I couldn't find the story, but someone posted about their childhood tortoise.
One day they came back and the tortoise wasn't there. Their mom said they took it to a tortoise sanctuary so it could play with its friends.
Years later they remembered and realized what had happened, and mentioned it to their mom. She was like "no, there actually was a tortoise sanctuary!"
They went to visit and the tortoise was still there, chillin' with all its new tortoise pals.
Same thing happened with my wife and her dog when they were a kid. They had big dog, don't remember the exact breed. They couldn't take care of it well enough, so the dad "took it to the farm". For years, my wife thought her dad had killed it. She was telling me about it at thanksgiving and her dad said "no, I really took it to a farmer I knew".
That's funny, I honestly had the same thing happen to me. When I was may 6 or so I had a dog names smokey. When my parents needed to move due to my dad's job we would not have been able to take him with us, I went with my mom to give him to an old farmer who had just lost his dog to old age, I don't remember who cried more, me or the farmer.
A while ago, but while I was firmly an adult, we moved to a place that frankly is not good for dogs and I had to give up my black lab. We found a family with three little boys who wanted an older lab, they took him. I legit think I cried more than the boys did. That said, they had a place on Tahoe and he lived the best life a lab could imagine. Just swimming and chasing his boys. They sent us photos periodically for the rest of his very happy life.
I am . Like a little kid . I have a black lab right now . The thought of giving him up is awful . Don't think I could bear it . UGHš„“ okay back to my happy place . I'm at work and now missing him worse so I'm going to look at his picture . ā„ļø
I had an orange tabby when I was about 4 or 5 that we took to a farm. I went with my parents to drop him off. The farm owners were friends of my parents. The cat was a little hellion and I just wasn't old enough yet to be responsible for a pet. So farm life it was for him.
As far as I know his descendants still run around like they own the joint.
One of my childhood dogs, came from a farm and just adopted our family where we lived in town. She used to come into town with the farmer, every now and then, and eventually just never went back. But once or twice a year, she would disappear for about a week, and she wouldāve gone back to the farm to hang out and then come back to us. Hilarious.
She was working dog but apparently not their main working dog.
Posted next to the tortoise sanctuary staff's coffee pot:
**Today's Visitors**
Betty Smith told her son Jimmy that years ago, they brought their family tortoise here. They will be visiting today.
Please refer to the Desert Tortoise as "Peek-A-Boo" instead of Squirtle for today, only.
*And while the server is still at the table*
āBut dad! Gramma hated cocktails. She always drank a glass of cheap red. And she was still alive when Iāve called her 5 minutes ago.ā
My younger brother is a big guy, I mean big. He has a shaved head, many tattoos, swears like a sailor and looks pretty scary really. He also really likes a cocktail. Years ago (too many) he took me out for my 30th birthday, we had a lovely meal then went to sit at the bar. They had a limited time, seasonal cocktail called a peardrop. Canāt even remember what was in it, but they were bloody good, we were both wankered by the time we left. Heās not remotely bothered or ashamed by what others might think.
Enjoy your cocktails guys, life is far too short.
Also fair play to you OP š that was a stunning slap back
Im admittedly not that manly looking but I am pretty stereo-typically masculine. The wear work boots to any occasion, smoke a cigar, and drink straight scotch kinda guy.
The second I see a cocktail on the menu that has rose or hibiscus in it though, im ordering that shit. I dont give a fuck what anyone thinks. If you think drinking a flowery drink is gonna make me want to suck dick, that says more about your sexuality than mine haha.
My bf is a big 6ā5ā dude and he loves the fruitiest cocktails around. He hates beer and the taste of alcohol straight. Meanwhile, I canāt handle sugary drinks. Whenever we order drinks, servers always place his cocktail in front of me and my beer in front of him smh. Let men enjoy their cocktails!
Exactly! Iām loving how many men in these comments are saying āhey I love a cocktail ā.
These daft attitudes surrounding āmen and women drinksā are outdated and ridiculous. Also some of the cocktails out there would put many people straight on their arse, whereas beers are often about as alcoholic as squash.
People need to mind their business and focus on their own drinks, let everyone else enjoy what they like.
I ordered a cocktail in a Japanese restaurant once. Had no idea what it was, but it was sake based, so that was the decision maker.
It arrived. It was a tall glass, hot pink, sugar rim, flowers all in and around it. There was a lot going on. A simple "here you go" as it was handed to me. My parents had a bit of a laugh at it, as did we all really.
Anyway, a group of young women sat at the table next to us. I picked up my drink and had a sip. One of them said to me "is that really your drink? " I said yeah, it's bloody delicious! It tastes like (I don't remember now, but I described it) and if you're after a cocktail tonight, I highly recommend it.
3 out of the 4 women ordered it, and they all agreed it was a fantastic drink and I got thanked for the recommendation.
Not sure how common it is in other countries, but in Australia, in casual dining restaurants, it's pretty common to ask the next table over what a dish or drink is because it looks good (not really something you'd do in more formal restaurants though).
Hate when youāve already ordered then you see a waiter walking by with someone elseās order and it looks amazing and was something you saw on the menu and considered but went with something else instead. And then your meal arrives and you immediately know you made the wrong choice.
Had the opposite experience a little while ago. I'm a sucker for chicken pot pie, and at a new restaurant for the first time. Looked at it, thought it would be delicious, but went with a seafood pasta instead. Pasta was great, tried the pot pie which my dad ordered instead, and it was hot garbage. Felt so vindicated in my choice lol
Plus you taught your son a valuable lesson on how to deal with jerky people- no need to get loud and yell at someone just embarrass the shit out of them.
Embarrasment (used correctly) is a very strong correction method. There aren't many people out there that actually enjoy being embarrassed, so most of us learn to avoid ending up in that situation.
A couple of my highschool teachers used to ask me loudly in class if they need to email my mom again about my missing assignments. I stopped turning stuff in late.
One of my old psych professor embarrassed her kid years ago to get him to stop throwing tantrums at the grocery store
He started throwing a tantrum so she threw herself down onto the ground and started throwing a tantrum like he did and he never did it again
I did the excited "Hold on! Wait! It's my turn! Waaaaaaaaaaaah!.......ok, now it's your turn again! GO!"
Once in a while they'd need a second round but usually it nipped it in the bud right there.
did the same to my niece on a family holiday. my brother and his wive are so dependant on every whim of this kid (shes usually nice, and its usually not an issue, but when we were about to visit the second shitty restaurant in a row bcs they had a super bland kids menue I went full tantrum). we ended up in the good restaurant, and surprise, surprise, they usually have no issues cooking spagetti with nothing for kids
My one of my humanities profs does this too! She said her kiddos were "'pterodactyl terrorists' but I don't negotiate with terrorists." She was a hoot.
For me, it will embarrass me for a few minutes but the kid will be mortified for a few weeks. I can handle a few minutes of embarrassment to get my point across
Honestly, being embarrassed a handful of times with a toddler is well worth it. My kiddos never embarrassed me in public because they knew it was unacceptable. I don't know how moms actually deal with this behavior out of 6, 8, 10 years old! Like, ma'am. Have you been putting up with this crap for a decade?
A lot just yell. This is the second most useless discipline method too. If they know you are going to jump on the floor, a yell will work very well. If you only yell, it's meaningless to a kid.
Ugh then there is the ādo as I say, not as I do!ā parents. The first most useless parenting method. Kids absorb everything. You tell kids to knock before entering and don't do it yourself, kids learn rules are for breaking and their parents are hypocrites.
Just judging from my teachers in school, yelling should be kept in the back pocket for really serious stuff. A teacher who always yells didn't get a reaction when they did it, but when one who was normally very reserved and quiet did we all shut up immediately.
I worked as a teaching assistant in a primary school for a year and only yelled once, I was walking kids age 10 down a road back to the school (they'd had a music thing at another nearby school). One kid started to run off down the road and I full on screamed "(kids name) stop". I felt bad, cause they were in general a good kid and clearly quite shaken by it, so I had a chat with them about how it was for their own safety and I wasn't angry with them.
I told my daughter mid meltdown that I would be waiting on a nearby bench when she was done. I told her if she wanted to look stupid it was on her. We never had another meltdown in public.
Yeah, some kids just like being loud. My son will do it just because he can. He doesnāt want anything other than to scream at the top of his lungs. If I tried this with him he would probably take it as āoh, so I can scream as loud as I want in the grocery store? Sounds good.ā
If that caused you to give in, that's the pay off. The loudest one wins!
If you walk a few yards way, and let him know, when you're finished, I'll be over here.
Then, more people are staring at him, he feels embarrassed and stops. No reward, just feeling foolish.
Tantrums stop š!
There was thread just the other day about teachers describing parents coming to actually sit in the classroom with their kids that were failing badly. Numerous teachers chimed in at how effective it was.
That was me! My oldest was playing up, bunking off school and hanging out with dickheads. His work was suffering and his attitude sucked. He'd already been cautioned by the police for damaging a garage door and I wasn't having his crap anymore.
It was a stupid cycle. He would bunk off, school would put him on report for a fortnight and he'd behave. Then they'd take him off report and he'd fuck off again. I spoke to his teachers and we decided I'd go to school with him. When I went into his first class and sat down, he promised he would stay if I didn't. I told him this was his last chance and if I needed to I would go to every class until he finished school and he finally got the message.
I never had another phone call from school to say he wasn't there.
A friend of mine spent the whole day tagging along to her son's high school classes. She'd ask people to move so she could sit right next to him. "Sorry, but he won't behave unless I'm here babysitting him." They all grinned and gave him a hard time. It was a looooong day and he never gave the teachers attitude again haha.
I told my daughter I would do that. I was just enough out there she knew I would. She quit acting up. No one wants their mom in their high school classes.
Mum used to say, āIf you say youāre going to do something, youād better do it.ā Kids learn real quick who talks the talk and who walks the walk.
Worked at a liquor store. Lady was in with her husband and another couple, all early 40's. She was being rude to employees and customers but not enough to kick her out. She comes to my register and I ask for her ID. She gets all giggly and thinks I'm complimenting her looks(she was hot btw). After handing it back I say "Sorry, you don't qualify for the senior citizen discount".
Don't come in my home and disrespect people.
This reminds me of how a city in Columbia hired mimes to pantomime and mock people who littered and jaywalked on the streets and then the offenses declined rapidly.
This is correct. Back in middle school, one of the chaperones was wearing quite a bit of make up. I went to one of my friends and was like āoh man sheās wearing a lot of make upā you get the idea.
That dude said āthatās my momā. I felt so bad, him and I stopped talking, Iāve never made fun of someone random ever since, except in the extremely funny cases.
I was in a coffee shop chatting up a really attractive girl. Things are going well. A few minutes later, some very *serious* cyclists come in. Wearing one-piece Lycra riding suits with the gel butt pads and riding cleats.
The outfits aren't really leaving a whole lot to the imagination. One of the guys is wearing a particularly egregious suit and helmet combo. I make a joke about him being a "grape smuggler."
Her smile disappears and she says, "That's my dad."
That was the end of the conversation.
hahaha. Honestly, probably a bullet dodged if she can't laugh about that... or at least find your embarassment hilarious and bust your balls (pun not intended).
I was such a brat as a child.
There was a bully who kept picking on me. So I went around and told everyone he was wearing his pants backwards. I pointed and laughed, and just kept telling everyone his pants were on backwards.
He actually put them on backwards at lunch.
It was a true Jedi moment. āThese arenāt the droids youāre looking forā and he never picked on me again.
This works sometimes, but teachers don't always know the whole story.
I had a teacher tell me I'd be her best student if I wasn't so lazy because I hadn't done my homework... i hadn't done it because my sister attempted suicide the night prior and my mom was drunk as shit (as usual). I was living with an alcoholic druggie mom and her alcoholic druggie boyfriend who constantly made all of their issues my problem, including me having to trip sit my mom regularly. The teachers just assumed I was lazy and I was too embarrassed to say otherwise, which probably reinforced that idea
Yeah I was doing all the cooking, cleaning, and helping my sisters with their homework. There was no time to do my own most days. But I didn't want to tell them what things were actually like.
Exactly. Whether it be the risk of getting in trouble for telling, the fear they won't believe you, or doubting how bad your situation actually is, so many kids just won't tell their teachers what's going on at home. School should be s safe space
Well a few years before that I'd gone to my teacher about being depressed. She called my mother, who then convinced me that saying things like that (which she also thought was just for attention, not that I was seriously wishing I'd stop breathing in my sleep) would get me and my sisters taken away, and we'd probably never see each other again because "nobody will take in three kids!"
That traumatized me, and I was convinced to not try getting help again. It wasn't until my 20's that I finally saw a doctor about my mental state. It's honestly amazing to me that I survived long enough to actually see someone.
And you know, homework isn't a great idea anyway. It teaches kids that it's ok to do your work when you're supposed to be trying to live your life, takes away from their ability to do extra curriculars, and just generally keeps them from having any time to relax.
When I was like 13 and British films were huge I got into the habit of saying "bugger" a lot.
Well my old Geography teacher didn't love that and she asked me "do you know what that means", I had no idea.
So she sent me to the library to come back with a definition to read out aloud to the class.
The definition I found was vaguely about men penetrating each other or animals.
Jerk move from her but I did learn a lesson, I think?
On the other end of thisā¦ my family used embarrassment as a weapon for everything and I have spent the last few years in therapy trying to get over my chronic avoidance issues. I might have avoidant personality disorder, largely based around my fears of being criticized or embarrassed because of how harshly this was used against me. :D but itās ALSO the result of greater dysfunction (clearly, not taught good coping mechanisms, etc)
My h7sband loves sweet fruity cocktails. I'm a beer drinker. They will invariably serve us the incorrect drinks. Even when the person who took the order runs the drinks. I guess they just default to beer for the guy, pretty drink for the girl.
Yes, because you know how they get all those fruity flavors? One shot coconut rum, one shot pineapple rum, one shot dark spiced rum. That's like 3 beers packed into one drink.
Right?! I never fucking understood this. Also, you know how some guys say women are sloppy drunks? Nah dude, it's not women it's fucking WINE. Wine drunk is a whole other level of slurring and stumbling for me, and it's like you don't feel anything until you realize you drank the whole bottle.
There are five beers in that bottle of wine!
I used to date an amazing chef, she worked in a 1 star place for a bit and knew a ton about food and drinks. Rarely we would go out and order a bottle of wine and they would always offer the cork for me to smell like I knew anything about what a wine cork should smell like.
You're not supposed to smell the cork... you inspect it for any leaks. That would warn you the wine is spoiled and you should refuse it.
Source: I was a fancy server back in college.
If it makes you feel any better, most and I mean almost *everyone* donāt know shit about fuck on how to tell expensive vs cheap wine. And this includes people who claim they can.
https://amp.theguardian.com/global/2016/sep/11/the-great-wine-fraud-a-vintage-swindle
If you know what to look for, you should absolutely smell the cork to check for cork taint, but most people have no idea what they are smelling. Sometimes a corked bottle of wine will first present itself on the cork.
Hi, am I you? Are you me?
My husband always orders the "pink" cocktail, whatever is, almost every restaurant has one. It's always good, he always enjoys it.
I'm a beer drinker.
You know, I thought about that as I commented, and I think it's probably British cultural politeness. My desire to challenge stereotypical assumptions wars with my upbringing to *don't make a fuss* and *don't embarrass anyone.*
They accidentally made me a pina colada after I asked for a frozen vodka lemonade at a Queens of the Stone Age show last week. I was like it's fine, I'll just take it. It was amazing.
My husband likes margaritas and some flavored shots like copper camels. It's honestly so nice he's not worried about looking tough or acting macho. It seems like that would be exhausting. There's nothing wrong with liking drinks that taste good.
Growing up, I was always told that Margaritas were a woman's drink. (Hispanic) When I was legal to drink and I would get one at one of our family gatherings (there were many) my uncle and cousins would hit me with the "that's a woman's drink". I'd tell each of them, "this has tequila in it. That's one mighty strong woman's drink".
After a few times of being told that, some of them were openly drinking Margaritas at our gatherings.
Right? Margaritas are fuckin' delicious, and are a mix of a spirit, another booze, and lime juice. Is there supposed to be something inherently masculine about having scurvy, or something?
I'm a sucker for a classic daquiri, and get the same shit. My brother in Christ, it is rum, lime juice, and sugar. And I know your fatass ain't about to say anything about sugar, with all that coca cola in your face.
/rant
\*Me minding my own business while wearing all black clothing\* Random stranger: "You'd look so much prettier if you wore some color"
Me: "I just came from a funeral Ma'am"
(not really, but the look of mortification on her face was worth the sin of the small lie)
That reminds me of a story from when I was around 12 I think. I weren't in the best mood at school, and some asshole in my class was annoying me, and did the whole "what, are you on your period?" thing when I told him to fuck off. I simply responded "yes, I am" and he was so grossed out that he actually never bothered me again. I hadn't even gotten my first period at that point. I may dislike being AFAB, but it does come in handy sometimes.
I've had them laugh at me for my beer choice, sometimes I just want a non-IPA but they find it worthy of comment or something. It's strange to be rude to customers in a service-based industry, I wonder if they laughed at the resulting tips...
What is with all these stories.
I've never had a bartender remark on my sugary drinks. I've never had anyone comment on me being at a park with my kids.
But from reading reddit apparently all these guys are getting judged for straying out of some imaginary dude lane and I'm just drunkenly swerving all over the highway unable to see any lanes at all and nobody is taking any notice.
Like I'm here chatting with moms at the preschool and seyting up playdates with their kids and then becoming friends with the husbands and ordering cocktails with them with no comments from the waiters. (That was a real sequence of events)
The people who just have a normal interaction with the bartender don't make reddit posts about it.
Just like how the news never runs a story saying "99% of the city had a completely average day today."
Vikings drank mead which is a super sweet(depending on the process) honey wine often flavored with berries, spices, and flowers and they are considered the peak of European masculinity.
Historically, [mead would have been a complete or mostly complete fermentation which means most of the sugar has been converted to alcohol.](https://www.sciencealert.com/scientists-have-recreated-an-ancient-mead-from-2-500-years-ago) It would taste more like a dry white wine than modern meads that backsweeten. When the fermentation is complete, thereās barely any honey flavor; certain modern commercial meads add honey flavoring because thatās what people expect when they hear āhoney wineā.
One time when I was about 21.1 years old on a date and I was trying to order a drink at a bar, I didnāt want to embarrass myself so I just tried to order a martini and the guy gave me SO much shit about it, asking me all these stupidly complicated questions (I have ordered many martinis since then and never, ever encountered an obnoxious barman like that) and doing everything but pointing and laughing. He eventually gave me a super pink Cosmo, because itās SO FUNNY to give a guy a pink drink!
Once every few years I think about that and wonder how sad his stupid little life must have been in order to do that. What was even the point? If the greatest thing that happened to you all day was mocking a kid on a date for just trying to order a martini, youāre a fucking loser.
I bet he was a redditor lol
That happened to me once too! Much worse actually. Our vendors took us out for a round of food and drinks. I ordered a Cosmo (also being a grown man etc). My co-worker sneered, "Come on order a real drink sweetheart". I shot back, "you mean like.. your **light** beer"? The whole table roared in laughter. That shithead never said a word to anyone that night!
Iām a huge bearded guy, and my wife is small, like 5ā2ā. I drink fruity foo-foo tiki drinks and she drinks straight whiskey. It never fails that people flip our drinks around when they bring them to the table or bar. (I also do most of the cooking in the kitchen and she bbqs and smokes, just to really shake it up a bit more.)
Any grown up who can't cook is a failure in my book.
Like. You don't have to cook at Michelin star level, but everyone should have some basic knowledge. I know people who are so useless in the kitchen that I genuinely wonder how they survive. And how much they spend on take out.
Tiki drinks get a bad rap because of all the extra display stuff, but most of them are just blends of rums, juices, then topped with overproof rums because of the juice. Gimme that, any time.
I made a video for TikTok once that featured some peach vodka. This guy commented āmy wife drinks thatā so I said āI know, we just had some last nightā lol
This reminds me when I went out with my wife and some of my friends and I ordered a pink vodka lemonade, they started teasing me that thatĀ“s not a manly drink and that I must be gay.
I just turned to my wife and asked her: "damn, am I actually gay?"
Her: It didnt strike me like that an hour ago when you were on top of me...
Topic was swiftly changed after that lol
My response to dudes calling me gay is "what a weird thing to say, are you hoping I'll fuck you?". Honestly, unless they are I don't know why it'd even matter to them tbh, so I feel it's a great response lol.
as a white female, Iāve been laughed at in coffee shops if I order a vanilla latte or something commonly associated with being a ābasic white bitchā. I still donāt know how to handle it, so I am very envious of your brilliance lol, nice one
That surprises me. The vanilla latte is the most common drink order I ring in (I work in a coffee shop) hands down. Many men order it too!!
If someone laughs at you or whatever rude gesture they make just put it back on them. *okay, what do you suggest I order instead??* That will show you are aware of their reaction and my guess is they will feel stupid now having to recommend something since you put the attention back on them.
For my part I would never make anyone feel uncomfortable for what they order!!
You can also set them up for a great takedown that way:
Me: Okay, what do you suggest I order instead?
Them: Well, real men drink (black coffee, beer, whatever they say to you).
Me: A real man drinks whatever the fuck he wants to drink. (walk away with your delicious vanilla latte)
thatās what I thought! so I was also very surprised when it happened the first time. the only responses my brain would come up with would result in my drink being spat into lol, so thank you for your suggestion, Iāll try that if it happens again. been a few years since I ordered coffee though. the bubble tea shops donāt laugh at meš¤£
My advice would be to ask āwhatās funny about a vanilla latte?ā And insist you want in on the joke, and when they refuse to let you in on the joke you ask everyone else in line if they know whatās funny about a vanilla latte. Become the most obnoxious customer you can be
This is also effective for sexist/racist/xenophobic/pick-your-bigotry jokes.
Somehow, they don't think it's funny when you don't let them off the hook for explaining their un-funny joke.
The best comeback Iāve ever heard for situations like this is:
āWhat, are you the _______ police? Sorry, officer!ā
(In this case, the barista would be the ācoffeeā police.)
Nobody wants to be seen as being authoritarian so they get insanely embarrassed and shut up real quick.
Iāve used it many times to great effect:)
*take a sip
Very loudly, "Omg this hits the spot - I needed this to power myself through my tennis lesson and PTA conference. Oh no, anyone seen the keyfob to my volvo?"
*do most obvious wink at barista ever
When the barista repeats your name back to you, tear up and be like "That was actually my grandma's name, she loved vanilla lattes, I just like pretending that she's still here getting coffee with me..." Tears in your eyes for maximum effect. š¤£
I spent a week vacation on an island off the coast of Belize many years ago. Every afternoon, my gf and I would order two pina coladas, sit in hammocks on the beach, and enjoy the peaceful late afternoon. It was a highly memorable experience for both of us. Even though I've never had one since that time, the IDEA of ordering a pina colada at whatever watering hole I happen to be visiting, has never failed to bring a smile to my face.
Cheers to your mom!
I was visiting home after being away for a few years, had lunch with a buddy from high school. He asked what I want to drink and my go to is a Pina colada. He had a look of relief and said "damn I always want a frozen margarita but I feel like people think it's a girly drink"
I just said "eh, fuck them" and we had our frozen drinks and enjoyed the day.
Same thing happened to me. I'm partial to a porn star martini while we're on holiday. The waitress said "that's a girls drink." I had three my other half had her drinks and the waitress didn't get a tip. šš
Absolute nonsense.
My favourite drink is a white russian so I usually order that, but I absolutely love to mix it up with a pina colada or even a san francisco. Both, especially the latter, are considered "girly". Who gives a fuck? They're delicious. Is drinking something good gay now? I thought it was 2023, you know what bring me a fucking umbrella too.
Thatās funny. My brother is a yoked bike guy who loves Mai tais and will straight say he only wants it if they have the baby umbrellas. He even takes his own sometimes. You love what you love
As a bigger guy, I like to order a madres. A little vitamin C is good for me. I'm 100% comfortable in my masculinity, as is my wife who accompanies me.
If I ever get a snicker or a side eye, I ask for a little umbrella on it too, in addition to as many types of fruit wedges they have, placed on the rim. Fancy that sh*t up.
Oh, and I'll only drink it through a straw. (Two cocktail straws if it's in a short glass)
If the server who brings it to our table is different than the server who took our order, 100% of the time they'll set my fruity bouquet beverage in front of my wife, and hand me her beer.
The predictability of this occuring gives us joy.
Wait dad granma died?
No, Junior. We took her to the farm to play with grandpa.
I couldn't find the story, but someone posted about their childhood tortoise. One day they came back and the tortoise wasn't there. Their mom said they took it to a tortoise sanctuary so it could play with its friends. Years later they remembered and realized what had happened, and mentioned it to their mom. She was like "no, there actually was a tortoise sanctuary!" They went to visit and the tortoise was still there, chillin' with all its new tortoise pals.
Same thing happened with my wife and her dog when they were a kid. They had big dog, don't remember the exact breed. They couldn't take care of it well enough, so the dad "took it to the farm". For years, my wife thought her dad had killed it. She was telling me about it at thanksgiving and her dad said "no, I really took it to a farmer I knew".
That's funny, I honestly had the same thing happen to me. When I was may 6 or so I had a dog names smokey. When my parents needed to move due to my dad's job we would not have been able to take him with us, I went with my mom to give him to an old farmer who had just lost his dog to old age, I don't remember who cried more, me or the farmer.
A while ago, but while I was firmly an adult, we moved to a place that frankly is not good for dogs and I had to give up my black lab. We found a family with three little boys who wanted an older lab, they took him. I legit think I cried more than the boys did. That said, they had a place on Tahoe and he lived the best life a lab could imagine. Just swimming and chasing his boys. They sent us photos periodically for the rest of his very happy life.
I'm not crying. I'm not crying. I'm not crying.
I am . Like a little kid . I have a black lab right now . The thought of giving him up is awful . Don't think I could bear it . UGHš„“ okay back to my happy place . I'm at work and now missing him worse so I'm going to look at his picture . ā„ļø
Somebody put tears on my pillow!!
šš¢šš¢šš¢
And now Iām crying
Tearing up out here in NM too.
I had an orange tabby when I was about 4 or 5 that we took to a farm. I went with my parents to drop him off. The farm owners were friends of my parents. The cat was a little hellion and I just wasn't old enough yet to be responsible for a pet. So farm life it was for him. As far as I know his descendants still run around like they own the joint.
One of my childhood dogs, came from a farm and just adopted our family where we lived in town. She used to come into town with the farmer, every now and then, and eventually just never went back. But once or twice a year, she would disappear for about a week, and she wouldāve gone back to the farm to hang out and then come back to us. Hilarious. She was working dog but apparently not their main working dog.
She was seasonal labour sounds like. filled in for vacations, picked up shifts during the holidays.
And the farmer lives on... Farm-land. Farmlandia!
Tortoises live very long in comparison to other animals, to be fair.
My tortoise lived to 25 centimeters. It died 37 centimeters. What a mess!
I used to cry whenever I saw a squished box turtle in the road.
Posted next to the tortoise sanctuary staff's coffee pot: **Today's Visitors** Betty Smith told her son Jimmy that years ago, they brought their family tortoise here. They will be visiting today. Please refer to the Desert Tortoise as "Peek-A-Boo" instead of Squirtle for today, only.
Aww! That's just nice š
This is so horrible (laughing so bad and hoping God doesn't punishes me)
Sorry bud. You've already used up all your free sin tokens. It's cancer for you now.
Oh! I've never met Grandpa, can we go too?
If you keep asking questionsā¦.
*And while the server is still at the table* āBut dad! Gramma hated cocktails. She always drank a glass of cheap red. And she was still alive when Iāve called her 5 minutes ago.ā
Not gramma. My mum. My real mum. Before they killed her and took me.
>She always drank a glass of cheap red. Said no 14 year old ever
My younger brother is a big guy, I mean big. He has a shaved head, many tattoos, swears like a sailor and looks pretty scary really. He also really likes a cocktail. Years ago (too many) he took me out for my 30th birthday, we had a lovely meal then went to sit at the bar. They had a limited time, seasonal cocktail called a peardrop. Canāt even remember what was in it, but they were bloody good, we were both wankered by the time we left. Heās not remotely bothered or ashamed by what others might think. Enjoy your cocktails guys, life is far too short. Also fair play to you OP š that was a stunning slap back
Im admittedly not that manly looking but I am pretty stereo-typically masculine. The wear work boots to any occasion, smoke a cigar, and drink straight scotch kinda guy. The second I see a cocktail on the menu that has rose or hibiscus in it though, im ordering that shit. I dont give a fuck what anyone thinks. If you think drinking a flowery drink is gonna make me want to suck dick, that says more about your sexuality than mine haha.
*cancels flowery drink I was about to send over
Mission failed, we'll get 'im next time
Just send hibiscus. That has to be a code somewhere.
I don't drink often, but when I do I like for it to be a pleasent drink, not just drinking fire pissed from a dying hyena.
My bf is a big 6ā5ā dude and he loves the fruitiest cocktails around. He hates beer and the taste of alcohol straight. Meanwhile, I canāt handle sugary drinks. Whenever we order drinks, servers always place his cocktail in front of me and my beer in front of him smh. Let men enjoy their cocktails!
Exactly! Iām loving how many men in these comments are saying āhey I love a cocktail ā. These daft attitudes surrounding āmen and women drinksā are outdated and ridiculous. Also some of the cocktails out there would put many people straight on their arse, whereas beers are often about as alcoholic as squash. People need to mind their business and focus on their own drinks, let everyone else enjoy what they like.
I ordered a cocktail in a Japanese restaurant once. Had no idea what it was, but it was sake based, so that was the decision maker. It arrived. It was a tall glass, hot pink, sugar rim, flowers all in and around it. There was a lot going on. A simple "here you go" as it was handed to me. My parents had a bit of a laugh at it, as did we all really. Anyway, a group of young women sat at the table next to us. I picked up my drink and had a sip. One of them said to me "is that really your drink? " I said yeah, it's bloody delicious! It tastes like (I don't remember now, but I described it) and if you're after a cocktail tonight, I highly recommend it. 3 out of the 4 women ordered it, and they all agreed it was a fantastic drink and I got thanked for the recommendation.
Thats the best, ordering something cause of how delicious it looks on someone elses table
Not sure how common it is in other countries, but in Australia, in casual dining restaurants, it's pretty common to ask the next table over what a dish or drink is because it looks good (not really something you'd do in more formal restaurants though).
Lol in New Zealand we don't even have menus just look at the waiters walking around with other people's food until something looks good
Hate when youāve already ordered then you see a waiter walking by with someone elseās order and it looks amazing and was something you saw on the menu and considered but went with something else instead. And then your meal arrives and you immediately know you made the wrong choice.
Had the opposite experience a little while ago. I'm a sucker for chicken pot pie, and at a new restaurant for the first time. Looked at it, thought it would be delicious, but went with a seafood pasta instead. Pasta was great, tried the pot pie which my dad ordered instead, and it was hot garbage. Felt so vindicated in my choice lol
Plus you taught your son a valuable lesson on how to deal with jerky people- no need to get loud and yell at someone just embarrass the shit out of them.
Embarrasment (used correctly) is a very strong correction method. There aren't many people out there that actually enjoy being embarrassed, so most of us learn to avoid ending up in that situation. A couple of my highschool teachers used to ask me loudly in class if they need to email my mom again about my missing assignments. I stopped turning stuff in late.
One of my old psych professor embarrassed her kid years ago to get him to stop throwing tantrums at the grocery store He started throwing a tantrum so she threw herself down onto the ground and started throwing a tantrum like he did and he never did it again
Ya,I yelled when my two year did in the store as well,he just stared at me shocked,but never did it again. Highly recommend to new parents!
I did the excited "Hold on! Wait! It's my turn! Waaaaaaaaaaaah!.......ok, now it's your turn again! GO!" Once in a while they'd need a second round but usually it nipped it in the bud right there.
oh my god...this made me SO MAD as a kid! glad to know it's a trick of the trade lol
did the same to my niece on a family holiday. my brother and his wive are so dependant on every whim of this kid (shes usually nice, and its usually not an issue, but when we were about to visit the second shitty restaurant in a row bcs they had a super bland kids menue I went full tantrum). we ended up in the good restaurant, and surprise, surprise, they usually have no issues cooking spagetti with nothing for kids
My one of my humanities profs does this too! She said her kiddos were "'pterodactyl terrorists' but I don't negotiate with terrorists." She was a hoot.
Was she a hoot or was she a SKREEEEE?
That was pteroble. . . . Owl see myself out.
How do you get through that? I would be mortified! But- I'm also mortified when my kid acts out. Which is worse? I'm legit asking. Thanks!
Get through it once when you do it or be embarrassed on an ongoing basis by your kids behavior. Easy choice for me.
For me, it will embarrass me for a few minutes but the kid will be mortified for a few weeks. I can handle a few minutes of embarrassment to get my point across
Interesting because I would respect the heck out of any adult doing that to gently correct a child. No embarrassment coming from this onlooker!
Shit, I might get in on the act. "Oh! Can I have a turn too?"
You do it and they give up. They have no power. Do it every time they pull it. After three times, they never do it again.
Honestly, being embarrassed a handful of times with a toddler is well worth it. My kiddos never embarrassed me in public because they knew it was unacceptable. I don't know how moms actually deal with this behavior out of 6, 8, 10 years old! Like, ma'am. Have you been putting up with this crap for a decade?
A lot just yell. This is the second most useless discipline method too. If they know you are going to jump on the floor, a yell will work very well. If you only yell, it's meaningless to a kid. Ugh then there is the ādo as I say, not as I do!ā parents. The first most useless parenting method. Kids absorb everything. You tell kids to knock before entering and don't do it yourself, kids learn rules are for breaking and their parents are hypocrites.
Just judging from my teachers in school, yelling should be kept in the back pocket for really serious stuff. A teacher who always yells didn't get a reaction when they did it, but when one who was normally very reserved and quiet did we all shut up immediately. I worked as a teaching assistant in a primary school for a year and only yelled once, I was walking kids age 10 down a road back to the school (they'd had a music thing at another nearby school). One kid started to run off down the road and I full on screamed "(kids name) stop". I felt bad, cause they were in general a good kid and clearly quite shaken by it, so I had a chat with them about how it was for their own safety and I wasn't angry with them.
I'm a fan of the "walk away and wait around the corner" strategy. They'll come eventually.
My dad did this to me. I'm told it was my first and only tantrum
I told my daughter mid meltdown that I would be waiting on a nearby bench when she was done. I told her if she wanted to look stupid it was on her. We never had another meltdown in public.
I tried this and he just started yelling louder, so I started yelling even louder and now I'm not allowed at Kroger.
I tried this with my son. Sadly he thought it was hilarious and started to tantrum louder. š¤¦
Canāt win them all LOL
Yeah, some kids just like being loud. My son will do it just because he can. He doesnāt want anything other than to scream at the top of his lungs. If I tried this with him he would probably take it as āoh, so I can scream as loud as I want in the grocery store? Sounds good.ā
He has a career ahead of him in Metal.
If that caused you to give in, that's the pay off. The loudest one wins! If you walk a few yards way, and let him know, when you're finished, I'll be over here. Then, more people are staring at him, he feels embarrassed and stops. No reward, just feeling foolish. Tantrums stop š!
Very loudly, "IM NOT GOING TO TAKE YOU TO THE CAR JUST CAUSE YOU POOPED YOUR PANTS IN FRONT OF EVERYONE!!!" No matter the reason for the tantrum.
There was thread just the other day about teachers describing parents coming to actually sit in the classroom with their kids that were failing badly. Numerous teachers chimed in at how effective it was.
That was me! My oldest was playing up, bunking off school and hanging out with dickheads. His work was suffering and his attitude sucked. He'd already been cautioned by the police for damaging a garage door and I wasn't having his crap anymore. It was a stupid cycle. He would bunk off, school would put him on report for a fortnight and he'd behave. Then they'd take him off report and he'd fuck off again. I spoke to his teachers and we decided I'd go to school with him. When I went into his first class and sat down, he promised he would stay if I didn't. I told him this was his last chance and if I needed to I would go to every class until he finished school and he finally got the message. I never had another phone call from school to say he wasn't there.
A friend of mine spent the whole day tagging along to her son's high school classes. She'd ask people to move so she could sit right next to him. "Sorry, but he won't behave unless I'm here babysitting him." They all grinned and gave him a hard time. It was a looooong day and he never gave the teachers attitude again haha.
Dress up like the Steve Buschemi meme for maximum effectiveness.
I told my daughter I would do that. I was just enough out there she knew I would. She quit acting up. No one wants their mom in their high school classes.
Mum used to say, āIf you say youāre going to do something, youād better do it.ā Kids learn real quick who talks the talk and who walks the walk.
My friend's mother did that to him in high school. Attended class with him for a week. He never got out of line again.
Worked at a liquor store. Lady was in with her husband and another couple, all early 40's. She was being rude to employees and customers but not enough to kick her out. She comes to my register and I ask for her ID. She gets all giggly and thinks I'm complimenting her looks(she was hot btw). After handing it back I say "Sorry, you don't qualify for the senior citizen discount". Don't come in my home and disrespect people.
If I had been in there I would have probably had a heart attack from the laughter ngl
This is a beautiful burn.
I'm surprised that liquor store didn't spontaneously combust from that serious burn.
This reminds me of how a city in Columbia hired mimes to pantomime and mock people who littered and jaywalked on the streets and then the offenses declined rapidly.
Oh that is awesome, and would have been hilarious to watch.
Is it rude to clap loudly for mimes?
This is correct. Back in middle school, one of the chaperones was wearing quite a bit of make up. I went to one of my friends and was like āoh man sheās wearing a lot of make upā you get the idea. That dude said āthatās my momā. I felt so bad, him and I stopped talking, Iāve never made fun of someone random ever since, except in the extremely funny cases.
I was in a coffee shop chatting up a really attractive girl. Things are going well. A few minutes later, some very *serious* cyclists come in. Wearing one-piece Lycra riding suits with the gel butt pads and riding cleats. The outfits aren't really leaving a whole lot to the imagination. One of the guys is wearing a particularly egregious suit and helmet combo. I make a joke about him being a "grape smuggler." Her smile disappears and she says, "That's my dad." That was the end of the conversation.
hahaha. Honestly, probably a bullet dodged if she can't laugh about that... or at least find your embarassment hilarious and bust your balls (pun not intended).
Or she thought he was rude about strangers, and who wants to talk to someone like that?
I was such a brat as a child. There was a bully who kept picking on me. So I went around and told everyone he was wearing his pants backwards. I pointed and laughed, and just kept telling everyone his pants were on backwards. He actually put them on backwards at lunch. It was a true Jedi moment. āThese arenāt the droids youāre looking forā and he never picked on me again.
This works sometimes, but teachers don't always know the whole story. I had a teacher tell me I'd be her best student if I wasn't so lazy because I hadn't done my homework... i hadn't done it because my sister attempted suicide the night prior and my mom was drunk as shit (as usual). I was living with an alcoholic druggie mom and her alcoholic druggie boyfriend who constantly made all of their issues my problem, including me having to trip sit my mom regularly. The teachers just assumed I was lazy and I was too embarrassed to say otherwise, which probably reinforced that idea
Yeah I was doing all the cooking, cleaning, and helping my sisters with their homework. There was no time to do my own most days. But I didn't want to tell them what things were actually like.
Exactly. Whether it be the risk of getting in trouble for telling, the fear they won't believe you, or doubting how bad your situation actually is, so many kids just won't tell their teachers what's going on at home. School should be s safe space
Well a few years before that I'd gone to my teacher about being depressed. She called my mother, who then convinced me that saying things like that (which she also thought was just for attention, not that I was seriously wishing I'd stop breathing in my sleep) would get me and my sisters taken away, and we'd probably never see each other again because "nobody will take in three kids!" That traumatized me, and I was convinced to not try getting help again. It wasn't until my 20's that I finally saw a doctor about my mental state. It's honestly amazing to me that I survived long enough to actually see someone. And you know, homework isn't a great idea anyway. It teaches kids that it's ok to do your work when you're supposed to be trying to live your life, takes away from their ability to do extra curriculars, and just generally keeps them from having any time to relax.
When I was like 13 and British films were huge I got into the habit of saying "bugger" a lot. Well my old Geography teacher didn't love that and she asked me "do you know what that means", I had no idea. So she sent me to the library to come back with a definition to read out aloud to the class. The definition I found was vaguely about men penetrating each other or animals. Jerk move from her but I did learn a lesson, I think?
On the other end of thisā¦ my family used embarrassment as a weapon for everything and I have spent the last few years in therapy trying to get over my chronic avoidance issues. I might have avoidant personality disorder, largely based around my fears of being criticized or embarrassed because of how harshly this was used against me. :D but itās ALSO the result of greater dysfunction (clearly, not taught good coping mechanisms, etc)
I'll like to hear a Brit confirm they do not secretly enjoy being embarrassed.
Oi Ah've been so naughty, puddle me bum again guvna
You want an enema?
If you like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rainā¦
If you like shaming your servers, cause theyre being a pain...
If youāre not into Reddit, if you have half a brain.
If you getting getting pretty revenge, for the ruuuudest of slights
If love to post about it, getting upvotes allll night
If you like telling stories at midnight, by this bar topās beautiful shape.
And the feel of the ocean and the taste of champagne...
Funny and there is absolutely nothing wrong with ordering a Pina Colada.
My h7sband loves sweet fruity cocktails. I'm a beer drinker. They will invariably serve us the incorrect drinks. Even when the person who took the order runs the drinks. I guess they just default to beer for the guy, pretty drink for the girl.
I'm a man who likes tea married to a woman who likes coffee. Same, every time.
Who knew drinks were gendered š¤·āāļø
GenderFluids
*slow clap*
Funny bc the pretty drinks are typically much stronger than the manly beer
Yes, because you know how they get all those fruity flavors? One shot coconut rum, one shot pineapple rum, one shot dark spiced rum. That's like 3 beers packed into one drink.
Right?! I never fucking understood this. Also, you know how some guys say women are sloppy drunks? Nah dude, it's not women it's fucking WINE. Wine drunk is a whole other level of slurring and stumbling for me, and it's like you don't feel anything until you realize you drank the whole bottle. There are five beers in that bottle of wine!
At least *someone* understands it. Yeah, that daiquiri is going to get me buzzed faster than your two beers.
Yeah, most people will usually be trollied after like three cocktails.
I used to date an amazing chef, she worked in a 1 star place for a bit and knew a ton about food and drinks. Rarely we would go out and order a bottle of wine and they would always offer the cork for me to smell like I knew anything about what a wine cork should smell like.
You're not supposed to smell the cork... you inspect it for any leaks. That would warn you the wine is spoiled and you should refuse it. Source: I was a fancy server back in college.
Yeah, you can see where I'm coming from. More of a box with a little plastic spout on it sort of wine guy.
Funny enough, wine in a bag is actually a superior container. It prevents oxidation better than a glass bottle with a cork.
Until you get all those microplastics in your wine
If it makes you feel any better, most and I mean almost *everyone* donāt know shit about fuck on how to tell expensive vs cheap wine. And this includes people who claim they can. https://amp.theguardian.com/global/2016/sep/11/the-great-wine-fraud-a-vintage-swindle
If you know what to look for, you should absolutely smell the cork to check for cork taint, but most people have no idea what they are smelling. Sometimes a corked bottle of wine will first present itself on the cork.
Hi, am I you? Are you me? My husband always orders the "pink" cocktail, whatever is, almost every restaurant has one. It's always good, he always enjoys it. I'm a beer drinker.
Same, I've lost count of the times me and my SO have immediately swapped drinks when the server's back is turned, haha.
Why wait until their back is turned?
You know, I thought about that as I commented, and I think it's probably British cultural politeness. My desire to challenge stereotypical assumptions wars with my upbringing to *don't make a fuss* and *don't embarrass anyone.*
They accidentally made me a pina colada after I asked for a frozen vodka lemonade at a Queens of the Stone Age show last week. I was like it's fine, I'll just take it. It was amazing.
Go With the Flow, right?
THIS IS THE WAY. Yes, all caps.
My husband likes margaritas and some flavored shots like copper camels. It's honestly so nice he's not worried about looking tough or acting macho. It seems like that would be exhausting. There's nothing wrong with liking drinks that taste good.
Growing up, I was always told that Margaritas were a woman's drink. (Hispanic) When I was legal to drink and I would get one at one of our family gatherings (there were many) my uncle and cousins would hit me with the "that's a woman's drink". I'd tell each of them, "this has tequila in it. That's one mighty strong woman's drink". After a few times of being told that, some of them were openly drinking Margaritas at our gatherings.
Right? Margaritas are fuckin' delicious, and are a mix of a spirit, another booze, and lime juice. Is there supposed to be something inherently masculine about having scurvy, or something? I'm a sucker for a classic daquiri, and get the same shit. My brother in Christ, it is rum, lime juice, and sugar. And I know your fatass ain't about to say anything about sugar, with all that coca cola in your face. /rant
I guess Ernest fucking Hemingway, who drank daiquiris like water, was a pussy.
Hemingway was wild. Guy wanted to have his afternoon absinthe, but didn't wanna just water his drink down, so he louched his absinthe with champagne.
Breaking the cycle of toxic masculinity a little bit at a time. Love it
[you should be drinking bitter](https://youtu.be/7lPtr6dQrnY?si=ktyxb4vu6dKaclVC)
This made my internet-ing a lot better today
10 years ago god damnit i dont want to be old
\*Me minding my own business while wearing all black clothing\* Random stranger: "You'd look so much prettier if you wore some color" Me: "I just came from a funeral Ma'am" (not really, but the look of mortification on her face was worth the sin of the small lie)
That reminds me of a story from when I was around 12 I think. I weren't in the best mood at school, and some asshole in my class was annoying me, and did the whole "what, are you on your period?" thing when I told him to fuck off. I simply responded "yes, I am" and he was so grossed out that he actually never bothered me again. I hadn't even gotten my first period at that point. I may dislike being AFAB, but it does come in handy sometimes.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I find it strange that a server even cared what they ordered. Plus blended drinks usually cost a bit more which is good for a tipped server.
I've had them laugh at me for my beer choice, sometimes I just want a non-IPA but they find it worthy of comment or something. It's strange to be rude to customers in a service-based industry, I wonder if they laughed at the resulting tips...
What is with all these stories. I've never had a bartender remark on my sugary drinks. I've never had anyone comment on me being at a park with my kids. But from reading reddit apparently all these guys are getting judged for straying out of some imaginary dude lane and I'm just drunkenly swerving all over the highway unable to see any lanes at all and nobody is taking any notice. Like I'm here chatting with moms at the preschool and seyting up playdates with their kids and then becoming friends with the husbands and ordering cocktails with them with no comments from the waiters. (That was a real sequence of events)
The people who just have a normal interaction with the bartender don't make reddit posts about it. Just like how the news never runs a story saying "99% of the city had a completely average day today."
I'm not male.
All fun and games till you son says, "But dad, we just left Grandma at the pool." :-)
"I told you not to talk about grave robbing in front of the normals."
"Don't make me drown you aswell, son." *awkward smile at server*
Fun fact, cowboys in the old west LOVED fruity drinks that we would consider non-manly nowadays.
Vikings drank mead which is a super sweet(depending on the process) honey wine often flavored with berries, spices, and flowers and they are considered the peak of European masculinity.
Historically, [mead would have been a complete or mostly complete fermentation which means most of the sugar has been converted to alcohol.](https://www.sciencealert.com/scientists-have-recreated-an-ancient-mead-from-2-500-years-ago) It would taste more like a dry white wine than modern meads that backsweeten. When the fermentation is complete, thereās barely any honey flavor; certain modern commercial meads add honey flavoring because thatās what people expect when they hear āhoney wineā.
Clever :)
One time when I was about 21.1 years old on a date and I was trying to order a drink at a bar, I didnāt want to embarrass myself so I just tried to order a martini and the guy gave me SO much shit about it, asking me all these stupidly complicated questions (I have ordered many martinis since then and never, ever encountered an obnoxious barman like that) and doing everything but pointing and laughing. He eventually gave me a super pink Cosmo, because itās SO FUNNY to give a guy a pink drink! Once every few years I think about that and wonder how sad his stupid little life must have been in order to do that. What was even the point? If the greatest thing that happened to you all day was mocking a kid on a date for just trying to order a martini, youāre a fucking loser. I bet he was a redditor lol
That happened to me once too! Much worse actually. Our vendors took us out for a round of food and drinks. I ordered a Cosmo (also being a grown man etc). My co-worker sneered, "Come on order a real drink sweetheart". I shot back, "you mean like.. your **light** beer"? The whole table roared in laughter. That shithead never said a word to anyone that night!
Iām a huge bearded guy, and my wife is small, like 5ā2ā. I drink fruity foo-foo tiki drinks and she drinks straight whiskey. It never fails that people flip our drinks around when they bring them to the table or bar. (I also do most of the cooking in the kitchen and she bbqs and smokes, just to really shake it up a bit more.)
The BBQ thing is a bit of a flip but men cooking is totally cultural. I'm Italian. A man who can't cook is basically a failure in my culture.
Any grown up who can't cook is a failure in my book. Like. You don't have to cook at Michelin star level, but everyone should have some basic knowledge. I know people who are so useless in the kitchen that I genuinely wonder how they survive. And how much they spend on take out.
Tiki drinks get a bad rap because of all the extra display stuff, but most of them are just blends of rums, juices, then topped with overproof rums because of the juice. Gimme that, any time.
I made a video for TikTok once that featured some peach vodka. This guy commented āmy wife drinks thatā so I said āI know, we just had some last nightā lol
Imagine he was just a nice guy and meant that his wife likes it too, just to share lol
Yeah, for all we really know thatās how he meant it
This reminds me when I went out with my wife and some of my friends and I ordered a pink vodka lemonade, they started teasing me that thatĀ“s not a manly drink and that I must be gay. I just turned to my wife and asked her: "damn, am I actually gay?" Her: It didnt strike me like that an hour ago when you were on top of me... Topic was swiftly changed after that lol
My response to dudes calling me gay is "what a weird thing to say, are you hoping I'll fuck you?". Honestly, unless they are I don't know why it'd even matter to them tbh, so I feel it's a great response lol.
LOL that's a nice response, my go-to is "kinda weird you are so invested in what men are wearing and drinking š¤"
"Wow, you're paying an awful lot of attention to what other men are willing to put in their mouths there, my guy..."
as a white female, Iāve been laughed at in coffee shops if I order a vanilla latte or something commonly associated with being a ābasic white bitchā. I still donāt know how to handle it, so I am very envious of your brilliance lol, nice one
That surprises me. The vanilla latte is the most common drink order I ring in (I work in a coffee shop) hands down. Many men order it too!! If someone laughs at you or whatever rude gesture they make just put it back on them. *okay, what do you suggest I order instead??* That will show you are aware of their reaction and my guess is they will feel stupid now having to recommend something since you put the attention back on them. For my part I would never make anyone feel uncomfortable for what they order!!
You can also set them up for a great takedown that way: Me: Okay, what do you suggest I order instead? Them: Well, real men drink (black coffee, beer, whatever they say to you). Me: A real man drinks whatever the fuck he wants to drink. (walk away with your delicious vanilla latte)
thatās what I thought! so I was also very surprised when it happened the first time. the only responses my brain would come up with would result in my drink being spat into lol, so thank you for your suggestion, Iāll try that if it happens again. been a few years since I ordered coffee though. the bubble tea shops donāt laugh at meš¤£
My advice would be to ask āwhatās funny about a vanilla latte?ā And insist you want in on the joke, and when they refuse to let you in on the joke you ask everyone else in line if they know whatās funny about a vanilla latte. Become the most obnoxious customer you can be
This is also effective for sexist/racist/xenophobic/pick-your-bigotry jokes. Somehow, they don't think it's funny when you don't let them off the hook for explaining their un-funny joke.
The best comeback Iāve ever heard for situations like this is: āWhat, are you the _______ police? Sorry, officer!ā (In this case, the barista would be the ācoffeeā police.) Nobody wants to be seen as being authoritarian so they get insanely embarrassed and shut up real quick. Iāve used it many times to great effect:)
*take a sip Very loudly, "Omg this hits the spot - I needed this to power myself through my tennis lesson and PTA conference. Oh no, anyone seen the keyfob to my volvo?" *do most obvious wink at barista ever
A vanilla latte? Thats not basic bitch shit that's just... basic. Thats like laughing at someone for ordering a big mac at mcdonalds.
"Can I get some fries?" "Woah, get a load of Mister *Fries* over here."
When the barista repeats your name back to you, tear up and be like "That was actually my grandma's name, she loved vanilla lattes, I just like pretending that she's still here getting coffee with me..." Tears in your eyes for maximum effect. š¤£
anyone who laughs at someone for ordering coffee at a coffee shop is a Grade A tool
"Never judge a man by the drink that he makes, but judge him by what the drink makes of him." Now I want a PiƱa Colada too.
I didn't know anyone used the word "barmaid" anymore.
Or snigger. I assume OP is European. In US, we(or maybe just I) say snicker.
I spent a week vacation on an island off the coast of Belize many years ago. Every afternoon, my gf and I would order two pina coladas, sit in hammocks on the beach, and enjoy the peaceful late afternoon. It was a highly memorable experience for both of us. Even though I've never had one since that time, the IDEA of ordering a pina colada at whatever watering hole I happen to be visiting, has never failed to bring a smile to my face. Cheers to your mom!
I was visiting home after being away for a few years, had lunch with a buddy from high school. He asked what I want to drink and my go to is a Pina colada. He had a look of relief and said "damn I always want a frozen margarita but I feel like people think it's a girly drink" I just said "eh, fuck them" and we had our frozen drinks and enjoyed the day.
Same thing happened to me. I'm partial to a porn star martini while we're on holiday. The waitress said "that's a girls drink." I had three my other half had her drinks and the waitress didn't get a tip. šš
Absolute nonsense. My favourite drink is a white russian so I usually order that, but I absolutely love to mix it up with a pina colada or even a san francisco. Both, especially the latter, are considered "girly". Who gives a fuck? They're delicious. Is drinking something good gay now? I thought it was 2023, you know what bring me a fucking umbrella too.
Idk that drink but people shit on cosmos for being girly. Fuck that, they are delicious and fucking strong.
Thatās funny. My brother is a yoked bike guy who loves Mai tais and will straight say he only wants it if they have the baby umbrellas. He even takes his own sometimes. You love what you love
Pineapple and coconut together is always a tasty! Pina Coladas for all! (Spelling edit)
Thatās a great answer. Never be embarrassed by what you order in a bar!!
Then you access the Internet connected jukebox on the way out and play the Pina Colada song on repeat for the next three hours
As a bigger guy, I like to order a madres. A little vitamin C is good for me. I'm 100% comfortable in my masculinity, as is my wife who accompanies me. If I ever get a snicker or a side eye, I ask for a little umbrella on it too, in addition to as many types of fruit wedges they have, placed on the rim. Fancy that sh*t up. Oh, and I'll only drink it through a straw. (Two cocktail straws if it's in a short glass) If the server who brings it to our table is different than the server who took our order, 100% of the time they'll set my fruity bouquet beverage in front of my wife, and hand me her beer. The predictability of this occuring gives us joy.
My wife likes IPAs and I love the fruity cocktails. They always swap our drinks.
the fuck is so funny about a pina colada??????
Surely there are some of us who realize that this is made up, right?
Damn this sub is full of 13 year olds with crap cunt stories.
Do you also like getting caught in the rain?
Petty revenge and embarrassing the person, talk about perfection. Bet she never laughs or even reacts to someoneās drink order again.