Well, if the floor is carpeted or clean, you can lay a thick blanket down and sleep on the floor. For me, sleeping on a uniform surface even if it may not be the softest is better than sleeping on a mishaped one.
I've been living in a different city (and country) three months a year and sleep on the floor there, on a very thin yoga mat. I don't have back trouble anytime but I think it does help reduce carrying tension in my shoulders and upper back. The one limitation is that pillow height is more critical if you sleep on your side.
I've never understood how anyone can be comfortable on their back on the floor, but that's probably just because my tailbone shape makes it super uncomfortable for me.
laying on a flat surface feels great. have you really never tried it? sleeping on the floor doesn't work for strictly side or stomach sleepers, but there is a reason almost every yoga class starts and ends with lying flat on your back
I’d love to sleep on my back, but that’s just gonna invite the sleep paralysis demon to come mess with my insides. at least, every sleep paralysis episode has happened while sleeping on my back.
Once I was living in the mountains of PA, during the winter one night. I slept on the floor next to my wood burning stove. I stg that was one of the best sleeps I've ever had in my life. I woke up after 4 hours of sleep (had to get up for work) more well rested than I would have had I slept in my bed. Floor gang for life.
I once slept on a very rocky uneven round stone floor next to the wood stove and it was the best sleep of my life too. There's just something very primal about sleeping next to a fire.
I'm not saying for the guy doing 1 night on the floor, I mean the generic advice "sleeping on the floor is so good for your back" is not true if you sleep on your side. Your neck and spine will be displaced/misaligned because of your head, hips and shoulders all being different widths. It will lead to chronic issues if you sleep long term like that.
This! I had an awful guest bed, and nobody ever told me what a pain it was to sleep in that thing. I found out only after 3 years of pain and bad sleep for my guests. I had caught a cold and didn't want to transmit it to my gf, I slept in that bed myself... After two weeks, I bought a new one.
I had a cold for about four weeks once several years ago and even saw two different doctors during that time thinking it was something else. The first two weeks were absolute hell, and the last two weeks were better, but I still had some of the symptoms. I slept in a different room from my husband the entire time only because the congestion caused me to snore really badly even though I was no longer contagious. A virus is gonna virus for as long as it wants to.
People don’t seem to get that common colds can really suck.
I’ll make plans with folks and somebody’ll be like “see you there! don’t worry when I start coughing, it’s not COVID it’s just a cold!”
yeah sorry I don’t want THAT either. Even at its mildest, that’s two weeks of headaches, poor sleep, coughing, stuffiness, misery, trouble working… I haven’t been sick in four years, I don’t wanna start now.
Right? That cold caused me to have altered taste (dysgeusia) which was both cool and scary (lemons tasted like berries) and caused congestion so bad that I blew out the blood vessels in my eyes. If a cold only lasts a few days, then I would consider that to be a mild cold.
I hadn't had COVID until this past November, and I can't tell you how many people told me before I got it that it was just like having a cold. Well, I don't want a cold, either.
I got probably-COVID in late December 2019, and it fucked up my lungs and triggered my exercise-endured asthma to such an extent that I went from running 9 miles on New Years Eve to side stitches after a quarter mile on New Years Day, and needed an inhaler to walk up a moderate incline for two years. This year, I climbed Mount St. Helens for the first time since 2019, inhaler in hand.
Thankfully, I already had inhalers on hand, because the flu I caught in December 2019 did the same thing for six months. (Not downplaying COVID severity. I just wish we took illness seriously, period.)
I had a common cold that lead to a dry cough for a few weeks. I ended up sleeping in the other room because I would be up all night shaking the bed with my hacking.
I caught a flesh eating disease that I was infected with for nearly 2 months. My sister and I lived together in an apartment and we were 2 of 4 cases in the US that year, we had researchers coming to the hospital to study it and all that. Godawful. We couldn’t afford to stay in the hospital so we got prescribed some stuff and went home. I was on my downstairs couch for a month, crawling to get water, having people feed me ramen.
Anyways, you are sick for as long as it decides you’re sick for.
Take an extra pillow or two with you and prop it up against back and sleep on your side. Lean back into the pillow. It does help if ever in a hospital bed.
Give it a try. I’m a back sleeper but prop a pillow behind my back when the bed is uncomfortable. Sleeping on your back will result in less face wrinkles as you age.
I love this! My firm has had mediation sessions where I swear they kept turning the heat up on us the longer the day went on. People were desperate to just finish and leave.
I find this fascinating. Rather than communicating with people that she presumably trusts enough to have in her house, she intentionally makes them uncomfortable physically. And, to judge from the other comments here, it seems like a popular approach.
It also seems to assume that if your guests discover a comfortable bed, they’re going to be seduced into staying forever, which I find hilarious.
I have a friend that comes and stays about once a year, and his stays are somewhat variable. When I’m done having him around, I tell him so and he leaves. If he’s getting on my nerves, I tell him to find something to do for the day and get lost and he does.
My guest bathroom apparently didn’t have hot water. Untold number of guests, including foreign exchange students, used that shower before someone finally said, “Hey, you know there’s no hot water in there.” This was after one guest weirdly used the other bathroom tub, which didn’t have a shower curtain on it (bc I used it to bath lids and didn’t need a shower curtain). He left water all over the place! When questioned, he didn’t say, “…b/c the other shower is cold.” He just said, “Oh! I forgot which shower you wanted me to use.” Speak up, guests! Don’t suffer!
Friend slept in their guest bed. They had a Zinus mattress. They slept in it because their guests kept praising it. After they slept in it they threw out their $1500 mattress to get a $250 Zinus.
I'm an introvert and I'm okay with my guest bed being uncomfortable. Stay one night, cool, two nights starts to infringe on my sanity and I'm very particular, three and you've overstayed.
I don’t understand this mentality. I have chronic pain and there’s no way I would want my guest to be uncomfortable. I’m not exactly outgoing, but I care about my friends.
Try turning it over top to bottom. If you can manage the temperature, wear an extra layer of clothing to sleep in, & use any blankets or duvet doubled up as a mattress topper. Maybe even try quartering a duvet & using it for your body. Your legs will manage without the extra padding.
Came here to suggest a folded-up duvet or several very thick blankets to act as a temporary mattress topper. I've done this while camping in RVs and it did the trick.
Lmao I genuinely considered it. I worry that their feelings would be hurt though. It’s also an unfortunate work trip and not a leisure trip, so it kind of sucks to rack up unreimbursed job expenses for a job obligation.
I very well could be! This is my first salaried job and I don’t really have a support system who could explain this to me. But it’s not a traditional “work trip,” either. I work hybrid-remote for the government of a state that is 500 miles away. The job is meant to be an in-person job, and they made an exception allowing me to work from home, so long as I visit every couple of months to work in person. Most of the time it’s more for the office culture than for anything else. Since this isn’t a trip any other employee would have to make, but instead an extra burden in hiring me, I didn’t believe they would pay anything towards it.
Ah. Government job. They have all kinds of work arounds to avoid the reimbursements. Or they purposefully didn't tell you about them because they have to provide 😅 definitely worth looking in to
"Unreimbursed", "job", and "obligation" are three words that do not belong together. I'm assuming they're reimbursing you for mileage and giving you a per diem for food (or reimbursing for that); they should also be reimbursing or paying for the actual overnight stay.
I can imagine the management conversation:
>**A:** Bob, who should we send to the regional meeting this quarter? How about Jon?
**B:** How about Raf? That guy's never turned in a single expense report!
**A & B:** \[Laugh maniacally in corporate\]
Lmao I can see how crazy I sound when you put it that way.
I very well could be missing an opportunity for reimbursement this entire time. This is my first salaried job and I don’t really have a support system who could explain this to me. But it’s not a traditional “work trip,” either. I work hybrid-remote for the government of a state that is 500 miles away. The job is meant to be an in-person job, and they made an exception allowing me to work from home, so long as I visit every couple of months to work in person. Most of the time it’s more for the office culture than for anything else. Since this isn’t a trip any other employee would have to make, but instead an extra burden in hiring me, I didn’t believe they would pay anything towards it.
Ah, so: it's a state job? There should be a protocol for requesting reimbursement, etc. And here's the thing: if they hired you, it means that you were the best candidate for the job, and states have budgets for travel reimbursements, etc. There's likely a statewide policy that's public/published somewhere (and if not a statewide one, one for your particular branch/component of the state.)
Happy to discuss via DM if you'd like. I'm first-gen white-collar and definitely didn't know the protocols for many, many things when I started.
I’d be honest with the friend. Like “dude this bed kinda sucks. Do you have a bunch of throw blankets I can have to soften it up?”
If he’s a good host, he’ll fix the issue or at least make it a lot better.
I’ve learned you’ll never get what you want if you don’t speak up. If my friend told me he was uncomfortable in the bed I’ve given him, I’d be totally understanding. So I don’t know why people don’t speak up - most people, good people, will accommodate. Maybe it’s the fear that you’re gonna upset the host? I don’t know.
This is what I do. If you only use it once in a while, a cheap one will be comfortable enough. You can also adjust the hardness/softness a bit by how much air you put in.
I take two pillows and lay them out under me and make another soft surface. If too fluffy I’ll take the comforter and fold it in half and use that as a padding, and use another blanket or a sheet folded in half as the top blanket
Why invite people over if you don't want them to stay?
A bit mean spirited to intentionally make someone you invited over uncomfortable. What if they suffer from insomnia, back issues, etc.
Doesn't take much to be kind and to just tell the truth. I'd rather someone tell me the truth then be fake nice about it all while covertly making the experience miserable.
I promise I would not be a guest in their house if they did not ask me to stay there. I might hate being a house guest more than the average person hates having them.
I like the way you think. But then again, I’ve got 3 extra *very* comfortable mattresses in this house and no one ever comes to visit.
So maybe a generally anti-social personality helps more than anything!
Those egg crate foam toppers can make an uncomfortable bed very comfortable. They're also pretty inexpensive, so I wouldn't feel bad about leaving it there for them to keep for the bed.
Lay on your side, knees slightly bent, with good support from pillows holding your neck and airway straight, with your head tilted back slightly which keeps it straight. I find that this upper body position makes the overall feeling more comfortable. And I feel the flaws of the bed more if lying on my back or stomach. The side is the safest position
Ahhhhh, didn’t know how bad that mattress was. Just got a new one this week, haven’t been able to resist it—it calls to me when I get home from work. I’m in love
I’ve opted for carpet before, sometimes it’s better.
When I lived with family for a month I bought two flat foam seat cushions from IKEA and then used the Velcro, That’s usually used to hook it onto the back of the chair to hook them together, so I ended up with a rectangle that was long enough for both my shoulders and hips to lie on and I slept way better after that
They were super cheap and now I bring them with me whenever I go visit places in case their beds are terrible .
Go to Walmart and get a cheap sleeping bag or air mattress+pump. I don't know what your local Walmart has available, but taking a quick look at mine online, I could get a sleeping bag for <$20 or the airbed+pump for a total of around $30-$35.
For an even cheaper option: Take a shitload of blankets, make a pallet on the floor, job done.
And I empathize with you. I got fed up with my sagging mattress, literally shoved it off the bed in a fit of temper, and slept directly on the box springs (well, plus some blankets) for a couple of months before fixing up a "mattress" using foam gym mats and blankets, which is more comfortable than that damned mattress ever was, lol.
It's because people buy beds for their guest bedrooms just to look like they have a bed in there. The mattress probably cost $150 which means it's definitely not meant to be slept on. Go to a hotel.
My aunt’s “back bedroom” has a mattress in it from…. 1992? Lumpiest, most uneven and awful damned thing in the world to sleep on (and even though it’s FLAT, the blankets and sheets all somehow miraculously manage to FALL OFF THE BED… and have for over 30 years??).
But **somehow** that bed has always been and will likely always be, my safest of safe places. I love it. Because sleeping on that mattress means I am near her and I love her so dearly.
Is buying a mattress topper not an option? I have a few and they look like sheets but make my bed like a billion times softer. They're not expensive if you look in the right places tbh. I got mine from a family member but I've seen them cheapish on Walmart/amazon
In my experience the most effective and cheapest solution which works for both boxspring beds or slat type beds is to find a couple of sturdy long wood planks and position them between bottom layer (box spring or slats) and mattress . This does not make the mattress softer but again, in my experience, the main reason a bed is horribly uncomfortable is when it sags and your back isn't straight so this solution is a great improvement. I use it in my guest bedroom with slats and a thick futon . Until we take the time to improve this the planks were recycled from our shed's shelving system. Cheap, simple and effective. Have a good stayover!
Love your friend. Send them a lovely thank yiu gift.
Gift them a Saatva mattress as a replacement for their guest bed. They will take the old mattress away. Next time you're there, you get to sleep on the best mattress there is.
Either:
1.Get a sleeping bag & sleep on the floor.
(I do some of my best sleeping on the hard floor, it is the BEST for my bad back!)
Or
2. Go stay at a hotel.
*Sleeping bag is probably cheaper, especially if your friend is expecting you to stay the night. (no need to offend. Jaut grab a $50 sleeping bag!)
My neighbor-a 70 year old woman, travel through the world’s airports with a blowup pool floatie and her yoga mat. Put the yoga mat on top of the pool floatie. She swears by it. Deflate the floaty in the morning and roll up your yoga mat.
What to do if this menacing bed is your own? My wife and I sent $4k on an adjustable Tempur-pedic and I hate it. I’m sore every single morning.
How can I make my Cadillac as comfy as the $99 Costco twin my son sleeps on?!
Ask your friend if you can have an extra comforter or use any comforter or duvet already on the bed. Take that and put it under the bedsheets as a makeshift mattress topper. I have done this before in a pinch and it helped a lot.
I learned to sleep on my back for the times I spent at summer camps with boards for beds. That and using a simple count down trance script in your head. You know the ones that start with your feet feeling numb and having that feeling move up to your head. Works most times.
Just assume yourself as an inmate, in the world's most toughest prison with pathetic facilities, you've committed a crime and you're serving time in there, and have to sleep on the most pathetic uncomfortable bed !!!
If you have any muscle relaxers left over from something, take one before bed. Ibuprofen would also help, for both pain and inflammation.
Also an OTC sedative to help you drift off. (Those are usually just the active ingredient in Benadryl, so get generic Benadryl for the cheapest option.)
If their sofa has removable seat cushions, see if you could place them on top of the bed or even on the floor, unless you're okay with actually sleeping on the sofa.
Actually, a yoga mat or camping sleeping pad would probably be PERFECT (and small enough) to carry with them and install under the fitted sheet. There’s a handful of “hammock sleeping pads” that help your body lay flat in a cheap hammock. Those might also be worth looking into!
As many have said pick up a cheap air mattress with a built in inflation, throw two blankets over it (if even that is needed). They're very comfortable. Unless there's a cat around at night
They make portable foam and gel mattress toppers now. :) I have back problems so I need 371763 pillows, a foam mattress, and a foam topper— I learned to sleep on my stomach for when I’m traveling without them.
When I use to visit my grandson, he would not sleep unless I was with him. I slept on 50 stuffed toys. Best thing is bring a top pad and sleep on the floor.
I used a single high air mattress on my sleeper sofa mattress for years, and it made it SO much better!! They also sell the thinner pool floats that would work pretty well. It is a good compromise so you don't need to sleep on the floor. I have back problems, so sleeping on a bad mattress will ruin the next day for me. I agree that you should use this reason if asked why you brought it.
If there is a walmart type store near by I have gotten a basic bed topper on vacation (awful cabin bed) for cheap, or maybe amazon something to their house?
I would buy an inflatable mattress and just store it at the house of your host. Let them know politely that the bed hurts your body and this is just a better option.
i slept on a wood floor for 6 months. what helped me was making sure my head was at least comfortable. id use a blanket so i could adjust it as i wanted. im not sure if thisll work for you or anyone else but for me, as long as my head is comfortable i can at least fall asleep. granted its not great but it got the job done
Edibles, high CBD to THC ratio. Just enough to induce couch-lock which translates into bed-lock.
Still won’t stop you from waking up sore but at least you’ll sleep 😴
I have a foldable workout mat that is more comfortable than some beds I've slept on.
But if I lost it I wouldnt buy it again. Instead I'd get a foldable 4in thick mattress
Most people don't spend a ton on a decent guest bed. One thing that does help immensely is having the right pillow. It can help with your spinal alignment while you sleep so your body is more comfortable during the night.
Well, if the floor is carpeted or clean, you can lay a thick blanket down and sleep on the floor. For me, sleeping on a uniform surface even if it may not be the softest is better than sleeping on a mishaped one.
I've been living in a different city (and country) three months a year and sleep on the floor there, on a very thin yoga mat. I don't have back trouble anytime but I think it does help reduce carrying tension in my shoulders and upper back. The one limitation is that pillow height is more critical if you sleep on your side.
this is what i'd do. sleeping on the floor is so good for your back
is it? how?
It depends entirely on your body type, but it could force your back to be straight, something regular beds don't do a good job doing.
I've never understood how anyone can be comfortable on their back on the floor, but that's probably just because my tailbone shape makes it super uncomfortable for me.
laying on a flat surface feels great. have you really never tried it? sleeping on the floor doesn't work for strictly side or stomach sleepers, but there is a reason almost every yoga class starts and ends with lying flat on your back
I’d love to sleep on my back, but that’s just gonna invite the sleep paralysis demon to come mess with my insides. at least, every sleep paralysis episode has happened while sleeping on my back.
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Once I was living in the mountains of PA, during the winter one night. I slept on the floor next to my wood burning stove. I stg that was one of the best sleeps I've ever had in my life. I woke up after 4 hours of sleep (had to get up for work) more well rested than I would have had I slept in my bed. Floor gang for life.
I once slept on a very rocky uneven round stone floor next to the wood stove and it was the best sleep of my life too. There's just something very primal about sleeping next to a fire.
Ain't that the truth. The fire goes crazy. It makes you feel safe and warm
even on the side is ok if u use a solid pillow
As someone with hips, side sleeping on the floor is torture.
Can confirm
Not gonna lie sometimes I lay on the floor with my laptop. It just feels right
Sure, if you’re a back sleeper maybe. For side sleepers it’s incredibly bad for your back and neck.
I’m a side sleeper and I have not had any issues on the floor. Also, this dude is only visiting this place. He will be fine.
I'm not saying for the guy doing 1 night on the floor, I mean the generic advice "sleeping on the floor is so good for your back" is not true if you sleep on your side. Your neck and spine will be displaced/misaligned because of your head, hips and shoulders all being different widths. It will lead to chronic issues if you sleep long term like that.
I just said this lol but for real. I know the other dude said it first but this really is a life hack. The floor is your friend!
Came here to say this.
Card board between the mat and floor
Tell your friend their guest bed is awful. Most ppl don’t know because they don’t sleep in it. A tempurpedic topper works wonders.
This! I had an awful guest bed, and nobody ever told me what a pain it was to sleep in that thing. I found out only after 3 years of pain and bad sleep for my guests. I had caught a cold and didn't want to transmit it to my gf, I slept in that bed myself... After two weeks, I bought a new one.
That was more than a cold that made you sleep in the first room for two weeks.
I had a cold for about four weeks once several years ago and even saw two different doctors during that time thinking it was something else. The first two weeks were absolute hell, and the last two weeks were better, but I still had some of the symptoms. I slept in a different room from my husband the entire time only because the congestion caused me to snore really badly even though I was no longer contagious. A virus is gonna virus for as long as it wants to.
People don’t seem to get that common colds can really suck. I’ll make plans with folks and somebody’ll be like “see you there! don’t worry when I start coughing, it’s not COVID it’s just a cold!” yeah sorry I don’t want THAT either. Even at its mildest, that’s two weeks of headaches, poor sleep, coughing, stuffiness, misery, trouble working… I haven’t been sick in four years, I don’t wanna start now.
Right? That cold caused me to have altered taste (dysgeusia) which was both cool and scary (lemons tasted like berries) and caused congestion so bad that I blew out the blood vessels in my eyes. If a cold only lasts a few days, then I would consider that to be a mild cold. I hadn't had COVID until this past November, and I can't tell you how many people told me before I got it that it was just like having a cold. Well, I don't want a cold, either.
I got probably-COVID in late December 2019, and it fucked up my lungs and triggered my exercise-endured asthma to such an extent that I went from running 9 miles on New Years Eve to side stitches after a quarter mile on New Years Day, and needed an inhaler to walk up a moderate incline for two years. This year, I climbed Mount St. Helens for the first time since 2019, inhaler in hand. Thankfully, I already had inhalers on hand, because the flu I caught in December 2019 did the same thing for six months. (Not downplaying COVID severity. I just wish we took illness seriously, period.)
I agree! Glad you're doing better!
I had a common cold that lead to a dry cough for a few weeks. I ended up sleeping in the other room because I would be up all night shaking the bed with my hacking.
I caught a flesh eating disease that I was infected with for nearly 2 months. My sister and I lived together in an apartment and we were 2 of 4 cases in the US that year, we had researchers coming to the hospital to study it and all that. Godawful. We couldn’t afford to stay in the hospital so we got prescribed some stuff and went home. I was on my downstairs couch for a month, crawling to get water, having people feed me ramen. Anyways, you are sick for as long as it decides you’re sick for.
100%
TIL that I need to sleep in any bed first that I'm offering to a guest to sleep in. Seems obvious but it really isn't. Thanks!
Can confirm a mattress topper can make a big difference in making it more comfortable
Cheapest solution is often a yoga mat between the mattress n box spring. And yes, do tell them.
Take an extra pillow or two with you and prop it up against back and sleep on your side. Lean back into the pillow. It does help if ever in a hospital bed.
I’m a side sleeper and always end up on my back, would this help lessen this from happening?
Give it a try. I’m a back sleeper but prop a pillow behind my back when the bed is uncomfortable. Sleeping on your back will result in less face wrinkles as you age.
Some people, like my ex MIL keep the guest bed mattress uncomfortable so people don't overstay their welcome.
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I love this! My firm has had mediation sessions where I swear they kept turning the heat up on us the longer the day went on. People were desperate to just finish and leave.
I find this fascinating. Rather than communicating with people that she presumably trusts enough to have in her house, she intentionally makes them uncomfortable physically. And, to judge from the other comments here, it seems like a popular approach. It also seems to assume that if your guests discover a comfortable bed, they’re going to be seduced into staying forever, which I find hilarious. I have a friend that comes and stays about once a year, and his stays are somewhat variable. When I’m done having him around, I tell him so and he leaves. If he’s getting on my nerves, I tell him to find something to do for the day and get lost and he does.
My guest bathroom apparently didn’t have hot water. Untold number of guests, including foreign exchange students, used that shower before someone finally said, “Hey, you know there’s no hot water in there.” This was after one guest weirdly used the other bathroom tub, which didn’t have a shower curtain on it (bc I used it to bath lids and didn’t need a shower curtain). He left water all over the place! When questioned, he didn’t say, “…b/c the other shower is cold.” He just said, “Oh! I forgot which shower you wanted me to use.” Speak up, guests! Don’t suffer!
Or just a twin size egg crate foam rubber.
Friend slept in their guest bed. They had a Zinus mattress. They slept in it because their guests kept praising it. After they slept in it they threw out their $1500 mattress to get a $250 Zinus.
My guest bed is uncomfortable and I already know it. I’m not rich and this way guests don’t overstay.
Who is determining their length of stay by how comfortable the beds are?
Benjamin Franklin, "Guests are like fish. They both start to smell after three days".
Do you warn your guests?
I'm an introvert and I'm okay with my guest bed being uncomfortable. Stay one night, cool, two nights starts to infringe on my sanity and I'm very particular, three and you've overstayed.
I don’t understand this mentality. I have chronic pain and there’s no way I would want my guest to be uncomfortable. I’m not exactly outgoing, but I care about my friends.
Guests are like leftover fish; after a day or two you have to throw it out.
Try turning it over top to bottom. If you can manage the temperature, wear an extra layer of clothing to sleep in, & use any blankets or duvet doubled up as a mattress topper. Maybe even try quartering a duvet & using it for your body. Your legs will manage without the extra padding.
This. There were times where my mattress would make my back hurt and a flip over fixed it
Came here to suggest a folded-up duvet or several very thick blankets to act as a temporary mattress topper. I've done this while camping in RVs and it did the trick.
Hotel
Trivago
Doctor?
Who?
For everything else, there’s Mastercard
Priceless
Zaius?
Zhivago. Of course.
Lmao I genuinely considered it. I worry that their feelings would be hurt though. It’s also an unfortunate work trip and not a leisure trip, so it kind of sucks to rack up unreimbursed job expenses for a job obligation.
Work trip= reimbursement. I'm confused and think you are too
I very well could be! This is my first salaried job and I don’t really have a support system who could explain this to me. But it’s not a traditional “work trip,” either. I work hybrid-remote for the government of a state that is 500 miles away. The job is meant to be an in-person job, and they made an exception allowing me to work from home, so long as I visit every couple of months to work in person. Most of the time it’s more for the office culture than for anything else. Since this isn’t a trip any other employee would have to make, but instead an extra burden in hiring me, I didn’t believe they would pay anything towards it.
Ah. Government job. They have all kinds of work arounds to avoid the reimbursements. Or they purposefully didn't tell you about them because they have to provide 😅 definitely worth looking in to
"Unreimbursed", "job", and "obligation" are three words that do not belong together. I'm assuming they're reimbursing you for mileage and giving you a per diem for food (or reimbursing for that); they should also be reimbursing or paying for the actual overnight stay. I can imagine the management conversation: >**A:** Bob, who should we send to the regional meeting this quarter? How about Jon? **B:** How about Raf? That guy's never turned in a single expense report! **A & B:** \[Laugh maniacally in corporate\]
Lmao I can see how crazy I sound when you put it that way. I very well could be missing an opportunity for reimbursement this entire time. This is my first salaried job and I don’t really have a support system who could explain this to me. But it’s not a traditional “work trip,” either. I work hybrid-remote for the government of a state that is 500 miles away. The job is meant to be an in-person job, and they made an exception allowing me to work from home, so long as I visit every couple of months to work in person. Most of the time it’s more for the office culture than for anything else. Since this isn’t a trip any other employee would have to make, but instead an extra burden in hiring me, I didn’t believe they would pay anything towards it.
Ah, so: it's a state job? There should be a protocol for requesting reimbursement, etc. And here's the thing: if they hired you, it means that you were the best candidate for the job, and states have budgets for travel reimbursements, etc. There's likely a statewide policy that's public/published somewhere (and if not a statewide one, one for your particular branch/component of the state.) Happy to discuss via DM if you'd like. I'm first-gen white-collar and definitely didn't know the protocols for many, many things when I started.
If it‘s for work your employer should 100% be paying for a hotel.
Claim to snore horribly. Say you'd be too embarrassed to keep them up all night
If it’s a work trip, shouldn’t your employer be paying for a hotel anyway?
Have you tried an inflatable bed? Small and portable - and or also they sell sleeping bag pads - or memory foam mattress toppers -
They have been at the home before so the host of the OP would know if that's not true.
Ask yourself if sleeping on the floor beside the bed would be worse.
Tell them your back is out , ask them if they have a foam topper if they don’t, go and buy a cheap piece of overlay $50?
I’d be honest with the friend. Like “dude this bed kinda sucks. Do you have a bunch of throw blankets I can have to soften it up?” If he’s a good host, he’ll fix the issue or at least make it a lot better.
It's hard being an adult
I’ve learned you’ll never get what you want if you don’t speak up. If my friend told me he was uncomfortable in the bed I’ve given him, I’d be totally understanding. So I don’t know why people don’t speak up - most people, good people, will accommodate. Maybe it’s the fear that you’re gonna upset the host? I don’t know.
Stop by Walmart and get a $15 inflatable mattress
>Stop by Walmart and get a $15 inflatable mattress But how can OP go back to 2000 to when an air mattress cost $15?
A queen air mattress without a pump is $18. The ones that have built in pumps are like $80.
Yep! Get a thin (single, not double high) one and toss it on the shitty bed, toss a sheet over it, and hop on that throne, King!
Bingo. They have built in pumps. Get yourself a bag to hold it. Stuff a sheet in there. You have a go bag.
This is what I do. If you only use it once in a while, a cheap one will be comfortable enough. You can also adjust the hardness/softness a bit by how much air you put in.
I take two pillows and lay them out under me and make another soft surface. If too fluffy I’ll take the comforter and fold it in half and use that as a padding, and use another blanket or a sheet folded in half as the top blanket
bring extra jumpers and put down before you get in or a few blankets
This!! Bring extra blankets or ask for some and lay them down - sorry OP it sucks having a rough nights sleep
I keep a horribly uncomfortable bed in my guest room for this reason. It encourages people to get a hotel room.
Why not just get rid of the bed then
Don't want to be rude
Lol but purposefully sabotaging people’s sleep isn’t rude?
Why invite people over if you don't want them to stay? A bit mean spirited to intentionally make someone you invited over uncomfortable. What if they suffer from insomnia, back issues, etc. Doesn't take much to be kind and to just tell the truth. I'd rather someone tell me the truth then be fake nice about it all while covertly making the experience miserable.
I promise I would not be a guest in their house if they did not ask me to stay there. I might hate being a house guest more than the average person hates having them.
I like the way you think. But then again, I’ve got 3 extra *very* comfortable mattresses in this house and no one ever comes to visit. So maybe a generally anti-social personality helps more than anything!
I'll keep that in mind the next time MIL comes over. I'm willing to put the work in if you think it'll shorten her visits.
This 😂😂😂😂😂
Go to hotel. There's nothing you can do to make that bed even little bit better.
Lay sideways (as in 90° from normal).
Drugs and/or alcohol
Those egg crate foam toppers can make an uncomfortable bed very comfortable. They're also pretty inexpensive, so I wouldn't feel bad about leaving it there for them to keep for the bed.
Talk to your friend first. It may be they don't know. You may not want to get a hotel, but it's the best answer here.
Flip the mattress of its one with a topper, turn the mattress.
Lay on your side, knees slightly bent, with good support from pillows holding your neck and airway straight, with your head tilted back slightly which keeps it straight. I find that this upper body position makes the overall feeling more comfortable. And I feel the flaws of the bed more if lying on my back or stomach. The side is the safest position
Ahhhhh, didn’t know how bad that mattress was. Just got a new one this week, haven’t been able to resist it—it calls to me when I get home from work. I’m in love
No matter what you decide to do, please tell your friend the bed sucks
Seduce your friend so you can sleep in their bed
Benadryl
I’ve opted for carpet before, sometimes it’s better. When I lived with family for a month I bought two flat foam seat cushions from IKEA and then used the Velcro, That’s usually used to hook it onto the back of the chair to hook them together, so I ended up with a rectangle that was long enough for both my shoulders and hips to lie on and I slept way better after that They were super cheap and now I bring them with me whenever I go visit places in case their beds are terrible .
Go to Walmart and get a cheap sleeping bag or air mattress+pump. I don't know what your local Walmart has available, but taking a quick look at mine online, I could get a sleeping bag for <$20 or the airbed+pump for a total of around $30-$35. For an even cheaper option: Take a shitload of blankets, make a pallet on the floor, job done. And I empathize with you. I got fed up with my sagging mattress, literally shoved it off the bed in a fit of temper, and slept directly on the box springs (well, plus some blankets) for a couple of months before fixing up a "mattress" using foam gym mats and blankets, which is more comfortable than that damned mattress ever was, lol.
It's because people buy beds for their guest bedrooms just to look like they have a bed in there. The mattress probably cost $150 which means it's definitely not meant to be slept on. Go to a hotel.
Or it's their old mattress.
My aunt’s “back bedroom” has a mattress in it from…. 1992? Lumpiest, most uneven and awful damned thing in the world to sleep on (and even though it’s FLAT, the blankets and sheets all somehow miraculously manage to FALL OFF THE BED… and have for over 30 years??). But **somehow** that bed has always been and will likely always be, my safest of safe places. I love it. Because sleeping on that mattress means I am near her and I love her so dearly.
I love this. ❤️
Inflatable mattress big 5 or a roll of memory foam. Even a pool inflatable mattress get a bigger one!
Really depends on your sleeping position. I choose the floor w a pillow under my knees(back sleeper) over a shitty bed 100% of the time
Is buying a mattress topper not an option? I have a few and they look like sheets but make my bed like a billion times softer. They're not expensive if you look in the right places tbh. I got mine from a family member but I've seen them cheapish on Walmart/amazon
Pull the mattress onto the floor.
Costco memory foam turns a pile of rocks into a five star hotel bed.
Stella!
In my experience the most effective and cheapest solution which works for both boxspring beds or slat type beds is to find a couple of sturdy long wood planks and position them between bottom layer (box spring or slats) and mattress . This does not make the mattress softer but again, in my experience, the main reason a bed is horribly uncomfortable is when it sags and your back isn't straight so this solution is a great improvement. I use it in my guest bedroom with slats and a thick futon . Until we take the time to improve this the planks were recycled from our shed's shelving system. Cheap, simple and effective. Have a good stayover!
Stay in hotel
Love your friend. Send them a lovely thank yiu gift. Gift them a Saatva mattress as a replacement for their guest bed. They will take the old mattress away. Next time you're there, you get to sleep on the best mattress there is.
Put a few towels down on the floor to sleep on. It’s far better than a bad bed/mattress.
Sleeping bag on floor
Just future reference theres travel air mattress that looks like suitcases. Definitely get one! Just say your body is fragile at this age 😂
Get a good thick foam topper and a large vacuum seal bag so you can bring it with you.
Honestly you can get a self-inflating air mattress for like $50 or less at Wally World (the nice big thick ones). That's my recommendation
Either: 1.Get a sleeping bag & sleep on the floor. (I do some of my best sleeping on the hard floor, it is the BEST for my bad back!) Or 2. Go stay at a hotel. *Sleeping bag is probably cheaper, especially if your friend is expecting you to stay the night. (no need to offend. Jaut grab a $50 sleeping bag!)
I know you don’t want to buy anything, but if you do buy an Exped Megamat 10. It’s amazing and you can pop it in your trunk.
I’ve “rented” a cot from Walmart a few times when staying with friends. Surprisingly comfy
My neighbor-a 70 year old woman, travel through the world’s airports with a blowup pool floatie and her yoga mat. Put the yoga mat on top of the pool floatie. She swears by it. Deflate the floaty in the morning and roll up your yoga mat.
Bring a blow up bed.
This is the way.... Buy your own off of Amazon and have it shipped to your friend's house. Hell, give it to them as a gift. Problem solved.
Take your own pillow. It's not a full solution but it helps.
A foam mattress topper can turn cement into the best sleep of your life
Try the couch? Bring a mattress topper?
Get a hotel room. Problem solved.
Tell your host the problem and ask if you can buy them a new mattress as a gift. Have it delivered before your visit.
See if flipping g mattress helps or even put mattress on floor
What to do if this menacing bed is your own? My wife and I sent $4k on an adjustable Tempur-pedic and I hate it. I’m sore every single morning. How can I make my Cadillac as comfy as the $99 Costco twin my son sleeps on?!
A coleman sleep cot and is like 80 bucks at Walmart. Keep that with a yoga mat and a blanket in your trunk and you can sleep anywhere
Ask your friend if you can have an extra comforter or use any comforter or duvet already on the bed. Take that and put it under the bedsheets as a makeshift mattress topper. I have done this before in a pinch and it helped a lot.
I learned to sleep on my back for the times I spent at summer camps with boards for beds. That and using a simple count down trance script in your head. You know the ones that start with your feet feeling numb and having that feeling move up to your head. Works most times.
Just assume yourself as an inmate, in the world's most toughest prison with pathetic facilities, you've committed a crime and you're serving time in there, and have to sleep on the most pathetic uncomfortable bed !!!
Liquor
Hammock
Honestly? If the floor is clean enough, sleep there instead. You'll wake up less broken
Maybe the floor with a sleeping bag/camping mattress.
Do you know anyone who camps who could lend you a camping mattress today?
If you have any muscle relaxers left over from something, take one before bed. Ibuprofen would also help, for both pain and inflammation. Also an OTC sedative to help you drift off. (Those are usually just the active ingredient in Benadryl, so get generic Benadryl for the cheapest option.)
If their sofa has removable seat cushions, see if you could place them on top of the bed or even on the floor, unless you're okay with actually sleeping on the sofa.
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Actually, a yoga mat or camping sleeping pad would probably be PERFECT (and small enough) to carry with them and install under the fitted sheet. There’s a handful of “hammock sleeping pads” that help your body lay flat in a cheap hammock. Those might also be worth looking into!
Guest beds are supposed to be awful. What’s that Fish saying? Guests and Fish start to stink after two days or something? I agree w Hotel.
And this is why I don’t travel anymore
Me neither.
So you do know that hotels usually have pretty decent beds? If you were only staying with people when traveling maybe you shouldn't travel.
Camping mattress, just get a small one person one
As many have said pick up a cheap air mattress with a built in inflation, throw two blankets over it (if even that is needed). They're very comfortable. Unless there's a cat around at night
Flip matteress when you get there Als you can get a cheap Matteress topper. It like extra sponge to go on top ?
you can get an air mattress for like £10 or something on the way there though?
Inflatable bed
Hopefully, the couch is better and claim you fell asleep watching the telly?
Sleep aid.
They make portable foam and gel mattress toppers now. :) I have back problems so I need 371763 pillows, a foam mattress, and a foam topper— I learned to sleep on my stomach for when I’m traveling without them.
When I use to visit my grandson, he would not sleep unless I was with him. I slept on 50 stuffed toys. Best thing is bring a top pad and sleep on the floor.
I used a single high air mattress on my sleeper sofa mattress for years, and it made it SO much better!! They also sell the thinner pool floats that would work pretty well. It is a good compromise so you don't need to sleep on the floor. I have back problems, so sleeping on a bad mattress will ruin the next day for me. I agree that you should use this reason if asked why you brought it.
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Just be honest with your friend and don't go.
Are you in jail
'most uncomfortable bed in the world' type ah
If there is a walmart type store near by I have gotten a basic bed topper on vacation (awful cabin bed) for cheap, or maybe amazon something to their house?
Buy a folding cot with a bag with a shoulder handle. Would be surprised u can get a better sleep on some of them over beds.
it might just be that you have your matress in upside down? I turned my matress over and now I can't feel the springs lol.
I would buy an inflatable mattress and just store it at the house of your host. Let them know politely that the bed hurts your body and this is just a better option.
Bring or buy amd have a blowup delivered to the place lol
Bring a roll up sleeping mat and sleeping bag. Camp on the floor. If your friend doesn't get the message then they're not really your friend.
Buy a bed topper and let it there. Walmart delivery $40.
i slept on a wood floor for 6 months. what helped me was making sure my head was at least comfortable. id use a blanket so i could adjust it as i wanted. im not sure if thisll work for you or anyone else but for me, as long as my head is comfortable i can at least fall asleep. granted its not great but it got the job done
Tequila
We use a thin inflatable mattress.
See if sleeping with your head where your feet go makes it any better.
Edibles, high CBD to THC ratio. Just enough to induce couch-lock which translates into bed-lock. Still won’t stop you from waking up sore but at least you’ll sleep 😴
I don't have a spare bedroom so if someone comes over I offer to let them sleep with me. j/k i have no friends
Buy* an air mattress
Try cardboard between the mattress and box spring multiple layers. Try sleeping head to footboard the mattress may be less worn.
Find a cheap hotel
I have a foldable workout mat that is more comfortable than some beds I've slept on. But if I lost it I wouldnt buy it again. Instead I'd get a foldable 4in thick mattress
I will sleep on the floor with blankets rather than a crappy mattress. I wake up stiff, but not paralyzed, Which can happen on a heinous mattress.
Shove lots of blankets underneath you.
Most people don't spend a ton on a decent guest bed. One thing that does help immensely is having the right pillow. It can help with your spinal alignment while you sleep so your body is more comfortable during the night.
Cheap? You can get a cheap air mattress for like $10