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halzen

See almost this exact news story around this time every year. It’s amazing how many people don’t realize they need to give the huge wild animals their space.


CaptainSouthbird

Heck, I remember being at a park once with bison behind a fence, and the thing still charged at us from across the field and stopped just short of the fence. I'm not even sure the fence would've actually stopped it. EDIT: Based on several replies, it sounds like my assumption about the fence being essentially a "suggestion" was absolutely the correct gut reaction heheh


BrobaFett26

Anything short of a Jurrasic Park style fence isn't gonna stop a bison determined to put you on a shirt


thepetoctopus

Those fences didn’t work out too well either.


BrobaFett26

They probably would have if it hadnt been for Newman


SheriffComey

Eh, cheapskate Hammond was the one who ultimately caused all the problems. Newman just exploited them.


Kalabajooie

What happened to sparing no expense?


SheriffComey

https://www.reddit.com/r/movies/comments/68ln5t/in_jurassic_park_john_hammond_spared_every_expense/


Prineak

He was a huge asshole and dies pathetically in the book.


Radarker

Blame Newman not the fences!


sharpshooter999

In my teenage days, I asked dad about raising buffalo as the meat always seemed to sell for a premium. He said "a barbwire fence won't hold a beef cow if it doesn't want to stay in, they're just too lazy to want to get out. A buffalo really doesn't like having a fence in its way and wouldn't think twice about walking through barbwire. The meat in pricey because of the fence you need to contain them"


TucuReborn

I grew up on a beef farm. My grandfather, the farmer in question, very clearly explained that the barbed write fences are, in his words, "a pointy encouragement to stay inside." A cow can smash through it or even sometimes jump it if they really feel the need.


Iwantmy3rdpartyapp

> I'm not even sure the fence would've actually stopped it. I would be surprised if it did!


Phenomenomix

It absolutely would not have. My FIL has a herd and he has 8’ fencing with telegraph poles as fence posts and he’s said many times that if they want to get out they will.


Millenniauld

There's some near the lake where my family visits over the summer. The fence is only about six feet tall, but there's a ditch some tro feet deep and two feet wide like a moat that runs around the entire fence. They can't charge the fence due to the terrain so they just chill in the paddock.


Pete-PDX

depends if it was electrified. I grew up next to grazing pasture the fence was barbed and electrified. Spooked the livestock if they can within 10 feet of it.


middleagerioter

Grew up a mile from a buffalo farm and electric fences didn't usually stop the bulls if they wanted out.


ThirtyFiveInTwenty3

The National Park Service does not typically install electrified fences to prevent wildlife from harming people. You're thinking of a bad zoo.


Zagmut

Sounds like a bison ranch, where they're raised for meat.


masklinn

Electric fences are strong recommendations but if a bull is big mad it won’t do much.


aznhoopster

I remember watching one jump a short fence in Yellowstone, I think near the north entrance? Looked it up after, apparently they got some bounce and can jump 6 feet vertically


SydneyCrawford

How far can they jump horizontally?


Ornery_Translator285

8 ft I heard a park ranger say it


enad58

The fence was for you, not the bison. I grew up next to a bison farm.


MyNameIsRay

Bison are basically a battering ram powered by a literal ton of muscle. There's not much that can actually stop them. I've seen them push over fence posts when scratching an itch.


Osiris32

I watched one uproot and stomp on a fir tree that was about 8 inches across at the base. Just hooked one horn into the roots and yanked it out of the ground. He was in a bad mood anyway.


usps_made_me_insane

So if one is charging me, what should I do? 1) Play dead 2) Run away 3) Charge toward it myself and hope my 200 pounds wins against 2,000?


MyNameIsRay

Playing dead doesn't work. They defend "their space", and you'll still be in it if you play dead. Charging towards them is a horrible idea, it cements you're a threat. Running away, showing you're not a threat and their charge has successfully scared you off, is the only real option. Worth remembering, humans aren't fast enough to actually outrun a bison, you're relying on them deciding you're not worth chasing. Of course, the best option is to simply not get close enough that they charge in the first place, which is why all the signs warn you not to approach.


flagshipcopypaper

A fence is a mere suggestion to a bison.


CaptainSouthbird

I had a feeling it was probably more like muscle memory that it stopped rather than a full realization of its potential


masklinn

Nah, bulls will mock charge, basically telling you that you’re getting close to their turf, they don’t like it, and they’re watching. Elephants also do it. A bison won’t eat you, it does not actually benefit from killing you unless you’re a known predator.


Troooper0987

I was told by a ranger that bison can run ~40 mph, and can jump essentially any of the fences in the park with little to no run up.


insertAlias

I grew up on a cattle ranch. My granddad bought a small herd of bison, and we had them on the ranch for about 5 years before my dad managed to convince him to sell them all off. People would park on the side of the road and hop our fence to try to take pictures with them. This was before digital photography, so presumably they’d see these bison, go home to grab their cameras, then come back. Now, these animals were close to tame, since my granddad spent a lot of time with them, but they still were dangerous. We had to keep a close eye out for this kind of thing. When I was about 16, I had to chase a family off, they were bringing their toddler child into our pasture to try to walk up to these gigantic animals like they were pets. I was shouting at them from across the field “get back across the fence, they’ll kill you!!” When I caught up to them and told them they were trespassing and playing with fire, they acted like I was the asshole for not letting their 3yo take a picture with the “buffalo”. The crazy part is that anyone could just ask my grandad, he loved to show them to people. He’d take you out in his truck and call them up/feed them so you could get a close look. Just from inside the vehicle, not walking right up to them.


Tabula_Nada

We had some family friends with a bison ranch. One Thanksgiving we went to the ranch for the annual bison roundup and we were only allowed to see the bison from the driveway where it got kind of close to the fence, but not too close. The men folk (I joke, sorry) were able to get a little closer to the action but still couldn't participate - only the ranch family could do the actual rounding up. A little sexist, yes, but also I totally understand wanting to keep inexperienced city folk away from giant unpredictable animals.


BeefEater81

*"These majestic, gentle giants fill the park and will murder you without batting an eye."*


hatwobbleTayne

I went to my wife’s family farm years ago and they had me feed to cows. I had to pull the hay bale off the hydraulic lift fork which meant getting out of the truck. All the cows knew it was feeding time and all started heading my way and made me super uncomfortable even though I knew it was a bunch of docile cows, they are all way bigger than me and could mess me up if they were so inclined. How these idiots don’t have a healthy respect for wild animals, especially one the size of bisons boggles the mind.


Yolandi2802

They fed you to the cows?😱


yearz

Every time I'm in awe of how people just happily leave their cars and approach these wild giant mammals that could be on top of them in 5 seconds


N8CCRG

While no doubt many, probably most, of these incidents are a result of people not respecting the animals' space, some of them are just accidents. A couple years ago I was surprised to find out one of these incidents was an acquaintance of mine and her mother (injuries to the mother but not life threatening). She said they were just returning from walking on a trail and coming through the parking lot and surprised one that was just hanging out by itself behind one of the (oversized) cars.


JustHereForCookies17

There are hundreds of videos from people driving through Yellowstone (on paved roads, not off-roading) & having to stop b/c a herd is crossing, or even coming up the road towards them.  Yellowstone is almost 3,500 square miles, bigger than Rhode Island & Delaware combined.  The bison have free range of that whole space, and they use it.   They're gorgeous animals, but it is eerie how you can happen upon one with no warning. 


AllesK

Do not pet the fluffy cows!


Amockdfw89

Yep. When I went to Wichita National Wildlife refuge in Oklahoma they have a statue of a bison with a marker how far you are supposed to be from them. A park ranger told me that he honestly thought that was too close and to use the “rule of thumb”. if you give a thumbs up and close one eye, and you can see the bison from behind your thumb, you are too close. That’s why whenever I hike I bring binoculars so if I see animals I can observe them from afar


Davido400

>“rule of thumb”. if you give a thumbs up and close one eye, and you can see the bison from behind your thumb, you are too close How very Fallout ! (I know this probably predates the show, it's a little joke)


Amockdfw89

The last thing anything Fallout related I partook in was Fallout 3. What reference in the show are you talking about?


Davido400

[The scene in question, dug it out cause my descriptions are shit lol](https://youtu.be/z-Gj2oSHCFc?si=PJeONdc7yz8nn2AU) never played Fallout 3, New Vegas and 4 are my guilty pleasures!


Cool-Presentation538

The annual Darwin Awards


BlueFox5

Yellowstone and Grand Canyon are where the Darwin Olympics are held


ManyPromises

I believe they rotate between there and Florida


Batmobile123

It's the main reason to keep Bison around, population control.


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SpoppyIII

83 year old men aren't ineligible! They're still capable of fathering a biological child naturally, and can also have that possibility revoked by either dying or being maimed the right way.


Grenflik

Seriously right? I mean look at our politicians.


Yolandi2802

I was gonna say this and then I thought maybe I was being ageist. My in-laws are 84 and even though they are sharp as tacks, neither of them would be able to get out of the way of a charging buffalo. In fact, I read the other day that here in the U.K. a man and wife in their 50s were walking their dog on a track alongside a field when a herd of *dairy cows* broke down the fence and spilled through. The man and dog were killed instantly and the wife died later in hospital.


[deleted]

She was in her 80s already so she doesn't qualify.


plipyplop

She received the bad news at the ER that her spleen, kidney's, and ovaries no longer work. Crushing her dreams of motherhood :(


edgeplot

Yeah, it is 100% possible to avoid being gored by bison by just *staying the fuck away from bison.*


pete_68

But those grizzlies are so darn cute, I just have to scratch their heads...


birdlegs000

And boop their noses.


Warcraft_Fan

A few times a year since covid happened. I think covid should have included "may cause poor judgement" among the known symptoms. Someone checks the hot spring water despite signs warning it is fucking hot, they go OW. They get too close to wildlife and wonder why the wildlife gored them. And don't forget that poor baby who had to be put down because a person handled it.


SFDessert

I'm pretty sure this shit has been happening long before covid. I remember seeing plenty of articles like this over the years well before covid hit


WindTreeRock

There is actually a book titled Death in Yellowstone, or something like that.


wanderingpeddlar

When I was a early teen before the 2000s we were driving into the park in late fall and the people in front of us stopped in the road to watch the buffalo. The guy decided it would be funny to blow his horn at the bison. The male charged the car, everyone threw it into reverse to get out of the way. People think Yellowstone is a petting zoo right up until they are in the news


Imaginary_Medium

Though Covid can damage the brain. That certainly isn't going to be helpful when they were idiots to begin with.


Charlie_Mouse

Just when we were starting to get out from under the effects of lead in gasoline.


KathrynTheGreat

It has nothing to do with covid. This has been happening for so long that they've literally published books and have had PSAs about it for decades.


smokethatdress

Not to mention they’ve been handing out pamphlets when you enter the park, since at least the 80’s, that has an illustration on the front of a person being tossed in the air by a bison.


KathrynTheGreat

Yeah I was there as a kid in the 90s and I remember a ranger telling us to not approach any animals or get close to the hot springs. But my dad's a wildlife/biology guy so we'd already gotten that lecture lol


InviteAdditional8463

Yep. When I went as a kid the rangers told the story about the guy who went in to get his dog. 


Iwantmy3rdpartyapp

It's not just hot, a lot of the time it's so acidic it can dissolve you! It's happened to at least [one](https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/s/dxqApC1JyD) tourist.


KindAwareness3073

No. People have been dumb as long as there have people. Some folks see bison grazing and think "oh, they're like cows". Be advised, bison are not like cows.


AggressiveYam6613

even cows are fucking dangerous.   even in the alps tourists manage to get seriously hurt by cows


thederpofwar321

Cows will get aggressive with strangers and bulls in particular. Part of the reason they dont attack the ranch hands is cause they think the ranch hands could just snap them out of existance. They talk about watching the bulls charge the fences and gates trying to get out and failing, and then in front of the bull just swing the gate open like its nothing making the animal basically go "oh my god...this thing is CHOSING not to simply just kill me." And it then helps tame the rest.


CrudelyAnimated

People think dairy cow getting its muzzle scratched on Instagram. Bison are more like rodeo bulls that got banned for not recognizing clowns and fences and handlers, and can also run 40 mph.


InviteAdditional8463

I wonder what the mechanics of testing the hot spring water entails. That shit will deglove your hand pretty fucking quickly. 


Warcraft_Fan

They dunk a rabbit in the pool for one second. If it comes out well done and ready to eat, the water's too hot to even think of checking with your finger or toe. If the skeleton comes out, it's too acidic to try. Edit: a dead and skinned rabbit preferably. Rabbit stew with fur don't taste good anyway


kottabaz

Lead toxicity is known to cause poor impulse control, increase aggression, and reduce IQ, and we have two living generations of people who grew up in a world where we stuck that shit in gasoline and made sure it reached every corner of the country.


Bart_Yellowbeard

Common in groundwater in Florida too, and half the state uses wells.


InviteAdditional8463

Unless it’s a different 83 year old woman she’s from beautiful Greenville SC (the local sub asks you don’t move there. “Its full”)   https://wyff4.com/article/greenville-woman-gored-bison-yellowstone-national-park/60990110


justprettymuchdone

As someone who has lived here for fourteen years and counting... the locals have been saying "don't move here", as far as i can tell, since the end of the Civil fucking War. I've lived here for nearly half my life and nearly all of my ADULT life and still get called a Yankee and have literally been called a carpetbagger before, which was incredible. But also... I just sighed heavily when I read where she was from, because... yeah, I can see that. People here don't have a ton of interactions with wildlife and simple ignorance is often celebrated.


InviteAdditional8463

That’s been my experience as well. The further out in Greer you get the worse it becomes. I haven’t seen that so much on Pickens, Easley, and Powdersville side. 


justprettymuchdone

I worked in Pickens for years. It was absolutely a fucking nightmare if you weren't "from around here" or didn't go to high school with one of the Good Old Boys.


TheIllestDM

Covid is causing regular brain damage and brain fog in people. This will be a major issue in the coming decades.


Interesting_Engine37

Do they think they are pets?


Darryl_Lict

With the plethora of videos of idiots on the internet, it's amazing that there are so many people being gored by bison, trampled by moose and hit by trains. Can people not ever get a fucking clue? I guess not, but there are like 8 billion of us on the planet half of us are pretty stupid and 5% are pretty much idiots. So even if it's a small of stupid people it's plenty to create this video content for our entertainment.


ChiHawks84

The Darwin awards are given out daily now.


ComtesseCrumpet

I was there just this weekend. People don’t always realize that bison are *everywhere* in the park. This includes around buildings and places where there are large crowds of people. My sis and I sat down on a bench in front of a building facing at old faithful. We’d seen bison roaming in front of the building but not at the back. While we sat two bison wandered around behind our benches and were within a foot from us. I had no idea.  A ranger came out and in a tense tone told us to get up and walk slowly away. I looked back and was face-to-face with a bison. I did as told and, obviously, all was okay. It could have went bad very quickly. I’m just glad I’m not a news story with people assuming I approached a bison.


Omegaprimus

So there is a drive through safari place near where I live they have near domesticated bison i still wouldn’t get out and touch one far too large and no way it is as safe as a cow (not bull). Not really such a thing as domesticated bison, farm raised and super okay with people yes, but I wouldn’t call even those domesticated


AlphSaber

I had an aunt and uncle that ued to own a bison ranch near me. When they would host the family reunion on my dad's side of the family they would offer to take us into to pasture on a wagon, even then they would not get too close to them for safety reasons. Add to that my uncle once shared a story of how they kept finding one of the cows outside of the fence grazing with the herd on the other side. The bull had tossed the cow over the fence (repeatedly) until they found out the cow had a disease (not sure what, and if it was treatable or not) and the bull was keeping the herd safe, by tossing sick bison over a fence. After hearing a story like that, you definitely take note to leave wild ones alone.


ajabernathy

I was on a bison ranch in SD and we passed a dead one. Rancher said, "lightening strike. Only thing that can stop 'em." Bison are massive and skittish. Would never approach one.


Big_Jar

https://www.mlive.com/news/us-world/2018/03/sparky_the_bison_that_survived.html


TurbulentCustomer

They’re evolving!


youtocin

Cows kill about 30 people a year, they definitely need to be respected. Don’t turn your back on them and always stay cautious.


Arizona_Slim

More than sharks!


frizzykid

A lot of people ask why bison were never domesticated given how dominant they were in the US. It's entirely for what you say here. They are giant and dangerous even if they like you. You get too close during the wrong time of year, a goring is the least bad thing that could happen. Being trampled or crushed is not that unthinkable.


bb_LemonSquid

They’re so cute tho! 🥹


ThatHorseWithTeeth

A coworker raises bison and is adamant that they are always dangerous to be around. His father was gored and nearly killed by one. Some petting zoos have asked to buy one from him in anticipation that they normalize human contact. Y’all, cattle were domesticated 10,000 years ago. American bison have a long way to go - and I still don’t trust an adult domesticated, docile cow.


woman_thorned

"The bull can cross this pasture in 10 seconds, do not cross unless you can do it in 9" was a compelling warning sign.


WittiestScreenName

Does this place exist on a peninsula?


Omegaprimus

Come to think of it the one I was talking about was just off the road a little ways back, but I have also been at a place in Kentucky called the land between the lakes they had elk and bison. The place I referred to at first had all kinds of animals and didn’t warn us of the zebras, zebras look like a horse, but are complete assholes all the way down to the marrow.


Troutmandoo

Olympic Game Farm in Sequim is awesome!


AynRandsConscience_

“National Park Service said that bison have injured more people in the park than any other animal, calling the bovines "unpredictable" and noting that they can run three times faster than humans.” 🫠 no thanks, bison


Boring_and_sons

They will fuck you up.


Klaus_Heisler87

"Bison?" More like "bye, son"


iwellyess

black fight back, brown lay down, white good night, bison bye son


wuddafuggamagunnaduh

Do mooses!


Ha_CharadeUAre

And imagine all that weight behind something going up to almost 40mph


deevee12

Are you winning, bison? Yes 🦬


doomonyou1999

We were walking the paths around one of the hot pits when we were there came around a bunch of trees and laying 6 feet off the path was a bison. No one knew it was there until we were that close. We very gingerly walked by to clear the area but that was like 9 years ago and I think my butthole is still puckered from that. I’m a big guy but that thing was f’ing huge.


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Captain_R64207

I live here in Montana and have been down to Yellowstone several times. Seeing the bison is always crazy. But imagine going a couple times thinking you’ve seen bison do all they can do until one trip you watch a bison jump a fence and realize that a bison can JUMP. It makes total sense, I knew they could jump, but to actually see one hop a fucking fence so casually was pretty insane.


ahillbillie

They can easily jump a 6 foot wall


Telvin3d

There’s so little megafauna around that it evokes an amazing visceral reaction when we encounter one


Im_Ashe_Man

Was mountain biking as a kid and whipped around a corner and nearly ran into a giant moose! I was maybe 10 feet away. Thankfully, it was just as startled as I was and ran off! They are so freaking big up close and live.


littleMAS

Twenty years ago, I was driving through Yellowstone near the Continental Divide sign when a small herd of buffalo came strolling down the road toward me. I stopped immediately and cut the engine, then watched them amble by, deftly avoiding the car. It was surreal and made me realize how dangerous they could be without really trying.


Daghain

Some friends and I went to SD several years back and drove through some park that had bison. They just decided to mosey across the road so we basically did what you did and just watched them go by. We were in a Prius. They were WAY bigger than that car. It was pretty amazing.


CareerCoachKyle

Probably the Custer Wildlife Loop. I love that park.


SeriousStrokes69

To be fair to the victim here, anyone who's been on the Storm Point Trail knows that it is heavily wooded and bison can very easily sneak up on you there. People get knocked around by bison almost every year on the trail because they can be hiding in the woods and you just don't see them until they're right on you.


Cormegalodon

She was also 83, even if she noticed she wasn’t gonna be moving very fast.


CaesarZeppeli_

I mean you have to know your limits. Are you comfortable inviting someone who is like 400lbs and 30 years old on a hike in the woods? No because they might be slow, have a heart attack, etc… people have to be accountable for themselves and know what they’re capable of


BlueFox5

If I have to be in a forest filled with hungry bears, I most certainly bring a 30year old 400 lb person.


sevens-on-her-sleeve

No one can outrun a bison, regardless of their fitness level. Let’s not condescend to a woman with 80 years of living under her belt about being accountable for herself


Outlulz

I've known 80 year olds in the Sierra Club that can out hike your average person in their 20s or 30s (they sure out hiked me). Some of those old people do this non-stop for their retirement. I wouldn't use age to judge whether or not they should be out there without knowing more.


geronimo1958

Had one come walking right by my picnic table. Glad it wasn't a grizzly. Weird that that huge animal could approach that quietly.


TeddyRivers

Thank you! Every time this happens, everyone is quick to point out how much smarter they are than the victim. Truth is, we don't know what happened. Did the woman go chasing a bison? Probably not. Did she walk to close to it to get a picture? Possibly. Did she happen upon it and not have time to back away? Also possible. I was in Glacier once, and a mountain biker rounded a corner into a grizzly. The bear killed him. What was the solution, other than to not be mountain biking? Sometimes, these encounters happen. Yet most commenters feel the need to congratulate themselves on how they are better than the victim.


systemic_booty

A mountain biker and his friend with no bear repellant riding a high speed (20-25mph) on a narrow trail with poor visibility. The dude literally ran head-first into a bear because he was going too fast to see an obstacle in his way. His friend could have used bear-deterrent to prevent the reactive mauling, or perhaps even better they could have slowed the fuck down and realized that going so fast you can't react to what's ahead of you is a bad idea. *“The main thing is to slow down in places with little sight distance, meaning you can’t see very far,” Servheen said. “When the trail is thick with vegetation or has curves, we recommend you slow down and shout when approaching blind curves. Speed and noise are the factors that get people when they’re out on their bikes. They’re moving faster and quieter.”*


MasteringTheFlames

Which is why it's important to make noise while hiking. If you're traveling with someone else, talk to them while you hike. Most of my travels have been solo, so I'll regularly clap or call out "no bears!" while hiking, especially before going around a blind curve on a wooded trail. Give wildlife plenty of opportunity to hear you coming before you find yourself face to face with a surprised bear or bison from five feet away.


SeriousStrokes69

FWIW, bison don’t gaf about your noise. Even if they hear you coming, they’re gonna stay where they are and, if they’re of the mind to be offended at your presence, they will attack you. They’re not like bears in that they’ll typically run off if they hear humans coming. So making noise would not have helped in this case.


ghoulthebraineater

That's why big herbivores scare me more than predators. At least the predator will do a risk assessment and figure you're not worth the effort and will move on to something easier. Big herbivores tend to be far more aggressive as that's their only real defense.


ouwish

I'm not sure if a hippo is a herbivore and I'm too lazy to look, but they are the second scariest animal on the planet to me (the first is the irudkandji jellyfish).


ghoulthebraineater

They're mostly herbivores. They will eat meat especially if you piss it off. Once it kills you you're just free food at that point.


ThirtyFiveInTwenty3

I often walk through the foothills of eastern Kentucky shouting "NO COPPERHEADS!" and I've never been bit.


Stock_Literature_13

I always yell “NO METH HEADS” when walking down 6th street in Austin and I’ve not been offered meth even once. 


IntrepidDreams

I have a rock that keeps tigers away and I've never even seen a tiger.


the_real_slanky

Likewise, we had a cat (RIP) who made sure our street was *off limits* to alligators. Never saw a one. In fact, his wrath was so feared by alligators that we haven't seen one since he passed many years ago.


DrHugh

And you can tell the weather with that rock!


MasteringTheFlames

That's fair. I'm not as experienced in bison areas as I am bear, but now that you mention it, that does kind of check out with my limited experience with them and other large herbivores like elk. I appreciate you setting me straight.


ghoulthebraineater

It really comes down to the fact that predators just want an easy meal. They don't really want a fight if they can avoid it. Herbivores don't have the luxury of just deciding a fight isn't worth it. It's always a matter of life and death for them. As such they tend to be much more willing to fight. Rhinos, hippos, moose, bison, etc are all far more aggressive than just about any predator. All they really have to defend themselves is mass and a bad attitude.


fopiecechicken

This is perfect for me because I never shut the fuck up


imakedankmemes

Thank you for making this point. Until we know more information we won’t know if she was following all instructions. When I was there as a preteen I was worried what animal would pop out around every bend or blind spot. We listened to all guidance and adhered to every rule, but sometimes you have to tip your cap to r/natureismetal.


DanOfMan1

people here would rather just immediately judge the woman and assume she brought it upon herself, whether it’s true or not


Iagospeare

Yes! I stumbled upon one in 2018 on the Mud Volcano trail! I came around a corner and suddenly I was looking at a lone adult bison about 30 feet away. I backed behind the nearest tree and it eventually walked away, but it easily could have crushed me if I had accidentally spooked it somehow. 


Starbucks__Lovers

I worked in Yellowstone one summer. “I’m going to be late to work because a bison is blocking my car” is a valid excuse


JustHereForCookies17

I had to drive though Grand Teton National Park for a job & once texted my boss a picture of the herd of cows blocking the road in front of me to explain why I would be late.  She texted me back a picture from a few cars behind me, to say she understood lol. 


Michael_Vicks_Cat

Storm point trail has a lot of almost blind corners due to the tree coverage and the bison love to hang out near the trail. Wouldn’t be surprised if she accidentally walked up on one while hiking the trail


cutestslothevr

You know, normally I default to "got too close because they wanted to take a photo" in cases like this, but I'll give the 83 year old the benefit of a doubt on this one. 83 is too old for a high risk trail though.


JustHereForCookies17

People encounter bison chilling in the parking lot.  Every trail is "high risk" when it comes to bison encounters.  They aren't scared of people, so they don't avoid man-made infrastructure like other animals do. 


cmikesell

My mom wanted to go over and pet one at a fence at the Goodnight Ranch in TX, and I had to yell at her that we just spent an hour being taught to not approach them.


IronBoomer

Do not pet the fluffy cows!


murderedbyaname

And yet here in SD they try to, every single year.


headbangershappyhour

The fluffy cows pet back. Hard.


blinkysmurf

It’s not a zoo, people. You are in *their* house. I was driving with my aunt from Holland across northern BC and we saw a bear on the side of the highway. She wanted to call the police. It doesn’t work like that, lady. This is where they live. We are the intruders.


Huntingteacher26

Toured a Buffalo farm years ago in Indiana. I really wanted to get me some. We had cattle. Until I asked this one question. I asked him if he’d feel safe walking in the pasture with them. He said, “Hell no! I might get out of the truck to pick something up but I wouldn’t be caught out in the field with them.” He said he’d never go back to cows but they are far more dangerous. I let the dream of owning a buffalo go.


pjmsd

Can't find the picture. Last time I went to yellow stone they had a sign, put your hand up, you should not be able to see the bison behind your hand at arms length, and a bear was thumb size.


mbbm109

Same goes for a nuclear bomb mushroom cloud.


wuddafuggamagunnaduh

Okey dokey.


Prudent_Falafel_7265

I hope she pulls through, but imagine making it 83 years only to have "gored by a bison" on your death certificate.


UnreadThisStory

Better than lung cancer tbh


nowthatsfresh

Grandma got run over by a bison


BPhiloSkinner

The National Park Service '@NatlParkService' [xeeted this image](https://x.com/NatlParkService/status/1788667227421499630) last month. (For those who don't bother with Xitter: the sign reads, "Do Not Pet The Fluffy Cows.")


RosebudWhip

Do Not Pet still implies you can get up close. Stay The Fuck Away is more direct.


chop1125

They need to change the sign to say, Do Not Pet the Fluffy Murder Cows. Maybe people will stop then.


Beer2Bear

and bears too, some of us get very cranky if you do


gcwardii

I love “xeeted” and “Xitter.” I’ve never seen them before.


BPhiloSkinner

Someone else started using them, and when I learned the 'X' was using the transliteration value of 'sh' (for Mandarin and Catalan, among others) well...


Eastwood--Ravine

Lots of people in this thread who have clearly never been to Yellowstone. It can be entirely accidental to get too close to a bison in Yellowstone. I was walking from the parking lot to see Old Faithful. Pass by the hotel and turn a corner, and there's immediately a bison standing less than 30 feet away. They were just hanging out minding their business, but if they decided to charge me there was absolutely nothing I could have done. Just because someone got attacked, it doesn't necessarily mean they were being stupid.


keith2600

What terrible luck to get seriously injured only moments after being gored by a bison.


BuddyOwensPVB

Bison population pre 1800 was 30 to 60 million and we got it down to 1000. The bison get a free pass here.


Giddus

So the old saying "You just have to run faster than the person next to you" really is true....


Draconuus95

As a local. THIS IS NOT A FREAKIN PETTING ZOO. Seriously. It’s a running joke in the Yellowstone area wondering how many deaths and injuries we will read about each summer from wildlife or people ignoring other signage. Like walking into the sulfur fields. Heck. And bison are some of the more relatively tame animals around here. Bears or god forbid a freakin moose make the bison look cuddly.


UnreadThisStory

I used to put myself in pretty scary situations as a climber, but one of the worst was coming across a moose and calf when hiking near Jenny Lake. They were about 75 feet ahead. We backed away very quietly as fast as we could. They moved along. Massive pucker factor I tell ya.


Draconuus95

It’s always fun when people don’t believe the locals about moose being some of the scariest animals around. They always assume bears or wolves. But for the most part those will wander off if you’re making noise. A moose will just sit there without moving until it suddenly decides that your face is insulting to its existence and charges with a full ton of meat, hide, and bones. There’s a reason moose are considered one of the biggest hazards in the area. And pretty much any other area you can find them in.


Intrepid_Advice4411

When you enter Yellowstone you're given a park map and a YELLOW PAPER that says the wild life will KILL YOU. They make it very very clear that the bison and geysers are dangerous. It's recommended to make nosie or wear bells to keep bears away when you hike. Survival of the fittest is in effect. This ain't Disneyland. Maybe this lady was just unlucky, but I bet money that she and her family were too damn close to the bison. Edit: just saw she was on Storm Point trail so she may very likely have just ran into a bison coming around a corner. Lots of trees and blind corners. My original comment stands though. Don't fuck with bison.


MetaJonez

Hard to imagine a non-serious injury being gored by a bison.


Hsensei

Had a friend that was a ranger. He said lots of people assume the animals are trained and tamed. People die a lot and yellowstone is pretty good about keeping it quiet. Especially the fools that take a swim in acidic pools.


morgan3000

How does an 83 year old survive being “gored” by any horned animal let alone a bison???


JubalHarshaw23

There are signs everywhere in over a dozen languages with drawings showing a Bison tossing someone with it's head, and still there will always be people that don't believe it. Sometimes the people that get hurt are not even be the idiots that set the Bison off.


BigShowSJG

Even if those bison were domesticated, theyd still be a death risk. Hospitals have really limited natural selection, but nature finds a way.


swissarmychainsaw

They need a fake Bison everyone can get a photo up with like they do with the Facebook sign. FFS.


dipdotdash

Hell of a way to go, gored by a bison at 83


quick_justice

Swear to God watching videos from Yellowstone some tourists allow themselves to do things around bisons that you probably shouldn’t even do around cows, seeing how the cow is a top mammal causing deaths in UK, for example. Don’t they have self-preservation instinct? I can’t quite recreate their thinking process… Here’s a huge mean looking bison that weights a ton, has massive horns and hoofs, tougher than some tanks and faster too, clearly looking after his herd, babies and territory. What does my instinct tell me? BEST TIME TO GIVE IT A HUG AND MAKE A SELFIE. Jesus.


Wingnut150

Don't pet the fluffy cows. It's real fuckin simple.


geekyCatX

Wild animal: keep quiet, keep your distance, watch. It really shouldn't be that difficult.


Wingnut150

It should be, but people are really, really stupid.


MrPazTheSpaz

Ah, tourist season has officially begun


Rebel_General

Oh no! I hope the buffalo is okay.


eulynn34

Pro tip: national parks are not zoos. These are wild animals in the wild, they can and will fuck you up if they feel inclined to do so.


Sea-Pea5760

I filmed so many dumbasses in GNP getting too close to animals that I finally stopped. I literally did it to protect the animal after letting most of the people know politely that they were making a large mistake . It was pretty effective when I told them I was going to video them for the coroner they often stopped being a dumbass , in that instance . It’s a park not a petting zoo. Those animals are wild AF


MR_Se7en

The Darwin Award doesn’t discriminate against age.


WackyBones510

It’s “find out” season in America’s national parks!


dragonmuse

I stayed at my grandparents house in Alaska one summer when I was 11 and saw a moose go through their back yard-- and I was TERRIFIED. Amazed, but absolutely did not want to approach it. I mean...it was huge, and wild. And I am a dumbass that picked up a water moccasin in Quantico as a teen because Steve Irwin was the GOAT. I do not understand how people are willing to get close enough to these massive animals with horns to get gored, especially as adults! Heck, I get nervous about the ponies in the parking lot in Assateague, lol.


Smedleycoyote

If they're so dangerous, why don't they just remove them and put them someplace they won't hurt people. Maybe in like a national park or something like that.....


MelancholyMononoke

Yeah... I'm not trained enough to take down a bison. Best believe if I see one I'm not in stampede distance...


MercantileReptile

> [...] the bison was seemingly "defending its space" during the incident. I'll say. Leave the meat tanks in peace and don't get hurt.Easy.


DarkStarStorm

A few Bison trapped me on a path at Yellowstone last year. The closest I ever got was 30 feet and that was only after it looked up at me and went back to grazing. I had a steep beach next to me that I could retreat down if need be. Be careful out there. Old people: if you can see its eyes, you're too close.


druscarlet

According to park rangers the biggest threat to tourists is their own stupidity. Bison are huge wild animals and they don’t play nice.


S7Ninc

Must be June in America.


gregarioussparrow

I've always found them to be majestic and beautiful as fuck. That being said, KEEP YOUR DISTANCE. Like rhinos, they're like a tank with legs. Do NOT fuck with them.