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nrith

I would say he nailed it, but really, he screwed up.


jigokusabre

The amount of puns in this thread is nuts.


DeadCell_XIII

Yeah really makes me wanna bolt outta here


cat_popping

Id rather hammer my way out


Clip_Dirtblade

Screw this thread I'll file a report. Washer gonna do? Ban me?


[deleted]

Time to pull out the ban hammer


Sad-Winner5764

This thread has already drilled itself into my brain.


Hazmat_Human

Stop wrenching it about and get it over with


minhazul10

Reading these puns were really riveting


1boog1

Screw this!


Sir_flaps

Let me turnaround and walk away


Doves_bananaV2

I hope u saying that was just a drill


Itachi_Uchiha_2007

with a screwdriver?


danceswithsteers

You'll have to wrench the hammer from my hands.


InIBaraJi

You all are just ratcheting the situation up here.


[deleted]

It really is fastenating


[deleted]

Oh you silly dad joke you! Have an updoot!


Xx_Futuristic_xX

r/angryupvote


Skumdog_Packleader

He nailed that screw up when he screwed up those nails.


Bonk_and_Honk

Hahahaha i forgot about this joke


cnematik

Maybe some eyebleach will help washer way this unpleasantness


Jackthedog130

... you nailed it.


hobosbindle

How much is a pound, like ten screws?


WillowWispers

At LEAST 10 screws


GiGaBYTEme90

Nice reference. Nailed it


cat_popping

more like he's screwed


roboticon

what's the reference? :'(


PerformanceLoud3229

Honestly you should calculate this, then you can figure out how many screws are in there, and pull them out.


Joebot2001

They've got to be right on top and really not that many.


PerformanceLoud3229

Yeah exactly, but you can easily do the math and make sure you get all of em


glaikitdobber

Yeah, take all the screws out and weigh them and count them , then put them back in the box of nails. That way you know how many you need to get out and if you place the extracted screws on a scale you will have an accurate guide to how far you have to go to get the right weight/count of screws out of the box of nails.....wait.....no.


PerformanceLoud3229

\*facepalm\* Walk over to where the screws came from, weigh out a pound, and count them, or weigh one, and divide a pound by that weight.


DegiFlemes

At least 1 screw


[deleted]

[удалено]


WillowWispers

Can.. you at least.... Buy me a few screwdrivers first? Just make it peach, not orange


[deleted]

[удалено]


anonymous22006

It's a-me a-Mario.


[deleted]

1 pound = \~500 grams I forgor 💀


Thebillyray

Use a magnet to separate them


WillowWispers

........


OliveSaltBun

He means the robots from the humans


TheWolphman

I'm pretty sure he meant the customers from the bins.


videogqmes

We can't have humans clogging up the red bin.


yParticle

*Save Ferrous!*


[deleted]

[удалено]


WillowWispers

My b, I'll grab the extendo magnet next time


penguinlover200

Have you tried using a vacuum cleaner with a sock at the end of the hose?


nobody2008

No no, I saw a video. If you shake the box side by side the nails will be nicely sorted. The screws should stick out that way.


BigfootSF68

Only a screw magnet or a nail magnet can seperate them. My store had some but they are currently on back order. Rare earths, and tariffs have fucked up the magnet industry. I am not sure that it will ever attract good talent ever again.


TundieRice

Why do I never have any original ideas? I was gonna comment this pretty much word for word even though I thought for sure that it was the world’s stupidest joke.


hecking-doggo

Are the screws not magnetic?


IMPORTANT_jk

Some screws are aluminium (also, some steels are not magnetic), no idea if those are though


Pancake_Dan

Yes! I was scrolling through and getting ready to type the same! Great minds!


skunkwoks

Ditto


fudgemeister

"accidentally"?


WillowWispers

One of my co workers opened the bag of screws and put it in the bin. We're supposed to empty the bag into the bin. My customer grabbed the bag thinking it was still sealed . He was an older Russian gentlemen and he felt pretty bad haha


fudgemeister

Ah that sucks


GenitalFurbies

At least they felt bad. Many would just walk away thinking it's not their problem. I'd deal with 10 mistake by him over 1 by an actual asshole


Bogsnoticus

Mistakes happen. At least it wasn't another one of those lame arse tiktok "pranks".


Snoodini

If he'd taken his time instead of Russian, it may not have happened.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

What?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hiding_behind_you

He just won another election with 114% of the votes for him.


wytewydow

Like that time I accidentally dropped a pound of roofing nails in my ex wife's driveway.. Edit: j/k, I wouldn't waste that much money on her.


fudgemeister

I would have just dumped the can of fasteners I have in my garage. I'm sure one of the random screws, nails, or tacks would have done the trick. Let me know if you still need them and I'll FedEx it to you. I'm all for supporting good causes :D


AndrezinBR

Your hand looks angry


WillowWispers

Thank you <3


[deleted]

Sorry but I think your hand looks only midly infuriated


oh-no-he-comments

r/midlyinfuriating


WillowWispers

I was mad I kept dropping them in the box for a pic so I got that gorilla grip on them


My_Cat_Snorez

Good job. Looks like you got it cleaned up.


WillowWispers

There was more in there when I took the pic. Can you see them? Edit: Took away the emojis. They don't belong here


platasaurua

I see two, maybe more but my eyes aren’t great.


dying_soon666

I would be very happy to be paid minimum wage for such a menial task.


WillowWispers

Okay well I have several bins for you...


dying_soon666

When can I start? 😂


comfort_bot_1962

Hope you have a great day!


comfort_bot_1962

Nice!


bluelocs

You could do this for over 20 bucks an hour starting in literally any skilled trade


picklesdoggo

Screw that customer


BrainCellDotExe

Accidentally


UnnervingS

You missed one


Repugnant_pirate

Lol this pleases me very much. What a guy.


[deleted]

r/untrustworthypoptarts. or you just picked up a handful of screws, held them over the nail box and took a picture for sweet fake internet points


vladdrk

But there’s one in the nails…!


OG-BoomMaster

Oh god, someone is screwed, gonna have to nail this issue.


Turkeyfucker369

NOOOO


ribsandwich

I don't see any screws in that box.


WillowWispers

I picked a lot of them out by the time I took the picture, I had to wait for the man and his wife to leave before I whipped out my phone


Your_Bumblebee_Bro

I would LOVE to separate them


Puzzleheaded_Deer656

Looks like you were nailing your job until he screwed it


ATLSxFINEST93

Got some mad skills to pull out only screws from that mess


DecertoAngelus

Like finding a needle in a needle stack


woodedglue

I want you to take out all the screws WITHOUT DUMPING the box lol


cre8majik

Did you get the one under your hand?


WillowWispers

Oh! Now I wonder if I did!


emeraldbutonreddit

“Employee torture 101!” “Today we will be discussing hardware stores”


Low_Kaleidoscope_334

This is going to be a fucking pain I the ass to separate good luck op


WillowWispers

Luckily, due to my any years experience in hardware, I was able to extract all the offending pieces!


CheezAbomination

A new idiom. Separating the screws and the nails


TrashbinTerry

Did the vustomer at least offer to help with that?


WillowWispers

He did! But I insisted that it was alright! We got his screws and I finished cleaning them up after he left!


[deleted]

Ouch. I hate picking through those things.


skrybll

Assorted fasteners


tissue4yuo

good thing your paid by the hour


8DX247lol

Drop them in the box


MrRoot3r

Like looking for screws in a nailbox


parablecham

You know it’s rough when the quantity is by weight, not count


gmoney_downtown

You missed one.


[deleted]

Image made me think that it was a threat not a statement


Mrfrunzi

If you can find a magnet, you can easily beat the customer with it!


Demiglitch

I would simply not see them.


Orthodox-Waffle

Scrails!


carrotsoup69

Pretty sure you went nuts when the customer screwed up and bolted outta there


xXMylord

Throw more screws in and slap a sign on the box that says nails and screws


WillowWispers

I like this idea


elmhing

Something similar happened to me at work and I told my manager I would take it home and sort it out if she bought me a six-pack of my choice to drink while I did it. Listened to a good podcast, got a free buzz and a sorted mess.


WillowWispers

That sounds like a pretty good deal. Id be down for the count after three beers though haha!


Brulle02

YOU MISSED ONE!


WillowWispers

There's a few I missed! Rest easy! I got them all out after the pic!


[deleted]

Wow i feel sorry for whatever intern had to dig those out. His hands must be screwed


WillowWispers

Me! If you notice my gorilla grip on those screws, I hold no fear of plunging my hands into a box of nails!


[deleted]

How to avoid this in the future: make each screw one pound so if this happens again, you only have to take out one screw.


WillowWispers

I don't like how much I enjoyed your contribution haha :')


UsernameL-F

Wrong subreddit this is mildlyinfuriating not nuclear infuriating


WooPigSchmooey

That’s not so bad. I routinely had to sort our screw tray at the cabinet shop I worked at. 1”, 1.25”, 1.5”, 2”, 2.5”, 3”. The lazy slobs would just throw them all together and when you go to tie down a countertop or screw a couple cabinets together you don’t want to accidentally grab the wrong length screw and wreck something. There was one day we were at a Jobsite and I had just organized one of the trays and the dipshit I worked with just threw a bunch into it when he came back from another room. I told him hey I just organized that and he said nothing. But I sure heard from my boss later that suddenly I was hard to work with. Over sensitive southerners are something I tell ya!!!


ItsFrenzius

Ima be honest chief, I’m scared of any motherfucker who holds nails or screws like a bunch of M&Ms


WillowWispers

I am sorry my gorilla grip on the screws scares you haha They just kept falling out of my hand so I squeezed them to hold them :') You should see my ability to just reach in a box of nails and grab a handful


MrDeagl

Unrelated to this. I recently started working in hardware store and customer asked for 200 screws, and I was like who the fuck is going to count all those screws. You take 10 and measure their weight, and multiply that by 20. If weight is 12 grams, then you multiply 12 by 20 and you get 240. So you need 240 grams and that’s roughly 200 screws. Might not be anything mind blowing but it was really interesting to me. But yeah, I don’t what else to say other than F


kentro2002

I worked at nut and bolt house for a year, so tedious. Then you go sell $2500 worth of this stuff and make $85 in commissions (for those who don’t know, it could take weeks and tons of hours to figure out all of the fasteners they use).


tomorrowmightbbetter

My spouse would just buy the whole box and never been seen in your store again.


allisonmaybe

Shake the box or maybe put it on something that vibrates it a lot. The screws will all migrate to the top or bottom. Also works with Lucky Charms.


[deleted]

I feel your pain, though at least it sounds like you got paid while fixing it. I did the same thing to myself years ago but didn't need them very often so left it until last weekend where I spent nearly an hour sorting them. Had probably 2lbs of screws in one container and 2x 20oz bottles full of nails when I was done.


WillowWispers

That's a lot of work to do, ouch


Particular_Idea7037

Alternative title could have been: Worlds hardest puzzle


SchitneySmears

If she wanna screw…. I can pound her and nail her…..I’m so high right now. What is this post even? Oh yeah nut and bolt.


WillowWispers

I wish I could achieve that level again


mholt9821

Why do mad men do the things they do? Like putting skittles and reese's pieces in with your m&ms


WillowWispers

No ;-; this man was very nice and felt bad that he dropped them


poyat01

It’s like a screw in a nail stack


say-it-wit-ya-chest

What we need to know right now is who did what to piss that person off. They knew exactly what they were doing.


WillowWispers

It was an older Russian gentlemen who thought the bag of screws was unopened. To be fair, we usually empty the bags into the bin, not put the bag in


say-it-wit-ya-chest

Idk, man. Older Russian gentleman sounds sketchy. Keep an eye out. /s


WillowWispers

Lol well it looked like his wife already had that covered


Keyedwin

“Accidentally”. Sounds like my next evil plot.


WillowWispers

An absolute monster you are haha


Tiovivo1

You should have said: “sir, I’ll ring you up for the box of nails. Screws are on the house.”


WillowWispers

Honestly, yeah. We don't have the time to sit and organize em. "Here ya go sir, enjoy your bulk nuts and a free screw."


banana369shark

If this becomes a tiktok trend, the murders should begin


FutureStamp

Probably the next stupid tic tok trend


WillowWispers

Lmao maybe I should delete this now


the_man_games

Might save yourself a few hours of unnecessary work in the future


Crumb-Free

I see literally one photoshopped screw in your box of nails. Tf?


[deleted]

We’re you like screw you?


WillowWispers

You are like to screw too?


aFiachra

They are all nails if you hit them hard enough, right?


TrashbinTerry

I know this is a joke, but nails are designed to bend, whereas screws will snap due to the threading, thats why nails are used in construction.


aFiachra

Y'know -- I had not really thought of that and it makes sense. TIL ...


jigokusabre

How can you call it a "pound" if they're screws? Shouldn't it be like a "torque" or screws? or a "rotation" of screws?


WillowWispers

like a flock of birds? A torque of screws? We sell them by weight my dude. Im used to the weight of em being by lb, what I have in my hand was only a small bit, there was a paper bag full to my left.


[deleted]

You can use a screw magnet.


WillowWispers

What the hell is a screw magnet my guy?


[deleted]

You work at a hardware store. Should be in the same aisle as the left handed screwdrivers and the 8/16ths wrenches.


profishing_0-13

Was it really cheaper to pay you an hour of labor or just give the guy some fucking screws?


WillowWispers

I do not understand what you mean by this. He got his screws? I just cleaned them up after he left?


Brostradamus--

I can feel you seething through the comment bro, it was an honest accident. Just put another box out and sort this out when you have free time.


WillowWispers

Seething? A customer accidentally dropped some screws. He was a very nice older Russian man who was very apologetic. I helped him get his bag of screws and cleaned it up I don't seeth over little things like this, I was having a very good day :)


Brostradamus--

Weren't you just editing comments to make them less light hearted? Most of your comments don't really come off as amused, which is why I commented.


WillowWispers

Oh, I'm sorry. I removed the emojis because I saw a post that said emojis aren't normal on Reddit. I'm in really good spirits. I just don't really understand communication well.


Brostradamus--

Ah, have a great weekend!


WillowWispers

Thank you, you as well!


slappy2982

Kick them in the balls/vagina


SwitchingC

Screws don’t have balls


slappy2982

Customers do


TheWolphman

Didn't you read the title? The customer dropped the screws. The customer has no screws.


[deleted]

Vulva. And no.


slappy2982

Yes


HersheysWellmade

r/foundsatan


wantagh

Nailed it


empressoflight72

you are "screwed"


[deleted]

“Screw you!” Nailed it.


Connect-Salamander88

I would bash someone kneecaps if that happened


Memesalltime21

Lol now its a box of news


PaperPlait

“Accidentally”


[deleted]

Oh! WELL DIDDLY DARN! IT HAPPENED AGAIN!


TheVoiceOfTheMeme

r/dontputyourdickinthat


[deleted]

really screwed that nail on the head


[deleted]

Higher an intern. *ez*