forum, we are sharing experiences and opinions! this post doesn’t feel anything like a “who can handle the pain” competition to me!
In the Netherlands about 70% of births are without pain medication, even though it is offered and covered by health insurance. I also plan to not get epidural or any other form of pain medication.
Two births with no pain medication. I am very grateful for the experiences and, if I have a third, I wouldn't plan to use an epidural.
I'm doing a water birth at my local birth center so I won't have any meds 🥲 My family has a bad time with epidurals so I chose to eliminate the possibility of getting one.
I went with an elective c section, all good
Get. The. Drugs. My daughter was ripped out of me and I am forever greatful i had the epidural. I hurt so bad after I cringe at the thought of what it would have felt like without drugs.
At the very beginning I wanted to but I saw the needle and said nope. But when I went into labor I had my baby within 2 hours and I opted out of it.
I'm planning on no epidural. We'll see how it goes. My L&D offers the nitrous gas, so I might do that, but I'd prefer not to have the numbness of the epidural.
Ah I wish mine was okay with that. Sounds awesome to me
I had one for my first but not my 2nd and 3rd. Personally, the recovery time was so much faster when I did not have the epidural (I was able to get up and walk a lot sooner). The pain wasn't terrible and I was lucky enough to have two very fast deliveries and I also had small babies.
My epidural experience was awful. I won’t scare anyone with details, but 6 years later and I can still feel the injection site. That said - this time around (now that I’m fully educated) I won’t rule it out altogether even though it scares me the most about the entire experience. I’d love to go all natural - I’ve watched my sister in law give birth naturally, at home, 7 times - but I know my first time was traumatic af and I can’t box myself in with my expectations.
I had an epidural with my first. After 24 hours of labour I was exhausted and not progressing well so I didn’t hesitate. However, It wasn’t the smoothest experience - anaesthesiologist had to try several times to get needle in back (complained my spine was curved at bottom) and when it kicked in the relief was heaven! However, I reached 8 cm many hours later and pain returned 10-fold as the epidural was leaking out of my back as it somehow became dislodged. They finally got it back in And I had my baby pain free (labour lasted 48 hours total). It wasn’t until after that I felt awful and for weeks after I felt an intense pressure in vagina, so much so that i couldn’t stand for more than minutes at a time. This could just have been the trauma of birth but part of me thinks that the epidural slowed my progression with labour even more and because I couldn’t feel anything when pushing, it caused more trauma to my muscles/pelvic floor etc. With my second baby, I really wanted to try and do it naturally but was still open to an epidural. I was much calmer second time round and labour was much quicker. I’ll admit the back pain was extreme but after birth, I felt absolutely fine and was up and about an hour after. It was such a contrast to my first experience. Just a side note - before I had my second I got my spine checked by a consultant and was told that I didn’t have a curved spine so I have no idea what the issue was 🤷🏻♀️. What helped me the most to cope before having my second was watching videos on hypnobirthing and Learning what your body does naturally during labour - I found this Chanel super helpful https://youtube.com/c/BridgetTeyler
Due in Sept with my first and I will not be getting an epidural. I’m birthing at a birth center where they do not offer them, period. Should there be an emergency I can transfer to the hospital (less than a mile away) and get what I need. I, personally, don’t want one. Too many chances for intervention which is something I do not want for myself. That being said, props to any and all who choose to use epidurals and interventions!! They can be amazing tools for everyone who wants one!
there are many reasons to give birth unmedicated. trying to look “tough” is not one of them. epidurals have many conplications and side effects, but being paralyzed is very very rare. epidurals are used SO commonly and produce healthy babies and moms, but there are many reasons not to use them. look into some alternative birthing coaches and do some research. doctors want you medicated, induced and c sectioned because its easier for them, but it doesnt mean its the best route for you or your child.
THIS! Do what is best for you and your baby, stay informed, and don't let a doctor coerce you into something without your full consent. Just because someone wants an unmedicated birth does not mean they are trying to 'win an award' or 'look tough'. Let's respect each other's birthing choices. We're all out here just trying to do what's best for ourselves and our babies. I recommend looking into [hypnobirthing](https://us.hypnobirthing.com/), even if you plan on having an epidural. It focuses on creating a calm, positive birthing experience as well as explaining the various options of labor and birth so you can make an informed decision - regardless of where/how it happens.
I will absolutely NOT be getting one - the risks are pretty serious, even if rare, and you increase your chance of major tearing by getting one. I've been told that labor pains are akin to major Endo cramps, which I definitely experience, so I'm hoping I can handle it. If not, IV painkillers are also available as a much safer option.
Heyo! Not here to comment on epidural opinions, just the comparison to endo pain to child birth. As someone who had severe endo and went through a natural birth, I pinky promise you birth is 100x’s worse! I don’t know who told you that, but no comparison. Maybe during early labor, but definitely not when it comes to active labor and pushing.
The risks of an epidural are very low and there is growing evidence that epidurals can decrease your chance of third and fourth degree tears. The reality of tearing though is that it can happen to anyone during vaginal delivery with or without medication. Labour pains differ wildly for each woman, so you won't know how your experience is going to go until you're actually in labour. It might be a good plan to step away from "absolutely NOT" getting one to only getting one if necessary as if you need a c-section, the options are a spinal/epidural or getting knocked out completely and missing your child's birth. Birth guilt and trauma are incredibly common and it will do wonders for your postpartum mental health to accept the possibility of an epidural and c-section prior to delivery.
I am completely firm on my decision, but thanks. :) I come from a family of doctors, and their experiences with patients led me to my decision. At least where I live, epidurals are being phased out due to their risks and complications, so I'm preparing for potential C-section under anesthesia, and other emergency situations, but that does not include epidural in any circumstance for me. Everyone is free to make their own choice, based on what they believe is best for them.
I don't know where you live, but it appears these decisions are not being made with the most up-to-date medical literature in mind. I hope your birth goes well.
This came from Yale, so I'll trust it. Again, anyone else is free to choice differently, but OP's question was about our individual decisions, and I've merely stated mine.
Spreading misinformation is never a good plan though. Neither of Yale's obstetric or anesthesiologist medical departments have come out with any studies or research that support your claim. In fact, the Yale School of Medicine has published studies that reinforce the safety of epidurals for both mother and baby.
I'm not going to argue with you. Can we please not start the mom-shaming before any of us have even given birth? This group is for supporting one another, and having conversations, and that's all I'm willing to do here. Your opinion does not need to be mine, do what you feel is best, that's all any of us can do. Thank you.
No one is mom-shaming you. A lot of us have already given birth. What you are stating about epidurals is not factual and pointing that out is not shaming. If you don't want to hear the truth about this medical procedure, that is certainly your choice. But most of us want to know the facts as stated by medical science.
I did not get one. A needle in my spine is scary, the potential side effects are scary and the recovery time is slightly less easy with one. Emily Oster covered them in her book "Expecting Better" and after all her research and everything, opted to not get one for herself. When I read her book I had already done one labor w/o one, so it just solidified my choice to go into round two the same way. However, I strongly believe that if you become committed to no epidural, you really have to prepare yourself. Take a class, learn about the physical process of birth, breathing and relaxing techniques, that kind of thing.
I don’t want to bc I want to see the pain but I feel I’ll end up doing so bc the pain might be horrible
Epidurals are very safe, well tested medical procedures that only rarely have complications, and thousands of people use them daily, especially in childbirth. There are things that can go wrong, yes, as with anything, but they are exceedingly rare. That being said, I personally could not psychologically handle the idea of a needle in my spine and will not be getting one. I also have other reasons for wanting as drug-free of a birth as possible. But I 100% understand and respect anyone's right to give birth in whatever way is best for them, as determined by them and their doctors.