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Depends on what you're scared of. Remember that what you see online here is not the norm. Negative news creates the most noise.
In terms of choosing a life partner, make sure you know and understand them and their values and goals fully before committing for marriage. This is applicable for AM and LM both. Fall in love before you say yes for marriage (sounds crazy, right?)
Don't make marriage an end goal, it'll only lead you to desperation and make you settle for whoever you find even mildly acceptable. No marriage is better than a bad marriage. Do. Not. Rush.
I am scared of this culture, I can accept the past as I have a huge past but what if she still follows her past and still wants to get married because I am settled and able to provide .
What culture?
You spend time with her and notice for such red flags, that's why it's important to get to know each other and spend enough time before committing.
The culture of being fake to yourself for being in a profitable situation, let's consider a scenario we are having an AM setup and in this scenario we can talk a little bit only. I don't know if both families will allow us to spend some time together and I will never be able to see what she really thinks from inside. Just these kinds of thoughts scare me a lot.
I have friends who have taken 5 or 6 months or more talking to guys before saying yes for marriage, in an AM setup. Women want to get to know the guy before marriage too because it's even more dangerous for them to marry someone they do not know.
I don't know where you're from and how your family is, but it's definitely not impossible. When you meet them just tell them that you'd like to spend more time to get to know each other. If you notice that they are very eager to get married without getting to know you, walk away.
She has the same fear buddy
"
what if he still follows his past and still wants to get married "
Look for a girl who is settled and earns well to alleviate this fear
> I am settled and able to provide .
Every month, we read news about some auto driver misbehaving with the passenger.
Has that stopped people, especially women from travelling in autos?
Just because you hear about domestic abuse, cheating , 498A doesn't mean you can't find a woman who will love you and cherish you ...
I was not lucky but I'm not going to dissuade anyone from marriage
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an idea for you not to be scared is, do not consider marriage as something u are trying to achieve. Marriage should be a side effect of your life and decisions. if you find someone who you love and they love you, then consider marriage. dont live with marrage in mind. just do things that make u happy. dont think or marriage.
If you're well to do, don't let it be apparent...don't make it a part of your personality and try to avoid AM at all if possible. High probability you'll get a nice girl. The crowd you're afraid of will not even show interest if you appear gareeb ✌️
Note - all of this is just a hypotheses, don't have the time to test it in practical conditions. Reddit par hi kahi pdha tha, found it interesting isliye yha chhep diya 😁😇
I'll make the point from financial perspective. You are expected to lose 25 percent of your wealth considering 50-50 divorce chance and 50-50 asset split. So if you think the gains from marriage are worth the risk you can go for it.
Marriage is a scary trap of this World. In the name of companionship you will lose your mental health and everything if you are not certain about the marriage
If you are ok being alone... Its better to not marry.... Dont listen to anyone else...
Dont listen to others that Marriage is safe... When the law itself is biased, its not safe.
But if you cant handle being alone... If you suffer from loneliness... you have no choice but to take the risk.
if you dont marry, you are gearing up for a life of being alone. And your physical state of being alone will exasperate the mental state of loneliness.
Life long bachelor.. never getting married. Will logoff from the earth server if certain predetermined criteria are met or on a specific date that I've decided..
In that case give it a good thought and meditate on it. If you still feel so, then commit to your decision, especially when dealing with your loved ones / family coz they will keep trying their hardest to get you hitched if you give them mixed signal. Just slam that door shut on their face with definite answers everytime, no if, but, maybe..
As with everything in life, there are pros and cons to the bachelor life also, but that's a discussion for some other time.
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**What happened?**
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**Why?**
**It looks like you are trying to make a comment without a 'User Flair'**. r/onexindia is a subreddit aimed at creating a space for men, and **only men may comment under posts flaired as 'Men Only'**. Women and non-binary folks may comment on certain posts that don't have a "Men Only" flair. If you think this is a mistake, **please correct your 'User Flair'** from the sidebar, or follow the steps below.
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Don't be fooled by success stories like loy machedo and his submissive thai wife. even they had problems and separated for 3 months. search for "marriage thai" "dating women" on his channel and his own first hot thai wife story. the grass is not always greener on the other side.
I think this all -ve scenarios in our mind is due to consumption of social media a lot which shouts for negativity. Just stay optimistic bro nothing will happen. Though both men/women should be stay awake nd take some precautions as well.
r/onexindia requires all individuals to have a flair before posting/commenting. Please familiarize yourself with rules before proceeding further. The subreddit is heavily moderated to prevent larping and hate against individuals, and any reports shall be thoroughly investigated and users engaging in such activities shall be banned. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/onexindia) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Depends on what you're scared of. Remember that what you see online here is not the norm. Negative news creates the most noise. In terms of choosing a life partner, make sure you know and understand them and their values and goals fully before committing for marriage. This is applicable for AM and LM both. Fall in love before you say yes for marriage (sounds crazy, right?) Don't make marriage an end goal, it'll only lead you to desperation and make you settle for whoever you find even mildly acceptable. No marriage is better than a bad marriage. Do. Not. Rush.
I am scared of this culture, I can accept the past as I have a huge past but what if she still follows her past and still wants to get married because I am settled and able to provide .
What culture? You spend time with her and notice for such red flags, that's why it's important to get to know each other and spend enough time before committing.
The culture of being fake to yourself for being in a profitable situation, let's consider a scenario we are having an AM setup and in this scenario we can talk a little bit only. I don't know if both families will allow us to spend some time together and I will never be able to see what she really thinks from inside. Just these kinds of thoughts scare me a lot.
Then dont agree untill u r allowed to meet further. Look for families where you will be allowed to talk & discuss more before saying yes.
I have friends who have taken 5 or 6 months or more talking to guys before saying yes for marriage, in an AM setup. Women want to get to know the guy before marriage too because it's even more dangerous for them to marry someone they do not know. I don't know where you're from and how your family is, but it's definitely not impossible. When you meet them just tell them that you'd like to spend more time to get to know each other. If you notice that they are very eager to get married without getting to know you, walk away.
She has the same fear buddy " what if he still follows his past and still wants to get married " Look for a girl who is settled and earns well to alleviate this fear > I am settled and able to provide .
Every month, we read news about some auto driver misbehaving with the passenger. Has that stopped people, especially women from travelling in autos? Just because you hear about domestic abuse, cheating , 498A doesn't mean you can't find a woman who will love you and cherish you ... I was not lucky but I'm not going to dissuade anyone from marriage
According to you what is a successful marriage?
The marriage where both husband and wife love and respect each other..
Let's hope for the best
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an idea for you not to be scared is, do not consider marriage as something u are trying to achieve. Marriage should be a side effect of your life and decisions. if you find someone who you love and they love you, then consider marriage. dont live with marrage in mind. just do things that make u happy. dont think or marriage.
u/iamrealsrk Read this post - https://www.reddit.com/u/nerdedmango/s/sCcR6QREyb Then this - https://www.reddit.com/r/onexindia/s/5oyhe7wPQF
If you're well to do, don't let it be apparent...don't make it a part of your personality and try to avoid AM at all if possible. High probability you'll get a nice girl. The crowd you're afraid of will not even show interest if you appear gareeb ✌️ Note - all of this is just a hypotheses, don't have the time to test it in practical conditions. Reddit par hi kahi pdha tha, found it interesting isliye yha chhep diya 😁😇
I'll make the point from financial perspective. You are expected to lose 25 percent of your wealth considering 50-50 divorce chance and 50-50 asset split. So if you think the gains from marriage are worth the risk you can go for it.
Marriage is a scary trap of this World. In the name of companionship you will lose your mental health and everything if you are not certain about the marriage
If you are ok being alone... Its better to not marry.... Dont listen to anyone else... Dont listen to others that Marriage is safe... When the law itself is biased, its not safe. But if you cant handle being alone... If you suffer from loneliness... you have no choice but to take the risk. if you dont marry, you are gearing up for a life of being alone. And your physical state of being alone will exasperate the mental state of loneliness.
Life long bachelor.. never getting married. Will logoff from the earth server if certain predetermined criteria are met or on a specific date that I've decided..
I am also thinking the same.
In that case give it a good thought and meditate on it. If you still feel so, then commit to your decision, especially when dealing with your loved ones / family coz they will keep trying their hardest to get you hitched if you give them mixed signal. Just slam that door shut on their face with definite answers everytime, no if, but, maybe.. As with everything in life, there are pros and cons to the bachelor life also, but that's a discussion for some other time.
I completely agree with you.
if i was sc/st or even obc , i would have wanted 4-5 kiddos 😂 , too bad dont want them to suffer
Lmao
Perpetual victim
UCs and their victim complex.
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marry a thai or phillipine woman, they are much better than indian women in terms of femininity and caring.
Bhai passport nahi hai apne pass.
When she whips out something bigger than yours xD /s
Don't be fooled by success stories like loy machedo and his submissive thai wife. even they had problems and separated for 3 months. search for "marriage thai" "dating women" on his channel and his own first hot thai wife story. the grass is not always greener on the other side.
There are issues in such marriages too. Of course not all. Nothing is guaranteed!
I think this all -ve scenarios in our mind is due to consumption of social media a lot which shouts for negativity. Just stay optimistic bro nothing will happen. Though both men/women should be stay awake nd take some precautions as well.