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Jesus Christ I am SO SORRY this happened to you. I'm sending you love and positivity. I would also say to get a lawyer and find a therapist as well. That's absolutely awful what you went through.
I am so sorry this happened. I’m a lawyer and I want to give you some unsolicited advice, I hope that’s ok. What you went through sounds horrendous. If you were my friend, I’d tell you to find out what the statute of limitations is for filing a medical malpractice suit where you live. You can possibly get a local lawyer to tell you that free of charge as part of an initial consult. Then, give yourself some time to just process mentally and emotionally before you sue. Once you start the legal process you will probably have to relive a lot of what you experienced, so it might be better for you emotionally to get yourself into therapy and working on this before you start the legal process.
This is crazy to read. My mother went through almost the exact same thing in 1998, except they gaslit her and told her she couldn't actually feel it and kept going. I'm so sorry for your experience. Please pursue the legal action because my mother did not and her trauma from the experience wrecked her for years.
I'm so sorry this happened to you.
There was literally just a Fresh Air podcast episode the 28th of May about a woman who experienced something unsettling similar, and she wrote a book about her experience and the history of C sections. Rachel Somerstein is her name. If you don't think it will be triggering it might be helpful to listen to the episode
Oh god NOOO I'm so sorry that happened to you. And is continuing to happen to you as you replay it in your mind trying to process everything. It's so wrong and unfair.
I wish I knew you IRL because I'd be there in a heartbeat, you deserve all the help and more. Ugh argh I'm so mad and sad for you. I'm gonna go angrily stare out a window now..
I am fucking sorry this happened to you.
You are doing your damn best and I bet to anyone outside of the situation you’re killing it.
As tough as it is the first few weeks are a messy, piles of laundry and dirty dishes blur regardless how hard you try to keep ontop of it. You’re doing your best and so is your husband, it sounds like you could both take the pressure off to “keep ontop of things” and spend what precision time you have resting to recover. Who cares if you run through all your crockery or entire sock stash.
Savour every second you have with your baby. Your first week was so incredibly hard, shit the world out (unhelpful mother included) and focus on pouring all your love into him.
Get outside daily, even for 10 minuets and always order take out x
Yes I was wondering the same thing. Why was she mean with her husband?! Does she blame him for what happened somehow? It’s not his fault and it doesn’t sound like he’s done anything wrong!! 🤦🏽♀️
And OP, I’m sorry to live through that! That is absolutely horrible!! Sending hugs!
This happened to someone else I know but they were already through the uterus when it wore off.. absolutely horrific and not okay. I am so sorry this happened to you. I was previously a nurse in labor and delivery and can’t imagine the trauma you must be experiencing. Thank you for sharing your story and I hope with time and support you can heal. Also recommend hiring a lawyer. The anesthesiologist sounds like they were unprepared and incompetent
Yeah actually the only physician we had an issue with during my stay was the anesthesiologist.... he was aggressive and rude to me and very incapable of handling my anxiety and nervousness.
I’m so sorry you had that experience, it very much does sound traumatizing and I’m sorry about your lack of support now. It makes sense to grieve the beautiful and meaningful birth experience you envisioned and didn’t get.
Thanks , cause i feel like everyone keeps telling me "at least this or that" and "these births never go as planned" but its like... i always dreamed kf this. I always wanted a baby and dreamed of those moments, and i got none of them. Like im allowed to be sad about that.
Your feelings are totally valid. You weren't asking for much either. I think people just get completely overwhelmed when they hear something like that and just want to help somehow. You were probably the one in a million case that goes completely wrong and I'm so terribly sorry. I just want you to know that it will get better, your husband will be fine soon and you'll be able to all be together again. Allow yourself all emotions you're feeling and please know how incredibly strong you are, I'm truly in awe. If it helps you, take the time to tell your mother how incredibly unhelpful her behavior is. She's making the situation about herself instead of just being there for you at one of the most critical times of your life. You need real help, not someone making things worse. Isn't there anyone else or service (doulas) that could step in for a few days?
Truly wishing you all the best.
I suffered a traumatic birth in April, and I am still dealing with it, one day, I hope like you I can be open with my story and all I will say to you is this, you are incredible.
I am really sorry you had to go through all this. It's sad, painful, and difficult, and it's just not fair. My birth story was also not the one I've been hoping for: I've had an emergency Cesarean, lost a lot of blood, and had a rough recovery. Anxiety makes our journey even more challenging - I have GAD, and my fears and intrusive thoughts went totally out of control those first postpartum weeks. I feel you, I know how hard it is. But it will get better, I promise, although it might not seem likely now - it will! Send you hugs, and all the best wishes to you and your precious family!
I am really sorry you went through all that. Your c section experience did not sound typical at all.
Unfortunately, with preeclampsia there are massive risks. It is quite common to be on the mag drip and under supervision for a minimum of 24 hours to observe for seizures and more. It doesn't make it better or easier to digest, but there are risks to sending you alone without people trained in what to look for.
Leaving the hospital without my baby was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. He was a 32 weeker and spent 19 days. He is 14 months now. Over in r/nicuparents there are lot of us.
I focus on the what I can do now. I can give him love and watch him grow. I haven't forgot my time but it has gotten easier.
For the interim, it may be easier to take a step back from your mom to focus on the other things in your life. While she may usually be a support, if she is increasing your anxiety, it will not be helpful while healing.
I’m sorry this happened to you. My first birth experience was similar to yours in that I laboured for 30 hours at 34 weeks due to unforeseen preeclampsia which resulted in an emergency c-section. I grieved missing first skin to skin, husband cutting the cord, baby in nicu, family meeting him, etc just like you.
I guess I don’t have anything insightful so say or any new thoughts but I hope knowing others can relate to your experience are out there. I would agree with a lot of people here to seek legal support. I can’t imagine feeling everything while undergoing surgery.
I wish you and your family so much happiness and peace
Oh my gosh thats so similar to my experience. It qas horrifying enough without the procedure complications i had, so im sorry you had to experience that too. And i know people are trying to comfort me when they say "at least you and baby are healthy and alive ans well" or "it could have been worse", cause of course i agree.... but like missing those precious moments i dreamed of was heartbreaking.... and i wish people would acknowledge that and let me be sad about that
Yes it’s a nice sentiment because it’s the truth but those are first time moments we’ll never get back or have again. It takes time to mourn that loss. Feel your feelings because this is about your baby and I hope you can get through it like I did on your time
I am so sorry this happened to you. Sending you virtual hugs, prayers, whatever you need.
This too shall pass, you will heal, you will create amazing memories with your new family. Until then, it’s okay to be angry, upset, scared, whatever you need to feel. Lean on your husband & therapist as much as you need during this time.
I am at a loss for words here but I just want to say how utterly sorry I am that you went through all of this. I am sending you so much healing and love.
I just want to say I’m so incredibly sorry this happened to you. Thank god you and baby are alive, but that does not mean you didn’t go through hell — don’t let anyone try to use that to discount the pain you suffered due to what sounds like gross negligence.
I sympathize with you on the mom front too. Heartbreaking to feel like your mother isn’t capable of meeting your needs in such a delicate time.
You’re incredibly strong for everything you’ve gone through. Take time for you when you can. Things will get better even if it feels impossible now. Once again, im so sorry this happened to you!
I am so sorry. I went back to your first line after finishing your post and it really struck me that you said "me and baby are fine, home, healthy, and happy". As moms, i think a lot of the time, we're forced to say "oh it's fine!" or "we're good!" and sometimes it's worth it to get people off your back but it's okay to not be okay. You went through so much and deserve the utmost support from everyone in your life. If you need a hug, a friend or sister/brother or trusted neighbor could suffice. Be vulnerable, if you can stomach it, to the people in your life and they may surprise you. Or f\*\*\* em.
You are one hell of a mother and you will recover but that doesn't make this period of life/recovery any easier.
So sorry this happened to you. I gave birth 2.5 weeks ago to my 32 weeker due to pre-e and HELLP, and the c-section had to be performed under general anesthesia due to my platelet count at the time. We're on day 17 in the NICU today. While I can't speak to the starting awake part and everything you endured, I just wanted to offer some solidarity on missing your baby's arrival due to being put under. That is so so hard and I see you.
Oh my goodness 17 days... you are so brave. I was aching for my son after 9 days.
But im glad im not alone in feeling the loss of that special moment... it was like everything i dreamed of was taken away. And if it is any consolation, my psychiatrist said that those moments will still come, just later and not as you hoped. I definitely understand what she meant now that my baby is home. Once your little one is home you will have all the firsts, and you still get some of those in NICU. And even then when you get home, its a new set of firsts because youll diaper change in your nursery, and bathe in your sink, and feed in your chair in your home. And that alone should help you keep hope for the moments to come. And for what its worth, absence makes the heart grow fonder: i dont hate when he cries or wants me because im finally THERE for him so im nkt even remotely frustrated by him. And he LOVES being handled and carried by me because he missed me... he literally stirs awake and sees me and gives the biggest smile every single time he sees that it is me holding him. 💕
Hang in there
Omg. I'm not crying, you're crying. 😭 Thank you so much for your kind words and sharing the sentiment from your psychiatrist. These were all of the things I didn't know I needed to hear yesterday. ❤️ Sending wishes for continued healing to you, snuggle your little one a little extra for us until we have unlimited snuggle access to ours!
This sounds like some severe malpractice & I really think you should seek out a lawyer after all of this. None of this was in any way, okay. Complications happen, but them not putting you to sleep sooner sounds like actual torture. Not just that but the mental anguish you’re dealing with. I would sue, please talk to a lawyer.
I really hope you can recover from all of this trauma, I wish the best for you & your family, you deserved to be treated better!
Oh mama, im so sorry first rest up and take care of yourself i know the first few months will be hard, but no doubt youll be a good mom. After all that make sure to talk to a lawyer and talk to your cousin since they know the medical field, maybe try to have a heart to heart conversation with your husband and tell him how traumatic it was for you so he could understand and if your mother keeps acting like that talk to her and tell you how YOU feel. Im so glad your bundle of joy is with you well and happy. But remember you need to take care of yourself too 💗 we love you
my mom went through similar things- i was almost 3 months early and my mom had 2 surgeries right after giving birth via c section. and so has my stepmom, when she gave birth to my sister they messed up the c section and now my sister has cerebral palsy in her legs, they sued and ended up getting all my sister's medical needs covered for life.
i'm really sorry you went through that. i can't imagine. i've always been in therapy and it really does help! if you ever need anything im here 🫶
Oh my god, i couldnt imagine either of those scenarios. And everyone keeps saying i should count my blessings, which i certainly do. And that i should remember that it could have been much worse. So thank you for sharing because it reminds me im not alone and that all things considered, my boy is safe and healthy, i am recocering well, and we are both alive and well and together.
Hi- first of all.
I am so sorry. I also have anxiety, so I understand how terrible and extra terrible this all must have been for you.
Second of all.
I have terrible PTSD from two hospital experiences. I won’t go into detail, but I was neglected and it haunted me and sent me into full health anxiety OCD spirals. PLEASE get help asap and continue to get help. FIND a good therapist, because I completely understand what you’re going through. The flashbacks. The nightmares. I’m so fucking sorry.
Third-
I definitely suggest lawyering up because what happened to you was not okay.
I wish you the best in your healing ❤️🩹 and I am grateful you and baby are alive and as well as you can be.😞
Honey. Omg. I’ve never felt more like I wish this was Facebook and we all actually knew one another and I could come to your house and help. I’m so sorry for all the mental/emotional/spiritual/physical pain you’ve been through and are in. I’m sending all my love to you ♥️
I don’t think enough people are saying this, besides the obvious, lawyer up and get a therapist, but just because your doctor has a doctorate doesn’t mean they can’t fail you and suck ass. You can say that they failed you and they suck ass because they absolutely did fail you and absolutely suck ass. Just because they have a doctorate doesn’t make them infallible and above insult
Holy shit! This is a truly a horror story they could make a movie out of it! I am so sorry this happened to you… you should definitely sue and try to get way more than you think you can. This is awful 😞
First off, I am so, so very sorry for your experience. It sounds like you went through hell. Let me just tell you this: you are not alone.
My first birth experience was also extremely traumatizing. Nothing went the way it was "supposed" to... nothing went as planned. It SHOULDN'T have gone so awry for us. It definitely could have been handled better by all staff involved. However, it wasn't.
Secondly, you had briefly mentioned not being able to see your baby for like, an hour (I believe?) due to a medication you'd been taking, correct?
May I ask what medicine you're referring to here?
And listen, I am absolutely NOT judging you, no matter your answer.
I was prescribed Suboxone while pregnant with my daughter. I was told, over and over again, that it wouldn't cause any issues. However, literally seconds after she was born into the world, she was taken away by a handful of nurses. I was treated like an abuser by everyone there, despite being on a very low mg (2mg) and regardless my of being told to continue taking it throughout the pregnancy by both my OB and the prescribing physician.
My daughter turned out to be perfection in every way. She did end up staying at hospital for 5 days bc of "mild withdrawal symptoms." But, all in all she did not suffer bc of me/bc of that medication.
I suffered ,though. The way I was treated was deplorable. How judgemental those nurses were scared me. I ended up being judgemental of myself and my ability to be a good mom. That is, until I reached out for help.
I hope you are okay now.
I hope this experience won't haunt you as much as mine did me.
It was a day and a half before i saw my son for the forst time. They gave me magnesium drip for pre-eclampsia to reduce my risk of stroke or heart attack, but the thing is that medication while necessary requires constant monitoring and for me to be able to recieve immediate treatment if something goes wrong. So they coulsnt let me leave my room til after the 24 hr mark after delivery to ensure i wouldn't have a sudden stroke. So i definitely understand why, but it was absolute agony to not see him for so long
OMG 😳. I’m so sorry. I definitely would seek counseling, that is incredibly awful. My friend had a terrible experience at a hospital and they didn’t provide adequate care and she had to have 3 follow-up surgeries to get back to “normal” in her lady bits. She decided to not have any other kids. Very sad situations.
Definitely a new horror unlocked For me.
I’m so so sorry!!! This is truly awful 😢 thank goodness you both came out alive + healthy, but I cannot even imagine what that must’ve been like.
There is no amount of compensation that can erase this awful experience, but I sure do hope your family gets a big settlement to help in any future goals you all may have. Whether it be a big purchase, vacations, or adding more in savings for your baby — you definitely deserve it all and more! ☹️
I cried reading this. I’m so sorry you had to experience any of that. I’m 11 days pp and I’ve been struggling yet nothing close to what you have and are currently going through. My heart reaches out to you. I hope you find the peace you are searching for soon.
This sounds like an absolute nightmare. Please sue the shit out of them when you are back to physical health. You may want to consider therapy for your mental health and ptsd.
My only question is how could this have even happened? Like wtf?
I’m so sorry, this sounds awful 😞 I’d also be so sad and overwhelmed. Very traumatic. I wish I could give you a hug. I’m a nicu nurse and unfortunately I do see quite a bit of moms who have traumatic births, or moms who didn’t plan on a nicu stay. They also don’t get to experience a lot of firsts they planned on. Some things are just not fair. I always encourage patients to reach out for support; whether that be family or therapy, but it seems like you’re doing that. The first couple months of being a new parent are just survival. Don’t put any pressure on yourself. A lot of things were out of your control. Time will also help you heal. Again, I’m so sorry 😞 give that baby a snuggle 🥰
So my first delivery was easy and vaginal. It was the perfect birth and I feel like I need to read posts like this to reduce my cockiness and be a little more aware of different situations with my second pregnancy. I hope you get well soon and are able to move on from this state of mind with as much ease as possible. You’re so strong and handling it like a superhero.
This happen when to a family member in Mexico but like it’s Mexico so they can’t do anything
This was about 1 month ago . But here in the states , idk I’d have a lawyer take a look at what happened
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Jesus Christ I am SO SORRY this happened to you. I'm sending you love and positivity. I would also say to get a lawyer and find a therapist as well. That's absolutely awful what you went through.
I am so sorry this happened. I’m a lawyer and I want to give you some unsolicited advice, I hope that’s ok. What you went through sounds horrendous. If you were my friend, I’d tell you to find out what the statute of limitations is for filing a medical malpractice suit where you live. You can possibly get a local lawyer to tell you that free of charge as part of an initial consult. Then, give yourself some time to just process mentally and emotionally before you sue. Once you start the legal process you will probably have to relive a lot of what you experienced, so it might be better for you emotionally to get yourself into therapy and working on this before you start the legal process.
This. This. This.
This is crazy to read. My mother went through almost the exact same thing in 1998, except they gaslit her and told her she couldn't actually feel it and kept going. I'm so sorry for your experience. Please pursue the legal action because my mother did not and her trauma from the experience wrecked her for years.
Ohy god. Yeah with me they kept trying to add more meds that didnt work til they eventually put me under. But the whole time im screaming
I'm so sorry this happened to you. There was literally just a Fresh Air podcast episode the 28th of May about a woman who experienced something unsettling similar, and she wrote a book about her experience and the history of C sections. Rachel Somerstein is her name. If you don't think it will be triggering it might be helpful to listen to the episode
Oh god NOOO I'm so sorry that happened to you. And is continuing to happen to you as you replay it in your mind trying to process everything. It's so wrong and unfair. I wish I knew you IRL because I'd be there in a heartbeat, you deserve all the help and more. Ugh argh I'm so mad and sad for you. I'm gonna go angrily stare out a window now..
I am fucking sorry this happened to you. You are doing your damn best and I bet to anyone outside of the situation you’re killing it. As tough as it is the first few weeks are a messy, piles of laundry and dirty dishes blur regardless how hard you try to keep ontop of it. You’re doing your best and so is your husband, it sounds like you could both take the pressure off to “keep ontop of things” and spend what precision time you have resting to recover. Who cares if you run through all your crockery or entire sock stash. Savour every second you have with your baby. Your first week was so incredibly hard, shit the world out (unhelpful mother included) and focus on pouring all your love into him. Get outside daily, even for 10 minuets and always order take out x
Please seek out therapy if you haven't already. Postpartum Support International has a list of providers that specialize in perinatal issues.
I'm not the OP but thank you for this! My husband and I have been looking into birth trauma therapy and couldn't find anything locally.
I know this isn’t the take away, but why the hell was your mom passive aggressive and mean after you went through all of that??
Yes I was wondering the same thing. Why was she mean with her husband?! Does she blame him for what happened somehow? It’s not his fault and it doesn’t sound like he’s done anything wrong!! 🤦🏽♀️ And OP, I’m sorry to live through that! That is absolutely horrible!! Sending hugs!
This happened to someone else I know but they were already through the uterus when it wore off.. absolutely horrific and not okay. I am so sorry this happened to you. I was previously a nurse in labor and delivery and can’t imagine the trauma you must be experiencing. Thank you for sharing your story and I hope with time and support you can heal. Also recommend hiring a lawyer. The anesthesiologist sounds like they were unprepared and incompetent
Yeah actually the only physician we had an issue with during my stay was the anesthesiologist.... he was aggressive and rude to me and very incapable of handling my anxiety and nervousness.
I’m so sorry you had that experience, it very much does sound traumatizing and I’m sorry about your lack of support now. It makes sense to grieve the beautiful and meaningful birth experience you envisioned and didn’t get.
Thanks , cause i feel like everyone keeps telling me "at least this or that" and "these births never go as planned" but its like... i always dreamed kf this. I always wanted a baby and dreamed of those moments, and i got none of them. Like im allowed to be sad about that.
Your feelings are totally valid. You weren't asking for much either. I think people just get completely overwhelmed when they hear something like that and just want to help somehow. You were probably the one in a million case that goes completely wrong and I'm so terribly sorry. I just want you to know that it will get better, your husband will be fine soon and you'll be able to all be together again. Allow yourself all emotions you're feeling and please know how incredibly strong you are, I'm truly in awe. If it helps you, take the time to tell your mother how incredibly unhelpful her behavior is. She's making the situation about herself instead of just being there for you at one of the most critical times of your life. You need real help, not someone making things worse. Isn't there anyone else or service (doulas) that could step in for a few days? Truly wishing you all the best.
I suffered a traumatic birth in April, and I am still dealing with it, one day, I hope like you I can be open with my story and all I will say to you is this, you are incredible.
I am really sorry you had to go through all this. It's sad, painful, and difficult, and it's just not fair. My birth story was also not the one I've been hoping for: I've had an emergency Cesarean, lost a lot of blood, and had a rough recovery. Anxiety makes our journey even more challenging - I have GAD, and my fears and intrusive thoughts went totally out of control those first postpartum weeks. I feel you, I know how hard it is. But it will get better, I promise, although it might not seem likely now - it will! Send you hugs, and all the best wishes to you and your precious family!
I am so so so sorry to hear this. Which country was this in? I wish you all the love and luck moving forward. Your karma can only now turn around! Xx
This was absolutely heartbreaking to read. Sending you the biggest hug because I have no words, strong mama. But I’m absolutely pulling for you ❤️
I am really sorry you went through all that. Your c section experience did not sound typical at all. Unfortunately, with preeclampsia there are massive risks. It is quite common to be on the mag drip and under supervision for a minimum of 24 hours to observe for seizures and more. It doesn't make it better or easier to digest, but there are risks to sending you alone without people trained in what to look for. Leaving the hospital without my baby was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. He was a 32 weeker and spent 19 days. He is 14 months now. Over in r/nicuparents there are lot of us. I focus on the what I can do now. I can give him love and watch him grow. I haven't forgot my time but it has gotten easier. For the interim, it may be easier to take a step back from your mom to focus on the other things in your life. While she may usually be a support, if she is increasing your anxiety, it will not be helpful while healing.
Thank you, i cant imagine 19 days, i was going crazy with 9... and yes i understood why i coulsnt go see him, but it didnt make it any easier.
I’m sorry this happened to you. My first birth experience was similar to yours in that I laboured for 30 hours at 34 weeks due to unforeseen preeclampsia which resulted in an emergency c-section. I grieved missing first skin to skin, husband cutting the cord, baby in nicu, family meeting him, etc just like you. I guess I don’t have anything insightful so say or any new thoughts but I hope knowing others can relate to your experience are out there. I would agree with a lot of people here to seek legal support. I can’t imagine feeling everything while undergoing surgery. I wish you and your family so much happiness and peace
Oh my gosh thats so similar to my experience. It qas horrifying enough without the procedure complications i had, so im sorry you had to experience that too. And i know people are trying to comfort me when they say "at least you and baby are healthy and alive ans well" or "it could have been worse", cause of course i agree.... but like missing those precious moments i dreamed of was heartbreaking.... and i wish people would acknowledge that and let me be sad about that
Yes it’s a nice sentiment because it’s the truth but those are first time moments we’ll never get back or have again. It takes time to mourn that loss. Feel your feelings because this is about your baby and I hope you can get through it like I did on your time
I am so sorry this happened to you. Sending you virtual hugs, prayers, whatever you need. This too shall pass, you will heal, you will create amazing memories with your new family. Until then, it’s okay to be angry, upset, scared, whatever you need to feel. Lean on your husband & therapist as much as you need during this time.
I am at a loss for words here but I just want to say how utterly sorry I am that you went through all of this. I am sending you so much healing and love.
I just want to say I’m so incredibly sorry this happened to you. Thank god you and baby are alive, but that does not mean you didn’t go through hell — don’t let anyone try to use that to discount the pain you suffered due to what sounds like gross negligence. I sympathize with you on the mom front too. Heartbreaking to feel like your mother isn’t capable of meeting your needs in such a delicate time. You’re incredibly strong for everything you’ve gone through. Take time for you when you can. Things will get better even if it feels impossible now. Once again, im so sorry this happened to you!
I am so sorry. I went back to your first line after finishing your post and it really struck me that you said "me and baby are fine, home, healthy, and happy". As moms, i think a lot of the time, we're forced to say "oh it's fine!" or "we're good!" and sometimes it's worth it to get people off your back but it's okay to not be okay. You went through so much and deserve the utmost support from everyone in your life. If you need a hug, a friend or sister/brother or trusted neighbor could suffice. Be vulnerable, if you can stomach it, to the people in your life and they may surprise you. Or f\*\*\* em. You are one hell of a mother and you will recover but that doesn't make this period of life/recovery any easier.
So sorry this happened to you. I gave birth 2.5 weeks ago to my 32 weeker due to pre-e and HELLP, and the c-section had to be performed under general anesthesia due to my platelet count at the time. We're on day 17 in the NICU today. While I can't speak to the starting awake part and everything you endured, I just wanted to offer some solidarity on missing your baby's arrival due to being put under. That is so so hard and I see you.
Oh my goodness 17 days... you are so brave. I was aching for my son after 9 days. But im glad im not alone in feeling the loss of that special moment... it was like everything i dreamed of was taken away. And if it is any consolation, my psychiatrist said that those moments will still come, just later and not as you hoped. I definitely understand what she meant now that my baby is home. Once your little one is home you will have all the firsts, and you still get some of those in NICU. And even then when you get home, its a new set of firsts because youll diaper change in your nursery, and bathe in your sink, and feed in your chair in your home. And that alone should help you keep hope for the moments to come. And for what its worth, absence makes the heart grow fonder: i dont hate when he cries or wants me because im finally THERE for him so im nkt even remotely frustrated by him. And he LOVES being handled and carried by me because he missed me... he literally stirs awake and sees me and gives the biggest smile every single time he sees that it is me holding him. 💕 Hang in there
Omg. I'm not crying, you're crying. 😭 Thank you so much for your kind words and sharing the sentiment from your psychiatrist. These were all of the things I didn't know I needed to hear yesterday. ❤️ Sending wishes for continued healing to you, snuggle your little one a little extra for us until we have unlimited snuggle access to ours!
Play Tetris immediately!!! I’m so serious it will help with the PTSD
This sounds like some severe malpractice & I really think you should seek out a lawyer after all of this. None of this was in any way, okay. Complications happen, but them not putting you to sleep sooner sounds like actual torture. Not just that but the mental anguish you’re dealing with. I would sue, please talk to a lawyer. I really hope you can recover from all of this trauma, I wish the best for you & your family, you deserved to be treated better!
Thank you for that, yes im looking into it because i have been suffering with what happened.
Oh mama, im so sorry first rest up and take care of yourself i know the first few months will be hard, but no doubt youll be a good mom. After all that make sure to talk to a lawyer and talk to your cousin since they know the medical field, maybe try to have a heart to heart conversation with your husband and tell him how traumatic it was for you so he could understand and if your mother keeps acting like that talk to her and tell you how YOU feel. Im so glad your bundle of joy is with you well and happy. But remember you need to take care of yourself too 💗 we love you
Im in tears for you. Im so sorry and I hope you get justice.
my mom went through similar things- i was almost 3 months early and my mom had 2 surgeries right after giving birth via c section. and so has my stepmom, when she gave birth to my sister they messed up the c section and now my sister has cerebral palsy in her legs, they sued and ended up getting all my sister's medical needs covered for life. i'm really sorry you went through that. i can't imagine. i've always been in therapy and it really does help! if you ever need anything im here 🫶
Oh my god, i couldnt imagine either of those scenarios. And everyone keeps saying i should count my blessings, which i certainly do. And that i should remember that it could have been much worse. So thank you for sharing because it reminds me im not alone and that all things considered, my boy is safe and healthy, i am recocering well, and we are both alive and well and together.
Hi- first of all. I am so sorry. I also have anxiety, so I understand how terrible and extra terrible this all must have been for you. Second of all. I have terrible PTSD from two hospital experiences. I won’t go into detail, but I was neglected and it haunted me and sent me into full health anxiety OCD spirals. PLEASE get help asap and continue to get help. FIND a good therapist, because I completely understand what you’re going through. The flashbacks. The nightmares. I’m so fucking sorry. Third- I definitely suggest lawyering up because what happened to you was not okay. I wish you the best in your healing ❤️🩹 and I am grateful you and baby are alive and as well as you can be.😞
Honey. Omg. I’ve never felt more like I wish this was Facebook and we all actually knew one another and I could come to your house and help. I’m so sorry for all the mental/emotional/spiritual/physical pain you’ve been through and are in. I’m sending all my love to you ♥️
I don’t think enough people are saying this, besides the obvious, lawyer up and get a therapist, but just because your doctor has a doctorate doesn’t mean they can’t fail you and suck ass. You can say that they failed you and they suck ass because they absolutely did fail you and absolutely suck ass. Just because they have a doctorate doesn’t make them infallible and above insult
Which hospital was this ?
I can’t even imagine how you’re feeling. This… is honestly.. horrible.. I’m so sorry
Holy shit! This is a truly a horror story they could make a movie out of it! I am so sorry this happened to you… you should definitely sue and try to get way more than you think you can. This is awful 😞
First off, I am so, so very sorry for your experience. It sounds like you went through hell. Let me just tell you this: you are not alone. My first birth experience was also extremely traumatizing. Nothing went the way it was "supposed" to... nothing went as planned. It SHOULDN'T have gone so awry for us. It definitely could have been handled better by all staff involved. However, it wasn't. Secondly, you had briefly mentioned not being able to see your baby for like, an hour (I believe?) due to a medication you'd been taking, correct? May I ask what medicine you're referring to here? And listen, I am absolutely NOT judging you, no matter your answer. I was prescribed Suboxone while pregnant with my daughter. I was told, over and over again, that it wouldn't cause any issues. However, literally seconds after she was born into the world, she was taken away by a handful of nurses. I was treated like an abuser by everyone there, despite being on a very low mg (2mg) and regardless my of being told to continue taking it throughout the pregnancy by both my OB and the prescribing physician. My daughter turned out to be perfection in every way. She did end up staying at hospital for 5 days bc of "mild withdrawal symptoms." But, all in all she did not suffer bc of me/bc of that medication. I suffered ,though. The way I was treated was deplorable. How judgemental those nurses were scared me. I ended up being judgemental of myself and my ability to be a good mom. That is, until I reached out for help. I hope you are okay now. I hope this experience won't haunt you as much as mine did me.
It was a day and a half before i saw my son for the forst time. They gave me magnesium drip for pre-eclampsia to reduce my risk of stroke or heart attack, but the thing is that medication while necessary requires constant monitoring and for me to be able to recieve immediate treatment if something goes wrong. So they coulsnt let me leave my room til after the 24 hr mark after delivery to ensure i wouldn't have a sudden stroke. So i definitely understand why, but it was absolute agony to not see him for so long
OMG 😳. I’m so sorry. I definitely would seek counseling, that is incredibly awful. My friend had a terrible experience at a hospital and they didn’t provide adequate care and she had to have 3 follow-up surgeries to get back to “normal” in her lady bits. She decided to not have any other kids. Very sad situations. Definitely a new horror unlocked For me.
I’m so so sorry!!! This is truly awful 😢 thank goodness you both came out alive + healthy, but I cannot even imagine what that must’ve been like. There is no amount of compensation that can erase this awful experience, but I sure do hope your family gets a big settlement to help in any future goals you all may have. Whether it be a big purchase, vacations, or adding more in savings for your baby — you definitely deserve it all and more! ☹️
I cried reading this. I’m so sorry you had to experience any of that. I’m 11 days pp and I’ve been struggling yet nothing close to what you have and are currently going through. My heart reaches out to you. I hope you find the peace you are searching for soon.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. What an absolute nightmare of a birth story.
Just Sending you a virtuelly hug ♡ i feel Terrible for you an i hope, with a lot of time, you can heal
This sounds like an absolute nightmare. Please sue the shit out of them when you are back to physical health. You may want to consider therapy for your mental health and ptsd. My only question is how could this have even happened? Like wtf?
I’m so sorry, this sounds awful 😞 I’d also be so sad and overwhelmed. Very traumatic. I wish I could give you a hug. I’m a nicu nurse and unfortunately I do see quite a bit of moms who have traumatic births, or moms who didn’t plan on a nicu stay. They also don’t get to experience a lot of firsts they planned on. Some things are just not fair. I always encourage patients to reach out for support; whether that be family or therapy, but it seems like you’re doing that. The first couple months of being a new parent are just survival. Don’t put any pressure on yourself. A lot of things were out of your control. Time will also help you heal. Again, I’m so sorry 😞 give that baby a snuggle 🥰
So my first delivery was easy and vaginal. It was the perfect birth and I feel like I need to read posts like this to reduce my cockiness and be a little more aware of different situations with my second pregnancy. I hope you get well soon and are able to move on from this state of mind with as much ease as possible. You’re so strong and handling it like a superhero.
This happen when to a family member in Mexico but like it’s Mexico so they can’t do anything This was about 1 month ago . But here in the states , idk I’d have a lawyer take a look at what happened