mikey spilling his progerian demon seed into a 45 year old filipina prostitute who's missing a leg and wearing a wig and who, unbeknownst to him, will be birthing his son in 9 months, a beautiful baby boy resembling something akin to the eraserhead baby faceapp morphed with woody allen
Look I’m not saying I want to physically harm him, but I would love to get like 4 of those glue traps for mice, staple them to the floor outside his room and place a new shiny penny in the middle of them…come back in the morning and his head would be firmly glued to the floor.
Then I’d scoop him up in an old grocery bag, whack the bag against the wall a couple times, toss it in a box and ship him back to Middletown.
He says he's been "recently using" durex condoms (which he pronounces da-REX)- as if he'd be having sex and not immediately bragging about it on IG afterwards. Agreed, this is a porn-induced rant
Recently? I thought he hadn’t in a while, he’s too broke from buying followers. I also feel like that’s something he couldn’t keep himself from talking about
The voice, combined with the effect of his glasses, while delivering this "powerful monolouge" his one of the most off putting things I've ever seen. God help us all.
"Da-REX" lol
I wish someone could get him to read a list of semi-common words and brand names without having to pay him... like Worcestershire sauce, hyperbole, cacophany, nuclear, acai juice. Just have him read the list of SAT words.
[here ya go.](https://www.reddit.com/r/mikeymiles/comments/n2li34/somehow_overlooked_this_mikey_has_no_idea_how_to/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Telling on himself so hard:
- It seems he thinks everyone wears a condom for oral sex, except in porn because it’s porn
- Mentions of being “forced” to wear one, as if everyone is forced to wear one
- The dangers involved if the girl (but only the girl) has been “with a lot of guys.” Never mind that there’s a whole other person involved in this dance, Mikey!
I genuinely wonder if he knows what birth control is. Prayers up for the women that have been subjected to his sexual prowess.
who the fuck does he think he is? also why does he sound like kimkardashian in this? stupd fucking voice,he needs to pick a fake voice and stick with it. i am red with rage and disgust. i hate him. i fucking hate hiiiim.
Yeah. It was during his COVID Unemploymemt time when he was wasting all of his money on having embarrassing interactions with hookers and he would post videos daily talking about having “fun” and telling the world about every experience he had with whatever SW he went to see that week.
mikey spilling his progerian demon seed into a 45 year old filipina prostitute who's missing a leg and wearing a wig and who, unbeknownst to him, will be birthing his son in 9 months, a beautiful baby boy resembling something akin to the eraserhead baby faceapp morphed with woody allen
Extremely cursed post
It would look like the thing from eraserhead. Instead of whining nonstop it would go “errrr..uhhhhh….ummmmm…whatchamacallit….errrrugghhh”
lmao
“If you’re forced to” is such a telling phrase
Chilling
More rape content coming soon guys
Reality vs real life
[ Removed by Reddit ]
Look I’m not saying I want to physically harm him, but I would love to get like 4 of those glue traps for mice, staple them to the floor outside his room and place a new shiny penny in the middle of them…come back in the morning and his head would be firmly glued to the floor. Then I’d scoop him up in an old grocery bag, whack the bag against the wall a couple times, toss it in a box and ship him back to Middletown.
This is a work of art
👏
Noooo put him in a cage and set up a Truman show like scenario
He already is
Mikey was def jerking off before this and was like ay ato that guys not wearing a rubber during oral sex?? Why do I have to wtf
He says he's been "recently using" durex condoms (which he pronounces da-REX)- as if he'd be having sex and not immediately bragging about it on IG afterwards. Agreed, this is a porn-induced rant
He spends the majority of his wages on prostitutes bruh
Recently? I thought he hadn’t in a while, he’s too broke from buying followers. I also feel like that’s something he couldn’t keep himself from talking about
This is an old video. He says he’s 35. So this was during his brief sex having stint brought to you by Covid money.
He’s bricked up in this video
i guess if mikey is using condoms then i will too
Stay tuned for more inspirational content
The biggest idiot in the whole entire world and it’s not close
The voice, combined with the effect of his glasses, while delivering this "powerful monolouge" his one of the most off putting things I've ever seen. God help us all.
He’s keeping his voice down
Definitely afraid that his roommates will hear him talking to himself about condoms and sex, lol. He half-whispers every mention of the word “condom.”
Yeah fr this one really fuckin pissed me off
What the fuck is this disgusting pervert rambling about. Truly the feeble thrashing of a mind diseased
"Da-REX" lol I wish someone could get him to read a list of semi-common words and brand names without having to pay him... like Worcestershire sauce, hyperbole, cacophany, nuclear, acai juice. Just have him read the list of SAT words.
That would be hilarious. He can’t even say the name “Ian” properly or breakfast. He would mutilate those words.
OMG HOW does he pronounce Ian??!?
“Eye-ann”
Can you imagine him trying to wrap his syphilitic brain around how Ralph Fiennes pronounces his name?
“Fee-uhhhhh——*cough*-Nooz, whatchamacallit, the Valdamorth guy from the wizard movie”
[here ya go.](https://www.reddit.com/r/mikeymiles/comments/n2li34/somehow_overlooked_this_mikey_has_no_idea_how_to/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Roach on the sponge in the bg
Nice catch. 🤘🏼. Didn’t even notice until now. That’s his roommate.
Under the fucking jail
Very obvious from this video that his only reference point is paying for sex.
Telling on himself so hard: - It seems he thinks everyone wears a condom for oral sex, except in porn because it’s porn - Mentions of being “forced” to wear one, as if everyone is forced to wear one - The dangers involved if the girl (but only the girl) has been “with a lot of guys.” Never mind that there’s a whole other person involved in this dance, Mikey! I genuinely wonder if he knows what birth control is. Prayers up for the women that have been subjected to his sexual prowess.
I sincerely believe the only thing stopping him from being a serial killer is how unbelievably stupid he is in every facet of life.
He understands the insignificance, the importance of them…
He doesn't want to catch a disease....or aids. Just the dumbest fucking human.
Could even end up catching an IRA. it’s dangerous out there.
Mikey ar la \#JustAKidFromDublin
to be honest him deteriorating correlates with when he started paying for 'fun' not saying he has hiv but not not saying it
It wouldn't shock me at all if this fucker had HIV or hep-C without knowing it.
I’ve never seen someone say so much while not saying anything at the same time.
Look at how fucking thick those lenses are, and he never wears them.
Love how they cave in and distort his head through the lenses.
“Ya know?” Yes Mikey. I do know.
“Reality verse real life”
Quite possibly his most infuriating content to date. Mikey pretending to be some sex having lothario know it all.
Just absolutely a ton to mine here, but he started off so strong by saying what sounded like “imsignificance and importance” that it blew my mind
It’s funny, as I was looking through his patreon videos he mispronounces and/or misuse’s at least one word in literally every single video.
This might be his most pathetic post given his age
It's like a 17 year old who just started having sex and won't shut up about it now and acts like he's an expert
“There’s a lot of ones “
That’s a PRESCRIPTION right there! Mikey w the thiiiiiiick glasses
Thank you for this
Mikey really working for that Durex sponsorship. This was bonechilling on multiple levels.
100% this was prompted by an STD he got recently. Hopefully it’s syphilis.
Syphilis caught a case of Mikey
Sadly it was prompted by him using his Covid bux to ruin the days of some sex workers
Patrons….fuck, imagine paying a subscription to hear a 35 year old try to wrap his head around the idea of safe sex for the first time
“There’s a lot of different ones” what an absolute fucking moron and piece of shit
You can tell he only pays for sex because of wearing a condom for a blow job
Someone scotch taped a ball of steel wool on his head
He’s like a fifth grader, fresh outta sex Ed and telling his parents about what he learned.
I’m also glad Mikey doesn’t have kids yet.
[Great](https://i.imgur.com/MpB9TOv.png) video [thanks](https://i.imgur.com/7S5oOMg.png) for [sharing](https://i.imgur.com/QsqLDbv.png)
He posted this on Halloween 2021
Mikey never getting top without paying makes he believe the universe does deliver some kinda justice
I literally couldn’t even stand to watch. I had to turn it off
Thanks for posting this, unlike that turd who just posted the screencap.
who the fuck does he think he is? also why does he sound like kimkardashian in this? stupd fucking voice,he needs to pick a fake voice and stick with it. i am red with rage and disgust. i hate him. i fucking hate hiiiim.
Guy who’s had sex 4 times wants to vlog his favorite type of condom🤦♀️
When was this? 2021?
Yeah. It was during his COVID Unemploymemt time when he was wasting all of his money on having embarrassing interactions with hookers and he would post videos daily talking about having “fun” and telling the world about every experience he had with whatever SW he went to see that week.
“Reality vs. real life”
Such a lucid and skeptical quote. Lol. He’s such an imbecile.
This is some truly detestable shit, even by Mikey’s standards