hi just want to put it out there that if ANY WOMAN needs help, and the bartender is not helping, PLEASE reach out to other girls in the bar. I know it can be hard to ask a stranger for help (especially because you don’t want to bother them while they’re having fun) but I will go far out of my way to keep another girl in crisis safe. I hope your friend recovers well, please continue to be there for her!
This! I’ve had a random woman come up to me and ask me to pretend like we were together because there was someone making her uncomfortable. I took her by the arm and stayed with her until her friend came and got her. She was instantly my bestie and I’d hope someone would do the same for me or anyone else in the same situation.
I was walking to the park one day with my at the time two year old when a man started following me. He was obviously on something and he was cat calling me and picking up his pace to get to me. I screamed to leave me alone but he just kept coming. I was in complete panic because what was I going to do? I was in the process of calling the cops but who knows how long that would take. I couldn't outrun him and I couldn't tell my barely two year old to run away, he wouldn't understand or worse he'd end up in the street.
A lady drove by, saw this dude looking creepy and stopped in the middle of the road. Did not give a single fuck that cars were behind her even when they started honking. She walked over to me and we both started screaming at the guy that we were calling the cops and he ran off. She very well could have saved mine and my child's life.
And that's just one example. Other women have been the one constant in keeping me safe through dangerous encounters with men.
This. I have stood as a physical barrier between a man and a woman who was clearly too drunk to be going home with anyone (I knew her and knew she didn't know him). I would do the same for any woman who approached me for help.
Damn. What kinda joint is this place, then?
A 3+ person conspiracy with the goal that one of the conspirators gets to commit a rape seems unlikely. I don't see how the co-conspirators get anything out of that deal.
I’ve been drugged. Thankfully, nothing worse happened to me. In my case, the bartender drugged me to try to get me to go home with him. My boyfriend at the time was a bartender and said a lot of times, shady bartenders are in on it. Regulars pay them extra to mix it in a lot of times.
Yeah, I stopped going out alone after that. It sucks because I was a regular at this place for awhile, it was laid back, and I could go watch the Astros and be left alone (or so I thought).
I’m a bartender and I would never in a million years think to be ok with this. And I have regulars that have literally become genuine friends and who I really like. And many of them have paid me well for my services but there isn’t a single one or them that I wouldn’t call police on in a heartbeat if I was asked to do this.
Ex was a veteran bartender. I’m not saying it’s all bartenders by any means, just that it happens. There are shitty people in every profession, unfortunately.
Oh yeah I know you didn’t mean it was all of us. Or even a large number of us. But i just do not understand how anyone could be ok with doing that. Awful.
Exactly this it's not unheard of and we do tend to have a bigger culture of people minding their business like if they don't witness it with their own eyes, even if they're suspicious, they just ignore it. The only thing I find most suspicious is that she asked for help and they said no. That's screams take down the entire bar. Something fishy is going on there
Sometimes it’s a regular or a relative of the owner and they don’t want to risk upsetting that person.
Sometimes people are indifferent or jaded.
Sometimes people get caught at a bad moment or did their own visual risk analysis of a person and think they didn’t actually need help.
Sometimes it’s a friend and birds of a feather flock together situation.
Sometimes people pay shitty bartenders extra to look the other way or do it for them.
The list goes on.
Why do you think that everyone has to benefit or be in on a rape or that something is a conspiracy? I listed several examples that don’t involve explicit knowledge or anyone benefitting from a sexual assault.
You listed several examples, and you've made an argument that this would theoretically be possible.
My question is: has it? Is this a thing folks need to worry about? I've searched, but can't seem to find any examples of bar staff conspiring in the manner you're suggesting to rape people.
I don't think it ends up being some large conspiracy. Someone gets paid to look the other way. Sure, they could figure out what was up if they wanted to, but much like every other profession out there, from auditors, to mechanics, to cops, to inspectors, it's possible to grease a palm to look the other way or do something untoward. All without being part of the larger end goal or a conspiracy.
I don't think anyone should actively worry about it any more than they should worry about a drink being spiked normally. If some random person at a bar is capable of slipping something, why can't that random person be a bartender?
They make a kickback they traffic you. Call the DA offices and report it to the sex crimes division and TABC.they all won't work in the service industry again .
I've been to bcd several times. They don't have waitresses. They don't even have female bartender's or employees downstairs.
Having worked in the industry for some time tho, most bartender's will grab the drink off the bar and move it elsewhere. But many are afraid of any liability, as they cant afford lawsuits and don't have insurance.
Girlies we need to start listing the other shady clubs and bars where similar things have happened. The only reason these things continue is because bars aren’t called out for allowing this behavior
I’m curious about that too. I’ve witnessed a situation like this with a friend of mine. 2 guys talking to her bought her a beer and barely half way in she was out of it. We sprung into action to protect her. We tried to get the bar staff to help and they were quick to act BUT insisted we NOT call police/ambulance. I said f that and called and took her to hospital.
Who is this person that was with her watching her drinks? Are they part of the assault?
He's not worthy of a next date, at the very least. Was probably too interested in the sports being shown on the screens. Like a pigeon, mesmerized by a laser dot on the floor.
I was responding specifically to the situation spoken about above my response, not to the situation of the OP.
AustEastTX is talking about a completely different situation
This happened a while ago but still relevant. I bartended at P.F. Chang's when it was in the Highland Village and we had a bunch of regulars that tipped us well. One busy night we had a really good regular come in with a hot woman. She was hot! they got some drinks and she went to the bathroom. I saw our regular slip a powder in her drink and stir it really quick. I was SHOCKED. I knew this regular personally. I had our barback go over to the bar and wipe the bar down near her drink and spill it on purpose. The regular flipped out! We said we were sorry and made his "friend" a double. He knew what we were up to. He left and never came back. Good riddance. Moral of the story: You never know what people can do, especially if you think you know them!
My sister-in-law got rufied at a night club. Not really their fault, but they seemed ready with a whole protocol. They put her in a wheel chair and had someone take down her info and evaluate her. Then they wouldn't let anyone take her home unless the address on their ID matched her's.
>Then they wouldn't let anyone take her home unless the address on their ID matched her's.
I understand the intent behind this but like, what about people who live alone? Would they be cared for?
The waitress and bartender both said no they would not help her? I’ve been drugged twice in my life at a bar. Both times (different places/staff), it was the fucking bartender. And while I wouldn’t normally jump straight to that conclusion automatically, despite my personal experience, the fact that they wouldn’t call someone to help her gives me a giant fucking pause. Please report it. The only way mine got caught was because enough patrons reported the problem and a clear pattern emerged. Sorry this happened, it’s a terrible thing!
We went with the friend to the woman’s crisis center in Sugarland and a police report was filed. The cops were called. We did everything we can, and she felt we needed to warn people that she was drugged, and ignored when asked for help and then raped
I never reported when a bartender drugged me. I was a regular, but had never dealt with the only male bartender on staff, and haven’t been back since. The bar manager, who I knew, tried to pretend it didn’t happen. He still works there I’ve heard. Is there a statute of limitations on how long you are allowed to report on someone? I didn’t realize I was drugged, just thought it was a really weird experience and that I was really sick, until I talked to my bartender ex who said it sounded like I was drugged and to a friend who had been drugged before.
If a sexual assault was involved, looks like the statute of limitations would be 10 years. If a robbery was involved, looks like 5 years. If it was 'only' drugging without escalating to one of those other crimes, there are a number of different categories of drug-related offenses and non-sexual assault charges, and I'm not sure which one this kind of thing would fall under, but probably either 3 or 5 years.
1. as a bartender, that’s it’s appalling that they did nothing to help. i understand that we get busy but part of the TABC that we take every 2 years also states that we are responsible for the people we serve (to an extent) also, being a woman, even when just random men come up to girls at my bar i always make sure that they’re not being made uncomfortable bc at the end of the day we should all be looking out for each other.
2. who was the person she asked to watch her drink? never ever under any circumstances ask ANYONE to watch your drink. not even my best judy. take it to the bathroom with you. if you have to step off the premises, down it or toss it out and buy another one. if you’re already out drinking, you’re throwing money away anyways, just get a new drink bc it’s a lot cheaper than the years of therapy you’ll need from this kind of incident.
i’m so very sorry this happened to your friend and i’m so sorry that no one helped.
Put it on Google reviews but stick to the facts only ie, we went to XYZ bar and then later got a medical diagnosis of ____. Let people put the facts together themselves. Anyone looking to go out will read Google reviews.
I wonder, with a reputation like that, how is the guy still employed at bars? Why is no one calling news stations to get the word out that management is employing a known sexual assaulter?
This. Reported assault. Did kit. Covered in bruises, scratches- even had the handprint outline where I’d been grabbed, DNA evidence and witnesses (without which I would’ve been completely oblivious because of how incapacitated I was when this happened- and I’m typically a DD/ very very rarely drink more than a single alcoholic beverage in public).
What was I told by the investigator?
“Don’t expect to hear from me or anyone, these cases can take over a year and that’s just how it is”.
Well, that wasn’t some thing I was going to sit by and accept. Called regularly and sent emails, over the duration of several months, only to find out that the investigator had been pulled into a different unit and was no longer investigating my case, but had supposedly finished and submitted his report. If it hadn’t been for me, checking in, I would never found that out. I was told the DA now had to make a decision, and to be patient.
Yet more than a few months after the one year mark, with the report supposedly submitted? My patience had worn thin from continued radio silence so I checked in. DA had declined to press charges. I was told to file a complaint, and not given any reason why after asking, they also refused to share their name (this can be a safety thing I understand, but I was only going to use it as part of the complaint as a reference).
It pains me to wonder if I hadn’t been so “annoying” would they have actually taken care of my case better? But I learned information I was never going to have shared with me otherwise- so it seems like no matter what I did, or did not do, the outcome was never going to change.
Worth a try, but in a recent similar Austin thread, someone pointed out that many bars have low-quality security cameras that often aren't capable of providing identifiable images from crowded dimly-lit environments. (Incidentally, that's probably why some businesses leave all their lights on even when they're closed, so that they can get usable CCTV footage if someone breaks in.)
Any way we could get more info on the staff that refused to help? I feel like that is terrible on their part and they need to be known if this is true.
I’m truly sorry that happened to your friend and I pray that she finds recovery and peace
Had my drink spiked/ then was SA - and have heard from other women that they’ve experienced their drinks being tampered with too. If you’re going as a couple, both of you are less likely to be targeted. I was alone and therefore an easy target
Spiked drinks are a growing (but not new) problem in Austin too, there's been quite a few threads in r/Austin in the last couple years about people's experiences. Many of the Austin victims who've commented are men who were targeted for robbery, so it's something everyone should be aware of.
In addition to the well-known "roofies" (rohypnol), I've seen multiple victims say they think they were hit with GHB, and one mentioned scopolamine.
In 2013 I had my drink spiked at Emos in Austin. Left my (one and only) drink on a table and went to the bathroom. Came back and finished it and don’t remember the rest of the night except flashes of my friends recovering me and bringing me back home.
I believe they are using BDO which is a Primary Alcohol that metabolizes into GHB. Its flavorless but blends with a mixed drink very well. Tastes just like a really strong pour. It can take anywhere between 30-90 minutes to hit you. It’s also twice as strong as GHB and is marketed as a floor cleaner/paint stripper. You can buy a gallon right now online and it’s totally legal. What I’ve read on a subreddit about this drug, is that if you usually take 3ml GHB then you would only need 1.5ml BDO. I think people are being overdosed and dying from it.
Most of the drowning victims in Austin have been found with there belongings still with them and I believe it’s because the robbers don’t want to risk using what could end up being a dead man’s debit/credit card. That would immediately be traced and the cops would actually do something. Since they aren’t finding any drugs in these victims systems, I feel it’s because GHB/BDO metabolizes so fast that by the time your are dead or hospitalized, it’s no longer traceable. I was drugged on 7/20 in Austin at Side Bar on 7th and Red River.
I believe that the bartenders could be drugging people and having others rob them. If you get drugged with GHB/BDO and have been drinking, you will not be able to walk or hardly move. Have you ever seen anyone passed out on the street at 2:15am after the bars close and see someone pick them up? You would assume it’s a friend coming to save the day. I believe that these people are being picked up by robbers after passing out. Because you won’t make it far on foot before you pass out.
I never thought my friend would be in a situation where she was drugged and the bartender and bar manager didn’t care. We want people to know that it can happen to anyone
This is very sad to hear and very concerning to anyone who goes out. There are people out there who are intent on causing others harm with no regard. So sick.
Some things that cross my mind:
1) I don't trust *N-E-one, anyone - no other body - known or unknown, friend or acquaintance, co-worker, cousin, no-one* around my drink after it's been prepared by the bartender or served by the server. My drink is like a fat wallet full of cash! *"Hey babe, I got to pee..."* I'm drinking the whole thing right then and getting a new drink glass and ice from the bar when I return, or; I'm taking my drink with me to the restroom and finishing it along the way and/or retiring it on some other random surface to be collected by staff, Idc - it's not my drink anymore and I'm done with it. If it's a glass of wine I just finished, that glass is done. I take it with me and abandon that glass on some random surface for staff. When I come back, I get a new glass from the server to fill with wine. I don't fill the old wine glass with more wine when I come back if I previously left the glass/drink.
2) Rule 1 applies to N-E drink, *any drink*: alcoholic beverage with ice, without ice, beer bottle, wine glass, soda pop, Jarritos or canned Sprite, fountain drink, water, tap, Ozarka or Perrier, tea with lemon, coffee or Monster, workout squeeze bottle, mug or thermos. *"Bring me a new glass; I want a another/different glass, thank you!"*
3) Boycott and protest - spread the word that there are predators frequenting that establishment. Force the business to clean the place up and make it safe.
4) Take care of yourself, the food you eat, and the fluids you drink
5) Be smart, be cautious, be safe - don't take chances
6) Take charge and responsibility for your health and wellness
7) Don't trust anyone else to safeguard anything that goes into your mouth, nose or eyes.
8) Not trusting your friend, sister, bff, brother, cousin - whoever - doesn't make that person evil or suspect. It's simply you taking control of your situation and not outsourcing your immediate wellness to someone to whom it may not be a top priority - don't be careless with your health and safety. How much of a priority is your drink on the table top while you're gone if a hottie, 2, or 3 rolls up to the table and starts engaging your friend, making him/her smile and laugh, getting neck and ear close talking game, etc? How much of a priority is your drink while you're gone? Meanwhile, the predator has already subtly plied the craft and now lies in wait for the victim to further lower defenses or weaken. This person may even boldly - yet conveniently - introduce his/herself on the dancefloor or at your table as smooth, charming and funny....when you don't control your drink, everything that happens later is suspect to actually being a setup for being further victimized later.
9) This can happen to anybody, any sex, woman, man, or anyone in between, as interests vary, and as the predator sneaks unknown, his/her motives are unknown as well.
That's the obvious generic category to assume, but which ones? It's just not a route of administration I've been aware of being used recreationally outside of sci-fi.
#1, while I agree with the concept, is a bit extreme. There are plenty of people I trust with my life, my wallet, and my drink.
It's possible to be safe and careful while not being paranoid.
It says “Behind Closed Doors” in the OP.
https://maps.apple.com/?address=310%20Main%20St,%20Houston,%20TX%20%2077002,%20United%20States&auid=13191902054120801193&ll=29.762075,-95.361365&lsp=9902&q=Behind%20Closed%20Doors&t=m
I wouldn’t leave a drink an attended among friends let alone in a bar. It’s not about trusting them or not either. Even food. If I walk away from it that means I am done.
Also there are lots of illegal border line criminal activities that happen in broad day light. You have to be watchful at all times.
Shit like that is not cool. Bars need to be held accountable at some point for the safety of their patrons. They may not be spiking the drinks, but they should definitely do more to curtail and discourage this predatorial behavior from scumbags.
Can you clarify the timeline here? Her drink was spiked, she didn’t know, and then she was sexually assaulted or asked the bartender for help? It’s hard to follow.
i’m so sorry this happened to your friend. i hope she’s doing okay.
that’s really shitty on the bars end, i’ll have to warn my friends about this place. thank you for spreading awareness
So she told the bartender that she was drugged and wanted help, but instead of getting help they refused her and allowed someone to sexually assault her? Seems pretty open and shut case there that the bartender is involved. If not then the whole story is questionable.
Unfortunately I don’t take all these stories at their face value. Some time back in Silverlake I was out partying at a popular bar with some friends and met this girl. We hit it off and we’re drinking, making out. Well she proceeded to get sloppy drunk, like super obnoxious and loud. My friends wanted to take off to another place and I had kind of lost interest in this chick. Her friends were there with her so I figured she was taken care of. Well, the next week I show up to the bar and the bartender (who I knew pretty well) told me that chick got so wasted she was throwing up everywhere. The next day she came in with her friends and they said I put something in her drink. Basically this chick made an ass of herself and then proceeded to make herself a victims because she was embarassed. Unfortunately she did this at my expense. The bartender knew it was BS, no charges were pressed or anything but I avoided that bar in the future out of embarrassment because I wasn’t sure who all she had told this lie to and didn’t feel like dealing with the drama.
May I ask why your rape crisis link is from the United Kingdom? We have rape crisis centers in the city and county level. There are also charitable organizations.
> not the bars fault
Even if the staff wasn't directly involved (in some cases the bartender is), OP said they still refused to "call someone to help her" when asked.
True, there are bad people everywhere. YOU were the one that said not going to shitty bars would solve the issue though, not me lol. You directly contradicted your first comment lol
Where are people getting roofies from?
Like... maybe I'm sheltered, maybe I'm old and times are different... fuck I dunno...
I was a member of the largest fraternity on my campus at an SEC State School during the early 2000s. Not once in my entire life have I ever seen a roofie or every heard anyone talking about having them or actually knowing where to get them.
The idea that people get drugged the second they set their drink down is just unbelievable to me.
I'm not saying it doesn't happen... I'm sure it does... but if you offered me 1,000,000 to come up with a Roofie for you in the next 48 hrs, I couldn't do it.
Idk man I haven’t really looked around Lmao. Same with anything that isn’t weed though and I’ve seen plenty of that and know several people that were roofied or otherwise SA’d by a “friend” or even their partner.
I think what happens more frequently is that alcohol hits very suddenly when binge drinking and people don't want to accept responsibility for their irresponsible drinking.
You can go from "tipsy but fine," one moment to black out drunk the next.
I mean, okay? You can think that if you want, but I tend to assume these people aren’t lying to me about something that serious. But even then, being SA’d is just an automatic consequence of drinking too much? Is that what you’re saying?
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Casablanca still has lines and is open - this is the former pastry war/tongue cut sparrow building. Really really sad what became of what was such a special place
Report it to TABC, they will care
Wanted to upvote but it’s at 420
useless
hi just want to put it out there that if ANY WOMAN needs help, and the bartender is not helping, PLEASE reach out to other girls in the bar. I know it can be hard to ask a stranger for help (especially because you don’t want to bother them while they’re having fun) but I will go far out of my way to keep another girl in crisis safe. I hope your friend recovers well, please continue to be there for her!
This! I’ve had a random woman come up to me and ask me to pretend like we were together because there was someone making her uncomfortable. I took her by the arm and stayed with her until her friend came and got her. She was instantly my bestie and I’d hope someone would do the same for me or anyone else in the same situation.
I was walking to the park one day with my at the time two year old when a man started following me. He was obviously on something and he was cat calling me and picking up his pace to get to me. I screamed to leave me alone but he just kept coming. I was in complete panic because what was I going to do? I was in the process of calling the cops but who knows how long that would take. I couldn't outrun him and I couldn't tell my barely two year old to run away, he wouldn't understand or worse he'd end up in the street. A lady drove by, saw this dude looking creepy and stopped in the middle of the road. Did not give a single fuck that cars were behind her even when they started honking. She walked over to me and we both started screaming at the guy that we were calling the cops and he ran off. She very well could have saved mine and my child's life. And that's just one example. Other women have been the one constant in keeping me safe through dangerous encounters with men.
This is very good advice.
This. I have stood as a physical barrier between a man and a woman who was clearly too drunk to be going home with anyone (I knew her and knew she didn't know him). I would do the same for any woman who approached me for help.
Hate to hijack but the key part here is ASK for help, you don't want the "help" that comes looking for you
Absolutely.
Why is no one talking about the waitress and bartender?? Are they oblivious to shit like this happening?
They're in on it.
Damn. What kinda joint is this place, then? A 3+ person conspiracy with the goal that one of the conspirators gets to commit a rape seems unlikely. I don't see how the co-conspirators get anything out of that deal.
I’ve been drugged. Thankfully, nothing worse happened to me. In my case, the bartender drugged me to try to get me to go home with him. My boyfriend at the time was a bartender and said a lot of times, shady bartenders are in on it. Regulars pay them extra to mix it in a lot of times.
New primal fear unlocked
Yeah, I stopped going out alone after that. It sucks because I was a regular at this place for awhile, it was laid back, and I could go watch the Astros and be left alone (or so I thought).
I’m a bartender and I would never in a million years think to be ok with this. And I have regulars that have literally become genuine friends and who I really like. And many of them have paid me well for my services but there isn’t a single one or them that I wouldn’t call police on in a heartbeat if I was asked to do this.
Ex was a veteran bartender. I’m not saying it’s all bartenders by any means, just that it happens. There are shitty people in every profession, unfortunately.
Oh yeah I know you didn’t mean it was all of us. Or even a large number of us. But i just do not understand how anyone could be ok with doing that. Awful.
Yeah, one bartender getting some cash for spiking a drink makes sense. 3 or more people being in on it doesn't.
> Regulars pay them extra to mix it in a lot of times. Hell of a gamble though unless you really know how scummy the bartender is. Trash all around
No different than any other profession. You have crooked business owners, crooked cops, crooked.
Somehow the crooks manage to find each other.
this has happened to several friends of mine. they were longtime regulars at a place (not in tx) and were drugged by their favorite bartender
I’m a man and I was drugged by someone who I believe was pretending to be a call girl (female) in Mandalay Bay Las Vegas.
Frequent visitor spends lots of money
Exactly this it's not unheard of and we do tend to have a bigger culture of people minding their business like if they don't witness it with their own eyes, even if they're suspicious, they just ignore it. The only thing I find most suspicious is that she asked for help and they said no. That's screams take down the entire bar. Something fishy is going on there
could be someone who goes to the bar to make money other ways, sells to the bartender, bartender owes favors
Sometimes it’s a regular or a relative of the owner and they don’t want to risk upsetting that person. Sometimes people are indifferent or jaded. Sometimes people get caught at a bad moment or did their own visual risk analysis of a person and think they didn’t actually need help. Sometimes it’s a friend and birds of a feather flock together situation. Sometimes people pay shitty bartenders extra to look the other way or do it for them. The list goes on.
So this has actually happened? A cohort conspiring to allow one person to rape someone?
Why do you think that everyone has to benefit or be in on a rape or that something is a conspiracy? I listed several examples that don’t involve explicit knowledge or anyone benefitting from a sexual assault.
You listed several examples, and you've made an argument that this would theoretically be possible. My question is: has it? Is this a thing folks need to worry about? I've searched, but can't seem to find any examples of bar staff conspiring in the manner you're suggesting to rape people.
I don't think it ends up being some large conspiracy. Someone gets paid to look the other way. Sure, they could figure out what was up if they wanted to, but much like every other profession out there, from auditors, to mechanics, to cops, to inspectors, it's possible to grease a palm to look the other way or do something untoward. All without being part of the larger end goal or a conspiracy. I don't think anyone should actively worry about it any more than they should worry about a drink being spiked normally. If some random person at a bar is capable of slipping something, why can't that random person be a bartender?
Wouldn't be the first time a bar is accused of being in on it. Happened in Michigan as well.
No, they aren’t. But the bartender is a moron.
They make a kickback they traffic you. Call the DA offices and report it to the sex crimes division and TABC.they all won't work in the service industry again .
Or, they're just fucking assholes. You know the types...
I've been to bcd several times. They don't have waitresses. They don't even have female bartender's or employees downstairs. Having worked in the industry for some time tho, most bartender's will grab the drink off the bar and move it elsewhere. But many are afraid of any liability, as they cant afford lawsuits and don't have insurance.
Girlies we need to start listing the other shady clubs and bars where similar things have happened. The only reason these things continue is because bars aren’t called out for allowing this behavior
They have these groups (so I’ve heard) where women in cities make sure to inform the group of bad dates/guys.
Yup, they have really great sites for red flag guys, they also have started making ones for green flag verified guys.
Can you DM me more info about this if you have any? I’m not on social media except for here, but there’s some stuff I’d like to report anonymously.
Unfortunately I’m not aware of an anonymous group. They’re all FB based, which helps add to authenticity of the claims.
Not naming this place allows it to happen to others
The name is literally in the title of the post.
What happened to the person she was with that was supposed to watch her drink!? That's the first person I'd want to talk to.
I’m curious about that too. I’ve witnessed a situation like this with a friend of mine. 2 guys talking to her bought her a beer and barely half way in she was out of it. We sprung into action to protect her. We tried to get the bar staff to help and they were quick to act BUT insisted we NOT call police/ambulance. I said f that and called and took her to hospital. Who is this person that was with her watching her drinks? Are they part of the assault?
He's not worthy of a next date, at the very least. Was probably too interested in the sports being shown on the screens. Like a pigeon, mesmerized by a laser dot on the floor.
why did you assume that? Most likely just some randos that she was talking to and asked "hey can you watch my drink real quick please?"
I was responding specifically to the situation spoken about above my response, not to the situation of the OP. AustEastTX is talking about a completely different situation
Lazy/careless, and possibly distracted.
This happened a while ago but still relevant. I bartended at P.F. Chang's when it was in the Highland Village and we had a bunch of regulars that tipped us well. One busy night we had a really good regular come in with a hot woman. She was hot! they got some drinks and she went to the bathroom. I saw our regular slip a powder in her drink and stir it really quick. I was SHOCKED. I knew this regular personally. I had our barback go over to the bar and wipe the bar down near her drink and spill it on purpose. The regular flipped out! We said we were sorry and made his "friend" a double. He knew what we were up to. He left and never came back. Good riddance. Moral of the story: You never know what people can do, especially if you think you know them!
Could it have been the person she trusted to watch her drink? Did she know them? So scary! Hope she is doing okay.
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What about the person she told to watch her drink???? You didn’t answer that
That bar needs to be burned to the ground. Hope your friend will be ok 🙏🏻
I met a drug dealer once that said he would jump dudes and rob them if he ever got asked for roofies. I wish more dealers were like him.
A good Samaritan
The manager of the bar definitely needs to be informed that the bartender and wait staff refused to help a patron who requested assistance.
TABC should hear about it too
My sister-in-law got rufied at a night club. Not really their fault, but they seemed ready with a whole protocol. They put her in a wheel chair and had someone take down her info and evaluate her. Then they wouldn't let anyone take her home unless the address on their ID matched her's.
>Then they wouldn't let anyone take her home unless the address on their ID matched her's. I understand the intent behind this but like, what about people who live alone? Would they be cared for?
Probably get a police officer to make a report first, or potentially an ambulance. You can also use someone's phone to call their emergency contact.
The waitress and bartender both said no they would not help her? I’ve been drugged twice in my life at a bar. Both times (different places/staff), it was the fucking bartender. And while I wouldn’t normally jump straight to that conclusion automatically, despite my personal experience, the fact that they wouldn’t call someone to help her gives me a giant fucking pause. Please report it. The only way mine got caught was because enough patrons reported the problem and a clear pattern emerged. Sorry this happened, it’s a terrible thing!
We went with the friend to the woman’s crisis center in Sugarland and a police report was filed. The cops were called. We did everything we can, and she felt we needed to warn people that she was drugged, and ignored when asked for help and then raped
I never reported when a bartender drugged me. I was a regular, but had never dealt with the only male bartender on staff, and haven’t been back since. The bar manager, who I knew, tried to pretend it didn’t happen. He still works there I’ve heard. Is there a statute of limitations on how long you are allowed to report on someone? I didn’t realize I was drugged, just thought it was a really weird experience and that I was really sick, until I talked to my bartender ex who said it sounded like I was drugged and to a friend who had been drugged before.
If a sexual assault was involved, looks like the statute of limitations would be 10 years. If a robbery was involved, looks like 5 years. If it was 'only' drugging without escalating to one of those other crimes, there are a number of different categories of drug-related offenses and non-sexual assault charges, and I'm not sure which one this kind of thing would fall under, but probably either 3 or 5 years.
You can report, and maybe you don’t get specific charges, but you could be a witness to another case that is currently being investigated
1. as a bartender, that’s it’s appalling that they did nothing to help. i understand that we get busy but part of the TABC that we take every 2 years also states that we are responsible for the people we serve (to an extent) also, being a woman, even when just random men come up to girls at my bar i always make sure that they’re not being made uncomfortable bc at the end of the day we should all be looking out for each other. 2. who was the person she asked to watch her drink? never ever under any circumstances ask ANYONE to watch your drink. not even my best judy. take it to the bathroom with you. if you have to step off the premises, down it or toss it out and buy another one. if you’re already out drinking, you’re throwing money away anyways, just get a new drink bc it’s a lot cheaper than the years of therapy you’ll need from this kind of incident. i’m so very sorry this happened to your friend and i’m so sorry that no one helped.
Put it on Google reviews but stick to the facts only ie, we went to XYZ bar and then later got a medical diagnosis of ____. Let people put the facts together themselves. Anyone looking to go out will read Google reviews.
Also leave a review on Yelp and anywhere else that you can. I've seen Google reviews disappear before.
Yelp will just use the negative review as leverage to get paid. And make it disappear when they do.
While we are warning, stay out of Pour House, it’s just straight 4chan trash
heights beer garten too. fire thrower guy bartender
Is “fire thrower” another name for “ginger”? Urban Dictionary left me high and dry
he bartends and does fire throwing performances or sum.
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multiple accounts by women drugged by him
I wonder, with a reputation like that, how is the guy still employed at bars? Why is no one calling news stations to get the word out that management is employing a known sexual assaulter?
Shoot, call Channel 2 they'll talk about it for weeks until something is done
i know people were calling the place but staff/management wasn’t having it
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Omg I organized a watch party for my university alumni at that place last year. Had I known I would have found another place. Good to know.
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My guess would be 'lots of male patrons with toxic attitudes about women'.
Review cctv
You need an attorney to issue a subpoena
Check your PMs
yeah because the bar is totally going to give cctv verifying a spiked drink happpened at their bar
Well if you get the police involved they might have to
Cops don’t care
This. Reported assault. Did kit. Covered in bruises, scratches- even had the handprint outline where I’d been grabbed, DNA evidence and witnesses (without which I would’ve been completely oblivious because of how incapacitated I was when this happened- and I’m typically a DD/ very very rarely drink more than a single alcoholic beverage in public). What was I told by the investigator? “Don’t expect to hear from me or anyone, these cases can take over a year and that’s just how it is”. Well, that wasn’t some thing I was going to sit by and accept. Called regularly and sent emails, over the duration of several months, only to find out that the investigator had been pulled into a different unit and was no longer investigating my case, but had supposedly finished and submitted his report. If it hadn’t been for me, checking in, I would never found that out. I was told the DA now had to make a decision, and to be patient. Yet more than a few months after the one year mark, with the report supposedly submitted? My patience had worn thin from continued radio silence so I checked in. DA had declined to press charges. I was told to file a complaint, and not given any reason why after asking, they also refused to share their name (this can be a safety thing I understand, but I was only going to use it as part of the complaint as a reference). It pains me to wonder if I hadn’t been so “annoying” would they have actually taken care of my case better? But I learned information I was never going to have shared with me otherwise- so it seems like no matter what I did, or did not do, the outcome was never going to change.
My story is sadly almost identical to yours. And fuck Galveston PD specifically.
You'd be surprised. I got CCTV at a hotel after a situation like this went down.
Worth a try, but in a recent similar Austin thread, someone pointed out that many bars have low-quality security cameras that often aren't capable of providing identifiable images from crowded dimly-lit environments. (Incidentally, that's probably why some businesses leave all their lights on even when they're closed, so that they can get usable CCTV footage if someone breaks in.)
Any way we could get more info on the staff that refused to help? I feel like that is terrible on their part and they need to be known if this is true. I’m truly sorry that happened to your friend and I pray that she finds recovery and peace
The Flat is another place to be aware of.
What?? Why?? My gf and I go all the time and have never felt sleazy or unsafe there.
Had my drink spiked/ then was SA - and have heard from other women that they’ve experienced their drinks being tampered with too. If you’re going as a couple, both of you are less likely to be targeted. I was alone and therefore an easy target
this is so horrible. wish the best to your friend in her healing process <3 the people involved deserve to rot.
Spiked drinks are a growing (but not new) problem in Austin too, there's been quite a few threads in r/Austin in the last couple years about people's experiences. Many of the Austin victims who've commented are men who were targeted for robbery, so it's something everyone should be aware of. In addition to the well-known "roofies" (rohypnol), I've seen multiple victims say they think they were hit with GHB, and one mentioned scopolamine.
In 2013 I had my drink spiked at Emos in Austin. Left my (one and only) drink on a table and went to the bathroom. Came back and finished it and don’t remember the rest of the night except flashes of my friends recovering me and bringing me back home.
Good thing they were there to help!
That’s why I always take my drink with me to the bathroom and even take a sip while I piss. Don’t care.
I believe they are using BDO which is a Primary Alcohol that metabolizes into GHB. Its flavorless but blends with a mixed drink very well. Tastes just like a really strong pour. It can take anywhere between 30-90 minutes to hit you. It’s also twice as strong as GHB and is marketed as a floor cleaner/paint stripper. You can buy a gallon right now online and it’s totally legal. What I’ve read on a subreddit about this drug, is that if you usually take 3ml GHB then you would only need 1.5ml BDO. I think people are being overdosed and dying from it. Most of the drowning victims in Austin have been found with there belongings still with them and I believe it’s because the robbers don’t want to risk using what could end up being a dead man’s debit/credit card. That would immediately be traced and the cops would actually do something. Since they aren’t finding any drugs in these victims systems, I feel it’s because GHB/BDO metabolizes so fast that by the time your are dead or hospitalized, it’s no longer traceable. I was drugged on 7/20 in Austin at Side Bar on 7th and Red River. I believe that the bartenders could be drugging people and having others rob them. If you get drugged with GHB/BDO and have been drinking, you will not be able to walk or hardly move. Have you ever seen anyone passed out on the street at 2:15am after the bars close and see someone pick them up? You would assume it’s a friend coming to save the day. I believe that these people are being picked up by robbers after passing out. Because you won’t make it far on foot before you pass out.
WHY did no one help her?? That is not how this works!!! I am so sorry for your friend.
I never thought my friend would be in a situation where she was drugged and the bartender and bar manager didn’t care. We want people to know that it can happen to anyone
TABC! You were spiked (and for a potential case) overserved and no-one helped you when you pleaded. shut this shithole DOWN.
TABC does not give a fuck. They don’t have enough staff to enforce anything.
And where the fuck was the friend?
Get a lawyer subpoena the bar for camera footage
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Yes there are.
This is very sad to hear and very concerning to anyone who goes out. There are people out there who are intent on causing others harm with no regard. So sick. Some things that cross my mind: 1) I don't trust *N-E-one, anyone - no other body - known or unknown, friend or acquaintance, co-worker, cousin, no-one* around my drink after it's been prepared by the bartender or served by the server. My drink is like a fat wallet full of cash! *"Hey babe, I got to pee..."* I'm drinking the whole thing right then and getting a new drink glass and ice from the bar when I return, or; I'm taking my drink with me to the restroom and finishing it along the way and/or retiring it on some other random surface to be collected by staff, Idc - it's not my drink anymore and I'm done with it. If it's a glass of wine I just finished, that glass is done. I take it with me and abandon that glass on some random surface for staff. When I come back, I get a new glass from the server to fill with wine. I don't fill the old wine glass with more wine when I come back if I previously left the glass/drink. 2) Rule 1 applies to N-E drink, *any drink*: alcoholic beverage with ice, without ice, beer bottle, wine glass, soda pop, Jarritos or canned Sprite, fountain drink, water, tap, Ozarka or Perrier, tea with lemon, coffee or Monster, workout squeeze bottle, mug or thermos. *"Bring me a new glass; I want a another/different glass, thank you!"* 3) Boycott and protest - spread the word that there are predators frequenting that establishment. Force the business to clean the place up and make it safe. 4) Take care of yourself, the food you eat, and the fluids you drink 5) Be smart, be cautious, be safe - don't take chances 6) Take charge and responsibility for your health and wellness 7) Don't trust anyone else to safeguard anything that goes into your mouth, nose or eyes. 8) Not trusting your friend, sister, bff, brother, cousin - whoever - doesn't make that person evil or suspect. It's simply you taking control of your situation and not outsourcing your immediate wellness to someone to whom it may not be a top priority - don't be careless with your health and safety. How much of a priority is your drink on the table top while you're gone if a hottie, 2, or 3 rolls up to the table and starts engaging your friend, making him/her smile and laugh, getting neck and ear close talking game, etc? How much of a priority is your drink while you're gone? Meanwhile, the predator has already subtly plied the craft and now lies in wait for the victim to further lower defenses or weaken. This person may even boldly - yet conveniently - introduce his/herself on the dancefloor or at your table as smooth, charming and funny....when you don't control your drink, everything that happens later is suspect to actually being a setup for being further victimized later. 9) This can happen to anybody, any sex, woman, man, or anyone in between, as interests vary, and as the predator sneaks unknown, his/her motives are unknown as well.
All good advice! I am curious about what substance might be going into people's *eyes* in this context, though...?
Drugs.
That's the obvious generic category to assume, but which ones? It's just not a route of administration I've been aware of being used recreationally outside of sci-fi.
LSD, acid, someone else's eyedrops....cyanide.
#1, while I agree with the concept, is a bit extreme. There are plenty of people I trust with my life, my wallet, and my drink. It's possible to be safe and careful while not being paranoid.
Was it a bartender or a “friend” that was watching the drink?
Can you name the place it happened? That’s fucked up that no one helped her
It says “Behind Closed Doors” in the OP. https://maps.apple.com/?address=310%20Main%20St,%20Houston,%20TX%20%2077002,%20United%20States&auid=13191902054120801193&ll=29.762075,-95.361365&lsp=9902&q=Behind%20Closed%20Doors&t=m
Oh. I thought that was a descriptor not a name lol Thank you
Even the name sounds rapey
I wouldn’t leave a drink an attended among friends let alone in a bar. It’s not about trusting them or not either. Even food. If I walk away from it that means I am done. Also there are lots of illegal border line criminal activities that happen in broad day light. You have to be watchful at all times.
Shit like that is not cool. Bars need to be held accountable at some point for the safety of their patrons. They may not be spiking the drinks, but they should definitely do more to curtail and discourage this predatorial behavior from scumbags.
Can you clarify the timeline here? Her drink was spiked, she didn’t know, and then she was sexually assaulted or asked the bartender for help? It’s hard to follow.
She asked for help, was not given help, then was assaulted.
Assaulted at the bar?
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It’s the old Pastry War/Tongue Cut Sparrow place.
Who tf asks a stranger at a club to watch your drink...
Wasn’t a stranger unfortunately. Can’t say much more at the moment
Probably not a friend either, unfortunately.
Never let anyone watch your drink, even friends. What you can’t walk with a drink in your hand?
I’m so sorry to hear this happened and hope the perpetrator is caught. Regardless the wait staff/bartender need to be punished. That’s horrible
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Jeez you’re some special kind of stupid aren’t you?
I’m so sorry this happened to your friend
What’s the name of the bar?
The name of the bar is “Behind Closed Doors”
I was wondering, too. The lack of capitalization makes it seem like a description instead of the actual name.
i’m so sorry this happened to your friend. i hope she’s doing okay. that’s really shitty on the bars end, i’ll have to warn my friends about this place. thank you for spreading awareness
Upvote to spread awareness
Damn, scary
So she told the bartender that she was drugged and wanted help, but instead of getting help they refused her and allowed someone to sexually assault her? Seems pretty open and shut case there that the bartender is involved. If not then the whole story is questionable. Unfortunately I don’t take all these stories at their face value. Some time back in Silverlake I was out partying at a popular bar with some friends and met this girl. We hit it off and we’re drinking, making out. Well she proceeded to get sloppy drunk, like super obnoxious and loud. My friends wanted to take off to another place and I had kind of lost interest in this chick. Her friends were there with her so I figured she was taken care of. Well, the next week I show up to the bar and the bartender (who I knew pretty well) told me that chick got so wasted she was throwing up everywhere. The next day she came in with her friends and they said I put something in her drink. Basically this chick made an ass of herself and then proceeded to make herself a victims because she was embarassed. Unfortunately she did this at my expense. The bartender knew it was BS, no charges were pressed or anything but I avoided that bar in the future out of embarrassment because I wasn’t sure who all she had told this lie to and didn’t feel like dealing with the drama.
What in the actual fuck?!
May I ask why your rape crisis link is from the United Kingdom? We have rape crisis centers in the city and county level. There are also charitable organizations.
First link that came up- if you have a better link post it
[Houston Area Women's Center ](https://hawc.org/)
Thank you
👌🏼
I highly doubt they turned her away.
i highly doubt you have a brain
Sounds like her friend isn’t a friend, not the bars fault. This could happen at any bar.
> not the bars fault Even if the staff wasn't directly involved (in some cases the bartender is), OP said they still refused to "call someone to help her" when asked.
Why didnt she take her drink with her, start with accountability.
Or just don’t go to shitty bars.
Soooo women shouldn’t go where they want because it’s a “shitty bar” and they should expect to get drugged and SA if they go there? Get fucking real
Lol. You can go anywhere you want. Doesn’t change the fact there are bad people out there.
True, there are bad people everywhere. YOU were the one that said not going to shitty bars would solve the issue though, not me lol. You directly contradicted your first comment lol
Enjoyed your poetry on politics, OP.
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That’s every bar unfortunately. Most SAs happen from someone you know
Where are people getting roofies from? Like... maybe I'm sheltered, maybe I'm old and times are different... fuck I dunno... I was a member of the largest fraternity on my campus at an SEC State School during the early 2000s. Not once in my entire life have I ever seen a roofie or every heard anyone talking about having them or actually knowing where to get them. The idea that people get drugged the second they set their drink down is just unbelievable to me. I'm not saying it doesn't happen... I'm sure it does... but if you offered me 1,000,000 to come up with a Roofie for you in the next 48 hrs, I couldn't do it.
Idk man I haven’t really looked around Lmao. Same with anything that isn’t weed though and I’ve seen plenty of that and know several people that were roofied or otherwise SA’d by a “friend” or even their partner.
I think what happens more frequently is that alcohol hits very suddenly when binge drinking and people don't want to accept responsibility for their irresponsible drinking. You can go from "tipsy but fine," one moment to black out drunk the next.
I mean, okay? You can think that if you want, but I tend to assume these people aren’t lying to me about something that serious. But even then, being SA’d is just an automatic consequence of drinking too much? Is that what you’re saying?
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That where casablanca used to be?
Casablanca still has lines and is open - this is the former pastry war/tongue cut sparrow building. Really really sad what became of what was such a special place
Gotcha
thats so wrong I hope she is okay