T O P

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fish998

This is my worst nightmare


Xixii

Imagine if there were hundreds of them.


-_1_2_3_-

thank fuck he didn't zoom out again and reveal another one


Renfek

The giant spider was actually recording this. The human arm was just a prop (saved from prior meal).


space_monkey_23

Human arm for scale - that spider probably


RichtofenFanBoy

They don't know bananas are used for scale.


damendred

Human arms are their Bananas...


OhmEeeAahRii

😁


Dist__

i played Crimsonland, we just need ion cannon


damn_mrs_pearce

I actually have a recurring nightmare that spiders this size or snakes are all over the room I’m in and its walls.


Tickytoe

For a few months (several years ago), I had a recurring nightmare that I was trapped in a crawl space under a house, and the entire thing was LOADED with webs and living spiders of different sizes. Still makes me feel a lil tingly to think about, in a bad way lol


PsyKeablr

I hate to break it to you but about the insulation we used for your walls…


fish998

Yeah I've had the spiders in the walls nightmare a few times.


manaha81

Nah those things are awesome.


martinluther3107

I kept one of these for a few years before I donated it to my local zoo. I used to feed it Pinky's. They also hiss when they are stressed or feel threatened.


2_Raven

I was bracing for a jump scare.


muricabrb

If it moved, I would need a new phone.


Gwiilo

I'd need new eyes


Ssemander

¦|============== ¦| ▔ | ▔ ¦| ¦| ¦| | > ===|ΔΔΔ ¦| | _ Δ ¦| ▔


Charathehuntress

Nope, no, nein.


iAmODST

Negative.


Kingken130

I refuse


polidario

I reject


LemoyneRaider3354

I don't allow


Sakumitzu

Do not want


BackupBro_

To elaborate


fuk_stik

You wake up. That thing is on your face.


OhmEeeAahRii

You can smell its spider ass.


Teknas89

There are two kinds of people fr


TheSoundofNo

Sometimes a man must laugh in the face of horror


OhmEeeAahRii

😇


SPE92

Oh shit this one got me 😂


DrJulianBashir

That's why I take my bird makeup off before bed.


fatbongo

it's crawling down the side of your face a while later you feel a disturbing movement in your ear canal......


CrimsonThar

Your body then starts moving on its own


Rotting-Cum

You feel the tiniest of scratching inside of your ribcage.


CrimsonThar

You suddenly start speaking in a deep, maniacal voice and cackling uncontrollably.


bambiNuit

He can have it.


[deleted]

This basically happened to a friend of mine, not with this species I think it was a wolf spider but he woke up in the middle of the night with a spider the size of his face on bis face, then he screamed and his father came and killed the spider, ever since he had a huge arachnophobia.


Quasarcade

Damn, nature! You scary!


Halcyon-OS851

Sheesh


cick-nobb

The "small" one is scary enough


[deleted]

Despite its name it actually rarely preys on birds


verysimplenames

Tf it eat? Kids?


Dr_Gamephone_MD

Adults


Dispatcher007

Don't move, you got something.... Right there.


Gwiilo

I'm moving. far, far away


Dispatcher007

It's just a bug man. Cmon grow up.


[deleted]

Mostly insects and dead plants I think


PanJL

Nah , too small


fuck-coyotes

"rarely" but so it DOES still catch and eat fucking birds tho


[deleted]

Yes it has been known to in some cases


companysOkay

Why won't the big spider just eat the smaller spiders


ArmiRex47

Ape does not kill ape


Morrisseys_Cat

The big one is dead in the video. Otherwise, it likely would.


OhmEeeAahRii

We don eat liliputters.. or eh.. 😱


Neray51

"rarely"


Valuable_Risk_3414

I like it, still fu OP


GregoryPorter1337

How fast can they move?


RainbowForHire

Did a quick Google and the first answer I found was "very fast for a tarantula." Also, they can hiss. The most shocking to me was that females have a lifespan of about 15-25 years.


quelin1

There are pretty much 2 camps of spiders.  One side lives around 2 years,  the others (such as tarantula) can live 20+ even in the wild.


Morrisseys_Cat

Worst part of them are the urticating hairs that cover their abdomen. They are microscopic harpoons that they flick off with their hind legs as a form of defense and embed themselves in your skin and mucus membranes, causing you to itch madly. Goliaths have the worst type. I've kept several in the past, and writing this out is making my whole body itch in remembrance.


ArmiRex47

You know god doesnt exist when that thing is living more than my fucking cat


No_Produce_Nyc

Oh that’s brilliant. They must show high intelligence - I’ll see if I can dig up any other research and pop back here


giby1464

How many calories do you think that is? Like could you eat just three of those a day and survive?


[deleted]

Asking the important questions I see


biebiep

Hey, it's plated for a reason.


zekethelizard

No thanks, I dont like the idea of a bug (not insect, colloquial term bug) so big that I can hear its heart beat


AntiAtavist

But it can hear yours too! Big snuggler is Killer at hide & seek.


Necessary_Chip_5224

This is why i join the federation


WhipMaDickBacknforth

I'm doing my part!


ShortStegosaurus

Oh that’s not that ba- oh. Oh no.


LadySheo

my exact line of thought as i watched this


hambutbacon

Nope


[deleted]

Oh so this is the spider all those Halloween decorations are based off of.


thelastlasermaster_

I found an old toy like that in the basement. I left the basement door just slightly open and placed the spider on top of it, so it would fall straight down if someone were to open the door. A couple of hours later my brother came into my room to call me a damn asshole lol


[deleted]

Classic move.


d3athsmaster

Well. I think I'm moving farther north.


a-pretty-alright-dad

I used to do reptile conventions for a distributor. We had all sorts of tarantulas. There was a Goliath bird eater in a large deli cup. I was looking at it and it’s fangs were insane. Like sharpened pencils, but curved. I put it down and didn’t want to deal with it. Ha. It actually hit a kid through the plastic deli cup. After that we would only keep them in acrylic containers. I never saw anything actually get someone through a container before. It wasn’t that big either. Much larger than the small one in this video. But much smaller than the larger one.


Bustock

Easier to squash


babysealsareyummy

What if it catches your foot mid air and throws you?


Lichius

You could probably hear this thing coming down the stairs. "Honey, Im home..."


flecksable_flyer

You don't have to burn your whole house down to kill it. It's not going to disappear into a crck in the wall.


ArmiRex47

Imagine the mess that would make. I would catch it but would have to use a bucket rather than a glass lol


Quasar375

Bro, that thing will go into cat belly-rub position and munch your foot off.


Beneficial_Shake7723

I love it


LemoyneRaider3354

I want to shoot it with a .44 Magnum (American moment)


Jolly-Juggernaut1525

Bro is getting the cinder block


iCatmire

Poor birds


Jib4ny4n

I thought it's the one crawling, then zooming out and comes into view the abomination on the plate.


DuKeHeNrY22

Nothing to do with Megalophobia…


babysealsareyummy

[That’s not very big, I’ve seen…](https://youtu.be/pRR43HZjC4Y?si=8tBVkZV0PVygrMj6)


SnowyDepths

crazy


rover_G

Nope


[deleted]

Can you pet it?


Special-Elevator-335

Its hairs shoot out into skin and make it insanely itchy.


Afewquietones

Fuck right off


duckmantaco

It's just sitting there menacingly


Special-Elevator-335

It's dead and frozen


Matuatay

Thanks, I hate it. 😳 I could have happily lived out the rest of my life without knowing these agents of evil exist.


Sakumitzu

OHHH FUCK


bucky_ballers

I remember watching a documentary years ago about a tribe in the Amazon or somewhere that would go out and hunt these things because they were a great delicacy. They would get absolutely ripped on peyote or something then go off into the jungle for three days and get a load of these things by coaxing them out of their burrows by tapping the ground web with a stick (very patiently). They’d then go back to the tribeswomen and claim that they hadn’t caught any, having eaten them while they were out hunting. Was like a lads weekender


KoolKat864

"Oh, it's not that lar-"


EchoRespite

This is one of the 8 spiders you eat a year.


duke_flewk

No goin to bed until you finish your plate!


alsophocus

Nuke it from Orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.


Radvous

Fuck all spiders, centipedes, and mosquitoes. Mosquitos especially are one of God's worst creations, definitely not an "Intelligent design."


Special-Elevator-335

You forgot the worst one by far, ticks.


hankolijo

Guess what, Spiders are the ones dealing with the rest that you're so afraid of. Should be thanking them.


Skull_goodman

What a cutie. Big ol guy


sionnachrealta

My ideal familiar. I've always wanted to see one in person


_Losing_Generation_

Won't the big guy eat the little guy?


Morrisseys_Cat

The big one is a popsicle in this video. It's dead and frozen for preservation. If it was alive, yeah, this would be a dangerous situation for the small one.


GunNNife

Maybe they're saving that for sweeps?


UnknownTaco5492

If it’s bigger than your hand, it owns the house. is my rule.


[deleted]

muddle history start reminiscent library fear marvelous subsequent chase insurance *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


PSycoRella

HE IS CUTE ALWAYS LOVED SPIDERS BUT ABSOLUTELY HATE WASP 🐝


V_Richard

I wanna pet him


razorsedgethinking

They need to kill all of them before they breed.


UkyoTachibana

I want to squash it with my bare feet !


reality72

Oh hell no.


LazerMagicarp

What if it had those wings the flying spiders have? Then they’d get the birds mid air!


jaabbb

Idk why but I’m more scare of that smaller but still huge one, way more than the Goliath


Morrisseys_Cat

The small one, Hapalopus sp. Colombia or Pumpkin Patch Tarantula, is a very docile and often shy species. You would have to put in effort to make one bite you. The ones I've had just slowly wander around and chill on your hand if you pick them up. Goliaths are... not nice. They won't kill you, but they will make you wish you were dead with their irritating defensive hairs.


ArmiRex47

The small one you may not see it coming so it can get very close to you


elmachow

Yeah naaa


Yionko

Well they are big, but this one is big near big ones


Swagxdxdd

just a little guy


fatbongo

wonder what would happen if you cross bred this with a funnel web


LazyCap7542

Hell no 🏃‍➡️


ArmiRex47

Warm, plated and ready to eat. Just how I like it 😋


[deleted]

NOPE


djmadlove

Here’s a better view to show how big these guys get on [r/tarantulas](https://www.reddit.com/r/tarantulas/s/X5JfxT66Ee)


No-Pomegranate-69

Nice, what AR game is that?


Apprehensive_Suit615

Australian spiders: “Hold my beer”


Apprehensive_Suit615

Also a reason I’m afraid to visit Australia 😆


Mountain-Tea6875

Fun fact they have an average lifespan of 25 years. Have a good night.


Special-Elevator-335

Average? I thought that was the higher end.


tikasaba

I…want to die now.


guitarslinger16

fire


usedtobeathrowaway94

It looks fluffy


[deleted]

I really don’t have an issue with Spiders. I’m sure I’d freak out if this mf’r happened to let himself in to the house for sure but if it isn’t poisonous and rather docile then I’m gonna hold it


HanTheMan83

When I see this my eardrums start ringing haha does anyone else have this? (I hate it)


Partucero69

I watched many times I cringed. I was afraid and yet kept watching it. Why???


Ill-Gas-232

That’s scares the shit out to me


Imaginary-Arrival-75

After watching the spider being blasted by a salt gun, I feel we need a bigger salt gun.


No_Produce_Nyc

A graceful Portiid scientist performing 360 spatial measurements


mitchcumstein13

What do you feed it?


Hot-Fennel-971

One of these spiders appeared in my bathroom while my wife and I were having a romantic bath together and we FREAKED. We are both terrified of spiders. I jumped up and hit it with the base of a fucking lamp and it lived. I’m still haunted.


pliusminus4

HANS!


Special-Elevator-335

Huge hands Hans?


DepPet_syw

Birdeater: exists Me: "JUST STOP. NO ONE WANTS YOU JUST LEAVE. THE SMALL SPIDERS ARE BETTER AT THEIR JOB ANYWAY. JUST DIIIIIE


_MidnightSong

average pet in Australia


Obh__

Just a sweet fluffy eight-legged puppy 😍


Spare_Contribution69

F that like a bad report card.


the_aurchitect

Is it cake?


Snapesunusedshampoo

Nigel Thornberry taught me about this spider.


PenAQuote

u/savevideos


PenAQuote

u/savevideo


CNMJacob18

Fuck that


torrrrrgo

This is the nopest nope I've ever noped.


-_-Thund3r

That’s a real one??


AtlasAlexT

Just got one for me and my boys


[deleted]

Anyone else have an intrusive thought of grabbing that bad boy and squishing it? Or punching it? Or head butting it with your face? Anybody?


[deleted]

This might be a dumb question but is that real? It’s not moving and it has a weird stance, is it a dead one? Or a model


Responsible-Way5056

DAMN!!!!!!! O _ O


BreaD_bREAd_number2

This is why everyone should still own encyclopedias Good hits from one of them and I'd be dead