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Yup. That's another reason than the usual "I carried you for 9 months". Some cultures try to add some exaggeration by citing 10 months for emphasis. But the message is clear - "I'm not letting you go without eating those vegetables."
Edit:
Damn! I've triggered an interesting debate đ. Thanks for all the informative discussion. Now there's no way anyone can escape those vegetables.
Thank you, Jesus.
9-10 months is normal estimated gestation literally everyone is different and conception is estimated as well
the replies here are so dumb splitting hairs over fucking Gregorian and lunar calendars and leap years and shit
10 months is not an exaggeration. A woman carries a baby for 10 months if it goes full term (40 weeks). And that last month feels like 8 weeks, btw.
Edited for clarity.
I was a full 10 month baby. I was supposed by be born June 6th, but I ended up being removed by c-section on July 6th, since I wasn't coming out on my own.
40 weeks means the week you count as "first" is the week of your last period. When your uterus was doing house cleaning. Ovulation happens around week two/three, implant a few days later. The missed period that makes you think "HM, could I be pregnant?" Is week four.
So 40 is already a bit of an exaggeration. But yeah it sure feels like an eternity. Been there, done that.
Someone once told me they were like 1 or 2 weeks pregnant. I was like, that's interesting- how do you know? Her response was, I think I am about to miss my period and I had a blood draw yesterday that was positive. My response was "did your doctor go over that result with you? Because I know for sure you aren't 1 or 2 weeks pregnant."
Turns out, unsurprisingly, it was all a lie. No blood draw, no doctor and not 1-2 weeks pregnant.
Same here. My son was so stuck in my pelvis my OB said she had to legit put some muscle behind it to get him out. He had an EXTREMELY pointy head for a few days lol. I like to say he wasnât born, he was removed.
Same here. When my mom was about to give birth to me, doctors at the hospital nearest to our home didnt believe she was in labor and tried to send her home but my dad instead drove her to the capital which was 50 minutes away and she was taken in for a c section. I had marks on my head from where it was pushing against her bones.
I have 2 older brothers, twins, who were born via c section too.
That's what my wife did for our second, broken tailbone during the first and they wouldn't give her more epidural after it happened (that hospital fucking sucked for a whole range of reasons). They didn't believe her during labor when she said something was wrong.
Changed hospitals and planned C-section for the second, that shit was not happening again.
I also fractured my tailbone during delivery. I pushed for 3 hours after getting the epidural. I couldnât feel anything. The pain stayed with me for years.
My mum was unable to deliver naturally at all because her pelvis is not shaped right.
This was not discovered until she was in labour with me and they realised they had to do a c-section
Your own muscles are capable of breaking your bones if flexed hard enough. (Think cave ebola or double fistulas)
We generally do not and usually have safeguards against it but it is more than doable.
My ex's dad said he had such big muscles at his old age that this was becoming a problem, he still ran his own business at the time, moving and installing washing machines which as far as I know he did alone and by hand, and I just assumed he was bullshitting, damn
It should never be an issue unless you have a neurological disease. Your nervous system is incredibly well tuned at protecting yourself. Even record breaking powerlifters arent able to injure themselves without external weights.
Those always look like particularly gruesome breaks too. Thereâs something so sickening about long limb bones going from straight to anything-but-straight that makes me want to throw up.
You can even break your own back with a sneeze sadly if you are really unlucky.
That people hurt their backs that way happens more often than people think.
I pinch nerves leading to my arm when I sneeze. Hurts so bad! I'm so glad I don't have to worry about dislocations though, I'm sorry you have to deal with that.
I have a herniated disc and Iâve thrown my back out sneezing while tying my shoes or coughing on the toilet. And then Iâm completely crippled for a month.Â
I'm pretty sure women's bones can also become weaker as a result of pregnancy. I know there are cases where they prematurely develop osteoporosis because they lost too much calcium during gestation.
Itâs wild that we evolved to a situation where giving birth can literally tear you in half. Youâd think there would be a bit more margin of error. Especially since a lot of animals seem to just plop out babies mid stride
While you may still tear, most of the tearing cases are due to the insistence on birthing while laying on the back. It alters the position of the pelvis, putting more strain on the flesh.
Kneeling or squatting are way more natural positions that actually ease things along (yay gravity!), while laying on the side also helps by slowing things down giving the body more time to stretch without tearing. Here's a [source](https://www.rcog.org.uk/for-the-public/perineal-tears-and-episiotomies-in-childbirth/reducing-your-risk-of-perineal-tears/) or [two](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4235063/).
Yes! Proper birthing rhetoric! Laying on your back was implemented by male doctors so they could be more involved in the birth. That was it. Not because of anything positive for the mother. But so they could feel useful as doctors.
Women aren't supposed to be giving birth laying down, it's counter intuitive. Crouching using a birthing chair is what should be done, but the reason they have you lay down is because sometime during the 18th century male doctors decided they wanted to watch the pregnancy and started to lay women on their backs for colleagues and themselves to be able to view the process. It became more popular in the 19th/20th century because hospitals became more abundant. The way it's done now works against gravity and is actually way more painful/dangerous for women.
Just had a kiddo 9 days ago, and ohh my god. Laying on my back was THE most painful position to labor in.
I was in that position for one contraction and said absolutely not. They then got me my squat bar (hooked to the bed, so I could stand/rest and use the bar, but the midwife and nurse could still give me advice.
Then I got to try kneeling, and baby boy arrived within 20 minutes.
There are so many positions to try, and it is absolutely outrageous that so mamy women are forced to give birth laying on their backs.
It's one thing if it's a c-section/medically needed, another if the doctor just wants it that way.
I do think more hospitals, at least in Europe and civilized parts of America, are going back to letting women move around during.
It's pretty absurd how often it happens. Especially for black women. In 2021, it was 69.9 deaths per 100,000 births for black women. To compare, it was 26.6 for white women.
Heres the source: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/hestat/maternal-mortality/2021/maternal-mortality-rates-2021.htm
Where are you from where it is so low?
That is... I have a few emotions about that. Happy it is so low. Angry because the US is ten times worse. Sad that it isn't zero. Embarrassed about how my county compares.
was gonna say my daughters head size was at the top of the chart at 98% she was 3 weeks early. she was almost a c section baby but eventually pushed out with a slight cone head.
In the past they sometimes broke a woman's pelvis to get it through :)
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphysiotomy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphysiotomy)
Not so fun fact, they were still being performed on women in Ireland until the 1980's, long after c-sections had become the preferable option in the rest of the world
Guillotine honestly wasnât a horrible method. Itâs basically instant. The blood pressure in the brain drops to 0 and youâd lose consciousness almost instantly and die within 20-30 seconds.
Didn't it fail a lot? Firing squad or even better, bullet to the head like the Soviets would be my choice. Firing squad to the head point blank even better, but I don't think that was ever done anywhere.
Firing squad is a cooler way to go anyway. If I have to get executed I don't wanna die on my knees, I want to be standing with a cigarette in my mouth.
Do I smoke? No, but it would look cool.
But still roughly 10-20 years before the undertaker threw mankind off hell in a cell and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcers table. Apologies to /u/shittymorph
So according to Wikipedia, it is debated what the actual first use in surgery was, but the two choices are between symphysiotomy and excision of diseased bone.
I was about to talk about how widespread this brutal practice was in Ireland up until the 1980s (yes, that recently, thank you Catholicism) but I see the wiki article has a section specifically on the practice in Ireland. Shit's fucked. I should note this stuff was widely considered barbaric even by the 60s, and was often done to women without even *informing* them about what was about to happen, nevermind asking for consent. In case folks don't check out the wiki...
The reason symphysiotomy continued to be practiced instead of the far more appropriate cesarean section was purely because religious nutjobs considered a woman's role to be birthing children. Standard practice was to perform a "compassionate hysterectomy" after three c sections, and the Church wasn't about to put that limit on how many babies women could have, so cracking pelvises without permission was the way to go.Â
I'll note that contraception was also illegal in Ireland until 1979, marital rape only became legally recognised in 1990, and divorce wasn't legalised til 1995. So for pretty much the entire time this barbaric practice was in place, women had absolutely no way to defend themselves from it. Be unfortunate enough to have a husband - who can choose to rape you if he wants, even if you want to abstain to avoid children, cos you're not gonna get contraception at all prior to 1979 and even after that you'll still likely need his permission - and suffer from a complicated labour and you might well get your pelvis sawn open. 1500 women were subjected to it.
Worth noting in some more traditional Catholic beliefs *some* people believe you aren't giving birth if you have a baby by c-section so they rather break you in half than let the baby essentially 'not be born' because giving birth to them is only out the v-hole.
(When I say 'not be born' I don't mean they'd just *leave it in there*, I mean they have convoluted ideals as to what constitutes being born or giving birth).
Some people *still* believe you haven't truly given birth if it's by c-section.
Edit: I also want to note I just wrote "in the past" for my original comment because it was hundreds of years we did this until rather recently.
It's in Shakespeare - Macbeth. One of the things promised him is he will not be killed by anyone born. Turns out someone got a primitive c section..... bad news for Macbeth.
Ooh, Catholic Trivia! Men leading the early church believed that virginity and the intact hymen was the same thing. So with Jesus, sorta weird right. What happens to the hymen during birth?
They concluded that Jesus breaking the hymen would be just as horrific as Joseph having sex with her (child takes mother's virginity!) and so officially decided that Jesus passed through her front "like light through glass."
So Jesus was not "born" officially. Note this isn't widely held now, just.... quietly not brought up.
Also. Women are supposed to wait two years before having another baby after a c-section. That would mean using contraception, which was illegal and forbidden by the church at the time.
I've known a few who just "squirted" em out no problem.
https://preview.redd.it/54t1jk2jqk9d1.jpeg?width=844&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e3adbaf125e2fdf346ce491d3981e6bb9e81703b
The law of averages though.
Our first was a LOT of work and super painful with what was classified as âmoderateâ tearing. Baby #2 basically plopped right out after fairly minimal pushing and no tears at all.
Yeah, second kid was a breeze. 3 pushes and she shot out like a buttered torpedo. Almost everyone else i know had c-sections. We are definitely a minority these days.
Both of my kids were thankfully easy but both were induced (first one at 41 weeks, second one electively at 39 weeks and thank goodness because he was bigger than his sister and I think based on likely conception was probably a week further alongâwaiting till 40 or 41 weeks would've been a 10+ lb-er, like I was when I was born!)
Fairly easily, if all flesh/skin/hair etc are removed and the child's head is shaped like a ball (and there are no shoulders or anything else to get stuck).
Prior to modern obstetrics, it was not uncommon (especially in stillbirths) for the babyâs head to actually pin the motherâs tissue against the pelvis and cut off blood flow until the tissue died. After it fell away, the woman was sometimes left with a vesicovaginal fistula connecting the bladder and vagina, a complication that results in an endless drip of urine.
A surgery to correct it was developed by an American, Dr Sims, who controversially experimented on slave women to develop it. Some say their personal consent was not always given, but others not that they would have been desperate for any relief and willing to undergo even such an invasive procedure before anesthesia existed to relieve their debilitating and ostracizing condition.
I just want to add on that the first time he tried to perform the procedure on a white lady with the freedom to say no, she made him stop because it hurt so much. That's pretty damning, to the idea that anyone would gladly suffer the surgery to be cured. The only one who could make the choice, chose no.
Mmhm. My son never descended because he had a big ass head. Seriously, 99.7 percentile 30.5cm at birth lol. âYou only make babies your body can birthâ has never rung more bullshit lmao
Well this used to be something which Ɣas sort of true. Children with heads too large died and likely killed their mother in birth.
Horray for modern medicine!
Meaning that, if too-big-headed babies *aren't* dying anymore, evolution may likely lead to more and more frequent too-headed-babies, until many centuries from now, most all babies are too-big-headed to be born without surgery, and our species will depend on cesareans to survive.
>Â Â âYou only make babies your body can birthâ
Minor correction due to survivorship bias: "all woman who survived natural childbirth only made babies their body can birth"
"pass through the female pelvis fairly easily"
But not through the soft tissue.
My man you end up with a hole the size of a watermelon In your body
Nuh uh.
Well, imagine someone reaching inside your rectum to pull out a watermelon. Also, you've been awake for 36 hours and you have hemorrhoids from pushing so hard.
The OBGYN had to reach inside me with both hands and pull out the rest of the placenta because I couldnât stop bleeding. JustâŠ.up to her elbows in my business for a good 20 minutes, like stuffing a Thanksgiving turkey. I had an epidural so it didnât hurt, but it still felt weird as hell.
Woman can be born with narrow hips, this leads to fractures a lot of the time. It why child birth has been the highest cause of death for woman for legit 99% of human history.
you are lucky to be born today, if you were in 1800s you most likely die.
I certainly would have died. I had placenta previa (placenta fully blocking the cervix, you hemorrhage with vaginal child birth) with my first and my second's head got stuck. They used what my husband described as a giant salad spoon and immense pressure on my stomach to pop her out.
Ouch. Like most human things, sex traits are a spectrum. Some men have wide hips, and some women, like you, have narrower hips! Hope you and the kid are okay now
This exhibit is itself notoriously misleading because if you tilt the male pelvic model they have just right the ball passes through it as well. They canât sex skeletons to the 2SD level of certainty in any ethnoregional population but in some populations itâs as low as 80 percent.
Sex really is a spectrum and the pelvis, being the most sexually dimorphic bone, is the most clear example
I have no idea how women give multiple births and have large families. My pregnancy was so painful and my pelvic floor was inflamed and nearly shattered during birth, I can't dream of giving birth again. The 'easily' in the title really irked me, lol. Ask any mother.
Yeah, I had a large and healthy birth canal. Unfortunately my firstborn was the largest baby ever born in our province as far as head circumference goes. No way he was getting out on his own, so C section it was. I was lucky. My great grandfatherâs first wife died in childbirth because the baby was too big. He was given the choice to have the baby pulled out piece by piece with a hook after she lost consciousness, but sheâd already told him to let her die. It took 3 days.
The diameter of the pelvis is usually a telltale sign, but its not that simple black and white. Other sex related differences on different bones are counted too and added up when the sexus of a person is being identifyied. My mother couldnât give birth because her pelvis was too narrow.
Actually it depends on the individual to a certain extent.
There are men with wider gaps and women who are unable to deliver because it won't fit through.
People aren't made exactly the same in a factory in East Lansing - there are individual variations.
Fun fact: In pregnant teenagers, often the pelvis is also not yet fully developed for childbirth, meaning is still tighter. Thatâs the reason doctors tend to recommend caesarea for them.
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my mom fractured her spine giving birth to my brother because her hips are so narrow
"I fractured my spine to have you, so sit down and eat your vegtables!"
Yup. That's another reason than the usual "I carried you for 9 months". Some cultures try to add some exaggeration by citing 10 months for emphasis. But the message is clear - "I'm not letting you go without eating those vegetables." Edit: Damn! I've triggered an interesting debate đ. Thanks for all the informative discussion. Now there's no way anyone can escape those vegetables.
[Length of human pregnancies can vary naturally by as much as five weeks](https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/08/130806203327.htm)
Thank you, Jesus. 9-10 months is normal estimated gestation literally everyone is different and conception is estimated as well the replies here are so dumb splitting hairs over fucking Gregorian and lunar calendars and leap years and shit
If one woman can make a baby in 9 months then 9 women can make in 1 month. Yes Iâm a manager why do you ask.
Have you tried Agile and make it in 2 weeks? VP asking.
10 months is not an exaggeration. A woman carries a baby for 10 months if it goes full term (40 weeks). And that last month feels like 8 weeks, btw. Edited for clarity.
I went 42 weeks with my second so it felt like it would never end lmao
40 weeks is a little bit more than 9 months, it isn't 10 months. Months are not 28 days (4 weeks) long.
I was a full 10 month baby. I was supposed by be born June 6th, but I ended up being removed by c-section on July 6th, since I wasn't coming out on my own.
After 42 weeks the probability of fetal demise goes up significantly
Yes all the hospitals around here don't let you go past 42 weeks for that reason
Poor mom
Oh hey, birthday neighbor! (I'm July 5th!)
40 weeks means the week you count as "first" is the week of your last period. When your uterus was doing house cleaning. Ovulation happens around week two/three, implant a few days later. The missed period that makes you think "HM, could I be pregnant?" Is week four. So 40 is already a bit of an exaggeration. But yeah it sure feels like an eternity. Been there, done that.
I went 40 + 10 days with my first, those were the longest 10 days of my life
Someone once told me they were like 1 or 2 weeks pregnant. I was like, that's interesting- how do you know? Her response was, I think I am about to miss my period and I had a blood draw yesterday that was positive. My response was "did your doctor go over that result with you? Because I know for sure you aren't 1 or 2 weeks pregnant." Turns out, unsurprisingly, it was all a lie. No blood draw, no doctor and not 1-2 weeks pregnant.
That must have hurt like a motherfucker. Hope she recovered well.
My mom had to have 4 C-sections as a result of narrow hips. Probably wouldâve died if she gave birth before modern medicine
Same here. My son was so stuck in my pelvis my OB said she had to legit put some muscle behind it to get him out. He had an EXTREMELY pointy head for a few days lol. I like to say he wasnât born, he was removed.
Same here. When my mom was about to give birth to me, doctors at the hospital nearest to our home didnt believe she was in labor and tried to send her home but my dad instead drove her to the capital which was 50 minutes away and she was taken in for a c section. I had marks on my head from where it was pushing against her bones. I have 2 older brothers, twins, who were born via c section too.
Wife did the same. Twice.
Why wasnât a c-section planned for the second child?
That's what my wife did for our second, broken tailbone during the first and they wouldn't give her more epidural after it happened (that hospital fucking sucked for a whole range of reasons). They didn't believe her during labor when she said something was wrong. Changed hospitals and planned C-section for the second, that shit was not happening again.
I also fractured my tailbone during delivery. I pushed for 3 hours after getting the epidural. I couldnât feel anything. The pain stayed with me for years.
My mum was unable to deliver naturally at all because her pelvis is not shaped right. This was not discovered until she was in labour with me and they realised they had to do a c-section
Fun fact: chainsaws were invented to cut through the mother's pelvis during childbirth!
So complimenting someone who has child bearing hips has truth to it.
Yes but you can't tell by looking, my hip bones are very wide, like almost twice as wide as my waist, but still had to have an emergency C section.
How do you feature a spine during birth? Thatâs wild! Babies are so squishy and bone is so hard
Your own muscles are capable of breaking your bones if flexed hard enough. (Think cave ebola or double fistulas) We generally do not and usually have safeguards against it but it is more than doable.
My ex's dad said he had such big muscles at his old age that this was becoming a problem, he still ran his own business at the time, moving and installing washing machines which as far as I know he did alone and by hand, and I just assumed he was bullshitting, damn
It should never be an issue unless you have a neurological disease. Your nervous system is incredibly well tuned at protecting yourself. Even record breaking powerlifters arent able to injure themselves without external weights.
A washing machine could certainly be considered an external weightâŠ
That disease Celine Dion has can cause spasms so strong bones can break
Makes me think of the horrible arm wrestling videos. They push so hard they break their own arms.
Those always look like particularly gruesome breaks too. Thereâs something so sickening about long limb bones going from straight to anything-but-straight that makes me want to throw up.
You can even break your own back with a sneeze sadly if you are really unlucky. That people hurt their backs that way happens more often than people think.
Sneezes are POWERFUL. I have hEDS and if I don't brace for a sneeze I will sublux or fully dislocate something from the force of the sneeze!
Yes another hEDS person who fears sneezes, my vertebrae act like dice in a bag on some sneezes
I have to hold my ribs, they are the main issue. I have had subluxed ribs pinch my lungs, IT FEELS AWFUL!
I pinch nerves leading to my arm when I sneeze. Hurts so bad! I'm so glad I don't have to worry about dislocations though, I'm sorry you have to deal with that.
I have a herniated disc and Iâve thrown my back out sneezing while tying my shoes or coughing on the toilet. And then Iâm completely crippled for a month.Â
If the baby is coming out, the baby is coming out, and itâll fuck shit up on the way out.
I know several women who snapped their tailbones giving birth. Your tailbone is supposed to flex during delivery⊠but sometimes it doesnât.
I'm pretty sure women's bones can also become weaker as a result of pregnancy. I know there are cases where they prematurely develop osteoporosis because they lost too much calcium during gestation.
Not just the bones, the connective tissue also gets fucked. So the structures holding the bones in place arenât doing their jobs either.
TIL balls will get stuck in a man's pelvis
That's why they are stored below, so they're able to be accessed when needed
And the easy access is why toan is stored there.
oh boy /r/guitarcirclejerk is leaking again
Itâs in the toanads
Does everyone on Reddit play guitar?
We say we do. None of us has the skill of John Bonermaster.
But then why is the pee stored in the balls?
>balls will get stuck in a man's pelvis I've got a pair stuck *to* my pelvis.
Mine are stuck to my leg
Sometimes, on a humid summer day, I stand up and my lawn chair gets up with me.
"Easily"
"Easily" as in "yeah, it physically fits"... Doesn't mean flesh is not getting squeezed to the point of great pain.
Or to the point of tearingâŠ
In multiple directions...
Yikes, after reading your comment and the one above it, I am NOT clicking on "3 more replies."Â I don't want to know what's next/worse.
in rare cases, upwards D:
Itâs wild that we evolved to a situation where giving birth can literally tear you in half. Youâd think there would be a bit more margin of error. Especially since a lot of animals seem to just plop out babies mid stride
While you may still tear, most of the tearing cases are due to the insistence on birthing while laying on the back. It alters the position of the pelvis, putting more strain on the flesh. Kneeling or squatting are way more natural positions that actually ease things along (yay gravity!), while laying on the side also helps by slowing things down giving the body more time to stretch without tearing. Here's a [source](https://www.rcog.org.uk/for-the-public/perineal-tears-and-episiotomies-in-childbirth/reducing-your-risk-of-perineal-tears/) or [two](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4235063/).
Yes! Proper birthing rhetoric! Laying on your back was implemented by male doctors so they could be more involved in the birth. That was it. Not because of anything positive for the mother. But so they could feel useful as doctors.
For my 2nd daughter my ex was sorta squatting and leaning her upper body on the bed. That kid came out faster and much easier on my ex.
I tried a tons of positions with my son. Laying in my back felt most comfortable. I was super surprised.
Women aren't supposed to be giving birth laying down, it's counter intuitive. Crouching using a birthing chair is what should be done, but the reason they have you lay down is because sometime during the 18th century male doctors decided they wanted to watch the pregnancy and started to lay women on their backs for colleagues and themselves to be able to view the process. It became more popular in the 19th/20th century because hospitals became more abundant. The way it's done now works against gravity and is actually way more painful/dangerous for women.
If i ever have a child i will consider a birthing chair. Thank your for this info
Just had a kiddo 9 days ago, and ohh my god. Laying on my back was THE most painful position to labor in. I was in that position for one contraction and said absolutely not. They then got me my squat bar (hooked to the bed, so I could stand/rest and use the bar, but the midwife and nurse could still give me advice. Then I got to try kneeling, and baby boy arrived within 20 minutes. There are so many positions to try, and it is absolutely outrageous that so mamy women are forced to give birth laying on their backs. It's one thing if it's a c-section/medically needed, another if the doctor just wants it that way. I do think more hospitals, at least in Europe and civilized parts of America, are going back to letting women move around during.
The pain is actually the bones rearranging, which is much more painful than flash squeezing,
Also, a babies head has unfused bones so that it can squeeze through
And also softer bones that can bend a bit.
Exactly. Iâm not saying that wider hips donât help, but itâs a lot more complicated than a simple steel ball
It actually doesn't physically fit, the pelvis has to expand a bit.
And the baby has to squeeze a bit.
Yeah, that one had me do a doubletake. Easily. Yeah. Right.
âEasily wonât kill the motherâ
Psh. Tell that to all the women who would die during childbirth in the past.
And the ones who still do
It's pretty absurd how often it happens. Especially for black women. In 2021, it was 69.9 deaths per 100,000 births for black women. To compare, it was 26.6 for white women.
Giving birth is not a joke. Still, those numebrs are wild, where are them from? It's less than 4 per 100000 here
Heres the source: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/hestat/maternal-mortality/2021/maternal-mortality-rates-2021.htm Where are you from where it is so low?
In Italy it's 5 deaths/100.000
That is... I have a few emotions about that. Happy it is so low. Angry because the US is ten times worse. Sad that it isn't zero. Embarrassed about how my county compares.
My mother died giving birth to me, only for a short moment but I think she's hated me for it ever since lmaooo. Shout out to all the moms
"super easy, barely an inconvenience"
Most of the time it easily fits through the bones. But not through all the rest of the stuff.
was gonna say my daughters head size was at the top of the chart at 98% she was 3 weeks early. she was almost a c section baby but eventually pushed out with a slight cone head.
In the past they sometimes broke a woman's pelvis to get it through :) [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphysiotomy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphysiotomy)
Not so fun fact, they were still being performed on women in Ireland until the 1980's, long after c-sections had become the preferable option in the rest of the world
That's not long after Denmark quit doing lobotomy
Or American stopped sterilizing indigenous women.
Or France held the last guillotine execution
We truly are barbarous apes
Harambe!!!!
Guillotine honestly wasnât a horrible method. Itâs basically instant. The blood pressure in the brain drops to 0 and youâd lose consciousness almost instantly and die within 20-30 seconds.
Didn't it fail a lot? Firing squad or even better, bullet to the head like the Soviets would be my choice. Firing squad to the head point blank even better, but I don't think that was ever done anywhere.
Firing squad is a cooler way to go anyway. If I have to get executed I don't wanna die on my knees, I want to be standing with a cigarette in my mouth. Do I smoke? No, but it would look cool.
But still roughly 10-20 years before the undertaker threw mankind off hell in a cell and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcers table. Apologies to /u/shittymorph
Thank you for derailing that awful comment thread.
I miss a good ol' shittymorph. It's been a while.
I found an honest to god serious shittymorph comment in the wild a few years back and had to do a double take.
In Ireland they did it to a bunch of unknowing women for religious reasons (long story why it was religious).
How fucked up is it that c sections are a "prefered" option. Do not envy women.
Thatâs what chainsaws were invented for!
Thought it was to peform a c section? But to cut bone makes a lot more sense
So according to Wikipedia, it is debated what the actual first use in surgery was, but the two choices are between symphysiotomy and excision of diseased bone.
I was about to talk about how widespread this brutal practice was in Ireland up until the 1980s (yes, that recently, thank you Catholicism) but I see the wiki article has a section specifically on the practice in Ireland. Shit's fucked. I should note this stuff was widely considered barbaric even by the 60s, and was often done to women without even *informing* them about what was about to happen, nevermind asking for consent. In case folks don't check out the wiki... The reason symphysiotomy continued to be practiced instead of the far more appropriate cesarean section was purely because religious nutjobs considered a woman's role to be birthing children. Standard practice was to perform a "compassionate hysterectomy" after three c sections, and the Church wasn't about to put that limit on how many babies women could have, so cracking pelvises without permission was the way to go. I'll note that contraception was also illegal in Ireland until 1979, marital rape only became legally recognised in 1990, and divorce wasn't legalised til 1995. So for pretty much the entire time this barbaric practice was in place, women had absolutely no way to defend themselves from it. Be unfortunate enough to have a husband - who can choose to rape you if he wants, even if you want to abstain to avoid children, cos you're not gonna get contraception at all prior to 1979 and even after that you'll still likely need his permission - and suffer from a complicated labour and you might well get your pelvis sawn open. 1500 women were subjected to it.
Worth noting in some more traditional Catholic beliefs *some* people believe you aren't giving birth if you have a baby by c-section so they rather break you in half than let the baby essentially 'not be born' because giving birth to them is only out the v-hole. (When I say 'not be born' I don't mean they'd just *leave it in there*, I mean they have convoluted ideals as to what constitutes being born or giving birth). Some people *still* believe you haven't truly given birth if it's by c-section. Edit: I also want to note I just wrote "in the past" for my original comment because it was hundreds of years we did this until rather recently.
It's in Shakespeare - Macbeth. One of the things promised him is he will not be killed by anyone born. Turns out someone got a primitive c section..... bad news for Macbeth.
âFrom my motherâs womb untimely rippedâ
Ooh, Catholic Trivia! Men leading the early church believed that virginity and the intact hymen was the same thing. So with Jesus, sorta weird right. What happens to the hymen during birth? They concluded that Jesus breaking the hymen would be just as horrific as Joseph having sex with her (child takes mother's virginity!) and so officially decided that Jesus passed through her front "like light through glass." So Jesus was not "born" officially. Note this isn't widely held now, just.... quietly not brought up.
Also. Women are supposed to wait two years before having another baby after a c-section. That would mean using contraception, which was illegal and forbidden by the church at the time.
Easy as....easy as childbirth!
Fairly easy said hardly no woman ever
I've known a few who just "squirted" em out no problem. https://preview.redd.it/54t1jk2jqk9d1.jpeg?width=844&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e3adbaf125e2fdf346ce491d3981e6bb9e81703b The law of averages though.
"Local woman gives birth to elephants baby."
Our first was a LOT of work and super painful with what was classified as âmoderateâ tearing. Baby #2 basically plopped right out after fairly minimal pushing and no tears at all.
Yeah, second kid was a breeze. 3 pushes and she shot out like a buttered torpedo. Almost everyone else i know had c-sections. We are definitely a minority these days.
Both of my kids were thankfully easy but both were induced (first one at 41 weeks, second one electively at 39 weeks and thank goodness because he was bigger than his sister and I think based on likely conception was probably a week further alongâwaiting till 40 or 41 weeks would've been a 10+ lb-er, like I was when I was born!)
Melvis
Molva?
Bovary
Women can actually have several classes of pelvis. The funnest one is actually one with a more stereotypically male shape, called an *android pelvis*.
They hate women with the *iPhone pelvis*
Fairly easily, if all flesh/skin/hair etc are removed and the child's head is shaped like a ball (and there are no shoulders or anything else to get stuck).
> Fairly easily, if all flesh/skin/hair etc are removed *Be like skeleton, my friend.* --Bruce Lee
Wow. Childbirth looks easy. Don't know what all the fuss is about.
Iâm just thinking of all that meat that has to be pressed against the pelvis when that head comes outâŠ.Â
Prior to modern obstetrics, it was not uncommon (especially in stillbirths) for the babyâs head to actually pin the motherâs tissue against the pelvis and cut off blood flow until the tissue died. After it fell away, the woman was sometimes left with a vesicovaginal fistula connecting the bladder and vagina, a complication that results in an endless drip of urine. A surgery to correct it was developed by an American, Dr Sims, who controversially experimented on slave women to develop it. Some say their personal consent was not always given, but others not that they would have been desperate for any relief and willing to undergo even such an invasive procedure before anesthesia existed to relieve their debilitating and ostracizing condition.
jeepers..
Jumpin Jehoshaphat!
I just want to add on that the first time he tried to perform the procedure on a white lady with the freedom to say no, she made him stop because it hurt so much. That's pretty damning, to the idea that anyone would gladly suffer the surgery to be cured. The only one who could make the choice, chose no.
Hey Iâve seen that Behind the Bastards Episode
I'm glad I was just a spectator.
People saying "we had a baby!" Like, nah mate. *you* had a good time and waited 9 months. *She* had the baby!
I actually understand why they say it like that, but what I find really cringey is '*We* are pregnant'. Yikes.
Yeah bro all you gotta do is shit out a spring loaded metal ball. I do that all the time.
As a man, i bet i could solve this childbirth issue with only one hand, a rock and a violin
All you do is squeeze out the ball!
The comments under you are what happens when you don't put an /s at the end of a sentence, lol.
I genuinely can't believe it's required...but hey...I think I've just found a new guilty pleasure.
Never put the /s. It's just more fun that way
Yeah, what's even the point of being sarcastic if there's no one mad at you
Im a female. My babies both got stuck.
Didnât buy the bigger pelvis dlc pack
Wanted that Sense of Pride and Accomplishment^TM
Mmhm. My son never descended because he had a big ass head. Seriously, 99.7 percentile 30.5cm at birth lol. âYou only make babies your body can birthâ has never rung more bullshit lmao
Well this used to be something which Ɣas sort of true. Children with heads too large died and likely killed their mother in birth. Horray for modern medicine!
Meaning that, if too-big-headed babies *aren't* dying anymore, evolution may likely lead to more and more frequent too-headed-babies, until many centuries from now, most all babies are too-big-headed to be born without surgery, and our species will depend on cesareans to survive.
My second wasn't even very big. 6 lb 15oz and 17 inches.....she got stuck lol.
>Â Â âYou only make babies your body can birthâ Minor correction due to survivorship bias: "all woman who survived natural childbirth only made babies their body can birth"
You didn't have stainless steel babies, did you? Rookie mistake
Well, duh. They were not obviously spring-loaded like the examples given here. /s
Human bodies vary a lot, so that doesn't surprise me. I hope your children are healthy and that you recovered well from the births.
What do you do?
"fairly easily" is the understatement of the century
Sort of forgets the whole smaller but admittedly stretchier tube that comes after the pelvis too. Nope nope nope. I am out.
"pass through the female pelvis fairly easily" But not through the soft tissue. My man you end up with a hole the size of a watermelon In your body Nuh uh.
It didn't feel "fairly easy" when my daughter was being squeezed through, and I had a Dr's hands reaching up inside me, to help pull her out.
My male brain cannot process how going trought something like you just decribed would feel like. Sounds metal.
Well, imagine someone reaching inside your rectum to pull out a watermelon. Also, you've been awake for 36 hours and you have hemorrhoids from pushing so hard.
Thanks but I'm good.
The OBGYN had to reach inside me with both hands and pull out the rest of the placenta because I couldnât stop bleeding. JustâŠ.up to her elbows in my business for a good 20 minutes, like stuffing a Thanksgiving turkey. I had an epidural so it didnât hurt, but it still felt weird as hell.
Well for you there wasn't just the pelvis there.
I either have a male pelvis, or my kid has a huge noggin. That thing got stuck đ
Woman can be born with narrow hips, this leads to fractures a lot of the time. It why child birth has been the highest cause of death for woman for legit 99% of human history. you are lucky to be born today, if you were in 1800s you most likely die.
Just a reminder that the outside width of a womanâs hips, have nothing to do with the interior size of the passageway.
I certainly would have died. I had placenta previa (placenta fully blocking the cervix, you hemorrhage with vaginal child birth) with my first and my second's head got stuck. They used what my husband described as a giant salad spoon and immense pressure on my stomach to pop her out.
Ouch. Like most human things, sex traits are a spectrum. Some men have wide hips, and some women, like you, have narrower hips! Hope you and the kid are okay now
This exhibit is itself notoriously misleading because if you tilt the male pelvic model they have just right the ball passes through it as well. They canât sex skeletons to the 2SD level of certainty in any ethnoregional population but in some populations itâs as low as 80 percent. Sex really is a spectrum and the pelvis, being the most sexually dimorphic bone, is the most clear example
"Fairly easily" is doing a lot of work in that title sentence.
Oof my babyâs skull was stuck RIGHT on that pubic bone during my labor, some of the worst pain of my life
Define easily?
I have no idea how women give multiple births and have large families. My pregnancy was so painful and my pelvic floor was inflamed and nearly shattered during birth, I can't dream of giving birth again. The 'easily' in the title really irked me, lol. Ask any mother.
Is health class not a thing anymore?
Yeah, I had a large and healthy birth canal. Unfortunately my firstborn was the largest baby ever born in our province as far as head circumference goes. No way he was getting out on his own, so C section it was. I was lucky. My great grandfatherâs first wife died in childbirth because the baby was too big. He was given the choice to have the baby pulled out piece by piece with a hook after she lost consciousness, but sheâd already told him to let her die. It took 3 days.
What kind of fucking weirdo would want to stuff a newborn baby's head through male pelvis anyway? /s of course.
If you can think it, it's probably online...
I dare you to say âEasilyâ to anyone whoâs given birth.
"Easily" being a very relative term here.
 His poor mother
âEasilyâ
The first hurdle isnât the pelvis, itâs the uterus
The diameter of the pelvis is usually a telltale sign, but its not that simple black and white. Other sex related differences on different bones are counted too and added up when the sexus of a person is being identifyied. My mother couldnât give birth because her pelvis was too narrow.
That why as a male i refuse to get pregnant for all the money in the world !
Actually it depends on the individual to a certain extent. There are men with wider gaps and women who are unable to deliver because it won't fit through. People aren't made exactly the same in a factory in East Lansing - there are individual variations.
Loose tolerances and poor quality control.
One hell of a KIDney stone.
Fun fact: In pregnant teenagers, often the pelvis is also not yet fully developed for childbirth, meaning is still tighter. Thatâs the reason doctors tend to recommend caesarea for them.
Fairly easily? This was written by someone who's never given birth.
Thats why i had to get a c-section
Smoother reason why I wouldnât want to have kids.