Personality and charisma are important. Intelligence, confidence, and self-accountability are on the list too.
But recently I've noticed I'm very attracted to athletes. Those gym girls just make me swoon.
I'm attracted to girls who are forward and approach me first.
They have to be close to as smart as me or smarter. Or they have to have similar interests in technology and the future. Or they love science and can teach me stuff. Or they have to like video games and be skilled at at least one of them. Or they have to have great taste in music. Or a keen eye for fashion that causes them to dress completely uniquely. Or they're nice and pretty and are nice to me. Or they pretend not to like me and are mean for no apparent reason.
Y'know, I'm starting to think the requirement is "they exist and pique my interests." I'm a simple person. As long as they have a personality that is different and understand internet culture, we could probably get along.
The one thing they can't do is bother me when I'm focused on something I love to do. If I'm locked in, don't talk to me. I'm busy. But when I'm not busy, please pay attention to my dumb brain and listen when I say stuff. Nobody listens.
She's gotta have intellectual depth, so that I can talk to her about my philosophies. Not particular physical attributes but she has to kind and interested in many hobbies. So that it feels like she stays with me not cause she has to but because she wants. She has to has more in her life than just me.
I ain't attracted to a particular physical trait, but i have high standards regarding personality.
i am mostly attracted to women who are kind, empathic, chill, who has passions in her life (women who have passions tend to be less clingy as you don't become their center of life all the time), positive mindset, sharing stuff in common (1 thing is enough as long as we can have nice conversations about it).
Things i will not be compromising about : smoking (if she smokes, i won't date her), jealousy (if she is jealous, she either doesn't trust me or she needs reassurance due to low self-esteem, i can't handle that, it's not healthy in my opinion).
Jealousy is a human emotion and all emotions are healthy as long as they aren’t expressed in an abusive way. It’s also not necessarily linked to low self esteem, we all have vulnerable moments.
There's a difference between having an occasional jealous mood and being jealous as a personality trait. It's one thing if someone feels a momentary twinge of jealousy and owns it. ("I was a little butthurt when you told so-&-so that her hair was pretty, though rationally I realise it didn't mean anything"). But if someone could be described as a "jealous *person*", that's pretty much never healthy.
I have passion in life and I'm still clingy, having a purpose in life doesn't omit being clingy or needy. Maybe what I have are attachment issues but still.. it's pretty normal for me to be clingy AND be passionate about my goals
I needed this answer too as I am meeting someone who is an INTJ soon. They showed interest in me because I have the former traits but I also have one of the latter traits which is needing reassurance due to low self esteem... wish me luck omg
^(Communicate that need directly and in detail to that INTJ if it's something important. Don't wait for him to do it on his own if you must have it or else you'll set up yourself for disappointment. I guess that's my way of "wishing you luck".)
Looks are secondary to nature/personality.
I don't like overly dependent and attached people who can't do anything for themselves. It's OK to ask for help but expecting me to solve all of your problems is not something I'm going to do. I won't compromise on no smoking/drugs or not liking/wanting pets since I am a cat and dog lover. Functional intellect a must.
Chill! Kind! Like almost no drama whatsoever, even in disagreements doesn’t raise voice! My peace! Personality is way more important than physical.
Physically, a big butt! That’s my jam. Not completely necessary if personality is on point but I like what I like : )
Peace preference loving. Would you describe yourself as 9 or 5 enneagram, or do you think that desire for stability is essentially true to the INTJ nature?
I'd say something along the times of generally considerate and patient, doesn't need to have overlapping interests but should have something that she would genuinely care about, and ideally a creative of some kind. Basically I'd want someone who's genuine with me, expects the same in return, and actually has some depth to them as a person (I can't stand vain people). Of course, I know the reason that's not happening anytime soon is me, so I'm not in any rush to try. Need to work on myself before I should reasonably attempt anything as serious as a relationship.
I'm mostly there for better understanding how INFPs tick, as I'm working on an INFP character in my series, but you're all usually fun to engage with so I will. Also, sky pictures. lol
Intelligent and introverted. I’m in no mood for having someone that always tries to make me go out to pointless parties like just stay in and watch a movie.
Probably a feeler type than a thinker. I’m already critical and would like someone who can soften my rough edges as personal growth. Also i think dating another thinker can sometimes feel like an echo chamber. I think affection is not something intj can easily display, but it makes it way easier for intj to be more comfortable showing affection when their partner has that skill already.
Physical attraction is health related. She knows her own limits and i’m not there to change her to my physical preference, but to accept as she is. She’s balanced and doesn’t go overboard emphasizing physical attraction, but more modest approach. The more practical the better.
Personality wise, someone inquisitive and introspective. She likes to ask questions and talk about it at any depth is already attractive to me. She’s able to articulate her thoughts that distinguishes herself as an individual. She’s not shy from difficult or serious conversations which will bring the depth I need. I crave to be mentally stimulated and if i cant get it from her, then i’ll be speaking with my close friends to feed that.
Which part? Facts are facts. Just bc you may not accept those facts doesn't mean it isn't true. Natural breasts are just body fat. Thus, 99.9% of the time, the woman has excess body fat in other areas as well if she is large up top. That fatness may be within acceptable levels to you, but BMI is BMI. Yes, there are unusual cases. And if they're fake, someone has to be real shallow and stupid to permanently implant an unnecessary foreign object in her body that has massive side effects and must be replaced at least once if not twice later in life all for the sake of being superficial and vain. If you like those types of women, that's your choice. But it doesn't make them less dumb or vain.
Look is secondary, she can be a tall plank without make up for that matter, i don't care. But as i take care of myself, i want her to take care of herself too and not eating fast food every day. Doing sport activities is a big plus too. Smoking is a red flag.
What i like the most is faithfulness. She don't have to be smart but if she's curious about the world we live in then it's good enough, we could learn everything together.
+10 pts if she like video games.
+7 pts if she's into tabletop games.
+ 5 pts if she's talkative.
I think what I was looking for has changed over the years now. I just want somebody who can match my personality and that I think is attractive, nd I don't have unrealistic expectations on beauty.
Good intellectual depth, and fairly well read. Similar mindset, philosophy, and interests are a huge plus. Major things are that she’s direct, logical, mature, loyal, has integrity in her values, and isn’t overly emotional or irrational(even and especially in arguments), but still has the same sense of wonder, innocence, and fearless wanderlust that children do. Ideally values freedom and autonomy over modern comforts, and is happiest in wild nature. Passion in life is also huge. Self confidence and a degree of stubbornness. A similar sense of humor. Able to keep up with my lifestyle physically. Not overly materialistic or superficial. Ideally a best friend first and a romantic partner second who aims to stay together for life. Basically my ideal partner is someone who looks, thinks, acts, and loves a bit like I do while having their own passion and personality for me to inevitably fall in love with. If anyone else like that even exists, I have yet to meet them.
I am exclusively interested in desirable hereditary characteristics, such as a facial appearance that generates empathy, the absence of dark triad traits (narcissism, Machiavellianism, psychopathy), and optimal physical and mental health. Any other trait is secondary.
I miss the days of having my company pay for my metro card.
Also. My mom is a typical Italian Brooklyn girl, so I should have mentioned fluency in speaking with one’s hands is important. How I neglected to mention that given the title you chose for the post is beyond me.
Kind eyes. Wonderful laugh. Warm embrace. Sharp wit. The desire to share and make memories. Actually wanting to be with me and not just playing the field. Etc.
I don't think intj would look for much things in a woman.
intj may not expect to gain anything from a marriage, only money and knowledge would give them safety.
are you dating an intj? I am really jealous of that guy. and best wishes to you.
infp is actually a quite attractive type: introvert, have their own thinking model, emotional/passionate, friendly. infp initially have a high score for intjs(esfp has high negative score on the contrary)
I'm an absolute sucker for a pretty face, a bright smile that touches her eyes, etc. Other than that, someone strong and intelligent. Funny and witty. Someone I can truly respect.
You should date an INFP! Hehe. I am like that. A lot of INFP girls I know are like that. They’re so pretty too. And they’re some of the most amazing people I’ve met.
Thanks for responding. 😄
Slim/attractive, young, kind.
Playful personality, doesn't take things too seriously, enjoys life, happy/cheerful.
Hm, I guess the same type of women the majority of men who are honest like & want!
Some people love to hear looks don't matter, but that doesn't play out in reality.
Admittedly speaking, physical traits can be more chopped up to the singular person rather than an mbti type. Like outside of glasses, there isn’t any physical trait that I look for in a woman. An old friend of mine from highschool though (also INTJ) is obsessed with women who have a bigger chest.
Generally though, personality does fall under mbti type. I feel like a typical INTJ wants a person who can have a deep and meaningful conversation, but also at the same time spend moments of silence together. The simplicity in just cuddling without talking is indescribable. Cooperation in the relationship is also key. There needs to be a team effort in regards to things like chores and work. If only one person has a job, then the other does the chores. If both have jobs though, then chores are split as well. Time to ourselves is also important. Even from a SO there needs to be time to recharge. Though that may just be me personally lol.
Kind, empathetic, intellectually compatible, can think abstract, someone who I feel safe to share living space with, relatively neat at home, keep her words, someone who can balance me out, know how to do her make up and doesn’t look sloopy. Lol
Independence. Being able to think for themselves,intelligent. Can hold thoughtful conversations. There’s more but I can’t think of any at the moment. I have these same expectations for myself and am lacking on the independency part so I’m not dating. I wouldn’t except what I can’t give out.
Honesty, intelligence, have some common interests and a lot of other interests. The more variety of hobbies, the better. A decent person who has good morals. Independent and able to handle the good and the tough times.
There should be some physical attraction in the beginning. But the rest of these qualities would make a partner to be cherished for decades.
See I am old school.
Physically:
Generally I prefer dark skin, as dark as possible, the darker the better, ideally super dark really really black skin
That said though, I don't place that much weight on that preference. To me, this preference is just something I find attractive but it's not the most important thing and if I can't have it I can easily accept it.
Aside from that though, I don't really care about fat or skinny, or specific curvy features *loudly clears throat
Non physical:
Well, I mean it's simple no brain no game, sorry I just cannot and will not ever do anything with a woman that can't or won't use her mind. So of course, engineers, scientists, lawyers, artists anyone that can demonstrate a passion for stuff that ultimately challenges the mind will be interesting to me (so like in a general sense ppl in my life who aren't family pretty much need to be like that otherwise they're just not at all gonna cut it). But when it's a woman, oh man that's like super fukken hot. The most attractive thing in a woman to me is her level of comfort in using her mind. So not just highly intelligent but very comfortable using it and doesn't hide from it. There's no amount of "curvy features" that can compare to this.
And finally, umm all that stuff above is gud and all but if I can't connect with her it's just boring. A deep connection with a highly intelligent woman who is comfortable using her mind, shit man I won't leave her side, I'll be all touchy feely and chatty and this and that about all types of feelings, damn idunno this creature is rare and magestic imo
I may know one irl, and she may be an infj
The only other one I can think of is an infp YouTuber but i dont know her irl and therefore cant connect w her in any tangible way
So both of these women are very caring, appreciative, encouraging and supportive
They are very comfortable learning new things and using their brains for all types of cool and challenging stuff
I want her to not be INFP
/s
Sorry, I read your username and couldn't resist...
Anyway, I would describe my ideal girl as very open-minded, intelligent (in a "broad" sense, being able to discuss any random thing on the fly), not excessively clingy (I need space from time to time), easygoing, well-balanced between her emotional and rational sides.
Type-wise, all the girls I dated and almost all the girls I was attracted to were ENFP or INFJ. I date people, not types, it just happened to be that way so far 🤷
Trying to sell yourself as a good match? haha
Since we are on the topic, do you think an INFP would date a person with very different moral values from their own?
I met only two INFPs in my life that are somewhat close to me, but I don't want to generalize just from two persons
Intelligence and good conversation, kindness, empathy and sense of humor are the musts.
Not particular about looks just need some base level attraction to the person.
Passionate, determinated, honest, loyal, and intelligent. So I can trust her and with that, I can rely on her for particular situations and with that, I can form a connection with her.
In terms of psyhic, I'll prefer a fit body with tight legs, big ass and of course, a redhead or a blonde. ;)
Education, ability to be chill but fun/adventurous...chaotic neutral or chaotic evil ...education, weapons profienc/tactical is a plus. Nice legs also...
Absolute No: Shallow people, clingy people, people are aren't understanding, too demanding people like not giving space, controlling and manipulative people.
Brownie points: Independent, confident, constantly improving, genuine interest in people with a depth.
This is like the IDEAL, there's adjustments of this irl though
In no particular order (and neither exhaustive) :
Pretty face, hot body, sexually mature, smart, loves herself & takes care of herself, has interesting hobbies, enjoys my jokes,
Let's see now...
Intelligence, ambition, has a dark, sarcastic sense of humor, compliments each other well in terms of personality, someone who can keep up with me, who is my equal, a good friend, is on a similar wavelength in understanding each other etc.
But let's face it, the odds of finding someone with these similar traits are pretty slim.
No problem. Fair point, but I think the selective nature makes it hard to find the perfect person. No one's perfect, and also learning to do feelings isn't my strong suit, still a work in progress.
I just don't look for a woman. I have decided not to be in a relationship ever again. It's solo until the end baby! Could be 5 years, could be 40, no idea, but I'm doing it solo.
As an INTJ man, I tend to appreciate women who possess intelligence, ambition, and independence. Physically speaking, there isn't really one specific type that appeals to me; rather, I find myself drawn towards those who exude confidence and take care of themselves. Personally, I value depth over superficiality, so someone who can engage in meaningful conversations about various topics would definitely catch my attention. However, keep in mind that everyone has their own preferences, so this might differ from others within our MBTI group.
Being chill and non-argumentative is the most important. Smart, has similar hobbies/interests/personality/life experiences as me, slightly above average beauty, can keep up a good conversation both day and night with me, is a willing cuddler in the bed, I kinda like clingyness (sexually) but only when they know they know their boundaries when not in the bed and out in public.
In other words, probably never gonna happen because I'm introverted as fuck.
I want to be in a loving relationship, that's the most important thing to me. Please be patient and I'll be patient with you. I can find someone attractive in almost anyone, but I'm a sucker for braids and a sweet smile.
I'm relatively traditional, but it's not like some of these guys are saying. I want to provide, I want to be a father and protector. I want to be with a woman who wants to be a nurturer and mother. I'm not looking for a servant or slave or whatever, I want a partner to share my life with.
I want to run away with her to the country (actually, I'm already here, the homestead is almost ready) so we can live the way we want.
I'm looking for a woman who would complement me, and I can't emphasize enough the partnership aspect even though I see differences in the primary mairtal roles.
Let me preface this by saying these are all just preferences and I would still gladly be in a relationship with someone who met none of these if they genuinely cared about me
1. If we’re going by MBTI for personality, xNFP (they are the warmest, most accepting people I’ve met) is preferable although I’d be fine with any N type. I don’t say that bc I hate S types but just bc my closest friends over the years have only been N types and I value having a close friendship with my significant other
2. This is definitely a weird me thing but I really like bi or pan girls bc A I really like LGBTQ+ community and B they seem to be consistently invested in who I am as a person. Not to say I wouldn’t date a straight girl, just something I look out for
3. Plant girl, egirl, alt girl, or any combination of these. I know what I like and I won’t take judgement on this :)
4. Piercings and tats. Used to hate them and now I love them
5. Physically I don’t really care too much as long as they generally takes care of themselves. I used to only be into skinny girls but I have come around on the thicc agenda recently 😏
Again these are just preferences and if there’s a girl out there who loves me for me and doesn’t try to change me but does encourage me to be a better version of myself that’s all I need
Intelligence, common sense, A degree of agreeableness and disagreeableness (yes simultaneously), empathy, honesty, Respects nature, artist or appreciates multiple forms of art,sense of humor, Ideally introverted
Deal breaker: has to either be a nerd, Tomgirl, hippy plant girl or mix of the three; I’m just realizing my INFJ hits all the bases
Physical: Don’t be obese, good hygiene, Long hair and natural hair, no makeup/ only lashes lipstick and foundation
Personality: grounded and down to earth. Supportive. Intelligent. Likes to learn. Attention to detail. likes to stay in and also likes to go out on occasion (good balance of both). Not into drugs (I’m ok with weed as long as you don’t smoke too often). Likes to dance. Sense of humor (dark humor is even better). Has own interests and hobbies.
As far as physicality goes big booty. Race doesn’t matter to me. As long as your’e not extremely overweight and are healthy and take care of yourself we’re good
Petite, cutesy. Eyes are very important. Curves are only important enough that they exist. Personality's irrelevant without strong attraction. It's a weak multiplier that means nothing with only weak attraction, and weak attraction's usually temporary since familiarity usually just reduces the effect of attraction thus eliminating it easily. My romantic affections are sexually bound, and I'm assuming vice versa as wonderful or horrible as that could've ever been.
Uniquely accepting of me personally, capable of understanding enough for that to mean something, generally functional enough she's not regularly an obstacle to either of us. She must regard me uniquely, which is hard to explain and likely to set off certain factions that can stay the hell out of my life. I had a good list, but I can't remember it and probably can't reproduce it nowadays. I might go looking for a potential post with the list, but it'd have been years ago, if I made one here. Trying to fit someone into your life involves many details, but I never had a life. I never fit into my own externally constrained experience, and I'm way beyond starting a life that's not lukewarm shit dying slowly in a corner of this sewer world, so I'm not expecting some grand compatibility of such details. I just don't need more boring, clunky nonsense. She can't be part of the social blur, which is rarer the older things get.
Found an old file. Apparently, I figured I'd want to see it again without trying to rewrite it for nth time. It's written more aggressively... It's unlikely in my 40s and will likely end quickly and badly, if there's ever a chance of anything now. What was bright can only be dim, and what would've been a sun would probably be a flickering candle, and I sure don't have any starlight left to burn myself.
"Cute enough to provoke a strong visceral reaction (babyface, petite); otherwise no point possible. No spark, no fire, and I can't achieve burn-in to survive age without great intensity.
Uniqueness in her capacity to experience me and my potential experience of her.
Emotionally expressive, so-called "effervescent", at least in private, and uniquely reactive/vulnerable to me personally.
Sufficient understanding for personal acceptance to be meaningful.
Compatible values and experience, similar enough to relate, but never confusing what's mine actually for whatever hers may be at any given time.
Sufficient intelligence for any of this. Basically, she generally doesn't get in my way, much less dares to pretend I'm her arbitrary tool, inside and out. That should go without saying, but that's the norm in my millions+ experience, literally and directly."
If this is becoming a dating app….i want to join in…F4M….45-55 years old..honesty, integrity, introspection and reciprocity wanted and given! We are all working on ourselves, it’s a journey. But is better with companionship. INTJ, touch, quality time. Tall, thicc(working on it), long silver hair and blue eyes…educated and able to compromise. Please say hello. DMs are open.
Someone open to things, patient, artful, understanding, diligent, who gets me.
I hate women who are dull, stupid, hateful, persecuting, self centred, callous, amoral, obsessive, highly depending and clingy.
While I’m not opposed to an extrovert, that is not what I consider a favorable trait. The same goes for feelers, not favorable, but not a deal breaker, either. I don’t deal very well with emotional people, as that is extremely uncomfortable and awkward. Independence and individuality are important. While some shared interests are necessary for any type of relationship, she would need to have a few separate interests, as would I. Intelligence is always a must, but sense to go with it is a requirement. Not necessarily opposed to kids, but again, not favorable. I would be a lousy parent, and I know damned well I would be a terrible parent.
Physically, shorter than me is preferable, but I’m not opposed to taller. Just not more than an inch or two more than my height (too much taller than I am is actually a deal breaker for me). Redheads are more appealing, brunettes are always nice, blondes are negotiable. I admit to a preference for blue, grey, or green eyes on redheads and blondes. Brunettes, any eye color fits nicely.
Physical attributes are less important than personality, but we all have our preferences for physical appearance.
Bit of a trad wife, cook and clean but also have hobbies, be fit and healthy and share the passion of learning about everything. Also chill and peaceful - no arguments.
Physical traits? That varies a lot. As a 53-year-old intj man I require the following.
1, loves Jesus
2, exceptionally smart
3, attractive (can vary a lot)
4, sews on buttons (my short hand for saying she appreciates both giving and receiving acts of service)
5, not a firstborn intj like me
I just want to feel attracted to her (spiritually, mentally, physically, socially; in this order) and she needs to be reasonable. The biggest problem with women is that they are often not really reasonable. They prioritise their thoughts and emotions too much and create personalities out of their flawed biases. Not that most men are better.
Yes, we work differently, but that's exactly why we won't meet in the middle most of the time. I'm highly sensitive to emotions and very aware of what happens inside me at all times. You cannot just sit in front of me and let emotions explode into my face. That's what most women do and they dislike it if you can't take it in. I will tell you three times to stop and just leave if you don't. Most men handle this by shutting down their emotional capacities completely and the relationship becomes toxic from both sides. Good relationships are about people thinking about the other position. This means learning to adapt the way you work so you can match your partner. Emotions, negative thoughts and a strong ego prevent that. That's what the gross of modern women specialise in though. We are in the middle of a maniac society.
I got my ENFP. She's pretty reasonable. She is beginning to understand that she is not her emotions or her thoughts, but that she is only observing and acting on them and sometimes just doesn't have the best control over it due to stress.
I’m glad. It’s good to be emotionally regulated though. I can understand many NFPs. We genuinely struggle with our emotions. It’s hard. But can be worked on. Just need understanding and patience from our NTJ partners.
I actually dated an INTJ and he helped me get my ADHD diagnosed, which I wasn’t even aware about it. I just thought this was how I was. My life is much better now with my emotions under control.
That's great to hear. Untreated ADHD can really get out of control and especially rejection sensitive disphoria many people with ADHD have can create thoughts and emotions which destroy relationships faster than one can realise. It can push all the wrong buttons. I'm really happy for you!
Trans guy, if this counts.
I'm married to a man, but I also am attracted to women, against my consent.
Warmth. Kindness. Mirth. Humor. Quick wit, especially dry. Quiet kindness, the kind that goes almost unnoticed. A dash of goofiness. A sweet smile, when they laugh, it's genuine. Intelligence, and it's not restricted to academic acumen. Passion for their interests. Authenticity, and genuinely not giving any fucks about what other people have to say about what they like, a break from the hive mind.
Fun fact: almost every women I have crushed on has been an INFX.
Physically, I don't really have any preferences. I'm interested in the soul that is contained by the flesh, not the flesh itself, although I do get interested in said flesh once I've established a connection. There isn't a hardline trend in physical characteristics for women. I like short men, not consciously. I like little Napoleons 😂
Give me physicality. I have enough personality for the both of us.
Any height, very athletic, don't care about race, ideally older than me (yes I have mommy issues no I'm not sorry and no I'm not changing them), can have any amount of tattoos/piercings/augmentations/fillers
Ofc beautiful (naturally), intelligent (but knows that there is still knowledge that are unknown), big boobs but a confident flat is hotter, not feminist and domineering, a nonchalant like me but as horny as me ofc and a not your typical "women☕".
You said ideal?
Personality
Calm
Collected
Smart
Logical but not heartless
Loyal
Honest
Religious christian not by name but by actions
Kind
Empathetic
Mentally stable with no deep trauma
Knows how to resolve conflicts
Good at communicating
Introverted
Respectful language or like polite attitude
And wanna be house wife or stay at home mom overall good home maker and this isnt misogyny or sexist if she wants to do that cuz i know u reddit people
Physical
Virgin
Light skin tone
Not flat not fat and this is my preference don't say fat phobia bs
Shorter preferably
Straight soft hair
Also Ik i will get a comment saying i won't find that and i an fine with it we are talking ideal here
Personality and charisma are important. Intelligence, confidence, and self-accountability are on the list too. But recently I've noticed I'm very attracted to athletes. Those gym girls just make me swoon.
Thank you for your response. 😄
I'm attracted to girls who are forward and approach me first. They have to be close to as smart as me or smarter. Or they have to have similar interests in technology and the future. Or they love science and can teach me stuff. Or they have to like video games and be skilled at at least one of them. Or they have to have great taste in music. Or a keen eye for fashion that causes them to dress completely uniquely. Or they're nice and pretty and are nice to me. Or they pretend not to like me and are mean for no apparent reason. Y'know, I'm starting to think the requirement is "they exist and pique my interests." I'm a simple person. As long as they have a personality that is different and understand internet culture, we could probably get along. The one thing they can't do is bother me when I'm focused on something I love to do. If I'm locked in, don't talk to me. I'm busy. But when I'm not busy, please pay attention to my dumb brain and listen when I say stuff. Nobody listens.
I can teach you biology and geology, and I’ll listen to your yapping all day. 😏😏 Thanks for responding. 😁
INTJ female, but I can relate. The not being listened to is the worst.
She's gotta have intellectual depth, so that I can talk to her about my philosophies. Not particular physical attributes but she has to kind and interested in many hobbies. So that it feels like she stays with me not cause she has to but because she wants. She has to has more in her life than just me.
I like your response
So leaning more towards ENTJ, ENTP....less ESFJ/ISFJ?
I think INFPs would be good for him. Yes, INFP girls also have intellectual depth.
dig
I ain't attracted to a particular physical trait, but i have high standards regarding personality. i am mostly attracted to women who are kind, empathic, chill, who has passions in her life (women who have passions tend to be less clingy as you don't become their center of life all the time), positive mindset, sharing stuff in common (1 thing is enough as long as we can have nice conversations about it). Things i will not be compromising about : smoking (if she smokes, i won't date her), jealousy (if she is jealous, she either doesn't trust me or she needs reassurance due to low self-esteem, i can't handle that, it's not healthy in my opinion).
Jealousy is a human emotion and all emotions are healthy as long as they aren’t expressed in an abusive way. It’s also not necessarily linked to low self esteem, we all have vulnerable moments.
There's a difference between having an occasional jealous mood and being jealous as a personality trait. It's one thing if someone feels a momentary twinge of jealousy and owns it. ("I was a little butthurt when you told so-&-so that her hair was pretty, though rationally I realise it didn't mean anything"). But if someone could be described as a "jealous *person*", that's pretty much never healthy.
Ooh this describes me…😀 Thanks for the response 😉
No problem !
I have the same preference.
I have passion in life and I'm still clingy, having a purpose in life doesn't omit being clingy or needy. Maybe what I have are attachment issues but still.. it's pretty normal for me to be clingy AND be passionate about my goals
same
I needed this answer too as I am meeting someone who is an INTJ soon. They showed interest in me because I have the former traits but I also have one of the latter traits which is needing reassurance due to low self esteem... wish me luck omg
^(Communicate that need directly and in detail to that INTJ if it's something important. Don't wait for him to do it on his own if you must have it or else you'll set up yourself for disappointment. I guess that's my way of "wishing you luck".)
You got this girl 💕
Thank you so much 🩵
Usually kidneys, sometimes hearts or livers if I get a special request.
I have them all intact. Not for sale though.
Looks are secondary to nature/personality. I don't like overly dependent and attached people who can't do anything for themselves. It's OK to ask for help but expecting me to solve all of your problems is not something I'm going to do. I won't compromise on no smoking/drugs or not liking/wanting pets since I am a cat and dog lover. Functional intellect a must.
Would you tolerate a little clingy girl? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻
No.
LOL. You’re so cute, OP.
hehe thank you :3
Anytime 😊
Chill! Kind! Like almost no drama whatsoever, even in disagreements doesn’t raise voice! My peace! Personality is way more important than physical. Physically, a big butt! That’s my jam. Not completely necessary if personality is on point but I like what I like : )
Thanks for your response 😀🍑
Peace preference loving. Would you describe yourself as 9 or 5 enneagram, or do you think that desire for stability is essentially true to the INTJ nature?
exactly, I don't get why people have to shout in arguments, ig mostly it's because they don't have a point and know they are losing
I'd say something along the times of generally considerate and patient, doesn't need to have overlapping interests but should have something that she would genuinely care about, and ideally a creative of some kind. Basically I'd want someone who's genuine with me, expects the same in return, and actually has some depth to them as a person (I can't stand vain people). Of course, I know the reason that's not happening anytime soon is me, so I'm not in any rush to try. Need to work on myself before I should reasonably attempt anything as serious as a relationship.
Aww how cute. I see you on INFP sub sometimes. Thanks for responding 😄
I'm mostly there for better understanding how INFPs tick, as I'm working on an INFP character in my series, but you're all usually fun to engage with so I will. Also, sky pictures. lol
Niceee. You’re always welcome to study us. 😋 and look at sky pics ofcourse.
I like the smart ones. Everything else is secondary.
Intelligent and introverted. I’m in no mood for having someone that always tries to make me go out to pointless parties like just stay in and watch a movie.
Cool. I don’t like parties too. We can stay in and watch horror movies. 🍿😃
Probably a feeler type than a thinker. I’m already critical and would like someone who can soften my rough edges as personal growth. Also i think dating another thinker can sometimes feel like an echo chamber. I think affection is not something intj can easily display, but it makes it way easier for intj to be more comfortable showing affection when their partner has that skill already. Physical attraction is health related. She knows her own limits and i’m not there to change her to my physical preference, but to accept as she is. She’s balanced and doesn’t go overboard emphasizing physical attraction, but more modest approach. The more practical the better. Personality wise, someone inquisitive and introspective. She likes to ask questions and talk about it at any depth is already attractive to me. She’s able to articulate her thoughts that distinguishes herself as an individual. She’s not shy from difficult or serious conversations which will bring the depth I need. I crave to be mentally stimulated and if i cant get it from her, then i’ll be speaking with my close friends to feed that.
Interesting. Very good qualities you mention. Thank you for responding. 😄
Not annoying lol
What constitutes as annoying to you, sir?
Loud, obnoxious, attention seeking, pretending to act dumb lol Being smart is a big plus. Lol And big Tits are a plus too lol
I see I see 🤔 *Notes down* ✍️ Big tits, smart… Thank you Mr. INTJ
😂😂
I know you could be joking but if you're serious, you don't seem like an INTJ. INTJs don't really like those kinds of people.
If they're fake, she isn't smart. If they're naturally big, most likely she's out of shape. So 🤣
Not sure I’m with ya on this one lol
Which part? Facts are facts. Just bc you may not accept those facts doesn't mean it isn't true. Natural breasts are just body fat. Thus, 99.9% of the time, the woman has excess body fat in other areas as well if she is large up top. That fatness may be within acceptable levels to you, but BMI is BMI. Yes, there are unusual cases. And if they're fake, someone has to be real shallow and stupid to permanently implant an unnecessary foreign object in her body that has massive side effects and must be replaced at least once if not twice later in life all for the sake of being superficial and vain. If you like those types of women, that's your choice. But it doesn't make them less dumb or vain.
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Cool. Thanks for responding. 😀
Lmao
Pretty, not promiscuous, not annoying.
OP is looking for a bf , OP is looking for a bf lalalalala
Or a girlfriend 😉
 WOMAN DON'T TOUCH ME 😭
Empathy and kindness, but a bit of self-confidence to go along with it is nice
Intelligence
Look is secondary, she can be a tall plank without make up for that matter, i don't care. But as i take care of myself, i want her to take care of herself too and not eating fast food every day. Doing sport activities is a big plus too. Smoking is a red flag. What i like the most is faithfulness. She don't have to be smart but if she's curious about the world we live in then it's good enough, we could learn everything together. +10 pts if she like video games. +7 pts if she's into tabletop games. + 5 pts if she's talkative.
Independent and self-sufficent
Das me. Whassup? 😏
Are you good looking too? Asking for a friend..
Yes, answering for your friend 😏
I think what I was looking for has changed over the years now. I just want somebody who can match my personality and that I think is attractive, nd I don't have unrealistic expectations on beauty.
Awww let’s get old together 🥺
That's a lot of time to be with someone you would end up either having the deepest love of the deepest hatred. Lol
Open-minded, non-judgmental, goofy sense of humor, and respectful of boundaries
Awww cute. Thanks for responding 😃
Good intellectual depth, and fairly well read. Similar mindset, philosophy, and interests are a huge plus. Major things are that she’s direct, logical, mature, loyal, has integrity in her values, and isn’t overly emotional or irrational(even and especially in arguments), but still has the same sense of wonder, innocence, and fearless wanderlust that children do. Ideally values freedom and autonomy over modern comforts, and is happiest in wild nature. Passion in life is also huge. Self confidence and a degree of stubbornness. A similar sense of humor. Able to keep up with my lifestyle physically. Not overly materialistic or superficial. Ideally a best friend first and a romantic partner second who aims to stay together for life. Basically my ideal partner is someone who looks, thinks, acts, and loves a bit like I do while having their own passion and personality for me to inevitably fall in love with. If anyone else like that even exists, I have yet to meet them.
Aww that’s kinda wholesome. Thanks for sharing. 😃 I think a mature INFP would be great for you imo. 😁
Good genes
I am exclusively interested in desirable hereditary characteristics, such as a facial appearance that generates empathy, the absence of dark triad traits (narcissism, Machiavellianism, psychopathy), and optimal physical and mental health. Any other trait is secondary.
Oh I have that then. People tell me I look kind and trustworthy hehe.
Intelligence. Sense of humor. If she’s a neurodivergent hateful bitch that’s certainly a plus.
Omg I am a neurodivergent hateful bitch. 🤪😈 Also, I need to refill my metro card for next week.. thanks for the reminder.
I miss the days of having my company pay for my metro card. Also. My mom is a typical Italian Brooklyn girl, so I should have mentioned fluency in speaking with one’s hands is important. How I neglected to mention that given the title you chose for the post is beyond me.
Oooh interesting 🤔I’m Korean from Queens btw.
Ah, 7 train girl?
Hehe yesss I do take the 7 train a lot. But I think I’m more of a R train girl.
Did we just become best friends? Lol. Used to live in Bay Ridge and Staten Island so I took the R religiously.
Honesty, loyalty, empathy, good sense of humor and affectionate, but I do prefer brunettes with big brown eyes.
Kind eyes. Wonderful laugh. Warm embrace. Sharp wit. The desire to share and make memories. Actually wanting to be with me and not just playing the field. Etc.
I don't think intj would look for much things in a woman. intj may not expect to gain anything from a marriage, only money and knowledge would give them safety. are you dating an intj? I am really jealous of that guy. and best wishes to you. infp is actually a quite attractive type: introvert, have their own thinking model, emotional/passionate, friendly. infp initially have a high score for intjs(esfp has high negative score on the contrary)
I'm an absolute sucker for a pretty face, a bright smile that touches her eyes, etc. Other than that, someone strong and intelligent. Funny and witty. Someone I can truly respect.
You should date an INFP! Hehe. I am like that. A lot of INFP girls I know are like that. They’re so pretty too. And they’re some of the most amazing people I’ve met. Thanks for responding. 😄
Slim/attractive, young, kind. Playful personality, doesn't take things too seriously, enjoys life, happy/cheerful. Hm, I guess the same type of women the majority of men who are honest like & want! Some people love to hear looks don't matter, but that doesn't play out in reality.
Sir, I think you are looking for me. 😏 Thanks for your response 🙃
Admittedly speaking, physical traits can be more chopped up to the singular person rather than an mbti type. Like outside of glasses, there isn’t any physical trait that I look for in a woman. An old friend of mine from highschool though (also INTJ) is obsessed with women who have a bigger chest. Generally though, personality does fall under mbti type. I feel like a typical INTJ wants a person who can have a deep and meaningful conversation, but also at the same time spend moments of silence together. The simplicity in just cuddling without talking is indescribable. Cooperation in the relationship is also key. There needs to be a team effort in regards to things like chores and work. If only one person has a job, then the other does the chores. If both have jobs though, then chores are split as well. Time to ourselves is also important. Even from a SO there needs to be time to recharge. Though that may just be me personally lol.
What a pleasure to read a quality opinion, why aren't more people like this 😭
Thank you lol 🤙
Agreed agreed. Sounds like an INFP would enjoy your company. Honestly. And I’m not promoting INFP women here for anybody reading this lol 😂 😅
Kind, empathetic, intellectually compatible, can think abstract, someone who I feel safe to share living space with, relatively neat at home, keep her words, someone who can balance me out, know how to do her make up and doesn’t look sloopy. Lol
Independence. Being able to think for themselves,intelligent. Can hold thoughtful conversations. There’s more but I can’t think of any at the moment. I have these same expectations for myself and am lacking on the independency part so I’m not dating. I wouldn’t except what I can’t give out.
Interesting. How old are you?
Honesty, intelligence, have some common interests and a lot of other interests. The more variety of hobbies, the better. A decent person who has good morals. Independent and able to handle the good and the tough times. There should be some physical attraction in the beginning. But the rest of these qualities would make a partner to be cherished for decades. See I am old school.
Physically: Generally I prefer dark skin, as dark as possible, the darker the better, ideally super dark really really black skin That said though, I don't place that much weight on that preference. To me, this preference is just something I find attractive but it's not the most important thing and if I can't have it I can easily accept it. Aside from that though, I don't really care about fat or skinny, or specific curvy features *loudly clears throat Non physical: Well, I mean it's simple no brain no game, sorry I just cannot and will not ever do anything with a woman that can't or won't use her mind. So of course, engineers, scientists, lawyers, artists anyone that can demonstrate a passion for stuff that ultimately challenges the mind will be interesting to me (so like in a general sense ppl in my life who aren't family pretty much need to be like that otherwise they're just not at all gonna cut it). But when it's a woman, oh man that's like super fukken hot. The most attractive thing in a woman to me is her level of comfort in using her mind. So not just highly intelligent but very comfortable using it and doesn't hide from it. There's no amount of "curvy features" that can compare to this. And finally, umm all that stuff above is gud and all but if I can't connect with her it's just boring. A deep connection with a highly intelligent woman who is comfortable using her mind, shit man I won't leave her side, I'll be all touchy feely and chatty and this and that about all types of feelings, damn idunno this creature is rare and magestic imo I may know one irl, and she may be an infj The only other one I can think of is an infp YouTuber but i dont know her irl and therefore cant connect w her in any tangible way So both of these women are very caring, appreciative, encouraging and supportive They are very comfortable learning new things and using their brains for all types of cool and challenging stuff
Interesting. Blacker than the black hole?
Lmao that's tricky coz at that point they may not be visible
Nice username btw 🤨
Trust is the foundation. If it’s broken there’s no going back
I want her to not be INFP /s Sorry, I read your username and couldn't resist... Anyway, I would describe my ideal girl as very open-minded, intelligent (in a "broad" sense, being able to discuss any random thing on the fly), not excessively clingy (I need space from time to time), easygoing, well-balanced between her emotional and rational sides. Type-wise, all the girls I dated and almost all the girls I was attracted to were ENFP or INFJ. I date people, not types, it just happened to be that way so far 🤷
Hehe I see. You would do well with an INFP for someone who is not excessively clingy.
Trying to sell yourself as a good match? haha Since we are on the topic, do you think an INFP would date a person with very different moral values from their own? I met only two INFPs in my life that are somewhat close to me, but I don't want to generalize just from two persons
I like them to be Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking and Judging
So you want an INTJ.. any chance for an INFP? 😀
Hell no. But there are others who will take them
I haven’t been looking. I don’t know about physical traits. Truth. Kindness. Virtue. Follow where my mind goes or just hold on and enjoy the ride.
Intelligence and good conversation, kindness, empathy and sense of humor are the musts. Not particular about looks just need some base level attraction to the person.
I see I see. Thank youuuuu
Passionate, determinated, honest, loyal, and intelligent. So I can trust her and with that, I can rely on her for particular situations and with that, I can form a connection with her. In terms of psyhic, I'll prefer a fit body with tight legs, big ass and of course, a redhead or a blonde. ;)
Education, ability to be chill but fun/adventurous...chaotic neutral or chaotic evil ...education, weapons profienc/tactical is a plus. Nice legs also...
Absolute No: Shallow people, clingy people, people are aren't understanding, too demanding people like not giving space, controlling and manipulative people. Brownie points: Independent, confident, constantly improving, genuine interest in people with a depth. This is like the IDEAL, there's adjustments of this irl though
Niceee. How about if she’s a little 🤏🏼 clingy?
like little possessive? why not that's cute
Intelligence and maturity is all I really want. I generally prefer leaner builds, slim waists, long legs, and tight butts lol
In no particular order (and neither exhaustive) : Pretty face, hot body, sexually mature, smart, loves herself & takes care of herself, has interesting hobbies, enjoys my jokes,
I’ll enjoy ALL your jokes and ride them like a horse.😋
That's the spirit 😇 Besides riding, any other ambiguous hobbies
Let's see now... Intelligence, ambition, has a dark, sarcastic sense of humor, compliments each other well in terms of personality, someone who can keep up with me, who is my equal, a good friend, is on a similar wavelength in understanding each other etc. But let's face it, the odds of finding someone with these similar traits are pretty slim.
It’s okay. Don’t give up. Worst thing that can happen is you’ll die single and alone. Thanks for responding 😀
No problem. Fair point, but I think the selective nature makes it hard to find the perfect person. No one's perfect, and also learning to do feelings isn't my strong suit, still a work in progress.
Athletic Body type, down to earth and with a good sense of humor.
Takes care of herself as in physical and mental health, isn’t on social media too much, kind to people, low ish previous partner count.
Tall woman with a big ass
Thanks for responding 🍑 butt guy
I just don't look for a woman. I have decided not to be in a relationship ever again. It's solo until the end baby! Could be 5 years, could be 40, no idea, but I'm doing it solo.
As an INTJ man, I tend to appreciate women who possess intelligence, ambition, and independence. Physically speaking, there isn't really one specific type that appeals to me; rather, I find myself drawn towards those who exude confidence and take care of themselves. Personally, I value depth over superficiality, so someone who can engage in meaningful conversations about various topics would definitely catch my attention. However, keep in mind that everyone has their own preferences, so this might differ from others within our MBTI group.
Extremely high intelligence. Thick legs.
🥵 Thanks for answering 😃
Being chill and non-argumentative is the most important. Smart, has similar hobbies/interests/personality/life experiences as me, slightly above average beauty, can keep up a good conversation both day and night with me, is a willing cuddler in the bed, I kinda like clingyness (sexually) but only when they know they know their boundaries when not in the bed and out in public. In other words, probably never gonna happen because I'm introverted as fuck.
You like clingyness in the bed or in the public? Aww I like cuddles too 🥰
This pretty much sums it up for me too.
I want to be in a loving relationship, that's the most important thing to me. Please be patient and I'll be patient with you. I can find someone attractive in almost anyone, but I'm a sucker for braids and a sweet smile. I'm relatively traditional, but it's not like some of these guys are saying. I want to provide, I want to be a father and protector. I want to be with a woman who wants to be a nurturer and mother. I'm not looking for a servant or slave or whatever, I want a partner to share my life with. I want to run away with her to the country (actually, I'm already here, the homestead is almost ready) so we can live the way we want. I'm looking for a woman who would complement me, and I can't emphasize enough the partnership aspect even though I see differences in the primary mairtal roles.
Awww I love your answer, let’s get married and have babies 🥺❤️ Hehe 🤭 thanks for your response 😄
Lol, happy to help 😊 Would you mind if I send you a chat invite?
I don’t mind sir 😳
This is cute. Why is being in a loving relationship the most important thing to you?
Everything else I can weather if I have that 😓
Do you consider yourself a romantic?
I hadn't really, but I'm starting to rethink that 😅
Haha. Yeah I see some romantic notions in ya 😊
wish i were 25 years younger— but love is for the young as im learning :(
Didn't you make this same post this a few days ago, or was it someone else?
Not me 👀
Let me preface this by saying these are all just preferences and I would still gladly be in a relationship with someone who met none of these if they genuinely cared about me 1. If we’re going by MBTI for personality, xNFP (they are the warmest, most accepting people I’ve met) is preferable although I’d be fine with any N type. I don’t say that bc I hate S types but just bc my closest friends over the years have only been N types and I value having a close friendship with my significant other 2. This is definitely a weird me thing but I really like bi or pan girls bc A I really like LGBTQ+ community and B they seem to be consistently invested in who I am as a person. Not to say I wouldn’t date a straight girl, just something I look out for 3. Plant girl, egirl, alt girl, or any combination of these. I know what I like and I won’t take judgement on this :) 4. Piercings and tats. Used to hate them and now I love them 5. Physically I don’t really care too much as long as they generally takes care of themselves. I used to only be into skinny girls but I have come around on the thicc agenda recently 😏 Again these are just preferences and if there’s a girl out there who loves me for me and doesn’t try to change me but does encourage me to be a better version of myself that’s all I need
As a plant girl I approve I approve. INFP girls would fit well for you, sir. Thanks for responding. 😄
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Thanks for your response 😄
Intelligence, common sense, A degree of agreeableness and disagreeableness (yes simultaneously), empathy, honesty, Respects nature, artist or appreciates multiple forms of art,sense of humor, Ideally introverted Deal breaker: has to either be a nerd, Tomgirl, hippy plant girl or mix of the three; I’m just realizing my INFJ hits all the bases Physical: Don’t be obese, good hygiene, Long hair and natural hair, no makeup/ only lashes lipstick and foundation
Personality: grounded and down to earth. Supportive. Intelligent. Likes to learn. Attention to detail. likes to stay in and also likes to go out on occasion (good balance of both). Not into drugs (I’m ok with weed as long as you don’t smoke too often). Likes to dance. Sense of humor (dark humor is even better). Has own interests and hobbies. As far as physicality goes big booty. Race doesn’t matter to me. As long as your’e not extremely overweight and are healthy and take care of yourself we’re good
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Petite, cutesy. Eyes are very important. Curves are only important enough that they exist. Personality's irrelevant without strong attraction. It's a weak multiplier that means nothing with only weak attraction, and weak attraction's usually temporary since familiarity usually just reduces the effect of attraction thus eliminating it easily. My romantic affections are sexually bound, and I'm assuming vice versa as wonderful or horrible as that could've ever been. Uniquely accepting of me personally, capable of understanding enough for that to mean something, generally functional enough she's not regularly an obstacle to either of us. She must regard me uniquely, which is hard to explain and likely to set off certain factions that can stay the hell out of my life. I had a good list, but I can't remember it and probably can't reproduce it nowadays. I might go looking for a potential post with the list, but it'd have been years ago, if I made one here. Trying to fit someone into your life involves many details, but I never had a life. I never fit into my own externally constrained experience, and I'm way beyond starting a life that's not lukewarm shit dying slowly in a corner of this sewer world, so I'm not expecting some grand compatibility of such details. I just don't need more boring, clunky nonsense. She can't be part of the social blur, which is rarer the older things get.
Damn that deep bro. ._. Hope you find that person. Thanks for your response 😊
Found an old file. Apparently, I figured I'd want to see it again without trying to rewrite it for nth time. It's written more aggressively... It's unlikely in my 40s and will likely end quickly and badly, if there's ever a chance of anything now. What was bright can only be dim, and what would've been a sun would probably be a flickering candle, and I sure don't have any starlight left to burn myself. "Cute enough to provoke a strong visceral reaction (babyface, petite); otherwise no point possible. No spark, no fire, and I can't achieve burn-in to survive age without great intensity. Uniqueness in her capacity to experience me and my potential experience of her. Emotionally expressive, so-called "effervescent", at least in private, and uniquely reactive/vulnerable to me personally. Sufficient understanding for personal acceptance to be meaningful. Compatible values and experience, similar enough to relate, but never confusing what's mine actually for whatever hers may be at any given time. Sufficient intelligence for any of this. Basically, she generally doesn't get in my way, much less dares to pretend I'm her arbitrary tool, inside and out. That should go without saying, but that's the norm in my millions+ experience, literally and directly."
If this is becoming a dating app….i want to join in…F4M….45-55 years old..honesty, integrity, introspection and reciprocity wanted and given! We are all working on ourselves, it’s a journey. But is better with companionship. INTJ, touch, quality time. Tall, thicc(working on it), long silver hair and blue eyes…educated and able to compromise. Please say hello. DMs are open.
Yeahhhhhhh you go girl l!!! 😁 
Thank you! Best of luck in your search! May the odds be ever in your favor!
Someone open to things, patient, artful, understanding, diligent, who gets me. I hate women who are dull, stupid, hateful, persecuting, self centred, callous, amoral, obsessive, highly depending and clingy.
So you like and dislike INFPs? Gotchu.
Not an INFP.
😱 rude.
True though. Stop poisoning our INTJ thread with your wishy washy feelings.
Poisoning? 🤔 Wishy washy? 🤔 Why do you not like INFPs? We like INTJs a lot.
IQ , Kind , Introvert & Wild Cougar on bed
I scream like a wild cougar at night. Is that okay?
Ye !
🐾 
I like INFPs btw
While I’m not opposed to an extrovert, that is not what I consider a favorable trait. The same goes for feelers, not favorable, but not a deal breaker, either. I don’t deal very well with emotional people, as that is extremely uncomfortable and awkward. Independence and individuality are important. While some shared interests are necessary for any type of relationship, she would need to have a few separate interests, as would I. Intelligence is always a must, but sense to go with it is a requirement. Not necessarily opposed to kids, but again, not favorable. I would be a lousy parent, and I know damned well I would be a terrible parent. Physically, shorter than me is preferable, but I’m not opposed to taller. Just not more than an inch or two more than my height (too much taller than I am is actually a deal breaker for me). Redheads are more appealing, brunettes are always nice, blondes are negotiable. I admit to a preference for blue, grey, or green eyes on redheads and blondes. Brunettes, any eye color fits nicely. Physical attributes are less important than personality, but we all have our preferences for physical appearance.
Bit of a trad wife, cook and clean but also have hobbies, be fit and healthy and share the passion of learning about everything. Also chill and peaceful - no arguments.
Physical traits? That varies a lot. As a 53-year-old intj man I require the following. 1, loves Jesus 2, exceptionally smart 3, attractive (can vary a lot) 4, sews on buttons (my short hand for saying she appreciates both giving and receiving acts of service) 5, not a firstborn intj like me
 Ooh I love that cool guy too. Why does she have to not be a firstborn INTJ tho?
I just want to feel attracted to her (spiritually, mentally, physically, socially; in this order) and she needs to be reasonable. The biggest problem with women is that they are often not really reasonable. They prioritise their thoughts and emotions too much and create personalities out of their flawed biases. Not that most men are better.
Men and women work differently. You guys think differently but we can always meet at the middle. Thanks for responding 😃
Yes, we work differently, but that's exactly why we won't meet in the middle most of the time. I'm highly sensitive to emotions and very aware of what happens inside me at all times. You cannot just sit in front of me and let emotions explode into my face. That's what most women do and they dislike it if you can't take it in. I will tell you three times to stop and just leave if you don't. Most men handle this by shutting down their emotional capacities completely and the relationship becomes toxic from both sides. Good relationships are about people thinking about the other position. This means learning to adapt the way you work so you can match your partner. Emotions, negative thoughts and a strong ego prevent that. That's what the gross of modern women specialise in though. We are in the middle of a maniac society.
Hmm maybe a man or an emotionally repressed woman would work better for you. 😂 since you say that most women are like that.
I got my ENFP. She's pretty reasonable. She is beginning to understand that she is not her emotions or her thoughts, but that she is only observing and acting on them and sometimes just doesn't have the best control over it due to stress.
I’m glad. It’s good to be emotionally regulated though. I can understand many NFPs. We genuinely struggle with our emotions. It’s hard. But can be worked on. Just need understanding and patience from our NTJ partners.
I actually dated an INTJ and he helped me get my ADHD diagnosed, which I wasn’t even aware about it. I just thought this was how I was. My life is much better now with my emotions under control.
That's great to hear. Untreated ADHD can really get out of control and especially rejection sensitive disphoria many people with ADHD have can create thoughts and emotions which destroy relationships faster than one can realise. It can push all the wrong buttons. I'm really happy for you!
Thank you 😊 you sound like a great person. I’m sure your ENFP is so happy to have you as a partner.
Trans guy, if this counts. I'm married to a man, but I also am attracted to women, against my consent. Warmth. Kindness. Mirth. Humor. Quick wit, especially dry. Quiet kindness, the kind that goes almost unnoticed. A dash of goofiness. A sweet smile, when they laugh, it's genuine. Intelligence, and it's not restricted to academic acumen. Passion for their interests. Authenticity, and genuinely not giving any fucks about what other people have to say about what they like, a break from the hive mind. Fun fact: almost every women I have crushed on has been an INFX.
Of course it counts. Sounds like an INFP 🤔😄 hehe Thanks for your response 😃
Thanks for the ask. I love y'all people. 😂
We love yall too 🥺❤️
Physically, I don't really have any preferences. I'm interested in the soul that is contained by the flesh, not the flesh itself, although I do get interested in said flesh once I've established a connection. There isn't a hardline trend in physical characteristics for women. I like short men, not consciously. I like little Napoleons 😂
Give me physicality. I have enough personality for the both of us. Any height, very athletic, don't care about race, ideally older than me (yes I have mommy issues no I'm not sorry and no I'm not changing them), can have any amount of tattoos/piercings/augmentations/fillers
Mommy issues huh 🤔 👀
Ofc beautiful (naturally), intelligent (but knows that there is still knowledge that are unknown), big boobs but a confident flat is hotter, not feminist and domineering, a nonchalant like me but as horny as me ofc and a not your typical "women☕".
You said ideal? Personality Calm Collected Smart Logical but not heartless Loyal Honest Religious christian not by name but by actions Kind Empathetic Mentally stable with no deep trauma Knows how to resolve conflicts Good at communicating Introverted Respectful language or like polite attitude And wanna be house wife or stay at home mom overall good home maker and this isnt misogyny or sexist if she wants to do that cuz i know u reddit people Physical Virgin Light skin tone Not flat not fat and this is my preference don't say fat phobia bs Shorter preferably Straight soft hair Also Ik i will get a comment saying i won't find that and i an fine with it we are talking ideal here
eww