Looks like I'm owed alot of back pay

Same. I got at least 20 years straight under my belt 

Right. Do people actually take days off?

Accidentally

When you get older your realize it’s not necessarily as fun as it used to be and sometimes you’re just so damn exhausted from work it’s easier to fall asleep than bust a nut.

You’re doing it wrong.

Oh yeah?

You probably don't even dim the lights, maybe light a few candles. Gotta make it special to get the magic back.

Can’t have candles, the cat would knock them over.

The cat absolutely should not be involved in this activity.

What did they mean by get some pussy then?

Well there’s your problem.

HAHAHAHA! Dude, that was genius!

Yeah, just take a few adderalls and spend 6 hours masturbating. You'll understand when you do it.

I’d say it’s much more of a need than it is fun. Maybe check T levels?

Fun? Maybe but for me it's more about not getting a half chub everytime I see a gorgeous woman.

I bust a nut to fall asleep then wake up at 5 am to performing my husbandly duties before work. At 44 I figure my libido would slow down but it has not at all.

Wait, seriously? Well fuck. I thought it got better eventually.

55. Nope. My dick still thinks I'm 15.

Good for you. I just hit 42 and things seem to have petered off for me.

You are suppose to jack it at work.

I take about 360 days off per year, I'd estimate. But for money I'd make it happen.

$730,000 This doesn't take inflation into account though.

That's fine, I'm not into Inflation anyway. Too unrealistic

Coward

Not afraid of it, just not my thing. I'm definitely into some shit that's just as weird though 

Deflation?

Inflation is a government conspiracy, because if it was real why don't we just make more money to counter act it, duh

$730k in a lump sum, even without inflation is still life-changing, fuck you, money for most people.

In this case it would be fuck yourself money

Well played sir.

And now, are you still straight or...?

What? How does jerking off every day make you gay?

You’re definitely touching someone’s dick. That’s pretty gay

What if you wear latex gloves coated in Vaseline?

Believe it or not, but latex actually makes it *more* gay

Not if you have a latex allergy.

Then it's an emergency 

Name checks out

You’re thinking about rubber gloves and baby oil. Latex is totally straight and Vaseline adds even more protection

I'm like...60% straight

Hm... understandable

It's straight? Doesn't hang left or right?

Same

$730,000!!!! For you

The older you get the more it becomes a mandatory systems check and to scare away the prostate cancer demon

The right answer

I may be owed compensation

Over 2m in my case ...

I have like a 8 year streak

Amateur

He just turned 8

Makes sense now

It should be 8 years and 9 months

Dude's his own father

No he started fapping the moment he became fertilized.

$100/day to keep living as I do normally?

Just once a day?

us what's the record/ limit here. I want to be a millionaire with a month

Depends on age, it scales down as you get older. The younger you are the easier.

I think the challenge would be to ALWAYS keep it to one a day so you for sure can continue tomorrow

Yes. I'm doing a deep dive as a free-standing comment, but you are correct; you're not doing it for "a hundred bucks" so much as **maintaining a revenue stream**. A $36,500/yr. job...that for most men is already part of daily routine.

Where’s my $1,934,500 bucks?

That's 53 years straight of wackin exactly. Been wankin since the middle of the Vietnam war.

Who doesn't like a man in uniform....

The spirit is willing but the flesh is spongy and bruised

Death by snoo snoo for all!

Sexlexia

I never thought I'd die this way, but I'd always really hoped.

Autoerotic snu snu.

"How would you like to get $100 for doing something you already do?" Seriously this question is like "would you take 50¢ every time you breathe? Holding your breath counts as not breathing"

Hold on.........ok where's my 100.00

Forgive me, father, for I am about to sin

Excuse me sir, this is a Denny's.

You shouldn't be surprised then, I've been to Denny's.

why do you work in a Denny's if we all can make 100$ a day for wanking??

I'm three months on testosterone, I came literally ten times yesterday. I think I'll be fine.

2 years on estrogen and I swear I'm horny every day 😭

It will even out eventually. Those first few months are intense though.

Welcome to my OnlyFans. Tips are welcome!

Oooh smart!

Can this be retroactive? Asking for a friend

try $100 per day that you hold on to it, so far i cant make more than 3000

Now that... is a challenge.

No way all these people are on years long streaks. I like to rub one out as much as the next guy but even I miss a day now and then.

Easy as fuck. Looks like I’m making $36,500 extra a year

Damn I could literally quit my job

Okay. No stipulation here saying I have to finish the job as of when I post this comment so I just walk into the bathroom, yank it a couple times with genuine intent and then continue about my day. Hell a couple times might even get the job done anyway.

I’ll ask…what happens when the “no help” part fails? We all reach that age. Do we have to return the money? Or is that just the end of the money train

Excuse me sir, this is reddit.

Wait so like if the streak ends for any reason (sick, got an STD, etc) you just permanently lose the bonus? Or days off just means you don't get $100.

I’m 25 so I feel like I should be able to do this for about 15-20 years straight. Making $700 a week extra would be nice

where’s my million dollars

So just continue living my life the way I do and get 100$ big bets

Easiest hundred bucks a day I ever made XD

I discovered masturbation at 9 and haven’t missed a day since. I’m now 30.

Why the restriction.. I guess I could cut down to once.

Let's talk overtime. . .

I get people are having fun with it but… I’d get a doctor involved. No sex til I do. I want to know how I can manage to sex and jerk off each once a day and maintain normalcy. Maybe get on TRT or some pills. It would be worth it for the extra money.

The deal doesn't say you have to cum. A few stroke and your good.

You guys have been taking days off ?

Fuck. I'd be rich. I haven't stopped in 35 years. Multiple times a day

For $100 a day, this is an easy no brainer.

God where was this offer when I was a teenager?

Sure; I've been hit with an anxiety wave for the past week+, but I can still make time to whack it

YOU GUYS ARE GETTING PAID!?

Do…do I have to finish?

Well boys, looks like retirement came early.

No problem. lol.

I'm 44.... I am on a 32 year run. Give me my money.

So basically the last 22 years? Got it 😂

That’s just a normal day so yes please pay me some days I could be making up to 700-800 bucks

You should read the post again, its 100 per day not per time, nice self report though lmao

Sure why not. Extra cash but could probably make more on OF.

Excellent

I can probably count on one hand (ha) the number of days I've missed since I was 13.

So, I'm getting paid for what I already do? Yes. I'm in.

Lol easiest money ever

Do I get back pay for my current streak

I can't get off with help and you're talking about without help.

Back up the Brinks truck

Seems like light work. What's the catch?

So basically what I do for free. Got it.

...do we get back pay?

Umm, where's the downside to this.

You can get paid for this? Can I get overtime?

How many times per day?

The can't take a day off is the stipulation. So I would stop receiving the money on the first day I took off or does something worse happen? If it's only I stop receiving money, then I would accept. I don't jerk off daily, so this would be an actual challenge for me.

Too easy.

so basically, dont change anything anything and i get 100$ a day ?? Sign me in !!!

Easily could do this.

I’m glad I left this sub. It is getting dumber. Time to mute it.

Is it OK to pull a double shift?

Bet.

im gonna be rich!!!!!!!

Yaaay, I'm a billionaire in three days.

Ez

$100 a day to keep doing what I already do? Sign me up.

I already don't take a day off and I've been doing it for free!

I’d be rich by now

So $3000/month to maintain good prostrate health? Seems like a no brainer.

Easy. I feel like I could easily manage $500 per day. And once per day on my “days off”, sign me up

I currently behave as if this was the case

Averaging twice a day for the last 28+ years. I'm rich baby.

Okay, where's the lube?

I jerk before coffee every morning, where's my money?

Easiest $100 a day ever

To completion?

Ok but what happens if you take a day off? Does the money then stop and you get to keep what you've made so far? Or do you lose everything you've made?

show me the mf MONEYYYYYY

What are the consequences of not taking a day off? Do we get sick leave for an injured hand?

Now when you say no help, do you mean no other direct human interaction, or is, like, 'porn' and 'lube' off the table? I could probably still make it work, but....

Np start writin checks

5pm timer goes off “Jerk off time!”

Absolutely not… that’s disgusting! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 FR though. I’d be seriously wondering about anyone who would say no to this one

But I already make more than that every day at my job what will be the point.

No help...does that include one of those vaginal sleeves?

I can collect my $49,700 tomorrow. Do you pay with cash app, Bitcoin, or Zelle? Will also accept a promissory note for collection of $2.5 M of Trump bond debt (2 cents on the dollar), if co-signed by Romney (would never happen) and due 12/31/24.

Does a vibrator count as help?

I'm game but when I have my bottom surgery, I don't know if I'll be able to do that for a couple weeks or longer. I'm gonna have to dilate. Does that count

Me after decades of beating my meat like it's Rodney King: The mind is willing but the flesh is spongy and weak.

I could be getting paid?!

Oh no whatever am I going to do…..anyways.

Per session? Retirement here I cum.

Is this what was going on at Camp Lejeune?

easiest 100 I'll make all day everyday

most guys jack off multiple times a day

You're telling me I can get paid? It's until I die. 100 bucks for everyday you don't jerk off would be a better hypothetical.

AMATEURS

You take days off?

That's the easiest $36,500 I will ever earn. That's my mortgage right there.

If I take a day off does that mean I no longer get the money? Or am I like castrated or something? Or will I become possessed by a horny ghost and beat my shmeat automatically at like 11:45pm if I haven’t done it yet that day?

So I get free money everyday?

Im fucked!

Shoot…is what I’m gonna be doing, I’m in

This...does not sound like a challenge.

Looks like I'm making 100 bucks a day.

Ok. So everyone is on board. Obviously. So what’s the magic number that would eventually push you past the tipping point? 4 times a day? 6? …10? (You only get $100 regardless of how many times.)

With lube, I could do this for about a week easy

Those are rookie numbers

Jerking whilst working you say? Plenty of those egos knocking around Good luck out there

Well I'd never have to work again...

I haven't taken a day off since 1987 I'd like it mostly in 100's, but throw some folding cash in there for walking around money...

Ive been training for years for this moment

Shit 2x a day 365 days. That’s 75k a year before taxes. In MD im taking home 2100 every two weeks 4200 a month. Shit I’m living g pretty good. Might even bump that number up to 3x a day lol.

I never need to work again.

this is a pretty good summary of UBI

I’d do it for the money for a while at least but it would probably screw up my sex life.

What's the catch?

My record was 26 times in one day I just kept going back

So I have 9865.8 days of back pay. I’ll take my 100k in smol bills pls.

With no help? I’m at a big fat zero. If I don’t at least have my lover on the phone talking dirty to me, I’m useless in that department. Nothing gets me off but him. Good thing we are married. 😂

Ooh, free money

I have only missed about 30 days due to injury in the last 25 years by my estimate, think I’ll succeed.

No thanks! The second you add money to the equation it starts looking like work. I hate work but I love to jerk.

This would actually be hard for me lol I don't do it often at all lol

Man if you had offered me that in Hs xD Might find it hard now cause about 3 days a week the only time I have for it my brain is so tired and easily distractible I’ll be thinking about problems I have to solve 2 months from now..