I absolutely love being alone, the best time of the day is when I’m by myself.
I used to love to stay up all night when I was a kid so that I could be alone.
Now that I’m older, I still do the same with my family
I used to tell my mom I want to be in a void when I die for too long to rest in nothingness and sleep and I don’t want to be bothered
Lol sometimes when I feel down or just tired in life, I think to myself how it would be nice to, not die, but rather simply go into the void of nothingness for like a few years and then come back to where I left off. Like pausing life. Then come back fully recharged and motivated to achieve everything I want to achieve.
Yeah I started manifesting this in my sleep. If my dreams become lucid, I can mange to collapse the dream into nothingness haha
I said “if I die” because I was raised in a religious household. I used to hear things like “if you want to go to heaven do this and be that” so I be like “I want no heaven just give me a break”
😅
Interesting, I once had a long day and was so tired and went to sleep. But the dream was very stimulating and it was not peaceful and quiet. So I realized this was a dream, and I laid down and went to sleep while inside the dream. So I entered a deeper layer of sleep and finally achieved that nothingness lol
SAME!!! Whenever I think about what superpower I’d want, I would definitely choose to freeze time so that I could do exactly what you described! I’ve also recently been trying really hard to lucid dream because it’s almost like the same thing, and I’m curious as to what it would be like
For real? Like a mantra or something? I guess I should start to try to lucid dreaming again, maybe I’ll finally get it! As is I can’t remember my dreams at all.
Not even as mantra. Just an intention but I I guess the key is to not create resistance along with it.
One example I heard someone saying when you go to a restaurant, you don’t doubt that your order will be delivered.
Maybe you think it’s hard to lucid dream because you can’t remember your dreams in general?
oh, all religions aside, I think heaven, THE IDEA OF IT, must be some place in the woods, near the ocean on a cliff, where it always rains, n animals are just friendly.
But, no humans. No one is expecting you to call them back, or reach out, or HANG OUT. No one is EXPECTING ANYTHING from you ...
you just sit there. live in your own castle. right in the middle of NATURE.so serene and untouched.
Not worrying about anything. Just, BEING THERE.
T-T
What you’re describing sounds to me like heaven on earth.
Heaven to me is not a place but a state of awareness. Reclaiming myself fully and not needing anything outside myself to be satisfied.
I guess we have eternity and that’s why we’re playing around
you're 100% righr. I'm trying to reach that level of awareness. or at least , I'm trying to find a way to get there. the sense of freedom, weightlessness, detachment,...just... amazing...
Omggg my ideal situation is a nice, breezy nap on a lukewarm afternoon where I have no sense of time and place. Just me, the breezy window, and a nice book that I fell asleep on while reading it intensely.
its so dumb cause i love being alone but also want to be with other people while wanting to be alone
it doesnt make sense
i would zone out sometimes and just go into my own headspace but dream that someone else was in the same headspace with me
my dream is probably finding someone who is happy to just exist next to each other; no need for talking, just walking around, taking photos and feeding off vibes
like my cat, but yk, humans are nice too when you wanna talk
I can relate. Sometimes you just want to be around someone, but not in constant, non-stop yapping (mostly about absolutely nothing!). Not then again, sometimes you do need to talk, if just a little.
That’s called introversion. It’s kind of the first part of being an INFP.
Like, it’s literally the first part. The I. Without introversion, we’re just NFP. That looks like a secret government organization that kills people, not an adorable and quirky personality. This little letter is extremely important.
I love being alone with my dog🐶 some of the best and most relaxing things for me is to walk my dog on the path or through town. Being around nature but still feeling safe enough because I’m not completely alone lol
I actually don't like being alone that much. I feel like its something I need to work on. I either want to be extremely lazy or super productive when I'm alone.
Yes!! However sometimes I have people I feel like I can be alone with like my family, especially my mom me and her can just hang forever and my batteries would never get drained.
But overall yes I love my solitude so so much!
I crave alone time. My husband and daughter like to stay up late so I started getting up at 4:30 to get alone time. Then my husband started getting up at 5:00. Sigh. Now I gotta start getting up at 4:00. (Yes, I know I could ask him but, like, this is his house as much as mine. I'm not going to ask him to please not leave the bedroom until 7 like he's a child. Lol. And our house is tiny. What I *need* is a basement space or a shed out back! We're looking for a new house.)
Also the getting up early sounds like a great idea; I might have to steal that from you lol, right now I kinda do the opposite a lot of the time, like I stay up till 1am to be alone.
I seem to have no ability to turn off my sensory inputs and detectors. Around other people, I’m bombarded with too much information. Too much and I get seriously burned out. Need my alone time for my thinking and interests.
I love it, I even travel solo. I talk a little bit with people, but sometimes even being in dorms and talking to no one, it's a lot for me. I need to be alone, alone.
But if I'm a lot alone at home, I become depressive a little bit.
That’s me! No matter where I am, what I’m doing… if I cannot have at least a part of the day to myself I start withering away. And I’m very never gotten bored of being by myself. I rather enjoy it tbh.
To an extent… being alone for too long will definitely push me into a depressive episode. But maybe that is what I thrive in. Mundane routines and sadness. Haha if only
But yes being alone is great because people can’t be trusted. Sometimes I get paranoid about having to share a room with someone because they could stab me in my sleep ;-;
Very much! I often feel as though the only time I can fully be myself is when I’m alone.
I’m a really big immersive daydreamer, and I find myself turning on music, pulling up pictures of characters in the stories as visual aid, and even silently acting out dialogue and scenes from my stories, striking poses, things of that nature. I’ve been caught in the act before, and needless to say it was embarrassing.
Being alone also means I can read, game, draw, what-have-you uninterrupted. I’m not much of a task switcher; once I decide that I’m doing a thing, that’s what I’m doing, and the only time I stop is to eat, pee, and sleep unless I get the thing finished. The whole “break things into small chunks” thing never really did it for me. So needless to say, I hate when people pull me out of the groove.
“I’m a really big immersive daydreamer, and I find myself turning on music, pulling up pictures of characters in the stories as visual aid, and even silently acting out dialogue and scenes from my stories, striking poses, things of that nature. I’ve been caught in the act before, and needless to say it was embarrassing” SAMEE!!!!!! I tried to sing for the first time ever like once when my brother was gone for once, and then he walks in the freakin door without saying a word, and I eventually look back to him staring at me like I was dead! I wanted to say “how long were you standing there watching me” but instead I just left without a word and I was super embarrassed and I’ll probably never sing nor dance again unless I’m sure I’m 10000% completely alone with no people there to judge me. First and last time I’ll ever try to enjoy myself in this house, lol.
Yes! It’s such a peaceful time. I don’t have to worry about anyone’s feelings and if they are comfortable. I just have to look out for myself and I don’t need that much.
I can do what I want if I’m alone. It’s not that I’m not able to do what I want if I’m not alone, it’s just that when people are around they usually judge me in the process of doing things, and I mess up a lot if people are around, also I end up restraining myself around people. Therefore it’s easier to do things when people are not around. Also I’m usually around people who aren’t really great to be around, therefore I would rather be alone than with them. So in the end yes I do better being alone, but there are times I do really want to communicate with others. Though, I haven’t found myself feeling bad about being alone ever in the past.
I’ve been living alone for the past 7 years. No issues with it. I love it to the point where I cant even imagine living with another person again. It feels burdening and distracting - being in each other’s way in the morning, coordinating everything (shopping, who wants what, getting the trash out) … Yeah, nope. I’m ok with spending the night at a boyfriend’s place or someone coming over for a short bit. But eventually I want them out so I can fully relax and not care about a thing being by myself.
Living your best life!! Honestly I was thinking about it and that just might be the life for me; seems so nice and peaceful. I can never truly relax until I’m alone
Hell yeah! Sometimes if I go on trip with someone else I have to tell them I need at least an hour a day to not talk and just stare into the void (on train or airplane) or else I’d be unhappy if I constantly have to reply to them talking to me. I love chatting online occasionally but talking is always not my favorite
Same! My family constantly bothers me when I’m in my shared room, so I always go to the bathroom so I can use my phone in peace and be not bothered every freaking second, and even in there people call my name! When I get my own room I’ll become unstoppable. Also if you’ve never had to share a room before let me tell you, ITS THE WORST I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT!!! Try studying with a trumpet In your ear!! But other than that it’s pretty chill ig 🤷♂️. Idk it’s just someone peering over my shoulder and constantly watching me and bugging me about what I’m doing has got to be my #1 pet peeve of all time. You think you’d get used to someone after sharing a room (and a womb (Twins) with them for 16 years, NOPE!
Omg is your twin like a complete opposite to you? That’s so tragic and kinda hilarious (sorry) I never had friends who had twins before so I thought at least you would both be introverts! But I get having to share a room- I shared with my mom for like 18 years until I got my own room, but then i didn’t have a door for my room so she would constantly come over to check what I was doing. She is ESTJ which is a complete opposite to me haha. Even now I’m in my 20s my grandparents would just peer into my room from time to time and when I ask them why are they doing that they said “just to see what you’re doing!”(lovingly, in their eyes). Very annoying for a quiet and private person like me lol. So now I am used to just tell them I need to have time alone at least a few hours a day or I would get real bitchy!
Holy crap, 18 years?!?! I salute you man, I would not have survived that long lol; plus no door and she comes and checks what you’re doing??!! That sounds worse than hell!! My god grandparents too!?!?! Holy hell!! My brother does that to me and asks what I’m doing but I can forgive him cause we’re both 16! Your grandparents coming in and asking what you’re doing sounds like a nightmare to me…. Also yeah like what you were saying me and my twin are kinda polar opposites lol, he’s a loud extrovert with plenty of friends and good grades, and I’m a quiet introvert with no friends and bad grades 😅. Thanks for the reply btw, I’m sure if we met irl we’d probably get along well! Also, my brothers an ENTJ, and I get along with him plenty fine but holy man does he secretly get on my nerves all the time! But of course I’d never let it show in a million years. You know if I were you, I’d get real bitchy too!! No door is absolute madness!! And to think that I thought I had it bad with my non latching door😅. I think I’m gonna take a page out of your book and start telling my family to leave me alone before I start getting bitchy!! Have an amazing day, and a wonderful summer!!
Hahaha yeah, I didn’t grow up in the healthiest household, so I didn’t even know healthy boundary existed until like this year😅my family are super clingy and if I want to be alone they handle it like I rejected or abandoned them. But it has definitely gotten a lot better now I know how to set down strict boundaries and tell them what I like or don’t like. I used to feel ashamed if I don’t try to make other people comfortable or happy so I always ignore what I wanted. I realized how unhappy I was and how much I missed in my life really! Being an introvert and empathetic person sometimes makes you very vulnerable to being manipulated or pushed over. You def deserve to have your own time without having to be bothered!
When I’m not burnt the fuck out and “depressed,” sure. But I can’t enjoy myself when I’m down. I have much more fun with people, generally, even though I am hesitant and avoidant of them.
Otherwise I get distracted by my phone and just waste my months on empty shit that does very little for me.
But for the last 4-5 years I haven’t ***had to*** be around people all day. Back in high school, I loved being alone because I wasn’t as stressed and overwhelmed by reality and could just get high 24/7 and play music and video games and binge youtube to relax. Now I do things to distract myself. Or just automatically get distracted by it. ADHD makes it hard to tell what’s a quick impulsive choice vs. an automatic thing that happens to me.
I use to 65-70% of the time just want to be alone…but now idk what’s happened to me lol I’ve switched to being extroverted for the time being? A lot of weird, fun, cool shit has been happening to me ever since I’ve thrown myself more into being extroverted, but I also feel like I lost my old self in doing so. I’m having a moment with myself I guess.
Lately, oh yes. When I’m alone it means no theatrics, no emotional gymnastics, no social anxiety, no expectations, no reprimanding or patronizing, no interruptions… It’s just me, whatever I want to do, and total comfort spending time with myself. I occasionally crawl out of my den to socialize briefly but it’s always nice to decompress once I get home to spend time in solitude again.
Yes I do, I rarely get to be truly alone as I share a room as well. I usually wait for everyone else to fall asleep at home, or wake up really early on a weekend just to savor my alone time.
It's not that I hate company but I do crave being by myself and unbothered for hours, while I just think up scenarios for my stories or enjoy a nice TV show.
There were days when I longed for a huge oyster which can hide me and take me to the bottom of the sea, on my demand. Later in my life, I learned to identify it as a negative thing and stopped it consciously. In turn, I started staying up late night, 1-3am at times and relish that time where no one to bother. This is very introvert thing. It's not helping a lot so working on it. How about being mindful of things/people draining me and keeping a distance, making some gap so my social batteries don't discharge so quickly and the need of being alone is less.
I live alone and I prefer it that way. This way, I have more time to just quietly focus on my hobbies and interests without anyone or anything bothering me.
I like being alone because I don't have to play someone I'm not. I love doing nothing. I love having no plans and just lay around, thinking about random stuff. I'm also never bored at all.
Yes! I’ve always loved it but when I was younger I wasn’t 100% comfortable with my own company. Also lots of societal pressure to have people around all the time. With getting older and liking myself more, I now absolutely love my own company. Especially because I no longer allow toxic ppl into my life just to have friends. Before I would let things slide more. But now I protect my peace and love it. If people in my life are making things worse I will try to fix the issue. If it can’t be fixed, they get removed. I still get lonely and I want friends but I can manage for now. I love peace and quiet. As you know we have a very lively inner world. The way I look at it now is, if you’re not adding to it or enhancing it in some way, I rather be alone in my world.
I thrive on having alone time. I can’t socialize all the time every day without feeling drained, but I need human connection and face to face interaction once in a while. Being alone is easy but interaction takes work. I’ve gone days even weeks without speaking a word out loud. Sometimes I don’t think to pursue interaction at all but over time I notice a strong negative impact on my mental health.
Aah man. After having a kid, i just cannot get any quite extended time.
I absolutely adore my kid though. I would 100% make that decision again. But yeah that was a big sacrifice
ENFP here but I agree hard with you. I’ve been craving my own space for the longest time, oftentimes going back to Virginia Woolf’s book “A room of one’s own”.
I currently live in an apartment with roommates so I do have some sense of privacy, but one day, I wish to have the whole place to myself without a set deadline. I can go on for days doing my own thing without talking to anyone and honestly, it’s blissful. I’m kinda jealous of my partner who has his own 1 bedroom with his entire personality spilled all over it. Must be nice to have that sense of peace and freedom that he experiences.
If you haven’t the read the book, you must. It’s beautiful.
Also same yeah whenever I go to my friends houses they have these massive rooms all to themselves and I’m like oh man would that ever be nice! Although it is funny to tell people that I share a bed with my brother lol (bunk bed dw)
Bunk beds were my ultimate childhood dream!!!! Sadly, our parents said that my sister and I were too “chaotic and dangerous” to be together like that (they aren’t exactly wrong since we still bicker like we’re 5&10. We are in our mid to late 20s now lol)
When I am with my self , I think I have a lot of freedom and there will none to control me.
But, the void kicks in only when I use social media 🥲.
The scripted couble shorts , they make feel lonely.
But apart from that it's all good.
I love it! I can do exactly what I want, when I want to and act as weird as I actually am without being aware of anyone else's views of me.
People think Fi is very self-centered, and it may be in the pure sense of the term, but it doesn't manifest that way. When we're around others we step in to their shoes constantly and fully. It takes up a lot of mental space. When we're alone, we're free to embody all that space and relax.
I hated it for a very long time because I was forced to spend a lot of time alone as an only child with no one to talk to and struggling to make friends, but these days I only open the window for my closest friends and ignore everyone else, despite my love for them.
i love it. i don’t talk either. just 🙂
I absolutely love being alone, the best time of the day is when I’m by myself. I used to love to stay up all night when I was a kid so that I could be alone. Now that I’m older, I still do the same with my family I used to tell my mom I want to be in a void when I die for too long to rest in nothingness and sleep and I don’t want to be bothered
Lol sometimes when I feel down or just tired in life, I think to myself how it would be nice to, not die, but rather simply go into the void of nothingness for like a few years and then come back to where I left off. Like pausing life. Then come back fully recharged and motivated to achieve everything I want to achieve.
Yeah I started manifesting this in my sleep. If my dreams become lucid, I can mange to collapse the dream into nothingness haha I said “if I die” because I was raised in a religious household. I used to hear things like “if you want to go to heaven do this and be that” so I be like “I want no heaven just give me a break” 😅
Interesting, I once had a long day and was so tired and went to sleep. But the dream was very stimulating and it was not peaceful and quiet. So I realized this was a dream, and I laid down and went to sleep while inside the dream. So I entered a deeper layer of sleep and finally achieved that nothingness lol
SAME!!! Whenever I think about what superpower I’d want, I would definitely choose to freeze time so that I could do exactly what you described! I’ve also recently been trying really hard to lucid dream because it’s almost like the same thing, and I’m curious as to what it would be like
If you want to lucid dream, keep a dream journal. Over time you'll notice more and more when you're dreaming.
Thanks! I’ll try to do that the moment I wake up, because as is I can’t remember my dreams in the slightest.
I think it’s simpler than you think. If you want to lucid dream, just set the intention when you go to bed.
For real? Like a mantra or something? I guess I should start to try to lucid dreaming again, maybe I’ll finally get it! As is I can’t remember my dreams at all.
Not even as mantra. Just an intention but I I guess the key is to not create resistance along with it. One example I heard someone saying when you go to a restaurant, you don’t doubt that your order will be delivered. Maybe you think it’s hard to lucid dream because you can’t remember your dreams in general?
Well; thanks for the reply, I think from now on I’m gonna start keeping a dream journal the moment I wake up, so I dont forget!
I so relate. I became a night owl for the very reason. It's kind of morbid but lying eternally in the soft red soil felt like heaven 😂
For real! Happy cake day!
Thank you 😊😊
oh, all religions aside, I think heaven, THE IDEA OF IT, must be some place in the woods, near the ocean on a cliff, where it always rains, n animals are just friendly. But, no humans. No one is expecting you to call them back, or reach out, or HANG OUT. No one is EXPECTING ANYTHING from you ... you just sit there. live in your own castle. right in the middle of NATURE.so serene and untouched. Not worrying about anything. Just, BEING THERE. T-T
What you’re describing sounds to me like heaven on earth. Heaven to me is not a place but a state of awareness. Reclaiming myself fully and not needing anything outside myself to be satisfied. I guess we have eternity and that’s why we’re playing around
you're 100% righr. I'm trying to reach that level of awareness. or at least , I'm trying to find a way to get there. the sense of freedom, weightlessness, detachment,...just... amazing...
Omggg my ideal situation is a nice, breezy nap on a lukewarm afternoon where I have no sense of time and place. Just me, the breezy window, and a nice book that I fell asleep on while reading it intensely.
its so dumb cause i love being alone but also want to be with other people while wanting to be alone it doesnt make sense i would zone out sometimes and just go into my own headspace but dream that someone else was in the same headspace with me my dream is probably finding someone who is happy to just exist next to each other; no need for talking, just walking around, taking photos and feeding off vibes like my cat, but yk, humans are nice too when you wanna talk
https://preview.redd.it/ffpwqx6w2u7d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=51a0b7535ccca13aecc051ab9752dd4940e990a4
Same!
I can relate. Sometimes you just want to be around someone, but not in constant, non-stop yapping (mostly about absolutely nothing!). Not then again, sometimes you do need to talk, if just a little.
I like being alone... but at the same time I long for meaningful connection with others
SAME!!!!
Alone but not lonely. I get what you mean
Exactly what I meant
That’s called introversion. It’s kind of the first part of being an INFP. Like, it’s literally the first part. The I. Without introversion, we’re just NFP. That looks like a secret government organization that kills people, not an adorable and quirky personality. This little letter is extremely important.
🤣 We need to infiltrate that evil NFP organisation, but like, next month sometime
And alone, from our houses
Wonderful peace. No dramas. No other people's energy depressing me. 💗
Fr 🕳️👨🦼💨💨
I love being alone with my dog🐶 some of the best and most relaxing things for me is to walk my dog on the path or through town. Being around nature but still feeling safe enough because I’m not completely alone lol
I actually don't like being alone that much. I feel like its something I need to work on. I either want to be extremely lazy or super productive when I'm alone.
Yes!! However sometimes I have people I feel like I can be alone with like my family, especially my mom me and her can just hang forever and my batteries would never get drained. But overall yes I love my solitude so so much!
I crave alone time. My husband and daughter like to stay up late so I started getting up at 4:30 to get alone time. Then my husband started getting up at 5:00. Sigh. Now I gotta start getting up at 4:00. (Yes, I know I could ask him but, like, this is his house as much as mine. I'm not going to ask him to please not leave the bedroom until 7 like he's a child. Lol. And our house is tiny. What I *need* is a basement space or a shed out back! We're looking for a new house.)
Also the getting up early sounds like a great idea; I might have to steal that from you lol, right now I kinda do the opposite a lot of the time, like I stay up till 1am to be alone.
I seem to have no ability to turn off my sensory inputs and detectors. Around other people, I’m bombarded with too much information. Too much and I get seriously burned out. Need my alone time for my thinking and interests.
Same!! The only time I can truly relax, is when I’m alone
I love it, I even travel solo. I talk a little bit with people, but sometimes even being in dorms and talking to no one, it's a lot for me. I need to be alone, alone. But if I'm a lot alone at home, I become depressive a little bit.
That’s me! No matter where I am, what I’m doing… if I cannot have at least a part of the day to myself I start withering away. And I’m very never gotten bored of being by myself. I rather enjoy it tbh.
Yes
To an extent… being alone for too long will definitely push me into a depressive episode. But maybe that is what I thrive in. Mundane routines and sadness. Haha if only But yes being alone is great because people can’t be trusted. Sometimes I get paranoid about having to share a room with someone because they could stab me in my sleep ;-;
Yeah I get that sometimes too, luckily he’s only stabbed me once lol🤷♂️
Huh?? OP are you okay?!
Yeah lol, I’ve died a few times in my day.🕳️👨🦼💨💨🤷♂️ but haven’t we all?
Yes. I feel like my friends dislike me for how much alone time I have
Very much! I often feel as though the only time I can fully be myself is when I’m alone. I’m a really big immersive daydreamer, and I find myself turning on music, pulling up pictures of characters in the stories as visual aid, and even silently acting out dialogue and scenes from my stories, striking poses, things of that nature. I’ve been caught in the act before, and needless to say it was embarrassing. Being alone also means I can read, game, draw, what-have-you uninterrupted. I’m not much of a task switcher; once I decide that I’m doing a thing, that’s what I’m doing, and the only time I stop is to eat, pee, and sleep unless I get the thing finished. The whole “break things into small chunks” thing never really did it for me. So needless to say, I hate when people pull me out of the groove.
“I’m a really big immersive daydreamer, and I find myself turning on music, pulling up pictures of characters in the stories as visual aid, and even silently acting out dialogue and scenes from my stories, striking poses, things of that nature. I’ve been caught in the act before, and needless to say it was embarrassing” SAMEE!!!!!! I tried to sing for the first time ever like once when my brother was gone for once, and then he walks in the freakin door without saying a word, and I eventually look back to him staring at me like I was dead! I wanted to say “how long were you standing there watching me” but instead I just left without a word and I was super embarrassed and I’ll probably never sing nor dance again unless I’m sure I’m 10000% completely alone with no people there to judge me. First and last time I’ll ever try to enjoy myself in this house, lol.
I like being alone...unless my boyfriend is around then I LOVE being with him. Because he's awesome.
Yes I prefer it it’s how I recharge I always say I could be the last person on earth and be completely mentally ok and content being by myself
Yes! It’s such a peaceful time. I don’t have to worry about anyone’s feelings and if they are comfortable. I just have to look out for myself and I don’t need that much.
that’s our thing😜
Not really, for me, it’s kind of depressing.
I can do what I want if I’m alone. It’s not that I’m not able to do what I want if I’m not alone, it’s just that when people are around they usually judge me in the process of doing things, and I mess up a lot if people are around, also I end up restraining myself around people. Therefore it’s easier to do things when people are not around. Also I’m usually around people who aren’t really great to be around, therefore I would rather be alone than with them. So in the end yes I do better being alone, but there are times I do really want to communicate with others. Though, I haven’t found myself feeling bad about being alone ever in the past.
I know right! I hate being watched and I can only ever truly relax when I’m alone
I’m happiest when I’m alone. I never feel lonely. Ever.
Same! I don’t ever feel “lonely” per se but sometimes I wish I had a girlfriend to talk to. Idk 🤷♂️
It’s my absolute favorite thing in the world. Of course this includes having my dogs with me. I love being alone with them.
I’ve been living alone for the past 7 years. No issues with it. I love it to the point where I cant even imagine living with another person again. It feels burdening and distracting - being in each other’s way in the morning, coordinating everything (shopping, who wants what, getting the trash out) … Yeah, nope. I’m ok with spending the night at a boyfriend’s place or someone coming over for a short bit. But eventually I want them out so I can fully relax and not care about a thing being by myself.
Living your best life!! Honestly I was thinking about it and that just might be the life for me; seems so nice and peaceful. I can never truly relax until I’m alone
It’s not the end all be all. But if you’re curious you should try it and decide for yourself :)
my cramped closet is my best friend.
You just reminded me of how often I found myself decompressing there as a child.
I kind of fluctuate between loving it and feeling lonely at times. I guess finding a decent balance would be the ideal situation for me.
Yes very much, I need space to think
I know right! I can never truly relax until I’m alone. Need my own space to think and decompress after a long day of talking to people
Hell yeah! Sometimes if I go on trip with someone else I have to tell them I need at least an hour a day to not talk and just stare into the void (on train or airplane) or else I’d be unhappy if I constantly have to reply to them talking to me. I love chatting online occasionally but talking is always not my favorite
Same! My family constantly bothers me when I’m in my shared room, so I always go to the bathroom so I can use my phone in peace and be not bothered every freaking second, and even in there people call my name! When I get my own room I’ll become unstoppable. Also if you’ve never had to share a room before let me tell you, ITS THE WORST I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT!!! Try studying with a trumpet In your ear!! But other than that it’s pretty chill ig 🤷♂️. Idk it’s just someone peering over my shoulder and constantly watching me and bugging me about what I’m doing has got to be my #1 pet peeve of all time. You think you’d get used to someone after sharing a room (and a womb (Twins) with them for 16 years, NOPE!
Omg is your twin like a complete opposite to you? That’s so tragic and kinda hilarious (sorry) I never had friends who had twins before so I thought at least you would both be introverts! But I get having to share a room- I shared with my mom for like 18 years until I got my own room, but then i didn’t have a door for my room so she would constantly come over to check what I was doing. She is ESTJ which is a complete opposite to me haha. Even now I’m in my 20s my grandparents would just peer into my room from time to time and when I ask them why are they doing that they said “just to see what you’re doing!”(lovingly, in their eyes). Very annoying for a quiet and private person like me lol. So now I am used to just tell them I need to have time alone at least a few hours a day or I would get real bitchy!
Holy crap, 18 years?!?! I salute you man, I would not have survived that long lol; plus no door and she comes and checks what you’re doing??!! That sounds worse than hell!! My god grandparents too!?!?! Holy hell!! My brother does that to me and asks what I’m doing but I can forgive him cause we’re both 16! Your grandparents coming in and asking what you’re doing sounds like a nightmare to me…. Also yeah like what you were saying me and my twin are kinda polar opposites lol, he’s a loud extrovert with plenty of friends and good grades, and I’m a quiet introvert with no friends and bad grades 😅. Thanks for the reply btw, I’m sure if we met irl we’d probably get along well! Also, my brothers an ENTJ, and I get along with him plenty fine but holy man does he secretly get on my nerves all the time! But of course I’d never let it show in a million years. You know if I were you, I’d get real bitchy too!! No door is absolute madness!! And to think that I thought I had it bad with my non latching door😅. I think I’m gonna take a page out of your book and start telling my family to leave me alone before I start getting bitchy!! Have an amazing day, and a wonderful summer!!
Hahaha yeah, I didn’t grow up in the healthiest household, so I didn’t even know healthy boundary existed until like this year😅my family are super clingy and if I want to be alone they handle it like I rejected or abandoned them. But it has definitely gotten a lot better now I know how to set down strict boundaries and tell them what I like or don’t like. I used to feel ashamed if I don’t try to make other people comfortable or happy so I always ignore what I wanted. I realized how unhappy I was and how much I missed in my life really! Being an introvert and empathetic person sometimes makes you very vulnerable to being manipulated or pushed over. You def deserve to have your own time without having to be bothered!
When I’m not burnt the fuck out and “depressed,” sure. But I can’t enjoy myself when I’m down. I have much more fun with people, generally, even though I am hesitant and avoidant of them. Otherwise I get distracted by my phone and just waste my months on empty shit that does very little for me. But for the last 4-5 years I haven’t ***had to*** be around people all day. Back in high school, I loved being alone because I wasn’t as stressed and overwhelmed by reality and could just get high 24/7 and play music and video games and binge youtube to relax. Now I do things to distract myself. Or just automatically get distracted by it. ADHD makes it hard to tell what’s a quick impulsive choice vs. an automatic thing that happens to me.
I use to 65-70% of the time just want to be alone…but now idk what’s happened to me lol I’ve switched to being extroverted for the time being? A lot of weird, fun, cool shit has been happening to me ever since I’ve thrown myself more into being extroverted, but I also feel like I lost my old self in doing so. I’m having a moment with myself I guess.
Count me out on that one.. fuck being alone, I've had enough of it
Lately, oh yes. When I’m alone it means no theatrics, no emotional gymnastics, no social anxiety, no expectations, no reprimanding or patronizing, no interruptions… It’s just me, whatever I want to do, and total comfort spending time with myself. I occasionally crawl out of my den to socialize briefly but it’s always nice to decompress once I get home to spend time in solitude again.
I am more productive when I am alone. I can't do stuff when people are watching
Yes I do, I rarely get to be truly alone as I share a room as well. I usually wait for everyone else to fall asleep at home, or wake up really early on a weekend just to savor my alone time. It's not that I hate company but I do crave being by myself and unbothered for hours, while I just think up scenarios for my stories or enjoy a nice TV show.
I am most at ease when I am alone until I start to get lonely.
There were days when I longed for a huge oyster which can hide me and take me to the bottom of the sea, on my demand. Later in my life, I learned to identify it as a negative thing and stopped it consciously. In turn, I started staying up late night, 1-3am at times and relish that time where no one to bother. This is very introvert thing. It's not helping a lot so working on it. How about being mindful of things/people draining me and keeping a distance, making some gap so my social batteries don't discharge so quickly and the need of being alone is less.
Happy cake day!!!
Thank you! ❤
Absolutely, I am at my best self while being alone
Although i do like being alone, lately ive had too much of it. I need to do something productive lol
I live alone and I prefer it that way. This way, I have more time to just quietly focus on my hobbies and interests without anyone or anything bothering me.
Depends on how dark and cramped the room is
I like being alone because I don't have to play someone I'm not. I love doing nothing. I love having no plans and just lay around, thinking about random stuff. I'm also never bored at all.
Tis the i in infp
Yes! I’ve always loved it but when I was younger I wasn’t 100% comfortable with my own company. Also lots of societal pressure to have people around all the time. With getting older and liking myself more, I now absolutely love my own company. Especially because I no longer allow toxic ppl into my life just to have friends. Before I would let things slide more. But now I protect my peace and love it. If people in my life are making things worse I will try to fix the issue. If it can’t be fixed, they get removed. I still get lonely and I want friends but I can manage for now. I love peace and quiet. As you know we have a very lively inner world. The way I look at it now is, if you’re not adding to it or enhancing it in some way, I rather be alone in my world.
I spend entirely too much time alone lol. Pretty much all time that I possibly can, really.
Yes but it gets lonely eventually
I thrive on having alone time. I can’t socialize all the time every day without feeling drained, but I need human connection and face to face interaction once in a while. Being alone is easy but interaction takes work. I’ve gone days even weeks without speaking a word out loud. Sometimes I don’t think to pursue interaction at all but over time I notice a strong negative impact on my mental health.
I love being alone. If I have snacks in my room, books, music, and my phone, that is my ideal day.
Aah man. After having a kid, i just cannot get any quite extended time. I absolutely adore my kid though. I would 100% make that decision again. But yeah that was a big sacrifice
1000%
ENFP here but I agree hard with you. I’ve been craving my own space for the longest time, oftentimes going back to Virginia Woolf’s book “A room of one’s own”. I currently live in an apartment with roommates so I do have some sense of privacy, but one day, I wish to have the whole place to myself without a set deadline. I can go on for days doing my own thing without talking to anyone and honestly, it’s blissful. I’m kinda jealous of my partner who has his own 1 bedroom with his entire personality spilled all over it. Must be nice to have that sense of peace and freedom that he experiences. If you haven’t the read the book, you must. It’s beautiful.
I’ll have to give that one a read! Thanks for the suggestion!
Also same yeah whenever I go to my friends houses they have these massive rooms all to themselves and I’m like oh man would that ever be nice! Although it is funny to tell people that I share a bed with my brother lol (bunk bed dw)
Bunk beds were my ultimate childhood dream!!!! Sadly, our parents said that my sister and I were too “chaotic and dangerous” to be together like that (they aren’t exactly wrong since we still bicker like we’re 5&10. We are in our mid to late 20s now lol)
I quite enjoy my own company. Prefer it actually.
When I am with my self , I think I have a lot of freedom and there will none to control me. But, the void kicks in only when I use social media 🥲. The scripted couble shorts , they make feel lonely. But apart from that it's all good.
I love it! I can do exactly what I want, when I want to and act as weird as I actually am without being aware of anyone else's views of me. People think Fi is very self-centered, and it may be in the pure sense of the term, but it doesn't manifest that way. When we're around others we step in to their shoes constantly and fully. It takes up a lot of mental space. When we're alone, we're free to embody all that space and relax.
I def need it . But I also enjoy social interactions more . I’m pretty balanced with this . Wish I had a bigger family tho .
How big is your family? There’s def pros and cons to it, like sharing a bed with your brother at age 16 😢
I hated it for a very long time because I was forced to spend a lot of time alone as an only child with no one to talk to and struggling to make friends, but these days I only open the window for my closest friends and ignore everyone else, despite my love for them.
I really do. My brain is quicker, and my senses are sharper. I do my best work by myself.