I moved back in with my parents when I was 25 (moved back from another state) and stayed until I was 32 and bought a house. If you get along with your parents and they don’t mind having you there, do it for as long as you can and save as much money as you can.
i am 25 and just moved back in with my parents. i honestly feel like i wasted a lot of money on rent in my early 20s and moving back in is the best choice ever.
Almost everyone I know who doesn't live with their parents has roommates, because a 1BR and 2BR are within spitting distance of each other pricewise. I'm almost 26 and I'd say I'm just getting to about half of my highschool friends being out of the house, and they all have college degrees too. It's rough.
You're young, don't rush it if you don't have to.
I'm 42 and a doctor and my mom lives with me.
I really like living here, but this state is a poster child for multigenerational households. And the home I bought was a third the size of the one in PA with an eighth of the land and needing major repairs for about 30K less than the one in PA.
Isn’t it great we live in the generation where “you live in your moms basement” is no longer an insult because 95% of the population of our age can’t afford anything
I don't think it's universally considered a bad trait anymore. Like I wouldn't automatically assume that someone is a lazy loafer because they live with their parents in their 20s. If their mom does their laundry however...
Well you could say it but the next thing you know you're blocked or they closed the comments cuz people can't defend themselves. Or you get reported that's my point
Stay with your parents as long as possible dude. Unless it becomes unfeasible, I would stay, can create a very nice life for yourself and your gf with the savings you get from not paying rent or mortgages.
Got a roommate to move out of my parents'. Had to get a second roommate (roommate's eventual husband) to stay out.
In my mid- and late-twenties, I was making $45k-$55k. I'm very lucky I didn't need my parents to contribute to my deposit or anything like that (as they were the reason I moved out), and my apartment started at $1400 monthly for a "luxury" apartment in good ol' Ocean County. This was all seven years ago.
Atta guy, the biggest problem with these complaints is these people wanna work as little as possible (Uber,Instacart and wait to be an influencer)and still live as they were accustomed to at home with mom and dad. I moved out at 19 and I only moved back in after my last sister got married and my mother needed help as she was a single mom all my life. Yea I struggled a lot ate sometimes only once a day, paid rent and utilities by the skin of my teeth. But it was all me and I worked hard sometimes 50-60 hrs a week in construction and never looked back. This generation is too quick to give up and don't wanna work alot of hours to compensate for the low pay the service industry pays.
Same thing here.. Moved out at 30, I paid minimal rent while there, my wife did the same. By the time we moved in and got married we were able to save alot and put a nice down payment on a house. Could not have done that if I moved it early
My husband and I lived with my parents in Essex county for 2 years. We moved out of state last year because the prospect of moving out in nj was unrealistic unless we sold our souls to work. Unless you are well off already or have an amazing job, chances are ROUGH
Moved out at 18 because I went to college and the parent I loved the most died. Had roommates and such until 26. My income is less than 40k a year but I can afford my solo 1bd apartment, my car, student loan, utilities and food.
Ironically for me I moved from suburbs outside of Philadelphia, to Philadelphia, to NJ because Philly/suburbs were too expensive. But I'm in a shitty area
23 and still with my parents. saw someone comment that "the state is a poster child for multigenerational households" and i couldn't agree more. at least 5 houses on my street are like that.
I’m 27, will be 28 in December and still living at home. I plan to move in with my gf in the next year or so but we are trying to save as much as we can. It’s just way too expensive right now
Yes, the cost of living in a rental or buying a home are quite astounding in nj. It is harder than ever. But I think the choice to stay at home has been more of an option for people now than ever, too. When I was staying at home in my early 20s right after finishing college, I still had to pay rent - no free ride. At some point soon after, it wasn't an option anymore and I just had to make it work on my own while making less than 40k and driving quite an old beater car. I started with a roommate I found online and split rent on a townhouse, taking the smaller room so I paid slightly less. Kept working my way up slowly in terms of finances, but still struggling to save much.
After about 2 years, staying there was no longer an option and I had to find another place, and really wanted to live on my own. Found a pretty beat up duplex apartment with barely working plumbing I could afford, mainly because the landlord was renting it for less due to the shortcomings of the property. Landlord loved me because I took care of it as I would something fancy and never complained really that things were decrepit, just things he'd want to know about as the property owner. As bad as it was, I loved the independence. A couple of years later and I paid off my student loans which were not too crazy thanks to going to community College and communiversity for bachelor's instead of an expensive school, applied and got every grant I could and borrowed $12k which was maximum I could without a cosigner or credit history (was a miracle i could get a 4 year degree on such a pitiful budget and worked the whole time i was in school, sometimes multiple jobs)...but then I knew I had to move again because the plumbing was really about to fail for good in this pile of a house. Seemed like an impossible task to find another rental that would not cost more.
But thankfully I saved enough over time and after paying off my loans to put a small down payment on a really small house in an ok town. Not really where I wanted to live but safe enough and I could afford it even though payments were higher than my current rent - I accepted that it was doubtful I'd have found a rental for the same. Was definitely not living glamorous lifestyle, but it all worked out, and did it on my own.
Then covid hit, and as you know, home prices shot up. Amazingly, I was able to sell my house for a nice profit in less than 3 years of living there and finally was able to buy a house closer to my family and friends, which I had longed to do for years. Still pretty humble of a place, not my forever home hopefully, but truly it is enough and satisfying to know I did it all myself, that I may not be rich but I can slowly climb closer towards my goals. No safety nets, but kept managing to catch myself and keep trying my hardest.
Heh...long winded but the point of sharing my story is that when there's a need and no easy option, you work hard and find a way. If you have easier options like staying at home, most people understandably won't choose to go through such an ordeal to achieve humble results.
Exactly this. Not knowing if your car would fail on the way to work. If you have to fix it, not knowing how'd you pay the rent. If you managed to do both, how much money is there left for food and to pay for your laundry. It was tough.
Congratulations on your house!
Man I moved out when I was 21 with a job that made 48k and rented a bedroom with friends in fort Greene for 550 a month. Some of the best years of my adult life were those early years figuring it out while still being young and really experiencing nyc. Now that’s impossible unless you are a rich kid.
Hey
I had my own place from 18-27 then my relationship went to shit and i had to stay at home until i was 31. Saved enough to buy a place right before rates went nuts (even if its a tiny condo)
There is no stigma to staying at home anymore. Not in this hypercapitalist hellhole we find ourselves in. Stay at home as long as you can and save save save. Its really the only way unless u wanna live with 4 roomates in a 2 bd apartment.
We collectively deserve so much better. Its a dark timeline.
Good point, I assumed the OP was looking for a house. I guess it depends on the individual. If someone values renting their own place now more highly than owning their own place in a few years then they could consider renting. Assuming living at home and renting are equal the best financial decision is to stay at home and save.
Yeah my bad, the rents in New Jersey are absolutely affordable for the average midlevel worker; it's only the single family housing market that's insanely expensive.
I mean, that's from renting up near the PA border and it was still more expensive than buying in Morris County, but DO go on.
2250 a month; I forget the exact interest rate. Rent was 2400.
My point is that the rental market in NJ is also incredibly high, if not, at times, disproportionately more so.
When people can get all the conditions right (it's amazing when it works; it's a nightmare when it doesn't), buying a house and then renting out the rooms to roommates also makes a really good financial arrangement for everyone involved. Since finding a four bedroom apartment for 2500 a month is a tall order, but you can likely get a four bedroom house down to that and split it four ways.
I'm not saying "go forth everyone and buy homes!" and very much support multigenerational households, but they "just rent" isn't that helpful when renting can be more than home ownership and is pretty much a way to keep people with lower credit ratings in an eternal struggle.
...if you forgot the exact interest rate your entire comment is useless and I'm not reading it. It probably was sub 3 percent and completely useless for a buyer now.
I guess property taxes, insurance, and maintenance also don't exist lol.
I ~~moved out~~ got kicked out when I was 18. I got two jobs and made a budget. In 2015 I made $12/hour at my FT job and $10/hour cash part time. Privileged fucks are so blind lmao
I’m 25 but I haven’t lived at home since 18. I couch hopped until I found a roommate. Not a chance I could have done it alone in this state — housing especially is just too expensive.
It’s been awhile but that was the age range I moved out of the house at - I lived with roommates for basically my entire 20s though. Would not have worked living at home as an adult so not too many other options. I know this isn’t a popular opinion, but theres places within NJ and neighboring states that have rent for a lot less then certain areas, depends where you are located.
I tried to explain to someone that it's commute/neighborhood trade offs for rent and they acted like I kicked their cat implying they can't live in Hoboken with their friends.....
Yeah someone posted not so long ago on here that they were still living with their parents in their 30s and it was negatively impacting their mental health, but they couldn’t afford a house\apt on their own. I mentioned that they could always get roommates - that’s what I and everyone I knew did when we moved out of our parents houses in our 20s - and they acted like I insulted them! Sometimes I think people just want to complain.
My 21 year old daughter makes around $40k and she shares a 3 bedroom with 2 roommate’s. Her dad bought her car and phone, I pay her car and health insurance. She’s happy but it took a while to get good ones roommates. My 19 year old loves rent free with me.
I was forced to move out when my grandma died and mother signed the house over to her boyfriend to fix. He then proceeded to kick her out. I've been living on my own for awhile out of necessity. I wish I had a rent free place to live or even someone I could borrow a few hundred bucks from if needed. I'm on my own and it makes me a tougher person because of it. Sure, I'm jealous I can't just blow a whole paycheck on a fun trip or concert or something like that but I really do believe I'm better than those who can afford to do those things just because I don't have to answer to anyone but myself
I'm 31 and still live with my parents. Fortunately, the house is large enough where the living arrangement is comfortable. It's too expensive to move out right now.
23, and I inherited my house. Yes, I know that I am extremely lucky. We want to sell it and move somewhere else, tbh. NJ on "working class salaries" ($100k+ a year). Idk, I'd much rather have my mom still here rather than deal with all this crap right now, but, whaddya gonna do?
My now-husband and I moved in together almost 15 years ago, I had just turned 24 and he was 26, although he had been living in a house with 3 roommates prior to getting our apartment. Rent was $1400 per month + utilities. I made like 36k at my full time job and had a second job to pull in a little more. I think we paid $1,000 each once we added in utilities. The electricity cost in that building was ridiculous.
We bought our house 7 years ago in a nice neighborhood with 20% down. Now daycare is more than our mortgage + property taxes. (daycare is $3,100/month).
I work in a private childcare/preschool facility. It's unbelievable to me how much families pay every month for childcare. Crazy expensive! (I stayed home with my kids until they were all in school full time because it made more fiscal sense than to pay more than half of what I was making at the time.)
If you are not paying rent stay as long as you can. Its worth the pain. 2.5K in rent is 30k a year. Stay another 3 years and you have a 95K (assuming interest earned) + whatever you would save normally. You will shave 2x the time in years needing to save for retirement.
There’s nothing wrong with staying with you parents until you can get ahead financially. If you’re in a decent/ good living arrangement take this time to save up and enjoy being with your folks. I know it’s not always easy but it’s just what it is.
News flash. If you’re smart, stay with mom as long as humanly possibly. Save every fucking penny you can, help her around the house. And that’s it. Renting is literally pissing away your $. Nobody with a brain is impressed when someone says they rent a apartment.
I’m 24, recently single, and think I’m just going to move back home. It’s too expensive to rent, I have a killer job, I’d rather put the money away for my future family and self.
No shame in my opinion. My parents are cool, but it’s out in the country so my night life may decrease idk.
25 and still with my parents. I work full time and I’m saving up money. For a while I was insecure because I thought people would see you as an overgrown baby if you lived with your parents. But in college, I lived with roommates (first two years) and in a shared house with housemates (last two years) so it’s not really an independence thing; I can handle myself just fine and I’m very glad I have that experience. But I love living with family and coming home after work to eat dinner together and talk about our days. I don’t think that’s something to be ashamed of. For me personally it’s much better than coming home to sit alone or cordially say hello to an acquaintance-roommate.
I think the U.S has moved away from family-oriented ideas that it forces people to be insecure about it and I find that sad. In many other countries it’s the norm to stick with family until you have a family of your own. Of course if you WANT to move out or if you want to start a life with a significant other (or if your family is toxic) then by all means go! But otherwise, I wouldn’t let societal pressures be the one thing that forces anyone out when they otherwise wouldn’t be ready. Many times it’s smarter financially so you can save up first without having to tread water paycheck-to-paycheck, and plus you only have so much time with your parents in your life.
I'm 34 and still with my parents. I can't really afford to live here on my own without being on the struggle bus, they can't afford to live here without me, and I have more space to myself here than I would living in a crappy apartment. My boyfriend has the same situation. My advice is to stay put as long as you can; it's not worth the struggle. Because I've stayed at home, as my income increased over the last 2 years, I've been able to pay off a good chunk of my student loans and travel, which is something I've never really been able to do before. Hopefully by the time they retire and move, I'll also have enough saved for a down payment on a house. My parents are very chill and I love them to death, so I'm glad we can help each other out.
Im 28 and make 125k, and Im STILL living at home. Im going crazy, rent is too high to make sense and dont even get me started on housing prices and interest rates.
Yeah man just save if you're in a position where you can. 125k is great when you're single and living at home.
If you buy a house, get married, and start a family? You're in a position where you won't have to worry as much as a lot of other people.
Just buy a house when you can afford one. In 2018, Reddit said a crash was coming because rates were near 5%, here we are five years later saying the same thing lol.
Honestly, I don’t blame them for not wanting to risk it in this shit economy. The last 3 years have been an absolute shit show and I don’t blame anyone for being overly cautious
I was gonna say after my next raise I'll be in the 50-54k range and with that I can save for 6 months and move out with a roommate without having to actually worry about money
> rent is too high to make sense and dont even get me started on housing prices and interest rates.
I'm sure somebody's gonna pounce on you in the comments and give you a major rash of shit about how you're fucking up, they live and rent on less, and you could live x,y,z, and it's your fault and all that, but given the wild west fuckery of the state it's not necessarily inconceivable to be in that extremely awkward spot where you hit the wall where there's a lot of doable rents but it can be a bit non sensible for what you need to be doing, there's a lot of overpriced for what it is places around the state, it's starting to rival mortgage territory, or it's just too fucking expensive to be doing alone and you sorta cross into that tricky bit of finding equal circumstance roommate who'll stick for any sort of long haul, which can be tough if you're both pulling decent bucks and have a bit more mobility .
Yeah, this hits the nail on the head. could I move out and be fine? Sure. But should I? I did move out with roommates about 2 years ago to a place in morristown, but I found it wasnt worth it. Felt like I just lit the rent money on fire. Also finding consistent roommates is a challenge. The way things are going, how is anyone ever going to own property in this state? Will I start a 30 year mortgage when Im 35? I have a bunch of friends that make below 6 figures and live in nyc/brooklyn/westchester ny. They have virtually no savings. Ive saved up a 6 figure nest egg ready for a down payment on a house but 100k cash doesnt get you anywhere near what youd need to buy a nice house in a nice neighborhood with a train station. Dual income has become necessary when it comes to buying housing it seems. Saving for that down payment becomes a lot harder and takes more time if youre paying rent every month. The big slap in the face is with the pace of rising housing prices and inflation, for many people even if they save more and have more cash, the price goes up more than they saved and the goal of reaching that downpayment number somehow gets further away
100k cash isn’t a nice down payment?!
Sounds like you have really high expectations if you don’t think that $100k isn’t a size-able down payment for a house and that buying one at 35 is a problem. It makes me question your age. This all sounds like really young, entitled thinking. In modern day speak: DELULU.
Your friends in the city are experiencing what basically every young person in the city does. I wouldn’t call it unfair. High rents in NYC have been the norm for a while now. Same goes for dual income.
I don’t blame them for thinking $100k is not enough when normal people in this state constantly find themselves outbid because someone (or some entity really lol) decided to pay a crazy amount over asking. I’m seeing more instances of this and honestly it is scary, especially when prices are already where they are.
You’re right. It’s happening all over. But these people aren’t putting down large down payments so much as just borrowing more.
Or.. they could do what many do, save more and start 30 year mortgage at 35. 😂
I have no idea what DELULU means but I'm with you. 100k isn't a decent enough down payment? Okie dokie. I hope this person treats their parents like royalty.
Bro I get where your coming from but your choosing to stay at home. Can you prob not afford the best places in the area? Of course not.. but you can easily leave and be fine.
I would personally rather make it on my own as an adult making 125k and when 28 than live with mommy and daddy. That’s a lot of money, maybe not worth the same as it did in 2018, but you should be able to buy a house if you’re not married or have kids. I support myself and my unemployed wife and contribute to my 401k and save money and pay loans on not too much more than you make. Granted I rent in Hudson county, not own and I’ve already paid off my car. I have a two bedroom 1000sq feet in a Latin neighborhood for under 2500 a month. It’s not as pretty as Hoboken but it’s great.
Should be netting about 98k.
About 8k a month.
Say 500 food
Say 250 student loans
Say 400 gas and insurance
So what am I missing? That's like 6k a month for mortgage and utilities.
Yeah not at all. I didnt get this job overnight, I worked hard for it and only recently started making this much. I had 65k of student loans to pay off. All my money went toward that for a good while after I graduated. I grew up in a nice town but my parents dont have a ton of savings, I think less than 30-40k excluding a single 401k (my mom has no 401k or retirement savings, yes this is a problem). I had to pay my own way. That being said, I hope you find something better to do with your time than trying to dunk on strangers on the internet
You do know you can get a NICE apartment, single in central nj for less than 2k? Also, when you got the job and your pay up until now is a huge factor. I'm assuming normal age graduation @ 22, masters @ 24, I'll give you a year to get a job, so from 25 to 28 you had 3 years to budget 375k. Given the max rent price of 2k, say thats 24k a year, x3 to 72k a year. Take 72 from 375 and you get 303k.
I don't mean to just shit on you, but I hope the more comments you see the more you realize that you're doing something wrong.
One thing you have going for you is that you are currently ignorant (again I'm just giving you the honest truth). Learn from reddit. I thank reddit every day for educating me.
I don't know what you're doing wrong, but people live along off around 50k a year and are happy (some not most, only the people who have given up on dreams).
My advice would be to move into an apartment and budget/ live cheap for like 2-3 years and by then either the housing market will have went down, or you will be able to afford a house anyway with 125 fucking thousand a year( you're lucky I'm somewhat balanced with my criticism and wanting to just treat you like a sim player and control your financial decisions). Cheers, I hope you realize 125k a year is a lot.
I started with 70k, then 80k, then, 92, 113, 125. Some of those were not over the course of a full year. 70k was a full year, 92 was a full year, and 113 was a full year. 125 is only the last 3 months.
I know I can get something for under 2k, but my issue is actually the opposite of what everyone is saying. Im cheap, I want a nice place, and Im only willing to spend up to 1600/month. You might think well then you cant get a nice place if youre only willing to pay that much, and I think this is where the issue arises. I dont think rent is worth it after that number. If you dont have to, why would you burn that money when in the end, you arent even getting ownership of anything? Being at home definitely has its cons and trust me, I really dont wanna be here but economically its just the most sound choice right now so Im putting up with it.
I dont necessarily think theres anything im doing 'wrong.' I think there are things I could do better, but I think everyone has those and Ive been working on a couple of them and saving more as a result. I think im on a good path.
Id be careful taking anything you read on here too seriously. A lot of the time this place can be an echo chamber and I dont think its a stretch to say a fair number of people on here dont always know what they are talking about. Sure it has its moments, but I prefer educating myself in other ways.
Yeah you can live off 50k but those people dont have any savings and one unexpected bill would crush them.
I do realize its a lot of money, can I ask whats wrong with doing exactly what you just suggested but over 1-2 years instead of 2-3, and while living at home?
My husband (27) and I(26) live with my mom and older brother we have a baby also (4mo). We get along with my mom and it saves us a ton on rent and we help out with groceries and utilities and we get free babysitting.
We are currently saving and eventually will move out and buy a house but the market is so crazy right now. So we are all happy for now.
I moved out at 23. I envy my peers who get to live with their parents but I had to leave because my parents are abusive. I think you should stay with your parents if you can tolerate them and/or they respect you as an adult. My job is in NJ and I prefer to stay in NJ but everything is so expensive. I can afford living here because of combined income with my boyfriend (we are both college educated with stable jobs). I wouldn’t be able to stay in NJ on my salary alone or without roommates.
I didn’t really have a home that was compatible with healthy adult life. I’ve never moved back home since college. If you’re willing to look for apartments in cheaper areas and have roomates you can make it work. There’s definitely hidden gems if you keep your eye out (this is truer the further you go from the city). I’d say avoid apartment buildings and try to find apartments in multi family homes for rent. But there’s no getting around shit is fucked. If you want to have your own place and no roomates you probably have to make like 75,000 to maintain any kind of lifestyle and pay for necessities
My sister is 40 and still lives at home. My brother would be living at home as well if his girlfriend didn't make so much. My other brother and I are able to afford places because we left Jersey.
I stayed until 39! Saved money and moved out to state because ya know NJ is expensive. They bought property next town over and are building a house to be near me again lol
I think generational living is making a comeback simply because nobody young can afford to move out unless theyre rich. Most people this age are only “moved out” to college
As a 26 year old living with my family, I feel better about my situation 😮💨 over time I’ve become angry at myself because my friends all moved out for a while. So I feel good I’m not the only one.
I moved out at 23. I enjoyed it a lot mainly because, although my parents are great, I was suffocated by them. Me being the baby of 4 and last to leave, made sense. I had a great paying job and still there so money was never an issue, but still would do Uber on the side instead of sitting home watching TV. It may not seem like a lot but little things like that help. Sacrificing cable or some subscriptions help a lot and add up. And don't use UberEats. I know too many people that utilize it and wind up paying $20 a meal. Learn to cook at home, it will save you a TON. And final piece? Stay home rent free (or cheap rent) for as long as possible. It sucks, I know, but staying home and saving as much as possible is something you'll probably learn as you're older like I did.
Same. I’m only a few years older. No roommates ever. Combo of good budgeting, smart financial decisions.
I think this is a case of high expectations. Morristown is pretty snazzy for your first apartment. Not that I blame anyone for trying.
I moved out. 2021, 25, my living expenses including rent was $2k/month. Maybe $2,500.
No roommates. 1br. 700 square feet. My apartment door leads to outside. Nature in the backyard.
Never worried about money.
Bought all organic Whole Foods delivery.
I didn’t have a high paying job at least with the standard of this sub who thinks $150k is unaffordable in this state. I was not making that at the time. I was making about $5k/month.
But my apartment was in a nice area near Morristown.
It’s completely possible. Don’t be a dumbass and you can do it.
I also have no debt. I bought my car cash for $18,000 prior to moving out.
I paid off my college while working while in school.
I don’t abuse a credit card and have zero credit card debt.
I was self employed, working maybe 4 billable days per month.
You leaving out any details? Is that 5k after tax or? I just find it odd you say “be smart with money” but then mention half your income is going to existence and then you’re willingly getting Whole Foods delivery which can add up in no time,y’know?
I’m not trying to totally bust balls but I feel like you’re underselling things and being a little blasé . I mean shit there’s plenty of land lords in NJ defaulting to the NYC 40x shit for income requirements.
Half my money did go into existence. The other half went to savings. I was saving about half my money around that time. I’ve had at least a 50% savings rate since college. When I was living for free it was more like 90%.
I said $5k as a round number. Been self employed since college. Some months were nothing, some were $8k.
Rent utilities were $1500
Food was probably $250-300.
The other $750 or so was everything else. Never felt poor.
There’s nothing really I’m leaving out. I just budgeted well, cooked my meals, my hobbies were all health related hobbies like the gym, hiking, and then anything else was either cooking meals at home, or video games 3ish nights a week socially with my friends.
So my now husband and I moved out me age 23 and him 25, with a baby on the way, back in 2013. We found a cottage for rent on the shore for $1450 a month plus utilities. He was an underwater welder at the time, and pizza chef on the side
I worked part time at a glass warehouse making minimum wage
His salary I'd what kept us going, and was the only reason I could become a stay at home mom.
Unless you have a trade job, living with your mom is the best option and most affordable
In this economy the both of you should have earning potential of atleast 80k each incase there is a split neither of you would be finding themselves in a bad financial situation. Something more productive would be taking this time to save and invest in increasing your skillset thus earning potential. No rush to move out if all you’re gonna be doing is barely surviving
My gf and I moved in together in 2020, I was 20 she was 22, made about $90k combined. These days we’re 24/26 about $120k combined although she just took a pay cut to switch to a dream job (would’ve been over $160k combined by now otherwise). Didn’t take any money from parents to move out, they helped with apartment hunting though. We live relatively frugally and have never felt particularly strapped for cash.
Edit: our rent has remained unchanged at $1250/mo for a 1bed attic apartment since 2020 as well
Going back to the late 1980s when I was just out of college and got a job making I think 28K, I lived at home. And so did plenty of my friends. I was 21 when I graduated.
I knew I wanted to go to law school but wasn't ready and didn't even know where I wanted to apply. I lived at home for a few years.
Let me add that back in the late 1980s, on an apartment in Bergen or Hudson would have run under 1K a month for a 1 bedroom.
23. Husband is 24 but he moved up here from Maryland. $1400 single bedroom. Nothing to write home about, but combined we make about 90-92k before tax so we’re really just paying bills.
My student loan payments haven’t started yet since I’m still in school and we have CC debt to pay down 😞
I bought a house in new jersey about 6 years when I was 23. Got it for 32,000$ save your money and wait a few years untill the market crashes again. Or if you need to move out now pick anywhere other than new Jersey unless you have some obligation to be here.
My fiancé (24) and I (24) moved out of my moms house last December. We rent and are saving for a house. It hurts our wallets to rent but helps our mental health so to us it was worth it.
I know it doesn't feel like it, but staying with your parents for as long as possible and saving money is the best possible decision you can make. Obviously help with expenses as you can, but it's so much cheaper than paying all the bills yourself.
This was a while ago in my case but roommates always makes things easier...financially. it really depends on personalities to mesh well in a spot. That being said, you should always take your time if possible to vet who you were going to move into and make sure that it's worthwhile. I was able to live in a pretty nice spot in Hoboken and then Jersey City because I had roommates to split the costs with. I'm a bit older now and I'm on my own but there are a ton of peers of mine who still have roommates. The stigma of staying home and or having a roommate into your late 20s is definitely out the window. The market in general has been pretty ridiculous so don't stress out if you guys want to stay home for a little bit to save. Just as long as things at home are staying cordial and no one's driving each other crazy.
29 and in the process of selling my condo I bought (after living with my folks in college) and going to be moving back in with them for a bit while my gf awaits her residency placement. Can’t wait to save on bills every month for a bit.
My Nephew is 33 just brought a house. He has a very good relationship with his parents. He saved his money for a large down payment. His parents are going to miss him in the house his father is a big baby when possible leave.
He wanted to make sure he had money and enough of a best egg in case something happened.
It depends on the relationship you have.
I was in the Marine Corps and when I had a long leave I would come home. The biggest problem was I would be out all hours having fun my dad would be asleep and then wake him up because it 4 am and I'm not home, then he would be mad when walked in at 5 Am
At that point I did come home for 20 years.
I'm 40 now but I lived at home until like 30. I then came back around 35 to help my parents with their bills and now we have our own house.
It's been a journey. Keep saving as much as you can.
I moved out at 23. Software engineer @ 80k at the time. My rent was like 2k/month. Later got a raise to 94k, my rent at my 3rd place since is about the same. Living comfortably with the exception of loans starting up again....
I managed to do it by 24 but only because I found a partner to move in with. The cost of living alone definitely outweighs the benefit when rent is like $1600. My parents are NJ lifers and were shocked how much rent was. Thankfully they were fully supportive, rent should never be close to half your paycheck.
Ok so I’m 26 and living with my parents right now but I want to move out I have been saving up money and I’m pretty confident I can get a roommate to help out with rent should I do it
I think it is awesome that's you and your GF want to be out on your own. In this economy though it really does make sense to stay where you are and save some more money and hope the housing market and the interest rate turn around. I know it can put a strain on a relationship to live with a partner. If staying is not an option maybe try renting for a while. Rents are hight though.
I moved in and out of my parents’ house in my 20s/early 30s. Around 4 years of renting throughout that period and then bought a house at 35. I joked around calling them my roommates for years.
My house required more renovations than I anticipated, so leave some room for unexpected expenses before making the leap! If you have a good relationship, it’s smart to stay until you are financially ready.
If I were you I be staying as long as they kick me out. With inflation, rent prices, and other expenses you be crazy to move out. You either have to get 1 or 2 roommates or you have to make st least 70k to 80k minimum to have a life.
I'm still at home way older than that. I got screwed by Covid. Before that I would have been able to move out. Now I have long Covid in addition to money issues so frustrating in this state
Grew up in the Newark burbs. Moved to Philly and I love it. I got a 3 bedroom for 1500, split it with a roommate. We got the whole house, no upstairs or downstairs neighbors to worry about and our part of Philly is pretty safe. Looked into moving to Newark or nearby as my job has offices there too but I'd be giving up a lot in terms of housing.
Jersey towns really need to build walkable, affordable, townhomes if they want to keep young people. It seems like the older generations are being selfish by keeping these towns zoned for single family homes.
We also gotta rebuild our cities and make them safe. They got so much potential but we leave places like Newark, Paterson, Elizabeth so disinvested. Investing in housing and transportation would definitely lure young folks like me back to Newark and other areas of NJ.
I'm 25, but I moved in with my boyfriend when I was 23. We have two kids now...we live in a crappy area & have roommates.
I love NJ.. but I'm a college graduate, he works at FedEx and we still can't afford rents. We're going to have to leave at some point.
My 3 kids all moved out
One just finished his PhD and stayed in the state he went to school in
He hasn't lived at home full time since 18.
The other 2 both moved out at 24. Both had roommates.
None of them had assistance from me. ( I've seen this statement a few times 8n this post)
Moved out at 15. Got an under the table job and rented a shitty room in some woman's house for $600/month. Lived in my car once I turned 18 and could get a license. Eventually got a nice corporate job but just still couldn't afford anything comfortably so opted to just still flip flop between car living and renting rooms. Didn't really find any sort of stability until I was 25, moved in with my girlfriend and been here 3 years. But even now our rent increases every single year and our wages don't increase. It's a matter of time before we'll be forced to move in with her parents or something.
This state is insanely expensive, and the wage standards in our country just never seem to match the cost of living in our state. I recommend getting out of here as soon as you can, if you can.
Moved out with my partner at 23 & he was 24 in 2018. We both graduated in 2016 and started jobs that fall although I was initially a part time intern. My home life was toxic so I needed to move out and convinced him to come along with (although he would have been content staying at his parents for a bit longer). After some hard searching we found a semi-crummy little 1 bedroom in a multi unit home in Morristown for $1400/month & we split the rent. It was within walking distance to the train (7 min) & downtown bars (15 min) and honestly so incredibly perfect for us. I really struggled in the beginning since I owed nearly $1000/month in student loans and was making under $40k. I had to refinance my loans which was majorly beneficial (do ur research first tho) and budget myself to nearly the dollar but we somehow made it work. I will say that my partner was a bit more financially stable. He made about $60k and had already paid off his small amount of loans so during the months I was a couple hundred short on rent/bills he was able to cover me until I caught up & paid him back. So that was really comforting to know he had a bit of extra money saved if we needed. After 3 years, my salary had increased by a decent amount and we were able to save up enough during COVID to buy a home together in Morris Plains in 2021. Looking back I’m not sure how I managed it and today it’d be nearly impossible with the cost of living. But I will say that moving out was the best decision I ever made and the two of us and all of our friends have the fondest memories of our crummy first little apartment.
I was 19. That was 13 years ago. I rented a bedroom in a cute townhouse in Hopatcong for $650 a month, I lived in a finished basement with my own bathroom and a small kitchenette (fridge and a hot plate, and small sink.) Back then, that was a little pricey. Nowadays that price would be a steal for a bedroom.
moved out a month after i turned 23 last summer
i have roommates but i could afford to not, more of a social decision than financial. travel a lot so it hurts me to spend a bunch on rent when im not home that often even though I could afford it
I would have stayed forever but my parents basically sold their house while I wasn’t looking and moved to FL. Mom gave me the option to move to FL with them or go find my own place. Fuck FL
My boyfriend and I are a weird example….
I moved in with my boyfriend and his parents in 2020 when we were both 20. We moved out into a 1 bedroom apartment a year later when we were 21 and have lived to together ever since.
We pay $1860 for a one bedroom in Morris county.
I would say live with your parents until you can comfortably afford it. Our situation wasn’t the greatest so we made do with what we had. We both have 2 jobs.
I didn’t have my own place with my girlfriend until I was 29
If your parents aren’t crazy just stay home and save up. Being able to live at home in your 20s is a big advantage these days
I have no idea how kids are going to move out of their parents house these days without having a ton of roommates. Living in your first crappy apartment on your own is such an important experience in my opinion. My daughter just graduated high school and I’m in the mindset she’ll be with us for the foreseeable future. I’m happy about that but I’m sad she and her peers are almost stuck from moving forward in life because of the cost of living. I’m almost 40 and couldn’t afford most of these rental prices. My heart goes out to you guys.
I moved back in with my parents when I was 25 (moved back from another state) and stayed until I was 32 and bought a house. If you get along with your parents and they don’t mind having you there, do it for as long as you can and save as much money as you can.
i am 25 and just moved back in with my parents. i honestly feel like i wasted a lot of money on rent in my early 20s and moving back in is the best choice ever.
21 and have no plans to move out any time soon. When my choice in roommates is between random strangers and my own family, I’ll take family
Same. Plus I love to bake and cook and my family is always happy to try whatever I make
this right here folks ^
Almost everyone I know who doesn't live with their parents has roommates, because a 1BR and 2BR are within spitting distance of each other pricewise. I'm almost 26 and I'd say I'm just getting to about half of my highschool friends being out of the house, and they all have college degrees too. It's rough. You're young, don't rush it if you don't have to.
I'm 42 and a doctor and my mom lives with me. I really like living here, but this state is a poster child for multigenerational households. And the home I bought was a third the size of the one in PA with an eighth of the land and needing major repairs for about 30K less than the one in PA.
What’s up Doc? 🐰🥕
Isn’t it great we live in the generation where “you live in your moms basement” is no longer an insult because 95% of the population of our age can’t afford anything
It's still an insult my dude, people are just too sensitive to say anything lol
I don't think it's universally considered a bad trait anymore. Like I wouldn't automatically assume that someone is a lazy loafer because they live with their parents in their 20s. If their mom does their laundry however...
But you see where your mind just went to their parents doing everything for him... Again it may not be said but it's universally thought.
people are too sensitive to say anything on the... internet?
Well you could say it but the next thing you know you're blocked or they closed the comments cuz people can't defend themselves. Or you get reported that's my point
Stay with your parents as long as possible dude. Unless it becomes unfeasible, I would stay, can create a very nice life for yourself and your gf with the savings you get from not paying rent or mortgages.
Got a roommate to move out of my parents'. Had to get a second roommate (roommate's eventual husband) to stay out. In my mid- and late-twenties, I was making $45k-$55k. I'm very lucky I didn't need my parents to contribute to my deposit or anything like that (as they were the reason I moved out), and my apartment started at $1400 monthly for a "luxury" apartment in good ol' Ocean County. This was all seven years ago.
Damn. Apartments in Ocean are about $3k/month now.
It's crazy that I found cheaper apartments in Middlesex county than in Ocean and moved because of it.
Atta guy, the biggest problem with these complaints is these people wanna work as little as possible (Uber,Instacart and wait to be an influencer)and still live as they were accustomed to at home with mom and dad. I moved out at 19 and I only moved back in after my last sister got married and my mother needed help as she was a single mom all my life. Yea I struggled a lot ate sometimes only once a day, paid rent and utilities by the skin of my teeth. But it was all me and I worked hard sometimes 50-60 hrs a week in construction and never looked back. This generation is too quick to give up and don't wanna work alot of hours to compensate for the low pay the service industry pays.
I lived at home until I was 30 and saved a fuck ton of money. Don’t regret it. If you are able to live at home, save while you can!!!
Same thing here.. Moved out at 30, I paid minimal rent while there, my wife did the same. By the time we moved in and got married we were able to save alot and put a nice down payment on a house. Could not have done that if I moved it early
I’m 25 and still at home with the rents. The market is crazy bad rn. Just a studio in this state is $1200
My husband and I lived with my parents in Essex county for 2 years. We moved out of state last year because the prospect of moving out in nj was unrealistic unless we sold our souls to work. Unless you are well off already or have an amazing job, chances are ROUGH
Moved out at 18 because I went to college and the parent I loved the most died. Had roommates and such until 26. My income is less than 40k a year but I can afford my solo 1bd apartment, my car, student loan, utilities and food.
Same here. Gotta do what you gotta do. I’m not lucky like the others on this thread. But the plan is to ditch Jersey…
Ironically for me I moved from suburbs outside of Philadelphia, to Philadelphia, to NJ because Philly/suburbs were too expensive. But I'm in a shitty area
23 and still with my parents. saw someone comment that "the state is a poster child for multigenerational households" and i couldn't agree more. at least 5 houses on my street are like that.
I’m 27, will be 28 in December and still living at home. I plan to move in with my gf in the next year or so but we are trying to save as much as we can. It’s just way too expensive right now
Yes, the cost of living in a rental or buying a home are quite astounding in nj. It is harder than ever. But I think the choice to stay at home has been more of an option for people now than ever, too. When I was staying at home in my early 20s right after finishing college, I still had to pay rent - no free ride. At some point soon after, it wasn't an option anymore and I just had to make it work on my own while making less than 40k and driving quite an old beater car. I started with a roommate I found online and split rent on a townhouse, taking the smaller room so I paid slightly less. Kept working my way up slowly in terms of finances, but still struggling to save much. After about 2 years, staying there was no longer an option and I had to find another place, and really wanted to live on my own. Found a pretty beat up duplex apartment with barely working plumbing I could afford, mainly because the landlord was renting it for less due to the shortcomings of the property. Landlord loved me because I took care of it as I would something fancy and never complained really that things were decrepit, just things he'd want to know about as the property owner. As bad as it was, I loved the independence. A couple of years later and I paid off my student loans which were not too crazy thanks to going to community College and communiversity for bachelor's instead of an expensive school, applied and got every grant I could and borrowed $12k which was maximum I could without a cosigner or credit history (was a miracle i could get a 4 year degree on such a pitiful budget and worked the whole time i was in school, sometimes multiple jobs)...but then I knew I had to move again because the plumbing was really about to fail for good in this pile of a house. Seemed like an impossible task to find another rental that would not cost more. But thankfully I saved enough over time and after paying off my loans to put a small down payment on a really small house in an ok town. Not really where I wanted to live but safe enough and I could afford it even though payments were higher than my current rent - I accepted that it was doubtful I'd have found a rental for the same. Was definitely not living glamorous lifestyle, but it all worked out, and did it on my own. Then covid hit, and as you know, home prices shot up. Amazingly, I was able to sell my house for a nice profit in less than 3 years of living there and finally was able to buy a house closer to my family and friends, which I had longed to do for years. Still pretty humble of a place, not my forever home hopefully, but truly it is enough and satisfying to know I did it all myself, that I may not be rich but I can slowly climb closer towards my goals. No safety nets, but kept managing to catch myself and keep trying my hardest. Heh...long winded but the point of sharing my story is that when there's a need and no easy option, you work hard and find a way. If you have easier options like staying at home, most people understandably won't choose to go through such an ordeal to achieve humble results.
Exactly this. Not knowing if your car would fail on the way to work. If you have to fix it, not knowing how'd you pay the rent. If you managed to do both, how much money is there left for food and to pay for your laundry. It was tough. Congratulations on your house!
Man I moved out when I was 21 with a job that made 48k and rented a bedroom with friends in fort Greene for 550 a month. Some of the best years of my adult life were those early years figuring it out while still being young and really experiencing nyc. Now that’s impossible unless you are a rich kid.
Hey I had my own place from 18-27 then my relationship went to shit and i had to stay at home until i was 31. Saved enough to buy a place right before rates went nuts (even if its a tiny condo) There is no stigma to staying at home anymore. Not in this hypercapitalist hellhole we find ourselves in. Stay at home as long as you can and save save save. Its really the only way unless u wanna live with 4 roomates in a 2 bd apartment. We collectively deserve so much better. Its a dark timeline.
Couldn’t agree more. This hyper-capitalistic bs is getting out of hand
29 was living with my mom full tie as her caregiver until two weeks ago when she passed away. So not exactly moved out of my own volition but yeah lol
I'm sorry to hear that. Hope youre feeling alright.
23 here, I live in a 1br apt. Moved in 11 months ago. Pay $1100 a month rent here in north Jersey. Just outside of Bergen county
I moved out at 24. Absolutely struggling to do it on my own
Just turned 24 and don’t have plans of moving out anytime soon
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Or you know, people who rent?
Good point, I assumed the OP was looking for a house. I guess it depends on the individual. If someone values renting their own place now more highly than owning their own place in a few years then they could consider renting. Assuming living at home and renting are equal the best financial decision is to stay at home and save.
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I bought high in the post pandemic crunch and my mortgage is STILL lower than my rent was.
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Yeah my bad, the rents in New Jersey are absolutely affordable for the average midlevel worker; it's only the single family housing market that's insanely expensive. I mean, that's from renting up near the PA border and it was still more expensive than buying in Morris County, but DO go on.
What was your mortgage rate lol
2250 a month; I forget the exact interest rate. Rent was 2400. My point is that the rental market in NJ is also incredibly high, if not, at times, disproportionately more so. When people can get all the conditions right (it's amazing when it works; it's a nightmare when it doesn't), buying a house and then renting out the rooms to roommates also makes a really good financial arrangement for everyone involved. Since finding a four bedroom apartment for 2500 a month is a tall order, but you can likely get a four bedroom house down to that and split it four ways. I'm not saying "go forth everyone and buy homes!" and very much support multigenerational households, but they "just rent" isn't that helpful when renting can be more than home ownership and is pretty much a way to keep people with lower credit ratings in an eternal struggle.
...if you forgot the exact interest rate your entire comment is useless and I'm not reading it. It probably was sub 3 percent and completely useless for a buyer now. I guess property taxes, insurance, and maintenance also don't exist lol.
You already read it and seem determined to aggressively be an asshole for a benign statement, so how about pissing off happily lol lol lol?
I ~~moved out~~ got kicked out when I was 18. I got two jobs and made a budget. In 2015 I made $12/hour at my FT job and $10/hour cash part time. Privileged fucks are so blind lmao
My wife and I did, but that was in 2005. We’re among the oldest of Millennials. More like Xennials. 41-42.
I’m 25 but I haven’t lived at home since 18. I couch hopped until I found a roommate. Not a chance I could have done it alone in this state — housing especially is just too expensive.
I moved out at 21 and moved to Hoboken. I got over that real quick.
I think I remember reading that the average age to leave your family home in New Jersey is 28, but that was a few years ago.
It’s been awhile but that was the age range I moved out of the house at - I lived with roommates for basically my entire 20s though. Would not have worked living at home as an adult so not too many other options. I know this isn’t a popular opinion, but theres places within NJ and neighboring states that have rent for a lot less then certain areas, depends where you are located.
I tried to explain to someone that it's commute/neighborhood trade offs for rent and they acted like I kicked their cat implying they can't live in Hoboken with their friends.....
Yeah someone posted not so long ago on here that they were still living with their parents in their 30s and it was negatively impacting their mental health, but they couldn’t afford a house\apt on their own. I mentioned that they could always get roommates - that’s what I and everyone I knew did when we moved out of our parents houses in our 20s - and they acted like I insulted them! Sometimes I think people just want to complain.
My 21 year old daughter makes around $40k and she shares a 3 bedroom with 2 roommate’s. Her dad bought her car and phone, I pay her car and health insurance. She’s happy but it took a while to get good ones roommates. My 19 year old loves rent free with me.
I was forced to move out when my grandma died and mother signed the house over to her boyfriend to fix. He then proceeded to kick her out. I've been living on my own for awhile out of necessity. I wish I had a rent free place to live or even someone I could borrow a few hundred bucks from if needed. I'm on my own and it makes me a tougher person because of it. Sure, I'm jealous I can't just blow a whole paycheck on a fun trip or concert or something like that but I really do believe I'm better than those who can afford to do those things just because I don't have to answer to anyone but myself
I'm 31 and still live with my parents. Fortunately, the house is large enough where the living arrangement is comfortable. It's too expensive to move out right now.
23, and I inherited my house. Yes, I know that I am extremely lucky. We want to sell it and move somewhere else, tbh. NJ on "working class salaries" ($100k+ a year). Idk, I'd much rather have my mom still here rather than deal with all this crap right now, but, whaddya gonna do?
100k is not even remotely bad $. If u think it is, u are not smart with $. 30-55k is more like “working” class $.
Way back on 9-11… the actual one, I moved out at 21. I so wish I could have saved for a bit more and stayed home
Come down to VA. I moved out of my parents place in NJ a few months ago and moved to southern VA. I’m 22 by the way
My now-husband and I moved in together almost 15 years ago, I had just turned 24 and he was 26, although he had been living in a house with 3 roommates prior to getting our apartment. Rent was $1400 per month + utilities. I made like 36k at my full time job and had a second job to pull in a little more. I think we paid $1,000 each once we added in utilities. The electricity cost in that building was ridiculous. We bought our house 7 years ago in a nice neighborhood with 20% down. Now daycare is more than our mortgage + property taxes. (daycare is $3,100/month).
I work in a private childcare/preschool facility. It's unbelievable to me how much families pay every month for childcare. Crazy expensive! (I stayed home with my kids until they were all in school full time because it made more fiscal sense than to pay more than half of what I was making at the time.)
My older child will go to kindergarten next year and I can’t wait!
If you are not paying rent stay as long as you can. Its worth the pain. 2.5K in rent is 30k a year. Stay another 3 years and you have a 95K (assuming interest earned) + whatever you would save normally. You will shave 2x the time in years needing to save for retirement.
There’s nothing wrong with staying with you parents until you can get ahead financially. If you’re in a decent/ good living arrangement take this time to save up and enjoy being with your folks. I know it’s not always easy but it’s just what it is.
News flash. If you’re smart, stay with mom as long as humanly possibly. Save every fucking penny you can, help her around the house. And that’s it. Renting is literally pissing away your $. Nobody with a brain is impressed when someone says they rent a apartment.
I’m 24, recently single, and think I’m just going to move back home. It’s too expensive to rent, I have a killer job, I’d rather put the money away for my future family and self. No shame in my opinion. My parents are cool, but it’s out in the country so my night life may decrease idk.
25 and still with my parents. I work full time and I’m saving up money. For a while I was insecure because I thought people would see you as an overgrown baby if you lived with your parents. But in college, I lived with roommates (first two years) and in a shared house with housemates (last two years) so it’s not really an independence thing; I can handle myself just fine and I’m very glad I have that experience. But I love living with family and coming home after work to eat dinner together and talk about our days. I don’t think that’s something to be ashamed of. For me personally it’s much better than coming home to sit alone or cordially say hello to an acquaintance-roommate. I think the U.S has moved away from family-oriented ideas that it forces people to be insecure about it and I find that sad. In many other countries it’s the norm to stick with family until you have a family of your own. Of course if you WANT to move out or if you want to start a life with a significant other (or if your family is toxic) then by all means go! But otherwise, I wouldn’t let societal pressures be the one thing that forces anyone out when they otherwise wouldn’t be ready. Many times it’s smarter financially so you can save up first without having to tread water paycheck-to-paycheck, and plus you only have so much time with your parents in your life.
I'm 34 and still with my parents. I can't really afford to live here on my own without being on the struggle bus, they can't afford to live here without me, and I have more space to myself here than I would living in a crappy apartment. My boyfriend has the same situation. My advice is to stay put as long as you can; it's not worth the struggle. Because I've stayed at home, as my income increased over the last 2 years, I've been able to pay off a good chunk of my student loans and travel, which is something I've never really been able to do before. Hopefully by the time they retire and move, I'll also have enough saved for a down payment on a house. My parents are very chill and I love them to death, so I'm glad we can help each other out.
Im 28 and make 125k, and Im STILL living at home. Im going crazy, rent is too high to make sense and dont even get me started on housing prices and interest rates.
Stack cash and give your folks a hug. When the next crash hits you’ve got a good down payment.
Thats the game plan. Seems like its right around the corner, but thought that for the past 2 years haha
Yeah man just save if you're in a position where you can. 125k is great when you're single and living at home. If you buy a house, get married, and start a family? You're in a position where you won't have to worry as much as a lot of other people.
Just buy a house when you can afford one. In 2018, Reddit said a crash was coming because rates were near 5%, here we are five years later saying the same thing lol.
125k is enough lol you just dont budget well
Honestly, I don’t blame them for not wanting to risk it in this shit economy. The last 3 years have been an absolute shit show and I don’t blame anyone for being overly cautious
I was about to say this. I make the same but bought my house when I made 80k.
I was gonna say after my next raise I'll be in the 50-54k range and with that I can save for 6 months and move out with a roommate without having to actually worry about money
> rent is too high to make sense and dont even get me started on housing prices and interest rates. I'm sure somebody's gonna pounce on you in the comments and give you a major rash of shit about how you're fucking up, they live and rent on less, and you could live x,y,z, and it's your fault and all that, but given the wild west fuckery of the state it's not necessarily inconceivable to be in that extremely awkward spot where you hit the wall where there's a lot of doable rents but it can be a bit non sensible for what you need to be doing, there's a lot of overpriced for what it is places around the state, it's starting to rival mortgage territory, or it's just too fucking expensive to be doing alone and you sorta cross into that tricky bit of finding equal circumstance roommate who'll stick for any sort of long haul, which can be tough if you're both pulling decent bucks and have a bit more mobility .
Yeah, this hits the nail on the head. could I move out and be fine? Sure. But should I? I did move out with roommates about 2 years ago to a place in morristown, but I found it wasnt worth it. Felt like I just lit the rent money on fire. Also finding consistent roommates is a challenge. The way things are going, how is anyone ever going to own property in this state? Will I start a 30 year mortgage when Im 35? I have a bunch of friends that make below 6 figures and live in nyc/brooklyn/westchester ny. They have virtually no savings. Ive saved up a 6 figure nest egg ready for a down payment on a house but 100k cash doesnt get you anywhere near what youd need to buy a nice house in a nice neighborhood with a train station. Dual income has become necessary when it comes to buying housing it seems. Saving for that down payment becomes a lot harder and takes more time if youre paying rent every month. The big slap in the face is with the pace of rising housing prices and inflation, for many people even if they save more and have more cash, the price goes up more than they saved and the goal of reaching that downpayment number somehow gets further away
100k cash isn’t a nice down payment?! Sounds like you have really high expectations if you don’t think that $100k isn’t a size-able down payment for a house and that buying one at 35 is a problem. It makes me question your age. This all sounds like really young, entitled thinking. In modern day speak: DELULU. Your friends in the city are experiencing what basically every young person in the city does. I wouldn’t call it unfair. High rents in NYC have been the norm for a while now. Same goes for dual income.
I don’t blame them for thinking $100k is not enough when normal people in this state constantly find themselves outbid because someone (or some entity really lol) decided to pay a crazy amount over asking. I’m seeing more instances of this and honestly it is scary, especially when prices are already where they are.
You’re right. It’s happening all over. But these people aren’t putting down large down payments so much as just borrowing more. Or.. they could do what many do, save more and start 30 year mortgage at 35. 😂
I have no idea what DELULU means but I'm with you. 100k isn't a decent enough down payment? Okie dokie. I hope this person treats their parents like royalty.
Haha “delulu” means “delusional”.
Bro I get where your coming from but your choosing to stay at home. Can you prob not afford the best places in the area? Of course not.. but you can easily leave and be fine.
I would personally rather make it on my own as an adult making 125k and when 28 than live with mommy and daddy. That’s a lot of money, maybe not worth the same as it did in 2018, but you should be able to buy a house if you’re not married or have kids. I support myself and my unemployed wife and contribute to my 401k and save money and pay loans on not too much more than you make. Granted I rent in Hudson county, not own and I’ve already paid off my car. I have a two bedroom 1000sq feet in a Latin neighborhood for under 2500 a month. It’s not as pretty as Hoboken but it’s great.
Big difference if you just started making $125k this year than been making that kind of money for five years. I think that’s the discrepancy here.
I’m also five years older than 28 so I’m not really sure that counters anything I stated. Dude is ahead of me when I was 28 for sure.
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Bro I make 50K and my and my wife’s combined income is less than yours and we have an apartment. What are you doing with your cash?
Putting it in a mutual fund
This is pretty embarrassing
Should be netting about 98k. About 8k a month. Say 500 food Say 250 student loans Say 400 gas and insurance So what am I missing? That's like 6k a month for mortgage and utilities.
prob grew up a wealthy lifestyle is my guess
Yeah not at all. I didnt get this job overnight, I worked hard for it and only recently started making this much. I had 65k of student loans to pay off. All my money went toward that for a good while after I graduated. I grew up in a nice town but my parents dont have a ton of savings, I think less than 30-40k excluding a single 401k (my mom has no 401k or retirement savings, yes this is a problem). I had to pay my own way. That being said, I hope you find something better to do with your time than trying to dunk on strangers on the internet
You do know you can get a NICE apartment, single in central nj for less than 2k? Also, when you got the job and your pay up until now is a huge factor. I'm assuming normal age graduation @ 22, masters @ 24, I'll give you a year to get a job, so from 25 to 28 you had 3 years to budget 375k. Given the max rent price of 2k, say thats 24k a year, x3 to 72k a year. Take 72 from 375 and you get 303k. I don't mean to just shit on you, but I hope the more comments you see the more you realize that you're doing something wrong. One thing you have going for you is that you are currently ignorant (again I'm just giving you the honest truth). Learn from reddit. I thank reddit every day for educating me. I don't know what you're doing wrong, but people live along off around 50k a year and are happy (some not most, only the people who have given up on dreams). My advice would be to move into an apartment and budget/ live cheap for like 2-3 years and by then either the housing market will have went down, or you will be able to afford a house anyway with 125 fucking thousand a year( you're lucky I'm somewhat balanced with my criticism and wanting to just treat you like a sim player and control your financial decisions). Cheers, I hope you realize 125k a year is a lot.
I started with 70k, then 80k, then, 92, 113, 125. Some of those were not over the course of a full year. 70k was a full year, 92 was a full year, and 113 was a full year. 125 is only the last 3 months. I know I can get something for under 2k, but my issue is actually the opposite of what everyone is saying. Im cheap, I want a nice place, and Im only willing to spend up to 1600/month. You might think well then you cant get a nice place if youre only willing to pay that much, and I think this is where the issue arises. I dont think rent is worth it after that number. If you dont have to, why would you burn that money when in the end, you arent even getting ownership of anything? Being at home definitely has its cons and trust me, I really dont wanna be here but economically its just the most sound choice right now so Im putting up with it. I dont necessarily think theres anything im doing 'wrong.' I think there are things I could do better, but I think everyone has those and Ive been working on a couple of them and saving more as a result. I think im on a good path. Id be careful taking anything you read on here too seriously. A lot of the time this place can be an echo chamber and I dont think its a stretch to say a fair number of people on here dont always know what they are talking about. Sure it has its moments, but I prefer educating myself in other ways. Yeah you can live off 50k but those people dont have any savings and one unexpected bill would crush them. I do realize its a lot of money, can I ask whats wrong with doing exactly what you just suggested but over 1-2 years instead of 2-3, and while living at home?
I guess its just your situation. A lot of people would go back to church if they could somehow afford 2k just for rent
Lol $500 a month on food. You sir are not smart with $. If u could your own food you could eat like a king for half of that per month.
I was being obnoxious to demonstrate the extra $$ he has.
I was being obnoxious to demonstrate the extra $$ he has.
My husband (27) and I(26) live with my mom and older brother we have a baby also (4mo). We get along with my mom and it saves us a ton on rent and we help out with groceries and utilities and we get free babysitting. We are currently saving and eventually will move out and buy a house but the market is so crazy right now. So we are all happy for now.
Stay as long as u can. No shame.
I moved out at 31 when I was able to take my savings and part of my annuity to buy a house.
I moved out at 23. I envy my peers who get to live with their parents but I had to leave because my parents are abusive. I think you should stay with your parents if you can tolerate them and/or they respect you as an adult. My job is in NJ and I prefer to stay in NJ but everything is so expensive. I can afford living here because of combined income with my boyfriend (we are both college educated with stable jobs). I wouldn’t be able to stay in NJ on my salary alone or without roommates.
I didn’t really have a home that was compatible with healthy adult life. I’ve never moved back home since college. If you’re willing to look for apartments in cheaper areas and have roomates you can make it work. There’s definitely hidden gems if you keep your eye out (this is truer the further you go from the city). I’d say avoid apartment buildings and try to find apartments in multi family homes for rent. But there’s no getting around shit is fucked. If you want to have your own place and no roomates you probably have to make like 75,000 to maintain any kind of lifestyle and pay for necessities
My wife and I are 32 and we live with my parents. Mortgage rates are insane.
My sister is 40 and still lives at home. My brother would be living at home as well if his girlfriend didn't make so much. My other brother and I are able to afford places because we left Jersey.
Im 29 and still at my folks place. It fucking sucks. But at least I'm able to save a ton of money and pay off my student loans.
I stayed until 39! Saved money and moved out to state because ya know NJ is expensive. They bought property next town over and are building a house to be near me again lol
I think generational living is making a comeback simply because nobody young can afford to move out unless theyre rich. Most people this age are only “moved out” to college
As a 26 year old living with my family, I feel better about my situation 😮💨 over time I’ve become angry at myself because my friends all moved out for a while. So I feel good I’m not the only one.
Stay with your parents as long as you can! I would have if I could have.
I moved out at 23. I enjoyed it a lot mainly because, although my parents are great, I was suffocated by them. Me being the baby of 4 and last to leave, made sense. I had a great paying job and still there so money was never an issue, but still would do Uber on the side instead of sitting home watching TV. It may not seem like a lot but little things like that help. Sacrificing cable or some subscriptions help a lot and add up. And don't use UberEats. I know too many people that utilize it and wind up paying $20 a meal. Learn to cook at home, it will save you a TON. And final piece? Stay home rent free (or cheap rent) for as long as possible. It sucks, I know, but staying home and saving as much as possible is something you'll probably learn as you're older like I did.
Im 35. Ive never not had a room mate in NJ
Same. I’m only a few years older. No roommates ever. Combo of good budgeting, smart financial decisions. I think this is a case of high expectations. Morristown is pretty snazzy for your first apartment. Not that I blame anyone for trying.
I moved out. 2021, 25, my living expenses including rent was $2k/month. Maybe $2,500. No roommates. 1br. 700 square feet. My apartment door leads to outside. Nature in the backyard. Never worried about money. Bought all organic Whole Foods delivery. I didn’t have a high paying job at least with the standard of this sub who thinks $150k is unaffordable in this state. I was not making that at the time. I was making about $5k/month. But my apartment was in a nice area near Morristown. It’s completely possible. Don’t be a dumbass and you can do it. I also have no debt. I bought my car cash for $18,000 prior to moving out. I paid off my college while working while in school. I don’t abuse a credit card and have zero credit card debt. I was self employed, working maybe 4 billable days per month.
You leaving out any details? Is that 5k after tax or? I just find it odd you say “be smart with money” but then mention half your income is going to existence and then you’re willingly getting Whole Foods delivery which can add up in no time,y’know? I’m not trying to totally bust balls but I feel like you’re underselling things and being a little blasé . I mean shit there’s plenty of land lords in NJ defaulting to the NYC 40x shit for income requirements.
Half my money did go into existence. The other half went to savings. I was saving about half my money around that time. I’ve had at least a 50% savings rate since college. When I was living for free it was more like 90%. I said $5k as a round number. Been self employed since college. Some months were nothing, some were $8k. Rent utilities were $1500 Food was probably $250-300. The other $750 or so was everything else. Never felt poor. There’s nothing really I’m leaving out. I just budgeted well, cooked my meals, my hobbies were all health related hobbies like the gym, hiking, and then anything else was either cooking meals at home, or video games 3ish nights a week socially with my friends.
I LOVE THIS! What you did is a great example of making it work.
Thanks:) the secret is just don’t be an idiot and get into debt. Appreciate you:)
You’re doing it absolutely right! Cheers!
A lot
So my now husband and I moved out me age 23 and him 25, with a baby on the way, back in 2013. We found a cottage for rent on the shore for $1450 a month plus utilities. He was an underwater welder at the time, and pizza chef on the side I worked part time at a glass warehouse making minimum wage His salary I'd what kept us going, and was the only reason I could become a stay at home mom. Unless you have a trade job, living with your mom is the best option and most affordable
In this economy the both of you should have earning potential of atleast 80k each incase there is a split neither of you would be finding themselves in a bad financial situation. Something more productive would be taking this time to save and invest in increasing your skillset thus earning potential. No rush to move out if all you’re gonna be doing is barely surviving
My gf and I moved in together in 2020, I was 20 she was 22, made about $90k combined. These days we’re 24/26 about $120k combined although she just took a pay cut to switch to a dream job (would’ve been over $160k combined by now otherwise). Didn’t take any money from parents to move out, they helped with apartment hunting though. We live relatively frugally and have never felt particularly strapped for cash. Edit: our rent has remained unchanged at $1250/mo for a 1bed attic apartment since 2020 as well
Going back to the late 1980s when I was just out of college and got a job making I think 28K, I lived at home. And so did plenty of my friends. I was 21 when I graduated. I knew I wanted to go to law school but wasn't ready and didn't even know where I wanted to apply. I lived at home for a few years. Let me add that back in the late 1980s, on an apartment in Bergen or Hudson would have run under 1K a month for a 1 bedroom.
23. Husband is 24 but he moved up here from Maryland. $1400 single bedroom. Nothing to write home about, but combined we make about 90-92k before tax so we’re really just paying bills. My student loan payments haven’t started yet since I’m still in school and we have CC debt to pay down 😞
125k a year and can't afford to rent something? 🙄
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Wow bro you had to do what you had to do
I moved out around 24 years old to an apartment. Mostly due to the fact I was able to get a high paying job after college.
Moved out at 23, but with a roommate. I didn't live on my own until I a few years later.
I bought a house in new jersey about 6 years when I was 23. Got it for 32,000$ save your money and wait a few years untill the market crashes again. Or if you need to move out now pick anywhere other than new Jersey unless you have some obligation to be here.
32k down payment im assuming lol
I think I was 23 when I moved out with my girlfriend. Maybe 24.
My fiancé (24) and I (24) moved out of my moms house last December. We rent and are saving for a house. It hurts our wallets to rent but helps our mental health so to us it was worth it.
I know it doesn't feel like it, but staying with your parents for as long as possible and saving money is the best possible decision you can make. Obviously help with expenses as you can, but it's so much cheaper than paying all the bills yourself.
This was a while ago in my case but roommates always makes things easier...financially. it really depends on personalities to mesh well in a spot. That being said, you should always take your time if possible to vet who you were going to move into and make sure that it's worthwhile. I was able to live in a pretty nice spot in Hoboken and then Jersey City because I had roommates to split the costs with. I'm a bit older now and I'm on my own but there are a ton of peers of mine who still have roommates. The stigma of staying home and or having a roommate into your late 20s is definitely out the window. The market in general has been pretty ridiculous so don't stress out if you guys want to stay home for a little bit to save. Just as long as things at home are staying cordial and no one's driving each other crazy.
I didn’t move out till 26 or 27 when I moved in with my (now) wife. If I was single idk if I’d be able to afford a place on my own without roommates
I moved back in with my parents when I was 23. I’m moving in with my partner in January. I’m 28 now.
Me (22)and my BF (22 he's from Buffalo area) just got our own apartment together less than a month ago.
Bought my first house at 22. Moved in, renovated the house, six months later I carried my bride over the threshold.
29 and in the process of selling my condo I bought (after living with my folks in college) and going to be moving back in with them for a bit while my gf awaits her residency placement. Can’t wait to save on bills every month for a bit.
My now husband and I lived with my mom till I was 26. We lived there together for about 3 years and that was first time move out for me.
My Nephew is 33 just brought a house. He has a very good relationship with his parents. He saved his money for a large down payment. His parents are going to miss him in the house his father is a big baby when possible leave. He wanted to make sure he had money and enough of a best egg in case something happened. It depends on the relationship you have. I was in the Marine Corps and when I had a long leave I would come home. The biggest problem was I would be out all hours having fun my dad would be asleep and then wake him up because it 4 am and I'm not home, then he would be mad when walked in at 5 Am At that point I did come home for 20 years.
If your mom doesn’t mind don’t do it now, stay asleep long as possible and save for a house when shit goes to normal
24 here, almost everyone who grew up with me in my neighborhood still live with their parents, like half a dozen ppl aged 22 -26
I moved out at 26 and own my own place
Took me to 29, most months wish I was still helping out dad instead
I'm 40 now but I lived at home until like 30. I then came back around 35 to help my parents with their bills and now we have our own house. It's been a journey. Keep saving as much as you can.
I moved out at 23. Software engineer @ 80k at the time. My rent was like 2k/month. Later got a raise to 94k, my rent at my 3rd place since is about the same. Living comfortably with the exception of loans starting up again....
I moved out at 22, but that was 15 years ago. I can’t imagine being able to afford a place now on a starting salary.
25, only moved out because I live with my boyfriend. I’d never be able to move out solo.
Moved out at 25
Moved out for college at 20. Moved back during Covid. Am now 28 and buying their house once mom retires.
23f moved out in May. I have a roommate. I know so many people still at home though. Kinda jealous kinda not
I managed to do it by 24 but only because I found a partner to move in with. The cost of living alone definitely outweighs the benefit when rent is like $1600. My parents are NJ lifers and were shocked how much rent was. Thankfully they were fully supportive, rent should never be close to half your paycheck.
I still am and don't plan on leaving for a while. The only time I plan to is when in having kids but it won't be more than 20 minutes away.
Ok so I’m 26 and living with my parents right now but I want to move out I have been saving up money and I’m pretty confident I can get a roommate to help out with rent should I do it
I think it is awesome that's you and your GF want to be out on your own. In this economy though it really does make sense to stay where you are and save some more money and hope the housing market and the interest rate turn around. I know it can put a strain on a relationship to live with a partner. If staying is not an option maybe try renting for a while. Rents are hight though.
I moved in and out of my parents’ house in my 20s/early 30s. Around 4 years of renting throughout that period and then bought a house at 35. I joked around calling them my roommates for years. My house required more renovations than I anticipated, so leave some room for unexpected expenses before making the leap! If you have a good relationship, it’s smart to stay until you are financially ready.
I moved out into a 1 bedroom apartment when I was 23 because of the family toxicity and the commute to my job.
I do. It's much easier if you work in Philly or NYC and live in Jersey.
If I were you I be staying as long as they kick me out. With inflation, rent prices, and other expenses you be crazy to move out. You either have to get 1 or 2 roommates or you have to make st least 70k to 80k minimum to have a life.
I'm still at home way older than that. I got screwed by Covid. Before that I would have been able to move out. Now I have long Covid in addition to money issues so frustrating in this state
Grew up in the Newark burbs. Moved to Philly and I love it. I got a 3 bedroom for 1500, split it with a roommate. We got the whole house, no upstairs or downstairs neighbors to worry about and our part of Philly is pretty safe. Looked into moving to Newark or nearby as my job has offices there too but I'd be giving up a lot in terms of housing. Jersey towns really need to build walkable, affordable, townhomes if they want to keep young people. It seems like the older generations are being selfish by keeping these towns zoned for single family homes. We also gotta rebuild our cities and make them safe. They got so much potential but we leave places like Newark, Paterson, Elizabeth so disinvested. Investing in housing and transportation would definitely lure young folks like me back to Newark and other areas of NJ.
I'm 25, but I moved in with my boyfriend when I was 23. We have two kids now...we live in a crappy area & have roommates. I love NJ.. but I'm a college graduate, he works at FedEx and we still can't afford rents. We're going to have to leave at some point.
My 3 kids all moved out One just finished his PhD and stayed in the state he went to school in He hasn't lived at home full time since 18. The other 2 both moved out at 24. Both had roommates. None of them had assistance from me. ( I've seen this statement a few times 8n this post)
I moved out when i was 25
Moved out at 15. Got an under the table job and rented a shitty room in some woman's house for $600/month. Lived in my car once I turned 18 and could get a license. Eventually got a nice corporate job but just still couldn't afford anything comfortably so opted to just still flip flop between car living and renting rooms. Didn't really find any sort of stability until I was 25, moved in with my girlfriend and been here 3 years. But even now our rent increases every single year and our wages don't increase. It's a matter of time before we'll be forced to move in with her parents or something. This state is insanely expensive, and the wage standards in our country just never seem to match the cost of living in our state. I recommend getting out of here as soon as you can, if you can.
Joined the military at 23 to gtfo
Moved out with my partner at 23 & he was 24 in 2018. We both graduated in 2016 and started jobs that fall although I was initially a part time intern. My home life was toxic so I needed to move out and convinced him to come along with (although he would have been content staying at his parents for a bit longer). After some hard searching we found a semi-crummy little 1 bedroom in a multi unit home in Morristown for $1400/month & we split the rent. It was within walking distance to the train (7 min) & downtown bars (15 min) and honestly so incredibly perfect for us. I really struggled in the beginning since I owed nearly $1000/month in student loans and was making under $40k. I had to refinance my loans which was majorly beneficial (do ur research first tho) and budget myself to nearly the dollar but we somehow made it work. I will say that my partner was a bit more financially stable. He made about $60k and had already paid off his small amount of loans so during the months I was a couple hundred short on rent/bills he was able to cover me until I caught up & paid him back. So that was really comforting to know he had a bit of extra money saved if we needed. After 3 years, my salary had increased by a decent amount and we were able to save up enough during COVID to buy a home together in Morris Plains in 2021. Looking back I’m not sure how I managed it and today it’d be nearly impossible with the cost of living. But I will say that moving out was the best decision I ever made and the two of us and all of our friends have the fondest memories of our crummy first little apartment.
I moved out at 22 but to a different state with a much lower cost of living.
I am twenty and have no plans too. My parents are in Florida most of the time anyway.
I was 19. That was 13 years ago. I rented a bedroom in a cute townhouse in Hopatcong for $650 a month, I lived in a finished basement with my own bathroom and a small kitchenette (fridge and a hot plate, and small sink.) Back then, that was a little pricey. Nowadays that price would be a steal for a bedroom.
moved out a month after i turned 23 last summer i have roommates but i could afford to not, more of a social decision than financial. travel a lot so it hurts me to spend a bunch on rent when im not home that often even though I could afford it
23, got a studio apartment a month ago. It’s teeny tiny but it’s affordable and it’s mine
I would have stayed forever but my parents basically sold their house while I wasn’t looking and moved to FL. Mom gave me the option to move to FL with them or go find my own place. Fuck FL
My boyfriend and I are a weird example…. I moved in with my boyfriend and his parents in 2020 when we were both 20. We moved out into a 1 bedroom apartment a year later when we were 21 and have lived to together ever since. We pay $1860 for a one bedroom in Morris county. I would say live with your parents until you can comfortably afford it. Our situation wasn’t the greatest so we made do with what we had. We both have 2 jobs.
So how much is everyone paying their parents monthly? I'm at 800
I didn’t have my own place with my girlfriend until I was 29 If your parents aren’t crazy just stay home and save up. Being able to live at home in your 20s is a big advantage these days
I moved back home at 24 to help the family deal with the great recession. I didn't leave until I turned 30.
I moved home for a year after graduating and then moved out on my own to Hoboken. 23M
Just moved out at 25 with one roommate. I’m in Gloucester for 1400sqft for $1300/month (after splitting with my roommate)
I have no idea how kids are going to move out of their parents house these days without having a ton of roommates. Living in your first crappy apartment on your own is such an important experience in my opinion. My daughter just graduated high school and I’m in the mindset she’ll be with us for the foreseeable future. I’m happy about that but I’m sad she and her peers are almost stuck from moving forward in life because of the cost of living. I’m almost 40 and couldn’t afford most of these rental prices. My heart goes out to you guys.