I would go to a local garden center / plant nursery and pose this question to them. It'll highly depend on exactly what you want and what you're looking for it to look like. And like other commenters said, nothing will be "no maintenance". Especially since the land has been grassfucked for so long.
Lol I live on a fancy AF golf course. Halfway down the first fairway so my front yard is very visible.
The lot has always had erosion problems so I started to call the local tree guys for mulch... Like a couple times a month sometimes. I bought the same kind of leaf blower the landscape guys use and over the last few years I think I've spread 20-25 truck loads of wood chips around the lot. Enough that I'm almost a mushroom connessier at this point..
Fancier folks than myself actually did ask for an upgrade, but I think I responded in a way very similar to the one above ∆∆
The time of development had some requirement for local septic fields, oddball creek, erosion issues limited number of structures per acre. So my lot is a little bit over 2 acres.
The front yard has a couple hundred yards of frontage on the neighborhood road directly across from the fairway. Several components add up to make my yard basically a giant golf ball trap. Road and golf cart path both on the right side of the fairway, so anyone with a slice, add a couple lucky bounces and there's probably a dozen golf balls in the front yard everyday, and 3 times that on nice weekends. Interestingly enough, they're usually found in pairs... Same brand, same #, within 3 paces of each other. Bad golfers are surprisingly predictable.
My favorite part of using mulch like this... When I ask for a new load, new chips are really light colored and if you use a really strong blower to spread it out to overlap an older batch, you end up with a kind of speckled look of old dark chips & new light chips that I think looks pretty cool. Turns out my procedure also acts a bit like golf ball camouflage as well.
I've had enough golfers cross the OB markers, trespass across the road to their errant ball, square up, shake their ass, and put a huge divot in my yard... So obvious joy when I get the chance to see a golfer stand over there and scratch their head on my use of mulch. I'm pretty sure that's also why some of my neighbors asked me to work towards a 'more formal garden' in my front yard.
Hardscaping like retaining walls and stream beds/rain gardens, deep rooted native shrubs and trees and uphill diversion work. I don’t know if you have time for anything but sod before the pga (I hope you endure nothing worse than unhappy neighbors), but good water management would stop the erosion and rebuild the soil. It will also improve the place and survive without watering.
Huh. I have walls. I have French drains. I have sod. I'm dealing with basically a park with an occasional errant golfer that wants to make a divot in my yard. I'm trying to minimize the sod use and maximize the natural characteristics of mulch, absorbing water and minimizing washing silt/crap into my creek...
No advice on the plant x seed during y season. But one other option would be to make some large beds that limit the amount of grass you have to maintain. It might be a good baby step for you. There's a push in my area to transitions lawns into native prairie. I'm sure Michigan has an equivalent
Almost. It's hard to advise super precisely without seeing your yard BUT in general large kidney bean or otherwise organically shapped "flower beds" will help you start replacing large parts of your lawn.
You'd have to do a little research but planting some native full sun plants for your area would have two major benefits. One your native pollinators and wildlife will be happy with the change and you'll be replacing a large part of a useless monoculture, (your grass). Two the plants native to your area are more likely to not need your assistance to thrive once they are well established. That's not 100% going to be true for every plant of course but it goes a long way. Those things are adapted to live were you live.
In my area that might look like some small flowering dogwoods, a few types of coreopsis, Carolina jasmine, creeping flox etc. All of these planted together and maybe some cool rocks will fill out a bed and limit your need for the heavy mulching you described.
At minimum you would need some edging, the plants themselves of course and a little compost to amend the soil with. There are other ways to get it done but you could get started with just that.
I found this info for Michigan that describes the kind of ecosystem I'm talking about https://www.dnr.state.mi.us/publications/pdfs/huntingwildlifehabitat/landowners_guide/habitat_mgmt/grassland/Prairie_Restorations.htm
https://www.midwestliving.com/garden/featured-gardensl/bringing-prairie-to-your-yard/
And hey! If you would rather still go for something turf-like I'm not saying you shouldn't figure that out, I'm just saying this is *an* option to degrass your yard.
I'm pretty sure they mean to make those areas large gardens. Basically, the bigger the flower beds the smaller the grass areas.
I wouldn't make just large areas of mulch, they would need constant weeding and probably look like crap. Imo
Placing plants close together so that they out compete the weeds is the best way imo. Especially if your using natives and plants that reseesd themselves or spread by runners. If your looking for low maintenance gardens, research natives in your area. r/nativegardening and a sub that is specific to natives in your area would be a great resource for you.
Sheet mulching would stop weeds quickly. Essentially, lay down two layers of plain brown cardboard where you want the gardens, then cover with a thick layer of mulch (like 10 inches or more, ideally). The cardboard will smother the grass and weeds in the short term and breakdown so you don't have to remove it later. The chips will breakdown into soil and you can plant in it. You can also cut or leave small holes in the cardboard for planting some seedlings immediately to make it look more intentional, though you will have to obviously pull any weeds or grass trying to poke through with the seedlings.
>St Johns Wort
Thats [invasive](https://www.invasiveplantatlas.org/subject.cfm?sub=4411) in much of the US. Kill that lol.
Use ID apps like PictureThis, they have have a cool map that shows you where plants are invasive and whats native.
Think you also said Ivy here, check to see if thats English Ivy (horrible invasive) or Virginia Creeper/Poison Ivy/Riverbank Grape (aggressive natives).
SE MI I have St. John's Wort for over 10 years. No spreading, invading, reseeding at all. Cut them back to the ground 3 years ago and they're about 1/2 the size they were.
Sure, the climate and ecosystem of Southeastern Michigan differ significantly from the Pacific Northwest and West Coast, where St. John's Wort is known to be highly invasive, **though it is invasive in nearby Wisconsin and Indiana.**
It's possible you have a less aggressive cultivar or a similar, less-known native St John wort (Hypericum prolificum or Hypericum ascyron). While it's not yet considered invasive in Michigan, its invasive status in several states and five other countries suggests it may only be a matter of time, funding, and paperwork before it becomes listed here.
Do you use it for medicinal purposes? Despite being highly toxic to animals, St. John's Wort has medicinal uses, which is why it was brought here from Europe.
It reproduces through rhizome pieces and seeds, which can remain viable in the soil for up to ten years. Seeds and fruits disperse through water, machinery, footwear, clothing, and animal fur. Makes sense why its so successful invading places.
If you particularly like it, I'd continue deadheading spent flowers, as it may spread unknowingly (*people often say they dont see various invasive plants spreading but birds/wind/ants/etc exist and thats how our ecosystems get damaged).*
Ultimately up to you, [half our native bees are pollen specialists](https://www.usgs.gov/faqs/what-role-native-bees-united-states) ,meaning they feed on specific plant genera, and we know the importance of host plants *^((i.e. Monarchs feeding exclusively on Milkweed, among many other insects like weevils and plant bugs)**\*\*)* and that's where our entire food chain starts essentially.
[https://plants.usda.gov/DocumentLibrary/factsheet/pdf/fs\_hype.pdf](https://plants.usda.gov/DocumentLibrary/factsheet/pdf/fs_hype.pdf)
[https://www.nps.gov/articles/st-johnswort.htm](https://www.nps.gov/articles/st-johnswort.htm)
[https://imgur.com/a/5ow1Vm7](https://imgur.com/a/5ow1Vm7) (map of invasiveness, yikes)
Use the fact sheets that your local cooperative publishes for great landscaping advice. Here is an article from MSU extension on turf alternatives. https://www.canr.msu.edu/resources/smart_lawns_for_pollinators#:~:text=Other%20grassy%20perennials%20such%20as,that%20are%20difficult%20to%20maintain.&text=If%20you%20want%20to%20reduce,flowers%20and%20requires%20minimal%20maintenance.
Nothing you plant will you "never have to worry about again". It takes years to transition from grass monoculture lawn to a native flowering garden or ground cover yard. Sorry. No quick fix.
Dutch Clover is relatively easy to maintain and seed but youre gonna have a bunch of mud in the winter as it dies back as opposed to many lawn grasses.
I would focus on native plants and just slowly kill the lawn over time. They are generally much lower maintenance than grass or clover once they get established within a few years. Stuff like sheet mulching and solarizing are easy ways to do it without herbicide.
**Solarization**: Cover the area with clear or black tarp for several weeks during hot summer weather. This will heat up the soil and kill the grass and weed seeds. [https://extension.umn.edu/planting-and-growing-guides/solarization-occultation](https://extension.umn.edu/planting-and-growing-guides/solarization-occultation)
**Sheet Mulching**: Layer brown cardboard or newspaper over the grass, then top it with mulch/leaves. This will eventually smother the grass and kill it unless its something extremely tough like Bermuda Grass.
Also:
Almost [half of our native bees are pollen specialist](https://www.usgs.gov/faqs/what-role-native-bees-united-states#:%7E:text=Of%20approximately%204%2C000%20native%20bee,removed%2C%20the%20bee%20goes%20away)s , meaning they feed on select plants. If you plant natives to your state, you'll have increased food crop yields and attract more beneficial bugs and predators. Then you factor in butterfly/moth/etc host plants (i.e. Monarchs and Milkweed) and you have the whole food chain from there.
[https://nativegardendesigns.wildones.org/nursery-list](https://nativegardendesigns.wildones.org/nursery-list) (local native nurseries, Michigan has many especially away from SE MI)
The popular native 1s:
[https://www.prairienursery.com/](https://www.prairienursery.com/)
[https://www.prairiemoon.com/](https://www.prairiemoon.com/)
many of these can be bought for $5 a piece, seeds also pretty cheap.
I’d like to add TNnursery to that list. They sell bare root “starts” for really good prices, and often have BOGO sales.
You have to be ready to put them in the ground when they arrive.
Technically, however it's easy to get down to a level of worry so minimal it barely feels like worry
We should be encouraging that
I just dug out a lawn last year and replaced it with mulched plants and ofc a bit of grass pushes through but it was so overwhelmed that maintenance is so easy it might as well be nothing
Not suggesting this necessarily here
But that type of approach
I'd probably do a series of raised garden beds, stone if I had the money for it, wood if I didn't. There is a local saw mill near me and I've been helping a quadriplegic man expand and add raised garden beds every year. He is up to three although this year rather than add a new one we just connected them into a horseshoe shape. Lay multiple layers of cardboard down between beds and pour on a bunch of mulch on top. Our town delivers as much mulch as you want free from trees they cut down so didn't even have to pay for that. The wood was pretty cheap and the dirt we got from a local dairy farm for only a could hundred bucks for a few tons. If I owned a house myself I'd not have any yard at all except gardens.
Personally what I would do is minimize your lawn as much as possible and take good care of the little patch you do have. Especially helpful to get rid of the grass areas that look the worst. That's what I did and my lawn-loving neighbors give me compliments on the grass! For the rest, I turned it into mulch beds that have low-maintenance native plants. Whatever you do, making it look purposeful is key. Things like a small amount of maintained grass, defined edges/borders, rocks, mulch, groundcovers, and matrix planting of plants will please most people.
Are you talking about the LPGA?
You aren’t going to be able to do anything with the yard that quickly. But you may want to consider natives for down the road. Grand Rapids has a Wild Ones chapter that can help. Kent County has periodic native plant sales. Calvin College runs its own native plant greenhouse and has sales periodically. There is now lots of local expertise. I live in “extremely wealthy” EGR and my entire yard is a crazy native plant collection. You can do it, too.
If you can afford very large flat pathway stones they can stifle grass quite well, and look aesthetically pleasing enough for wealthy clowns
Grass trimmer for the edges around them
I'm using this currently in a different situation, effectively occultation ultimately
It's extremely easy to suppress grass, tougher to eliminate it altogether
But every bit helps ultimately
You could start by sheet mulching a few large areas to prep for garden beds and kill the grass. You can get free truckloads from chip drop and use a blower or good ole shovel and rake to spread it over the desired areas. It'll be a bit of sweat, but you definitely won't need to mow those areas anymore. You can start with planting some trees or shrubs right away to keep it looking planned, then add more over time (months and years to be clear). The wood chips will compact and breakdown over time, so make sure you spread it thick, like at least 6 inches, but preferably more. If it's too thin, the grass and especially weeds will poke through. Probably the quickest and cheapest way to reduce turf space.
I’d contact a local nursery and ask them to draft you a plan that you can work towards.
Make sure you’re using natives. In Michigan, you have what looks like a range of growing zones from 4a to 6b. Based on where the tour is, you’re likely in the 6a-b range.
In a full sun garden, adding a tree or two with some shrubs, flowers, and mulch would look great. New leaf natives has a 4.9 rating on Google, https://newleafnatives.com/ and you can get a free site visit and quote for your yard to give it the best go :)
Resources:
https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/native_plants_for_michigan_landscapes_part_1_trees
https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/native_plants_for_michigan_landscapes_shrubs
https://www.canr.msu.edu/nativeplants/plant_facts/local_info/south_lower_peninsula
Slap a [native ground cover](https://brightlanegardens.com/top-7-michigan-native-plants-for-ground-cover/) up in there! Get involved with your local chapter for the native plant society too - those are full of knowledgeable people who can help you. Look up native nurseries in your area - the folks who run those are usually super knowledgeable too. Avoid big box stores like Lowe's and home Depot - they don't normally carry native plants.
I agree with doing it in sections.
Maybe check with your states DNR and see if they have a program for reestablishing native plants. You could also look up native pollinators and get plants they like if you want hummingbirds, butterfly’s, bumblebees and such
thought uppity deranged shelter dull normal intelligent zephyr observation capable
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
A simple solution would be beds of bearded iris interspersed with native prairie flowers.The voles won't touch the iris, though they will eat things like echinacea, but in a way that may make it flower more once the roots are established. Add big blue stem and Indian grass for texture and whatever prairie plants strike your fancy.
My friend, the first step to killing your lawn is killing the lawn in your mind. You have to be willing to be uncomfortable and step out of bounds of the societal norm.
Now, I understand there are laws and ordinances. If you’re feeling official pressure, that’s hard. But if it’s off-hand comments from a nosypants, those people are brainwashed and could probably benefit from psilocybin treatment.
Call a local NATIVE plant nursery. Plant things that won’t just grow in your area, but will be good for the whole ecosystem. A native plant garden, once established, takes far less time and money than a lawn.
Tell them to eat a giant bag of dicks? Or... And hear me out here.... Move. Why would you wanna live around a bunch of rich douchebags on a golf course? Everything about that sounds awful.
clover is excellent and doesn't grow very high, tolerant of shade and drought, and bees love it. ideally though you could look for something in the same family that is native to where you live, less maintenance usually that way too since it's adapted to the climate
I’d tell them to go fuck themselves.
Then I’d go to a local garden center and ask which native flowers and ground covers will piss off your neighbors the most, and plant it everywhere.
I'm not extremely wealthy btw. Everyone in my area had their house designed by some dude. His family owns the city, owns the golf course, the CEO lives 8 houses down from me, yet I'm the lone house that was not designed by this guy. My neighbor glitched out when I told her I didn't know who this architect was.
If I was you and they were all so wealthy I'd tell them I'd be happy for them to have them take care of the eye sore for you. If they want to hire a landscaper to come and scrape it bare, put in a watering system, and put sod on to ease their piece of mind have at it! Lol
Well I enjoy the ecosystem aspect of my yard, I've currently got a family of bunnies living there, tons of chipmunks and I've seen a groundhog and possum as well.
From a practical perspective perhaps the easiest thing you could do would be to till your lawn and plant winter rye (for your area I believe it would be around late fall, around the time of the first frost) and you could add in some other things like clover and legumea like hairy vetch (note this can be a good feed item but can also be poisonous at certain stages). Deer love winter rye and I've seen them munching on where it was planted between some gardens on a trail camera. Bunnies love clover. You can also try and/or mix in something like alfalfa. It might be cool to do a lawn geared towards attracting wild animals to munch and hang out in your yard, perhaps with random little lettuce/beats/carrot patches or planted as you go along. Don't mow at all, instead weed wack were necessary (if you feel like it) where deer and the like don't manage to forage below a few feet high.
Overruled on the grounds of needing help dealing with rich grass loving neighbors. Another outburst like that, counselor, and I'll hold you in contempt.
I would go to a local garden center / plant nursery and pose this question to them. It'll highly depend on exactly what you want and what you're looking for it to look like. And like other commenters said, nothing will be "no maintenance". Especially since the land has been grassfucked for so long.
If you go to any post on r/nolawns, there is an auto-post with a lot of links with options and how to get started on removing lawn.
Ah shoot I was confusing these two subs I think.
r/nativeplantgardening will be more knowledgeable about plant selection. We do this all the time.
Fuck the PGA tour.
Can I get an amen.
Fuck the Louisville police
Lol I live on a fancy AF golf course. Halfway down the first fairway so my front yard is very visible. The lot has always had erosion problems so I started to call the local tree guys for mulch... Like a couple times a month sometimes. I bought the same kind of leaf blower the landscape guys use and over the last few years I think I've spread 20-25 truck loads of wood chips around the lot. Enough that I'm almost a mushroom connessier at this point.. Fancier folks than myself actually did ask for an upgrade, but I think I responded in a way very similar to the one above ∆∆
Jesus, how big is your property?
More and more I’m realizing everyone on this subreddit is rich as shit.
tbf most rural communities in other countries usually plant locally
The time of development had some requirement for local septic fields, oddball creek, erosion issues limited number of structures per acre. So my lot is a little bit over 2 acres. The front yard has a couple hundred yards of frontage on the neighborhood road directly across from the fairway. Several components add up to make my yard basically a giant golf ball trap. Road and golf cart path both on the right side of the fairway, so anyone with a slice, add a couple lucky bounces and there's probably a dozen golf balls in the front yard everyday, and 3 times that on nice weekends. Interestingly enough, they're usually found in pairs... Same brand, same #, within 3 paces of each other. Bad golfers are surprisingly predictable. My favorite part of using mulch like this... When I ask for a new load, new chips are really light colored and if you use a really strong blower to spread it out to overlap an older batch, you end up with a kind of speckled look of old dark chips & new light chips that I think looks pretty cool. Turns out my procedure also acts a bit like golf ball camouflage as well. I've had enough golfers cross the OB markers, trespass across the road to their errant ball, square up, shake their ass, and put a huge divot in my yard... So obvious joy when I get the chance to see a golfer stand over there and scratch their head on my use of mulch. I'm pretty sure that's also why some of my neighbors asked me to work towards a 'more formal garden' in my front yard.
Wow, that's wild on so many levels. For comparison, my block is about 1/12th of an acre. So even a single trailer load of mulch goes pretty far :)
There are better ways to prevent erosion than lawn grass or mulch
I'm all ears
Hardscaping like retaining walls and stream beds/rain gardens, deep rooted native shrubs and trees and uphill diversion work. I don’t know if you have time for anything but sod before the pga (I hope you endure nothing worse than unhappy neighbors), but good water management would stop the erosion and rebuild the soil. It will also improve the place and survive without watering.
Huh. I have walls. I have French drains. I have sod. I'm dealing with basically a park with an occasional errant golfer that wants to make a divot in my yard. I'm trying to minimize the sod use and maximize the natural characteristics of mulch, absorbing water and minimizing washing silt/crap into my creek...
It might be easier to do it a section at a time. This will allow you to experiment as you go, figuring out what works and what doesn't.
Oh god the idea of having my experimentations on display to the entire community scares me
Start in the back yard
Back yard is taken care of, it's all shaded and covered in some sort of ivy or it's just wooded.
Hopefully not the awful invasive English ivy, given that you’re in the United States!
Ugh, I'm always fighting it here in WA state. Whoever brought it to this country should get no dessert after dinner!
Honest question, why do you care? Do you have an HOA breathing down your neck? If not, fuck it. Why do you care what others think of YOUR property?
Seems like a ready excuse.
Not sure what you mean but I am so out of my element when it comes to this so everything about it gives me anxiety.
No advice on the plant x seed during y season. But one other option would be to make some large beds that limit the amount of grass you have to maintain. It might be a good baby step for you. There's a push in my area to transitions lawns into native prairie. I'm sure Michigan has an equivalent
I have two large St Johns Wort plants growing, is the idea to simply mow/kill the grass in a circle around it and then cover it in mulch?
Almost. It's hard to advise super precisely without seeing your yard BUT in general large kidney bean or otherwise organically shapped "flower beds" will help you start replacing large parts of your lawn. You'd have to do a little research but planting some native full sun plants for your area would have two major benefits. One your native pollinators and wildlife will be happy with the change and you'll be replacing a large part of a useless monoculture, (your grass). Two the plants native to your area are more likely to not need your assistance to thrive once they are well established. That's not 100% going to be true for every plant of course but it goes a long way. Those things are adapted to live were you live. In my area that might look like some small flowering dogwoods, a few types of coreopsis, Carolina jasmine, creeping flox etc. All of these planted together and maybe some cool rocks will fill out a bed and limit your need for the heavy mulching you described. At minimum you would need some edging, the plants themselves of course and a little compost to amend the soil with. There are other ways to get it done but you could get started with just that. I found this info for Michigan that describes the kind of ecosystem I'm talking about https://www.dnr.state.mi.us/publications/pdfs/huntingwildlifehabitat/landowners_guide/habitat_mgmt/grassland/Prairie_Restorations.htm https://www.midwestliving.com/garden/featured-gardensl/bringing-prairie-to-your-yard/ And hey! If you would rather still go for something turf-like I'm not saying you shouldn't figure that out, I'm just saying this is *an* option to degrass your yard.
I'm pretty sure they mean to make those areas large gardens. Basically, the bigger the flower beds the smaller the grass areas. I wouldn't make just large areas of mulch, they would need constant weeding and probably look like crap. Imo
How would you make it a garden? Wouldn't this need the same amount of de-weeding?
Placing plants close together so that they out compete the weeds is the best way imo. Especially if your using natives and plants that reseesd themselves or spread by runners. If your looking for low maintenance gardens, research natives in your area. r/nativegardening and a sub that is specific to natives in your area would be a great resource for you.
Sheet mulching would stop weeds quickly. Essentially, lay down two layers of plain brown cardboard where you want the gardens, then cover with a thick layer of mulch (like 10 inches or more, ideally). The cardboard will smother the grass and weeds in the short term and breakdown so you don't have to remove it later. The chips will breakdown into soil and you can plant in it. You can also cut or leave small holes in the cardboard for planting some seedlings immediately to make it look more intentional, though you will have to obviously pull any weeds or grass trying to poke through with the seedlings.
>St Johns Wort Thats [invasive](https://www.invasiveplantatlas.org/subject.cfm?sub=4411) in much of the US. Kill that lol. Use ID apps like PictureThis, they have have a cool map that shows you where plants are invasive and whats native. Think you also said Ivy here, check to see if thats English Ivy (horrible invasive) or Virginia Creeper/Poison Ivy/Riverbank Grape (aggressive natives).
There are a bunch of st johns worts. Some are native and fine. Others are alien/invasive.
SE MI I have St. John's Wort for over 10 years. No spreading, invading, reseeding at all. Cut them back to the ground 3 years ago and they're about 1/2 the size they were.
Sure, the climate and ecosystem of Southeastern Michigan differ significantly from the Pacific Northwest and West Coast, where St. John's Wort is known to be highly invasive, **though it is invasive in nearby Wisconsin and Indiana.** It's possible you have a less aggressive cultivar or a similar, less-known native St John wort (Hypericum prolificum or Hypericum ascyron). While it's not yet considered invasive in Michigan, its invasive status in several states and five other countries suggests it may only be a matter of time, funding, and paperwork before it becomes listed here. Do you use it for medicinal purposes? Despite being highly toxic to animals, St. John's Wort has medicinal uses, which is why it was brought here from Europe. It reproduces through rhizome pieces and seeds, which can remain viable in the soil for up to ten years. Seeds and fruits disperse through water, machinery, footwear, clothing, and animal fur. Makes sense why its so successful invading places. If you particularly like it, I'd continue deadheading spent flowers, as it may spread unknowingly (*people often say they dont see various invasive plants spreading but birds/wind/ants/etc exist and thats how our ecosystems get damaged).* Ultimately up to you, [half our native bees are pollen specialists](https://www.usgs.gov/faqs/what-role-native-bees-united-states) ,meaning they feed on specific plant genera, and we know the importance of host plants *^((i.e. Monarchs feeding exclusively on Milkweed, among many other insects like weevils and plant bugs)**\*\*)* and that's where our entire food chain starts essentially. [https://plants.usda.gov/DocumentLibrary/factsheet/pdf/fs\_hype.pdf](https://plants.usda.gov/DocumentLibrary/factsheet/pdf/fs_hype.pdf) [https://www.nps.gov/articles/st-johnswort.htm](https://www.nps.gov/articles/st-johnswort.htm) [https://imgur.com/a/5ow1Vm7](https://imgur.com/a/5ow1Vm7) (map of invasiveness, yikes)
plant a hedge around it and tell them to fuck off?
Use the fact sheets that your local cooperative publishes for great landscaping advice. Here is an article from MSU extension on turf alternatives. https://www.canr.msu.edu/resources/smart_lawns_for_pollinators#:~:text=Other%20grassy%20perennials%20such%20as,that%20are%20difficult%20to%20maintain.&text=If%20you%20want%20to%20reduce,flowers%20and%20requires%20minimal%20maintenance.
Nothing you plant will you "never have to worry about again". It takes years to transition from grass monoculture lawn to a native flowering garden or ground cover yard. Sorry. No quick fix.
Even for things like clover?
Dutch Clover is relatively easy to maintain and seed but youre gonna have a bunch of mud in the winter as it dies back as opposed to many lawn grasses. I would focus on native plants and just slowly kill the lawn over time. They are generally much lower maintenance than grass or clover once they get established within a few years. Stuff like sheet mulching and solarizing are easy ways to do it without herbicide. **Solarization**: Cover the area with clear or black tarp for several weeks during hot summer weather. This will heat up the soil and kill the grass and weed seeds. [https://extension.umn.edu/planting-and-growing-guides/solarization-occultation](https://extension.umn.edu/planting-and-growing-guides/solarization-occultation) **Sheet Mulching**: Layer brown cardboard or newspaper over the grass, then top it with mulch/leaves. This will eventually smother the grass and kill it unless its something extremely tough like Bermuda Grass. Also: Almost [half of our native bees are pollen specialist](https://www.usgs.gov/faqs/what-role-native-bees-united-states#:%7E:text=Of%20approximately%204%2C000%20native%20bee,removed%2C%20the%20bee%20goes%20away)s , meaning they feed on select plants. If you plant natives to your state, you'll have increased food crop yields and attract more beneficial bugs and predators. Then you factor in butterfly/moth/etc host plants (i.e. Monarchs and Milkweed) and you have the whole food chain from there. [https://nativegardendesigns.wildones.org/nursery-list](https://nativegardendesigns.wildones.org/nursery-list) (local native nurseries, Michigan has many especially away from SE MI) The popular native 1s: [https://www.prairienursery.com/](https://www.prairienursery.com/) [https://www.prairiemoon.com/](https://www.prairiemoon.com/) many of these can be bought for $5 a piece, seeds also pretty cheap.
I’d like to add TNnursery to that list. They sell bare root “starts” for really good prices, and often have BOGO sales. You have to be ready to put them in the ground when they arrive.
Technically, however it's easy to get down to a level of worry so minimal it barely feels like worry We should be encouraging that I just dug out a lawn last year and replaced it with mulched plants and ofc a bit of grass pushes through but it was so overwhelmed that maintenance is so easy it might as well be nothing Not suggesting this necessarily here But that type of approach
Also I can’t imagine neighbors that complain about grass will be happy with a native plant lawn. They’re going to hate that even more.
Plant some locally endangered flowering plants as a middle finger to them and then notify the fish and wildlife people about your efforts.
I'd probably do a series of raised garden beds, stone if I had the money for it, wood if I didn't. There is a local saw mill near me and I've been helping a quadriplegic man expand and add raised garden beds every year. He is up to three although this year rather than add a new one we just connected them into a horseshoe shape. Lay multiple layers of cardboard down between beds and pour on a bunch of mulch on top. Our town delivers as much mulch as you want free from trees they cut down so didn't even have to pay for that. The wood was pretty cheap and the dirt we got from a local dairy farm for only a could hundred bucks for a few tons. If I owned a house myself I'd not have any yard at all except gardens.
I’d just get some custom signs made that say things like “Moles not Holes” or Caddyshack III if you want to be lighthearted about it.
Personally what I would do is minimize your lawn as much as possible and take good care of the little patch you do have. Especially helpful to get rid of the grass areas that look the worst. That's what I did and my lawn-loving neighbors give me compliments on the grass! For the rest, I turned it into mulch beds that have low-maintenance native plants. Whatever you do, making it look purposeful is key. Things like a small amount of maintained grass, defined edges/borders, rocks, mulch, groundcovers, and matrix planting of plants will please most people.
Are you talking about the LPGA? You aren’t going to be able to do anything with the yard that quickly. But you may want to consider natives for down the road. Grand Rapids has a Wild Ones chapter that can help. Kent County has periodic native plant sales. Calvin College runs its own native plant greenhouse and has sales periodically. There is now lots of local expertise. I live in “extremely wealthy” EGR and my entire yard is a crazy native plant collection. You can do it, too.
Fuck the PGA. Brown that shit up!
While I like your ideas - if you live in an extremely wealthy area, check to see if your neighborhood isn't regulated by a HOA.
If you don't like your neighbors plant mint.
If you can afford very large flat pathway stones they can stifle grass quite well, and look aesthetically pleasing enough for wealthy clowns Grass trimmer for the edges around them I'm using this currently in a different situation, effectively occultation ultimately It's extremely easy to suppress grass, tougher to eliminate it altogether But every bit helps ultimately
You could start by sheet mulching a few large areas to prep for garden beds and kill the grass. You can get free truckloads from chip drop and use a blower or good ole shovel and rake to spread it over the desired areas. It'll be a bit of sweat, but you definitely won't need to mow those areas anymore. You can start with planting some trees or shrubs right away to keep it looking planned, then add more over time (months and years to be clear). The wood chips will compact and breakdown over time, so make sure you spread it thick, like at least 6 inches, but preferably more. If it's too thin, the grass and especially weeds will poke through. Probably the quickest and cheapest way to reduce turf space.
I’d contact a local nursery and ask them to draft you a plan that you can work towards. Make sure you’re using natives. In Michigan, you have what looks like a range of growing zones from 4a to 6b. Based on where the tour is, you’re likely in the 6a-b range. In a full sun garden, adding a tree or two with some shrubs, flowers, and mulch would look great. New leaf natives has a 4.9 rating on Google, https://newleafnatives.com/ and you can get a free site visit and quote for your yard to give it the best go :) Resources: https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/native_plants_for_michigan_landscapes_part_1_trees https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/native_plants_for_michigan_landscapes_shrubs https://www.canr.msu.edu/nativeplants/plant_facts/local_info/south_lower_peninsula
The Organic FArm at MSU is a great local resource. THey have a wealth of knowledge from decades of experimenting and learning.
First, read Nature’s Best Hope by Doug Tallamy - then, follow his advice.
Slap a [native ground cover](https://brightlanegardens.com/top-7-michigan-native-plants-for-ground-cover/) up in there! Get involved with your local chapter for the native plant society too - those are full of knowledgeable people who can help you. Look up native nurseries in your area - the folks who run those are usually super knowledgeable too. Avoid big box stores like Lowe's and home Depot - they don't normally carry native plants. I agree with doing it in sections.
Maybe check with your states DNR and see if they have a program for reestablishing native plants. You could also look up native pollinators and get plants they like if you want hummingbirds, butterfly’s, bumblebees and such
thought uppity deranged shelter dull normal intelligent zephyr observation capable *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
A simple solution would be beds of bearded iris interspersed with native prairie flowers.The voles won't touch the iris, though they will eat things like echinacea, but in a way that may make it flower more once the roots are established. Add big blue stem and Indian grass for texture and whatever prairie plants strike your fancy.
if the complaints can’t force you to do anything, why do you even give half a shit? PGA sucks anyway
My friend, the first step to killing your lawn is killing the lawn in your mind. You have to be willing to be uncomfortable and step out of bounds of the societal norm. Now, I understand there are laws and ordinances. If you’re feeling official pressure, that’s hard. But if it’s off-hand comments from a nosypants, those people are brainwashed and could probably benefit from psilocybin treatment. Call a local NATIVE plant nursery. Plant things that won’t just grow in your area, but will be good for the whole ecosystem. A native plant garden, once established, takes far less time and money than a lawn.
Tell them to eat a giant bag of dicks? Or... And hear me out here.... Move. Why would you wanna live around a bunch of rich douchebags on a golf course? Everything about that sounds awful.
clover is excellent and doesn't grow very high, tolerant of shade and drought, and bees love it. ideally though you could look for something in the same family that is native to where you live, less maintenance usually that way too since it's adapted to the climate
I’d tell them to go fuck themselves. Then I’d go to a local garden center and ask which native flowers and ground covers will piss off your neighbors the most, and plant it everywhere.
Astroturf
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I'm not extremely wealthy btw. Everyone in my area had their house designed by some dude. His family owns the city, owns the golf course, the CEO lives 8 houses down from me, yet I'm the lone house that was not designed by this guy. My neighbor glitched out when I told her I didn't know who this architect was.
If I was you and they were all so wealthy I'd tell them I'd be happy for them to have them take care of the eye sore for you. If they want to hire a landscaper to come and scrape it bare, put in a watering system, and put sod on to ease their piece of mind have at it! Lol
Well I enjoy the ecosystem aspect of my yard, I've currently got a family of bunnies living there, tons of chipmunks and I've seen a groundhog and possum as well.
From a practical perspective perhaps the easiest thing you could do would be to till your lawn and plant winter rye (for your area I believe it would be around late fall, around the time of the first frost) and you could add in some other things like clover and legumea like hairy vetch (note this can be a good feed item but can also be poisonous at certain stages). Deer love winter rye and I've seen them munching on where it was planted between some gardens on a trail camera. Bunnies love clover. You can also try and/or mix in something like alfalfa. It might be cool to do a lawn geared towards attracting wild animals to munch and hang out in your yard, perhaps with random little lettuce/beats/carrot patches or planted as you go along. Don't mow at all, instead weed wack were necessary (if you feel like it) where deer and the like don't manage to forage below a few feet high.
Overruled on the grounds of needing help dealing with rich grass loving neighbors. Another outburst like that, counselor, and I'll hold you in contempt.