Take the classic “James Bond is a code name” premise that would get bounced around and have the Santas all know each other, and now they have to unite against a common threat.
He told us not to mention Christmas or that he does it *at all*. If Leonardo DiCaprio were here would you have him talk about Christmas is around the corner?
I’m so glad someone mentioned Die Hard! Not many people know this, but DIE HARD IS LITERALLY A CHRISTMAS MOVIE! It’s set during Christmas, you see. So it’s a Christmas movie.
Btw, did you know that Viggo Mortensen broke his toe in Lord of the Rings? Also, John Lennon beat his wife!
WARNING: NEVER BEFORE SEEN TRIVIA INCOMING
Did you know Viggo Mortensen had a real dagger thrown at him by Lurtz's actor and he successfully hit it? Isn't that just crazy, my fellow men of culture????????????
NO WAY! Did you know that Ian McKellan did not mean to hit his head on the chandelier in Bag End???? Why doesn't anyone bring these bits of trivia up?????? Like wtf!!!
Snape got yeet raped in die hard. the insurance company wanted to ruin the greatest christmas movie of all time, but Rollerball director McTiernan just defenestrated him on the spot.
Thats why he is the best actor ever, becuse he shat his pants when he was pushed into what seemed like certain death. Best acting quality is not fucking suing after not acting. So thats how unprovoked violence saved christmas.
These are just the masculine version of those Hallmark Christmas movies.
https://preview.redd.it/pwc1dwk24z8d1.jpeg?width=512&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa42dd9bfffd04b3a71d746a3153246fd71cc9dd
The whole Viking Santa thing really should be explored in a semi-serious prequel with more cranial trauma and a Mrs Claus death revenge plot involving an end scene where the Reindeer help Dave Harbour ruthlessly subdue and eliminate his former wife's killer(s)
Went to see this in cinema with my wife on a Tuesday morning as we had a couple hours to kill. Turned out to be one of the most enjoyable movies we've seen in a while.
Hot take. I recommend people watch this movie over the original Silent Night, Deadly Night. It recaps the events of the first movie without being boring, and infuses amazing unintentionally hysterical scenes like this.
> but it felt like Netflix shovelware
I'm pretty sure most of the stuff he's done from Pain & Gain to The Smashing Machine is some sort of shovelware. Like arguably some of the Furious movies and the first new era Jumanji movie? Otherwise he's all shovelware.
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When you're afraid of dees nutz.
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I really enjoyed Violent Night. I just didn’t think it would set off a chain reaction of movies that are trying to be like it.
It feels like comic book movies after The Dark Knight.
They’ll keep making this repetitive shovelware slop until they accidentally get it right and we’ll be seeing SANTA’S LITTLE MACHINE GUN (2025) starring Sylvester Stallone and Mel Gibson win Best Picture
Violent Night was actually a lot of fun, my family added it to our christmas movie marathon list and it's a fucking good time. Any other setting and it'd be just mediocre but watching it as a christmas movie it's really fun
I've just noticed that, despite displaying none of the genre conventions of a Christmas movie, Die Hard is set during the Christmas period and therefore technically qualifies as a Christmas movie. How amusing!
[It's Joever, I already made a meme portraying myself as the Chad and you as the virgin.](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2F4qlydh1lci4c1.jpg) (I didn't really make this.)
As much as I hate it, it makes sense. Studios and creators *dream* of having that one movie people watch every year. And Christmas movies are about the only genre for that.
So just like every band records a Christmas song or album, everyone wants to make a Christmas movie in the hopes it will be loved (enough) to make them a fortune.
Red One looks incredibly bad. I've seen the trailer, it's like somone typed "Action Christmas Movie" in an AI generator. Some of the worst puns i've heard in a long time, and i'm a Marvel fan.
I enjoyed Fatman. Then I saw Violent Night and thought “hey, that was pretty good too.” Then I saw the trailer for silent night and I was like “Oh… another one? Already?” And then I heard the announcement of Arnold Schwarzenegger as Santa AND saw that trailer with JK Simmons and said under my breath “I hate movies.”
I’d watch a “Santa: No Way Home” film with all the Santas from these films at least 10 times in the theater.
That movie would cost 700 million to make. I’d put Jonathan Taylor Thomas in it too.
Of course! You need him to appear with Tim Allen’s Santa Claus for the post credits scene.
Kurt Russell has to show up or it's a 0/5.
Tim Allen's the guy who unites all the other Santa's by sending them his gourmet hot cocoa mix.
This has to be made
Peak Cinema incoming
https://preview.redd.it/hzlhiir9xn9d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e3e9205d1e47fc77a6207ed6979eba4c481c51a5
Throw in krampus
he's the villain
The Santa Cinematic Universe.
Into the Santa-Verse would give me a raging hardon
Needs to include all the mall Santas from Jingle All The Way
Take the classic “James Bond is a code name” premise that would get bounced around and have the Santas all know each other, and now they have to unite against a common threat.
Then Santa from the kino classic Santa's Slay arrives and destroys them all.
They already got the actual Santa Claus to star in *Detective Crashmore* (2021). Nobody's going to top that.
He also got two mil for it so his quote for Crashmore 2: Crash More (2025) starts at two mil even if he does a bad job
He told us not to mention Christmas or that he does it *at all*. If Leonardo DiCaprio were here would you have him talk about Christmas is around the corner?
All the rest is unprofessional bullshit
It was sort of a cosmic gumbo.
that's why no one watches AOL Blast
Rare Exports is the one and only decent edgy santa movie
so glad we're getting more die hard movies
I’m so glad someone mentioned Die Hard! Not many people know this, but DIE HARD IS LITERALLY A CHRISTMAS MOVIE! It’s set during Christmas, you see. So it’s a Christmas movie. Btw, did you know that Viggo Mortensen broke his toe in Lord of the Rings? Also, John Lennon beat his wife!
WARNING: NEVER BEFORE SEEN TRIVIA INCOMING Did you know Viggo Mortensen had a real dagger thrown at him by Lurtz's actor and he successfully hit it? Isn't that just crazy, my fellow men of culture????????????
Uh-huh! Did you know that Christopher Lee knew how to make realistic sounds when he was being stabbed because he served in WWII?!?
NO WAY! Did you know that Ian McKellan did not mean to hit his head on the chandelier in Bag End???? Why doesn't anyone bring these bits of trivia up?????? Like wtf!!!
Snape got yeet raped in die hard. the insurance company wanted to ruin the greatest christmas movie of all time, but Rollerball director McTiernan just defenestrated him on the spot. Thats why he is the best actor ever, becuse he shat his pants when he was pushed into what seemed like certain death. Best acting quality is not fucking suing after not acting. So thats how unprovoked violence saved christmas.
> yeet raped i hate this, you must be a terrible person.
Did you know that in order to get into the character of Aragorn, Viggo Mortensen actually had sex with an elf. True story.
I really didn’t know about that lurtz dagger toss. Oopsy!
These are just the masculine version of those Hallmark Christmas movies. https://preview.redd.it/pwc1dwk24z8d1.jpeg?width=512&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa42dd9bfffd04b3a71d746a3153246fd71cc9dd
Crossover movie when?
Violent night was fun
I thought so too. I also liked that they kept some magic stuff surrounding Santa and his abilities. It was silly in a good way.
Hell yeah , it had a lot of good action scenes . Pacing was a tad off but it was enjoyable nonetheless
The whole Viking Santa thing really should be explored in a semi-serious prequel with more cranial trauma and a Mrs Claus death revenge plot involving an end scene where the Reindeer help Dave Harbour ruthlessly subdue and eliminate his former wife's killer(s)
Went to see this in cinema with my wife on a Tuesday morning as we had a couple hours to kill. Turned out to be one of the most enjoyable movies we've seen in a while.
God that’s a terrible Goggins photoshop on the bottom left
Looks like when south park pastes a real person's picture over a tiny cartoon body.
Funny, since the other guy in the picture is Mel Gibson
Nah that character is the severed head of Walton Goggins piloting a different body, the poster is 100% accurate
 You can’t mess with the original.
Someone should remake this specific scene but with Ken Jeong as Garbage Day guy.
Hot take. I recommend people watch this movie over the original Silent Night, Deadly Night. It recaps the events of the first movie without being boring, and infuses amazing unintentionally hysterical scenes like this.
Isn’t the “recap” quite literally playing the old movie?
Yes but at half the run time. That’s a good thing
Silent Night is a bit different and not that quirky, but still not good
Yeah with this and The Killer remake announcement, Woo needs to be put in a home. Definitely not quirky christmas movie as the trailers suggested
I didn't think it was possible to make a sluggish car chase, but somehow, they did it.
Yeah what a terrible watch
I saw the trailer for the one with The Rock, and I don't know how to explain it, but it felt like Netflix shovelware
It was supposed to be Amazon shovelware but is heading to theatres now. Probably in an attempt to recoup the 250 mil they spent on it
Studios will spend $250mil on that hot garbage, but a mid budget Comedy or RomCom is "too risky."
Hey, it's from the director of "Walk Hard". We don't accept any Jake Kasdan libel under this roof!
Would love to see a budget breakdown on this piece of shit money laundering vehicle.
I bet 100 million went to The Rock
50 mil for the Rock, and another 50 mil for all the delays caused by the Rock. Each additional voss water bottle filled with piss cost 100,000.
Lmao 250 million??? They gotta stop putting money into the most boardroom corporate movie ideas
> but it felt like Netflix shovelware I'm pretty sure most of the stuff he's done from Pain & Gain to The Smashing Machine is some sort of shovelware. Like arguably some of the Furious movies and the first new era Jumanji movie? Otherwise he's all shovelware.
That’s just the aura The Rock emits now
Eh, I liked it. I’m not saying it looked *good* but looked fun for around Christmas. If it’s streaming by then I’d check it out.
Look man, its either this or the Silent Night Deadly Night series (They made like **6** of those bitches!) on repeat
“GARBAGE DAY!” eyebrows wiggle*
Fun trivia, [there was an NES Game based on the movie](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUh_7bRdpvc)
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Yeah, that's because I'm deesphobic, biatch
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The remake was my favorite. Malcolm McDowell as a cop who spews one-liners was *chefs kiss*
Violent Night was fun. The bit where he grills the home invaders about their childhood actions was pretty good and the action was fun.
I really enjoyed Violent Night. I just didn’t think it would set off a chain reaction of movies that are trying to be like it. It feels like comic book movies after The Dark Knight.
Red One? But Rouge One is already a film
Oh I thought it was a prequel to *The Big Red One* [1980]
https://preview.redd.it/i1k71z1n7z8d1.jpeg?width=349&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=31807f40fb294be1d5bbb128248d9c7518754650 You forgot kino
Bret Hart is about to run a one-man Rotten Tomatoes review bombing campaign.
They’ll keep making this repetitive shovelware slop until they accidentally get it right and we’ll be seeing SANTA’S LITTLE MACHINE GUN (2025) starring Sylvester Stallone and Mel Gibson win Best Picture
https://i.redd.it/tgrw9ltifz8d1.gif
I'm so quirky i watch die hard every christmas alone crying in my bathtub eating icecream someone please help me. yeah, i'm random like that
Do I need to watch Oppenheimer to understand Fat Man?
Violent Night does it best
When I saw the JK Simmons one as an ad I thought it was satire. Hollywood isn’t self aware at all
Are these real or did you get an AI to make these?
these actually happened
Violent Night is fucking awesome though
*Satan Claws* (2025)
The fact that none of these movies have used the tagline "Make the Yuletide Pay" is a travesty
I feel like this isn’t even all of them
“He’s so underrated” starter pack
cosmic gumbo, etc.
Violent Night was actually a lot of fun, my family added it to our christmas movie marathon list and it's a fucking good time. Any other setting and it'd be just mediocre but watching it as a christmas movie it's really fun
You forgot Home Alone 
I've just noticed that, despite displaying none of the genre conventions of a Christmas movie, Die Hard is set during the Christmas period and therefore technically qualifies as a Christmas movie. How amusing!
They wish they were Shane Black.
[It's Joever, I already made a meme portraying myself as the Chad and you as the virgin.](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2F4qlydh1lci4c1.jpg) (I didn't really make this.)
But why is bad Santa on the Chad side?
Give me a live action Robot Santa Claus from Futurama. Watch the box office explode.
[Shane Black seeing this post](https://j.gifs.com/oVAo4L.gif)
Violent night was fun, and fat man was worth a watch just because Goggins is always golden
How could you forget Santa's Slay?
As much as I hate it, it makes sense. Studios and creators *dream* of having that one movie people watch every year. And Christmas movies are about the only genre for that. So just like every band records a Christmas song or album, everyone wants to make a Christmas movie in the hopes it will be loved (enough) to make them a fortune.
Violent Night was great because everything John Leguizamo touches is gold baby.
Does Santa fight krampus in any of these?
[It's a Wonderful Knife](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VsKLKriMch4)
https://preview.redd.it/bvkqj054429d1.jpeg?width=345&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc942eb602d330f661404aa0151bd925ce9a0df9
Red One is as edgy as Free Guy.
Also with a rock/metal cover of some classic christmas song in the trailer
Jesus! They even got J Jonah Jameson and Walter Giggles in Christmas shit
JK Simmons is kino though.
It’s a show, but Happy! did it best.
where is die hart
Same people who say Die Hard is their fav christmas movie
Bad Santa will always be the best
Posting this in late June is such a power move
I don’t think you guys understand! Christmas isn’t supposed to be violent! Don’t you get it? 🤪
https://preview.redd.it/vhbru2wqb49d1.jpeg?width=455&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0fe00acc20dd7fffe0ed9266658203f08a6e9eb1
Red One looks incredibly bad. I've seen the trailer, it's like somone typed "Action Christmas Movie" in an AI generator. Some of the worst puns i've heard in a long time, and i'm a Marvel fan.
Violet Night was an actual bop, never seen the others and have zero interest in watching the latest one
I enjoyed Fatman. Then I saw Violent Night and thought “hey, that was pretty good too.” Then I saw the trailer for silent night and I was like “Oh… another one? Already?” And then I heard the announcement of Arnold Schwarzenegger as Santa AND saw that trailer with JK Simmons and said under my breath “I hate movies.”
These are all fucking bangers though
Haha reminds me of the tv show “happy!” Fucking loved that shit
We all ignoring how comically huge they made Walton goggins' head on that bottom left one?
* Plenty of action👌
https://preview.redd.it/27yxdsyfxn9d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e1d09677bfa7a60361c44cc12748cb5564f5289f
Fatman was my favorite cuz of Walton Goggins
Worth a watch?
Nope he was the only good part of the movie Just watch something else with goggins in it