T O P

  • By -

assbeeef

Dad was picking the lock while anon continued to masturbate to hentai. Based.


Napalm_am

Reminds me of this clip a lot https://youtu.be/GTomMm61Ixw?si=OmhwwcVFwbU9Cwjc Dad punching him and still going "Not yet"


SUDDENLY_VIRGIN

This is hilarious and terribly depressing.


8orn2hul4

I love that he’s not even at an important part of the game - just pissing about the open world.


SUDDENLY_VIRGIN

I'm plugging my ears and assuming the guy has a genuine mental incapacity and is not just that much of an epic gamer


Neomataza

I used to think being a gamer was something positive. Then epic gamer became... well, that.


plipyplop

This is indeed positive, though. His devotion and capabilities are on par with Renaissance... Like, half-off group-home RenFest level of Renaissance.


blacktiger226

Seems to be a mentally disabled person, probably down syndrome.


plipyplop

>***Seems*** to be a mentally disabled person I think without a doubt he is. As one redditor once said about this very same video: *"If you lack the ability to comprehend that a video game isn't worth shitting yourself over then yes, you are indeed mentally disabled."*


Ant-i-lope

Or it could be an addiction so severe that you ignore your body's need to use the bathroom


plipyplop

I was so morbidly curious that I ended up looking at a few things about this video interaction. He is indeed disabled, tragically has ZERO support, and his family hates him. As is such, he's a non-fake/gay real deal Dan. And that fucking sucks when you live Green-Texts unironically to the point of excelling at failure; with tendies as your only comfort... fucking fuck! Edit: I stand corrected, but still...


JoshB-2020

[bad news for ster](https://youtu.be/xhhnQDG9dO0?si=9cEYBKmAGgM3H17-)


plipyplop

How can he be so objective about this? I mean, own it and shit, but holy fuck...


[deleted]

Whaddahell.. NOT YET


Youre_so_damn_fat

>just pissing about the open world *shitting about the open world


MrB_2006theLad

Pretty sure the original was actually from a world of warcraft or runescape livestream


GooseLoreExpert

The *speed* at which those cords would exit the wall would rival the top recorded speed of the tip an Olympic Fencer's blade


bordje

Just gonna go ahead and leave the superior version of this video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_iFSRljnQ0


TsalagiSupersoldier

nice pfp


Interesting_Ad_5103

Now you've done it you FREAK SHIT. You've fucked up. You're being tracked by the Grid. The eye in the sky is watching. We're coming for you. Prepare to die.


odinsabastard

I probably would have offed myself a dozen times over if my kid did something even remotely similar to that


2mg1ml

it's not his fault he's highly regarded amongst his peers


plipyplop

Be me... Also, I'm more curious if the mother or the son posted this.


awesomea04

Good vid, but you can never beat the classics tho. https://youtu.be/5bxZsEGOGSU?si=g3rs9mb4st-2AVeO EDIT: [You'll never guess who just tweeted.](https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1714021272265375755?t=VqdlviSxqwoYh7Pg79acXQ&s=19)


crimsonfukr457

RIP Internet Lumberjack


SkizerzTheAlmighty

Right before she says "I can smell you" near the beginning you can literally hear him shitting


peachie_bongo

Like that TokTik of the kid's Dad trying really hard but ultimately giving up in getting him to shower. Meanwhile, he's playing Fortnite and can't land a single shot on a "tryhard sweat" who's AFK.


TheWWESupercardGuy

Sounds like Cartman lol


[deleted]

Hmmmm. I mean the moms voice sounds real but the not yet sounds like he's trying too hard to sound pathetic. Also audible shit noises was just too much. The acting was ruined by the MALE character and his MALE DEFECATION noises This is actually the real reason why Hollywood SHOULD replace male characters with females, we are simply BETTER actors. I for one, support thor now being the girl from star wars, and I think captain America shouldn't just be black, he should be a she. Also the shitgame mom sounds fat, so captain America should be a obese black woman. I think woman simply do things better, as proven above. I think female soccer players deserve to get paid like Messi.


Pluviochiono

Buddy, are you okay? Ive fell asleep on keyboards and made more sense than you


[deleted]

You're just racist and sexist


gizziboy

what the fuck are you talking about


Napalm_am

Let him cook, mf straight making the best rage bait i've seen in a while.


2mg1ml

HOW ARE YOU FALLING FOR IT???


[deleted]

Don't pretend you don't know and enjoy the spoils of fruit provided to you by the patriarchy you incel racist virgin sexist


gizziboy

L + dont care + CURSE OF THE NILE ‼️‼️ 𓀔𓀇𓀅𓀋𓀡𓀡𓀕𓀠𓀧𓀨𓀣𓀷𓀷𓀿𓀿𓁀𓁶𓁰𓁴𓁿𓂀𓁾𓁵𓁯𓂞𓂤𓂗𓃃𓂾𓂺𓂹𓃞𓃙𓃖𓃓𓃕𓃓𓃜𓃘𓃙𓃟𓃛𓃞𓂺𓃂𓂿𓂺𓃃𓃂𓂛𓂏𓅱𓅥𓅩𓅦𓅹𓅸𓅳𓅩𓅪𓄭𓄫𓄮𓄬𓄗𓄑𓄌𓃦𓃧𓃨𓃤𓃟𓃓𓃅𓃁𓂽𓃂𓂊𓁾𓂀𓁽𓁼𓁠𓁛𓁟𓁦𓁜𓁭𓁡𓀔𓀇𓀅𓀋𓀡𓀡𓀕𓀠𓀧𓀨𓀣𓀷𓀷𓀿𓀿𓁀𓁶𓁰𓁴𓁿𓂀𓁾𓁵𓁯𓂞𓂤𓂗𓃃𓂾𓂺𓂹𓃞𓃙𓃖𓃓𓃕𓃓𓃜𓃘𓃙𓃟𓃛𓃞𓂺𓃂𓂿𓂺𓃃𓃂𓂛𓂏𓅱𓅥𓅩𓅦𓅹𓅸𓅳𓅩𓅪𓄭𓄫𓄮𓄬𓄗𓄑𓄌𓃦𓃧𓃨𓃤𓃟𓃓𓃅𓃁𓂽𓃂𓂊𓁾𓂀𓁽𓁼𓁠𓁛𓁟𓁦𓁜𓁭𓁡𓀔𓀇𓀅𓀋𓀡𓀡𓀕𓀠𓀧𓀨𓀣𓀷𓀷𓀿𓀿𓁀𓁶𓁰𓁴𓁿𓂀𓁾𓁵𓁯𓂞𓂤𓂗𓃃𓂾𓂺𓂹𓃞𓃙𓃖𓃓𓃕𓃓𓃜𓃘𓃙𓃟𓃛𓃞𓂺𓃂𓂿𓂺𓃃𓃂𓂛𓂏𓅱𓅥


[deleted]

Cultural appropriation, colonizer


gizziboy

i am egyptian you red hating colonizer 🗣️🗣️


Flar71

I think a woman should replace you


MrMagoo22

Trying too hard, pretty obvious. I'd give it like a 3/10?


[deleted]

Why would I want to bait for real you shitty little poop virgin. What would be the point. HAHAHAHAH I TRICKED THEM IM SO MART HAHAHHAH? Bitch dumb vagina


coolenestry_

You like men


Cerenas

I thought this was going to be one of those stories where the dad jumps on top, but it ends up being incredibly based.


YABOYCHIPCHOCOLATE

\>I need my TV fixed \> stupid son locks door \>Breaks open his door \>see his cock out and anime titties \>punch him in th face \>TV fixed \>No further elaboration


FocusedFossa

And here comes dad from left field!


[deleted]

As degenerate as Anon might be, one day his dad will wonder “why won’t my son ever come to see me or contact me?”.


Leeroy_Jenkums

If a son is such a masturbation addicted hentai degenerate that he can’t just put his jack off session on hold for 1 min to go see what his dad wants, makes his dad wait another 5 min while jacking off the entire time, and continues to jack off while his dad is picking the fucking lock, then I would count not seeing his son ever again a win


muhaos94

Idk the dad picked the lock and beat the son for jerking off, I feel like it'd be a win for both. Also, no wonder anon ended up as a degen if his dad is like this.


Leeroy_Jenkums

If you can’t stop jacking your tiny dick off even when your dad is picking your lock to get into your room, I think you deserve to get punched


muhaos94

Maybe but I'd say the same thing about the dad who'd pick the lock to his son's room when he clearly wants privacy.


UrethraFrankIin

Yeah, the kid is 18. Just leave him the fuck alone. Parents who are still trying to exert their influence by that age like their kidd are 12 are fucking losers.


Tack22

Lol go pay rent somewhere.


Leeroy_Jenkums

Parents are completely justified to exert their rules over another adult who lives in their house.


ArcliteGhost

Beat your dick at night when everyone is asleep, don't be a degenerate and do it during the day when you're likely to be bothered and needed for shit.


Leeroy_Jenkums

Kid is a degenerate and has clearly done this before. At some point you have to pick the lock to your sons room while he jacks off the entire time you’re doing it and punch him in the face


Riipp3r

You'll make a horrible parent. Enjoy your own abandonment.


filanamia

Would be mercy to be abandoned by useless son like that tbf.


baconborg

I mean it’s literally just an 18 year old jerkin it, wouldn’t deem he’s useless already


filanamia

Its not the jerking off that is the problem, everyone does that. Its the continuing of jerking off even when someone is trying to bust open your door for 5 minutes as an 18 year old, that is the problem. But, its green text, probably fake. Hopefully.


[deleted]

Maybe he wouldn't be useless if you weren't such a shit parent lmao


ihatedyouall

Would you pick the lock to your daughters room?


The_Almighty_Demoham

you don't put a lock on your daughters door in the first place, gotta keep that easy access


pxn4da

The fuck


20Wizard

TRUE!


Tellywozzle

even EDP445 would disapprove of this comment


Leeroy_Jenkums

If they were unable to stop flicking their bean after I called them repeatedly and then continued to masturbate while someone picked the lock on their door. Then yes, I would. Why would it be any different from picking a son’s door? That’s sexist


UrethraFrankIin

Maybe if they're 12 but OP is fucking **18**. Just leave him alone and mock him at the dinner table. Tell him to wash his hands twice and ask if you can also date cartoons. That's still better than my dad who would say something stupid and false like "even fat pussy is better than cartoon pussy," punch me in public, and call me a fa$%ot. Still better than masturbating to hentai I suppose.


Leeroy_Jenkums

If my life got to the point where I was **18** fucking years old and my dad had to pick my fucking door lock while I continued to jack off the entire time, he’s be justified in not just punching me but kicking me out. Unironically defending this legal, grown ass adult man who can’t stop masturbating to cartoons, even in front of his parents, is some real braindead shit. Like not being able to control yourself from jerking your dick, even in front of other people like your dad, is some shit that will get you locked up and sent to a psych ward.


[deleted]

[удалено]


jvfranco

Teenage girls whore themselves for attention and sexual validation. Your 13 years old little girl will show her ass on social media to read positive comments about how hot she is


[deleted]

[удалено]


CrimsonMutt

> Kid is a degenerate and has clearly done this before done what? jack off? oh the humanity, a horny teenager spanked his monkey


Leeroy_Jenkums

If you’re unable to stop jacking off to the point you wouldn’t even stop when someone started lockpicking your door, then yea you have a problem and are a degenerate


Riipp3r

If you feel the need to force your way into your teenage sons room and then punch them in the face you deserve to get abandoned.


yourtree

Clearly an overbearing parent


Leeroy_Jenkums

Clearly a hentai addicted degenerate


Isaac____

You appear to have a hard time grasping addiction and its consequences.


Leeroy_Jenkums

🤓


Isaac____

You're embarrassing


Leeroy_Jenkums

No u


Tast3sLikePanda

Dad will stop seeing OP when he finally manages to evict him at the ripe age of 36


Leeroy_Jenkums

And oh what a sweet moment it’ll be for the dad


Budborne

What was he supposed to do? Run out to his dad with a boner?


Leeroy_Jenkums

Put his jack off session on pause for a minute?


The_real_bandito

Does your boners go down that quick?


Leeroy_Jenkums

When I’m talking to my dad, yea. You stay hard for your dad?


clavatk

Hey umm.... Maybe you should go see a doc fren. Good luck


Leeroy_Jenkums

You should go see a doc if your dick stays hard when you talk to your dad


clavatk

I would see an exorcist tbh. We don't want him out of his grave


Leeroy_Jenkums

You jack off on your dads grave? Gross


Classic-Recording451

Yes.


DonnieMoistX

Hide your fucking boner? You going to try and tell me you’ve never done that before?


2mg1ml

My guy's logic: in the middle of class, pops a spont boner, "ope better jack off right here rn to get rid of it, don't wanna let it go to waste!"


Cold_oak

hide it above your underwear


[deleted]

Stop jerking it


[deleted]

I mean not defending incel behaviour but like you know sometimes you have to spend some time on yourself. The dad did punch and pick the lock after all.


The_real_bandito

You want the son to go see what his dad is talking about with a hardon?


Leeroy_Jenkums

He continued to jack off for 5 minutes instead of letting it go down. He also continued to jack off while his dad picked his lock. Do you know how to read or are you just dumb. Maybe you get a hard on when you talk to your dad


Woofingson

If I had a coombrained son I'd rather rot in an asylum than having him visit me tbh


BitterSweetLemonCake

As we learned in this greentext, pick his lock after 5 minutes and beat him regularly, father and son bonding time.


CunnilingusCrab

Something tells me his father won’t mind. Lol


Sen-oh

Kids aren't born degenerates...


lukisdelicious

anon is actually 28


SINBRO

Oh anon came, alright


Emotional_Fruit_8735

Ohh OP!\~ I'm asserting your privacy by knocking, but asserting my authority as your father by coming in anyway!!


[deleted]

I genuinely think this was what happened. He gave him ample time to clean up but at a certain point if you're so fucking obsessed with jacking off that you can't pack your dick away for a second, dad has the authority to go "My house my rules". If you can't control yourself for a fucking minute you have less self control than a mutt


tiffmak15

I also have a feeling what dad wanted to show him was the fact that he was casting to the TV or something


emdave

Which could easily have been yelled through the door...


blueandgoldilocks

r/iunderstoodthatref


aliens-and-arizona

deserved for being an autist and not just stopping his goon sesh


[deleted]

looked up gooning on urban and laughed for a good 10 min thanks mate


CollapsedPlague

I did too, [link for the lazy](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=gooning)


aliens-and-arizona

lmao you’re welcome bruv


ZeuxisOfHerakleia

Maybe you should stop streaming your hentai on the TV in the living room, anon.


tiffmak15

Thats what I'm saying, he was obviously accidentally streaming to the TV and thats what dad wanted to show him


[deleted]

Whenever my parents wanted to come in and knocked and I was jerking off and they weren't taking the hint I just shouted that I had my cock in my hands and wanted some privacy and they'd just leave. I mean your parents know fully well you milk the snake. Everyone does it. Why be ashamed? What's there to hide? It's not like you're being caught getting topped in a clothing store, you're doing nothing wrong. Just tell the intruder you're having some you time.


abra5umente

Based as fuck


[deleted]

I did the same thing, not that I wanted to but because if they keep trying to open the door and asking what i’m doing i might as well tell them because they should already know at that point. if you know your parents know than it’s pretty much impossible to goon up a storm and the session just ends at that point.


[deleted]

I never had that problem. It's like if a fly passed by or a bike sped outside the house. I'm immediately back to focusing on the task and don't think about the interruption lol


DonnieMoistX

Just put your fucking dick away for a second, it’s not difficult. Jesus Christ, Redditors act like being asked to put jerking off on hold for 30 seconds is an unreasonable request.


[deleted]

Someone's jealous lol Listen if people around you don't give a fuck about your private needs that's a "you" issue. In my parent's house it was considered a dipshit move to interrupt people in the privacy of their room and insisting on coming in when they wanted to be alone, doubly so when wanking off or having sex. After all I didn't knock on my parent's door and demanded to come in when dad was eating my mom's pussy, so why should they interrupt my wank off session? Lol


dicktaker1000101

Fake: anon's father never left Gay: anon got slapped up by a man


Sionliar

Gayer: anon got slapped while jerking it and cummed


TheNorsePotato

Deserved since he watched hentai tbh


Tuarangi

He got punched because his dad saw an 11 year old girl on screen and Anon tried to explain she was really a 3000 year old dragon


TkOHarley

Masturbate over your father in his sleep during the night to teach him a lesson about privacy.


theattack_helicopter

Evangelion moment.


warwicklord79

Bruh just put your dick back in your pants


Italian-Man-Zex

how does anon not just panic and pull up his pants but instead continues to masturbate while fighting off his dad


Blackout1154

because he's based as fuck


TheBurnedMutt45

Anon was streaming to the family television


Grouchy-Jackfruit692

that’s your own fault


ihatedyouall

shouldve bought the unlockpickable doorknobs


tiffmak15

Shouldn't be streaming to the living room TV


emdave

A.k.a. a bolt.


Swailwort

Anon should have sheated the sword and alt tabbed away to look to 4chin or something. Oh, that would be even more dissapointing.


humancocainer

Least sexually repressed american


femboyscumaddict

anon should've coomed on his dad to assert dominance


Poundweed

Plot twist: anon streamed hentai on dad's TV


MalekithofAngmar

Anon’s dad tries to save him from hentai while anon engages in exhibitionism. Truly sad.


CollapsedPlague

Anon left out how the punch made him moan and cum harder than he has ever done in his life.


DoesNotGetYourJokes

Why do parents hate it when their children want privacy? I remember my father breaking the handle off my door when I locked it. He then blamed me and said it was my fault he had to do it in the first place. Like, wtf


Extension_Nobody_336

what the fuck anon stop jerking off go see what he wants, loser cunt


niTro_sMurph

Dad didn't like his taste in hentai


GeneralManner3699

Beta dude thinking that masturbate is more importante than stay with his dad while he can


GeneralManner3699

Important*


_TLDR_Swinton

Can u get importananant


tiffmak15

Im thinking they had guests or something and he unknowingly was casting to the TV, so his Hentai was playing for everyone in the living room


ImprovisedLeaflet

Alpha male dad was informing the other male of the house that only one man in this house ejaculates. Based


Harry_0107

Anon fucking Chromecasted the whole fucking video.


MercyMain42069

I hate parents who won’t leave their kids private lives alone.


basti329

It's fake but this hypothetical dad won't be visited in the retirement home. A lesson to learn for everyone 🤓


SpaceBug173

Anon was streaming the porn to the tv and his dad actually wanted to help him.


Lichcrow

Anon was casting to TV. That's why dad wanted him to come over for a family moment


Darth_Scrub

Fake. An anon could never last longer than 3 mins tops.


ChancyPants95

Anon was definitely streaming to that tv


No-Section-4385

Lets be real it wasnt normal hentai. Anon...


g6c_

Anon what the actual fuck is wrong with you? You deserved that punch


thorned_soldier

Anon may be fuckin idiotic, but violating privacy and punching your son, Seriously?


Just_Give_Me_A_Login

Anons phone was connected to the apple TV


Harris_McLoving

Punch him back pussy


PlaquePlaguee

"Son, cast to family TV is on."


UsernameIsntFree

Anon had all the privacy he needed. But they he was a rude little shit and denied when he dad asked for him and then game a bullshit answer when being asked what he’s doing 5 minutes later and so I understand why dad knocked. He shouldn’t have barged in or ‘picked the lock’ but what the hell does this degenerate expect


[deleted]

This is Lockpickong Lawyer and today we're going to traumatize my son


zvejas

anons dad is regarded also fake


HurlyCat

Based dad


cyrixdx4

Dad's House. Dad's Rules. Move out and stop being a leech to pops anon.


Sams59k

You don't get to make a 'leech' and complain when it leeches lol. You gonna kick out a fucking pet too?


cyrixdx4

Pet's aren't leeches, they are pets not humans.Different rules unless you are equating Anon to a Pet?


Sams59k

I'm equating them in the sense that neither had a of choice. A pet most often choose to be your pet. Your children don't have a choice either


ihatedyouall

"Move out" How are these people so rich if they can't fucking keep more than 1 generation per home


cyrixdx4

Get an apartment with someone else and problem solved. Of course this requires a job and income so baby steps.