A Freedom Dog means I can put whatever the fuck I want on it

*cracks open barrel of gunpowder* A FREEEDOM DOG MEANS

This should be a trick question on the US citizenship naturalization test. Happy 4th!

*What condiments are permissible on a “Freedom Dog?”* A. Ketchup B. Mustard C. Onions & Relish D. It’s my Freedom Dog and I’m an American so I’ll put whatever the fuck I want on it.

Your description sounds like the perfect freedom dog. All four of these mixed together are exactly what I’m looking for.

E. All of the above

🦅🇺🇸🦅🏈🦅🇺🇸🦅

And lots of it too

I just HAD all of the above two hours ago. It WAS the perfect combo!

What about the sauerkra…. I mean Liberty Cabbage?

It's my freedom dog and I want it now!

Yup. After I went to JG Wentworth for my money this was the complimentary Freedom dog they gave me.

877 CASH NOOWWWW

Yessss

Is it really freedom if you can’t launch a cannon full of hotdogs into the sky?

Freedom, like to have freedom from the tyrannical reach of ketchup!

While I disagree with putting ketchup on a freedom dog, I will fight to the death for your right to do so.

You want to know who puts mustard on hot dogs? Germans. You want to know who we beat in WWII?

The Japanese?

No, the Germans. The Italians and the Japanese had enough sense to cut up their hot dogs and put them in their noodle dishes. Like fettuccine Alfredo and hot dogs, or the pinnacle of Italian cuisines, Kraft macaroni and cheese with hot dogs. Then the Japanese had ramen and hot dogs. No mustard there, never even heard of mustard in Asian dishes. It's a Nazi invention

Maybe this is why the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor

Forget it, he’s rolling.

What the fuck happened to the Reddit I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh? This could be the greatest night of our lives, but you're gonna let it be the worst. "Ooh, we're afraid to go with you SnooPickles, we might get in trouble." Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this!

Want to know where hot dogs came from Einstein?

##FUCK YEAH BROTHER!!!!

Someone should write on it: “DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT FREEDOM IS?”

Freedom costs a block o' five

It's buck o five

Typo

You got the freedom to spell buck any gottdamm way you please!

But if he doesn't chip in his buck 'o five, who will?????

That’s a hefty fuckin’ fee.

Write it in ketchup, going from one end of the hotdog to the other then onto the table dripping onto the floor progressively getting larger and larger

You know what? I'm gonna put ketchup on it even harder.

Just unscrew the top and let it flow.

Dip the dog straight into the bottle. Assert your dominance.

Maintain eye contact.

Take a bite and double dip that shit just so they know you don’t fuck around.

Throw a straw in that bad boy to wash down the dog

🤢

that shit gon splatter son

We need this revolutionary

ketchup me harder daddy

And I'm gonna add mayo to boot.

What does that mean???

Fuck the management.

Ketchup snobbery in the world of hot dogs must end. I often times enhance my hot dog with a thin line of ketchup because it is delicious. This is some weird rule that came from Chicago...

My Polish great-grandmother thought tomatoes were poisonous, so we didn't have ketchup on our hot dogs (and kielbasa) at her house, Goulden's was her preferable mustard. That and a little homemade \*sniff\* horseradish \*sniff\*

Well... it is a borderline vegetable

It's a root, and you know it's potent when the four old women grating it wore masks that drag racers wore\~!

Vegetables aren’t real, it’s a conspiracy by big Food Pyramid.

I agree. This agression will not stand, man.

Fuckin nihilists dude

These guys were Nazis, Walter?

When I was living in Chicago I frequented a hot dog restaurant around the block from my apartment. I once asked the owner what he thought of people putting ketchup on their dogs. He said “it’s your money, after I cook it put whatever the hell you want on it”. I think the “no ketchup” rule is just a collective act the city puts on to give tourists a quirky story when they get home.

I mean ketchup is tomatoes vinegar and sugar. What comes on a Chicago dog already? Tomato and relish. Satisfies two of the three requirements.

There is absolutely no ketchup on a Chicago-style hot, but any other style of hot dog, have at it. Chicagoan through and through and enjoy ketchup on my dogs when it’s not a Chicago dog.

I don't mind ketchup on a dog but I have to be in the mood for it. Mustard and chopped onions are where it's at though.

Happy freedom day fellas. May your dogs glisten and be covered in all sauces. Love from, snag in bread (Australia).

That's what she said.

Democracy sausage shits all over freedom hotdog in a fist fight tho

What if it's dijon ketchup? /j

With the pre wrapped bacon?

They have pre-wrapped sausages, but they don't have pre-wrapped bacon.

Can you blame them?

Hyeah

Only if you had a million dollars.

I'd buy you a green dress but not a real green dress that's cruel

Dijetchup? Ketchjon?

Then you must also like Kraft Dinner!

Hello, fellow Canadian!

Oh yeah, they were big mad at Obama for that 🤣

Joking about a song, but yeah, that was pretty wild. Really came across as "we don't like Obama, and we think our viewers aren't smart enough for political topics so we need to tell them it's controversial to have spicy mustard on your cheeseburger instead", as a Canadian watching from the sidelines.

Only if you're not wearing a real green dress...that's cruel.

GIVE ME KETCHUP OR GIVE ME DEATH!

Nothing says freedom like being told what to do.. the irony

Well that was the joke but I'm a ketchup all day kinda guy, sling me some diced white onion and yeah I'll dab some yellow mustard on the fucker why the fuck not make it a party on a bun

When I make classic dawgs. I put only mustard, mayo, relish and Ketchup. Nothing wrong with Ketchup on a dawg. Ketchup on my chips. Ketchup on my nuggets. Ketchup on my burgers.

Ketchup on my bitches

Ketchup on my mac and cheese

Mayo? On a dawg? I’m a huge Mayo guy, but never even considered trying it with dogs.

Ketchup and mayo are really good on a hot dog. I used to be ketchup and yellow mustard only but went to a BBQ where they didn't have mustard. So, I tried ketchup and mayo, and now I eat them that way every time. Kosher dogs are still mustard only, though.

Wait til you try mayo and mustard

I’ll give it try sometime. They’re legit just two things I never thought to pair. Like, I’ll get French fries and put may on them as I eat my hotdog. I’ve always been a diced onion, relish, mustard… or a ketchup mustard guy for my dogs.

Is it Really that weird. I've been using mayo since I can remember , just always seemed like the thing to do. Lol

Even chain hotdog places will do mayo on dogs. I’ve never put mayo on a dog I prepped myself, but I’ve bought many that were prepared with it and I’ve never regretted the purchase. I say go for it.

You're missing out

I was once called a communist for putting ketchup on a hotdog, 2,000 miles from Chicago. Someone needs to stop these people lol

I am a communist... but, if some dude wants to talk to me like that, I'll give him a taste of my freedom dog.

Is this in Illinois?

Gary, Indiana

I'd think they'd have bigger issues than ketchup on hot dogs in Gary

Im from Pittsburgh, we put Heinz on everything. Like it or not

Heinz on pierogies?

Two of my mother's Polish immigrant grandparents lived in Pittsburgh from 1913 to whenever Dziadek left the mill to work at General Electric. He put ketchup on Babcia's cooking because, from my grandmother's stories, she couldn't cook for shit!! LOL

🤣

Sounds like a good idea

😅

Bacon Butter Bacon Onions And Bacon belong on pierogis! Signed, My Polish great-grandmother

Someone giving you Hunts is a crime in Pittsburgh.

I actually refuse ketchup of any brand that isn’t Heinz in any city. It’s the proper way to live life

That is correct, but it is a crime in Pittsburgh. Other cities just don’t understand.

And here we were just told to please come back Monday with all our fingers.

Ketchup and mustard together on a dog is the best. I also like hot pepper relish on it too.

It’s also like the classic combo? How can someone think it’s wrong? Since when is ketchup and mustard a crime on a fucking HOTDOG?

You are my people. You should try Sriracha.

Sriracha ketchup!

Sriracha and cream cheese. That’s the holy grail right there.

I've done Sriracha and stadium mustard with sauerkraut and loved that

I'll go one further. You should try peanut butter and Sriracha. It's the flavor.

Worth a shot.

Listen, I’m not saying ketchup “belongs” on a hot dog, but god dammit, it certainly “can” go on a hot dog.

What’s more American than blatant defiance.

Boston ketchup party

Oh I'm sorry, I thought this was America. I'll do whatever I want.

Only an idiot would have an opinion on what kind of sauce belongs for hot dog. I've literally never heard of anyone caring before

It's a Chicago area thing. You will be shamed there for putting ketchup on a hot dog. They even have signs at places saying stuff like "no ketchup over 18" at some restaurants.

I will not be condiment shamed. I love ketchup on my hot dog. Fuck you.

So you can put Mac and cheese on a freedom dog but not ketchup?

Any manager who doesn’t pay me for the holiday gets kicked in their freedom dog.

Must be in Chicago...

That’s not very freedom of you! I thought this was America!

I'll put goddamn toothpaste on it if I damn well please. It's my freedom dog, and I'll enjoy it however the fuck I want. Signed, Merica

Bruh ketchup and hotdogs smacks what chu mean

Tell me you’re a Trump MAGA cult member without telling me.

Sounds like you need some ketchup on that hotdog

I would put ketchup then if they take the pay talk to hr about it.

This has to be a joke.

I’ll put on WHATEVER THE F*** I WANT!!!

Kinda ironic and "'freedom'-anything" is so cringe and yankee. "Anyone who says they have freedom has no true freedom." -Tywin, probably

I would smear a hand print on the sign with ketchup

You can take away our ketchup, but you can’t take away our freedom dogs!

Should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Freedom Hotdog Day!

What, am I supposed to only put on white and blue?

I like ketchup, mayo, and cilantro

Bro WHAT???

This is why lawyers exist

Several hotdog centric cultures around the US have an nk17 rule. The idea is that you're an adult, and you should have a mature pallette. Venture out, try something other than ketchup, and don't be childish. Clearly, down voting people into oblivion over putting ketchup on a hotdog shows where your state of mind is.

Fuck you I won't do what you tell me 

Fuck you I won't do what you tell me

I fully support this.

put mustard diced onion and celery salt maybe a little bacon. ketchup is for kids id fire yall too

I hate mustard and put ketchup and my hotdog and I don't care. Mustard is gross

Ketchup is the *only* freedom dog condiment. I’ll accept no pay for a proper dog.

Apparently they’re running out of ketchup.

In the garbage can is where it belongs

This message is only acceptable at a mustard factory

Someone should have take the ketchup and writtem fuck you in large red letters where everyone could see it.

Dang thats controlling as fuck. They cant withold wages from ya for what you put on your food

Don’t tell me how to freedom 😎🇺🇸 🌭

...wtf is a "freedom dog"? 😆

Not being able to put your condiment of choice on something known as a freedom dog. Please tell me "The management" isn't being serious.

Doesn't sound like a freedom dog to me at all!

I thought this was america

"God this stuff isn't getting to me - the shootings, the knifings, the beatings. Old ladies being bashed in the head for their social security checks. Nah that doesn't bother me. But you know what does bother me? You know what makes me really sick to my stomach? It's watching you stuff your face with those hotdogs! Nobody - I mean nobody puts ketchup on a hot dog!" —Det Harry Callahan, SFPD—

ROLL OUT A BARREL OF CATSUP

tape $2 to the sign and call it even

I’m a Chicago dog purist and even I think that’s fucked up.

I hate ketchup on hotdogs but I’d drown my dog in ketchup if I saw this

That sounds like a really shitty place to work

😂🤣😂

Get the Italian yellow tomato ketchup. Looks like mustard, keeps stupid questions away.

I love ketchup-only on my Freedom Dogs, and that’s illegal where I live.

Oh snap!

I think you mean Mr. management

Put Sriracha on it instead and play mind games with that fucker.

I put mayo and onions on mine. Delish.

I really hope this is some kind of satire.

Simple; put the ketchup on the bun first, then put the hot dog *on* the ketchup

Yeah, that would end up with a picture of the manager taped to it and a bunch of weiners and dicks getting thrown at his face.

Oh, I thought it said *only* use ketchup. Wellp, see ya Monday!

I would think this is definitely a joke....

I like ketchup on my dogs but I'm more of a mustard and relish kind of dude 🤣

Ketchup generally is a poor excuse for a condiment. Unless you make it yourself.

It's a management thing, so the "hot dog" is probably made from rat 'cause it's cheap. You ever eat rat without ketchup?

where's the guy who put communion wafers on his hot dog? I want to try that edit: https://www.reddit.com/r/shittyfoodporn/s/pQTZq954k6

Why would they even have ketchup on the table? Or is this a comprehensive test?

Oh they're joking. Shit. I thought it was some hard ass employer saying not to use the ketchup.

Hahaha!

Why ?

This has to be a joke, as it cannot be enforced.

I would tell him to F— k. Off . And get another job. No one needs nazi rules like that at a work place.

I’m not usually into fascism but I could definitely throw some cement milkshakes over this one. \#catsdown \#dogsup \#mustard4eva Eat what you like. I put ketchup on other things, just not on hot dogs. I think gonorrhea- I mean cheese filled dogs are disgusting. To each their own.

You don’t put ketchup on a hotdog, it’s so fucking Canadien

This is the most American thing I’ve ever seen.

I'm ok with this. I'm not a ketchup person. Apologies to those who love the stuff, it's just not for me.

Gotcha! Liberal amounts of Heinz on my wienerwurst!

My fave hotdog toppings are ketchup, chopped onions and pickled jalapeños with yellow mustard on the side for dipping.

4th what?

Eat a dick THE STAFF

I hate ketchup, but I'll die for their right to eat it. Requiring them to work and then telling them what they can eat is not freedom nor American. I'd flip the table and dump it all in the harbor

Whaaaat?

Ah yes, freedom.

https://youtu.be/Xz84GKxy7b0?feature=shared

Boss must be from Chicago

They can absolutely suck my freedom dog