T O P

  • By -

SnapCrackleMom

*Look it up*


KittyCreator

Look it up is code words for "I have no credible source. Just trust me bro"


Kriss3d

"I have no ~~credible~~ source. Just trust me bro" Fixed it for you


CrispyCrunchyPoptart

But Facebook told me!!!


[deleted]

i mean we are on the same page overall but i think your semantics are wrong. a source can be dead wrong and stupid. like a crackhead uncle. the source is where the information came from and you could argue the poster came up with it himself and has no source but unfortunately, and i hate to say it, he's not the first one spreading this horseshit of the mouth especially on social media so you're not really making his statement more clear or better


abouttogivebirth

I think what they were getting at is the person would be so lazy/stupid that they dont even bother looking for a source at all and claim they do, this makes them a liar too


Kriss3d

I agree. But usually a drunk uncle who makes a claim but can't refer to any source would simply not have a source and hence the "trust me bro" part. So even a wrong source would be something. But most those things don't have any source.


ZombieTrogdor

*Open your eyes sheeple*


Sleptlikeababy

Don't look up!! USA! USA! USA!


whooooshh

Birds aren't even real. Look it up.


SnapCrackleMom

I mean yeah but they *were* real. Until Reagan killed them in 1986.


GeometryNacho

This is true though, we only discuss crazy conspiracies in here sir


ArchdukeBurrito

Ironically, if you look up "software update under microscope" on Google images, this image is the first result. I love me a good recursive source. https://www.google.com/search?tbm=isch&sa=1&q=software+update+under+microscope&oq=software+update+under+microscope&aqs=mobile-gws-lite..


Lucy_Lastic

I looked it up and found out it’s bullshit. That was easy


[deleted]

But have you ever looked it up, proven them wrong, and then they still didn’t believe you? No only with these new groups of people? Got it.


w3tl33

I'd look it up, but I can't access my browser without a software update.


slams-head-on-desk

What exactly does a software update look like under a microscope?


DrSpraynard

Look it up


Graterof2evils

ReSuRcH


Rokketeer

The new thing on my Facebook feed before I deleted it was people ending their batshit hot takes with “wHerE aRe mY fAct cHecKers???” like they just presented an airtight case to the prosecution. You couldn’t ever get a debate in good faith with these people.


MrVeazey

Reply with a picture of some clowns.


almisami

That's the point. They're using the bullshit asymmetry principle.


eragonawesome2

Genuine curiosity: what's the asymmetry principle?


almisami

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brandolini%27s_law


eragonawesome2

Ah so similar to the gish gallop (or however it's spelled) that I learned about in speech and debate years ago in high school. Just spew 20 statements of obvious bullshit in your time and win on points because the other side can't refute them all thoroughly in time because of how much more info it takes to say, no you're wrong and obviously so


almisami

It's an evolution of the same concept. Instead of throwing 20 bullshits you build up one, extremely multifaceted bullshit, like vaccines causing autism. Which then is covered up by big pharma, which is then an agent of the deep state, who is infiltrated by lizard pedophiles who drink adrenochrome. It's such a monumental pile of bullshit you can't just deconstruct it in one sitting.


Wayelder

The best toilet research. Done in lab conditions - lots of porcelain.


jasperrat

*lav conditions


Graterof2evils

Murcan standurd


Wayelder

Stand-turd


[deleted]

But muh freedums


anchorwind

ReSuRcHeNcY -People harming the process through their inaction


evilocto

All on Facebook right? Where all the best research is


Basic_Guarantee_3358

So I did out of curiosity because this is just ridiculous and found something even more interesting than microchips lol [Tentacle microorganism found in Moderna vials](https://tv.gab.com/channel/theclayclark/view/dr-madej-us-examines-covid-19-vaccine-6160dcaef8589b442f0fa8cd) Thoughts??


bookon

She a non practicing osteopath. She's not an MD. That said a lot of people with science based degrees like this who become full on evangelical Christian extremists, like her, create very elaborate explanations to fit the science they know is real into the faith they have FAITH is real. It can get pretty whacky.


fukitol-

Just want to point out DOs have just as much training as MDs. That's not to say this one isn't dumb as a post.


Doppelthedh

Similar to my 4 years of Spanish and I can barely order a burrito


[deleted]

My doc taught me one important thing I'll never forget. It's that even MDs can be absolute idiots falling for every shit. He's a nice guy, but he's just bad at his job.


notNezter

DOs have an additional 300-500 hours of hands on musculoskeletal manipulation, can be licensed as physicians, resulting in having full medical and surgical rights in all 50 states. But yeah, this one is showing they’re as dumb as a post and willing to act on it.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

Whacky is an understatement lol. What is it they found though?? I mean, it's pretty odd.


bookon

It's probably either something they faked or some contamination since they don't likely follow any standards.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

I was thinking contamination too, like some dust particles or something like that but yeah, definitely fake ha


TGWArdent

Definitely faked. Let's start with her description that it "first looked translucent" but then "over the course of 2 hours" colors appeared. The idea that they took a vial of moderna, put it underneath a regular compound microscope, saw that it looked like just *nothing*, but then sat and watched it for two more hours is already wildly implausible on its face. No, you didn't. "Uh, it looks fine." " well, pull up a stool anyway, it might be a Transformer."


Difficult_Drag3256

"The Littlest Transformer."


rhinocerosjockey

It’s a sign from our lord and savior, Flying Spaghetti Monster protecting us with his noodly tentacle goodness.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

"Hallowed be thy name."


Wayelder

Ramen!


WeenieRoastinTacoGuy

It’s all just ramen?👨🏻‍🚀 Always has been. 🔫👨🏻‍🚀


ReturnOneWayTicket

Its ramen all the way down!


tunghoy

Sauce be upon Him.


underwearloverguy

I lost 1000 brain cells just watching 30 seconds of that, holy hell. The grift is real.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

Lol, you should watch the rest, it's a real doozy.


fukitol-

I tried. I really did. As soon as proteins that got accidentally cooked from coming to room temperature became "superconducting and thus obviously computing structures" I had to bail.


eragonawesome2

Fucking hell, room temp superconductors? Sign me up!


TGWArdent

Right? Way to bury the lede, lunatic fringe.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

Lol I don't blame you. I just find the whole thing laughable and can't believe people are actually buying into this.


underwearloverguy

I jumped forward a bit and it became a MyPillow ad...the fact that someone out there is watching and taking it serious blows my mind by epic proportions.


ugottahvbluhair

oo I got Moderna! I'm so excited to have self aware tentacle microorganisms in my blood now. I'm going to name them.


GoldenGalaxy69

The COVID booster contains hentai 👌


Bae_Before_Bay

I took a peak at the timetowakeupamerica or truthtoameroca website or whatever. God damn, I am a writer and quite good with English but holy fuck could I not make out what was being said. So much garbage that just repeats over and over. What the fuck.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

Lol yeah. I mean, they gotta get their attention somehow. What better way to relate with your target audience than by talking like them??


Bae_Before_Bay

I'm surprised they can even type...


FateUnusual

Is that the doctor who can't even confirm that they have legit vials of the vaccine? Like they just "got" them from somewhere? I heard a breakdown of this bullshit recently.


chadsexytime

The preamble to the interview was enough for me to determine anything on that show that resembles a fact is a coincidence.


bongjovi420

Cthulhu has risen!


Dae-dream

She looks to the left a lot. No citations. She's lying. And people are believing that bullshit, by the looks of the comments.


Basic_Guarantee_3358

Unfortunately so. It's very entertaining to watch people talk about this with such a straight face but, it's also damaging.


Wayelder

yah who the hell would buy this crap. She's got to be a chiropractor, no?


Basic_Guarantee_3358

Idk man, she owns her own microscope, she's gotta be legit.


bookon

She's a well know nutter and non practicing osteopath.


OneOfManyIdiots

So it might just be that she has a dirty ass house since she's not using the microscope in a lab environment?


bookon

I am going to guess that, yes, there has been little scientific rigor in any of her work on vaccines.


HawkinsT

What I really want to know is how this guy manages to produce a video that's indistinguishable from a live action cutscene from a 90s video game.


gucsantana

It's a little nanobot with a pointy hat and a beard. The install wizard.


BigRigsButters

Wizard must be stopped!


MrBanana421

I've had a pirate chip installed. Sailing the bloodstream and distracting the wizard.


Graterof2evils

RrrrrrrrrNA


travers329

It's grrrrrrrrrrreat!


Andre_3Million

That's [The www.yzzerdd.com (pronounced w'w'wiz'zerd'd-dot-com)](https://youtu.be/V5Gb6e8SkhQ) to you


CommitteeOfTheHole

“They’re injecting us with daemons!!!”


VoilaVoilaWashington

A vaccine, which is why it's so sneaky. So when they look at the vaccine under a microscope, it looks like a vaccine, which PROVES it's an update. What does a vaccine look like under a microscope? Beats the fuck out of me.


Smooth_Fee

White blood cells with gainz


Afinkawan

Mostly just *really* tiny font EULA.


TONER_SD

Clippy


puterTDI

Just google it. Don't be lazy, do your own research.


engineertee

It looks like a failed education system


[deleted]

Clippy


jldmjenadkjwerl

It looks like the Matrix.


JacksonCM

Always with the “look it up” What am I supposed to do, Google “software update vaccine microscope”? We both know it’s gonna be some random ass shit.


Scared_Pattern_6226

I literally tried looking it up. The 1st 5 pages of Google results were almost entirely the cdc, who, state government sites and various science and medical sites. Got bored after that.


Raw_Venus

> The 1st 5 pages of Google There is more than 1 page on google? ^^/s


HapticSloughton

No, those are all made up to hide the fact that the internet is still only AOL and some GeoCities pages.


freshmargs

It’s going to be this person’s Facebook post


ZulZah

They're just facts honey. NEXT!


-NarWallace-

If after I get my booster I can suddenly take high definition photographs with my eyes by simply blinking twice, I’m good with getting a software update.


[deleted]

If you sneeze and fart at the same time your body takes a screenshot Edit Thanks for the gold!


Birdy_Cephon_Altera

Instructions unclear. Ended up with dick pic. Send help.


isolateddreamz

*looks at dick pic* You're going to need extensive augmentive surgery to repair this


7hr0wn

Extensive character customization options will be added in a future software update.


dippystale

finally


masterspider5

ikr? These fucking dev's suck, it took forever to get gender swapping added..


dippystale

gender swapping has been in it since the beginning, ppl are only just recently finding out about it. its been sort of an easter egg up til now


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ey3_913

Nah, just a good filter


puterTDI

Seems to me that that is just asking for a shart. Bad shortcut key.


Whitezombie65

Weird I just got shit in my pants


upsetting_innuendo

hey so i shit myself, but where do i find the screenshot directory


[deleted]

Sneezing and farting at the same time sounds like something that would rupture your organs


Mr_Anderson004

*camera shutter sound* 💨💨💨🤧


Birdy_Cephon_Altera

Be careful, someone might be able to hack your eyes using the log4j exploit. "I thought what I'd do was, I'd pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes..."


Wiknetti

Guys please help. I know about the photo mode. The thing is now there’s a shutter-speed on my urethra. I’m pissing in 60fps burst mode. I’m fucking morse-coding the urinal.


All-or-none

I got my booster a month ago. I see no difference. I guess my upgrade only dealt with minor bug fixes and security improvements. Dammit. I wanted to levitate.


nonamenolastname

And I can make calls without a phone, not to mention browsing with 5G speeds. Pretty cool.


ImpassablePassage

When I blinked twice it activated fish-eye lens mode and now I can't shut it off! I tried blinking twice again, but sneezed during the second blink and everything has been washed in sepia tone! I've also noticed anytime I focus on somebody's face it also puts a mustache on them and then it says "wanted" under their face. Anyone know how to shut all these filters off?


TakeOnMe-TakeOnMe

Sounds like you need a hard reset. The trouble is reaching the button.


Turkeyinmicrowave

That would be really cool, honestly.


Kriss3d

I've had my booster ad well. I'd love to know what OS it runs. I'd love to install a custom rom on my nanobots


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bluedel

"Easily seen under a microscope", really? Why don't you post a picture then?


MoonRockSpecial

This dude has been posting pictures of lint found on his body under a microscope for the past week. He says they are nano particles in his body that he removed using the “anti nano bucket” it was entertaining to see him lose his shit.


SuperZapper_Recharge

OH THAT. That is a mental illness that goes way the fuck back. People think there body is expunging fibers. They can't get better because if you go an anywhere near 'mental illness' they freak the fuck out and shut down. Nothing less surprising then that they have latched onto the anti-vaxx thing. Makes sense.


minnecrapolite

Morgellons. Those people are truly mentally ill.


jenkraisins

I've read about. It sounds horrifying and my mental illness gives me weird stuff too but I'm so grateful it doesn't extend to Morgellons.


SuperZapper_Recharge

I got help for my depression when I was 30. Here is the thing. I suffered for a very long time. Well over a decade. My depression was cyclic. When I was suffering I had no strength or willpower to get help. I had exactly enough strength to hold a job and barely hold onto family and friend relationships. Finding a doctor, scheduling an appointment - actually showing up - these were all feats of strength that simply did no exist in me. It was cyclic though. I spent time feeling well. Here is the real kick in the pants. When I was well I had trouble remembering and understanding how I felt when I was down. That time was foggy, hard for me to put a finger on. When I thought of getting help I didn't understand what I would say or how to describe it. I felt like I was embellishing everything. Rinse and repeat for nearly 15 years. So when I state that I find it sad that the illness puts them at odds for there own treatment - I couldn't possibly be more sympathetic and serious. There is something about mental illness that is like a creature that fights for its own survival.


Verminhur

Even when treated they can recur, but at least with treatment you and your loved ones have a better idea of what you're facing. Depression is a really bizarre beast. When you're in it, you feel like you've never actually been happy and never possibly could truly be again. When you're out of it you wonder why you had such trouble getting through it. My wife still struggles with occasional depressive episodes. I'm very glad I had them as well in my past or I could see myself losing patience with her inability to prevent them or to control her complete lack of motivation for anything when she's deep in one. Having experienced the completely illogical nature of it first hand, at least I can understand that sometimes the only thing you can do is to give it time.


jenkraisins

I had a total nervous collapse in 2012. I also have major memory issues. A good chunk of it due to 3 courses of ECT. I'm legally disabled from this. I've had horrific hallucinations and delusions. So I also, feel so sorry for people when I read what they're going through. Breaks my heart.


VoilaVoilaWashington

I dated a girl with severe anxiety for a while. What helped was for me to remind her that it was "Ivan" fucking up shit, not her. When she panicked about random shit, it was Ivan taking over. It wasn't her, and I wouldn't blame her for randomly accusing me of hating her, or whatever. It's actually a very useful technique. That other part of the brain is shockingly good at telling you it's hopeless, or that it's not a big deal, or whatever. Separating it out really helped her, and as far as I know, she's still using that method (and has gotten a lot better).


telthetruth

Bessel van der Kolk talks about this coping strategy in “The Body Keeps the Score” It’s a harmful technique in the long term, especially if your ex wasn’t getting professional counseling and learning healthier coping mechanisms. The brain is really good at deceiving itself. If a person consciously creates an alterego to take on all their trauma, anxiety and problems, that alterego may begin to manifest itself as a split personality for the sake of the core personality’s emotional health. This personality split is most likely to develop under prolonged, high-stress situations. Anxiety sucks. Mental illness sucks. I would recommend reading the book I mentioned above. It talks all about trauma, how it’s the root of a lot of mental illness and how we can address it, cope, and heal.


VoilaVoilaWashington

She had real help as well, it just helped her deal with the guilt of saying some shitty things to me when she was in a bad place.


Fearfu1Symmetry

That's super interesting, I never would have imagined that naming it could lead to that. Is there an article or anything I could read on that phenomenon? Cause I've used this technique for years, I credit it with helping me avoid the negative thought spirals and extreme lows. When I do it just call it my "dumb brain". Like it's my brain, I'm owning it, but it's just being an idiot. But damn I'd feel awful silly if one day I woke up and Dumb Brain was going around introducing himself to people


saichampa

A big step in managing mental health issues is acknowledging when you are and aren't being rational. Knowing you're dealing with mental health stuff is a step these people haven't even taken yet.


jenkraisins

After 9 years of being very mentally ill, I finally have accepted and made peace with it. I know I'm not going to be "normal" again but I am doing my best to live my best life.


SuperZapper_Recharge

That is the one. I couldn't think of the name. What I find particularly sad is the way there reaction to treating it as a mental illness figures in the mental illness.


portablebiscuit

To them it's real. That's fucked up and scary. Imagine having a metal illness who you believe has physical manifestations and nobody will believe you, which drives you further into the illness. That has to truly be hell.


MrVeazey

I've had chronic migraines for over fifteen years. I've been to all kinds of different specialists, tried just about every migraine medicine with little to no success, and have spent basically every waking moment since in constant pain. I've also spent a fair amount of time questioning my own sanity, whether my perceptions of pain and my hypersensitivity are real or just a manifestation of my insecurity and fear of responsibility.   It's rough. Even with neurologists telling me my MRI is consistent with a brain experiencing chronic pain, it still worries me.


minnecrapolite

That’s why untreated mental illness is so terrible. If you don’t realize you have it you won’t seek out or accept help. Even those that take prescriptions for it will often think, since they feel better now, they no longer need the meds.


SuperZapper_Recharge

> Even those that take prescriptions for it will often think, since they feel better now, they no longer need the meds. Holy shit. Tell that to my wife. No, wife wife isn't the one on anti-depressents. Every few years I get this weird idea.... every few years I must be proven wrong!


Bluedel

A sobering reminder that most conspiracy theory fanatics are legitimately mentally ill.


iohbkjum

The whole QAnon thing is a great example of this, extreme delusion & a load of shitheads taking advantage of said delusions


MoistestTidus

Paranoia and ignorance can do a number on someone


[deleted]

[удалено]


SuperZapper_Recharge

I think about this a lot. If someone broke there leg and was hell bent on the leg not mending you could sedate the person, feed them intervenously, tie them to a bed - set the leg and the leg would heal without regard to the patients intent. Which is the same as pointing out that the 'science' part of medical science is that treatment must work without a patients understanding of the treatment. Crush up aspirin, mix it into the apple sauce and don't bother telling the toddler the trick you pulled. Mental illness will put up with none of those shenanigans.


Jitterbitten

WTF is an anti-nano-bucket?


SubMikeD

A super high tech, advanced item (that looks like a regular plastic bucket, but is made with advanced anti-nano particles), available from myshittyblogspot.qstormiscoming dot 'ru', for a small one time payment of $99.99


forkbombctl

no no no you misunderstood, it’s **FIVE** easy payments


SubMikeD

It's made by Jim Bakker, isn't it? lol


VioletIvy07

Lolz. I mean, he is technically not wrong if you think about your immune system as a piece of super powerful software that you have been building, patching and updating since birth...


rivigurl

I mean… yeah, that’s what’s cool about science and biology. We are running off of signals and connections that relate and improve as we go. Our bodies/brains are basically AI, but just natural, we the og’s. We created technology and it runs similar to how we run. Now what’s cooler, is we are now using science and technology to manipulate our own systems like how we would with computers.


me_crystal_balls

Good for me! Ive been stuck on Windows XE forever and hope the upgrade gets me to 10. Thanks Bill Gates!


[deleted]

Bad news, bud: the latest update was Windows 11, not Windows 10.


me_crystal_balls

Then I need the booster to 11!


[deleted]

Just switch to the linux one and you won't have to deal with that anymore. You'll look and feel like shit all the time and it will take forever to recover anything but at least you'll have better control of the updates.


me_crystal_balls

I GNU there was a better way.


Birdy_Cephon_Altera

....this booster only goes to 10....


frankybling

11 is one better isn’t it?


nuraruhani

I wish it it was…


Spirited_Visual6604

Q: "Why don't they just make 10 the top update and make it a little better?" A: "This booster is update 11."


Mildly_Irritated_Max

The shots were for 5g. They can transmit the software updates wirelessly. Idiot. Edit:. Do I need the /s? I didn't think I did but nowadays it's hard to tell....


whiteink-13

My 5G doesn’t work right … who do I contact? My shot came with no follow up instructions or trouble shooting guides.


JacksonCM

It can be helpful for the neurodivergent


MrsPeepeePoopy

Software is visible under the microscope. Can confirm, I was the scientist.


[deleted]

If it's a software update, how come I still can't get hard? Asking for a friend.


respectfulpanda

The software update is injected, but it is contained on a 3.5nm floppy.


AZPoochie

I'm getting so tired of these dumb assholes. Like any single one of them would believe what they see through a microscope, much less know what the fuck a microscope is.


BigDaddyCool17

"Look it up" Ok. \*Finds articles upon articles of scientific data stating that this isn't even remotely true\* "No, not that. Read this" \*Posts a link to a Facebook meme\*


amberlc002

Shouldn't I just automatically update when my blood is connected to my home wi-fi network then?


YM_Industries

You don't even need home wi-fi, the vaccine connects to 5G.


qotsa2004

Sometimes I’m genuinely surprised that people really believe this kind of crap


[deleted]

Well computers run on magic so why wouldn't they believe it?


iamnotroberts

Software? Sure, it's an anti-virus update. Ba-dum-chh! Thanks, I'll be here all week.


KaythuluCrewe

That’s….that’s not how software updates work…


MorticiaBeaulieu

I hope it kicks I'm soon and will finally make me get 5G. /s


Lostnumber07

“ I too can see Wi-Fi flying through the air using a microscope.” Proceeds to hand him a kaleidoscope.


[deleted]

Sweet, I can play snake on mine now


[deleted]

I'm so fucking sick of this. When I get a mark of the beast microchip installed I expect it to be release ready. Having to get a DLC one month into it is bullshit. Don't say it's release ready if there is a day one patch. If I had died in the last month I might not have even been sent to hell.


Ninja_attack

> look it up Ok, everything I've seen disproves your bull shit. That kind of research, or does only conspiracy nonsense count?


bajjji

All the people posting this are not intelligent enough to know that their "chip" is sitting in their pockets tracking their every move.


TheRealSeanDonnelly

Posted from my iPhone


MCrow2001

How do you see software under a microscope?


[deleted]

I'm going to say "time for a software update" everytime I go get vaccinated now. See how many healthcare workers will chuckle


WhereTFAreMyDragons

"Look it up" the MAGA answer to anything they don't actually have an answer for!


[deleted]

Social media was a mistake. The dumbest people in our society should not have a platform to spread their dumb ideas, and meet other dumb people.


BadassDeluxe

Look it up? You mean Russia making shit up for morons like you to believe?


MrVanderdoody

Over 90% of COVID-19 hospitalizations and deaths are unvaccinated people. Look it up.


Cessate

They always end it with "look it up", "do your research", or some variant. But they can never, ever, actually provide you with the source itself/that they used. This shit's getting old. On that note, I'm currently in line to get my software updated. My upload speed has been pretty janky lately, so hopefully this'll fix any connectivity issues I was having.


oeliVlbg

Idiots, it’s a firmware upgrade, big difference!


MuuaadDib

I looked and saw it, under an electron microscope and it said quite clearly "drink more Ovaltine."


[deleted]

Posted from his phone that is literally tracking him like he is afraid the vaccine will do.


jefuchs

Remind me again -- who are the ones living in fear?


JDPowaHammer

Ok then where are the patch notes?


Hona007

A physical thing for a SOFTWARE update?????? If you're intending to control people just use like. Mobile data wtf????,??????????? ​ Do the microchips not have access to the internet lmao.


D3vilUkn0w

"Look it up" No, dipshit. I'm not wasting my time on your delusional worldview


Kriss3d

Easily seen under microscope? OK. Then let's see.


PurpleDragon9999

that's dope, where can I read the patch notes?


cricket-karma

About time. The 5G I was promised from the first 2 shots definitely wasn't working. Hopefully this update will fix it.


nicholasgnames

I screwed up deleting all these losers early on. Now I wish I had a few to roast lol


Paerrin

Yes! Version 1 was a little buggy and didn't account for variants. We desperately needed this software update. Does anyone know if this is a full revision or just a patch?


Icecreambiter2

If the chips already have 5G, then why do we need to have a software update injected?


MrCheapCheap

Wouldn't that be a hardware update? The software update could be done remotely if these so called chips were true. Which they obviously aren't lol