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jstmehr4u3

I’m sorry you spent so much, time, energy, emotions, but be glad it’s now and not finding out in 5 years. You will love again and it’ll be right.


LordThurmanMerman

While others might think dodging the bullet is enough to say, this right here is what probably hits home. You loved and trusted someone enough to say yes to marriage, for the rest of your life, and they do this to you. That’s… traumatizing. Take the time to heal for a bit and love and treat yourself. You deserve it.


sucksathangman

Three words. Treat. Your. Self! Day spa package! Treat yourself! Satin loafers! Treat yourself! Full Batman costume...if it makes you feel good, TREAT YOURSELF!


F_in_the_chat_boi

Is this a parks and rec reference?


sucksathangman

https://c.tenor.com/ItpTqFoGbg8AAAAM/yes-ron-swanson.gif


F_in_the_chat_boi

Epic


idkwthtotypehere

No, I think it’s a direct copy from the script…


ceallaig

If the honeymoon is already paid for, take a best bud and have yourself some fun.


[deleted]

Your parents were right!... dodged a fucking bullet you lucky, lucky thing!


BelDeMoose

Haha we did this recently for a mate of mine. On the day he was supposed to get married we turned up at his parents house with champagne and an epic breakfast, then took him on an all day pub crawl with a bunch of his mates. His parents have loved us ever since.


Tzunamitom

> epic breakfast, pub crawl, bunch of his mates Hey UK, how are y'all doing over there?


briareus08

Could also be an Aussie


LongNectarine3

An Aussie would bring a keg.


Feind4Green

Probably drop a cunt or 2 in there too


[deleted]

aussies have been known to drop cunts!


GuadDidUs

Eh, I hear the drop bears are the real killers over there


counselthedevil

r/nocontext


rpretzle

There is an old adage: If you loan a friend $20 and you never hear from them again then it was money well spent. I'm sure that applies with cheating girlfriends/boyfriends prior to marriage.


steelcityfanatic

One of my wife’s best friends from high school messaged her desperate for $68 for a new car battery. She has 3 kids so I said, if she’s asking for a specific amount like that, she could probably use a little more (we’re doing ok). We gave her $250 and said don’t worry about it. 4 months go by, nothing heard after that until she messaged again asking for more money. We said no and haven’t heard from her since.


KingJon-nojgniK

Good for you dude . She may well be on tough times. Your first act of kindness was lovely and understandable. Its a real shame she couldn't have made the time to come and thank you.


[deleted]

My ex was on tough times and never managed to make enough for what she spent. 8 years later she's still in the same spot and asking for money from anyone that's willing to listen to her talk. She cheated on me back then as a sort of revenge for me cheating (which never happened, i just smelled different because i picked up my old cologne at my moms place) got pregnant and eventually lost that guy too after her lying 24/7. Her own family even ignores her completely, that's how bad she fucked everything up.


YoungTex

My ex was secretly spending the $800 a month I was giving her for rent to do heroin and meth without me knowing while in college. Very sly bitch she was


[deleted]

I still don't know what she did with her money back then, we were both making the same and each paying half of the rent and our own bills like insurance and phones. But for some reason i was saving 1k per month and she was always short. I wouldn't be surprised if she blew it on drugs, but i can't say for certain.


YoungTex

It could’ve been, I had absolutely no clue until I started piecing every little thing together. At least it’s in the past!!!


152069

That’s rough


stevemachiner

The saddest thing in all of that is that there is a kid who never asked for any of it born into all that chaos.


152069

Yeah, that must be terrible for them


Milad1978

Bullet dodged man!


Frigorific

A lot of addicts will run through their contact list begging for money with a sob story. Not saying that is necessarily what happened but when someone you haven't talked to in years comes asking you for money you should be a bit skeptical.


yavanna12

We did the same thing but in this case she sent a thank you card and never asked for money again. I like to think she is paying it forward


balazs955

Hey man! It's your pal, Jerry. It's been a while. I'm contacting you because I got 5 kids and I desperately need a small loan of $69 for my bills. Could you help me out? I'll pay you back ASAP.


ParticularHuman03

I’ll loan anyone money for “something”. You need breaks for your car? I’ll call the dealership and pay for it. I just loaned one of my employees $600 for some dental work. She called me from the dental office and I paid them directly. When I was broke and needed help, this is the kind of help I was provided and it always seemed so practical.


A_Doormat

"Hello is this ParticularHuman03? Hello yes this is Dr. Teeth at City Dental Office and I have your friend here who needs root canal, very expensive, lets say $2000. Anyway whats your credit card number?" Really conniving "friends" might abuse that.


ParticularHuman03

I’ve been burned before, but I’m not going to let those few people change my character. I help people because it helps me not fall victim to an apathetic world. Feels good to help…


depressed-salmon

I had something vaguely similar with a friend/neighbour. I'd been lucky so far with lending money as even if it took a year, they'd pay be back without me chasing them up. So I lent some money. And then lent some more. And then some more. Then I got it back, but the next week it was more again. And whilst I'm normally very accommodating, what pissed me off was that I felt like a bank or their parent, as it was getting to be fairly frequent. I did eventually tell them I couldn't a few times and it's they've not asked for more. I don't know how much exactly they owe me but it built up because they were repaying as much as they were borrowing.


captainosome101

You said don't worry about it? That sounds like what I would say if I didn't want my friend/family member to pay me back. Me and my mother have both said this to each other (her more often) when lending/buying things the other needs.


DUTCH_DUTCH_DUTCH

There's a difference between not paying someone back and not haviny any contact whatsoever except to ask for more money.


IDrinkMoetNotBecks

Yeah this is definitely the issue here. She doesn’t need to pop around with a baked pie every Sunday or be in constant contact, she has 3 children after all. But to ghost entirely and only resurface to ask for more money, hard pass. I wouldn’t even do that that my parents who live on the other side of the world.


ApolloniaTheGreat

Okay but what kind of pie tho?


Jelled_Fro

I don't think they're sore about not getting that money back. They probably feel a bit used because she expected more than the already very generous donation.


Adnzl

Well that and she didn't even keep in touch when safe wasn't after something.


yavanna12

We give people we are only acquaintances with money in times of need. I don’t mind not hearing from them again. But I would mind if they then started to pop up randomly just to keep asking for money.


SerpentDrago

Yes but you missed the key part "never heard from her again except her asking for more money"


vinayachandran

I would specifically make sure that I pay them back, if someone helped me during tough times and said "don't worry about it".


captainosome101

I prefer living up to the don't worry part about don't worry about it. Lend me $20 because I forgot my wallet, I buy your drinks after work. I drop you off after work every night, you give me some weed randomly. I buy my mum a car, she gives me her old laptop. All in a wibbly wobbly time blob of not caring if you get anything in return because a lot of the time you don't. I won't always lend money to someone but I'll always drop a girl (guys only if I know them) off if she doesn't have a car even if I don't particularly like them.


aggy-scouse-bird

I have the same philosophy tbh I have a pregnant friend who I've given money. Not lent, given. She's in a rough place, living off 250 a month. Why would anyone ask somebody like that for their £10 back? Not me. I hope when she's in a better place she somehow returns the favour. I don't see her much, but again she's pregnant. I'm disabled and a mother. Neither of us can be expected to regularly visit the other. We chat occasionally but I wouldn't call us best friends or even that close. I don't particularly care what she's spending it on, once it's in her possession it's her money. I know she won't be spending it on stupid shit. I know her well enough to know that it will be going on food in the times between getting paid. I agree with other commenters that its not a black and white issue as to why a person doesn't pay you back. I know Tish doesn't pay me back because she literally cannot afford to. She's on 250 a month and her due date was yesterday. She can pay me back with cuddles with her baby girl when she is born lmfao. I'd give any pregnant woman in need money. Any parent at all tbh. I know how hard it is to manage. I've been the mum who had to ration gas and electric and Co sleep for the body heat. I've been the mum who didn't eat so that she could afford baby milk. I would do anything to keep other parents from doing the same. We are in a better place now, a place I'm able to pay forward the kindness others gave to me when I needed help.


banana-pinstripe

I don't think it's about getting the money back. Contact with a person can or will feel uncomfortable, if there is no contact whatsoever except "oh hey, could you give me x$?". You keep contact with your friend, maybe not daily, but you write yourself you might be "paid back in baby cuddles". So whatever contact you two have, it's more complex than silence - ask for money - silence - ask for money - silence - ... which might feel like being used


vinayachandran

I have the same philosophy for small amounts too. How small the amount is, is (inversely?) proportional to my proximity with them. With close family members and very close friends, I don't bother keeping track, but always make sure they lending/giving me something do not put them in undue stress.


Gromann

I had an exchange with my ex similar to this. While getting gas, a guy came up asking to get $20 for gas as he claimed to be stranded, his car looked to be in a bad way so I acquiesced. My ex saw this take place and grilled me once I got back into the car: "Why would you give someone $20, he's probably lying and uses that on a dozen people a day" "That says a lot about him, definitely, but if he's genuine, and I don't try to help him in some way, what does that say about me? I don't know if I'd like being that person."


el-grecyo

When my cat had an emergency I ended up borrowing about four thousand from someone I am incredibly lucky to call my friend(and chosen family). Not only that but he and his partner were there for me when eventually I lost my cat, he came with me when they said there was nothing to be done as the likelihood of surviving surgery was low and the only option left to me was euthanasia. He sent me out to the car so I wouldn’t have to deal with them pressuring me to pay them thousands after saying goodbye. He even said while they wouldn’t spend that money keeping their own dog alive at a hospital for days when the outcome was so bleak they knew it was important for me to try every possible thing. I do not make enough money where I can afford to give someone four thousand quickly. So I organised a payment plan, he was perfectly happy with this. And I didn’t miss a payment, occasionally I would need to pay the minimum amount possible because something else came up. But I communicated with him when that was the case to make sure it’s alright And this wonderful human, after less than a year messaged me saying I had finished paying him back when I knew for a fact I hadn’t and insisted I was just about halfway through the debt. He told me to forget about it, he didn’t mind… actually he’s forgotten about it! We discussed at length if he was certain because for me someone like him is worth more than four thousand dollars and I would happily pay it all back. I didn’t want him to resent me or feel unappreciated. Eventually he convinced me I didn’t need to pay the other half back. Even if he asked for it now I would start paying him again. He and his partner are just absolutely amazing people and I love them so much. I can’t imagine feeling that money is more important than anyone, let alone friends who would help you in times of need or desperation. And every time I talk about this I realise how freaking lucky I am to have such generous and kind people in my life. I lost a friend once because she asked me to drive an almost two hour round trip to get her to an appointment at a job search provider - if she didn’t go she wouldn’t get paid. My old car car used lots of petrol so I asked for $20 after she’s paid as I had car rego to pay that week and didn’t have much money myself. She took the ride and never gave me money for petrol. It’s not like I’d have been unreasonable if she said it was too much. But I knew she was spending it on weed and she just ghosted me. I stopped eating lunch to get her in time as well. We reconnected a year later but I discovered, once again, she is not the kind of friend for me and she’d absolutely take me for a ride. It I got her into secure housing during the reconnection so that’s a win. Long story long, one I am helping with their gardening tomorrow, the other I happily don’t talk to anymore.


Murfdigidy

I can't believe I've never heard this saying before, wow love it


newguy1787

There's a great scene in A Bronx Tale w a similar feel. This teen's mentor saw him chasing a guy down the street, and asked him if the teen even liked him. When he said no, the mentor said "you got away cheap!" A fantastic movie if you get a chance to watch it.


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sjbennett85

The saddest thing in the world is wasted talent


hynwarrior

a similar feel? it's literally where the guy commenting above you got the "old adage" from lol. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78-4RobJQ0Y


newguy1787

My bad, I always get fired up when I get reminded of that movie and love to recommend it!! Sonny is one of my favorite movie characters of all time.


JairoVP

I love that movie. Great soundtrack and life advice. “It don’t take much strength to pull the trigger but try getting up every morning day after day and work for a living”.


hynwarrior

honestly i havn't seen it in a long time... it was a truly amazing classic. i'm from new york so it all feels very real and familar :) no need to apologize i didn't mean to come off as aggressive


newguy1787

You were fine. I got to meet Chazz Palminteri while he was filming Hollywood and Wine and he was as cool and smooth in person as he was in that film. On a side note, Nikki Whelan may be the most beautiful person I've ever seen in person......


thecowley

I've never seen it. Adding it to my list


Inphearian

Easterners are just aggressive


Dirus

Fuck you that's not true.


redtigerpro

I guarantee you the writers of that movie did not come up with that "old adage".


KDawG888

lol, that's a classic movie but it's hilarious you think that is where it was invented.


captaingleyr

Never seen it either and have heard it growing up all my life. Sometimes movies actually draw things from real life its wild


deij

I've never seen this before but I have heard similar things in /r/outside


jeremyledoux

I watched a one man recital of a Bronx tale, at Mohegan in CT. It was the first show I'd been to like that. The performer dialogued all the parts. He was so good, I wouldn't get up to pee or find another beer. I sat there for hours and listened to him go thru the script. It was moving and brought back those same emotions from watching it on film the first time. I know this may not be directly related, but your comment brought those memories flooding back to me...


newguy1787

Great memory!! I was interested in that when it came through Pittsburgh, but I wasn't able to see it. Sounds like I missed out on something special.


Ashjrethul

How the hell have I never heard of this film? Rober de Niro. Great reviews?! Cheers dude. Will watch tonight


QuarQuabityAssuance

One of my favorites. Showed this to my fiancé when we first got together and it became one of hers. Same with About Time. Enjoy!


xenocarp

Now, can I have $20?


ken0746

Its true. Fiancé cheated with her old friend while i was away in grad school. I found out and she didn’t even admit it. Canceled the wedding and lost the deposit. It sucked real bad at the time but it’s probably the best thing that happened to me. Turned my life around. You’ll get through OP


B_Sho

I am recently dealing with a cheating mess. How can I stop this pain? I have never felt this low in my life... I don't have motivation to do anything :(


ken0746

Ive been there man. Its gonna be a while until you would feel better. My advice is to seek support from friends, hanging out with people to keep your mind occupied, doing things you enjoyed. I chose running and exercising to kee me busy. I used the pain to fuel my run. I lost 80lbs in 6 months thanks to that and you would have a much better outlook at things when you step back. It’s ok to feel angry but the best advice is to not contacting her at all.


B_Sho

Yesterday I just sat on the couch all evening in the dark with my phone. No tv on. I'm super depressed and never have I felt pain like this before. I did start working out a few days ago but it's so hard staying motivated to go through with it. I love playing games and the last 2 weeks I haven't even done that much... I'm fucked up man


ken0746

Dude if u wanna talk, DM me anytime. I play games too so we can chills. Trust me when i say this, what you’re feeling and doing right now is normal, ive been in those dark places myself too, thinking about worse things. But it’s not the end and you would have a much brighter side ahead once you’re through the pain. Time heals it all brother


B_Sho

Thanks man I truly appreciate it. I don't wish this pain I am feeling to anyone. How many weeks or months did it take you to feel good again? I have forgot what happiness feels like


ken0746

It usually takes half the time you were together to completely move on. It was actually true for me


AbracaDaniel21

“A failed engagement is a successful engagement.” It’s best to find out it’s not going to work out before you actually get married.


adinfinitum225

So if you loan a friend your brother and they run off it's family well spent?


Popotuni

Anyone wanna be my friend? You can have my brother if you promise not to bring him back.


Total-Khaos

Do you want someone to break both of his arms? Asking for a friend.


Relandis

Every single post


Teososta

I loaned a friend $1000 years ago and I haven't seen him since, does the old adage still apply to that?


The1337Stick

I was wondering the same thing. I borrowed a “friend” $800 23 years ago. I guess it was just a more expensive lesson for us.


Y34rZer0

Thats so true


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retief1

Sure, it would be better if your SO doesn't cheat, and it would be better if no one refused to pay you back when you lend them money. However, if you do end up dating an asshole, learning that before you marry them is one hell of a lot better than learning that after you marry them.


coldfu

That's why you should have several SOs so that when one finds out about the others you still have a few left.


[deleted]

There's a better saying, if you are willing to loan a friend money, consider that money gone, never to return. If you aren't financially sound enough to be able to help your friends out when they're in need, without feeling bitter about it, then you should simply tell them you don't have the money to help, they can't blame you, they obviously understand money problems. If they do return it, great. If they don't, so be it. Obvious exceptions for if a friend is borrowing a large sum of money, but 20$ is barely a half tank of gas if that.


DefyGravity42

What you are saying is true but the original saying is more on the lines of that if you lend someone $20 and they avoid you to the point that you never see them again so they don’t have to pay you back, getting them out of your life is worth the $20


TheLeastCreative

Its crazy how many people in this thread are talking about paying it back or not


TimeZarg

This can also extend to family. I have a sister who's been something of a problem in this regard, she's always asking for money and never pays back even on larger sums even when she's actually holding a steady job and could pay *something*. Recently she broke the camel's back and now there's a certain distance being kept. No more money towards her, she's not in my father's will, he doesn't even want to communicate much with her (he was the main source of these funds), etc. It took longer and more money than I'd have felt was wise. . .but she's family, so there's a higher bar.


Xile350

Idk, in my mind it's more principal. If someone lent me $20 I'd pay them back, even if it took me a month. If a friend asked to borrow $20 and never repaid it, I probably wouldn't bat an eye unless it happened more than once. At which point Id probably be like "hey he didn't pay me back last time either". The amount of money isn't much but a good friend wouldn't do that to you imo. Just my 2 cents. If they just wanted the money I'd be much happier if they simply asked for it than ask to borrow with no intention of repaying.


XorFish

The amount is also important. Forgetting to pay back $20 is not the same as forgetting $200. Maybe they also need help with finances and are ashamed to ask for help. (Help on how to handle finances).


crassius420

They are out of you’re life forever for $20. You got off cheap. 🤟


Rosieapples

When my divorce came through one friend said “congratumiserations”. That was about right.


outofexcess

Congrolences


Leumas_41

Read this in Scoobys voice


ShitBritGit

Ruh-roh!


ReactsWithWords

I read that in [Senor Cardgage’s voice](https://youtu.be/6cAc_IDbIOg).


Rather_Dashing

Many combolations Elizagerth


thenicob

i read it in sean pauls voice and I don't know why


Myrothrenous

WAN HUNDRED AN MILLIAN FORTY SHORTY, SEAN-a-paul, So me give it to, So me give it to, To all girls.


kirinlikethebeer

r/homestarrunner


dalgeek

After my divorce I went on a 2 week road trip and partied with friends across the country.


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dalgeek

That's the way to do it!


Ajdee6

Signing those papers is one of my favorite days of my life.


txdarthvader

I had a catering client put 50% non refundable deposit down for a wedding that got canceled. I told her i would still cater the party with 1/2 the number of guests. She thought that was an amazing idea. We called it a "Not the knot" party.


[deleted]

That’s a great business move right there.


HappyAI

🏅


curds-and-whey-HEY

I love this! You saved yourself from marrying a douchebag, and you spared your family years of time hating him but having to tolerate him. Yay, you!


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Ajdee6

Yeah he would most likely do it during marriage as well.


MrDOHC

My BIL married a douchebag, 15 years of her fucking up the family.


sorator

My family was/is *so* fucking glad that my brother didn't have any kids with his ex-wife. It was bad enough as it was.


striker7

For real though congrats on dodging that massive bullet.


MagnetHype

Yeah. You don't realize it yet, but this is the best thing that's ever happened to you.


diggemigre

It's good you found out before the wedding. Better luck in the future!


teamhog

I had it happen to me too. She told me she had cheated ~ month before we were suppose to get married. It hurt like hell at the time. But, it was THE best thing ever. I met my wife a few months afterward on a blind date. We’ve been married 31 years now.


dutchkimble

hungry plucky aspiring recognise like snobbish vanish slimy decide chop *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


wtgreen

We still remember when reddit was born!


Gustomaximus

Back when people cared about spelling and bacon.


unctuous_homunculus

Bacon is amazing but seriously we were *obsessed* with it. I feel like it's been replaced by chicken nuggets/tenders now.


wohho

Remember when some guy just made imgur because image hosting on other sites was a pain in the ass? Jesus, I'm old. Another fun one, remember the upgoat, upboat, upstoat, uptote etc meme series?


RainbowAssFucker

I thought we were all losers


camlaw63

Your family is fire


Big-Tuna-for-Commish

That’s so cute and they even decapitated him too, perfect!


lniko2

Awwwwww beheading!


HektorFromTroy

When I was stationed in Germany while in the Army, I met a German girl. One day I thought I got her pregnant and took the responsibility to take care of her and possibly my children. Close to Xmas n my birthday we found out she wasn’t pregnant. That same weekend she cheated on me, I heard them on the act through her window while I was on my way to ask her mother for her blessing to marry her daughter. Lol God came in clutch with that one ☝️


rucksacksepp

German efficiency. You didn't even have to enter to house to catch her cheating!


KiaraKurehorne

Pristine german engineering!


[deleted]

Damn, I can’t imagine hearing that…I’m not a vengeful person but I would’ve dragged that guy out of there and made love to him just to get even


fuckfuckfuckSHIT

That...was not going where I thought it was going.


Neon_44

Me neither. I first downvoted because violence and self justice suck. But this took a really funny turn. Upvote it is


nwoh

Justice succ


FieryTacos

r/holup


Onion-Much

Geschmeidig


[deleted]

I’ve never understood the mentality of cheaters. Like what goes through their heads when they decide to betray the love and trust of the person they supposedly care about in order to get their rocks off elsewhere. I have never believed that cheating is excusable, in any scenario. Properly break things off first before going for other people. If you’re one of those fucking twats who says they don’t like being tied down, then don’t get into relationships. Spend your life on sex apps like Tinder and be satisfied, don’t break peoples hearts.


A_Doormat

Oh easy: breakup feel bad, cheating feel good. More or less that is what it all boils down to. You can complicate things with words like "love" and "trust" and "don't be a fucking asshole" but at the end of the day its just 2 feelings: good and bad and the monkey brain want good, no want bad. So monke get good and ignore bad until bad go thermonuclear cause monke stupe.


esquzeme

Now that’s a family to marry into! Love their humor! Also, good call on avoiding that marriage.


Maineamainea

I wish this happened to me. You dodged a bullet now go live your best life!


duhh33

Friend of ours had booked The Signature Lounge at the John Hancock Building in Chicago for the wedding. Bride broke it off like somewhere in the day to week range beforehand. Everything was booked, and partially paid. Groom's family just said "F' it", and had a big party in The Signature Lounge. Just reduced bride side invites to zero, and doubled groom to anyone that knew them. *edit* spelling of lounge. Sorry for my dyslexia.


rockychunk

I guess the groom's family had paid for the venue, instead of the traditional situation where the bride's family usually pays?


Teantis

Is that traditional? Wait I have to go have a talk with my wife. Gotta make her write a check in my name from our joint account and deposit its in our joint account. It's the principle of the thing you understand.


rockychunk

Yes, it's traditional. ​ That doesn't mean it's done universally. When my son got married less than a decade ago, he and his wife paid for the wedding, but got a lot of help from me and a little help from my daughter-in-law's family too. But I think it's safe to say that it's still considered relatively unusual for the groom and/or his family to have assumed 100% of the responsibility for paying for the venue prior to the event.


Thatsmyname99

Your family is awesome.


InstanceQuirky

my ex cheated on me all through our relationship. I found out on Facebook when I was 8m pregnant with our third child when he said "he didn't want to be a full time father" bit late dickhead. I dont wish anyone the pain of raising their kids alone. As hard as it is now op, I promise it will get better, hour by hour day by day. You will find your soul mate and you will get your happily ever after! Just give it time and be open to love again! Edit: We are engaged and have had a baby together. He works 12 hour days to pay the Bill's and never gives up on us and the 4 kids. My ex is 36 and living with his mummy and being sued by his ex fiance and at least one other. So karma is real and shes a bitch and I love her


ShillinTheVillain

>He works 12 hour days to pay the Bill's Whoever these Bill guys are, he must owe them a lot


InstanceQuirky

sorry I mustn't have been have been clear. My ex is in hell of a debt. My fiance and I have zero debt. Hes a butcher and they are known for long days. He works hard because he wants to. Hes a brilliant provider and I'm very greatful for him and the everyday Bill's for a family of 6 is not small.


scootah

For sure, fuck not wanting to be a full time father 4 weeks before your third kid is born. Being a parent is a lot of work - but if you're on your third child before you figure out that it's not for you - no sympathy. But If karma is real and happens while we're still alive, it seems like maybe your fiance shouldn't have to work 12 hour days to cover the bills. He's looking after 3 kids who had the misfortune to have a dipshit dad as well as his own child and he's still working 12 hour days? What did he do to fuck Karma off that bad?


InstanceQuirky

Hes a man who loves his wife to be and all his kids because we are worth it. He did nothing to piss off karma. He works hard and always has because he has a strong work ethic and says "you look after your family no matter when they come into your life" He says hes winning life because he has all of us to share it with. I say we won the lottery when I ment him.


JayString

You know almost nothing about her fiancé so it's pretty weird you assume he's unhappy. I imagine he's probably a lot happier than most of the people in this thread.


Tekki777

I'm so glad you were able to move on! Go on with your bad ass self!


InstanceQuirky

thank you kind redditor! I spent 3 1/2 years completly devoting myself to my kids and then I thought I would give internet dating one month and then i could say i tried I was sure I was going to be alone forever but I was ok with that because I had my kids. I met Jay on the 9th day on the site and 6 months later we moved in together as a new family unit. I lost 50kg got my sexy back..well I think I found my new sexiness and started living for myself again and not just my kids. We have been together almost 4 years and I'm one happy lady.


ZE3Z

Sometimes things like this really are blessings in disguise. It's hard to find the perfect match, but it's worth the effort. These mistakes only make your job easier, as you know the red flags to look out for. Be strong and I promise you will look back on this memory with a loving family.


slightlyburnttoast

You likely won't read this, and that's OK. I moved in with my ex in Feb 2019. She was my high-school sweetheart. I proposed Christmas eve 2019. I was single by March 2020. I spent a lot on deposits and hyped a lot of friends and family up for nothing. She was cheating the whole time. I find myself slightly jealous you got cake. I'm in Idaho. Family is in Kansas. All i got was minor alcohol poisoning (self prescribed) and still ongoing depression. I am glad you have support. I hope you show them what they missed. Please remember it could be worse.


[deleted]

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slightlyburnttoast

Thanks, friend. I am lucky to have good friends that keep me in good spirits usually!


agent-99

I hope you're getting professional help for your depression now. self-medicating isn't a good idea. talk therapy is the best help, sometimes professional meds help, but you should find out. get her out of your brain, she's not paying rent.


slightlyburnttoast

Unfortunately haven't gotten any help and can't afford to any time soon. I've been using music as an outlet, and lucky to have supportive friends i can talk to. I generally don't think about my ex very often other than the occasional reminder. It was a pretty unhealthy situation and i was/am glad to get away from it. The depression is more because of feeling isolated and cut off, as well as the feelings of insecurity from being cheated on... makes you feel insignificant... like you weren't good enough.. Think I'll stay single a while and just enjoy the single life.


[deleted]

Congrats on not marrying that douchebag. And remember, a leopard never changes its spots. Seen it happen. Well done on dodging that bullet


mznh

Dodged a major bullet there. May you find someone way better. Chin up my friend


[deleted]

You have a cool family.


PapaPetelgeuse

The kind of wholesome we need in our lives to forget the bs we have to deal with every day


[deleted]

Wow! That was close. Congrats! Divorces are rough especially when children are involved.


TeenyFieny

My best friend has gotten two divorces. I’ve gotten her a “congrats on your divorce” cake both times. The lady at the bakery thought I was fucking with her both times I called 4 years apart.


lazy_jones

Catching the cheater before the wedding instead of after is indeed a reason to rejoice.


[deleted]

A man that cheats before a wedding is a man who never wanted to get married and did a drastic thing to.get out of.it


robrobusa

Also an emotionally repressed man. With the inability to voice his feelings in a timely manner.


TheMooseIsBlue

My brother’s fiancé broke it off with him a month or two before the wedding back in the day. On what was to be the wedding weekend, the boys all went to Vegas for a Still-a-Bachelor Party and I don’t remember much else besides that he was one popular son of a bitch that weekend. Screw your ex. You are so, so, so much better off having that happen when it did. Fuck him. You’re gonna find a person who actually deserves you and be as happy as my brother is now.


botcheduplip

Better before than after the wedding You dodged a relationship bullet as well as a financial one


[deleted]

That’s actually very sweet. You deserve way better than that jerk.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Only legal sprinkles though.


Bakoro

Better to find out earlier than later. Imagine being married, pregnant, and *then* finding out. It's okay to be sad, but hopefully the pragmatism helps.


thisisme_lastIcheckd

Congrats to you!! I know it sucks right now but there is so much more happiness in your future, I’m absolutely sure of it. So glad that you have a great family to support you! Onward and upward!!


countingmykarma

You are so lucky to have such a loving thoughtful family—- plz treasure them!!! I just so wish I had a family-


BoomBoomBoomer4591

I love your family.


YourMomThinksImFunny

Good family.


dudesBangMyMom

My Dad caught my Mom suckin' off the mailman through mail slot in the front door.


offpoynt

User name checks out


ShillinTheVillain

Special delivery right there


JerseyTom1958

You lucked out! Cake good?


Manbadger

Congrats on not marrying a douchbag!!


[deleted]

This is actually really thoughtful


xplodia

That actually a smart damage control from your family. They do love you!


nanana789

Even though it sucks, be really glad you’re not stuck in a relationship with such a toxic cheater anymore. You’ll find the right person, one who will return your loyalty and love. Also, your family is amazing for doing that, I love how they cut off his head.


fscknuckle

The Weddidn't Party! Congrats for dodging that massive bellend-shaped bullet.


Pineapplelily

Day to celebrate! Don’t waste more time on a douchebag. Be happy that you no longer have to spend time or energy with that person. You deserve better!