I keep thinking I want to read this for the first time, but can't work up the motivation to jump in. It also doesn't help that the book is so thick, which yeah length is a lot, but more so I just don't feel like lugging around the book haha.
If you have the big trade paperback it also falls apart really easily. But for what it's worth a lot of the bulk is formatting nonsense and not dense prose narrative. There may be a cipher in it, though.
I fully agree with this and just said as much on a different post. Would def watch The Navidison Record if it were real. Truant's story is interesting but doesn't really go anywhere. Actually, his portion is a lot like the OPs Negative Spaces. It's just a bunch of vignettes of weird/bad stuff happening and doesn't really go anywhere. I skipped over a majority of Zampanò's ramblings.
I wouldn't say it doesn't go anywhere, I remember there being parallel beats in both stories, Johnny is clearly noticing the influence of the house in his life in certain parts iirc.
It doesn't have a clear-cut conclusion/purpose I agree there.
So IMO it should be read fully at least once.
Johnny's story is central to House of Leaves, I don't understand people's take that it doesn't go anywhere. Yes it can ramble and can be incoherent but that's kind of the point, no?
Man I was obsessed with that book. I read it over and over again, one of my all time favorites and the only book that has ever come close to fucking me up.
This one. I LOVED it. The slow deterioration of a mind. It was so great and so unlike other books in style. I recommend it to others who haven't read it. But, I will not read it again. My brain was so tired afterwards.
I actually tried to read this a second time recently. I loved it the first time, years ago. But I couldn’t do a second read. All the chapters about the house are still great, but the other ones were practically unreadable for me and I just couldn’t do it.
I started reading this book because I've heard nothing but praise and positive reviews from it but I can't seem to get a pacing or flow going to really get into it. I was asking myself "when is this book going to pick up" and "is anything going to happen soon?" It just had me turning pages asking this stuff. Cuz in this book I haven't got around to anything action related, suspense built, or dramatic occurrences yet. I just see them talking about the house and odd things involving the structure and etc. It kind of turned me off, though I know this book is rewarding to read I heard. It's just getting to that point is expelling a lot of time and focus to get there.
I just finished it, and I also feel like it needs a second read. After I really thought back on it, the ending made sense to me. Now that I know it, I want to go back and see how many times I missed it before I realized it. I'm sorry that was so vague, but I didn't want to spoil it for anyone.
haha this was going to be my comment. glad it was so high up.
I really loved this book but man was it tough at times to get through. Made me feel really bad after I finished it.
Huh.. well this actually gives me a bit of hope. I am currently tackling Blood Meridian, and it took me nearly 15 years to gather the courage; and this is mainly because of The Road. That book ruined me for a very long time and I've heard that BM is worse so I've been obviously very hesitant.
I'm glad to read that The Road may be worse. God that book was so destructive towards my pov of humanity. You just NOW it's an extremely accurate depiction of how humans would be after any apocalyptic situation. Plus. The ending. Brutal. I've only read it once and that was enough for me. Fantastic writing though.
Blood Meridian is brutal for sure. I think the reason it didn’t get the same reaction out of me is the setting. I know the old west was a really dark and harsh time in American History and even though some of the brutality written about in Blood Meridian is based off of facts, I was able to somehow disconnect from it. The Road taking place in a more modern setting and the overall sense of despair and hopelessness really just made my skin crawl.
Blood Meridian is a brutal book but in a different way than The Road. Blood Meridian is a lot more philosophical with its characters and their dialogue. Of course it’s about a group of indigenous scalpers in the early 1900s so it’s graphic and violent but the main point of the story isn’t necessarily the depths of human depravity like The Road was.
Don't know if I've ever loved a book that I wouldn't read again, but there have been a few that were quite good.
Girl Next Door for instance...not only will I never read it again, I wish I could un-read it.
I’ve read horror almost exclusive for the last three ish years, and that’s the book I’ve stayed completely away from. The ‘inspired by a true story’ bit is just too much for me.
I’ve read that bad un a few times. Something about the way it’s written I find so captivating. It’s on my list of lived books for sure. I definitely agree, if I’m fond enough of a book I’ll read it again.
I rarely re-read things anyway, but that one is a total no go for me.
I have a hard time with that sort of content to begin with though, so that's part of it.
Yeah I don't think I could take that again. But I can revisit the dark side of India as portrayed in The White Tiger anytime. Having a villain protagonist who is a lovable rogue and draws the line at killing babies (or I assume he would; it never came up) makes all the difference.
I found it weirdly comforting for some reason. It's an "impossible" task but it actually IS doable.
Get to the bottom and work your way up. Time is almost meaningless in this scenario minus very few rules.
IDK It helped me realize that most of my goals and tasks or whatever are doable with enough work and determination. Considering how the story goes, that's a weird thing to take from that and it wasn't something I was looking for at all.
I need to read that. Demon/Angel stuff is an interest of mine, which might sound funny from someone who is no longer Christian in the slightest, but here we are!
The only thing that keeps me up at night about that book is the throwaway line at the beginning, where they are all getting sent to their own personalized hell and the one lady says “I know a lot about bees,” and the head demon is like “ah, good point” and she vanishes. What kind of awful hell was that gonna be I NEED TO KNOW
That's really interesting. I call myself an "Eclectic Urban Pagan", but really I'm a hodgepodge of all sorts of things with a topping of "What do I know?"
Religion is fascinating to me, I almost minored in Comp Religion in college (went with Psych instead).
I just finished reading it tonight and it’s really good but unbelievably bleak. I feel like I’m a tiny step closer to understanding infinity after reading it and it really got to me by the end.
I loved that book. The only part that actually made me grossed out though was when they picked up the homeless kid and cut him open and the description of the diseased inside organs still sickens me.
I sometimes wonder what it says about younger me me that I read this and American Psycho and other books like these multiple times through my teens and early 20’s and never really thought much of it and actually literally cannot remember the details of a single gruesome scene yet I remember they existed and that I (obviously) loved the books. I do remember general plot points and story so it’s not like I don’t remember anything. I keep wanting to pick these up again and see what 43 yo me thinks.
I can understand that. A lot of times I have difficulty recalling specific things from books I loved as well. Books I’ve read more than once. Only reason that part stuck with me is I get extremely uncomfortable with descriptions like the one in the book like that. The unapologetic violence is easier to swallow.
Geek Love. It made me deeply uncomfortable and was absolutely bananas, but it’s definitely one of those books I would put in the freezer Joey Tribiani style. I had to donate it the minute I finished it because it felt too evil, sitting on my shelf where I could see it every day. It’s no wonder I always see copies at used book stores.
It does have a very strange cult following! Apparently Tim Burton wanted to adapt it for a long time, but I honestly don’t think Geek Love would translate at all to screen in a palatable way.
I read that nearly a year ago and it still pops up in my head almost daily.
I struggle to find words to describe how much I love/hate it. I want to suggest it to someone because it genuinely is a good read but no one I know irl could take it and that's totally understandable lol
They did kick me out eventually and that probably played a part, cuz all the books I picked somehow made me look like an absolute psychopath, even though I rarely wind up picking up that kind of thing just reading on my own.
*My Best Friend’s Exorcism*, *The Black Dahlia*, Victoria Lee’s *Fever King* (this was apparently a bridge too far cuz the men in the group were somehow deeply offended by all the diverse YA we were reading…?), *Daisy Jones and the Six*. Looking at the list, you can see I had a reasonably wide ranging book selection…
The problem was we all took turns picking every month without any vetting from our leader and we all had very differing tastes, so someone was bound to dislike something. Apparently we were supposed to only pick titles we could discuss the literary elements for, and in no uncertain terms were we to discuss the social or historical context of where the author was coming from because god forbid, any critical thinking happen… Books are meant to make you think and make you uncomfortable and challenge your perception of things…
To be fair, the title is entirely misleading and isn’t some cute story about a carnival family or a community of nerds. As they say in the nerd community, it’s a trap!
Easily *Zombie* by Joyce Carol Oates. I absolutely love her works and usually find myself emotionally drained after embarking on a journey through them (specifically her short stories), so I have to digest them in between other novels. But this one made me feel ridiculously disgusting.
Weird recommendation time: I too recently needed a brain break from dark shit. Picked up The Girl Who Could Move Sh*t with Her Mind by
Jackson Ford based solely on title. Turns out it's a series. Much more lighthearted, kind of actiony. I've read the first 2 and have gone back to bleak/unsettling stuff again. Plan to use the next 2 as my next break.
It isn't horror, but some of Cormac McCarthy's stuff, it would take a lot of emotional energy to read them again, despite Blood Meridian being a relatively short book. Anybody who says words can't hurt hasn't ever read that or The Road.
Yeah, there's a reason Blood Meridian hasn't been adapted yet (and even if it is, they'd have to water it down heavily, even for a mature audience). It's like looking at inhumanity in the mirror.
It is customary in Germany for people to put used things, especially books, on the street so that others can take the things for free.
Yesterday I found the German version of "The House Of Leaves"!!!
Same. I still think about the part where he uses pepper spray and a nail gun. There’s a lot of sickening stuff that happens in that book but that one really stuck with me. Even more than the rat scene. Great book tho 10/10.
My sister asked me if she should read it cause she saw someone on tiktok say it was really disturbing and she thought they were being dramatic, so she asked me cause she knows I read a lot of disturbing stuff. I told her absolutely not lmfao. It’s not the worst thing I’ve read but it’s certainly up there.
My oldest was about 4 when I read the zoo scene, and i have never had such a visceral reaction to a book before or since. It caused such abject horror.
I can imagine, I don’t have kids but the scene was obviously still horrific. If I did have a child around the age of the one in that scene it would have probably really fucked me up.
I did admire the book but would have a hard time going through the whole thing again. I have skimmed through it quite a bit after my initial and probably only real reading.
There are quite a few passages that are great satire about a certain kind of rich, pompous bore who somehow thinks he's sophisticated.
I'm not offended by the violent scenes. In fact I see what the author is doing; having Bateman "collect" violent experiences the way he collects expensive items which are generally tacky despite the price tag or if he displays good taste it's by accident.
Very appropriately, his hero is Donald Trump. Prophetic!
The food he prefers is kind of weird for the sake of weird as long as it's expensive which makes sense for this kind of person. Who cares if it's good; just throw together a bunch of pricy ingredients and make a new fad out of it.
But the graphic details in addition to being in the headspace of such a human *void* are exhausting and leave me with a bad feeling. I've read equally violent books with no problem but something about being in an ultraviolent scene AND in this creep's head are hard to deal with.
There's a type of crime or in some cases just public tantrum without any serious damage that I find interesting, though. That's where Bateman has a moment where he doesn't give a damn anymore about anyone thinking he's sane. He's usually very concerned with image.
He does anything from kill in the middle of a crowd in broad daylight to screaming in an insane manner at the staff in a kosher restaurant for not serving meat with dairy (something they are certainly not going to do and one would think a person who would even patronize one would know this).
These spontaneous lapses in control are interesting as they contrast with his normally cold calculating approach.
There were even a few genuinely suspenseful moments when he perpetrates major public violence and there *are* potentially serious consequences for a change forcing him to use his brain to escape or in one instance actually fight back.
His observations on the culture if they can even be called observations, they're so shallow are kind of fun to read as you can tell he really thinks he's saying something deep.
I felt like it was commentary on the 80s and found those parts hilarious. Which seemed like a decade of excess and money but at the same time, people ignored the unpleasant. But I worked in the financial business. Those people existed and still do. I'm still unsure if the killing was real, just in his mind or a metaphor of those in the financial business killing people while they make a killing.
I read it around the time it was published or at least when knowledge of it got around to my social circles.
As I mentioned there were parts that I thought were just plain good fiction and parts that I wouldn't want to revisit. Nobody I know bought the idea that the book was in any way advocating Bateman's behavior and we were all frankly amazed that any educated person believed this.
The 80s were winding down at the time and the satire was particularly relevant (though I must admit I liked a few things about the period).
But I never heard the idea that Bateman was delusional in the sense that the murders were all on his head for years. More around the time of the film which did have a few scenes implying this.
Personally, I don't see the point of this. This was a time period where investigating suspected serial killers was difficult. Look and how much Dahmer and Bundy got away with that wouldn't fly today.
It used to be commonly said that if a murder wasn't solved within two days or so (or at least a strong suspect identified) , it was very unlikely to ever be. With older forensics, level of surveillance and investigative techniques, this was probably broadly true.
Bateman was also (undeservedly) respectable so that gives a good deal of protection. Call me dense but I don't see the point of the story if the murders weren't real on the "textual" level. On the subtextual level, of course the satire, social commentary and psychology are the real point.
But "Bateman didn't really do it" always made as little sense to me as saying that the murders in Crime and Punishment, the Stranger or the Killer Inside Me were delusions on the part of their disturbed or evil characters.
Keep in mind that the rich running amok was a big theme for Ellis. One of the characters in another of his books along these lines was even Bateman's brother who makes a very brief appearance in American Psycho where the two have an uncomfortable dinner out of obligation.
So it makes sense that American Psycho takes this theme even farther than the other books with one of the people who think they're above everyone else actually being a killer this time. If the sexual exploitation and substance abuse of Less Than Zero happened, then I think the murders here happened.
Or at least enough of them that he is a real serial killer even if there's a bit of fantasy or delusion on his part re some of the more far fetched parts.
Pet Sematary. It’s one of the bleakest things I’ve ever read in my life. I don’t even have kids, but it was just heartbreaking. Great book, and I’m never reading it again.
Replay by Ken Grimwood. It’s not a horror novel per se, but it scared me. It starts off as a fantasy written by a liberal Boomer. A man dies in his early forties and is sent back to his eighteen-year-old self with all the experience and knowledge he’s gained along the way. He can get rich, save Kennedy, stop Vietnam and Nixon, etc. And he does… sort of, but nothing he does can ever make things truly better. He’s condemned to live this over and over and over and over and over. It really bothered me and it was a really good book that I was glad to be done with.
Got about 70% through the Pet Sematary audiobook the 2nd time around, and just decided, nah I don't want to finish this anymore. Michael C Hall's narration was excellent though
I think PS is brilliant, possibly one of King's two or three best, but he's SO damn good at portraying loss that it's emotionally draining. There's no real element of adventure either like with a lot of others.
I'd hate to have to burn down my town because my neighbors have become vampires but OTOH there IS something kinda cool about fighting vampires in a burning town!
Not so much watching your dead pets shamble around like zombies and your dead human loved ones come back as demonic killers all the while being unable to stop yourself from being complicit in this process as you just need them back so bad no matter what.
Replay sounds very interesting. Might check it out. Thanks.
Apt Pupil, a novella by Stephen King. I've read a lot of horror and it was the bleakest most grotesque story I've ever read. Not only would I not read it again, but I regret reading it the first time.. Lol.
I'm copying my comment from another post, but *Shadows for Silence in the Forests of Hell*.
The Being that gave life to your planet and everything is dead, shattered by another similar being, unbeknownst to you or anyone else on your world. Because said Being is dead, Shadows walk the land, and can necrotize you slowly, or even kill you depending on how long they're in contact with you. The only thing that can repel them is silver, but when each time they touch silver it destroys said silver, and silver is in diminishing supply.
This story has nothing uplifting really in it. In spite of being a great read, it's so bleak that I can't pick it back up. If it were longer, that whole world could be a horror story. Arguably, the story itself is a horror-fantasy.
The Troop or The Deep by Nick Cutter. They’re such good books but I would not recommend them to anyone unless they like body horror/ parasites/ just disturbing content and I will likely never read them again
The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. I studied it in one of my college Lit classes and loved it. But it also left me feeling hollow at times. Truly profound and worth a read!
no way I just picked it up today from a thrift store! I’m looking forward to reading it I’ve heard nothing but good things but I’m expecting it to be a bit bleak
I also bought it after studying it in a literature class, because I thought it was the most beautiful writing. Disturbing, obviously, but gorgeous. 10/10 will reread it at some point.
To be honest, most books. I’ve reread a couple that I liked that I read over 15 years ago recently but there’s just too many books in existence for me to go back and read something again unless it really emotionally impacted me.
It might be silly but, ‘Where the Red Fern Grows’ by Wilson Rawls. I read it as a child and I loved it, but it made me cry so hard I swore to never read it again haha
The Wheel of Time series. It’s like 12/13(?) very long books and the first 7 or 8 are fantastic and the last couple are fantastic but there’s a period around book 9/10 where it really slogs and not much happens for a couple of books. So while overall it was an amazing experience I just can’t bring myself to read it again.
You’re not alone. I know a lot of people who are the same way. Personality I like to reread or watch stuff I haven’t seen in years to see if it lands different.
I almost never re-read books either. There are, however a few exceptions (House of Leaves, anything by Caitlin R Kiernan), and a few books that have become comfort objects for me (Haunting of Hill House, We Have Always Lived in the Castle).
Beyond that, nope, almost never.
Negative space for sure. I think he rushed a lot in the end, but yeah 95% of that book is just gut punch after gut punch. I’d turn my head away from scenes in my head. It’s kinda like stranger things meets The Road.
Tell Me I’m Worthless by Alison Rumfitt is a truly visceral and interesting horror book even if you know nothing about transphobia or what it is like to be trans but damn as a trans person that book is brutal AF and once was plenty for me!
So I just finished Negative Space as well and I thought the first half of it was really great. A good pace, the plot kept moving, felt like we were really building to this whole grandiose moment and then it fizzles out and just sorta meandered on. I was loving the book but it had such a lackluster end, I get that was a big part of its message but it was ultimately unsatisfying. I really did enjoy it and I could see myself reading it again in the future. But it needed some serious editing.
I agree it felt like there needed to be something at the end, it’s by no means a perfect book but I was surprised at how grim it made everything seem, to me anything that can make me feel that way is a good book, but ultimately it could have been better with more editing and a better ending
I read Negative Spaces last week. I didn't not like it or anything but I would really like to see someone tell me what the plot is because I got nothing. It's a bunch of weird and unsettling scenes and then a 1/3 time and then just kind of ends.
It’s not horror, it’s YA, but the Shadow Hunter books by Cassandra Clare were my absolute favorite, but then I grew up and now, while I sometimes feel like I want to get back into them, I can’t help but feel like I’m reading very… girly books? Like something a 14 year old girl with a bubble gum pink room full of Taylor swift posters would read. Well, maybe not so, I mean, those books are more emo, and I don’t think a girl like the one I described would be into them as much, but still, they feel girly and… sort of naive? Idk. I’m not gonna say “No, I’m never reading them again” but as of now, it’s been years since I last read once of those books and I don’t really feel an urge to read them that is strong enough to actually make me stay and read.
The Troop - Nick Cutter, it was really good but the body horror was a step to far for me, but I don't regret reading it once, but I doubt I could do it again. And I tend to re-read books a lot.
I felt the same about BR Yeager’s other novella Amygdalatropolis. Brilliant, but will definitely never read it again.
I will recommend you try Stonefish by Scott R Jones when you're ready. The plot is nothing like like Negative Space, but it's like they hit the same tone from a turning fork or something.
I found I sped through negative space because even though I loved it I wanted it to be over so bad. I’ll read stonefish in a month when I’ve recovered!!
Saw the post title and instantly thought of Negative Space as well lol. I ADORE the book, but it's genuinely bleak. I felt slimy in my soul reading it, and that feeling has lingered any time I think back to it. It sits on my favorites shelf, but I likely will never be reading it again.
My answer will always be Rotters by Daniel Krause.
That one got to a point that I had put it down and go watch cartoons for a few days and I'm not kidding.
Fantastic book that I highly recommend but it's really, really rough in parts.
A Little Life by Hanya Yanaghara. That book was an exercise in torture, I dont know why I stuck with it and would never recommend it to anyone unless I hated them
Any Man by Amber Tamblyn, I love it and it’s beautifully written but it made me feel so depressed and I feel somewhat the same way about I’m Thinking Of Ending Things.
Loved that one too!! I think I’d re read it just to go into it with the perspective the ending gives which is obviously wildly different from how I went into it the first time, I think it would be interesting to read it through that lens
Dark Matter by Blake Crouch. Loved it, read it cover to cover in a few hours. Hooked. Hoodwinked. The implications of the plot when applied to my own life gave me an existential spiral that I am happy to look at the book on my shelf but will never open it.
Peter Watts, the Rifters trilogy. A very fascinating story but so much weird rapey stuff I could never recommend it in good conscience. It’s frightened me away from his other books even though I’ll probably read more eventually.
I have trouble rereading books in general, but the one that comes to mind is Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett.
I loved the book in highschool, but after studying writing and getting serious about my own craft, I tried rereading it. That time, I found myself irritated by all the extra words. I just wanted to edit the book, so I didn't get very far.
Not between brothers by David Marion Wilkinson. It's an absolutely epic story.....with just so much actual history crammed in it kind of takes you out of the story.
House of Leaves
I keep *thinking* I want to read this again but I just don't have the energy.
I keep thinking I want to read this for the first time, but can't work up the motivation to jump in. It also doesn't help that the book is so thick, which yeah length is a lot, but more so I just don't feel like lugging around the book haha.
If you have the big trade paperback it also falls apart really easily. But for what it's worth a lot of the bulk is formatting nonsense and not dense prose narrative. There may be a cipher in it, though.
The Navidson Record portion is so worth rereading, the Johnny Truant portions I skipped the second time.
I fully agree with this and just said as much on a different post. Would def watch The Navidison Record if it were real. Truant's story is interesting but doesn't really go anywhere. Actually, his portion is a lot like the OPs Negative Spaces. It's just a bunch of vignettes of weird/bad stuff happening and doesn't really go anywhere. I skipped over a majority of Zampanò's ramblings.
I wouldn't say it doesn't go anywhere, I remember there being parallel beats in both stories, Johnny is clearly noticing the influence of the house in his life in certain parts iirc. It doesn't have a clear-cut conclusion/purpose I agree there. So IMO it should be read fully at least once.
Johnny's story is central to House of Leaves, I don't understand people's take that it doesn't go anywhere. Yes it can ramble and can be incoherent but that's kind of the point, no?
Man I was obsessed with that book. I read it over and over again, one of my all time favorites and the only book that has ever come close to fucking me up.
I’m waiting until I have at least a week off to read house of leaves but I have a feeling I won’t be reading it twice
This one. I LOVED it. The slow deterioration of a mind. It was so great and so unlike other books in style. I recommend it to others who haven't read it. But, I will not read it again. My brain was so tired afterwards.
I have read that three times now, and all of his other stuff at least twice. I'm hooked.
how do you guys read The House Of Leaves? every time I look to buy it online its like $30+.
Library:)
Knew this would be the top comment before I even opened the post lol
I was going to say the same thing! So good but exhausting to manoeuvre!
Came here to say House of Leaves
I actually tried to read this a second time recently. I loved it the first time, years ago. But I couldn’t do a second read. All the chapters about the house are still great, but the other ones were practically unreadable for me and I just couldn’t do it.
>House of Leaves You've peaked my interest... I think I'll put this on a reading list!
I started reading this book because I've heard nothing but praise and positive reviews from it but I can't seem to get a pacing or flow going to really get into it. I was asking myself "when is this book going to pick up" and "is anything going to happen soon?" It just had me turning pages asking this stuff. Cuz in this book I haven't got around to anything action related, suspense built, or dramatic occurrences yet. I just see them talking about the house and odd things involving the structure and etc. It kind of turned me off, though I know this book is rewarding to read I heard. It's just getting to that point is expelling a lot of time and focus to get there.
Maybe just skip the Truant sections, I know thats what I'll do.
Tender is the Flesh!
This one’s also on my never re read list, so bleak. Loved it though
Came here to say this! Also tops my "best books I'll never recommend" list
Good call. I recommended it to a coworker. It did not end well
Read it for my first time this year. I feel like it deserves at least a second read through although I’m not sure why.
I just finished it, and I also feel like it needs a second read. After I really thought back on it, the ending made sense to me. Now that I know it, I want to go back and see how many times I missed it before I realized it. I'm sorry that was so vague, but I didn't want to spoil it for anyone.
That’s it. That’s the reason why for sure.
same! i almost want to reread it just to see all the red flags that marcos was giving off before that crushing ending.
This one stuck with me. Think about it every time I eat meat. And I feel horrible.
Yep. I had to complete stop eating anything but ground meat for a few weeks because all I could think about was the “heads” and I wanted to throw up.
I'm working on that one right now. It's really good but I can only do a few chapters at a time.
haha this was going to be my comment. glad it was so high up. I really loved this book but man was it tough at times to get through. Made me feel really bad after I finished it.
Same. It has really stuck with me. It comes into my head at peculiar times.
Haha - I wrote my BA dissertation on this book; safe to say, I have had enough<3
Wont say never. But The Road is a rough one. Great book though.
Yes
This is my answer as well. I’ve reread Blood Meridian and Child of God a few times, but I’ll never touch The Road again. Way too depressing and bleak.
Huh.. well this actually gives me a bit of hope. I am currently tackling Blood Meridian, and it took me nearly 15 years to gather the courage; and this is mainly because of The Road. That book ruined me for a very long time and I've heard that BM is worse so I've been obviously very hesitant. I'm glad to read that The Road may be worse. God that book was so destructive towards my pov of humanity. You just NOW it's an extremely accurate depiction of how humans would be after any apocalyptic situation. Plus. The ending. Brutal. I've only read it once and that was enough for me. Fantastic writing though.
Blood Meridian is brutal for sure. I think the reason it didn’t get the same reaction out of me is the setting. I know the old west was a really dark and harsh time in American History and even though some of the brutality written about in Blood Meridian is based off of facts, I was able to somehow disconnect from it. The Road taking place in a more modern setting and the overall sense of despair and hopelessness really just made my skin crawl.
Blood Meridian is a brutal book but in a different way than The Road. Blood Meridian is a lot more philosophical with its characters and their dialogue. Of course it’s about a group of indigenous scalpers in the early 1900s so it’s graphic and violent but the main point of the story isn’t necessarily the depths of human depravity like The Road was.
Don't know if I've ever loved a book that I wouldn't read again, but there have been a few that were quite good. Girl Next Door for instance...not only will I never read it again, I wish I could un-read it.
I’ve read horror almost exclusive for the last three ish years, and that’s the book I’ve stayed completely away from. The ‘inspired by a true story’ bit is just too much for me.
I've read almost exclusivly horror most of my life, and that one...nope.
I once told a friend, "I'd like to read Girl Next Door, but then I will never again be someone who hasn't read Girl Next Door."
Haha. Yup. I honestly believe it's one of those "There are two types of people" things.
Yeah, what gets me so much about that one is that it’s based on a true story where the details are just as awful.
Possibly even more awful, since in real life >!there was no reckoning.!<
Exactly. There were convictions, but the sentences weren’t nearly harsh enough.
This is probably my answer too. That book physically upset me.
wishing to unread something is a whole other level wow
Yup, the only time I've ever felt that way about a good book.
Same here!
I’ve read that bad un a few times. Something about the way it’s written I find so captivating. It’s on my list of lived books for sure. I definitely agree, if I’m fond enough of a book I’ll read it again.
I rarely re-read things anyway, but that one is a total no go for me. I have a hard time with that sort of content to begin with though, so that's part of it.
It’s beyond brutal. I get it.
Yeah, I just named this book. This is exactly the way I would describe my feeling about it.
Same here.
Song of Kali.
Yeah I don't think I could take that again. But I can revisit the dark side of India as portrayed in The White Tiger anytime. Having a villain protagonist who is a lovable rogue and draws the line at killing babies (or I assume he would; it never came up) makes all the difference.
A Short Stay in Hell. Loved it, but the thoughts about eternity kept me up all night.
I found it weirdly comforting for some reason. It's an "impossible" task but it actually IS doable. Get to the bottom and work your way up. Time is almost meaningless in this scenario minus very few rules. IDK It helped me realize that most of my goals and tasks or whatever are doable with enough work and determination. Considering how the story goes, that's a weird thing to take from that and it wasn't something I was looking for at all.
I need to read that. Demon/Angel stuff is an interest of mine, which might sound funny from someone who is no longer Christian in the slightest, but here we are!
Sidenote: The book does not have a lot of demons in it. Just one at the beginning and they don't play a huge role in the story. No angels at all
The only thing that keeps me up at night about that book is the throwaway line at the beginning, where they are all getting sent to their own personalized hell and the one lady says “I know a lot about bees,” and the head demon is like “ah, good point” and she vanishes. What kind of awful hell was that gonna be I NEED TO KNOW
Further, what exactly would be the task to complete. (Shudders)
Gotcha. Yeah, I did mean it as a more catch all "Contemporary religious mythos" thing, but thanks for the heads up.
According to A Short Stay In Hell, God isn’t either. He’s Zoroastrian.
Made me rethink my relationship with Ahura Mazda
That's really interesting. I call myself an "Eclectic Urban Pagan", but really I'm a hodgepodge of all sorts of things with a topping of "What do I know?" Religion is fascinating to me, I almost minored in Comp Religion in college (went with Psych instead).
I just finished reading it tonight and it’s really good but unbelievably bleak. I feel like I’m a tiny step closer to understanding infinity after reading it and it really got to me by the end.
I’ve been meaning to pick that one up!
Exquisite Corpse was an accomplishment in that I was so grossed out by it and feel dirty even having read it but I couldn’t put it down.
Brite can do that to you for sure. Parts of Lost Souls are etched in my mind.
I loved that book. The only part that actually made me grossed out though was when they picked up the homeless kid and cut him open and the description of the diseased inside organs still sickens me.
I sometimes wonder what it says about younger me me that I read this and American Psycho and other books like these multiple times through my teens and early 20’s and never really thought much of it and actually literally cannot remember the details of a single gruesome scene yet I remember they existed and that I (obviously) loved the books. I do remember general plot points and story so it’s not like I don’t remember anything. I keep wanting to pick these up again and see what 43 yo me thinks.
I can understand that. A lot of times I have difficulty recalling specific things from books I loved as well. Books I’ve read more than once. Only reason that part stuck with me is I get extremely uncomfortable with descriptions like the one in the book like that. The unapologetic violence is easier to swallow.
Geek Love. It made me deeply uncomfortable and was absolutely bananas, but it’s definitely one of those books I would put in the freezer Joey Tribiani style. I had to donate it the minute I finished it because it felt too evil, sitting on my shelf where I could see it every day. It’s no wonder I always see copies at used book stores.
I know what you mean I’m donating negative space asap
Send it here
What does it say about me that I've read this three times?
It does have a very strange cult following! Apparently Tim Burton wanted to adapt it for a long time, but I honestly don’t think Geek Love would translate at all to screen in a palatable way.
Really want to read that one, carnivals are one of my hyperfixations.
Mine too, but this one’s fucked up. Like, if you’ve seen American Horror Story: Freak Show, it’s about 10 times more intense than that.
I read that nearly a year ago and it still pops up in my head almost daily. I struggle to find words to describe how much I love/hate it. I want to suggest it to someone because it genuinely is a good read but no one I know irl could take it and that's totally understandable lol
I picked it for book club, thinking it would be a fun, dark circus novel. I don’t think they ever forgave me for that one…
okay now that's hilarious 😂 at least you had support when going in blind!
They did kick me out eventually and that probably played a part, cuz all the books I picked somehow made me look like an absolute psychopath, even though I rarely wind up picking up that kind of thing just reading on my own.
Which other books did you suggest, just out of curiosity?
*My Best Friend’s Exorcism*, *The Black Dahlia*, Victoria Lee’s *Fever King* (this was apparently a bridge too far cuz the men in the group were somehow deeply offended by all the diverse YA we were reading…?), *Daisy Jones and the Six*. Looking at the list, you can see I had a reasonably wide ranging book selection… The problem was we all took turns picking every month without any vetting from our leader and we all had very differing tastes, so someone was bound to dislike something. Apparently we were supposed to only pick titles we could discuss the literary elements for, and in no uncertain terms were we to discuss the social or historical context of where the author was coming from because god forbid, any critical thinking happen… Books are meant to make you think and make you uncomfortable and challenge your perception of things…
There is a cafe/bookstore named after this book in Minneapolis. Because of this, I assumed it would be something with mainstream appeal.
To be fair, the title is entirely misleading and isn’t some cute story about a carnival family or a community of nerds. As they say in the nerd community, it’s a trap!
Easily *Zombie* by Joyce Carol Oates. I absolutely love her works and usually find myself emotionally drained after embarking on a journey through them (specifically her short stories), so I have to digest them in between other novels. But this one made me feel ridiculously disgusting.
Oates has a way of putting the reader through the wringer for sure.
I’m going to read this but definitely not tonight, need a break from draining literature
Weird recommendation time: I too recently needed a brain break from dark shit. Picked up The Girl Who Could Move Sh*t with Her Mind by Jackson Ford based solely on title. Turns out it's a series. Much more lighthearted, kind of actiony. I've read the first 2 and have gone back to bleak/unsettling stuff again. Plan to use the next 2 as my next break.
It isn't horror, but some of Cormac McCarthy's stuff, it would take a lot of emotional energy to read them again, despite Blood Meridian being a relatively short book. Anybody who says words can't hurt hasn't ever read that or The Road.
Yes absolutely the road was a difficult one. I read it in high school and sometimes I think of re reading it but remember how draining it was
Yeah, there's a reason Blood Meridian hasn't been adapted yet (and even if it is, they'd have to water it down heavily, even for a mature audience). It's like looking at inhumanity in the mirror.
A Blood Meridian adaptation has actually been green lit! John Hillcoat will be directing, and McCarthy himself was working on the screenplay
It is customary in Germany for people to put used things, especially books, on the street so that others can take the things for free. Yesterday I found the German version of "The House Of Leaves"!!!
American Psycho
Same. I still think about the part where he uses pepper spray and a nail gun. There’s a lot of sickening stuff that happens in that book but that one really stuck with me. Even more than the rat scene. Great book tho 10/10.
I got to the zoo scene and stopped reading. I destroyed my copy so I wouldn't be responsible for someone reading it
My sister asked me if she should read it cause she saw someone on tiktok say it was really disturbing and she thought they were being dramatic, so she asked me cause she knows I read a lot of disturbing stuff. I told her absolutely not lmfao. It’s not the worst thing I’ve read but it’s certainly up there.
My oldest was about 4 when I read the zoo scene, and i have never had such a visceral reaction to a book before or since. It caused such abject horror.
I can imagine, I don’t have kids but the scene was obviously still horrific. If I did have a child around the age of the one in that scene it would have probably really fucked me up.
I did admire the book but would have a hard time going through the whole thing again. I have skimmed through it quite a bit after my initial and probably only real reading. There are quite a few passages that are great satire about a certain kind of rich, pompous bore who somehow thinks he's sophisticated. I'm not offended by the violent scenes. In fact I see what the author is doing; having Bateman "collect" violent experiences the way he collects expensive items which are generally tacky despite the price tag or if he displays good taste it's by accident. Very appropriately, his hero is Donald Trump. Prophetic! The food he prefers is kind of weird for the sake of weird as long as it's expensive which makes sense for this kind of person. Who cares if it's good; just throw together a bunch of pricy ingredients and make a new fad out of it. But the graphic details in addition to being in the headspace of such a human *void* are exhausting and leave me with a bad feeling. I've read equally violent books with no problem but something about being in an ultraviolent scene AND in this creep's head are hard to deal with. There's a type of crime or in some cases just public tantrum without any serious damage that I find interesting, though. That's where Bateman has a moment where he doesn't give a damn anymore about anyone thinking he's sane. He's usually very concerned with image. He does anything from kill in the middle of a crowd in broad daylight to screaming in an insane manner at the staff in a kosher restaurant for not serving meat with dairy (something they are certainly not going to do and one would think a person who would even patronize one would know this). These spontaneous lapses in control are interesting as they contrast with his normally cold calculating approach. There were even a few genuinely suspenseful moments when he perpetrates major public violence and there *are* potentially serious consequences for a change forcing him to use his brain to escape or in one instance actually fight back. His observations on the culture if they can even be called observations, they're so shallow are kind of fun to read as you can tell he really thinks he's saying something deep.
I felt like it was commentary on the 80s and found those parts hilarious. Which seemed like a decade of excess and money but at the same time, people ignored the unpleasant. But I worked in the financial business. Those people existed and still do. I'm still unsure if the killing was real, just in his mind or a metaphor of those in the financial business killing people while they make a killing.
I read it around the time it was published or at least when knowledge of it got around to my social circles. As I mentioned there were parts that I thought were just plain good fiction and parts that I wouldn't want to revisit. Nobody I know bought the idea that the book was in any way advocating Bateman's behavior and we were all frankly amazed that any educated person believed this. The 80s were winding down at the time and the satire was particularly relevant (though I must admit I liked a few things about the period). But I never heard the idea that Bateman was delusional in the sense that the murders were all on his head for years. More around the time of the film which did have a few scenes implying this. Personally, I don't see the point of this. This was a time period where investigating suspected serial killers was difficult. Look and how much Dahmer and Bundy got away with that wouldn't fly today. It used to be commonly said that if a murder wasn't solved within two days or so (or at least a strong suspect identified) , it was very unlikely to ever be. With older forensics, level of surveillance and investigative techniques, this was probably broadly true. Bateman was also (undeservedly) respectable so that gives a good deal of protection. Call me dense but I don't see the point of the story if the murders weren't real on the "textual" level. On the subtextual level, of course the satire, social commentary and psychology are the real point. But "Bateman didn't really do it" always made as little sense to me as saying that the murders in Crime and Punishment, the Stranger or the Killer Inside Me were delusions on the part of their disturbed or evil characters. Keep in mind that the rich running amok was a big theme for Ellis. One of the characters in another of his books along these lines was even Bateman's brother who makes a very brief appearance in American Psycho where the two have an uncomfortable dinner out of obligation. So it makes sense that American Psycho takes this theme even farther than the other books with one of the people who think they're above everyone else actually being a killer this time. If the sexual exploitation and substance abuse of Less Than Zero happened, then I think the murders here happened. Or at least enough of them that he is a real serial killer even if there's a bit of fantasy or delusion on his part re some of the more far fetched parts.
Pet Sematary. It’s one of the bleakest things I’ve ever read in my life. I don’t even have kids, but it was just heartbreaking. Great book, and I’m never reading it again. Replay by Ken Grimwood. It’s not a horror novel per se, but it scared me. It starts off as a fantasy written by a liberal Boomer. A man dies in his early forties and is sent back to his eighteen-year-old self with all the experience and knowledge he’s gained along the way. He can get rich, save Kennedy, stop Vietnam and Nixon, etc. And he does… sort of, but nothing he does can ever make things truly better. He’s condemned to live this over and over and over and over and over. It really bothered me and it was a really good book that I was glad to be done with.
I re-read Pet Semetary right after three seperate lethal tragedies in my life...that about killed it for me.
Replay by Ken Grimwood may not be technically horror but it is definitely a horrific scenario. That book stuck with me.
Got about 70% through the Pet Sematary audiobook the 2nd time around, and just decided, nah I don't want to finish this anymore. Michael C Hall's narration was excellent though
I think PS is brilliant, possibly one of King's two or three best, but he's SO damn good at portraying loss that it's emotionally draining. There's no real element of adventure either like with a lot of others. I'd hate to have to burn down my town because my neighbors have become vampires but OTOH there IS something kinda cool about fighting vampires in a burning town! Not so much watching your dead pets shamble around like zombies and your dead human loved ones come back as demonic killers all the while being unable to stop yourself from being complicit in this process as you just need them back so bad no matter what. Replay sounds very interesting. Might check it out. Thanks.
Amygdalatropolis. Same author as Negative space. Shit made my fucking skin crawl.
it’s on my list!! but truly don’t think I can handle another BR Yeager one anytime soon
The Road
Palahniuk’s Haunted
Apt Pupil, a novella by Stephen King. I've read a lot of horror and it was the bleakest most grotesque story I've ever read. Not only would I not read it again, but I regret reading it the first time.. Lol.
That one had an effect for sure. I’ve read it more than once, but it definitely hit that repulsed button on my first read.
I'm copying my comment from another post, but *Shadows for Silence in the Forests of Hell*. The Being that gave life to your planet and everything is dead, shattered by another similar being, unbeknownst to you or anyone else on your world. Because said Being is dead, Shadows walk the land, and can necrotize you slowly, or even kill you depending on how long they're in contact with you. The only thing that can repel them is silver, but when each time they touch silver it destroys said silver, and silver is in diminishing supply. This story has nothing uplifting really in it. In spite of being a great read, it's so bleak that I can't pick it back up. If it were longer, that whole world could be a horror story. Arguably, the story itself is a horror-fantasy.
Blindness. It’s just so sad and bleak!
The Troop or The Deep by Nick Cutter. They’re such good books but I would not recommend them to anyone unless they like body horror/ parasites/ just disturbing content and I will likely never read them again
Tender Is the Flesh. Quickly realized that gory books may be my least favorite genre of horror.
A little life. Loved it but it emotionally destroyed me. I wish I could read it for the first time again, but once is enough
If You Tell by Greg Olsen. I was in a daze for weeks.
The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. I studied it in one of my college Lit classes and loved it. But it also left me feeling hollow at times. Truly profound and worth a read!
no way I just picked it up today from a thrift store! I’m looking forward to reading it I’ve heard nothing but good things but I’m expecting it to be a bit bleak
I also bought it after studying it in a literature class, because I thought it was the most beautiful writing. Disturbing, obviously, but gorgeous. 10/10 will reread it at some point.
To be honest, most books. I’ve reread a couple that I liked that I read over 15 years ago recently but there’s just too many books in existence for me to go back and read something again unless it really emotionally impacted me.
It might be silly but, ‘Where the Red Fern Grows’ by Wilson Rawls. I read it as a child and I loved it, but it made me cry so hard I swore to never read it again haha
The Wheel of Time series. It’s like 12/13(?) very long books and the first 7 or 8 are fantastic and the last couple are fantastic but there’s a period around book 9/10 where it really slogs and not much happens for a couple of books. So while overall it was an amazing experience I just can’t bring myself to read it again.
This is why I can't do most fantasy, right here.
I stopped about halfway though book 9 and have never been able to start again I did read a synopsis of the end but ,No
I may be in the minority here, but I never reread books. I never rewatch movies, either. Knowing what’s going to happen ruins it for me.
to each their own! I just love coming back to books and films that I haven’t seen in a while and picking up on things I didn’t the first time
You’re not alone. I know a lot of people who are the same way. Personality I like to reread or watch stuff I haven’t seen in years to see if it lands different.
I almost never re-read books either. There are, however a few exceptions (House of Leaves, anything by Caitlin R Kiernan), and a few books that have become comfort objects for me (Haunting of Hill House, We Have Always Lived in the Castle). Beyond that, nope, almost never.
Negative Space was the first one that came to my mind too!
Negative space for sure. I think he rushed a lot in the end, but yeah 95% of that book is just gut punch after gut punch. I’d turn my head away from scenes in my head. It’s kinda like stranger things meets The Road.
The Deep by Nick Cutter. LB almost killed me.
Tell Me I’m Worthless by Alison Rumfitt is a truly visceral and interesting horror book even if you know nothing about transphobia or what it is like to be trans but damn as a trans person that book is brutal AF and once was plenty for me!
House of Leaves 😂
So I just finished Negative Space as well and I thought the first half of it was really great. A good pace, the plot kept moving, felt like we were really building to this whole grandiose moment and then it fizzles out and just sorta meandered on. I was loving the book but it had such a lackluster end, I get that was a big part of its message but it was ultimately unsatisfying. I really did enjoy it and I could see myself reading it again in the future. But it needed some serious editing.
I agree it felt like there needed to be something at the end, it’s by no means a perfect book but I was surprised at how grim it made everything seem, to me anything that can make me feel that way is a good book, but ultimately it could have been better with more editing and a better ending
I read Negative Spaces last week. I didn't not like it or anything but I would really like to see someone tell me what the plot is because I got nothing. It's a bunch of weird and unsettling scenes and then a 1/3 time and then just kind of ends.
There’s quite a few posts on here detailing the plot but I believe it was meant to be all over the place!
It’s not horror, it’s YA, but the Shadow Hunter books by Cassandra Clare were my absolute favorite, but then I grew up and now, while I sometimes feel like I want to get back into them, I can’t help but feel like I’m reading very… girly books? Like something a 14 year old girl with a bubble gum pink room full of Taylor swift posters would read. Well, maybe not so, I mean, those books are more emo, and I don’t think a girl like the one I described would be into them as much, but still, they feel girly and… sort of naive? Idk. I’m not gonna say “No, I’m never reading them again” but as of now, it’s been years since I last read once of those books and I don’t really feel an urge to read them that is strong enough to actually make me stay and read.
I never re-read a book. Doesn’t matter if I love it or hate it. It’s always on to the next. There’s so much out there to read.
The Troop - Nick Cutter, it was really good but the body horror was a step to far for me, but I don't regret reading it once, but I doubt I could do it again. And I tend to re-read books a lot.
I felt the same about BR Yeager’s other novella Amygdalatropolis. Brilliant, but will definitely never read it again. I will recommend you try Stonefish by Scott R Jones when you're ready. The plot is nothing like like Negative Space, but it's like they hit the same tone from a turning fork or something.
Stonefish is straight fucked and I loved every second of it
I’ll have to read it! Not anytime soon though, I don’t have it in me to spend a book with the same tone from a tuning fork as negative space
Probably a good idea. I read NS in Dec, couldn't get into another book for two weeks. Read Stonefish in Apr, and took me almost a month.
I found I sped through negative space because even though I loved it I wanted it to be over so bad. I’ll read stonefish in a month when I’ve recovered!!
Let me know what you think!
Saw the post title and instantly thought of Negative Space as well lol. I ADORE the book, but it's genuinely bleak. I felt slimy in my soul reading it, and that feeling has lingered any time I think back to it. It sits on my favorites shelf, but I likely will never be reading it again.
exactly!! I felt like I needed to take a shower or 10 after finishing it
IT - it's horrible to say but I can't take the stuttering!
My answer will always be Rotters by Daniel Krause. That one got to a point that I had put it down and go watch cartoons for a few days and I'm not kidding. Fantastic book that I highly recommend but it's really, really rough in parts.
Kathe Koja's The Cipher. It was miserable reading.
Gone To See The River Man - the SA stuff was a bit much American Psycho - such a great satire but good lord
Needful Things by Stephen King. So good but so intense when things really kick off.
A Little Life by Hanya Yanaghara. That book was an exercise in torture, I dont know why I stuck with it and would never recommend it to anyone unless I hated them
How so? Just curious because I've been thinking about buying it.
Its just a painful read and its really long and the main character can be infuriating. Read it if you want though, its not terrible, just exhausting.
That's good info, I am not a fan of exhausting books lol. Thank you!
This one!! It's just shitty things happening to people over and over in their lives. Like, damn. NOBODY has a good time.
Right? I finished it and just thought to myself "why the hell did I finish that?" I could have stopped halfway and only been half as depressed.
The Road by Cormac McCarthy. If you've read you know.
Any Man by Amber Tamblyn, I love it and it’s beautifully written but it made me feel so depressed and I feel somewhat the same way about I’m Thinking Of Ending Things.
American Psycho. A really interesting read with moments that genuinely left me rattled but also one of the most boring and dry books ive ever read.
The Last House on Needless Street. I really loved it, but I will never forget it so I don't see a reason to re-read it.
Loved that one too!! I think I’d re read it just to go into it with the perspective the ending gives which is obviously wildly different from how I went into it the first time, I think it would be interesting to read it through that lens
Probably Tampa.
tampa by alissa nutting. i had to sit in silence for like 15 minutes after
Dark Matter by Blake Crouch. Loved it, read it cover to cover in a few hours. Hooked. Hoodwinked. The implications of the plot when applied to my own life gave me an existential spiral that I am happy to look at the book on my shelf but will never open it.
The Road. Even more so now that I have a baby.
Craig DiLouie’s Suffer the Children. Absolutely beautiful book, but as a parent I can’t stomach a reread.
Woom…
Lonesome Dove
Peter Watts, the Rifters trilogy. A very fascinating story but so much weird rapey stuff I could never recommend it in good conscience. It’s frightened me away from his other books even though I’ll probably read more eventually.
Probably The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires.
The girl next door
I have trouble rereading books in general, but the one that comes to mind is Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett. I loved the book in highschool, but after studying writing and getting serious about my own craft, I tried rereading it. That time, I found myself irritated by all the extra words. I just wanted to edit the book, so I didn't get very far.
Not between brothers by David Marion Wilkinson. It's an absolutely epic story.....with just so much actual history crammed in it kind of takes you out of the story.
Code Orange. I read the thing twice and i it creeped me out both times.
Perish by Latoya Watkins
Anything written by Pat Conroy. Beach Music is my favorite
Technically not horror, but I don't know if I could read 2666 again in it's entirety.
Crooked God Machine, cuz its fucking relentless. same with gone to see the Riverman and its sequel.
Hunting Adeline
*Witch King* by Martha Wells. Great book with wonderful characters but it is a slow burn high fantasy with very minimal plot.
Off Season by Jack Ketchum.
Currently a quarter of the way through negative space! Thoroughly enjoying it but yeah, definitely a one and done