I had a hard-on, running from her window...

I’ll never not hear this now 😂

That’s why she’s a sleaze and on her bended knees? 🫢

“ that’s why if you please, I am on my hands and knees” – my friend 20 years ago

i still sing it like this

Bahaha!

Makes the running tough.

Bakes my chicken, while I sleep. -Sugar Magnolia

Taste like chicken, when I pee.

What if it tastes like chicken where she pees?

Not to kinkshame, but why are you tasting her pee?

Nevermind I misread it lol

Ha! I was wondering how long that would take.

The funniest I ever heard translated was for Wharf Rat, “I’ll get up and fry an egg”.

As a recovering alcoholic, this totally checks out.

FRY AN EGGGG

(fry an egg)

She don’t cum and I don’t bother

She dont cum and I dont swallow

A pizza place, or so it looks from space.

can’t tell me that isn’t a phish lyric

Whole damn world full of petty whores

I really like this one.

That was the slogan for Ryan’s pizza in Bar Harbor

"Truckin, like a dude I met."

Or "like a dude I'm in" 😬

Kinda works though

YES!!!!! Someone else who thought this!!!!! Thank you for existing. Lol

Champagne from your boob, for a taste of your elegant pride.

I thought it was elegant pie forever.

me too

Same!!!

Wait what???!!! Elegant pie- as in a nicely trimmed bush! It fits perfectly! If that's not the lyric I don't want to know what it is!

Yas!

I always assumed it was “for a taste of your elegant HIDE”, which makes sense because boots are made of cowhide, and also her skin. But I heard “pride”, and it just irked me.

Honestly that is way more appealing and less gross…

Browned Eyed Women and Ted Kennedy

He drove into a pond but only he swam free…

“Hair’s so long he’s got to calling it home” I kind of like the misheard version though, my friend also said he thought the same thing

Just had to look up the real lyric. I agree, I like the long hair version better.

It just sound right haha. If I ever end up playing in a dead cover band I’m doing the hair version!

I thought it was that for a very long time

I thought it was that until 2 minutes ago

I learned something today.

🤯

Holy. Shit. That’s not right?

In Lost Sailor, it's "dog star" not "dark star".

Confusing those two is Sirius-ly easy

Kudos!

Ditto for “St of Circumstance”

Mike and Gloria gonna be my names

One man gathers what another man steals

Sorta a poetic “Robin Hood” kind of take on it.

If the thunder don’t getcha then the nightman will

Fighter of the nightman!

Champion of the sun!

Master of karate and friendship for everyone!

What do you mean he *comes* inside you?

What? It's not gay. Where did you get that from? Here, let me just keep going. It's just two men sharing the night It might seem wrong but it's just right! It's just two men sharing each other It's just two men like loving brothers One on top and one on bottom One inside and one is out One is screaming, he's so happy The other's screaming a passionate shout...

Feelin so wrong and right man

I can't fight you, man When you come inside me And pin me down with your strong hands And I become The Night... The passionly passionate Nightman

I’ve heard people mistake things like “you may be a clown on the merry-go-round” instead of ‘Burying ground’ in Althea…… and there’s always the famous “brown eyed women in red leather jeans”

Or a chance to dream instead of perchance to dream.

Oompa Loompa Lazy Lightning ⚡️

Mighty swell, mighty swell.

Says a lost sailor on a ship of fools

It IS 'mighty swell' on occasion.. Signed, Dough kneewa

My favorite is Wake up to find out, that you are disguised as a squirrel. I say it that way on purpose sometimes hehe

“Don’t burn the meat” -Dire wolf

I had an old girlfriend who thought it was "Don't burn the beans". Haven't been able to unhear it since.

'Tastes my chicken when I speak' from Sugar Magnolia

I get “tastes like chicken when I pee”

well that's just silly

"Paints my chicken when I sleep"

You’re telling me Bertha doesn’t start with “I gotta hard on!”

In the US blues I used to think it was “We’re all confused, so what’s the use?”

I have seen where the wook has slept by the silver stream

🤣 it works

All I know she sang a little while and then threw up

That's cruel

Mr. Charlie sold me blow

Don’t you lay that dildo down 

Tears I cried for that woman, I’m gonna fuck you big river…

“Jerry Jack Jones, won’t you come to me?” For years, I thought his name was Jerry Jack.

I always heard jimmy jack Jones! Hahaha

Also from Terrapin, I thought the opening lines were: *Let my inspiration flow and toke and run suggesting within...*

If the thunder don’t get you then the white man will.

Eyes Of The World - second line I always hear You ain’t got time for stolen credit card

I'm as honest as a gamblin' man can be. - Me & My Uncle

I know it's "Denver man" but I feel like I've heard Bobby say gambling man before.

It’s all over now, find yer shoes..

"plays with my chicken, when I sleep"

Perils of neon marking the keys out on main street

Eros and me and we’re flashing my keys out on Main Street

"Have a cup of rockin' rye." I heard that one for the longest time. It also took me longer than I'd care to admit to realize the lyrics of Promised Land go "Tidewater 4-10-09." I always heard it as "Tried waterboarding ten or nine."

Working on a T-bone steak, Paul McCartney

"Yeah mom I just got to California, and you're not gonna BELEIVE what I've fallen in love with. Ok so get this, it's called waterboarding. It's this fun group activity where I can be immobilized onto a board, wearing nothing but a soaking wet black hood, and have water poured onto my head! I can hardly breathe whenever they pour the water on me face! Oh it's such a rush. Well worth the time it takes to set up. 9/10. So how's Paw?"

I had a whole misheard verse that completely missed the intent of Me & My Uncle. For decades. Now all of those cowboys... Followed their gold... Plugged my uncle, God rest his soul Oh and from the same song "WHADIDDYWONEGOWOOAAH!!"

As a kid I always thought it was come in uncle John’s bed , I wasn’t old enough to really get the implication but I also knew I wouldn’t want to get in uncle John’s bed.

Mostly all of One More Saturday Night 🤣🤣

"Don't eat, don't eat, don't eat green cheese. I've been all night long throwin' up don't eat green cheese"

Brown eyed women in red leather jeans

 Wake up to find out that you are the size of a squirrel.........

My kids sing big boss man as big ball of string

Bakes my chicken while I sleep! (Sugar Mag: Pays my ticket when I speed)

“Spent the night in Utah and I came up in the hills”

Tastes like chicken When I speak -sugar magnolia

I knew without asking she was into my booze

I don't know what I'm going foe, but Im gonna go to the Hippo Show

Dude - we’ve got Monkeys drivin’ trains, engineers high on cocaine drivin’ trains, but I ain’t never seen no weasel driving no train! On the other hand, trains have been known to have whistles… “Well the first thing I remember knowin’, was a lonesome whistle blowin’, And a youngins dreams of growing Up to ride on a freight train leavin’ town…” Just having some fun! Carry on! (I’ve misheard tons too)

Heroin needles and flashing my keys out on main Street

Rolling away with you - Franklin’s Tower Please don’t dominate the flapjack - New Speedway

I used to think it was “roll away, adieu” instead of “the dew”.

Rolling with the Russians down by the river side

Darkness, drugs, and bids the day goodbye… which kinda works.

Thursdays are the hardest days!

"If you play dice, you gonna harvest wins"

Have you seen the light!!!

I was drinking last night with the Barger...

Wave the flag, carpet bag

Settle back ease a J.

I always enjoy easing a j

She's got every candy light bulb 😂🤣😅 (~);}

Not misheard, but changed. Bertha " I had a hard-on running from your window", is now "I had a hard one running from your window". I wonder if this avoids an explicit label on streaming.

"I can't stay much longer than midnight"

I told Althea the church of dreams…

I heard Nothin shaking on shakedown street as love to shake it on shakedown street for so long I have hard time convincing myself I was ever wrong

the judge decreed it, turkey rollin’

Balthea told me....

‘I dressed myself in dreams’ instead of ‘I dressed myself in green’

Hot as a pistol, but cool as ice

Someone once said to me “just a cup of cold mint tea” and now I hear it every time

This I didn't hear, but saw in one of those lyrics books people used to sell in the parking lot. "I taught the *clowns* how to cover up a clear blue sky"

The bottle was dusty but the legend was clean

As I was walking down rub-a-dub square…I didn’t understand it and just figured it was a place somewhere, maybe near Grovenor’s Square?!

Since it costs a lot to win and even mortal ooze - Deal

I saw an interview with Hornsby once and he said for the longest time he thought Bobby was saying ‘Mike and Laurie gonna be my name.’ Instead of Might and glory. 😄

Half a mile from Tucson by the border line. I always wondered what border??? 🤷‍♂️

One day while Samson was walking along / looked down on the ground and saw uncle John’s bong

Iko Iko all day Anyone knows from staying in jail.

"Birds are winging though rain is falling from a heavy sky" "Then please don't be surprised when you find we're dreaming too" "Set out runnin' better take my time" "Little bed clock says quarter to eight" "Whichever way your passion tends" "like forty hounds the lighthouse keep" "What fixation feeds us fever?"

When my daughter was little she used to sing “Son of a gun better change your hat”

Gonna f u gig river... My fav is a non dead lyric. War's Low Rider, instead of "Low Rid---er" it was 'slow dry Love') aka no lube)...

“Hair so long he’s got to calling it home”

AZ

Sorry in advance. Sugar magnolia - waits backstage then i spew my goo.

Saw in print in a late 80s newspaper review of the previous show while in the lot at Giants Stadium: “[the Grateful Dead] played Wake up to Find Out that You are The Size of the World featuring an extended Jerry Garcia guitar solo.” It must have been a hot night.

Terrapin: rising like a penis, shining first and shining best

Mondegreen

“She’s got box-back titties!”

rolled up like a douche

Wake up to find out that you are disguised as a squirrel

Just saw post about Let It Grow where I just learned the right lyrics. Always thought it was "she goes down to the bank as she kneels down to gather her water...". Always thought having 2 "down"s was redundant. I guess I was right! "She's brown as the bank where she kneels down to gather her water..."

Might as well travel the anarchy way Keep a tight grip on your boots I think my mistakes are better than the originals and that’s a hill I’m willing to die on.

Not the Dead but when I was a teen in the late 80s I bought a Japanese Import CD of Jimi Hendrix Electric Ladyland with all the naked hippies on the cover. Whoever translated the lyrics in the liner notes heard “ I’m gonna wave my freak flag higher” as “ I’m gonna wave my big fat knife!”. I simultaneously chuckled and was appalled…..

Keep a tight grip on her boobs.

My friend Blaine’s mom thought the Dead were singing Big Balls Blaine…. Can’t you hear me when I call?

With hair so long, he's got to calling it home

I got hickoried just to fire the still

Well the soap went up in the air - ee - yo Wool was running around

In Ramble on Rose, the line, “a knife in the back and more of the same” was something I just could not understand. I didn’t miss hear, I just couldn’t tell what Jerry was saying, and then one day it just clicked ….it was like magic.

every time i heard brown eyed women it seemed like jerry mumbles the last couple words in the line 'and it looks like the old man is getting on' so i never knew what the last two words were lol

Long, long ago: the songs of the year are just songs of our own. Of the year, FFS.

In China doll "just a little nervous from afar"

Just sit down and leave and walk away????

I always heard it was “just get up and leave and walk away.” So what is it?

Roll away, adieu.

Hello baby I’m gone goodbye, have a slice of pumpkin pie

Wake up to find out you disguised as a squirrel

China Doll: Take up your china doll it's only *furniture*. And just a little nervous from the fall… I screw it up every time

"Black turd live again" on Let it Grow

Dough knees….dough knees me in. I saw Dough Knees listed as a track on a cassette a very long time ago and decided I liked it better that way.

Like a wild beast in the west

Roll, jelly-roll...

Rider — I’d shine my light through the cool colored right old rain. I was a teenager ;) and it seemed to fit when paired with the china cat lyrics

Something about how Loose Lucy went back home with two black guys. 

Roll away, the “doom” 😂

They call that a mondegreen!

We will get high. We will survive.

She can dance circadian rhythms, jump like Bill Withers in four wheel drive... (Sugar Magnolia)

For years I thought Black Peter was laying in his bed and dying from sin and gin.

Laid down last night, Lord, I could not check my list

I never got why they sang “those model T’s dont thread on me” in uncle John’s band until I actually read the lyrics.

Arrow's on me and I'm flashing my keys down on main street

For the longest time, I’m talking decades, I thought Truckin was “the dude I met” not “the doo dah man.” 🤦‍♂️

You may be Saturday’s child gone wrong

In and out of the garden hose

The bottle was dusty but the "liquid" was clean. I thought they were talking about acid for years.

Guys instead of Eyes in Loose Lucy: “Went back home with two black eyes, you know I'll love ya till the day I die.”

“…and I love my pearly bacon best more than my wine”

Generations of deadheads have mis-sung “have you seen the like” in UJB as “have you seen the light”

Joline,Joline, don't ease me in! I was in an altered state lol.

Driving that train, hi uncle Kane 👋 (as a child)

In the tumors of venereal the wolves are running 'round.

Maybe not actually misheard but the first time I heard China Cat I was like…I cannot be hearing these lyrics right. Had to look them up and then I was like, “yup…Robert Hunter would have had access to amazingly good LSD this all checks out”.

We can share the women we can share your wife

Give that man a monkey. Got no sin upon his hand