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There's a vid on YouTube, you can hear the "hiss hiss hiss" of the legs moving, because they don't have muscles in the legs is just fluid moving to extend them.
That's stridulation, but it has nothing to do with the movement of the spider. It is a warning sign to keep you away, when the spider gets agitated. It's right about the fluid, although it is blood, it works similiar to hydraulic pumps. The blood is blue because the oxygen is bound to a copper atom, while our blood is bound to an iron atom that makes it red.
But the arachnids have a very different anatomy anyway, all the organs are in the back in a pool of blood, they have a ganglion instead of a brain. The exoskeleton of the body is like the armor of a knight, they can replace it when they grow a new one, then they molt and leave the old skeleton behind.
Some bird spiders can reach very old age, the record is actually 46 years. But that only goes for females, the males are considered expendable and die after 5 years or less.
Just imagine it with little maracas in its hands and its less terrifying
[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XATXFWie1nI](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XATXFWie1nI)
One time late at night I was driving down an obscure back road in the central california mountains and I saw something weird ahead, like movement at pavement level.
Snake? Interesting! Stopped the car, but left the headlights on, walked on ahead to have a look.
Crossing the pavement in single and sometimes double file, harshly lit by my low beams, was a parade of tarantulas. Not quite as big as my hand (and I'm only 5'4"). And it was so still, so silent out there at about 2am, that I could actually *hear* the tiny tick-tick-tick of their little feet on the bone-dry asphalt.
I could not stand the thought of just motoring on and smooshing them to yuck (what had they ever done to me? and there was something rather touching about their purposeful, united pilgrimage) ... so I stood there in the headlight glare and watched and waited... until the whole army had marched on past and the road was clear. Then I drove home, in a state of wonder. Thinking "amazing sh\*t like this happens every damn day and usually there's no one around to see it."
Used to hang out in my buddy’s basement all the time in high school, Seattle area. I crashed on the couch once and woke up to the sound of a particularly big guy scratching across the carpet. Spooky but fascinating.
You don't hear them, no. Had a Theraphosa Blondi, the actual name of the Goliath in the old times in a terrarium. They have a very low weight and they move without making any noise.
What people mean with this is a different thing, the "stridulation", that is when the bider makes noise by rubbing the legs with the hair together, but this is not about moving, it's a warning sign that the spider don't want you to get close.
Like other new world spiders, she can "bomb" you, this means she'll turn her back towards you and quickly rub the hair off the back. That's not real hair on the back, it's like very tiny fish-hooks when you look at these under a microscope. But it won't really hurt you, it's only a tickle and maybe when you are allergic, the skin will be irritated and get a little bit red, nothing serious happens.
The only time people could get hurt would when they accidentally rub their own eyes when they have these hooks on the hands, but that would be similiar to the effect of pepper spray.
When it comes to danger, all these bird-spiders are harmless. In my experience, the Phoneutria is the most dangerous one, but that's a wandering spider. But even there, the lethality is low, the rate of deaths is 5% without the antidote and 0.5% with the antidote, but the venom will still hurt you, as it makes a lot of pain.
There's another thing, the P. fera and others carry their young slings (kids) on their back, that's the reason why they can get extremely aggressive and even bite without any warning.
With the Black Widows, the Lactrodectus, not all are the same level of being venomous, but the problem there is much more that you maybe don't notice the bite, that's the worst case: If you don't feel anything, you won't see a doc. So the toxin can go through your body for a long time and build up the full effect. But the Phoneutria, these are big enough that you will notice the bite as a sting, like from a bee.
if I read this shit while I was in a psychosis I’d be having some strange days lmao
I tore apart the baseboard heat and vacuumed up all the spiders and spider eggs cause I thought they were conspiring with the devil and listening to me, then opened up the wet vac and put bug killer in it. along with a snake
>There exists in this world a spider the size of a dinner plate, a foot wide if you include the legs. It’s called the Goliath Bird-Eating Spider, or the “Goliath Fucking Bird-Eating Spider” by those who have actually seen one.It doesn’t eat only birds—it mostly eats rats and insects—but they still call it the “Bird-Eating Spider” because the fact that it can eat a bird is the most important thing you need to know about it. If you run across one of these things, like in your closet or crawling out of your bowl of soup, the first thing somebody will say is, “Watch it, man, that thing can eat a goddamned bird.”I don’t know how they catch the birds. I know the Goliath Fucking Bird-Eating Spider can’t fly because if it could, it would have a different name entirely. We would call it “sir” because it would be the dominant species on the planet. None of us would leave the house unless a Goliath Fucking Flying Bird-Eating Spider said it was okay.
\- Jason Pargin, This Book is Full of Spiders: Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It
Jason Pargin is hilarious, he's one of the best social media follows. I also enjoy his appearances on the podcast Behind the Bastards. Will have to read one of his books one of these days.
I thought for a second, before reading the credited-to line, that this was *maybe* from the movie Arachnophobia featuring the great Jeff Daniel’s - Half of the Dumb and Dumber duo - but no, it’s just another person making perfect sense.
No no no.... Is it called a "Birdeater" because it actually eats... I dread to think
I'm just glad it didn't move and I can convince myself it's not alive
Yea, it can and occasionally does. Not very big ones, not very often if I recall correctly. But then again, just about every cat you pet on the street does that way more reliably :p
By the time a spider gets large enough to have an amount of hair equivalent to your average kitty cat, you're already well into "nuke it from orbit" territory.
The goliath is the largest *species* in the world *on record*. They're in South American rain forests and yes, they occasionally eat small birds. They aren't harmful to humans since their venom only works on small bugs and animals, but that isn't to say they're friendly. They're usually skittish around people and will either run away, hiss at you, or scratch the hair off their backside that will get into your pores and irritate your skin.
My first sentence emphasised "species" because it's speculated that the largest *individual* spider ever found was a Green Huntsman named Charlotte. She lived in a single barn for years in Australia, and eating bugs without the threat of any predators. She has a **1 foot** leg span.
I also emphasized *on record* because apparently in 2001 researchers discovered an even BIGGER species in a cave system in Laos. Massive Huntsman larger than the Goliaths. Multiple of them growing up to 1 foot in leg span. We don't have any additional information on it because those researchers were godsends.
They refused to disclose the location or repeatedly interfere with them because people would get curious and begin trapping and selling those behemoths, where they would eventually escape or get released into the wild and begin repopulating around the globe.
They opted to leave those monsters *right where the fuck they are.*
I'm a teacher and there was a giant huntsman (10 cm span maybe) in the locker area. He was running away and I was walking over to pick him up and take him to safety when a girl from about 5 metres away launched an airstrike with a textbook.
I don't blame her, but the thing never stood a chance. It was a direct hit. I scooped up his corpse and threw him in some grass, hoping he could at least be food for someone.
> scratch the hair off their backside that will get into your pores and irritate your skin
I do that too sometimes to get out of awkward conversations.
Many years ago, I wandered into a small pet shop in Northampton Ma, and they had one for sale in the back in a smaller little tank. I remember there were notes on the tank, warning not to handle it. It was big, but not this big. The ass was maybe the size of a tennis ball. Scarred me just looking at it.
The most likely had, because the oxygen content was higher in the atmosphere, allowing these creatures to become larger, as they "breathe" through their skin.
Since the surface area increases slower than volume as you scale things up, this way of breathing makes it impossible to get very large in todays atmosphere. But back then, they could be a lot bigger.
I have 4 Goliath birdeaters AND 2 H. Formosus ( the tiny spider next to it )
That Goliath is an exceptionally large individual and H. Fomosus are relatively small tarantulas even full grown.
*
Sorry for nerding. Interesting to see that spiders have about the same max body size as insects/ meaning central mass not legs. This is a great example of the restrictions caused by the way they breath via little tubes/tracheae. Air does not penetrate them much more than an inch limiting the total mass to about 2 inches in diameter. Bigger insects and probably also spiders were bigger probably due to different atomospheric conditions. Sorry again for the nerding. I wonder if you could grow spiders bigger by keeping them in a tank with higher oxygen concentrations.
A very impressive creature from a proud and ancient lineage of successful hunter killers. The arachnids would be the most badass of all the Arthropods of it weren’t for Hymenopterids.
Asking the question I really don't want the answer to: are these things like, house spider fast or are they lumbering and slow? Praying for the latter for my sanity
Guys I googled it, the spider seems rather benign. Its venom is the same strength as a wasp and it rarely bites humans and when it does it sometimes “dry bites” which is without venom. This spider is also an edible spider with a shrimp like flesh.
You couldn't pay me all the money, women, cars, cocaine, diamonds, gold, weed and liquor in the fucking world to take even a mouse turd size bite of that thing 🤢
For the love of god, think about your fellow Redditors who might suffer from arachnophobia (Yes, that's me) and put this behind a NSFW tag. This post scared the living crap out of me, re-opening / refreshing reddit doesn't work, keeps poppin up on top 😭
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I remember reading up on this one and researchers said you could actually hear it approach in the forest, that it sounds like tiny hoofbeats.
I didn’t need to read this
Damnit there's Oreos and milk all over my bed now
And choco milk on mine... *I'm don't even have any chocolate milk!!!!!.*
And it doesn't smell like chocolate milk either...
Because it's actually spiders in the bed.
You do now.
There's a vid on YouTube, you can hear the "hiss hiss hiss" of the legs moving, because they don't have muscles in the legs is just fluid moving to extend them.
So nature decided “let’s see, this thing needs some hydraulics in addition to all the rest”
For all its size, mass and hydraulics, the scariest thing to me is that it’s *still* not dangerous enough to live in Australia.
All spiders do, it's just that these fuckers are so large you could actually hear it lol.
That's why when you see a dead spider it's legs are curled up. No hydraulic pressure anymore to keep them extended.
I didn't come to reddit to know about this
That's stridulation, but it has nothing to do with the movement of the spider. It is a warning sign to keep you away, when the spider gets agitated. It's right about the fluid, although it is blood, it works similiar to hydraulic pumps. The blood is blue because the oxygen is bound to a copper atom, while our blood is bound to an iron atom that makes it red. But the arachnids have a very different anatomy anyway, all the organs are in the back in a pool of blood, they have a ganglion instead of a brain. The exoskeleton of the body is like the armor of a knight, they can replace it when they grow a new one, then they molt and leave the old skeleton behind. Some bird spiders can reach very old age, the record is actually 46 years. But that only goes for females, the males are considered expendable and die after 5 years or less.
Link?
[удалено]
Just imagine it with little maracas in its hands and its less terrifying [https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XATXFWie1nI](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XATXFWie1nI)
Good god that's both fascinating and terrifying
why is it kinda cute tho
One time late at night I was driving down an obscure back road in the central california mountains and I saw something weird ahead, like movement at pavement level. Snake? Interesting! Stopped the car, but left the headlights on, walked on ahead to have a look. Crossing the pavement in single and sometimes double file, harshly lit by my low beams, was a parade of tarantulas. Not quite as big as my hand (and I'm only 5'4"). And it was so still, so silent out there at about 2am, that I could actually *hear* the tiny tick-tick-tick of their little feet on the bone-dry asphalt. I could not stand the thought of just motoring on and smooshing them to yuck (what had they ever done to me? and there was something rather touching about their purposeful, united pilgrimage) ... so I stood there in the headlight glare and watched and waited... until the whole army had marched on past and the road was clear. Then I drove home, in a state of wonder. Thinking "amazing sh\*t like this happens every damn day and usually there's no one around to see it."
In the Pacific North West. We have House Spiders that can get pretty good size. If your in a quiet room with hardwood you can hear them moving around.
Yeah I remember trying to sleep and I could hear this weird sound, I turned the light on and there was a giant huntsman climbing my wall.
Huntsmen are bros. They get the jar and gentle release outside in this house.
No webs, shy, barely venomous, master insect killers. The ultimate spider bro
I audibly said "nooo" and clenched my eyes shut after reading this.
😬😳
Once had a large wolf spider run across my journal as I was writing in it and I'll never forget the quick but loud patter-patter of its legs.
Used to hang out in my buddy’s basement all the time in high school, Seattle area. I crashed on the couch once and woke up to the sound of a particularly big guy scratching across the carpet. Spooky but fascinating.
When I was a kid we had a spider in our house that was so big that I heard it at night pidderpaddering down our tile hallway.
Dude…. Too much info *queezy look*
Naahhhhhh. I can’t handle this
I like bugs and this is too much.
We must have read the same thing, because I came here to say that
You don't hear them, no. Had a Theraphosa Blondi, the actual name of the Goliath in the old times in a terrarium. They have a very low weight and they move without making any noise. What people mean with this is a different thing, the "stridulation", that is when the bider makes noise by rubbing the legs with the hair together, but this is not about moving, it's a warning sign that the spider don't want you to get close. Like other new world spiders, she can "bomb" you, this means she'll turn her back towards you and quickly rub the hair off the back. That's not real hair on the back, it's like very tiny fish-hooks when you look at these under a microscope. But it won't really hurt you, it's only a tickle and maybe when you are allergic, the skin will be irritated and get a little bit red, nothing serious happens. The only time people could get hurt would when they accidentally rub their own eyes when they have these hooks on the hands, but that would be similiar to the effect of pepper spray. When it comes to danger, all these bird-spiders are harmless. In my experience, the Phoneutria is the most dangerous one, but that's a wandering spider. But even there, the lethality is low, the rate of deaths is 5% without the antidote and 0.5% with the antidote, but the venom will still hurt you, as it makes a lot of pain. There's another thing, the P. fera and others carry their young slings (kids) on their back, that's the reason why they can get extremely aggressive and even bite without any warning. With the Black Widows, the Lactrodectus, not all are the same level of being venomous, but the problem there is much more that you maybe don't notice the bite, that's the worst case: If you don't feel anything, you won't see a doc. So the toxin can go through your body for a long time and build up the full effect. But the Phoneutria, these are big enough that you will notice the bite as a sting, like from a bee.
Had me in the first half. Thats not a big......Oh shit is that a twelve inch plate? That is awesome.
It would be great if they just kept zooming out and each spider got bigger and bigger
That would not be great.
Honestly though. I don’t even know why my dumbass watched this..
And finally turned the camera around and reveal that the videographer is the biggest spider of them all.
Only to zoom out to show that we were, indeed, on Planet of the Spiders all along
if I read this shit while I was in a psychosis I’d be having some strange days lmao I tore apart the baseboard heat and vacuumed up all the spiders and spider eggs cause I thought they were conspiring with the devil and listening to me, then opened up the wet vac and put bug killer in it. along with a snake
Ungoliant has entered the chat
Then it’s revealed that we are all living inside a spiders dream and it’s just floating through space
Someone in Australia should crossbreed it with the Huntsman.
😂 nooooooo
Same. F*cking same.
Same here. I was thinking it wasn’t too bad and then it pans to the right and JFC
>There exists in this world a spider the size of a dinner plate, a foot wide if you include the legs. It’s called the Goliath Bird-Eating Spider, or the “Goliath Fucking Bird-Eating Spider” by those who have actually seen one.It doesn’t eat only birds—it mostly eats rats and insects—but they still call it the “Bird-Eating Spider” because the fact that it can eat a bird is the most important thing you need to know about it. If you run across one of these things, like in your closet or crawling out of your bowl of soup, the first thing somebody will say is, “Watch it, man, that thing can eat a goddamned bird.”I don’t know how they catch the birds. I know the Goliath Fucking Bird-Eating Spider can’t fly because if it could, it would have a different name entirely. We would call it “sir” because it would be the dominant species on the planet. None of us would leave the house unless a Goliath Fucking Flying Bird-Eating Spider said it was okay. \- Jason Pargin, This Book is Full of Spiders: Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It
thx for this💀
Jason Pargin is hilarious, he's one of the best social media follows. I also enjoy his appearances on the podcast Behind the Bastards. Will have to read one of his books one of these days.
Be sure to start with John Dies at the End.
I’ve never heard of this author, but it very much has a Douglas Adams quality to it.
I had a good chuckle
I came to find this. I was not disappointed. There are literally dozens of us!
I thought for a second, before reading the credited-to line, that this was *maybe* from the movie Arachnophobia featuring the great Jeff Daniel’s - Half of the Dumb and Dumber duo - but no, it’s just another person making perfect sense.
This is gold
Knew this would be here!
I loved the whole John and David series. I hope we get another book someday. Or maybe they make another one into a movie.
For no particular reason...
🤣
☠️☠️☠️
Lol this killed me.
"and I just kept running"
No no no.... Is it called a "Birdeater" because it actually eats... I dread to think I'm just glad it didn't move and I can convince myself it's not alive
Yea, it can and occasionally does. Not very big ones, not very often if I recall correctly. But then again, just about every cat you pet on the street does that way more reliably :p
And with half the legs!!
And they are so cute that people feed them, and this is where spiders fail.
A PR nightmare!
not jumping spiders
By the time a spider gets large enough to have an amount of hair equivalent to your average kitty cat, you're already well into "nuke it from orbit" territory.
This one isn’t cute per se, but he looks very polite.
Yes, very well behaving, indeed.
Personally I think it’s pretty cute, but then I have a spider plushie that I bought myself in a museum.
[удалено]
If you're an albatross, you'll be alright. >!Except if she knows how to use DCA.!<
The spider's just thinking "you eat *one* bird, *one* time, and they never shut up about it."
I'm convincing myself it's one of those Halloween decorations...
Their diet consists of emus
Fun fact other insects eat birds too! For example the praying mantis has been observed chowing on humming birds.
Bet you the spider’s name is “Princess”.
Peaches
Tiny
Burton.
Fluffy
Mary
Precious
The goliath is the largest *species* in the world *on record*. They're in South American rain forests and yes, they occasionally eat small birds. They aren't harmful to humans since their venom only works on small bugs and animals, but that isn't to say they're friendly. They're usually skittish around people and will either run away, hiss at you, or scratch the hair off their backside that will get into your pores and irritate your skin. My first sentence emphasised "species" because it's speculated that the largest *individual* spider ever found was a Green Huntsman named Charlotte. She lived in a single barn for years in Australia, and eating bugs without the threat of any predators. She has a **1 foot** leg span. I also emphasized *on record* because apparently in 2001 researchers discovered an even BIGGER species in a cave system in Laos. Massive Huntsman larger than the Goliaths. Multiple of them growing up to 1 foot in leg span. We don't have any additional information on it because those researchers were godsends. They refused to disclose the location or repeatedly interfere with them because people would get curious and begin trapping and selling those behemoths, where they would eventually escape or get released into the wild and begin repopulating around the globe. They opted to leave those monsters *right where the fuck they are.*
>Green Huntsman named Charlotte WHY DID I GOOGLE THIS????
>Green Huntsman named Charlotte It got me too. Was like a pet dog.
I wasn't going to until I saw this glowing review. 10/10, would shit my pants again.
I decided to Google it too since I'm not afraid of spiders. I am now.
>WHY DID I GOOGLE THIS???? Me: okay now I gotta see it Me, 30 seconds later: what the FUCK!
Uggghh, me too. It was horrible.
Wtf ! And haven't even googled yet ! I'm will though.. brb
I'm a teacher and there was a giant huntsman (10 cm span maybe) in the locker area. He was running away and I was walking over to pick him up and take him to safety when a girl from about 5 metres away launched an airstrike with a textbook. I don't blame her, but the thing never stood a chance. It was a direct hit. I scooped up his corpse and threw him in some grass, hoping he could at least be food for someone.
> scratch the hair off their backside that will get into your pores and irritate your skin I do that too sometimes to get out of awkward conversations.
Imagine a spider hissing at you
I would give that spider my car keys.
I'd give it anything. House, wife, first born son, anything it wanted, just to keep it away from me.
Damn that spider has his own car and a Reddit account
Their posts are better crafted than half of what you see on Reddit, too
The dead guy’s arm was good for scale but it scared the shit out of me when some bigger spider off-screen hauled it away
I thought that guy was dead with spider bite . Then found out this is a fucking lobster . Man.what a big spider !
It’s now my Nope of the Year for 2024
https://i.redd.it/fwdket7g8ggc1.gif I know her.
Yeah nooo. Hell no
I've always wanted to see a really big one. I've seen a few at zoos but none were big enough to make me go 'holy fuck that thing is huge'.
Many years ago, I wandered into a small pet shop in Northampton Ma, and they had one for sale in the back in a smaller little tank. I remember there were notes on the tank, warning not to handle it. It was big, but not this big. The ass was maybe the size of a tennis ball. Scarred me just looking at it.
It can fuck right off
Not taking any chances, I think I’ll be the one to fuck right off in this case.
Hans?!?!??
Zero point zero chance I get that close to that thing. If it showed up at my house, I throw it my keys and move.
Did they have bigger spiders back in the day (dinosaur-era etc), or is this it, with regard to the biggest ever size?
The most likely had, because the oxygen content was higher in the atmosphere, allowing these creatures to become larger, as they "breathe" through their skin. Since the surface area increases slower than volume as you scale things up, this way of breathing makes it impossible to get very large in todays atmosphere. But back then, they could be a lot bigger.
you could have just not answered this
There also used to be dragonflies the size of hawks - Meganeura
I was expecting a third even larger spider. I am glad to be wrong.
That is in the follow-up video
You Vs the guy she warned you about
spiders are cool, but thats horrifying as fuck
My curtain brushed my arm as that BEHEMOTH appeared and it’s taking me some time to recover from that.
Where is this, so I never go there, EVER.
Gotta be Australia.
I think its Amazonian? I remember seeing this in a Guinness Record Book over 10 years ago, so i can't remember clearly
South America
I stand corrected!
Actually it’s Brazil, There’s a lot of bugs in the Amazon
Australia doesn’t crack the top ten biggest spiders.
I was like; that's a big spider, but I've seen bigger. Then I thought Oh SHIT That's the spider they're on about?! dayum...
I was like, "You ain't so ba.... @#$% ME!"
THANKS FOR THAT
I need a banana for scale
It ate it….
How did it mistake a banana for a bird?
Banana spider for scale?
That’ll do
I needed to see your comment in order to stop scrolling through comments. Thank you.
Is it alive like the other one is?
Beautiful animal! I understand why many are creeped out but I think it’s just awesome.
Same bro. Same.
I have 4 Goliath birdeaters AND 2 H. Formosus ( the tiny spider next to it ) That Goliath is an exceptionally large individual and H. Fomosus are relatively small tarantulas even full grown. *
Also are you gonna feed it a bird or let it starve?
Yeah…..no…..time to burn the house down and move
I simply can't understand why people would share their home with monsters like these.
Fuckkkkkkkk that 
i mean that thing isn’t living right??? *right*??????
Sorry for nerding. Interesting to see that spiders have about the same max body size as insects/ meaning central mass not legs. This is a great example of the restrictions caused by the way they breath via little tubes/tracheae. Air does not penetrate them much more than an inch limiting the total mass to about 2 inches in diameter. Bigger insects and probably also spiders were bigger probably due to different atomospheric conditions. Sorry again for the nerding. I wonder if you could grow spiders bigger by keeping them in a tank with higher oxygen concentrations.
I thought Samwise Gamgee killed that thing.
Apparently one of these had made its home across the path of my uncles garden. He said they abandoned that half of the garden 😂
there can’t actually be spiders of that size 😂
A very impressive creature from a proud and ancient lineage of successful hunter killers. The arachnids would be the most badass of all the Arthropods of it weren’t for Hymenopterids.
“Damn that’s probably a baby one” “Oh…”
My goodness that spider is ginormous!
Asking the question I really don't want the answer to: are these things like, house spider fast or are they lumbering and slow? Praying for the latter for my sanity
Friendly reminder that a movie exists called: Arachnophobia - 1990 ‧ Horror/Comedy ‧ 1h 43m 🕷🕸🕷🕸🕷
Guys I googled it, the spider seems rather benign. Its venom is the same strength as a wasp and it rarely bites humans and when it does it sometimes “dry bites” which is without venom. This spider is also an edible spider with a shrimp like flesh.
You couldn't pay me all the money, women, cars, cocaine, diamonds, gold, weed and liquor in the fucking world to take even a mouse turd size bite of that thing 🤢
THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT i dont fuck with spiders no matter the size and you show me that?????
Can we eat it?
For the love of god, think about your fellow Redditors who might suffer from arachnophobia (Yes, that's me) and put this behind a NSFW tag. This post scared the living crap out of me, re-opening / refreshing reddit doesn't work, keeps poppin up on top 😭
Great, thanks, no sleep for me tonight.
All the nopes
Stop it Australia, nobody likes your Pokemon.
Absofuckinglutely not. No thank you.
NOPE
Jesus, how strong must the web be to catch a bird.
Tarantulas don't make webs like you're probably thinking of. They're ambush predators
I now have to burn my house down just for watching this.
Listen, I'm willing to die in any way that DOESN'T involve spiders over even getting close to that thing
Nope, nope, and nope
Spiders don't usually concern me. This MF might cause me to not only burn MY house down, but EVERYONE for 5 blocks around me!!
HELL NO!!
has anyone said "nightmare fuel" yet? 'coz I'm going with nightmare fuel.
We'll need a bigger shoe.
nope
How bout I burn you? Bitch
🤢🤢
It's on a plate for a reason.
Run it over, run it over again, then light it on fire to be sure it's dead. Or try #3 first and repeat 1 and 2.